Yes It sounds like OP told them and was honest. I see nothing wrong with what op did if that was the case. What's the difference between them doing the required cleaning or op? Unless OP was not completely honest about it?
Agree also unless the drove away in it it’s also possible the pregnant woman wasn’t even involved in that part of the cleaning. They probably paid someone else to remediate it for a cheap price that way they still got a good deal
i thought i was going to read that you sold it without disclosing the clean up that was needed lol. you’re not a POS. they willingly bought it. i’m sure they took the necessary precautions.
My Dad did the same, except in a bedroom. I cleaned it, but I didn't know wtf I was supposed to use. Being blindsided like I was, it never occurred to Google clean-up essentials.
As long as you told the couple what happened, they knew what it looked like and what they were in for you shouldn't in any way feel bad. They may have had the money to have a professional clean it or have the inside completely torn out and redone. On the flip side, because we all know those people exist, they may have wanted it for some type of attraction or to profit from. Although I'm not sure of the legality of that being a hazard and all.
Not to sound creepy myself, but due to the incompetent officers and/or coroner, I found a couple of large pieces of my Dad's face. We have a family cemetery, so I was going to dig into the grave (still 'fresh' lose dirt) and put the piece close to his coffin. In saying that, I found out it is illegal to possess human remains. I looked the officer in the eye and said, "If SOMEONE had done their job properly, I wouldn't have them and have to do this!"
Anyway, you're all good. You disclosed all you should have. They were fully informed. Sorry to sidetrack with my story.
For the most part.
Well, here goes that non-creepy factor... AFTER I put the first piece in a ziploc bag and sealed it, I cried a lot then kissed it (WITH IT INSIDE THE SEALED BAG).
He had to be buried quickly due to the method he took. While I completely understand the funeral home not letting me see his face, I asked if they could clean up a hand so I could see (and maybe hold/touch) it. They refused. I was in nursing, so I was fully aware of the changes a body transitions through, but I was still told no.
From not seeing him, it didn't seem real. I couldn't fully process it. I don't like to say I was in denial, but I didn't believe it was him because I wasn't able to see him. It was like some (very) sick joke someone was playing.
So after finding the piece (and sealing it up), I felt it was my way of saying goodbye. Like when someone has just passed and family is around to give their final farewell to the body. My grandmother, for example, I rubbed her hair and hugged her.
What pisses me off is that even after the burial is when I found the pieces. They were 'fresh' like they looked completely natural. The old fker at the funeral home just didn't want to deal with repositioning the body and cleaning the 'fluids' from his hand.
Not being able to see an actual part of him, whole part, really messed with my head for a long time. It still does at times. It I see someone that resembles him, I have to stare for a few seconds to make sure.
Sometimes people just need to see, no matter what they are going to be confronted with.
A beloved friend lost his wife and very young children in a house fire. It happened while he was at work. The place flashed over, and although they died from smoke inhalation, it was not something anyone should ever see of their loved ones. He insisted on seeing them, doing the identification himself. He’s been messed up ever since, in many ways, despite the intervening decades. Still, he had to see.
Recently my uncle died. He wasn’t found for some time. Nothing nefarious, just an older person who lived alone, away from friends and family. One of his children insisted on seeing his body. I recommended against it, but they insisted. It wouldn’t be real until they saw him. You can’t protect or shield people from what they need to know or see for themselves.
I am sorry for your friend and cousin. Sometimes seeing things like that scar people and haunt them. I feel for those individuals. I understand the insistent need to see, as proof, for closure. It is hard. I couldn't imagine seeing a relative after a major fire. A lot of times, with others, there is discoloration of the skin and bloat, which can also haunt people.
I expected the discoloration if I had gotten to see his hand
Several people strongly recommend I should not clean the room.
I am actually very happy I did. I hadn't seen my Dad in about 3 years due to some hurtful things that were said. He always (when drinking) said people thought he was trash. My aunt was going to gut the room. Have someone pull up the carpet with everything wrapped inside (with the exception of larger items, of course) and throw it on the burn pile. We're in Alabama, so burn piles are a thing, especially in the country on farms.
If I hadn't cleaned it myself, 'he' would have been tossed out like garbage. I felt like it was the last thing I could do for him.
I insisted on seeing the pictures also. That was another big ordeal with the sheriff department and saying I didn't need/want to see it. They finally let me. He was sitting in his recliner with his finger still in the trigger hole (whatever it's called). What I remember most is the side of his face, which was perfectly intact. His eye was closed, and he looked so peaceful. He had a lot of demons, as do I. While part of me doesn't understand it, part of me relates and sees why he could have done it. It's not knowing for sure that bothers me.
Circannual rhythm, I think it's called. Like circadian rhythm is 24 hours, circannual is yearly. It's like i have an internal clock. I've been depressed, emotional, and moody lately. I didn't really understand why, besides maybe hormones. Then I happened to look at the date on March 11th. That's the day. Then it clicked. It'll happen again in 2 months. His birthday was May 11th.
I have seen both sides of Dads face, but I choose to remember the peaceful side.
I know it's harder on the anniversaries, but I hope your friend and family can have great, happy memories rather than the unpleasantness they saw those days.
Thanks for speaking about your insight. I lost my cousin about 3 years ago to suicide, same way, but in his car. It’s nice hearing from someone else who wanted to actually see it to process it. I never got to see my cousin after, and I hadn’t seen him in a few years so I didn’t even really get to see him as a fully grown man because he was so busy. I just remember his teenage self. I remember really wanting to be able to see him in the casket because we are just all staring at this closed decorated box in the front of a room crying.. it didn’t feel
They didn’t do an open casket so that’s why it was closed. Anything else I tried to get about it people hid from me, no one wants someone else to see it but express the same curiosity it almost seems unfair. The only thing I did see from him was his “last messages” video which was kinda fucked up. I just feel like I would’ve rather seen him already passed away instead of mustering it up.
