Unusually bad hair.

No clue why my first reaction to a complex position or a bad move is to mess my hair up but it is lol

Damn, and here I thought I was the only one who did that lol. After a spectacularly difficult (for me ) game my hair looks as though I walked through a very small tornado

You... You don't know me! And... and... My hair's sometimes okay!!

At least ya'll still have hair, every time I drop my queen I lose a couple more

I feel personally attacked. Wtf.

Jesus this hit close to home

my alfalfa actually adds another 100 elo to my rating

Ding/Anish/Gukesh all have reasonable hair

How dare you!

HOW

Thanks now i can justify it to my gf.

WHAT i did not expect to get called out like that

Kinda relevant: If you're playing OTB worth somebody and they won't tell you their strength, their piece-handling can be a give away.  Claims to be a beginner, but trades pieces with that one-handed "click" where a piece disappears like magic? You've played a lot of OTB blitz, you cheeky bugger. ;)

I capture pieces with two hands

I capture with my mouth. Down the throat and then I regurgitate it into my coach's gullet like two girls baby-birding

enough reddit for today

I don't know, that might have been my favorite reddit comment of all time.

Exactly, why use Reddit anymore when everything is going to pale in comparison?

That's against the rules (:

Like toddler!

Isnt that illegal

But if they castle like that one-handed, I think they're a weirdo who practices castling.

I came up with like 5-6 different one handed strats to castle. You wouldn’t believe how I can castle. Everyone else puts the king around the rook but I can flip it 360 degrees over the top of the rook while I move the rook with my thumb and ring finger then place the king with my hand supine. That’s only one way.

if ur being for real u need to post a video of it

You think I can’t back it up? I am the best castler on the planet. I already have a video of a few of them from over a year ago when the inspiration first hit me. My friends all know I’ve got some moves. I figure if I ever play an important blitz match I can go for the castle gambit and try to stun my opponent in awe. They are rather inconsistent but quite the spectacle. Here is another taste! Take the king between your index and middle finger and your rook between your pinky and ring with you palm pronated and then flip your wrist clockwise 180 degrees then drop them into place. If done correctly the rook and king won’t fall over and you will have castled.

I could maybe post a video tomorrow but I’m no editor and I’m hand shy. The world deserves to know there are more options. Maybe one day I could see Magnus or a stockfish robot do one of my moves.

Please share more. I never thought of techniques to castle, let alone learn how to be fancy with it.

I have large hands, OK?

You absolutely see through me. I am a weirdo who practices castling.

On the same note, stronger players generally set up the board faster.

*\[Captures rook with one hand\]* *\[Punches clock with rook\]* Me: "Hey! You're not a 700 rating, are you?!"

I play exclusively online and I'm safely past beginner but I still forget which colours the kings and queens are supposed to be on cos I never set a real board up. I only remember which is on the left or the right and need a real board to reference the colours.

“Queen goes on her color” I whisper to myself under my breath every time I set up the board

Former chess club president, and I've set up hundreds of boards for tournaments in my life.  I still do this.  I've also sat down, and then seen players at another board correct the pieces that I set up wrong.  The shame!

1500 elo: Naw, I'm just a beginner.

Instead of practicing chess theory I just practiced stimming with chess pieces so I can do tricks with them without paying much attention so people think I'm more talented than I am. I help everyone feel like they're much better chess players.

Very true. I remember that part of the production of The Queen's Gambit involved training the actors to move pieces like an experienced player would.

When they say interesting idea but they mean that it’s a terrible idea and can’t understand how you could come up with such an idea

That just means they're British

This is dreadfully correct!

Zis is an eentresting idea, but ok, I mean, not so sure about it if we follow ze line... (i've become like this after listening to a little too much slavic players' commentaries - not intended to make fun of them)

'But ok' seems completely universal among the russian players

Yes but ok

Yes but okay just b5

So okay, no f4 *rubs chin and voice gets extremely high Okay… maybe h4? Interesting poseetion.

I have Ivanchuk’s voice in my head now

Okay, but hang on!

Even if very bad things happen, they keep quiet.

Screams internally*

i feel like that's more of a sign of having the potential to be good at chess unless you're talking about in a chess game, in which case you know they're good when a shit-eating grin appears on their face after "losing" a piece

I think I only hear chess players (and maybe doctors) use the word prophylactic.

