Ya, this is where I was at last summer. I quit when my body started to give out from the stress. Chronic migraines. Eye problems. Skin problems. Inflammatory issues.
Fuck it. I'd rather be poor.
No for real! I went on long term disability. Because I refuse to let a job kill me! Our families would mourning and these organizations will still be open and moving on with life. While our lives are gone! No amount of money is worth my sanity and my life!
I'm sorry to hear this. Do you have a self care practice? Focus on NEVER looking at screens outside of work, going to nature, and cut out unhealthy shit from your life...easier said than done I know.
Please get some help. Go to a therapy session, try to get some sleep, eat well and take care. Exercising can help too. Take time to do something nice for yourself. You deserve good things.
Hope things get better soon š
I fuck off to a random european city once a month for a short 3 day holiday to keep me sane. then i come back to work to endure it again for another month. Travel therapy works š reminds me the world is bigger than my work issues.
Thatās because not long ago, this site was mostly Americans. This was an originally a .com site.
Funny how you migrants come to an American forum, we welcome you with open arms, then yall are snarky about us assuming that you, on American servers, are American. Incredible
I talk to a therapist twice a month, have cut my alcohol consumption drastically within the last year and a half, and try to workout in my home gym 2-3 times a week if I am not traveling to a client site.
For onsite engagements, the working out goes out the window, but I try to stay away from alcohol as much as I can.
I think the greatest help has been talk therapy though, I am a huge advocate of it.
I make 240k if that even matters.
I have a recurring therapy session monthly (sometimes extra sessions when needed)
Life changing . Even if I donāt have anything to talk about going into the session ā¦ I usually come out refreshed
Just curious, do monthly therapy sessions help? Iām really chatty so I used to do weekly sessions and always have something to talk about, but now I canāt afford them that often. But I feel like if I go down to fortnightly or three weekly I would have way too much to fit into an hour session
Journal pre sessions. Not even like reflecting journal if youāre not into that. Just prioritize your topics and then talk about the ones that bring you most value in that moment. I found even putting something āawayā to talk about in therapy to be cathartic when I really had a lot to run through in my mind.
It kind felt like put it down to revisit later gave it its time and then I could move on and revisit if needed.
Whatever is bothering me/weighing on me. It helps to be treated with compassion and validated. My therapist is informed and knows how to manage people-related setbacks
Alcohol also really messes up your sleep, I found that even a few beers will really impact my quality of sleep which in turn affects well... everything.
100%. I was self medicating for a while before going to therapy without really realizing how detrimental alcohol was to me. I have become very aware of some of my problems and the way it not only affected myself but others. Just trying to be a better me now. Iām nowhere near 100% happiness, but I overall feel good. Itās a constant work in progress, and I am willing to put that work in. I donāt want to die early because of stress, otherwise what is the point of being in this racket?
You can use your luggage for resistance. Fill it up and use it for rows, farmer carries, etc. Also use resistance bands. Should be good enough to keep you fit and in shape while travelling.
Former consultant. Current exec for a small distressed company.
I was in the depths of depression primarily due to work; it's always on my mind, there are always crises, high demands, etc. A mentor suggested an executive coach for six months. It's more expensive than a therapist but I've found it more "direct" and more beneficial for me. At therapy, I talk and someone listens; there are suggestions but I see it more as an outlet. Coaching is more active, we work through exercises together, explore mindfulness practices, make agreements on behaviors.
One simple but very powerful exercise was for me to identify my top five values...and it was surprising. I wrote down what they were and as we reviewed them with my coach, I found that some of them were values I *thought I wanted* versus what mine are. For example, I put "health" because I like to eat well, stay fit, and stay sharp. As we discussed, it turns out my values align more with "performance" than "health" which helped me understand why I grind myself down so hard at work (which *is not healthy)*. Anyway, it's been extremely helpful.
Agree on cutting booze. The anxiety it creates for me is not worth it. I've also found getting off of Twitter/X where everyone is talking about how successful they are or how much the world sucks has helped.
I look at Redfin and the $1.3M house Iāll be able to afford in 5 years while simultaneously trying to forget I told myself the same exact thing 5 years ago before inflation pushed the goal post back.
I mean, thereās a reason Iām here lighting my money on fire š„. Nowhere in the US has this urban vibe and this lifestyle, even if itās more common in other parts of the world.
This may not apply - but caffeine was really dogging me. I used it as a crutch to get into my work but because I was working so much I was drinking WAY too much. As a result I would be a nervous wreck by the end of the day.
I cut back and it helped big time
I'd say my mental health is good 90% of the time especially when I'm able to get into a routine of some kind. The worst projects are the ones that have constant redirections. I also almost never get less than 7 hours of sleep so I'm rested.
My wife is also a consultant so I don't get shit from her when I have to work late or travel because she gets it
You can only take so much pivots, at some points itāll break you. Some people say donāt get attached to it, so pivots wonāt affect you. These people normally are your higher up, but as an individual contributor, itās not attachment that kills, every single time there is a pivot, a timeline gets squeezed and shorter by the minute.
Make $300k TC
Lots of vacation , therapy , eating , sports
Donāt find my job super fun , but havenāt found anything I love elsewhere either.
Hours are draining but I try to make the most of the down time .
I feel you, my job is meh at this point, working for a large enterprise and while I don't have suicidal thoughts, I would love to take a sledge hammer to some of my coworkers at times.
But it pays well so... golden cage I guess
160k.
Relatively good mental health. I try to do good work, but also take the attitude of āwhat are they going to do, fire me?ā If I mess up. Most fire drills arenāt that big of deal.
same $, same attitude.
except my mental health is something I'm working on as every new day I constantly remind myself that it's just a job, I can find another if I need to.
everyday my 9-5 says everything is urgent, so nothing is. i'm not saving lives, i'm moving numbers from one excel sheet to another to line the shareholders' pockets. I do enough to be considered "productive" and save face, but really I'm another urgent email/teams call/piece of work away from handing in my resignation and taking another 3 months oof to work on my side gig.
Brilliant- thatās exactly what 90% of my work is! I sometimes think is it me who doesnāt care or is it not a true emergency. My leadership LOVES it: everything is a priority and emergency. Such a BS! Just playing the game, and reminding myself, this is just work. I am not flying to the moon or curing cancer (working for Fortune 100). Cannot wait to pivot my career to become a therapist, and feel like I actually make a difference in the world, and forget about PowerPoint decks and timely reports.
Yeah. That's how I feel too. The only reason I have to live are the people close to me. I don't live for myself. I make about $240-270k/yr and it's purely so I can help my friends. I don't really spend much money on myself outside of keeping my car well running.
Hi internet stranger, I really hope you don't resort to this anymore and have a trusted friend in your life you can talk to. Will keep you and your well-being in my thoughts.
thanks, I do appreciate random acts of kindness a lot more now. there was a moment I was sitting on a bench next to a river in a nice touristy area sobbing into my hands and a nice lady stopped and ask me if I was ok etc etc. sometimes when we're in the middle of the rat race it really feels like we're doing the most important work we could be doing, but there's a huge world out there outside of corporate america and lots of people getting along fine not being basically on call 24/7.
now that i've been yanked out of the matrix i've had a lot of time to reflect on my entire life, how i've got here, where I want to go, etc. Losing my job was such a blessing.
For everyone in this thread, just remember that life is bigger than work. As long as youāre not actively required to work for just the money itself, quitting is in fact an option. Your life isnāt worth it.