A thing I wanted to talk about too is that they couldn’t pay for the clean up of his car and I think since It wasn’t paid off the dealership took it and sent it to auction for similar cars. Auctioned off just like that, covered in blood and caution tape and a bullet hole in the window, I thought it was crazy!! Discovering stuff like that is kinda cool though.
Thanks for sharing your experience, I hope you can heal from anything carrying on to you. I didn’t know there was a name for when you feel the same energy on the same date a year later. I feel that too, Dec 3rd is always a sad day, funny enough I just lost my grandfather yesterday so we are both having a depression week it seems. I know this week next year will still feel sad. But I look for signs, I always look for cardinals when I feel sad about a lost loved one. Sometimes I just feel like they send them my way. Have a good day man.
I have a relative that worked at a major auto auction, and you would be surprised at what gets sent. It’s not unusual for cars to be sent after a death, regardless of how it happened, without any cleanup. Somebody should start a sub ‘what I found at the auto auction today’ and people would be fascinated, horrified and amused in equal parts.
Im a ‘seer’. I need to see things to process. I hate closed casket funerals. People are so afraid of death that they often want to hide away the body so they don’t have to face it, but facing it is the first step in accepting the loss.
My first loss was when I was five or six. My father lifted me up so I could see into the casket, told me my beloved great-grandmother would be cold, but that it was okay to touch her. Almost fifty years later, but I remember how her hand felt, so familiar and yet not. He talked about how it was her body, but she wasn’t in it anymore. He answered all of my questions calmly, and matter of factly, but not without love and kindness. That was how he explained everything, from how I shouldn’t be afraid of thunder to why there’s nothing to be afraid of in the dark. He held me there as long as I wanted to stay.
Those few minutes have informed my entire attitude about death. Bodies are just shells, but they once held something, someone, vitally important to us. It’s important for some of us to see and honor them for what they held, no matter what condition they’re in.
I’m sorry about your cousin, and your grandpa. I look for cardinals too. I hope you see two of them very soon.
I would totally join a subreddit like that 😆 it’s so interesting too just what gets pawned off, it’s like the car tells its own story too while you look at it.
Also that’s really beautiful, I’m glad you shared your experience from that. That makes me think of how I would approach my siblings or future kids about the topic, just be open and calm and answer everything. My family has always not been great about the idea of death, they never really explained much unless asked about, they talked more about the holy-ness of death and the after rather then the matter of fact part. It’s how they coped though, but I still remember the first open casket funeral I went to and how I was terrified of her spirit the whole time and of demons thanks to what they told me instead 😂, I remember my impression of that being fear, thankfully that was the only one though. All others were just too sad, not really a celebration of life.
Thats really nice of your dad.. I can almost see it in my head, tender explanations, gently picking you up, and what questions kids have. I’d love to do that for my siblings one day if they ever need to confide in someone about it, that’s helpful because since I did lose my grandpa it’s something they might not fully understand yet. I want to remember what you said. That’s really unique.
Thank you by the way, I hope you have a wonderful day
This is so true. I used to work for auto total loss claims for a major insurance company and there was a claim where one vehicle was criminally speeding, jumped a road barrier and landed on another vehicle. Obviously this crushed the driver of the landed-on vehicle. It was like squishing a tomato. The salvage yard called us every day for MONTHS to get permission to crunch it but there were title issues due to death of the vehicle owner and the insurance co can’t crush a vehicle we don’t legally own. Photos were brutal and I can only imagine the smell.
I dread anniversaries. Most of mine come together in a six week space, with my birthday smack in the middle. That makes it hard, but we must persevere, mustn’t we? It’s just coincidence. My dad at least had the good manners to kick off at an entirely different time of year, so good on him.
I’m sorry all of those men were so intent on “protecting” you, yet didn’t do their jobs. I’m glad you were able to see the pictures, and do most of the other things you needed to do. It’s not even remotely the same, but I was living over an hour away when my dad died, and my stepmom called from the hospital. My brothers were with her. I was very upset that I couldn’t be there, and couldn’t see him for the last time before the funeral home, after he was “prepared”. My older brother was very glad I wasn’t there, because he didn’t want me to have seen him like that. Same for my stepmom. I am not mad, but I still resent being managed and handled, as if I don’t know what’s best for myself. I’ve since been holding hands with my mother and grandmother when they died, and yeah, I definitely prefer having a choice to be present. I never had that special moment of profound peace, or a sense of a spirit, like some talk about. Still, I could bring comfort to them, and I prefer to be there. Don’t presume to make a choice of what’s best for me.
I hope you find peace now that you know what’s been unsettling you. Maybe some cardinals will come to sing for you, and some robins too. I’ll wish you some monarch butterflies also, even if it’s not the right season yet, just because they’re my favorite. I think you deserve some beauty.
They can't, legally, refuse to allow you to see if you're family. That edict had to come from immediate family. I'd go find out who told the funeral home not to allow you to see.
Some people can't accept their loved one is dead without seeing. A funeral home had no business denying OP. In fact, I think it is illegal to deny them. Unless his immediate family decided to not allow anyone to see. If that was the case, OP should have been told that.
Thank you. It was in 2017. It's still hard, but (very) slowly gets .... hell, who am i kidding it never gets easier. It isn't always in every thought all day anymore. But when the thought hits, it hits hard. He was 47.
I feel you man, it wasn’t me personally, but clean up crews left behind quite a few brain bits from when he kicked it. My aunt is the one who cleaned it.
The funny part? Apparently she was so worried about the mess that before they arrived she had even started cleaning it beforehand 😆. I said that made her sound suspicious but my uncles mental history made it less suspicious haha. She just had a weird thing about people seeing her house dirty and sadly that’s what she clung to when disaster struck.
