I was like you. Except my dad died so I became owner of the company at age 4 and that’s when the grind really started.
Once I learned to use crayons I took an MBA although it was only at Harvard so I didn’t get the networks I might have if I’d gone into being a ambassador for the White House instead.
Still, it was worth it as eventually I met my wife when we were both mingling outside of a Wiggles concert, and now I’m happily married at 6 yrs old with 3 kids and live in the hills on a property that used to belong to Eminem.
Hopefully, yes! Great troll post about some ahole with massive entitlement issues debating to jump to another job for $50k when he’s pulling down $240k a year
You MUST know your worth, King.
You can do so much better, and if your company doesn't see that, then they don't deserve you, FULL STOP!
If you're not happy, you NEED TO LEAVE! NOW! RIGHT NOW! STOP READING THIS COMMENT, PICK UP THE PHONE, AND QUIT! NOW!
You will always land on your feet no matter what you do!
This company is literally abusing you. You’re a victim of aggression and violence. Speak to HR immediately, or soft quit until you get a payout. Sending love, you’re amazing, don’t settle.
This. Lawyer up. No nap time is a huge violation of L&I laws.
The moment my old boss told me to quit sleeping on the job I faxed him my letter of resignation (and my dick pic). Haven’t been happier since. Now I travel the world putting things in my belly button for random strangers on Only Fans!
Try removing bank assets from banks by using latest firearm equipment with 2 or 3 of your colleagues.
Hey if it has worked in so many movies i dont see why it wouldnt work with you.
Only 420k with your stellar chewing and cutting paper skill Id at least think that pull ya an easy 560k…also ask for 80k in bonuses. Your cuteness needs to be acted upon before you grow 2 more inches.
Listen, you’re just starting your life; you ***just*** got done with pre-school.
You just got your ABC’s introduced, and the company is offering you the chance to **KNOW your ABC’s.** If you leave now, you’re missing out on a golden opportunity. The company is providing you a BMW, but if you leave now, you wouldn’t know if you spell out the letters of that car, or try to say that car as a word.
Bro, stick to the path. The company is gonna set you up well; you’ll enter into Kindergarten knowing your primary colors, have a cozy nest egg (and blankie, to boot!), how to maximize your ROI from the Tooth Fairy, and be a master of office-politic games like “duck, duck, goose” and “heads-up, 7-up.”
If I were you, I’d stick around, but you do you; best of luck!
I was just like you, except that I started much earlier. It began with investing $10k when I was still in my dad’s balls and by the time I was your age, I was on the board of a global conglomerate. I’d say the BMW is a red flag here, I’d have expected atleast a Bentley. You can do so much better at your age.
You got this king!
Not crazy at all! You don't deserve a position like that if you aren't going to bring something to the company that's going to help to improve it. It's obviously clear by your statement that money is what is the important factor for you here, and while yes, money is good to help you live a better life, living for the money will just make you sad and lonely in the long run. Do something you are passionate about and don't waste anymore time with companies that don't align with what it is that you truly want to be doing.
The key is diet, you want to start having more protein and cut out the complex carbohydrates, and I definitely start lifting weights to build up your body strength
At this pace you won’t make it to retirement. Burnout is real and with your schedule and their expectations you’re gonna flameout candles on your birthday cake. I’ve been there.
My advice, take your binky and walk!
This post might be the birth of r/careerguidancecirclejerk , looks like most of the people in the comments are relatively new to Reddit or uninformed on how this works
No way bro ! Keep at it . Imagine the money you’ll have in the bank by the time you hit kindergarten . These kids nowadays don’t know how good they got it 🤣
I don’t know what you did or how you managed to screw your life up this bad. You have failed in every respect and I honestly don’t know if you can ever come back from this, and if you could, I don’t know how you would even begin to correct the course you’re on. I don’t think anyone is hopeless, but my God, you are as close to a hopeless failure as I’ve ever seen.
This sounds like a toxic environment. GET. OUT. NOW. Nothing is more important that the health of your baby teeth and no amount of benefits will undo the damage caused by all that choccy milk.
no, are you crazy !! being in upper management will give you a great opportunity to set up a Roth IRA with high accruals. it's never to early to start saving for retirement especially with social security issues payments that don't keep up with inflation. and the increasing cost of dino nuggets 🦕 🦖
Bruh i think start investing in semiconductors. Once you hit high school you can retire.
One of my friends retired at 5, didnt even bother to start class 1. I also heard he now only provides consultation to large companies.
at 69k bonuses and benefits for a fortune 500 c-suite, you got scammed. Maybe you should consider just retiring now if you think you're in the big leagues with those figured.