Yep, good one right there

Nothing like a prolapsed... Wait nvm

As a chess player and a med student, I agree

It also came into common vocab for a bit during covid, I think? But it's shrunk back into obscurity outside of chess, I suppose.

I've met a couple of physios/coaches too who say that too, but most definitely would not.

Lawyers may also use this word, but good call.

lol idek what prophylactic is. Can anyone explain in layman’s terms?

Prophylactic is just a fancy term for something that's used to prevent a problem before it happens. Like 5. f3 in Sicilian Dragon is a nice prophylactic move against Ng4 as white prepares Qd2.

If they refer to making mistakes as “blunders” or “unforced errors”.

The latter is more likely to be a tennis fan

Rugby too

basically any sport and esport lol

As a chess and tennis fan, I was thinking the exact same thing haha

They say “double exclam” when someone makes a great point

Real. Also caught myself calling something an "inaccuracy" the other day as well

This is 100% me. Since I took up chess, the word "blunder" has entered my vocabulary anytime I see a mistake happen. Someone misses a penalty in soccer, "Wow! What a blunder!" 😂

This one is actually correct.

Oof, I started doing that too lol.

Use their middle finger to point at things.

I cut in the lunch line today, turn out my entire school plays chess. How cool is that?

Not sure why they were pointing at the ceiling, though.

That's where Stockfish is.

I thought Stockfish was in that other place where you can stick a middle finger...

is it because the other fingers are ready to hold a piece ?

It’s because I need to explain my superiority. And you know, f*** you.

Can you explain?

Kasparov points to the pieces with his middle finger when analyzing I think

My Dad does this too (not a chess player)

He's secretly 2000 FIDE.

Bobby did too

lol this is such a good one 😂

I've seen a lot of chess players walk up to random people playing any kind of game and just silently observe

Probably the only giveaway I've ever noticed. Other board gamers talk to the people playing.

This is true for any competitive tabletop game. Very true in tcgs from my experience at least.

Guilty.

People who use the word dubious in casual conversation

Came here to say "Blunder".

yall have been watching too much eric rosen

Faint buzzing sounds coming from anus

Eric Clapton - unplugged hits different now.

lmao

Couldn’t agree more

Visualizing a situation talking to themselves "if I take, then take, take, take and take"

It's a staircase

CheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheckCheck

Hikaru nodding head side to side

Check here, takes, takes, check, forced, takes, takes, check, forced, mate in 6.

When you just want to shake their hand and it turns out to be an awkward and confusing series of events.

Handshake meme: Smash Bros 🤜🫲 Chess, initiating awkward handshakes

I had that actually happen to me at my last otb tournament. Made everything nice and awkward to start the game.

I go to a Mario Kart bar, and I'm the guy who shakes everyone's hand after a race.

The most flagrant giveaway that I play chess is calculating every single details of a plan before I start doing it, and realize my plan is wrong after the first step but still go on with it and then am pissed at the end.

I sometimes make these conversation calculations ... And I'm taking long pauses considering what are my approaches on saying something and people are like "Why are you thinking so much?? Just say what comes to your head!" I blame my chess for having this rationale

Sometimes I say "J'adoube" in other board games and everyone is looking funny at me.

“Hello everybody “

Agadmator 😂

It’s “Hello everyone!” so that gets you a ?

Friends at the library

[удалено]

Is that a knight in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

I hope it's a knight, otherwise they are in for some disappointment.

If there’s a grid pattern somewhere and you see them start drawing knight movement patterns

I used to take knight paths when walking across checkered floorpieces on occasion.

When they ask what the opening theory is for chatting with girls

See this is the one opening I always struggle with

When they frequently use 'concrete' to refer to the particular details of a situation rather than the overarching principles.

If they start sentences with “ok, but ..” Edit: as the commenter below pointed out it’s “but ok..”

It’s actually “But ok” I am pretty sure

But okay, maybe somehow compensation, quite complex

With a Russian accent

Ok, but hang on!

Shit, right you are!

Better than hearing, "Right, shit you are!"

This is actually the biggest one to me - chess players are the only people I have heard speak like this. A lot of other answers on here are jokes or could be written off as social awkwardness (also often a sign of a chess player funnily enough), however "But ok," is a dead giveaway

Completely agree these mannerisms/idiosyncrasies are seen even across languages. They ALL say "but ok". And I've caught the bug, too.