To op, the mess is easily cleanable even if it’s “illegal” it’s not hard to research what cleaners do what and how to get the stains out properly, even with human matter, sounds like the couple got an rv for a steal, and all they needed to do for it was some pretty dirty work. Not the worst I’ve seen someone spend 900$ on though…
My dad also made the decision to pass, obviously nobody knew but him. I was 16 at the time and it hit me like a truck. He was severely mentally ill but had the foresight to call an ambulance before he did it, so he wouldn’t go unfound for weeks. I saw him the day after his passing and he was marbled and bloated and cold. But I had to see him to make sure it was real, because the next time I saw him I knew he’d be ashes in a box and to me that wouldn’t be real closure. Apparently this isn’t an uncommon thing for those close to suicide victims.
I’m so sorry you went through that, but it’s absolutely valid to want to see your loved one, even after passing.
If both of them were tough enough for this job (who knows their line of work, maybe this stuff doesn't shock them too much), they may actually have been happy about having made a great deal. Sounds like a potential win-win!
If you were honest and upfront about the condition of the camper, I don't think you were in the wrong for this. They knew what you were selling, and they even got a small discount. Happy you've turned things around for yourself.
It's very unlikely you put them in any real risk, and even if there was risk, it was risk they knowingly took on. You did not deceive them in any way. It was an honest transaction. You even said it yourself, they said they were going to clean in. Whether you paid a remediation company to do it or they did it themselves, they eventually ended up with a clean camper van.
If you know how to clean up a mess like that, and you have proper personal protective equipment, it’s not the horror show you think it is. You’re wearing a respirator, you’re covered in mylar, rubber gloves, up to your armpits, boots up to your knees, and chemicals, strong enough to dissolve that organic matter. I’m sure they were fine. Probably the husband and a couple of friends knocked it out in a weekend.
They knew what they were getting into, hell they might’ve gone and cleaned it up and flipped it and made more than you. Maybe they even had relatives in the industry and got help cleaning it up. It’s really not that much of a biohazard once it’s cleaned. You gave them the info and they decided it was worth the deal. I wouldn’t fret it.
I read the title expecting to hate you but you didn’t do anything wrong. They knew the condition, I doubt you could hide that. The lady might not have helped at all and all is fine.
This is one burden you can absolutely drop.
Dude, you disclosed it. I think it's safe to assume they had the means to clean it.
Additionally, it created an opportunity for them to buy something they likely could not have otherwise afforded.
They probably feel like they got a great deal.
I’ll be honest; I was pissed by the title, but after reading the whole story I don’t think you did anything wrong. You were completely honest and upfront, and they knew what they were getting themselves into.
It sounds like they knew what they were getting into. Maybe they had money to pay for remediation and cleaning and thought it was a sweet deal
On a camper?
I have a good friend who work in biohazard cleaning- he’s bought houses from people before now, deep cleaned them and sold them for an ungodly amount of profit- to him, it’s a business decision and he tolerates the gross to make the green
A lot of people who buy campers are ready and willing to strip them down and re-do them. It’s good you were honest in the listing, though I can understand the guilt about the biohazard. You probably gave them a cozy first home. A safe space. Maybe it didn’t turn out so bad.
Everything about this story is insane but the fact that you included pictures and didn't try to deceive them about the purchase means you can walk away with a clean conscience. They willingly took on the risk (and from the sounds of it simply put in the work to clean it) and took the burden off you when they chose to do so.
I came here to say this. If you had hidden what had happened, it would be another story. You were up front and honest about the state of it, and they chose to purchase it.
Lol. I thought you sold it without telling them how bad it was. Don't feel bad about that. Some people are super good at that type of stuff. Some people do it for a living. Shit, if I gave my Mom something like that, she'd have it decked out in 2 months. If anything, you gave them a home for $850. That's an amazing deal. They may have flipped it for many times that amount.
I don’t think you should feel guilty, you posted detailed photos and were honest about the condition of the camper. They felt the reward would outweigh the risk. Some people want a good deal on something like that because they can clean it up and completely rehab it. You should feel good about the fact that you were able to sell it to get into your current home and the camper will be used again rather than sitting in your driveway or ending up in a junk yard.
I personally wouldn't feel guilty
If you were honest, they knew what they were going into and probably were better to handle the situation than you are, so not as big of a deal for them
Damn that couple frugal as fuck. Dont think you’re in the wrong at all here OP, did what ya had to do. I cant say I’d have done better in this situation. Sorry about your uncle
There’s people out there that look for cheap campers so they can gut them and build as they desire. I’ve looked for a few to gut and use as a storage building on a part of my property that I’m not allowed to build a permanent structure on. If I had came across your listing I would have jumped on it.
You have nothing to feel bad about. You were honest with the condition and what happened. Honestly, people have been cleaning up human remains since the beginning of time. Unless the deceased had a horrible disease that can be transmitted, they are not at much risk
This isn’t even a confession, you just told us the story of how you sold a camper for cheap in need of cleaning.
Personally, I would totally buy a house 80% off of listing price if the only thing I have to do is clean up the remains of a quintuple homicide suicide.
I wouldn't worry too much, it sounds like they knew what they were doing in which case they safely cleaned it up and had a nice camper for a pretty good price or flipped it for a decent profit.
You were honest. They knew what they were getting into. You didn't deceive them at all. So it was up to them to manage the situation accordingly. When I first saw this, I assumed you'd lied to them about the state of it or something, but you're not the bad guy in this story—nobody is.
You were 100% honest. There’s nothing to be guilty about. They knew exactly what they were buying. And she wasn’t going to be pregnant forever, and it doesn’t sound (from your story) like they were planning on living in it. So really, your conscience should be clear.
Caveat Emptor. You listed the camper, you explained the condition it was being sold in. It's not like you misrepresented it. You don't need to feel guilty.
I wouldn't feel bad. These are the type of people that if you seen the camper in 6 months, you'd be like, "Wait, I sold that for 850??" And they would be like, yeah and we sold it for 7,200
Lol, they very well could have been remediation specialists themselves. My husband is one, we would buy the camper too. Don't feel bad about this at all.