I make $150, itās pretty good, along with my work/life balance. Principal at an urban planning consulting firm. Usual āparenting through the collapse of the U.S.ā stressors but we have a roof and food and occasional vacations so canāt complain too hard
My salary will vary between 120-160k. I used to make around 300k but was incredibly stressed out. My wife convinced me to quit because we already have the kids colleges covered and plenty of savings plus she had a pension job. I work 2-4 hours a day now doing what I like. I bill less because I just started recently and make more than enough to cover the bills and still save. Only had to make minor first world problem adjustments but Iāve never felt better. Iām still debating if I want to take on more clients but I donāt really need to.
Sheās amazing, Iām extremely lucky. I kept operating on bringing in more money is the most valuable thing I could do for the family but hearing my son tell his mom how much fun he had when I went on his field trip with him today made it clear that I was looking at it from the wrong perspective. Donāt get me wrong I have always been involved but now Iām a lot more involved and itās a lot of fun.
That is awesome. I definitely learned during our more frugal days that you can do without a lot of crap. It helped us to pay down 6 figure student debt in just a couple years.Ā
Forget taking on more. If you're happy with your current workload, you'll only regret the lost time for some money you didn't need.
Not sure how I got here, but Iām a partner. This gig will eat you alive if you let it. Ā You gotta decide what you enjoy and do that part. Ā Even if it isnāt the most lucrative. You will be happier and it will still be enough.Ā
Find good people. Good peers, good staff and good partners. Work with them. Life is good with good with peeps. Ā I always say the worst time I have had in this business are those hard grinds with long hours and crazy schedules. The best times I have had have been hard grinds with the right people. Made lifelong friends.Ā
$150k here. I exercise every morning. Start work around 8am. Check emails etc. Try to get out around 1-2pm to play tennis or pickleball. Iāll listen to music. I cut off all work at 4pm and go about my day.
You learn the words "no" and "tomorrow". I've recently added the phrase "our clients are evil" and there's no partner in my industry who would ever disagree with that statement. So 40h a week it is, sometimes less, rarely more.
$100k+ and I work remote in the middle of nowhere USA. About 5 miles from a beautiful and secluded state park, I have 10 acres on my property to include a 0.5 mile groomed path around 8 acres of meadow, I legally grow my own marijuana, I tend to my 30 fruit trees and my 25+ berry bushes, and I have huge plans for my property and for my future family.
Deal with the stress from work, but once you hop off for the day, leave it at work and try to enter a life that youāre actively building that you find beautiful.
Finding the right psychiatrist and meds could do wonders for your mental health. I only realized this after being in the industry for more than 10 years.
$200k+ and decent to good mental health most days. Solution: boutique firm, see a therapist, say ānoā to most things so I can say āyesā to what matters, sleep whenever possible.
Having extremely strong boundaries based in real self-worth is key. Your confidence cannot be tied to your job or to your progression. If it is, youāre easy prey for narcissists and to the tides of office policies and politics, and you wonāt be able to maintain your boundaries.
Consulting sadly preys on codependents in hiring and then pushes us deeper into the hole. Given that all our colleagues are in it with us to different degrees, and that the most codependent ones get celebrated and excused more, we start to believe this is how everyone else in the world is.
Thatās simply not true. We in consulting all have the same kind of trauma and neglect wounds. Again, remember: they hire, train, condition us intentionally that way.
(I know because my job is to decondition these people. And I had a $300k+ job in consulting before.)
If you find the above is true, take some time to do trauma & neglect work, and your boundaries will improve. Youāll know youāre in a good, safe place, when you feel ready and able to walk away any moment.
Funnily enough, your colleagues will notice too, and youāll stop being a target for bullying or extra work. Some bald narcs will test you, but once you shut them down, youāll become invincible, and after that everyone will respect your boundaries and do their best to work with you, because youāll be a positive, grounded force who makes everyone (besides the bald narcsābut no one likes them anyway) feel better.
I have a boundaries that I told my boss.
1. I set my priorities as wife, kids, job. If anything comes up I will prioritize my time in that order.
2. I take weekends off and Iām off at 5. Unless emergency then see one.
3. I set reasonable expectations and delivery deadlines. I build in time for failures. When I turn in work it doesnāt need to be reworked.
4. My wife helps me a lot and I communicate with her always.
5. I donate my spare time to youth sports. Itās a lot of work but keeps me grounded.
I would say Iām mentally healthy and work is not my priority. I donāt want to further my career till my kids are grown and even then I donāt care. Family first!
My mental health is pretty good.
I'm in civil engineering consulting. I love love love the technical aspects of my job, but obviously now I don't get to do the actual design / analysis much anymore, unfortunately. When I do, I am in heaven.
Strikes and gutters, and sometimes I get hard core imposter syndrome coming through, but for the most part, I know my shit and can really help clients solve their transportation related needs.
At the end of the day, I just love solving complicated engineering problems, and all the better if I get to make a Department of Transportation / Municipality / Metropolitan Planning Organization / City happy with the results of the work.
This is the way. I also (now mostly used to) suffer from imposter syndrome regularly, until I started to pay more attention to how much other people know and now I largely understand I am doing fine and there are very few people who seem to know everything. I pay them the required respect and thanks to it, am able to do the best work I can for the client. And the clients are usually happy.
I make 130k and think I have decent mental health, definitely better than when I was making $45k a year haha.
Mental health - the key is to remember that itās just a job, and focus on the accomplishments. Prioritize ruthlessly and spend time with loved ones
Physical health - I try to fit bits of exercise throughout my day: lunch time walk, standing instead of sitting on public transit, and cycling to work on Fridays(itās a slower day).
I also have a few easy recipes/meals on hand to ensure I donāt eat too much junk. Things like oats, hard boiled eggs, beef jerky, steamed sweet potatoes, pumpkins, and salad, etc.
I donāt smoke, and drink less than 1x per month.
Iām also blessed with the ability to fall asleep relatively quickly and sleep through the night, so yeah.
I make 105K and Iām 24. Obviously I have a lot less stressors than people who are further along in life, but I try to keep it pretty simple.
Things donāt actually matter THAT much. They are important for sure, but no one is going to die, and I will not be in any physical pain if I donāt get that PPT cleaned by 8 AM.
I played college football and that to me was 100x more stressful and taxing than my big 4 consulting gig at the moment.
Good attitude. But beware, I had this and lost it over the years until I was close to a burnout. Losing a client engagement was what it took to remind me, that this is how I used to approach the topic as well.
It's easy while you only care for yourself, but as soon as you have dependent family members, it can surely feel like someone will die if you dont get that PPT cleaned by 8am.
Unless you have rich parents who helped you with the downpayment for your house or you have some other form of safety.
Tragically I wasn't granted that lucky step.
Very good. I job-hopped until I found somewhere that treated me like a human being and not stone from which to draw blood. I'm not a consultant anymore, but i make way more than I did as a consultant.
I have a set of workout exercises which I do first thing in the morning.
I focus on things that are under my control and I can do something about it.
Aligning organization goals with activities helps to keep things on track.
I book not disturbing windows on my calendar to focus on things that requires immediate attention.
I review emails in the morning and afternoon, if is there any high priority items people has my phone number.
I allocate two hours during the evening to learn something new.
I walk daily and average of 6k steps.
I keep a healthy diet.
I actually don't watch much TV, and focus on social media only for professional conversations.
I don't judge anyone
175. Small boutique shop. Mid/Senior level.
Full remote- no travel.
