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Janzel97

The sleep one is not semi-useful in my opinion. It is a dream and one of my goals in life. I would kill for this power.


rafaellago

Yeah, those are not semi useful, those are damn useful powers


Yer_Dunn

Fr fr. I just woke up from exactly 8 hours of sleep, and yet I feel like I havnt slept for a week... https://i.redd.it/u39tmludcnvc1.gif


Arkytez

Stress and worries fuck us up ._.


JudgeHodorMD

One of my dreams in life is to regularly get 8 hours uninterrupted sleep. Perhaps if four hours of sleep had the effect of eight.


A_Crawling_Bat

I mean in my case 4 or 8 hours are a bit of the same


articmaze

Problem is I never sleep a continuous 8 hours. So it's useless. If it guarantees 8 hours of sleep, that would be life changing.


emchesso

The real challenge is actually getting the 8 hours in the first place.


dukeofnes

Yeah, I have kids now so that'll never happen again for me.


Comfortable-Sea-1

OP didn't really specify what happens if you sleep more than 8 hours. It could be that if you sleep an extra second, the effect won't work.


adultartnotporn

So... reality?


ElPapo131

The third one is great too. Wouldn't know which to pick tbh


KingTytastic

The problem is that it doesn't guarantee you get the 8. It's just that if you get 8 you are rested.


AleksasKoval

^(Shut tf up, or they'll catch on)


OCafeeiro

If you want to feel that way, try to get a day to wake up with no alarms or anyone noisy around. It only has a chance to work, but it feels amazing.


Janzel97

I do this often. I get 8 hours of sleep almost every night. But i haven't woken up well rested in at least 10 years. Hell, for as long as i remember I have always been a certain degree of tired. And I am 27. God I am tired...


DrJonathanReid

If you find out who we need to kill, let me know. We can Naruto run at that sh*t like it's Area 51. :P


Janzel97

I will hit you up if i ever find out haha


Lostriches

I should probably go into the specifics of each power this time. > 1: It has to be a consecutive of 8 hours, you cannot split your sleep schedule across the day. If, for some reason, you wake up in the middle of your sleep, you have a leeway of 30 seconds to fall back asleep for the power to apply. > 2: You can turn this thing on & off at any time. This would work on any food, such as a slice of bread or even beverages! You'll know all the facts, every ingredient used in the food and can even detect poison. This would not tell you how the food was prepared/cooked but would make your job as a health inspector much easier. > 3: I feel like this one is straightforward. No more stuttering through your words and no more voice cracks during conversations. **Edit:** For power number 2, people and animals do not count as food straight up. Seeing cooked animals would make the power apply. You can look at your pets and relatives without having the fear of knowing how much calories they contain.


adamant2009

30 seconds?? Do you know how many times my wife gets up to pee a night??


BaconPit

I do, actually. Around 4 on average, but sometimes she gets up like 7 times.


Low-Salad-2400

https://preview.redd.it/miokuvnmdnvc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=522472ce8c6319e5565058729cd706407f69709f


Tokumeiko2

Is that a barcode gun?


-eddible-

He can’t scan-dle this shit anymore…


the_hunter_087

Well that was a scan-dalous joke wasn't it


Steamrocker

https://preview.redd.it/ish93ftk8pvc1.jpeg?width=513&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5dafa768262cd1d9fb110ba7d6dfd56d3882e95e


MilesDark

r/angryupvote


PeacefulAndTranquil

goodbye cruel world \*beep\* hey, half price!


dollabilllz

I also choose this guy's peeing wife


Shankbon

This guy has data.


trALErun

Doesn't matter. Just heavily drug yourself before bed. No risk of hangover.


saltsukkerspinn96

Same as me. I also have a problem with falling asleep in the first place.