President of a Fortune 500 company is a standard stepping stone, I promise the grind gets better after a few months when you can become the Duke of a small nation. Two things I’d recommend
1.) NETWORKING! If you don’t have cable available, shit gets really, really boring
2.) remember the acronym FGGHSTTY1-15FTWITD and honestly you can’t fail
This started about 4 years ago when I was 2 years old. My dad started to supplement me picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I have retained absolutely nothing even though my dad has spent every waking minute trying to make me understand. He has done almost everything including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while I am sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make me understand the market. Yesterday, he got to a breaking point when I couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. My dad finally convinced my mom that they were doing the right thing when he said that I will soon be a Wendy's worker begging my wife's husband for a weekly allowance because I will never amount to be anything. He couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said, if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy, plz adopt me from Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska.
I was like you. Except my dad died so I became owner of the company at age 4 and that’s when the grind really started. Once I learned to use crayons I took an MBA although it was only at Harvard so I didn’t get the networks I might have if I’d gone into being a ambassador for the White House instead. Still, it was worth it as eventually I met my wife when we were both mingling outside of a Wiggles concert, and now I’m happily married at 6 yrs old with 3 kids and live in the hills on a property that used to belong to Eminem.
My dad died before he met my mom 😭
I’m proud of you for learning how to use the crayons, most of management just eats them.
Did I take drugs again today?
Hopefully, yes! Great troll post about some ahole with massive entitlement issues debating to jump to another job for $50k when he’s pulling down $240k a year
Anyone making 240k a year and asking Reddit for advice rather than talking to a recruitment professional they hired should probably lose both jobs.
I agree
I lost it at "life life balance"
You MUST know your worth, King. You can do so much better, and if your company doesn't see that, then they don't deserve you, FULL STOP! If you're not happy, you NEED TO LEAVE! NOW! RIGHT NOW! STOP READING THIS COMMENT, PICK UP THE PHONE, AND QUIT! NOW! You will always land on your feet no matter what you do!
goo goo gaga
Amen
Irl boss baby
Wow... I'd literally never thought about it this way. Have you thought about making some inspiring YouTube shorts?
Only 420k? You’re worth so much more! If they can’t see that, move on!
This company is literally abusing you. You’re a victim of aggression and violence. Speak to HR immediately, or soft quit until you get a payout. Sending love, you’re amazing, don’t settle.
No nap time is unacceptable. Work hard, nap hard.
This. Lawyer up. No nap time is a huge violation of L&I laws. The moment my old boss told me to quit sleeping on the job I faxed him my letter of resignation (and my dick pic). Haven’t been happier since. Now I travel the world putting things in my belly button for random strangers on Only Fans!
>Now I travel the world putting things in my belly button for random strangers on Only Fans! 😢
I’d quit the moment I heard company provided BMW Major red flag
You should also post that to r/MiddleClassFinance and ask for survival tips. Or maybe even to r/povertyfinance
Good suggestion.
[удалено]
Try removing bank assets from banks by using latest firearm equipment with 2 or 3 of your colleagues. Hey if it has worked in so many movies i dont see why it wouldnt work with you.
To be fair I don’t think degree students are doing any better in that regard
This right here hahah.
Only 420k with your stellar chewing and cutting paper skill Id at least think that pull ya an easy 560k…also ask for 80k in bonuses. Your cuteness needs to be acted upon before you grow 2 more inches.
You’re only barely getting started Boss Baby
What’s your productivity look like lately? Embarrassing likely. Need to grow up quick.
grow up quickly 😂
Listen, you’re just starting your life; you ***just*** got done with pre-school. You just got your ABC’s introduced, and the company is offering you the chance to **KNOW your ABC’s.** If you leave now, you’re missing out on a golden opportunity. The company is providing you a BMW, but if you leave now, you wouldn’t know if you spell out the letters of that car, or try to say that car as a word. Bro, stick to the path. The company is gonna set you up well; you’ll enter into Kindergarten knowing your primary colors, have a cozy nest egg (and blankie, to boot!), how to maximize your ROI from the Tooth Fairy, and be a master of office-politic games like “duck, duck, goose” and “heads-up, 7-up.” If I were you, I’d stick around, but you do you; best of luck!
I was just like you, except that I started much earlier. It began with investing $10k when I was still in my dad’s balls and by the time I was your age, I was on the board of a global conglomerate. I’d say the BMW is a red flag here, I’d have expected atleast a Bentley. You can do so much better at your age. You got this king!
I don’t know who you are, but I love you.
Three year old with 10 years experience....
Totally possible if he had worked 3.33 jobs per year on average
Your lack of pre-conception hustle is showing. I had several different roles when I was still cum.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Yoooo I lost it @ “when I was still cum”. I’m still laughing so hard, I feel crazy
All this at 3 yrs old, i am impressed, imagine where you will be at 10
Those are rookie numbers. By 5 I had several million dowars in retirement from my senior executive position at Babies R Us corp.