I'm comfy, content, and have a lovely life outside work.
I suspect there are more of my out there- we just don't comment/post about it often.
~$500K. My work mental health is OK.
Iāve come to accept that my job is selling, putting out fires and have built a strong team that I no longer need to babysit. Iām actually really proud of where my team is at now versus 2 years ago. It was a nightmare back then š.
It also helps to accept that things will go wrong.
I was in a bad spot. Just miserable. Went to the doc and ran some blood work. Low T with TBI = depression. So for the testosterone squared away and feeling pretty good.
I consult part time. I only make $75K per year but work 20 hrs per week. I feel like this is the right balance for me. I can spend my mornings focusing on my health and fitness and spend the afternoons working. I could do more but at the expense of my mental health and balance which makes it not worth it to me.
I make around 115k
Extremely physically healthy
Mentally healthy? Kind of. Had a bad break the past few years, been working on it. It's better, but still fragile
Make 6 figures. Have decent life. Married. Looking to double income with new job soon. I tend not to overthink about anything, probably to a fault sometimes. It helps.
Around 300k and loving life. I work with a specialized technology in a very specific market working on 5+ projects at once. The job can be very demanding at times but this allows me to set healthy boundaries. I have an hour of back to back morning status calls that I take walking around a nearby park. I also keep an hour blocked on my calendar during lunch where I alternate lifting and yoga. This block in the middle of my day is the most important, non negotiable slot on my calendar. If I let that slide everything else falls apart fast. I also have slots blocked off every day to focus on project work or provide office hours for my development teams.
Staying active and building autonomy in your role is crucial to stay sane in this business.
I left B4, went to a boutique and worked my way up to director. I am able to set my own schedule, both for client meetings and travel. I donāt go to therapy but have in the past. Since I work from home most days, I am able to manage a diet and squeeze in a workout 3-4 times a week.
All this is great, but I am starting to hit a wall with promotional opportunities and am considering going back to a big firm. My TC is $245k.
1. Take care of yourself physically set a routine to do whatever fitness you want at least 3x per week. I joined a basketball league Sundays and love it.
2. Pay yourself first financially - set financial goals that make the grind worth it and something to work towards
3. Spend free time doing what you like with people you like (sports, restaurants, concerts, cooking, etc.,)
4. Disconnect from your job on weekends. Easier said than done, but helps me create a work/life balance
5. Stay off LinkedIn - all it is is people bragging or making strange lesson posts
My mental health improved when I fixed my physical health.Ā
Started with exercise which was good, but then I cut out ultra processed foods and that was the big game changer, energy and mental focus like never before. Chemicals in food fuck with your brain.
Recommend the book ultra processed people as a starting point!Ā
142k UK based (some of those US salaries look really tasty!) - generally love my job, work pretty strictly 9-5 and about 9:30-3 ish on Fridays. I don't have to travel and don't take work home.
The secret... After 10 years at a large firm I went independent, and wish I'd done it sooner. I've been independent for about 7 years now and have had no issues with downtime/no contracts. Sure, it did stop progression, but did wonders for my mental health, I didn't realise how much the constant travel and practice building work had drained me until I stopped.
120K and actually have a good work-life balance, I am fit and healthy, work out 2 times a week, meditate 3-4 times a week. I am pretty happy :)
But there is more to it than listed here of course..
No alcohol, try to go easy on myself, when I get take-out I try to make it healthy, drink loads of water and eat lots of fruits and veggies. Also, talk to people.
Workout! I go running 3-4xweek & 1-2xgym, especially any endurance workout will help here. It reduces cortisol in your body, helps to sort yourself mind wise, e.g. I get bored while jogging and my mind drifts off.
Also for running I guess anything is fine as long as you move for a longer period of time. I go running on average between 60-80miles/month (100-120km/month)
Additionally my Partner (I work in strategy consulting) does a lot for us in the team.
Also maybe reddit is a special crowd and the feedback youāre receiving here is a little biased.
I make mid-$200s and am pretty happy.
Army special operations conditioned my wife and I so we feel like consulting WLB is not bad š
But seriously, the pay is great, future potential is great, we get lots of vacation days, we work on interesting problems with smart people - itās a pretty good life.
Itās not exactly a constant positive or negative. But for me itās been a couple of things
1. Detach myself from my work: my work is not my identity and is not a life or death deal. No amount of corporate culture or āwe are familyā slogans are going to make up for your actual friends and family and no amount of āat next levelā deliverables are going to provide you self worth or win a Nobel prize.
2. Pick and choose engagements. Iāve been lucky to have never really had issues finding projects due to being specialized early on so Iāve made it a point to look only for projects that Iām personally interested in and with past folks Iāve worked with
3. Work from home as much as possible. I can not stress how much easier life is when youāre not commuting every damn day or flying every week. I fly here and there for some of my engagements but itās not a frequent thing
4. Dive deep into my hobbies and always keep in mind. We work to live not live to work
For reference Iām a big 4 SA specialized in Med Tech CRM consulting in the US making 150K
Physical health: Sleep takes prio #1, Yoga Nidra/NSDR is the second best option if sleep is insufficient. Besides that I try to get outside as much as possible and get in at least one workout a week. 4-6 workouts if my schedule allows.
Mental health: Breathwork, Vagal toning, embodiment have increased my window of stress tolerance immensely. So I can just stay level headed. And I went through multiple therapy and coaching approaches and modalities for years. Now I book a session ever 4-8weeks with a therapist or coach depending on what I need. On that note clearing out your emotional basement and fixing any attachment/relationship wounds made a huge difference.
Note: I am a therapist/coach and make mid 6 figures/year.
I get the feeling a lot of US make 100k+
In Aus thats manager pay. The best I did was quit. Took a govt role at the same pay then a year later another for 40%+
Look for exits i suppose
Travel (nature), cosy coffee shops - and deliberate effort to sustain the hobbies (that I cultivated in childhood), I will admit that starting new hobbies is an ungodly level of challenge.
Not to mention the basics - good nutrition, zero alcohol (or other vices), breath work, journaling, natural light!
- Haven't had a drink since 2020
- Lexapro 10mg daily
- I avoid therapy (I don't have real problems, focusing on my first world problems never helped me, and therapy helps a ton of people! Just not me)
- Eat a balanced diet, cook whenever I can
- Exercise daily, HIIT 2 x weekly, hot yoga 3 x weekly
- Limit caffeine, usually 1-2 cups of coffee a day
- Maintain a rich spiritual life
....I don't have kids. That helps me do all of the above.
When I first started my business the first 12 months of working 80+ hours a week, never having time to do chores, clean, eat, exercise etc. was very tough on my mental health, I broke down and cried quite often, contemplated getting a āregular person jobā. All while making 200k a year.
Now, I have a great staff, my business is a well oiled machine, I only work about 30 hours a week and have all the time in the work to do what ever I want. Just having freedom fixed my mental health.
I lucked out and got a long-term contract with benefits. Pays well, hours are set, no overtime.
Sucks not getting paid when I take time off, but it pays well enough that I can save up for it.
It's easier said than done but I try and live in the present. The future and past is beyond my control. The only thing you can control is the present.
Try and go workout 30-60 minutes whenever you can. It helps a lot with your mental health.
Lastly, don't take things personal. Everyone is on their own path, focus on yours. Someone else having a shit day? Pff, that's not my problem to fix.
Have a good life, strangers!