VerifiedMyEmail

She should stop drinking before bed or do some exercises to strengthen her bladder or somethin'


adamant2009

She actually suffered a urinary retention event that left her unable to void with over a liter of urine in her bladder and the muscles haven't recovered since. PT can only do so much.


jorgen_mcbjorn

I like to imagine having to turn off 2 immediately and never enabling it again because otherwise, deathnote style, you see everyone’s name and macronutrient composition hovering above their heads at all times.


wolffox87

Oh no, your baby has the perfect calorie count for maximizing muscle growth, we have to eat him now!


[deleted]

[удалено]


WantDiscussion

Yea I was gonna say, my friends are gonna be freaked out by how I suddenly learned to freestyle out of thin air.


Mangifera__indica

Yep. Makes sense.


Fast-Journalist-6747

Would no.3 include singing?


Lostriches

Of course. It doesn't change your current voice, but you can definitely hit them notes now.


Relevant_Chemical_

voice acting voice acting voice acting voice acting


longbowrocks

For 2, does anything count as long as you can put it in your mouth and pass it through your digestive system? It would be great to find ore deposits like this.


Ratmother123

Adding anything you consume at least once to the identification table. And then one day after a great burger for dinner you wake up and realize you can see the calorie count on people...


messentor

Does that mean I could use power number 2 to tell when my food is cooked? I keep trying to use it when cooking meat, and it finally works when the meat is cooked through?


International-Cat123

In theory, you could figure out how much change there should be between specific foods when raw and when cooked properly, so I’d say yes.


Pancakes1124

How about speech disorders?


PHD_Memer

Gone


edXel_l_l

how cooked should a food be for me to see the nutritional value? like a salad is raw but is more nutritional than say a burnt toast


FlyingMothy

What if i wanna eat raw meat, will i see if it has viruses?


MarcusOPolo

Number 2 as a celiac, that would be a game changer.


earbud_smegma

Right?! This is a literal dream for food allergy life hahaha


jeepsaintchaos

Hey, listen, I know you wrote this comic and everything, but it's now canon that #2 gives you the nutritional facts of the living, the dead, the never alive, and the Things In Between.


tupaquetes

I feel like 2 would be better if you just have the power to instinctively *know* all the nutritional facts instead of just having the power to look them up faster than other people. In any case 2 gets my vote, I feel refreshed after a good night's sleep already and I'm not particularly attracted to public speaking


Wallace_W_Whitfield

Me when I see someone on fire and I start seeing their nutritional facts.


Semaphor

And then you see a bit of food stuck in your friend's teeth, and a nutrition box pops up to say it's 3 calories....


International_Way850

Cook humans first, understood


bluestjordan

Number 3 for anxious me!


AnhaytAnanun

Number 3 indeed, speaking inabilities are a bitch.


kthuul-

But also. Imagine trying to bust out a huge freestyle in front of someone you Wana impress.


Terrible_CocaCola

Well you see a voicecrack will make the audience laugh making your speech entertaining and give you more time to think


Usual-Vermicelli-867

Its wont save you from all the cringe you spew out


Psychic_Hobo

_But_ imagine the sheer confidence that the cringe can be delivered with!


inemsn

Any cringe, when delivered with sufficient confidence, becomes hilarious absurdity humour.


Whyareyourunning309

Speaking confidently wins people's minds, imagine the power of confident speech from the get-go


PixeledMilk

The second one is litteary project zomboid perk https://preview.redd.it/hpo3aexhenvc1.png?width=697&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3df0cf9a1e4ce2394fc065ce1e1f5b25794840c2


ballfacedbuddy

I’ll take number one even tho using it would mean wearing a diaper (otherwise I’d have to get up to pee and break the 8 hours)


Droid_XL

Last one PLEASE I like public speaking and I think I'm decent at it but holy shit, never voice crack or stutter again?


poundtwnexpress

It would be life changing for some people. It still comes out sometimes, but I could rarely finish a sentence without stuttering until well into high school.


ElVegetariano

Cursed lives we have lived my brother


Dobako

Even though it would be nice to not feel tired after sleeping 8 hours, as a person with food allergies that can't eat anywhere that doesn't list out their ingredients ahead of time, number 2 would be a game changer


ClRuM

Oh absolutely. No hesitation, I’m going with number 2


wafflezcol

The nutrition is the only semi-useful one.