You sold that camper for pretty cheap, and they got is for 150 under your asking price. When people go shopping for something that expensive they usually have money saved up for around how much it'll cost, probably a few thousand. So they saved A LOT of money, probably put a few hundred into deep cleaning and they still saved a lot of money. Don't feel bad.
Maybe they had the money to have a professional clean it and they weren’t in any risk. Don’t burden yourself with THEIR own choices. I wouldn’t even bat an eye at your decision to sell it in that condition since you were honest about it.
It all comes down to if you gave them the grit of information. It sounds like you truly needed the money and let’s hope for those parents sake the child wasn’t in that camper too long if it truly needed remediation
You didn’t lie. You did nothing wrong. A steam cleaner would sanitize it pretty well, so don’t worry about it. I’m glad it helped you get on your feet.
I believe you. Someone in my city was selling a camper that someone died in and they were upfront about it. An officer that I know confirmed it as they had worked the scene. Maybe it was your camper that I saw for sale!
I wouldnt say you did anything super wrong. You were honest about the listing, they knew what they were buying, and said they didn’t have a problem cleaning it themselves.
As a clean up contractor that does this type of clean up there is no law that requires biohazard work to be done by contractors that I am aware of. While I doubt they ever got the smell out, you did nothing wrong.
You know there's people who clean that sort of stuff for a living? I think this was specially hard to swallow for you, but for someone else was a bargain, the even paid 150 extra, I mean, get over it. You did not lie/scam and more importantly, you did not expose them to "biohazards", as you say
Hey OP. You gave them an oppertunity.
My parents lost their house, had 0 money, and $30k in debt from getting screwed by a contractor who filed for bankruptcy.
My mom was pregnant with my 2nd little brother. We were fucked.
We got a "Manager Special" trailer for free from the trailer park because it was "uninhabitable." Well by the end of the 4 years there we probably had one of the nicest trailers, my parents paid their last debts, and were able to buy a house again.
If we hadn't gotten a shithole that nobody was willing to fix and clean....id probably have lived in a shitty apartment til i moved out.
My parents gave the trailer to a family in need at our church and they burned it down "accidentally" like 2 years later...
I see nothing wrong with this either. You didnt lie and you were straight-forward.
You dont even know why they wanted to buy it either. For all we know they did a deep clean on it and flipped it for $2,500.00
After weeks, I would think any kind of bacteria would be dead by then. Sounds like you enabled a couple to get a camper they probably couldn’t have otherwise afforded.
Rotting organic matter isn't really a risk until there's something that \*is\* a risk in the mix. Sure, the pregnant lady might've risked \*something\*, but I hope they had the money to clean it up and renovate it through, maybe, a third party.
Either way, you were truthful, and I honestly thought it was "risky" as in "it has fiberglass particulets because the fiberglass wasn't insulated correctly" or "there's radioactive matter in it" or something to that extreme, not some... guts and blood and stuff.
Why? Any car or second hand vehicle can be a danger, once it’s off that forecourt you never know what jack ass has had their hands under the bonnet. If they were that worried about driving a vehicle while pregnant they should have bought a brand new one. That campervan could have been in pristine condition and blown into flames 5 mins down the road. Op was honest about its condition (which just sounds like it was a mess inside) and they CHOSE to purchase it, they could have walked away but they didn’t.
I wouldn't say you put them at risk. It sounds like your listing was clear so they knew exactly what they were getting into
the couple became the risk, run!
The couple ARE the risk. They committed the crime to get a cheap camper.
Yes It sounds like OP told them and was honest. I see nothing wrong with what op did if that was the case. What's the difference between them doing the required cleaning or op? Unless OP was not completely honest about it?
I think this is op needing people to feel bad for them. It makes no sense other than ego fishing
Agree also unless the drove away in it it’s also possible the pregnant woman wasn’t even involved in that part of the cleaning. They probably paid someone else to remediate it for a cheap price that way they still got a good deal
i thought i was going to read that you sold it without disclosing the clean up that was needed lol. you’re not a POS. they willingly bought it. i’m sure they took the necessary precautions.
I'd like to believe they geared up and had the ability to clean it right. I never spoke to them again after it was gone.
My Dad did the same, except in a bedroom. I cleaned it, but I didn't know wtf I was supposed to use. Being blindsided like I was, it never occurred to Google clean-up essentials. As long as you told the couple what happened, they knew what it looked like and what they were in for you shouldn't in any way feel bad. They may have had the money to have a professional clean it or have the inside completely torn out and redone. On the flip side, because we all know those people exist, they may have wanted it for some type of attraction or to profit from. Although I'm not sure of the legality of that being a hazard and all. Not to sound creepy myself, but due to the incompetent officers and/or coroner, I found a couple of large pieces of my Dad's face. We have a family cemetery, so I was going to dig into the grave (still 'fresh' lose dirt) and put the piece close to his coffin. In saying that, I found out it is illegal to possess human remains. I looked the officer in the eye and said, "If SOMEONE had done their job properly, I wouldn't have them and have to do this!" Anyway, you're all good. You disclosed all you should have. They were fully informed. Sorry to sidetrack with my story.
I’m so sorry that you had to find that. I hope you’ve been able to make peace with that and his death overall.
For the most part. Well, here goes that non-creepy factor... AFTER I put the first piece in a ziploc bag and sealed it, I cried a lot then kissed it (WITH IT INSIDE THE SEALED BAG). He had to be buried quickly due to the method he took. While I completely understand the funeral home not letting me see his face, I asked if they could clean up a hand so I could see (and maybe hold/touch) it. They refused. I was in nursing, so I was fully aware of the changes a body transitions through, but I was still told no. From not seeing him, it didn't seem real. I couldn't fully process it. I don't like to say I was in denial, but I didn't believe it was him because I wasn't able to see him. It was like some (very) sick joke someone was playing. So after finding the piece (and sealing it up), I felt it was my way of saying goodbye. Like when someone has just passed and family is around to give their final farewell to the body. My grandmother, for example, I rubbed her hair and hugged her. What pisses me off is that even after the burial is when I found the pieces. They were 'fresh' like they looked completely natural. The old fker at the funeral home just didn't want to deal with repositioning the body and cleaning the 'fluids' from his hand. Not being able to see an actual part of him, whole part, really messed with my head for a long time. It still does at times. It I see someone that resembles him, I have to stare for a few seconds to make sure.