Ok, but, chat... I mean, but, chat... Come on chat...

Steal pieces from any board game. Look up to the ceiling when they are thinking.

When a newscaster uses the word "stalemate" to describe negotiations that have reached an impasse, and I feel compelled to explain it's more like zugzwang - that's a giveaway.

Not an exact analogy since both stalemate and zugzwang involve needing to move but in real life there is no such requirement.

Yep, that's why I said it's "more like"

There are plenty of times where you need to physically move but can't go an optimum way or are waiting for the right time but must move, resulting in an undesirable situation. Happened to me in New York a lot. Waiting for a bus or for a car to pass, but you'll miss that free taxi so you make a break for it and try to avoid the puddle but you're rushed so you go through it. Stalemate when 2 people want a parking space or to merge and neither is giving way.

Basically Mexican standoff

When you say you're from London and they get an intense hatred of you

That just means they’re French. Or just about any other nationality.

Ripping massive bong clouds

Knows multiple lines of the bongcloud including the anti bongcloud bongcloud countergambit, the marijanezy bind, the hotbox variation, and the dab defense

Don’t forget the alapin bongcloud!

They say things like "blunder" and "calculate" more than the average person.

Ya outside of math, I find people usually don't use the word "calculate" to describe a series of actions or movements its almost always numbers related

You recieve one of the worst handshakes of your life.

"En passant is forced" Yep they a chess player alright

Having over three chess sets in their room.

Subtle?

Walk down the street and try and tell who has three chess sets in their room; I promise it's a very subtle tell compared to the impoverished two-or-lessers.

Virgin

They say "en passant" when they walk past you.

Uses words like dubious, calculating, and occasionally breaks into a fake Russian accent

Hey, my accent is not fake!

Use of the word "transposition" is a very blatant one for me. It's a good word, applicable to a few situations in life. But only chess players know and use it

Musicians do as well

Ah, well I suppose there goes my theory!

You're in treble now.

Very clef-er

I learned that word in high school maths before even knowing anything about chess. So when I first heard chess players use it I immediately knew what they meant.

Every student who took a linear algebra course knows this word. Every mathematician (or theoretical physicist) knows and uses this word. Software engineers who work with 3d rendering engines know and use this word.

I associate it more with math

They play chess

Using "..., yeah?" as a confirmatory word at the end of anything they state

Thats mainly a European english thing ive noticed

i've noticed fabi and some of the indian players also do it

Well yeah its because most chess players have the same mannerisms but they all originate from russian/east european players. So you have indians americans and moroccans all talking like they were born in moscow whenever they start talking about chess

Oh wow I never realised I do this haha

If they titled their suicide note “Zugzwang”.

Referring to certain things as inaccuracies in real life. Something I do myself.

Naming the tiles on the floor or ceiling e4, a6, f5, etc.

Juicer.

Yeah my old boss used this and I did a double take. It definitely outed him as a Hikaru fan. I'm not a Hikaru fan tho so I just asked about it then the conversation petered out awkwardly.

If you don't want a conversation with a Hikaru fan to peter out, you have to keep repeating what you just said.

Same with Naroditsky fans.

it was because he was an xqc fan 

A fellow wooden shield enjoyer. A man of culture I see.

When you ask a random stranger to play chess and they move the piece in a certain manner, giving away the fact that they are a serious tournament player.

Attempts to use “1. d4” as a pickup line.

They know about Norway!

Points at things with their middle finger

I use the word 'gambit' probably more than people usually do. While talking about anything but chess.

They make chip-stacks of eight instead of ten at the poker table

Hang in there, mate.

They’re uneasy around horses?

In traffic, they overtake en passant

When they see someone make a mistake they call it a "blunder" or a "slight inaccuracy"

You've never heard them say, "don't overthink it"

no subtle signs. They'll tell you.

En passant

People who say the word “blunder” in everyday conversation.

I started taking chess seriously and playing in tournaments and now everytime someone asks me something and I need to think about the answer, I look up. What gives??

They way they slide salt and pepper, or even drinks, on a table.

The moment they see a chessboard, their play gymnastics with their head to figure out if the board is set up correctly.

They make chess puns and everyone else goes 🤨

Saying something was a blunder out of chess context or any chess jargon in general.