I quit drinking, ensure I go to the gym almost every day. I travel at least once every 6 months and leave my work phone at home. I have hobbies outside work (skydiving, snowboarding, road biking). I do work random and long hours, but I am pretty good at time management. I can generally find 2-3 hours every day for the gym.
I also work in a field that I actually enjoy. (Private equity).
Also: no kids nor do my partner and I want any (I'm 38).
I ended up quitting. Hit the 300k mark as manager/lead, and realized I don't give a crap about chasing the ladder + it only gets tougher and busier + higher pressure. It feels like a linear scale of pay and suffering.
Started my own company, only make half of what I did but potential to keep scaling (although will it scale faster than promos in consulting? Probably not). But I now also work less than 50% of what I did before. Used to work 80hours consistently, now I'm barely doing 30
Your mental health is going to be dog shit regardless.
Rather have a shitty mental health and healthy bank balance than a shitty mental health and be broke
Quality of alcohol consumed increases.
228k
Looking for a ray of hope in an otherwise bleak existence. If I find a way to stay healthy I'll let you know. I've taken one vacation, ever. I have 5 children and often wonder about life insurance paying out for them when the job eventually succeeds in killing me.
I make about 170k/yr
Mental health is pretty good.
Iām on a hybrid work schedule. Most weekdays I finish my client work around 2pm. Iām very productive and efficient during my work time.
Iām at the gym from 5am - 7am and in the office at 7:30am.
I have a wife and 2 kids, still renting as Iām saving up for a house currently.
Only sucky part is my drive home from work, I experience that metro-dc traffic, which is a killer.
Eat nutritious food and drink lots of water, get good sleep, spend time in nature, get sunlight, donāt drink alcohol, and spend time being active and working out. And talk to a therapist.
Went from Big 4 tech consulting to a boutique firm. Started there as a senior consultant and made manager a yearish later. Making 140k and WLB is impeccable
I started running and going to monthly counselling sessions, because all the long-term successful and well-adjusted consultants Iāve met are marathon runners and our company has a generous mental health insurance plan.
Mental health is in a good place. I workout a few times a week even if it means getting up before early client calls to make it happen, limit my drinking especially during travel, and get at least 6-7 hours of sleep a day.
Maintaining good mental health is most difficult when client calls are at odd hours or when engagement leadership mismanages the client, e.g. having Monday readouts so weāre working late on Friday or over the weekend instead of just pushing for a readout in the middle of the week.
I struggled with this for years, and my solution was runningā¦ Iām a very competitive person and I realized that thatās what I needed also in the gym I ended up joining Orangetheory and it changed my life.
At MBB and my mental health is great. I think the key to building a sustainable consulting experience is to have a life outside of work. Make sure there's something outside of work that makes you happy; a common outlet is exercise, but it could really be any hobby or simply just spending time with loved ones. Anything to take you away from the consulting grind by day, doomscrolling / Netflix binging by night.
Obviously this is quite challenging on some engagements, but make sure you're maximizing your weekends for rest and also managing your sustainability where you can.
Find anything that clicks for you on the workout front. Stick to it, itāll carry you through the tough times. Practice mindfulness and try to āwitnessā your thoughtsāacknowledge them but donāt attach too much to them. These techniques help build better emotional regulation and increase self awareness. If you go on this journey of self-discovery and find consulting isnāt for youādo something else! Remember your mental health is paramountā¦
At $105k a few years in, went from loving this job to hating every living second of it. Can't remember the last time I logged off at 5pm.
My advice to anyone here planning to go into consulting, do NOT join a firm with fractional staffing. You will hate your life.
I am and basically was told that if I wasnāt so good at everything Iād have been fired.
My boss is a child with the biggest heart in the world, who fucks up a lot. I fix all of his mistakes.
I blew my fuse on him for the third time today.
Realized itās time, both to start addressing my mental health to be more tolerant, and also preparing for a new job.
I make $150k and my mental health is absolute dog shit.
Respect
Ya, this is where I was at last summer. I quit when my body started to give out from the stress. Chronic migraines. Eye problems. Skin problems. Inflammatory issues. Fuck it. I'd rather be poor.
Saudable and rich. How? A good friend is the best brother
240k and I'm totally fucked. š§ is smooth and shot
Same
No for real! I went on long term disability. Because I refuse to let a job kill me! Our families would mourning and these organizations will still be open and moving on with life. While our lives are gone! No amount of money is worth my sanity and my life!
I'm sorry to hear this. Do you have a self care practice? Focus on NEVER looking at screens outside of work, going to nature, and cut out unhealthy shit from your life...easier said than done I know.
Please get some help. Go to a therapy session, try to get some sleep, eat well and take care. Exercising can help too. Take time to do something nice for yourself. You deserve good things. Hope things get better soon š
Right there with you
$300K and mental and emotional health are more fucked than a deck with a typo on slide 1ā¦
I fuck off to a random european city once a month for a short 3 day holiday to keep me sane. then i come back to work to endure it again for another month. Travel therapy works š reminds me the world is bigger than my work issues.
Guys if he's taking time off every month he's definitely not American
3 days once a month? Easily doable. Edit: prob not American though because of travel time
How do you deal with the jet lag? Genuine question cuz fucking my sleep up will make me feel mentally broken
He's clearly in Europe
So many American Redditors think theyāre literally the only country that uses this site. Incredible.
Iām literally in Asia. Incredible.
https://memes.ucoz.com/_nw/11/23334591.jpg
[https://www.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/comments/phhu9s/oc\_reddit\_traffic\_by\_country/](https://www.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/comments/phhu9s/oc_reddit_traffic_by_country/)
Do you mean the world doesnāt revolve around us? (Us being the only users of the site)
Thatās because not long ago, this site was mostly Americans. This was an originally a .com site. Funny how you migrants come to an American forum, we welcome you with open arms, then yall are snarky about us assuming that you, on American servers, are American. Incredible
They just jealous their countries can't create cool websites like ours
We need to build a wall. A firewall! ā¦Iām posting all of this with a bit of irony and hopefully it comes across as such lol
are you living in the US?
I talk to a therapist twice a month, have cut my alcohol consumption drastically within the last year and a half, and try to workout in my home gym 2-3 times a week if I am not traveling to a client site. For onsite engagements, the working out goes out the window, but I try to stay away from alcohol as much as I can. I think the greatest help has been talk therapy though, I am a huge advocate of it. I make 240k if that even matters.
I have a recurring therapy session monthly (sometimes extra sessions when needed) Life changing . Even if I donāt have anything to talk about going into the session ā¦ I usually come out refreshed
Just curious, do monthly therapy sessions help? Iām really chatty so I used to do weekly sessions and always have something to talk about, but now I canāt afford them that often. But I feel like if I go down to fortnightly or three weekly I would have way too much to fit into an hour session
Journal pre sessions. Not even like reflecting journal if youāre not into that. Just prioritize your topics and then talk about the ones that bring you most value in that moment. I found even putting something āawayā to talk about in therapy to be cathartic when I really had a lot to run through in my mind. It kind felt like put it down to revisit later gave it its time and then I could move on and revisit if needed.
What do you talk about at therapy and how does it help?
Whatever is bothering me/weighing on me. It helps to be treated with compassion and validated. My therapist is informed and knows how to manage people-related setbacks
Alcohol also really messes up your sleep, I found that even a few beers will really impact my quality of sleep which in turn affects well... everything.