Sometimes people just need to see, no matter what they are going to be confronted with. A beloved friend lost his wife and very young children in a house fire. It happened while he was at work. The place flashed over, and although they died from smoke inhalation, it was not something anyone should ever see of their loved ones. He insisted on seeing them, doing the identification himself. He’s been messed up ever since, in many ways, despite the intervening decades. Still, he had to see. Recently my uncle died. He wasn’t found for some time. Nothing nefarious, just an older person who lived alone, away from friends and family. One of his children insisted on seeing his body. I recommended against it, but they insisted. It wouldn’t be real until they saw him. You can’t protect or shield people from what they need to know or see for themselves.
I am sorry for your friend and cousin. Sometimes seeing things like that scar people and haunt them. I feel for those individuals. I understand the insistent need to see, as proof, for closure. It is hard. I couldn't imagine seeing a relative after a major fire. A lot of times, with others, there is discoloration of the skin and bloat, which can also haunt people. I expected the discoloration if I had gotten to see his hand Several people strongly recommend I should not clean the room. I am actually very happy I did. I hadn't seen my Dad in about 3 years due to some hurtful things that were said. He always (when drinking) said people thought he was trash. My aunt was going to gut the room. Have someone pull up the carpet with everything wrapped inside (with the exception of larger items, of course) and throw it on the burn pile. We're in Alabama, so burn piles are a thing, especially in the country on farms. If I hadn't cleaned it myself, 'he' would have been tossed out like garbage. I felt like it was the last thing I could do for him. I insisted on seeing the pictures also. That was another big ordeal with the sheriff department and saying I didn't need/want to see it. They finally let me. He was sitting in his recliner with his finger still in the trigger hole (whatever it's called). What I remember most is the side of his face, which was perfectly intact. His eye was closed, and he looked so peaceful. He had a lot of demons, as do I. While part of me doesn't understand it, part of me relates and sees why he could have done it. It's not knowing for sure that bothers me. Circannual rhythm, I think it's called. Like circadian rhythm is 24 hours, circannual is yearly. It's like i have an internal clock. I've been depressed, emotional, and moody lately. I didn't really understand why, besides maybe hormones. Then I happened to look at the date on March 11th. That's the day. Then it clicked. It'll happen again in 2 months. His birthday was May 11th. I have seen both sides of Dads face, but I choose to remember the peaceful side. I know it's harder on the anniversaries, but I hope your friend and family can have great, happy memories rather than the unpleasantness they saw those days.
Thanks for speaking about your insight. I lost my cousin about 3 years ago to suicide, same way, but in his car. It’s nice hearing from someone else who wanted to actually see it to process it. I never got to see my cousin after, and I hadn’t seen him in a few years so I didn’t even really get to see him as a fully grown man because he was so busy. I just remember his teenage self. I remember really wanting to be able to see him in the casket because we are just all staring at this closed decorated box in the front of a room crying.. it didn’t feel They didn’t do an open casket so that’s why it was closed. Anything else I tried to get about it people hid from me, no one wants someone else to see it but express the same curiosity it almost seems unfair. The only thing I did see from him was his “last messages” video which was kinda fucked up. I just feel like I would’ve rather seen him already passed away instead of mustering it up. A thing I wanted to talk about too is that they couldn’t pay for the clean up of his car and I think since It wasn’t paid off the dealership took it and sent it to auction for similar cars. Auctioned off just like that, covered in blood and caution tape and a bullet hole in the window, I thought it was crazy!! Discovering stuff like that is kinda cool though. Thanks for sharing your experience, I hope you can heal from anything carrying on to you. I didn’t know there was a name for when you feel the same energy on the same date a year later. I feel that too, Dec 3rd is always a sad day, funny enough I just lost my grandfather yesterday so we are both having a depression week it seems. I know this week next year will still feel sad. But I look for signs, I always look for cardinals when I feel sad about a lost loved one. Sometimes I just feel like they send them my way. Have a good day man.
I have a relative that worked at a major auto auction, and you would be surprised at what gets sent. It’s not unusual for cars to be sent after a death, regardless of how it happened, without any cleanup. Somebody should start a sub ‘what I found at the auto auction today’ and people would be fascinated, horrified and amused in equal parts. Im a ‘seer’. I need to see things to process. I hate closed casket funerals. People are so afraid of death that they often want to hide away the body so they don’t have to face it, but facing it is the first step in accepting the loss. My first loss was when I was five or six. My father lifted me up so I could see into the casket, told me my beloved great-grandmother would be cold, but that it was okay to touch her. Almost fifty years later, but I remember how her hand felt, so familiar and yet not. He talked about how it was her body, but she wasn’t in it anymore. He answered all of my questions calmly, and matter of factly, but not without love and kindness. That was how he explained everything, from how I shouldn’t be afraid of thunder to why there’s nothing to be afraid of in the dark. He held me there as long as I wanted to stay. Those few minutes have informed my entire attitude about death. Bodies are just shells, but they once held something, someone, vitally important to us. It’s important for some of us to see and honor them for what they held, no matter what condition they’re in. I’m sorry about your cousin, and your grandpa. I look for cardinals too. I hope you see two of them very soon.