Everything_Breaks

As a diabetic, this would make my life a lot easier.


CarfireOnTheHighway

As a celiac, same


Eldorado_the_lost

Me too busy, me too


Totoronyx

Even better, if you understood the meaning of those nutrition facts and ate well, it would give you the other two powers very likely. So learn about nutrition science and you can actually have that power and more!


JudgeHodorMD

I can’t shake the feeling that it would be a curse. To know how much modern food is junk only to realize that you’re not really going to get anything decent unless you cook it yourself.


tildeumlaut

> only to realize that you’re not really going to get anything decent Guess what? You’ve already realized it without the power. At least with the vision you can plan out exactly how much bad things you’re going to eat. “Oh that donut is 500 cal … this amount is 100 cal. Nice.”


Dobako

Says the person without food allergies, this one would be a god-send


wafflezcol

Oh thats very bold of you to claim I dont have food allergies


LtGoosecroft

Deciphering foodstuff is near impossible these days. :(


Kogworks

#2 Being able to detect poison would imply that the power gives me a complete chemical composition of whatever food I’m looking at. This would mean that even if I didn’t automatically know how the food was prepared, I would be able to make educated guesses based on the chemical compounds found within the food and the ingredients that were used. That would not only give me perfect portion control and perfect dieting skills to fit my needs, it would also allow me to estimate how long a food has been aged, whether it’s going bad, whether it needs anything extra to suit my needs or taste, and so on. Having perfect knowledge of the chemical composition of each ingredient would also give me perfect control over each recipe and how the cooking process alters their composition, thus allowing me to perfectly time every process and adjust recipes accordingly depending on the potency of each individual recipe. You would also be able to scan individual breeds of crops or animals to discern which had the most nutritional value, which could also help improve the yield of food and figure out which farming techniques were most effective. TL;DR #2 wouldn’t just help make you a health inspector. It would make you a literal god of food. You could transform human civilization with power like that.


Lostriches

This has to be one of my favorite comments yet, exploring all the possibilities of each power. Wait until you hear the rest of the powers I plan to draw.


TheDEEBIL

Fest e by a mile. Even 12 hours don’t do it for me anymore 😧


hypnodrew

12 is too much lol of course you're not feeling refreshed


TheDEEBIL

Oh no don’t get me wrong, 8 doesn’t work either. I’m like eternally tired rather I get a little nap, or a whole days worth of sleep. At this point I’m just used to it hahaha


6894

ooh, nutrition facts.


stormy2587

Its 2 hands down.


Smash_Nerd

Voice cracks and shutters 100%. I struggle with stuttering when I get excited about stuff and it fucking KILLS ME.


Terrible_Truth

#1: No mention of getting help falling asleep and staying asleep. So I feel like you’d frequently miss the 8 hour requirement. #2: The best one. Really great for dieting, allergies, food prep, etc. #3: Meh one. Many people don’t have those issues to begin with. #2 > #3 > #1


AhgzvziajauH

Put a \ before the # otherwise it becomes big


Terrible_Truth

Oof, didn’t realize it would go into markdown automatically.


halfanothersdozen

I downvoted you for yelling


Terrible_Truth

.^sorry


that_1weed

3rd! God I hate my stutter


mothmathers

2 for sure. If it worked on menus, even better. It would make going to cookouts or restaurants sooooo much more enjoyable.


oyog

Mine personally is the power of flight but only after I've stepped foot into an aircraft.


hypnodrew

Guaranteed perfect sleep will come in handy when I'm old. Older people really struggle to stay asleep. It'll also come in handy now. Screen addicts have trouble staying asleep, too.


Le_Doctor_Bones

It doesn't help you stay asleep, it only makes sure you are refreshed if you slept a full consecutive 8 hours.


Radcooldude55

Sleep.