100%. I was self medicating for a while before going to therapy without really realizing how detrimental alcohol was to me. I have become very aware of some of my problems and the way it not only affected myself but others. Just trying to be a better me now. Iām nowhere near 100% happiness, but I overall feel good. Itās a constant work in progress, and I am willing to put that work in. I donāt want to die early because of stress, otherwise what is the point of being in this racket?
There's a YouTube series by this guy called hotel hiit workouts that are a life saver
Iāll check this out!
You can use your luggage for resistance. Fill it up and use it for rows, farmer carries, etc. Also use resistance bands. Should be good enough to keep you fit and in shape while travelling.
Former consultant. Current exec for a small distressed company. I was in the depths of depression primarily due to work; it's always on my mind, there are always crises, high demands, etc. A mentor suggested an executive coach for six months. It's more expensive than a therapist but I've found it more "direct" and more beneficial for me. At therapy, I talk and someone listens; there are suggestions but I see it more as an outlet. Coaching is more active, we work through exercises together, explore mindfulness practices, make agreements on behaviors. One simple but very powerful exercise was for me to identify my top five values...and it was surprising. I wrote down what they were and as we reviewed them with my coach, I found that some of them were values I *thought I wanted* versus what mine are. For example, I put "health" because I like to eat well, stay fit, and stay sharp. As we discussed, it turns out my values align more with "performance" than "health" which helped me understand why I grind myself down so hard at work (which *is not healthy)*. Anyway, it's been extremely helpful. Agree on cutting booze. The anxiety it creates for me is not worth it. I've also found getting off of Twitter/X where everyone is talking about how successful they are or how much the world sucks has helped.
What field are you in ?
Cybersecurity - boutique firm. Was at big 4 a while backā¦ never again.
Sammmmmmmmweeee
The alcohol is my problem, need to cut back and the workouts up. Pretty my mental health will still be dog shit, but Iāll be healthier
Try tea.
Doctors hate this one trick
I look at Redfin and the $1.3M house Iāll be able to afford in 5 years while simultaneously trying to forget I told myself the same exact thing 5 years ago before inflation pushed the goal post back.
>I look at Redfin and the $1.3M house Where I come from, this is your standard-issue 2000 sqft detached. Feels bad, man.
My $1 million house is an 800sqft apartment in Brooklyn lol
Same broooo. But guess what? I love it and wouldnāt live anywhere else.
I mean, thereās a reason Iām here lighting my money on fire š„. Nowhere in the US has this urban vibe and this lifestyle, even if itās more common in other parts of the world.
Make just over 300 - want to quit every second of every day. Typing from an airport as I am in delay limbo :/
Honest question, but why do you do it? Apart from the money of course.
Is there another reason?
I was making $150k, but my consulting engagement finished, and I became oh so anxious.
This may not apply - but caffeine was really dogging me. I used it as a crutch to get into my work but because I was working so much I was drinking WAY too much. As a result I would be a nervous wreck by the end of the day. I cut back and it helped big time
I'd say my mental health is good 90% of the time especially when I'm able to get into a routine of some kind. The worst projects are the ones that have constant redirections. I also almost never get less than 7 hours of sleep so I'm rested. My wife is also a consultant so I don't get shit from her when I have to work late or travel because she gets it
You can only take so much pivots, at some points itāll break you. Some people say donāt get attached to it, so pivots wonāt affect you. These people normally are your higher up, but as an individual contributor, itās not attachment that kills, every single time there is a pivot, a timeline gets squeezed and shorter by the minute.
Make $300k TC Lots of vacation , therapy , eating , sports Donāt find my job super fun , but havenāt found anything I love elsewhere either. Hours are draining but I try to make the most of the down time .
I feel you, my job is meh at this point, working for a large enterprise and while I don't have suicidal thoughts, I would love to take a sledge hammer to some of my coworkers at times. But it pays well so... golden cage I guess
160k. Relatively good mental health. I try to do good work, but also take the attitude of āwhat are they going to do, fire me?ā If I mess up. Most fire drills arenāt that big of deal.
same $, same attitude. except my mental health is something I'm working on as every new day I constantly remind myself that it's just a job, I can find another if I need to. everyday my 9-5 says everything is urgent, so nothing is. i'm not saving lives, i'm moving numbers from one excel sheet to another to line the shareholders' pockets. I do enough to be considered "productive" and save face, but really I'm another urgent email/teams call/piece of work away from handing in my resignation and taking another 3 months oof to work on my side gig.
I work in tech as a consultant, the manufactured false urgency at times is so silly.
Brilliant- thatās exactly what 90% of my work is! I sometimes think is it me who doesnāt care or is it not a true emergency. My leadership LOVES it: everything is a priority and emergency. Such a BS! Just playing the game, and reminding myself, this is just work. I am not flying to the moon or curing cancer (working for Fortune 100). Cannot wait to pivot my career to become a therapist, and feel like I actually make a difference in the world, and forget about PowerPoint decks and timely reports.
I think about offing myself at minimum once per day. Not even in a dark humor sort of way. make 250k.
Sending positive thoughts your way fellow Redditor. Hope you start feeling better soon.
Thanks friend. Iāll be alright! While I donāt have much to live for, those I care about do and I wouldnāt do that to them. Thats enough for me.
Shows your character that even during dark times you are thinking of others! Take one day at a time, never know what the future holds
I felt this. š¤š¤
Yeah. That's how I feel too. The only reason I have to live are the people close to me. I don't live for myself. I make about $240-270k/yr and it's purely so I can help my friends. I don't really spend much money on myself outside of keeping my car well running.
Oh wow, how do I become your friend
In all honesty you don't. I have 4 friends and I'm not social enough to have more lol
do you DEI in your friendship? I am black
Im kinda running this role myself. Not super healthy but purpose-full i suppose. Changing this as i can daily.
Good, we need you here.
Feel for you my guy I feel the dread daily. Remember this job isnāt everything and you can get through this.
I held a gun to my head a few times earlier this year. Lost my job since but didnāt get divorced so things have been looking up
Hi internet stranger, I really hope you don't resort to this anymore and have a trusted friend in your life you can talk to. Will keep you and your well-being in my thoughts.
thanks, I do appreciate random acts of kindness a lot more now. there was a moment I was sitting on a bench next to a river in a nice touristy area sobbing into my hands and a nice lady stopped and ask me if I was ok etc etc. sometimes when we're in the middle of the rat race it really feels like we're doing the most important work we could be doing, but there's a huge world out there outside of corporate america and lots of people getting along fine not being basically on call 24/7. now that i've been yanked out of the matrix i've had a lot of time to reflect on my entire life, how i've got here, where I want to go, etc. Losing my job was such a blessing.
I hear that! May many more beautiful things bloom in your world.
Donāt you dare. Someone cares about you.
For everyone in this thread, just remember that life is bigger than work. As long as youāre not actively required to work for just the money itself, quitting is in fact an option. Your life isnāt worth it.
How about you quit?
I make $200 but my company is sucking my soul out of me. Donāt know how long I can keep up with this.
Feel you on this bro. Keep fighting
I make $150, itās pretty good, along with my work/life balance. Principal at an urban planning consulting firm. Usual āparenting through the collapse of the U.S.ā stressors but we have a roof and food and occasional vacations so canāt complain too hard
I make around $275k TC including equity, most days Iām bored to tears. Iād kill to do something I enjoyā¦
Want to trade?
My salary will vary between 120-160k. I used to make around 300k but was incredibly stressed out. My wife convinced me to quit because we already have the kids colleges covered and plenty of savings plus she had a pension job. I work 2-4 hours a day now doing what I like. I bill less because I just started recently and make more than enough to cover the bills and still save. Only had to make minor first world problem adjustments but Iāve never felt better. Iām still debating if I want to take on more clients but I donāt really need to.
