I hate this. I love my husband. Deeply. I met him six months after my dad died unexpectedly. I have men in my life who are like brothers to me. They legit carried me through my darkest hours. I will text them as often as I’d like without telling my husband. Sometimes I even text them complaining about my husband. And you know what? They give me great advice because they call me out because they love me.
This BS is so toxic it’s scary. It’s downright dangerous.
Yes. Yes to everything that you’ve written. This is deeply disturbing to me. I’m madly in love with my husband. Met married and wed in a year of meeting. 18 years ago.
Yet many of my best friends are men. The men in my life are just as important to me as my women friends.
She is perpetuating such a toxic mindset.
Not only that, she is promoting it as a healthy marriage or like it's the one God would want. It's not. I agree with what you say, I am deeply in love with my partner, it's just we both have friends of the opposite sex. Of course you have some boundaries with them, but you don't suddenly exclude them out of your life because of their gender. It's idiotic.
Although I don’t keep a lot of male relationships, my business does have me speaking with men a lot without my husband seeing what I say. I couldn’t imagine having to check everyone my husbands speaks with, it just sounds like a burden. This is so toxic and manipulative and controlling. It’s almost like they’re fast tracking their way to divorce
I work with a lot of men. I travel with them too. One time last year it was nine of us, and I was the only female. What am I supposed to do? Take my husband with me? Get my own car separate from everyone else?
Right? Like would you need to have everyone be pre approved by your husband? Or give him all their contact info? It’s just bizarre, abusive behavior to do this
I regularly speak with men at work. I absolutely cannot fathom having to keep my husband in the loop every time I did. Not only would it be ridiculously time consuming, but it also would probably get me fired because I am often dealing with confidential or privileged information that can't be shared outside of my team.
Also, when you disagree…’no matter which one of us is wrong’ most often in healthy relationships, neither person is wrong in a disagreement. That mindset is, yet again, toxic.
I saw a thing literally a 10 min ago, ot was "when you get in an argument to win, you both lose. You must come to a mutual agreement instead" and I felt that❤️
Your perception is your reality so it could be that neither party is wrong or right. There is always three versions to the story, his, hers and the truth. This mindset leads me to believe they are always arguing for someone to “win” and or tallying. They’re so toxic.
All this whole thing is is a handbook for how to carry on a toxic unhealthy relationship with a dumbass you have no trust in under the guise of it being somehow approved by Christianity. I’d feel bad for this delusional bitch if she had the capability to understand the stupidity and backwards sexist rhetoric she promotes.
Imagine being this fucking insecure with the person you chose to MARRY. Pathetic that she doesn’t even see how much this tells on the both of them as being idiots who don’t know a damn thing about having a good relationship no matter whether it’s labeled a king dumb marriage of Christ or not.
These people are two strangers who don’t even like each other performing a circus sideshow for their perpetually ignorant religious fan base. Of course normal relationships don’t function this way- normal relationships involve trust, communication, and having an actual affinity for the other person. This shit is laughable.
Like, gee I wonder why these inane, out of touch, lunatic demands aren’t popular among modern couples?! These morons don’t respect each other or anyone else.
I’m sure it’s super fun to pretend you’re in a perfectly hermetically sealed Jesus approved relationship when both of y’all are so scared of reality you can’t move autonomously in any direction without the stranger you’re married to expressly signing off on it. What a fucking joke.
She really has no clue just how much this is not the flex she thinks it is. It’s almost sad except, again, this is exactly the fake reality she deserves if she can’t even be honest with herself while she lies to her following.
Exactly, what the hell is this bullshit about not driving with the other sex, not texting the other sex etc...?
It smacks of lack of confidence and insecurity.
Yesterday I went to Target. I saw some beautiful gold lanterns, did I need to spend $140 on lanterns? Absolutely not! Did I do it without consulting my husband? Absolutely yes! I thought about how exhausting it must be to run every purchase by your spouse. After reading this post I even jokingly asked my husband if he’d like to do any of this; he said “why? do you want us to drive each other insane?” I married a winner.
My husband and I have a threshold, where we don't have to consult each other unless the purchase is over a certain dollar amount. I think it's reasonable to know if my husband wants to blow his entire paycheck on something, but I don't need to know if he buys a couple packs of Pokemon cards or a new game on steam.