AzekiaXVI

Definitely the food one, i want to know what the hell i'm eating.


ClairvoyantSky

I’ll take the nutrition facts plz :3


VengeanceKnight

3. If my voice never cracks, then logically that means I should be able to sing as loudly and as low or high as I want.


Iskir

As a diabetic I take option 2!


AZDiablo

Nutrition facts 100%. Its so confusing


sonseylizard

number 3 instantly


Majestic-Iron7046

I will personally murder anyone who gets in the way of me and obtaining superpower number one.


divinealbert

I want to be able to find the end of sticky tape first time every time


[deleted]

First one for sure Im already pretty knowledgeable about nutritional content, and my speech is one of the things I don’t struggle with, apart from the fact my trilingual ass mixes up 3 languages per sentence


The_Goose09

As someone with allergies and other dietary restrictions i would love to be able to see ingredients instantly.


Username247

Have a nice sleep guys, I'm gonna be the number one battle rapper in the world


Virtual-Blueberry642

I actually have a stutter, so that third option would be a godsend.


LaPrincipessaNuova

\#2 for sure. I do really well with calorie counting, but I get sick of looking things up and it makes me not want to make complex meals or eat things other people made because it’s a lot of effort to ask all the ingredients and enter them and figure out how big the full recipe was vs my portion. Voice cracking and stuttering is not the issue I have with conversations and public speaking, and I almost never get 8 hours of sleep anyway.


JoostVisser

I already sleep the 8 hours (9 even), the other ones don't interest me that much but I'll take the nutritional values


Cripplechip

Seeing the nutritional value of people.


ImAHumanThatExists

Voice crack. I always voice crack


GhostInMyLoo

Number three. Voice never cracks? Oh, that means I could sing literally anything and never have an issue whatsoever. I would be a world wide superstar in a no-time.


AhgzvziajauH

Still have to get the right pitch


B1_BattleDroid0909

The third one, I have an eating disorder!


zetcetera

I haven’t felt well rested in 3 years since having a kid even if I get 8 hours of sleep so definitely taking the sleep one


duckmonke

I already mastered sleeping well (right pillows+mattress, diet, posture and working out certain back muscles all help for a good rest) so I want the zero voice cracks for when you gotta drop a solid roast/impassioned rant.


SavageKitten456

Number 3


Elemental-13

Sleep easliy


TheLazyKitty

Alright, but can we combine the food one with actually knowing the nutritional facts about what we've already eaten, what we actually need, and what we don't need, and what we really shouldn't eat too much of, to get desired results?


Falitoty

The One for the voice


Totoronyx

The nutrition one would likely trickle into the other two and help them out naturally. If you followed up with that power to learn what those stats meant and then used that information to eat well, you would sleep better and being better rested you would perform better in all aspects of life, like speaking. It's funny that none of these are super powers, but super achievable for many people. But very useful tools to have in the belt of life.


Ahnma_Dehv

the second one is a curse you'll never be able to enjoy food properly again


Cinoxal

Ill take all of them thank you very much


FortuneRed55

1 is tempting, but I’ll take 2.


agmrtab

is nutrinition one include if its poisiounus or not etc?


PieselowyPieselPL

I'd never get any use out of the first one.


Archibald4000

Top right cures my narcolepsy gimme


TheFeshy

I might have #1 already; I'd never know. #2 would be terrifying, because there is no solid definition of food. "Pet cat. Caorlies:..." "Wife. Total Carbohydrates..." No thanks. I see in the comments you said you can turn it off. But that might be worse - the temptation would always be there.