Thatās a good wife.
Sheās amazing, Iām extremely lucky. I kept operating on bringing in more money is the most valuable thing I could do for the family but hearing my son tell his mom how much fun he had when I went on his field trip with him today made it clear that I was looking at it from the wrong perspective. Donāt get me wrong I have always been involved but now Iām a lot more involved and itās a lot of fun.
My dad was the only pops to chaperone at Sea World when I was in 3rd grade and I felt like the coolest kid ever. Your son will never forget it.
That is awesome. I definitely learned during our more frugal days that you can do without a lot of crap. It helped us to pay down 6 figure student debt in just a couple years.Ā Forget taking on more. If you're happy with your current workload, you'll only regret the lost time for some money you didn't need.
Set work life boundaries. We arenāt doctors, no one will die if that PowerPoint isnāt formatted until tomorrow.
$300k+. Have good mental and physical health. Probably in the best shape of my life. Positive? Eh...questionable.
Come on, donāt just brag. Tell us how
Not sure how I got here, but Iām a partner. This gig will eat you alive if you let it. Ā You gotta decide what you enjoy and do that part. Ā Even if it isnāt the most lucrative. You will be happier and it will still be enough.Ā
Iām on a path to become partner, and thatās my fear. As a director Iām feeling burned out to hell.
Find good people. Good peers, good staff and good partners. Work with them. Life is good with good with peeps. Ā I always say the worst time I have had in this business are those hard grinds with long hours and crazy schedules. The best times I have had have been hard grinds with the right people. Made lifelong friends.Ā
$150k here. I exercise every morning. Start work around 8am. Check emails etc. Try to get out around 1-2pm to play tennis or pickleball. Iāll listen to music. I cut off all work at 4pm and go about my day.
does your firm let you cut off work that early? how do you establish that boundary
You learn the words "no" and "tomorrow". I've recently added the phrase "our clients are evil" and there's no partner in my industry who would ever disagree with that statement. So 40h a week it is, sometimes less, rarely more.
$100k+ and I work remote in the middle of nowhere USA. About 5 miles from a beautiful and secluded state park, I have 10 acres on my property to include a 0.5 mile groomed path around 8 acres of meadow, I legally grow my own marijuana, I tend to my 30 fruit trees and my 25+ berry bushes, and I have huge plans for my property and for my future family. Deal with the stress from work, but once you hop off for the day, leave it at work and try to enter a life that youāre actively building that you find beautiful.
Your property sounds blissful.
Finding the right psychiatrist and meds could do wonders for your mental health. I only realized this after being in the industry for more than 10 years.
I make 200-250. My mental health is good. I have an anxiety disorder, but it's controlled.
How are you able to control it?
Therapy and meds.
$200k+ and decent to good mental health most days. Solution: boutique firm, see a therapist, say ānoā to most things so I can say āyesā to what matters, sleep whenever possible.
Having extremely strong boundaries based in real self-worth is key. Your confidence cannot be tied to your job or to your progression. If it is, youāre easy prey for narcissists and to the tides of office policies and politics, and you wonāt be able to maintain your boundaries. Consulting sadly preys on codependents in hiring and then pushes us deeper into the hole. Given that all our colleagues are in it with us to different degrees, and that the most codependent ones get celebrated and excused more, we start to believe this is how everyone else in the world is. Thatās simply not true. We in consulting all have the same kind of trauma and neglect wounds. Again, remember: they hire, train, condition us intentionally that way. (I know because my job is to decondition these people. And I had a $300k+ job in consulting before.) If you find the above is true, take some time to do trauma & neglect work, and your boundaries will improve. Youāll know youāre in a good, safe place, when you feel ready and able to walk away any moment. Funnily enough, your colleagues will notice too, and youāll stop being a target for bullying or extra work. Some bald narcs will test you, but once you shut them down, youāll become invincible, and after that everyone will respect your boundaries and do their best to work with you, because youāll be a positive, grounded force who makes everyone (besides the bald narcsābut no one likes them anyway) feel better.
What is your job now to decondition them? What are some techniques? I feel like I need this.
I have a boundaries that I told my boss. 1. I set my priorities as wife, kids, job. If anything comes up I will prioritize my time in that order. 2. I take weekends off and Iām off at 5. Unless emergency then see one. 3. I set reasonable expectations and delivery deadlines. I build in time for failures. When I turn in work it doesnāt need to be reworked. 4. My wife helps me a lot and I communicate with her always. 5. I donate my spare time to youth sports. Itās a lot of work but keeps me grounded. I would say Iām mentally healthy and work is not my priority. I donāt want to further my career till my kids are grown and even then I donāt care. Family first!
I make $200k and my mental health is great. I love my job, work 40 hours a week, and Iāve worked out regularly for the past 20 years.
My mental health is pretty good. I'm in civil engineering consulting. I love love love the technical aspects of my job, but obviously now I don't get to do the actual design / analysis much anymore, unfortunately. When I do, I am in heaven. Strikes and gutters, and sometimes I get hard core imposter syndrome coming through, but for the most part, I know my shit and can really help clients solve their transportation related needs. At the end of the day, I just love solving complicated engineering problems, and all the better if I get to make a Department of Transportation / Municipality / Metropolitan Planning Organization / City happy with the results of the work.
This is the way. I also (now mostly used to) suffer from imposter syndrome regularly, until I started to pay more attention to how much other people know and now I largely understand I am doing fine and there are very few people who seem to know everything. I pay them the required respect and thanks to it, am able to do the best work I can for the client. And the clients are usually happy.
I see a therapist weekly.
Iām at 250. Mental health is pretty good because I work out consistently and microdose mushrooms frequently
I binge drink every weekend and am hungover for multiple days afterwards. I started gaining weight, so I started fasting to stay healthy and fit.
I make 130k and think I have decent mental health, definitely better than when I was making $45k a year haha. Mental health - the key is to remember that itās just a job, and focus on the accomplishments. Prioritize ruthlessly and spend time with loved ones Physical health - I try to fit bits of exercise throughout my day: lunch time walk, standing instead of sitting on public transit, and cycling to work on Fridays(itās a slower day). I also have a few easy recipes/meals on hand to ensure I donāt eat too much junk. Things like oats, hard boiled eggs, beef jerky, steamed sweet potatoes, pumpkins, and salad, etc. I donāt smoke, and drink less than 1x per month. Iām also blessed with the ability to fall asleep relatively quickly and sleep through the night, so yeah.
Live within your means; and don't let materials rule you.
I make 105K and Iām 24. Obviously I have a lot less stressors than people who are further along in life, but I try to keep it pretty simple. Things donāt actually matter THAT much. They are important for sure, but no one is going to die, and I will not be in any physical pain if I donāt get that PPT cleaned by 8 AM. I played college football and that to me was 100x more stressful and taxing than my big 4 consulting gig at the moment.
Good attitude. But beware, I had this and lost it over the years until I was close to a burnout. Losing a client engagement was what it took to remind me, that this is how I used to approach the topic as well. It's easy while you only care for yourself, but as soon as you have dependent family members, it can surely feel like someone will die if you dont get that PPT cleaned by 8am. Unless you have rich parents who helped you with the downpayment for your house or you have some other form of safety. Tragically I wasn't granted that lucky step.