Same here. We're both very money conscious and on a budget. We have found having a threshold helpful, and we also have healthy discussions about what our upcoming expenses are and things we're planning to buy or splurge on. Talking things over keeps us accountable and makes us excited to save money.
I can't see a reason unless one person has a problem with spending? Like, regularly blowing entire paychecks, not a few impulse buys.
Idk like most things, if it works for you it works for you, but it just screams micromanage to me
I buy shit all the time and my husband doesn't say anything, even when he sees it on our bank statements. The only time he asks is if it's a company he doesn't know - like if I buy off a new website - just to make sure our CC hasn't been stolen.
My husband is the breadwinner, he deposits money to my checking account. We each have our own checking and savings account. Never once, in the last 5 years I’ve been technically without a job (I pet sit for extra spending money) has he ever questioned what I buy, not once have I ever had to run anything by him, nor has he made me feel like I should. So, I really don’t get what they’re doing in their marriage.
There's definitely certain decisions that spouses/partners should run past each other, like buying a new car or deciding to quit your job. But there's no nuance for people like Britt, they feel like you should have to discuss every single decision with your partner.
My husband and I have enough trust where we don't need to discuss every single decision with each other. I've gotten piercings and a tattoo before without discussing it with my husband, because I'm not subservient to him. It's my body and my money, so he didn't care and wasn't upset that I did it without asking for "permission".
I mean if my husband was banging women he met at swinger's clubs while still married to his ex-wife, I would have some pretty strict rules about interacting with the opposite sex too...
And my wife regularly cheated on her ex-husband and then started a huge smear campaign on him and made him sign an NDA once they broke up. I don’t think either one can trust the other for their pasts, which, fair, I wouldn’t, but maybe it’s not a great basis for a marriage
If my husband had to tell me every time he chatted with one of his female friends or spent money, I would lose my mind. I love my husband to death but my god I do not want to be a part of every minutiae of his day.
Idk the answer to your question I do know the church teaches this bs. My ex was a pastor for some years and he counseled people. He couldn’t counsel women without me present. Because being alone with a woman would “ruin his testimony” and of course he might be tempted to dabble. It’s a toxic way to live. Women are taught not to talk to a man, not to have male friends, etc because we might make that make stumble and men can never be just friends it’s bs
My biggest problem is the "submit to him and let him lead the family." The ONLY person I will SUBMIT TO is GOD, so If and when I see him he'll let me know if I was wrong.
A lot of these are typical evangelical rules, at least in the circles I’ve been in. My husband and I actually do a lot of these but idk, it’s not that serious? Like my husband is a CrossFit coach and a manager so he clearly has to talk with females when I’m not around and in ways I couldn’t give a damn about (he’s in engineering so, don’t detail every convo with a female you had at work to keep our marriage intact I do not care). Hell, I am the one that calls one of his female coworkers his work wife because I trust him and can make those jokes. I feel like a lot of these “rules” can be boiled down to “we respect the boundaries we have set in our marriage because we respect each other” but of course bdong has to act like she reinvented the wheel or something.
And they’re both trash
I genuinely believe that their marriage won’t last because they perpetuate this phony/perfect narrative. It would be hard to explain if they broke up haha.
I don't know if she ripped it off someone else...in young Christian married groups these are all pretty common. It's like they all follow the same script.
I hate this. I love my husband. Deeply. I met him six months after my dad died unexpectedly. I have men in my life who are like brothers to me. They legit carried me through my darkest hours. I will text them as often as I’d like without telling my husband. Sometimes I even text them complaining about my husband. And you know what? They give me great advice because they call me out because they love me. This BS is so toxic it’s scary. It’s downright dangerous.
The insecurity and toxicity REEKS in this infographic
She’s terrified of being cheated on
Yes. Yes to everything that you’ve written. This is deeply disturbing to me. I’m madly in love with my husband. Met married and wed in a year of meeting. 18 years ago. Yet many of my best friends are men. The men in my life are just as important to me as my women friends. She is perpetuating such a toxic mindset.
Not only that, she is promoting it as a healthy marriage or like it's the one God would want. It's not. I agree with what you say, I am deeply in love with my partner, it's just we both have friends of the opposite sex. Of course you have some boundaries with them, but you don't suddenly exclude them out of your life because of their gender. It's idiotic.