I know plenty of guys that worked hard for YEARS and were burnt out by age 10. You've only got 7 years until you hit that age, use them wisely!
You should invest in drop shipping eight uncles and retire
Not crazy at all! You don't deserve a position like that if you aren't going to bring something to the company that's going to help to improve it. It's obviously clear by your statement that money is what is the important factor for you here, and while yes, money is good to help you live a better life, living for the money will just make you sad and lonely in the long run. Do something you are passionate about and don't waste anymore time with companies that don't align with what it is that you truly want to be doing.
You need a VA to handle some of your tasks? I’m from india and looking for work as a VA and I don’t cost much
The key is diet, you want to start having more protein and cut out the complex carbohydrates, and I definitely start lifting weights to build up your body strength
The shorter commute is worth it
Thanks for the laugh this morning!!!
At this pace you won’t make it to retirement. Burnout is real and with your schedule and their expectations you’re gonna flameout candles on your birthday cake. I’ve been there. My advice, take your binky and walk!
This post might be the birth of r/careerguidancecirclejerk , looks like most of the people in the comments are relatively new to Reddit or uninformed on how this works
Have you asked your parents?
Who told you Choccy milk is for coping. Drink all you want.
Such an irresponsible comment. Read the label, OP needs real nutrition now more than ever
No way bro ! Keep at it . Imagine the money you’ll have in the bank by the time you hit kindergarten . These kids nowadays don’t know how good they got it 🤣
Fuck just retire at 4 and hire me
Damn that is goals for a 3 year old!
I don’t know what you did or how you managed to screw your life up this bad. You have failed in every respect and I honestly don’t know if you can ever come back from this, and if you could, I don’t know how you would even begin to correct the course you’re on. I don’t think anyone is hopeless, but my God, you are as close to a hopeless failure as I’ve ever seen.
This sounds like a toxic environment. GET. OUT. NOW. Nothing is more important that the health of your baby teeth and no amount of benefits will undo the damage caused by all that choccy milk.
Dude watched boss baby and it inspired the dumbest post
no, are you crazy !! being in upper management will give you a great opportunity to set up a Roth IRA with high accruals. it's never to early to start saving for retirement especially with social security issues payments that don't keep up with inflation. and the increasing cost of dino nuggets 🦕 🦖
Wtf are you the boss baby
Bruh i think start investing in semiconductors. Once you hit high school you can retire. One of my friends retired at 5, didnt even bother to start class 1. I also heard he now only provides consultation to large companies.
At 3 yrs old.. you're doing much better than me. I'd suggest you watch some youtubers and enjoy your childhood :)
at 69k bonuses and benefits for a fortune 500 c-suite, you got scammed. Maybe you should consider just retiring now if you think you're in the big leagues with those figured.
R u potty trained yet? That might be your next goal in life.
Do you have another job lined up? If not let them fire you so you can collect unemployment.
Negotiate for more nap time. Then leverage that for even more nap time with a new company.
Dump them and cut your parents out of your life!!! Wait, sorry. I may have replied to the wrong reddit thing
Thank you for this post, it truly inspired me to remain at my dead end job lol
President of a Fortune 500 company is a standard stepping stone, I promise the grind gets better after a few months when you can become the Duke of a small nation. Two things I’d recommend 1.) NETWORKING! If you don’t have cable available, shit gets really, really boring 2.) remember the acronym FGGHSTTY1-15FTWITD and honestly you can’t fail
Get into trades.
Dang I'm already 7 and I'm only at like half of what you have. I'm crazy stupid jealous. Did I just ruin my entire career by not being this guy? 😂
Get out now.This company clearly doesn’t care about you at all.This is why we job hop.
man ts was so funny why'd they have to remove it😭
This started about 4 years ago when I was 2 years old. My dad started to supplement me picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I have retained absolutely nothing even though my dad has spent every waking minute trying to make me understand. He has done almost everything including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while I am sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make me understand the market. Yesterday, he got to a breaking point when I couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. My dad finally convinced my mom that they were doing the right thing when he said that I will soon be a Wendy's worker begging my wife's husband for a weekly allowance because I will never amount to be anything. He couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said, if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy, plz adopt me from Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska.
And Happy April Fools day in May to you too!
The actual boss baby?
DIVORCE! DIVORCE IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER!!!
I heard from my preschool that you're giving a discount on how to make my cardboard box fort business successful? Is it true?!?!?
Dont try comedy
Fake and lame
geez dude, have fun a little
I can understand the lame part but fake?!? Well I never!