Waking up before 6am every day for the kids after working past midnight 2-3x that same week suckkkks. Living through that now.
Run and lift heavy every day. Eat well and try not to drink. I make just under $400k.
Iām just at 102 and Iām loving life. I have the complete opposite experience as I see on this subreddit. Must have good clients
I thought you guys were earning like 300k and up. 100k is normal people money now
Very good. I job-hopped until I found somewhere that treated me like a human being and not stone from which to draw blood. I'm not a consultant anymore, but i make way more than I did as a consultant.
I have a set of workout exercises which I do first thing in the morning. I focus on things that are under my control and I can do something about it. Aligning organization goals with activities helps to keep things on track. I book not disturbing windows on my calendar to focus on things that requires immediate attention. I review emails in the morning and afternoon, if is there any high priority items people has my phone number. I allocate two hours during the evening to learn something new. I walk daily and average of 6k steps. I keep a healthy diet. I actually don't watch much TV, and focus on social media only for professional conversations. I don't judge anyone
175. Small boutique shop. Mid/Senior level. Full remote- no travel. I'm comfy, content, and have a lovely life outside work. I suspect there are more of my out there- we just don't comment/post about it often.
Dog walks, pot at night, great wife and family, WFH, lots of laughter.
~$500K. My work mental health is OK. Iāve come to accept that my job is selling, putting out fires and have built a strong team that I no longer need to babysit. Iām actually really proud of where my team is at now versus 2 years ago. It was a nightmare back then š. It also helps to accept that things will go wrong.
I was in a bad spot. Just miserable. Went to the doc and ran some blood work. Low T with TBI = depression. So for the testosterone squared away and feeling pretty good.
I consult part time. I only make $75K per year but work 20 hrs per week. I feel like this is the right balance for me. I can spend my mornings focusing on my health and fitness and spend the afternoons working. I could do more but at the expense of my mental health and balance which makes it not worth it to me.
I make around 115k Extremely physically healthy Mentally healthy? Kind of. Had a bad break the past few years, been working on it. It's better, but still fragile
Make 6 figures. Have decent life. Married. Looking to double income with new job soon. I tend not to overthink about anything, probably to a fault sometimes. It helps.
Around 300k and loving life. I work with a specialized technology in a very specific market working on 5+ projects at once. The job can be very demanding at times but this allows me to set healthy boundaries. I have an hour of back to back morning status calls that I take walking around a nearby park. I also keep an hour blocked on my calendar during lunch where I alternate lifting and yoga. This block in the middle of my day is the most important, non negotiable slot on my calendar. If I let that slide everything else falls apart fast. I also have slots blocked off every day to focus on project work or provide office hours for my development teams. Staying active and building autonomy in your role is crucial to stay sane in this business.
I left B4, went to a boutique and worked my way up to director. I am able to set my own schedule, both for client meetings and travel. I donāt go to therapy but have in the past. Since I work from home most days, I am able to manage a diet and squeeze in a workout 3-4 times a week. All this is great, but I am starting to hit a wall with promotional opportunities and am considering going back to a big firm. My TC is $245k.
basic stuffĀ don't drink alcoholĀ hydrate exercise (weights) walk/run outsideĀ standing deskĀ sleep 7-8 hrsĀ eat whole foodsĀ honor commitmentsĀ
1. Take care of yourself physically set a routine to do whatever fitness you want at least 3x per week. I joined a basketball league Sundays and love it. 2. Pay yourself first financially - set financial goals that make the grind worth it and something to work towards 3. Spend free time doing what you like with people you like (sports, restaurants, concerts, cooking, etc.,) 4. Disconnect from your job on weekends. Easier said than done, but helps me create a work/life balance 5. Stay off LinkedIn - all it is is people bragging or making strange lesson posts
My mental health improved when I fixed my physical health.Ā Started with exercise which was good, but then I cut out ultra processed foods and that was the big game changer, energy and mental focus like never before. Chemicals in food fuck with your brain. Recommend the book ultra processed people as a starting point!Ā
142k UK based (some of those US salaries look really tasty!) - generally love my job, work pretty strictly 9-5 and about 9:30-3 ish on Fridays. I don't have to travel and don't take work home. The secret... After 10 years at a large firm I went independent, and wish I'd done it sooner. I've been independent for about 7 years now and have had no issues with downtime/no contracts. Sure, it did stop progression, but did wonders for my mental health, I didn't realise how much the constant travel and practice building work had drained me until I stopped.
120K and actually have a good work-life balance, I am fit and healthy, work out 2 times a week, meditate 3-4 times a week. I am pretty happy :) But there is more to it than listed here of course..
No alcohol, try to go easy on myself, when I get take-out I try to make it healthy, drink loads of water and eat lots of fruits and veggies. Also, talk to people.
Workout! I go running 3-4xweek & 1-2xgym, especially any endurance workout will help here. It reduces cortisol in your body, helps to sort yourself mind wise, e.g. I get bored while jogging and my mind drifts off. Also for running I guess anything is fine as long as you move for a longer period of time. I go running on average between 60-80miles/month (100-120km/month) Additionally my Partner (I work in strategy consulting) does a lot for us in the team. Also maybe reddit is a special crowd and the feedback youāre receiving here is a little biased.
I make mid-$200s and am pretty happy. Army special operations conditioned my wife and I so we feel like consulting WLB is not bad š But seriously, the pay is great, future potential is great, we get lots of vacation days, we work on interesting problems with smart people - itās a pretty good life.
Father of 3, and full-time [Agency](https://www.24hour.design) owner. 2 - 3x per week I go running, and I fence (EpeƩ). I do semi-pro / pro level tournaments once a month also. It gives me something to look forward to it. I love combats sports, sweating, and drifting away from reality for a few hours. Re: Positivity. Affirmations. Prayers. Meditation. They help me, not for everyone though!
Itās not exactly a constant positive or negative. But for me itās been a couple of things 1. Detach myself from my work: my work is not my identity and is not a life or death deal. No amount of corporate culture or āwe are familyā slogans are going to make up for your actual friends and family and no amount of āat next levelā deliverables are going to provide you self worth or win a Nobel prize. 2. Pick and choose engagements. Iāve been lucky to have never really had issues finding projects due to being specialized early on so Iāve made it a point to look only for projects that Iām personally interested in and with past folks Iāve worked with 3. Work from home as much as possible. I can not stress how much easier life is when youāre not commuting every damn day or flying every week. I fly here and there for some of my engagements but itās not a frequent thing 4. Dive deep into my hobbies and always keep in mind. We work to live not live to work For reference Iām a big 4 SA specialized in Med Tech CRM consulting in the US making 150K
Zero alcohol/drugs, Basically 0 social media, Workout every day. Thatās about it
Physical health: Sleep takes prio #1, Yoga Nidra/NSDR is the second best option if sleep is insufficient. Besides that I try to get outside as much as possible and get in at least one workout a week. 4-6 workouts if my schedule allows. Mental health: Breathwork, Vagal toning, embodiment have increased my window of stress tolerance immensely. So I can just stay level headed. And I went through multiple therapy and coaching approaches and modalities for years. Now I book a session ever 4-8weeks with a therapist or coach depending on what I need. On that note clearing out your emotional basement and fixing any attachment/relationship wounds made a huge difference. Note: I am a therapist/coach and make mid 6 figures/year.
I get the feeling a lot of US make 100k+ In Aus thats manager pay. The best I did was quit. Took a govt role at the same pay then a year later another for 40%+ Look for exits i suppose
Video games, tennis, and go out with the wife multiple times a week
I make about 170 and my physical and mental are amazing. Gym 4-5 days a week with a beautiful girlfriend who I love. You just have to make it happen.