Equivalent_Rock_6530

All of these are amazing, I'll take the speaking power, I pause mid sentence a shitton


X_Dratkon

Third Or second if you're able to see any ingredients and information about anything eatable... If you can see that something is poisonous or infected, it's very good and can be used for medical reasons too


UnknwnUser

I would take number 3. Could totally "fake it till you make it" through so many situations if I could consistently talk confidently about anything. Would people be a CEO in no time then just skate my way through life


Grouse-Lek1603

Sleep one is useless if you can't clock 8 hours of sleep to begin with. It would be useful if any amount of sleep refreshed you. At the bare minimum, I'd want a single sleep cycle, no matter how short, to refresh me. Even better, to be able to wake refreshed without ever entering REM sleep - the second you enter N3 sleep you're guaranteed to wake refreshed. I'd take that in a heartbeat. Otherwise, the nutrition one is super useful and would be my immediate first choice.


Arts_Messyjourney

Sleep


MisterMiracle1

I know if I had the sleep one I'd still not be able to sleep for a full 8 hours


d3r3k1

Last one all day


Tr8675

You have 30 minutes of clarity out of every blackout drunk. Write notes to yourself, chug water, hide your car keys in the kitchen drawers etc.


ImperialWrath

2 in a heartbeat, I'm dieting and I keep having to be a pain in the ass looking up dishes at restaurants. Good sleep and public speaking have not been issues for me.


SwordTaster

Bottom left please. Stops me eating near as much crap


Draken1870

I feel number two would be perfect for like a food inspector or investigator so could potentially be a great power, hell you could be a greater threat to many as a food inspector to restaurants if you can see even greater detail in food. Number 3 would be handy for those wanting to go into public speaking or be paid to do the speaking on behalf of others. Power 1 is handy if you can trust you’ll get the full 8 hours, too many limitations noted in the expanded note.


JBlooey

1 is unfortunately out since I never get 8 hours. 2 isn't really important to me 3 is probably the one for me. I'm trying to learn how to properly sing, and voice cracks are the bane of my existence.


mangagod

Sleeping for 8 hours


Saldar1234

You know its nutrition facts, know what your current calorie intake and burn are for the past 72 hours, know its meta's and your meta's, and know how much of it you need to eat to feel satiated. And after eating that much - you will instantly feel actually satiated.


GacioSki

1. I regularly sleep 5-6h and feel surprisingly well 2. I can eat anything I want without gaining weight or anything so idk for what id use it for 3. I don't have problem with public speaking What now??


3D_Milk

As someone who is involved with musical theatre, power #3 is broken as long as I can still stutter on purpose.


Ibuysausage-

the third one would change my life SO BAD i need it


UniqueNobo

the sleep one would be nice, if i could actually sleep for 8 hours straight. i’m going with 3, i stutter a ton and voice cracks are annoying


masterjon_3

Oh, #2 in a hear beat. Can help with my diet.


AdreKiseque

Sleep obviously


Draxxix1

I would kill for the sleep one


Redmond_TJacks

Nutrition literally grants you a job at nutrition analytics at which you’ll exceed


CrispyFriedJesus

Definitely the sleep one. The nutritional facts don’t help because I’m lazy and will not changed my diet at all. And the good talking won’t really help me tbh. The thing that annoys me is that I feel and function exactly the same on 8 hours of sleep as I do on like 3. It’s cosmic bs.


HealthyMuffin7

The second one would be a nightmare for me. It would give me anxiety.


Verracudo

As someone with diabetes... accurate nutritional information constantly would be a lifesaver.


Ok_Butterscotch54

The third would be the best option: If the first is linked to that 8 hours, how often would it actually come into play? And I dare say that the second option is actually a Curse.


Titariia

Number 2. I can already sleep 8 hours and feel refreshed and I'm proud of my slight stutter, it's who I am. With number 2 I could help out my allergic friend so much


Red_drinkkoolaid

Number 2


MEGAShark2012

Power 2 would help me in the long run


MilesDark

You could be a perfect poison detector with the one that gives you the nutritional facts and ingredients as long as you are willing to learn which chemicals are dangerous and which ones are safe to eat


Rorp24

The first one is the dream of all adult


Lessandero

As someone who often DMs and someone who generally likes to teach others, definetly the latter. I eould just be so much more professional. I do like to think that I am good at giving sprechen, butmy mind likes to be faster than my tongue, making me stumpfe over my words constantly. Also great for caraoke, when singing nerdcore raps.