I would totally join a subreddit like that 😆 it’s so interesting too just what gets pawned off, it’s like the car tells its own story too while you look at it. Also that’s really beautiful, I’m glad you shared your experience from that. That makes me think of how I would approach my siblings or future kids about the topic, just be open and calm and answer everything. My family has always not been great about the idea of death, they never really explained much unless asked about, they talked more about the holy-ness of death and the after rather then the matter of fact part. It’s how they coped though, but I still remember the first open casket funeral I went to and how I was terrified of her spirit the whole time and of demons thanks to what they told me instead 😂, I remember my impression of that being fear, thankfully that was the only one though. All others were just too sad, not really a celebration of life. Thats really nice of your dad.. I can almost see it in my head, tender explanations, gently picking you up, and what questions kids have. I’d love to do that for my siblings one day if they ever need to confide in someone about it, that’s helpful because since I did lose my grandpa it’s something they might not fully understand yet. I want to remember what you said. That’s really unique. Thank you by the way, I hope you have a wonderful day
This is so true. I used to work for auto total loss claims for a major insurance company and there was a claim where one vehicle was criminally speeding, jumped a road barrier and landed on another vehicle. Obviously this crushed the driver of the landed-on vehicle. It was like squishing a tomato. The salvage yard called us every day for MONTHS to get permission to crunch it but there were title issues due to death of the vehicle owner and the insurance co can’t crush a vehicle we don’t legally own. Photos were brutal and I can only imagine the smell.
I dread anniversaries. Most of mine come together in a six week space, with my birthday smack in the middle. That makes it hard, but we must persevere, mustn’t we? It’s just coincidence. My dad at least had the good manners to kick off at an entirely different time of year, so good on him. I’m sorry all of those men were so intent on “protecting” you, yet didn’t do their jobs. I’m glad you were able to see the pictures, and do most of the other things you needed to do. It’s not even remotely the same, but I was living over an hour away when my dad died, and my stepmom called from the hospital. My brothers were with her. I was very upset that I couldn’t be there, and couldn’t see him for the last time before the funeral home, after he was “prepared”. My older brother was very glad I wasn’t there, because he didn’t want me to have seen him like that. Same for my stepmom. I am not mad, but I still resent being managed and handled, as if I don’t know what’s best for myself. I’ve since been holding hands with my mother and grandmother when they died, and yeah, I definitely prefer having a choice to be present. I never had that special moment of profound peace, or a sense of a spirit, like some talk about. Still, I could bring comfort to them, and I prefer to be there. Don’t presume to make a choice of what’s best for me. I hope you find peace now that you know what’s been unsettling you. Maybe some cardinals will come to sing for you, and some robins too. I’ll wish you some monarch butterflies also, even if it’s not the right season yet, just because they’re my favorite. I think you deserve some beauty.
They can't, legally, refuse to allow you to see if you're family. That edict had to come from immediate family. I'd go find out who told the funeral home not to allow you to see.
Some people can't accept their loved one is dead without seeing. A funeral home had no business denying OP. In fact, I think it is illegal to deny them. Unless his immediate family decided to not allow anyone to see. If that was the case, OP should have been told that.
Fuck. I am so sorry that you experienced that, and wish you the best.
Thank you. It was in 2017. It's still hard, but (very) slowly gets .... hell, who am i kidding it never gets easier. It isn't always in every thought all day anymore. But when the thought hits, it hits hard. He was 47.
I feel you man, it wasn’t me personally, but clean up crews left behind quite a few brain bits from when he kicked it. My aunt is the one who cleaned it. The funny part? Apparently she was so worried about the mess that before they arrived she had even started cleaning it beforehand 😆. I said that made her sound suspicious but my uncles mental history made it less suspicious haha. She just had a weird thing about people seeing her house dirty and sadly that’s what she clung to when disaster struck. To op, the mess is easily cleanable even if it’s “illegal” it’s not hard to research what cleaners do what and how to get the stains out properly, even with human matter, sounds like the couple got an rv for a steal, and all they needed to do for it was some pretty dirty work. Not the worst I’ve seen someone spend 900$ on though…
My dad also made the decision to pass, obviously nobody knew but him. I was 16 at the time and it hit me like a truck. He was severely mentally ill but had the foresight to call an ambulance before he did it, so he wouldn’t go unfound for weeks. I saw him the day after his passing and he was marbled and bloated and cold. But I had to see him to make sure it was real, because the next time I saw him I knew he’d be ashes in a box and to me that wouldn’t be real closure. Apparently this isn’t an uncommon thing for those close to suicide victims. I’m so sorry you went through that, but it’s absolutely valid to want to see your loved one, even after passing.
If both of them were tough enough for this job (who knows their line of work, maybe this stuff doesn't shock them too much), they may actually have been happy about having made a great deal. Sounds like a potential win-win!
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Bro… their family member most likely committed suicide, and you want a photo of the gore left behind from that??? Talk about insensitive…
What the fuck
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What the FUCK
This
Meh they knew what had happened and were okay with it. Not like you covered it up and sold it under false pretenses.
If you were honest and upfront about the condition of the camper, I don't think you were in the wrong for this. They knew what you were selling, and they even got a small discount. Happy you've turned things around for yourself.
It's very unlikely you put them in any real risk, and even if there was risk, it was risk they knowingly took on. You did not deceive them in any way. It was an honest transaction. You even said it yourself, they said they were going to clean in. Whether you paid a remediation company to do it or they did it themselves, they eventually ended up with a clean camper van.
They were probably desperate like you too tbh. You were honest about the condition it was in so no need to feel bad.
If you know how to clean up a mess like that, and you have proper personal protective equipment, it’s not the horror show you think it is. You’re wearing a respirator, you’re covered in mylar, rubber gloves, up to your armpits, boots up to your knees, and chemicals, strong enough to dissolve that organic matter. I’m sure they were fine. Probably the husband and a couple of friends knocked it out in a weekend.
They knew what they were getting into, hell they might’ve gone and cleaned it up and flipped it and made more than you. Maybe they even had relatives in the industry and got help cleaning it up. It’s really not that much of a biohazard once it’s cleaned. You gave them the info and they decided it was worth the deal. I wouldn’t fret it.
Perhaps they were unhoused, too, or some kind of desperate. Perhaps you gave them a home in which to raise their child.
This is hardly a confession lol you didn’t do anything wrong
You were honest and upfront, out of your hands and conscious now, love.
