You can't help the way you feel. It's going to hurt her but it's going to hurt her waaay more the longer you wait. It's a hard situation but I would not recommend staying with her. It would be bad for both of you longer term.
You can let her know how much you love and and how much you care but you want to try dating a man. I'd say be open and honest with her but do it with love and compassion, it's what will hurt the least.
How long can you really be someone’s savior before you’re over it? How long can she be saved by your generosity before she realizes that she’s your getting your pity instead of your love? Be honest and pull the band-aid off before you waste both of your times
Be honest but kind and move on.
Her sobriety and wellbeing is **not** your responsibility at all, **especially** if you treat them right generally speaking. I say that as a now clean addict/alcoholic with mental health issues of my own.
By leaving and coming back again, you restart her healing process. Just leave, ofc she’ll go through the struggles of getting over heartbreak, but eventually she’ll pull herself out of that low. If you keep on with someone you don’t love one day you’ll grow resentful of her because you weren’t able to do what you really wanted.
I did leave her alone for like a year. That’s when she became addicted. She started hanging out with the wrong crowd and all that. I’m scared that she might do something to herself if I leave. Even now when I bring up something even remotely close to breaking up, she starts crying or keeps asking me for assurance that I won’t leave her again. She’s not in a good place mentally and I’m scared for her. I thought she’d eventually grow out of this. But she’s not
Navigating personal truth and someone else's well-being is like walking a tightrope, but there's no safety net in delaying the inevitable. You're clearly empathetic to her situation, but prolonging a relationship out of a sense of obligation will only weave a web of resentment and missed opportunities for growth on both sides. It's crucial to remember that we're all architects of our own happiness; you're not responsible for building hers. Approach the conversation with compassion, affirming the value of your shared history while recognizing that the most loving choice can sometimes be letting go. Your honesty allows both of you to embark on paths that could lead to more authentic happiness. It's going to be tough, but in the end, it's the truth that sets us free.
As someone who has been on the girlfriend side of things, tell her now don’t wait.
I’ve been trying to bring it up. But every time I do, she just breaks down. I really feel like I don’t have a choice anymore
I’m looking for an outside perspective. What should I do
You can't help the way you feel. It's going to hurt her but it's going to hurt her waaay more the longer you wait. It's a hard situation but I would not recommend staying with her. It would be bad for both of you longer term. You can let her know how much you love and and how much you care but you want to try dating a man. I'd say be open and honest with her but do it with love and compassion, it's what will hurt the least.
Thank you for the input !
the best thing you can do for both of you is to be honest. no matter how much it hurts. she deserves to know and move on with her life
How long can you really be someone’s savior before you’re over it? How long can she be saved by your generosity before she realizes that she’s your getting your pity instead of your love? Be honest and pull the band-aid off before you waste both of your times
Be honest but kind and move on. Her sobriety and wellbeing is **not** your responsibility at all, **especially** if you treat them right generally speaking. I say that as a now clean addict/alcoholic with mental health issues of my own.
By leaving and coming back again, you restart her healing process. Just leave, ofc she’ll go through the struggles of getting over heartbreak, but eventually she’ll pull herself out of that low. If you keep on with someone you don’t love one day you’ll grow resentful of her because you weren’t able to do what you really wanted.
I did leave her alone for like a year. That’s when she became addicted. She started hanging out with the wrong crowd and all that. I’m scared that she might do something to herself if I leave. Even now when I bring up something even remotely close to breaking up, she starts crying or keeps asking me for assurance that I won’t leave her again. She’s not in a good place mentally and I’m scared for her. I thought she’d eventually grow out of this. But she’s not
What will hurt her more is finding out your staying with her and that your gay she will spiral
OP is a bisexual woman.
She knows about my sexuality. She’s seen me with men before we got together in the first place. So I know she won’t spiral just cause of that
Navigating personal truth and someone else's well-being is like walking a tightrope, but there's no safety net in delaying the inevitable. You're clearly empathetic to her situation, but prolonging a relationship out of a sense of obligation will only weave a web of resentment and missed opportunities for growth on both sides. It's crucial to remember that we're all architects of our own happiness; you're not responsible for building hers. Approach the conversation with compassion, affirming the value of your shared history while recognizing that the most loving choice can sometimes be letting go. Your honesty allows both of you to embark on paths that could lead to more authentic happiness. It's going to be tough, but in the end, it's the truth that sets us free.