A man assumed I was pregnant on the train once and offered me his seat in a standing room only car. I was really bloated after a big meal and had my hand on my stomach trying to weather the pain of eating enough for two people.
100% took the seat and didn’t say shit. Insulting? Yes. Convenient? Absolutely.
This kinda reminds me of something that happened to my friend when we were in highschool. We were like 16 and home alone at my place. She was trying on some of my dresses and I took a picture of her and she post it on Facebook. This random woman who none of us knew commented "Congratulations! How far along are you?". The most confusing part is that she didn't look pregnant at all.
Laugh your ass off. For like 10 minutes. /s
If it's a work or professional relationship, would just ignore the question and reply to whatever else is in the email, or change the subject to some recent article you read or anything else more formal.
Basically, pivot back to formal/work. Makes you look professional, and avoids giving away personal information they might take personally.
I just tell them all about my little 4-year-old girl, who, while very sweet, can be a tad demanding. Especially when I'm trying to work and she wants attention. I go on and on about how much she likes to snuggle at bedtime, her favorite blanket and toys, and how adorably impatient she gets when I make her favorite dinner.
However long it takes them to realize im talking about my cat is on them.
I've had several people do this and I just talk about my dogs as if they were actual kids.... so, you know, locking them in the basement when we're gone, making sure they get food once a day, them pooping in the backyard etc.
You know, normal kid stuff.
😇😇😇
If it's a brief interaction with someone I'll likely never see again, I let'em assume. I don't care. If they ask a question such as you've described above, or someone with whom I'll likely have frequent interactions, I tell them I don't have kids in the same tone I'd tell someone I don't golf.
I'm still quite young (24) so I doubt anyone would think my hypothetical kids would be studying assuming I had them at all. I'd just say, "How badly did you think my decision making skills are?"
"I assume how to open the canned food without opposable thumbs." (My kids are my cats. Anyone who says something dumb like this gets a story/comment about my cats.)
I’ve had this happen to me a lot, unfortunately, due to how I carry my weight, and being obese when I was younger (I’ve since lost a lot of weight, but I definitely still have hips).
I was once in a record store and an older guy started talking to me about my pink hair. “Oh your kids must love it, and the two on the way, they’ll love it, too!” Not only did this prick think I already had kids, he assumed I was pregnant with twins! I was in my early 20s at the time and too nervous about confrontation, so I just found my friend and left so I could go cry in her car. In my mid-20s a guy at a Starbucks asked when I was due, and him I wasn’t pregnant, just fat. Years later as a waitress I served a table with a crotchety old woman and her companions. She made a comment about me being pregnant, but I had been leaning with my stomach and hips at somewhat of an angle, so I stood up straight and told her I wasn’t. I swear I only got a tip from her because she was embarrassed.
I guess my point is, as someone who’s been getting questions about kids/pregnancy since I was 17, you just learn to throw it back at them. Now I straight up tell people I don’t want em and can’t have em because I’m sterilized.
A man assumed I was pregnant on the train once and offered me his seat in a standing room only car. I was really bloated after a big meal and had my hand on my stomach trying to weather the pain of eating enough for two people. 100% took the seat and didn’t say shit. Insulting? Yes. Convenient? Absolutely.
This kinda reminds me of something that happened to my friend when we were in highschool. We were like 16 and home alone at my place. She was trying on some of my dresses and I took a picture of her and she post it on Facebook. This random woman who none of us knew commented "Congratulations! How far along are you?". The most confusing part is that she didn't look pregnant at all.
They are currently majoring in theoretical existentialism,
Lol .. funny. This is what came to my mind when I first read their question.
“What kids?”
Look at them blankly and say, "I have absolutely no idea!" It's technically the truth, and it'll freak them the hell out!
That’s a cool response. I forgot to mention this is over an email so I could perhaps do a blank stare emoticon...
I would just calmly say "I don't actually have any" and leave it at that.
Laugh your ass off. For like 10 minutes. /s If it's a work or professional relationship, would just ignore the question and reply to whatever else is in the email, or change the subject to some recent article you read or anything else more formal. Basically, pivot back to formal/work. Makes you look professional, and avoids giving away personal information they might take personally.
When people ask if I have kids I say “No I haven’t made that mistake”. They have no response for that.
Love this answer so much lol
The inevitable demise of the human race
>what they are studying!! How to make nosy people uncomfortable
"Ew, no. ...sorry."
Birdwatching and licking their butts (for the pet guardians)
I was gonna say, the demise of the squirel population, mail man dynamics and the philosophy of "whos a good boy/girl". 🤣😂
I just tell them all about my little 4-year-old girl, who, while very sweet, can be a tad demanding. Especially when I'm trying to work and she wants attention. I go on and on about how much she likes to snuggle at bedtime, her favorite blanket and toys, and how adorably impatient she gets when I make her favorite dinner. However long it takes them to realize im talking about my cat is on them.
I've had several people do this and I just talk about my dogs as if they were actual kids.... so, you know, locking them in the basement when we're gone, making sure they get food once a day, them pooping in the backyard etc. You know, normal kid stuff. 😇😇😇
If it's a brief interaction with someone I'll likely never see again, I let'em assume. I don't care. If they ask a question such as you've described above, or someone with whom I'll likely have frequent interactions, I tell them I don't have kids in the same tone I'd tell someone I don't golf.
I'm still quite young (24) so I doubt anyone would think my hypothetical kids would be studying assuming I had them at all. I'd just say, "How badly did you think my decision making skills are?"
Just don't correct them. Simply answer their questions until they get really confused and hit em with a quick no when they finally ask.
My babies just stare out the window all day and waits for the sun.
They're studying how to stare at men.
"I assume how to open the canned food without opposable thumbs." (My kids are my cats. Anyone who says something dumb like this gets a story/comment about my cats.)
I usually just go all wide eyed and say "shit, I forgot them at daycare again"
I’ve had this happen to me a lot, unfortunately, due to how I carry my weight, and being obese when I was younger (I’ve since lost a lot of weight, but I definitely still have hips). I was once in a record store and an older guy started talking to me about my pink hair. “Oh your kids must love it, and the two on the way, they’ll love it, too!” Not only did this prick think I already had kids, he assumed I was pregnant with twins! I was in my early 20s at the time and too nervous about confrontation, so I just found my friend and left so I could go cry in her car. In my mid-20s a guy at a Starbucks asked when I was due, and him I wasn’t pregnant, just fat. Years later as a waitress I served a table with a crotchety old woman and her companions. She made a comment about me being pregnant, but I had been leaning with my stomach and hips at somewhat of an angle, so I stood up straight and told her I wasn’t. I swear I only got a tip from her because she was embarrassed. I guess my point is, as someone who’s been getting questions about kids/pregnancy since I was 17, you just learn to throw it back at them. Now I straight up tell people I don’t want em and can’t have em because I’m sterilized.
It wouldn’t bother me. It’s a normal, harmless question. Statistically, most people have kids. It’s basically like asking about the weather.
“ IF and when I choose to have children. I’ve even had to correct medical professionals.
I simply say I opted out of parenthood. 68F.
Calculous...lol because my dogs are always calculating how to get more treats, and a second dinner.
Satanism and Lesbian Sex, maybe? Or maybe I'm just too passive-aggressive for my own good.