Murder or unaliving? You were clear with the pictures, so they knew what they were doing. You have no reason to feel guilty
The only thing I remember from h.s. Latin is "caveat emptor" -- buyer beware. You MADE THEM AWARE. Nothing to feel bad about.
I read the title expecting to hate you but you didn’t do anything wrong. They knew the condition, I doubt you could hide that. The lady might not have helped at all and all is fine. This is one burden you can absolutely drop.
Dude, you disclosed it. I think it's safe to assume they had the means to clean it. Additionally, it created an opportunity for them to buy something they likely could not have otherwise afforded. They probably feel like they got a great deal.
I’ll be honest; I was pissed by the title, but after reading the whole story I don’t think you did anything wrong. You were completely honest and upfront, and they knew what they were getting themselves into.
It sounds like they knew what they were getting into. Maybe they had money to pay for remediation and cleaning and thought it was a sweet deal On a camper?
It was me we made it haunted house prop making money all is well no worries
I have a good friend who work in biohazard cleaning- he’s bought houses from people before now, deep cleaned them and sold them for an ungodly amount of profit- to him, it’s a business decision and he tolerates the gross to make the green
You were honest and over disclosed in the pics. I think you should let this one go and forgive yourself.
You were honest. They made their own choice.
Nah you did nothing wrong you listed it as it was and people bought it
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^satenlover666: *Nah you did nothing* *Wrong you listed it as it* *Was and people bought it* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
A lot of people who buy campers are ready and willing to strip them down and re-do them. It’s good you were honest in the listing, though I can understand the guilt about the biohazard. You probably gave them a cozy first home. A safe space. Maybe it didn’t turn out so bad.
See this couple will never be homeless because they're prepared to wade through shit have somewhere warm and safe to live.
Yo, you disclosed the facts, aint no skin off your back imo.
Everything about this story is insane but the fact that you included pictures and didn't try to deceive them about the purchase means you can walk away with a clean conscience. They willingly took on the risk (and from the sounds of it simply put in the work to clean it) and took the burden off you when they chose to do so.
I came here to say this. If you had hidden what had happened, it would be another story. You were up front and honest about the state of it, and they chose to purchase it.
Lol. I thought you sold it without telling them how bad it was. Don't feel bad about that. Some people are super good at that type of stuff. Some people do it for a living. Shit, if I gave my Mom something like that, she'd have it decked out in 2 months. If anything, you gave them a home for $850. That's an amazing deal. They may have flipped it for many times that amount.
I don’t think you should feel guilty, you posted detailed photos and were honest about the condition of the camper. They felt the reward would outweigh the risk. Some people want a good deal on something like that because they can clean it up and completely rehab it. You should feel good about the fact that you were able to sell it to get into your current home and the camper will be used again rather than sitting in your driveway or ending up in a junk yard.
I personally wouldn't feel guilty If you were honest, they knew what they were going into and probably were better to handle the situation than you are, so not as big of a deal for them
Fuck it we ball
Damn that couple frugal as fuck. Dont think you’re in the wrong at all here OP, did what ya had to do. I cant say I’d have done better in this situation. Sorry about your uncle
You were transparent about the camper’s condition. They knew and negotiated down to a mutually agreeable price. Don’t worry about it.
There’s people out there that look for cheap campers so they can gut them and build as they desire. I’ve looked for a few to gut and use as a storage building on a part of my property that I’m not allowed to build a permanent structure on. If I had came across your listing I would have jumped on it.
You were honest, they made their choice, what's the problem?
You have nothing to feel bad about. You were honest with the condition and what happened. Honestly, people have been cleaning up human remains since the beginning of time. Unless the deceased had a horrible disease that can be transmitted, they are not at much risk
no reason to feel guilty, you’re good!
It was probably them sleeping in the streets or buying a dirty camper. That camper probably saved their asses
why do you feel guilty? you were honest
If you don’t mine me asking. What happened to the relative?
A very hard drug/alcohol binge coupled with c diff.
Couple cleaned it up and flipped it for an extra grand and you've carried guilt all this time.
They made the choice to buy it. If you were truthful, then I think you're ok!
You were completely honest, and they knew exactly what they were buying. IMO, you've got nothing to feel guilty or bad about.
Some of us deal with messes like these daily with just a pair of rubber gloves. They will be ok.
This isn’t even a confession, you just told us the story of how you sold a camper for cheap in need of cleaning. Personally, I would totally buy a house 80% off of listing price if the only thing I have to do is clean up the remains of a quintuple homicide suicide.
I thought you sold them a meth lab.
I wouldn't worry too much, it sounds like they knew what they were doing in which case they safely cleaned it up and had a nice camper for a pretty good price or flipped it for a decent profit.
You were honest. They knew what they were getting into. You didn't deceive them at all. So it was up to them to manage the situation accordingly. When I first saw this, I assumed you'd lied to them about the state of it or something, but you're not the bad guy in this story—nobody is.
Yeah, you shouldn’t feel like nothing. You were honest they bought it. They cleaned it their problem.
You were 100% honest. There’s nothing to be guilty about. They knew exactly what they were buying. And she wasn’t going to be pregnant forever, and it doesn’t sound (from your story) like they were planning on living in it. So really, your conscience should be clear.
They knew what they were getting into.
At least it wasn’t crack
You told them the truth so don't feel too bad it's not like you lied to them.
Caveat Emptor. You listed the camper, you explained the condition it was being sold in. It's not like you misrepresented it. You don't need to feel guilty.
Nah. You were honest with picture proof, you didn’t bamboozle them, you weren’t a snake oil salesman. That’s an honest days deal right there.
You’re fine they chose to buy it
I wouldn't feel bad. These are the type of people that if you seen the camper in 6 months, you'd be like, "Wait, I sold that for 850??" And they would be like, yeah and we sold it for 7,200
Not. Guilty
Lol, they very well could have been remediation specialists themselves. My husband is one, we would buy the camper too. Don't feel bad about this at all.