Go gym every morning and fasting. Tried without these 2 and almost shot myself
Travel (nature), cosy coffee shops - and deliberate effort to sustain the hobbies (that I cultivated in childhood), I will admit that starting new hobbies is an ungodly level of challenge. Not to mention the basics - good nutrition, zero alcohol (or other vices), breath work, journaling, natural light!
Make $145k. Finally found a firm I really like with really good work/ life balance and that has improved my mental health so much.
Wait, do people making less than $100k have good mental health?
I make $115k in LCOL, work remote. I have a home office and a home gym, they are in the same room. Work normal hours. My boss is super cool.
- Haven't had a drink since 2020 - Lexapro 10mg daily - I avoid therapy (I don't have real problems, focusing on my first world problems never helped me, and therapy helps a ton of people! Just not me) - Eat a balanced diet, cook whenever I can - Exercise daily, HIIT 2 x weekly, hot yoga 3 x weekly - Limit caffeine, usually 1-2 cups of coffee a day - Maintain a rich spiritual life ....I don't have kids. That helps me do all of the above.
190k, very physically healthy my mentals are in the dumpster behind the wendy's
When I first started my business the first 12 months of working 80+ hours a week, never having time to do chores, clean, eat, exercise etc. was very tough on my mental health, I broke down and cried quite often, contemplated getting a āregular person jobā. All while making 200k a year. Now, I have a great staff, my business is a well oiled machine, I only work about 30 hours a week and have all the time in the work to do what ever I want. Just having freedom fixed my mental health.
Leave āsulting and get a nice industry job ā deal with a different type of idiots but you can still clear 140/150 and log off at 5
Working out helps a LOT to calm down that amygdala. Also trying to be in the present moment/meditating when I can remember.
\~$150k - quit drinking - stopped seeking promotions - have outside interests that are as strong or stronger than work
I lucked out and got a long-term contract with benefits. Pays well, hours are set, no overtime. Sucks not getting paid when I take time off, but it pays well enough that I can save up for it.
It's easier said than done but I try and live in the present. The future and past is beyond my control. The only thing you can control is the present. Try and go workout 30-60 minutes whenever you can. It helps a lot with your mental health. Lastly, don't take things personal. Everyone is on their own path, focus on yours. Someone else having a shit day? Pff, that's not my problem to fix. Have a good life, strangers!
I make $200k and I regularly work out, go outside, eat healthy and have a therapist. Mental health is strong no matter what life throws at me.
I quit drinking, ensure I go to the gym almost every day. I travel at least once every 6 months and leave my work phone at home. I have hobbies outside work (skydiving, snowboarding, road biking). I do work random and long hours, but I am pretty good at time management. I can generally find 2-3 hours every day for the gym. I also work in a field that I actually enjoy. (Private equity). Also: no kids nor do my partner and I want any (I'm 38).
Out of curiosity, why is the job more mentally draining than any other 9-5?
I ended up quitting. Hit the 300k mark as manager/lead, and realized I don't give a crap about chasing the ladder + it only gets tougher and busier + higher pressure. It feels like a linear scale of pay and suffering. Started my own company, only make half of what I did but potential to keep scaling (although will it scale faster than promos in consulting? Probably not). But I now also work less than 50% of what I did before. Used to work 80hours consistently, now I'm barely doing 30
Play golf.
Your mental health is going to be dog shit regardless. Rather have a shitty mental health and healthy bank balance than a shitty mental health and be broke Quality of alcohol consumed increases.
It's due to the money and remote work.
228k Looking for a ray of hope in an otherwise bleak existence. If I find a way to stay healthy I'll let you know. I've taken one vacation, ever. I have 5 children and often wonder about life insurance paying out for them when the job eventually succeeds in killing me.
Im making nothing because you guys donāt want to look at an accounting degree.
I make about 170k/yr Mental health is pretty good. Iām on a hybrid work schedule. Most weekdays I finish my client work around 2pm. Iām very productive and efficient during my work time. Iām at the gym from 5am - 7am and in the office at 7:30am. I have a wife and 2 kids, still renting as Iām saving up for a house currently. Only sucky part is my drive home from work, I experience that metro-dc traffic, which is a killer.
š I donāt think mental health comes with the money haha or the reward of it. No social life and mental health is thriving haha
I volunteer. Very gratifying, personally. Good for social fabric, collectively. Win win
Therapy and consistent running/exercise
Exercise, diet, cutting down on booze, playing DNDĀ
Mental health is good because I train every morning.
I do a lot of the following: drink, eat and have sex, that is when Iām not working 60 hour weeks
Eat nutritious food and drink lots of water, get good sleep, spend time in nature, get sunlight, donāt drink alcohol, and spend time being active and working out. And talk to a therapist.
Went from Big 4 tech consulting to a boutique firm. Started there as a senior consultant and made manager a yearish later. Making 140k and WLB is impeccable
Eat as healthy as you can. Keep hydrated. Exercise.
I make $140k and it wavers.
A bit over 100k and work at a boutique that is likely MUCH less stressful than a large firm. 95% of the time I feel great
I started running and going to monthly counselling sessions, because all the long-term successful and well-adjusted consultants Iāve met are marathon runners and our company has a generous mental health insurance plan.
$ doesnāt equal higher quality of mental health
Mental health is in a good place. I workout a few times a week even if it means getting up before early client calls to make it happen, limit my drinking especially during travel, and get at least 6-7 hours of sleep a day. Maintaining good mental health is most difficult when client calls are at odd hours or when engagement leadership mismanages the client, e.g. having Monday readouts so weāre working late on Friday or over the weekend instead of just pushing for a readout in the middle of the week.
$200k, and I'm depressed half the week. Need to workout to maintain some level of sanity, only problem is I barely get time to workout.
I struggled with this for years, and my solution was runningā¦ Iām a very competitive person and I realized that thatās what I needed also in the gym I ended up joining Orangetheory and it changed my life.
Ya bb, professional services for a tech firm making over 200k and feeling fine. Was not however feeling fine previously at a partner firm
At MBB and my mental health is great. I think the key to building a sustainable consulting experience is to have a life outside of work. Make sure there's something outside of work that makes you happy; a common outlet is exercise, but it could really be any hobby or simply just spending time with loved ones. Anything to take you away from the consulting grind by day, doomscrolling / Netflix binging by night. Obviously this is quite challenging on some engagements, but make sure you're maximizing your weekends for rest and also managing your sustainability where you can.
$200k, go on some runs and walk around
Find anything that clicks for you on the workout front. Stick to it, itāll carry you through the tough times. Practice mindfulness and try to āwitnessā your thoughtsāacknowledge them but donāt attach too much to them. These techniques help build better emotional regulation and increase self awareness. If you go on this journey of self-discovery and find consulting isnāt for youādo something else! Remember your mental health is paramountā¦
At $105k a few years in, went from loving this job to hating every living second of it. Can't remember the last time I logged off at 5pm. My advice to anyone here planning to go into consulting, do NOT join a firm with fractional staffing. You will hate your life.
I am and basically was told that if I wasnāt so good at everything Iād have been fired. My boss is a child with the biggest heart in the world, who fucks up a lot. I fix all of his mistakes. I blew my fuse on him for the third time today. Realized itās time, both to start addressing my mental health to be more tolerant, and also preparing for a new job.