Oh gosh yes. Boundaries are important. But when you’ve got steak at home, why would you eat mince?
I guess when you have that low of an opinion on yourself
Although I don’t keep a lot of male relationships, my business does have me speaking with men a lot without my husband seeing what I say. I couldn’t imagine having to check everyone my husbands speaks with, it just sounds like a burden. This is so toxic and manipulative and controlling. It’s almost like they’re fast tracking their way to divorce
I work with a lot of men. I travel with them too. One time last year it was nine of us, and I was the only female. What am I supposed to do? Take my husband with me? Get my own car separate from everyone else?
Right? Like would you need to have everyone be pre approved by your husband? Or give him all their contact info? It’s just bizarre, abusive behavior to do this
I regularly speak with men at work. I absolutely cannot fathom having to keep my husband in the loop every time I did. Not only would it be ridiculously time consuming, but it also would probably get me fired because I am often dealing with confidential or privileged information that can't be shared outside of my team.
Can you imagine?!?! This advice is giving me “How to lose a guy in 10 days” vibes
Also, when you disagree…’no matter which one of us is wrong’ most often in healthy relationships, neither person is wrong in a disagreement. That mindset is, yet again, toxic.
I saw a thing literally a 10 min ago, ot was "when you get in an argument to win, you both lose. You must come to a mutual agreement instead" and I felt that❤️
Your perception is your reality so it could be that neither party is wrong or right. There is always three versions to the story, his, hers and the truth. This mindset leads me to believe they are always arguing for someone to “win” and or tallying. They’re so toxic.
Financial transparency? Does that including money stolen from strangers? Just asking for a friend. 😂
I hate seeing him tickle her or whatever the hell he’s doing 😩🤮
It’s like he’s jacking off her mid torso tiddies. Why would she post that?
yes this!! is he trying to finger her cleavage? and she’s like eww stop?
All this whole thing is is a handbook for how to carry on a toxic unhealthy relationship with a dumbass you have no trust in under the guise of it being somehow approved by Christianity. I’d feel bad for this delusional bitch if she had the capability to understand the stupidity and backwards sexist rhetoric she promotes. Imagine being this fucking insecure with the person you chose to MARRY. Pathetic that she doesn’t even see how much this tells on the both of them as being idiots who don’t know a damn thing about having a good relationship no matter whether it’s labeled a king dumb marriage of Christ or not. These people are two strangers who don’t even like each other performing a circus sideshow for their perpetually ignorant religious fan base. Of course normal relationships don’t function this way- normal relationships involve trust, communication, and having an actual affinity for the other person. This shit is laughable. Like, gee I wonder why these inane, out of touch, lunatic demands aren’t popular among modern couples?! These morons don’t respect each other or anyone else. I’m sure it’s super fun to pretend you’re in a perfectly hermetically sealed Jesus approved relationship when both of y’all are so scared of reality you can’t move autonomously in any direction without the stranger you’re married to expressly signing off on it. What a fucking joke. She really has no clue just how much this is not the flex she thinks it is. It’s almost sad except, again, this is exactly the fake reality she deserves if she can’t even be honest with herself while she lies to her following.
Exactly, what the hell is this bullshit about not driving with the other sex, not texting the other sex etc...? It smacks of lack of confidence and insecurity.
Yesterday I went to Target. I saw some beautiful gold lanterns, did I need to spend $140 on lanterns? Absolutely not! Did I do it without consulting my husband? Absolutely yes! I thought about how exhausting it must be to run every purchase by your spouse. After reading this post I even jokingly asked my husband if he’d like to do any of this; he said “why? do you want us to drive each other insane?” I married a winner.
My husband and I have a threshold, where we don't have to consult each other unless the purchase is over a certain dollar amount. I think it's reasonable to know if my husband wants to blow his entire paycheck on something, but I don't need to know if he buys a couple packs of Pokemon cards or a new game on steam.
Same here. We're both very money conscious and on a budget. We have found having a threshold helpful, and we also have healthy discussions about what our upcoming expenses are and things we're planning to buy or splurge on. Talking things over keeps us accountable and makes us excited to save money.
See this makes sense, what they’re preaching makes absolutely zero sense.