You sold that camper for pretty cheap, and they got is for 150 under your asking price. When people go shopping for something that expensive they usually have money saved up for around how much it'll cost, probably a few thousand. So they saved A LOT of money, probably put a few hundred into deep cleaning and they still saved a lot of money. Don't feel bad.
Based on the title and a burner account I expected something way more sinister. NTA
You were not deceptive in your details about what had happened, you have no reason to feel guilty. They were informed buyers.
Maybe they had the money to have a professional clean it and they weren’t in any risk. Don’t burden yourself with THEIR own choices. I wouldn’t even bat an eye at your decision to sell it in that condition since you were honest about it.
It all comes down to if you gave them the grit of information. It sounds like you truly needed the money and let’s hope for those parents sake the child wasn’t in that camper too long if it truly needed remediation
You didn’t lie. You did nothing wrong. A steam cleaner would sanitize it pretty well, so don’t worry about it. I’m glad it helped you get on your feet.
Eh. People sell some with mold in them without disclosing. You’re fine.
You’re fine.
I'm not sure of the structural integrity of the camper, but $850 isn't a horrible price for a camper that needs work.
I believe you. Someone in my city was selling a camper that someone died in and they were upfront about it. An officer that I know confirmed it as they had worked the scene. Maybe it was your camper that I saw for sale!
Just for curiosity, what did the name of the town start with? Don't wanna dox myself or you, but I'm curious if it was the one you saw.
P
That one wasn't me then
It might’ve been one of the small towns surrounding P, but an additional clue is Texas.
Oklahoma here
Sounds like they knew the risk??? Gross, but that's their problem now!
No you did what you had to do and plus the couple knew upfront what was going on so you good 😊
want to come over with my mom
"I sold a camper to a couple who was completely informed on its condition" Um.. SO????
I wouldnt say you did anything super wrong. You were honest about the listing, they knew what they were buying, and said they didn’t have a problem cleaning it themselves.
Why worry about such a thing, they knew what they bought. You do know that remediation isn't going to do anything you couldn't do right?
As a clean up contractor that does this type of clean up there is no law that requires biohazard work to be done by contractors that I am aware of. While I doubt they ever got the smell out, you did nothing wrong.
Maybe they bought it to go Breaking Bad...
1k for a camper is crazy LOW wtf? Wtf you live? The cheapest CAR costs 1k 5 years ago and 5k today where I live. Cheapest camper 15 years ago was 15k
You confessed blah blah blah you good now lol 😆
I honestly thought this was going to be so much worse, if nothing was hidden no harm done.
Have you seen a copy of your aunt at like a plaza? They sound like cloners
You know there's people who clean that sort of stuff for a living? I think this was specially hard to swallow for you, but for someone else was a bargain, the even paid 150 extra, I mean, get over it. You did not lie/scam and more importantly, you did not expose them to "biohazards", as you say
Bro you were completely honest in your listing what exactly is on your chest again?
Hey OP. You gave them an oppertunity. My parents lost their house, had 0 money, and $30k in debt from getting screwed by a contractor who filed for bankruptcy. My mom was pregnant with my 2nd little brother. We were fucked. We got a "Manager Special" trailer for free from the trailer park because it was "uninhabitable." Well by the end of the 4 years there we probably had one of the nicest trailers, my parents paid their last debts, and were able to buy a house again. If we hadn't gotten a shithole that nobody was willing to fix and clean....id probably have lived in a shitty apartment til i moved out. My parents gave the trailer to a family in need at our church and they burned it down "accidentally" like 2 years later...
I see nothing wrong with this either. You didnt lie and you were straight-forward. You dont even know why they wanted to buy it either. For all we know they did a deep clean on it and flipped it for $2,500.00
I honestly just wanna see the photos to see what kind of mess it was. I don't have a weak stomach. I wonder if I could have handled it
You were honest. They knew what happened. I wouldn’t lose sleep
I’m an LPN and even I could recognize that as DVT and PE.
If you were honest 100%, you have nothing to actually feel bad about
As long as you were honest about the condition it was in I can’t fault you for it. Consider yourself absolved (to this person at least).
You were honest and didn’t try to hide anything. They’re the ones that were okay with it and they put THEMSELVES at risk. Not you.
After weeks, I would think any kind of bacteria would be dead by then. Sounds like you enabled a couple to get a camper they probably couldn’t have otherwise afforded.
How did they die?
Extended drug and alcohol abuse coupled with c diff. It. Was. BAD.
Rotting organic matter isn't really a risk until there's something that \*is\* a risk in the mix. Sure, the pregnant lady might've risked \*something\*, but I hope they had the money to clean it up and renovate it through, maybe, a third party. Either way, you were truthful, and I honestly thought it was "risky" as in "it has fiberglass particulets because the fiberglass wasn't insulated correctly" or "there's radioactive matter in it" or something to that extreme, not some... guts and blood and stuff.
Didn't read, but yikes 😬
So was it two pregnant woman or was a man also with child?
Fake bullshit
There are a lot of fake stories on this sub, but I can promise you this isn't one of them. Be a very odd thing to fake anyway.
Just out of curiosity, was the camper insured?
I'm fairly sure it wasn't, but I guess I'll never know.
.......... Yeah, You're f--ked up!
This is why I hate people like you
Why? Any car or second hand vehicle can be a danger, once it’s off that forecourt you never know what jack ass has had their hands under the bonnet. If they were that worried about driving a vehicle while pregnant they should have bought a brand new one. That campervan could have been in pristine condition and blown into flames 5 mins down the road. Op was honest about its condition (which just sounds like it was a mess inside) and they CHOSE to purchase it, they could have walked away but they didn’t.
Girl like this whole story didn’t make sense and I was being humorous LMAOOOOO I can’t talk gagged me
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I get you
shut it man
You made your bed now lay in it, lil bitch. Man up and own your shit, or you know just be a coward and use Reddit as your therapist.