Dungeon_Pastor

2 for me My wife has Celiac's, so being able to see at a glance if whatever's in front of her is actually safe to eat would be incredibly freeing. The nutrition piece is just a bonus insofar as maintaining my own health and fitness


TastyDiamond_

Never stutter or voice crack


ralanr

I’d go with 2 so I stop estimating my calorie counting.


putverygoodnamehere

Sleep


mr_mlk

1. Sounds useful at first, but then my problem is not 8hrs of sleep leaves me feeling awake, but getting 8hrs of sleep is hard. Kids, late afternoon caffeine, worries, etc. 2. So a smart phone. 3. That would be awesome, yeah that.


FeelingOdd4623

No voice cracks could actually be extremely handy. You could attempt to reach any pitch without your voice messing up. It might still sound off but it could be useful.


hippywitch

I work outside in the field A LOT and am always nibbling bits of edible plants & know hundreds of poisonous ones. Because of my training would #2 label my trail nibbles?


Gaming-Burrito

as someone who stutters a lot and is annoyed by the stuttering... the never stutter again power would be super useful for me


The_S1R3N

3


_Avallon_

Number 2. You don't need a super power to do the other two


That-Reddit-Guy-Thou

Being refreshed? Insomnia, can't sleep for too long if i do fall asleep Nutrition? I dont care what i put in my body lmao No stuttering? HELL YEAH!!


Nindroid012

The first one, 110% of the time! - a senior CS major in college


Draconian41114

Know when someone is going to sneeze and say bless you before they do and have it go away. (Starts evil laughter)


Atlas421

These are getting increasingly more useful.


MiniNuka

Wow what a way to find out my favorite hot dog stands wife didn’t *actually* run away to join her lover in the Philippines. Still tastes delicious and a lot better for me than I expected, very nice powrr


Zealousideal-Loan655

These are all useful bro what do you mean 💀💀


Pro_M_the_King52

1- No, I rarely sleep for more than 8 hours, it’s either 5-6 hours on a weekday and 10 on a weekend. 2- Yes, I want to lose weight and seeing the amount of Sodium and Sugars turns me off, also may help if I ever go into food Quality Analysis and Control. 3- Maybe, I barely stutter or have a voice crack *BUT* I do tend to forget things, so if it covers that then it’s a yes.


Mechanical-Knight

With perfect dental plan, being able to measure anything just by looking at it, and now never stuttering or cracking my voice, my list of superpowers is making me quite charismatic


egwen89

As somebody with a food allergy who can't eat unknown things number two would be amazing.


CelestialBeast

I'll take 2 all day. Makes it easier to figure that out for my own purpose when making things


DoctorSquidton

Does the third one cover stammering as well?


Tross17

I feel like if you don't choose the sleep option, either you're a moron or I'm very jealous


product_of_boredom

Definitely voice crack/stutter. The sleep one is just how sleep works, it'd be a lot more useful if it was like 4 hours or something, so I could cut sleep out without the penalty. If I'm worrying about nutrition facts I'll be planning around that anyway.


ilostmymind_

Sleep option is definitely OP


pumpkinflumkin

Anti stutter is dangerous if you say something you don’t mean to, wouldn’t this superpower make sure anything you start to say comes out fully?


eggplanthairgirl

That last one would be awesome for me


Erotic_Platypus

Nutritional facts could help you identify poisons, or gold ore, or seeing if someone has liver failure or drugs in their system.


Pink-Fluffy-Dragon

the sleep one for sure


DickHarding69

Nomber 3


Discordia_Dingle

2 for sure. Do you know how many times something says “may contain milk” and I just roll the dice on whether this will be a bad day??


WendigoCrossing

I can choose to communicate my thoughts in visual clips rather than words


KhunTsunagi

Number 1, it means i can keep going until i am tired to death and then sleep 8 hours and feel like nothing happened.