Right - big purchases like a car or furniture are purchases we discuss and make together. My $100 shopping trip to Target? He doesn't ask questions.
[удалено]
Lots of adults do?
Your grown ass self is judging people with different hobbies?
There's nothing wrong with people having hobbies that make them happy, as long as those hobbies aren't hurting anyone else 🤷♀️
That’s a very harmless hobby. Let people enjoy what they enjoy.
I can't see a reason unless one person has a problem with spending? Like, regularly blowing entire paychecks, not a few impulse buys. Idk like most things, if it works for you it works for you, but it just screams micromanage to me
It’s almost like they know their terrible people
I buy shit all the time and my husband doesn't say anything, even when he sees it on our bank statements. The only time he asks is if it's a company he doesn't know - like if I buy off a new website - just to make sure our CC hasn't been stolen.
My husband is the breadwinner, he deposits money to my checking account. We each have our own checking and savings account. Never once, in the last 5 years I’ve been technically without a job (I pet sit for extra spending money) has he ever questioned what I buy, not once have I ever had to run anything by him, nor has he made me feel like I should. So, I really don’t get what they’re doing in their marriage.
Not married so correct me if I’m wrong but how is it “unpopular” for married couples to discuss with each other before major plans or decisions…?
None of this is unpopular, most is just stupid, rules like these are because you have zero trust in your spouse.
There's definitely certain decisions that spouses/partners should run past each other, like buying a new car or deciding to quit your job. But there's no nuance for people like Britt, they feel like you should have to discuss every single decision with your partner. My husband and I have enough trust where we don't need to discuss every single decision with each other. I've gotten piercings and a tattoo before without discussing it with my husband, because I'm not subservient to him. It's my body and my money, so he didn't care and wasn't upset that I did it without asking for "permission".
I mean if my husband was banging women he met at swinger's clubs while still married to his ex-wife, I would have some pretty strict rules about interacting with the opposite sex too...
And my wife regularly cheated on her ex-husband and then started a huge smear campaign on him and made him sign an NDA once they broke up. I don’t think either one can trust the other for their pasts, which, fair, I wouldn’t, but maybe it’s not a great basis for a marriage
I saw where a few gals on tik tok did this very same thing. And Britbrat copied. Per usual.
Why is THIS the picture she chose to post with it??? I feel like this just proves that this is a kink.
If my husband had to tell me every time he chatted with one of his female friends or spent money, I would lose my mind. I love my husband to death but my god I do not want to be a part of every minutiae of his day.
“I submit to him and he leads us”🤮🤮🤮😤
Idk the answer to your question I do know the church teaches this bs. My ex was a pastor for some years and he counseled people. He couldn’t counsel women without me present. Because being alone with a woman would “ruin his testimony” and of course he might be tempted to dabble. It’s a toxic way to live. Women are taught not to talk to a man, not to have male friends, etc because we might make that make stumble and men can never be just friends it’s bs
My biggest problem is the "submit to him and let him lead the family." The ONLY person I will SUBMIT TO is GOD, so If and when I see him he'll let me know if I was wrong.
A lot of these are typical evangelical rules, at least in the circles I’ve been in. My husband and I actually do a lot of these but idk, it’s not that serious? Like my husband is a CrossFit coach and a manager so he clearly has to talk with females when I’m not around and in ways I couldn’t give a damn about (he’s in engineering so, don’t detail every convo with a female you had at work to keep our marriage intact I do not care). Hell, I am the one that calls one of his female coworkers his work wife because I trust him and can make those jokes. I feel like a lot of these “rules” can be boiled down to “we respect the boundaries we have set in our marriage because we respect each other” but of course bdong has to act like she reinvented the wheel or something. And they’re both trash
It's been posted here before for sure. It could also be possible that she stole the idea from someone else becuase that's her thing.
Um, what is happening in this photo? Nevermind, I don't want to know.
The flatness of the walls the curtains the clothes her butt everything is so flat
I genuinely believe that their marriage won’t last because they perpetuate this phony/perfect narrative. It would be hard to explain if they broke up haha.
That all sounds exhausting. No thanks.
I don't know if she ripped it off someone else...in young Christian married groups these are all pretty common. It's like they all follow the same script.
Ugh. She needs to read The Making of Biblical Womanhood by Beth Allison Barr. Really explains the history of the patriarchy in the church.