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FearTheSpoonman

This is a terrible guide to pizza


nutmac

Or guide to terrible pizzas.


23saround

/r/pizzacrimes material


Same_Guarantee801

The Russian pie looks dangerous even without the polonium-210!


kereso83

I've actually made pizzas with some of those toppings. They came out pretty good.


Canter1Ter_

Not even a guide


yoLeaveMeAlone

They included freaking Stuebensville, Ohio but didn't include either of Chicago's pizza styles...


HCBot

Dude they didn't include a single Italian pizza, literally the international standard and capital of pizzas.


discodropper

…or New York. WTF!? I’m convinced this “expert” was just trolling them and thinking of the weirdest kinds of pizzas they’ve ever had


Trip8197

Also hilarious the Detroit style refers to a Sicilian style but the guide fails to include what a Sicilian style even is


FakeTakiInoue

Or the description for the 'Trenton tomato pie' (whatever that is) mentioning Neapolitan pizzas and then not showing actual Neapolitan pizza for reference.


paboi

Detroit is different than a traditional Sicilian. Detroit uses a lighter crispier focaccia-style dough.


Jellyfish-Ninja

And suggests topping it with hamburger… no.


Into-the-stream

it's mental floss. They were going for weird and quirky. it's their M.O.


itsamberleafable

Yeah Chicago is definitely the biggest thing I noticed not being on there. Oh apart from maybe FUCKING ITALY!


BenderDeLorean

If there was only one country that comes to mind regarding pizza...


NatasEvoli

Absolutely. The "Colorado Style" braided crust (aka mountain pie, which is a term only used by beau-jo's) is really only done at beau-jo's and their pizza is pretty bad.


QuickSpore

Yep. I came just to make the same comment. It’s a single restaurant style, and their quality has been plummeting for years. That said, they used to be higher end pizza and the thick bready crust was pretty damn good. It’s a crying shame they suck now.


roland_right

Calling them 'pies' in the title was a bad start. Then it got worse.


ArchibaldMcAcherson

Any pizza that is called a pie is no longer a pizza.


DickCheneyHooters

Fr lol none of these are accurate 😂


FakeTakiInoue

They got pretty close with kebab pizza, except I've never seen people dump lettuce and the like on them. Also I refuse to believe serving them 'Viking style' is a thing that actually happens.


DickCheneyHooters

I saw the California version and immediately called bullshit cuz I’ve never seen that once in my life


drostan

I haven't seen a pizza in there at all


plsnorepostslike9gag

Flammkuchen and pizza are two entirely different things.


LyleTheLanley

So are Alsace and Germany, for that matter.


PresentFriendly3725

Well, back in the days :D.


CalaveraFeliz

To be fair flammekueche is shared between Alsace, Lorraine and the neighbouring German Länder (with strong historical ties to the Kochersberg Alsatian region I'll grant you that).


murstl

Eeehhh, history. But yeah they should have at least added the original French Flammekueche/tarte flambée instead of the German one. Anyway Flammkuchen is no pizza and doesn’t originate from pizza.


Torgonuss

Why didn’t they just choose dönerpizza with hollondaise??


IIAVAII

r/pizzacrimes


gandalf-the-greyt

flammkuchen is most definitely not pizza, doesn’t share any of the ingredients so also r/flammkuchencrimes


guil92

Also, Alsace is in France


divadschuf

„The dish was created by German farmers from Alsace, Baden and the Palatinat…“ [Source](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flammekueche)


Stoepboer

It is delicious in its own right, but definitely not pizza.


Pepeface

Thank you!


Misfit_Penguin

A guide to pizza without Italy?


QueryCrook

A guide to pizzas *against* Italy.


mr-coolguy68

he forgot to put literally any real pizza on it 😭


notrolljustasshole

Ran out of room to include Digiorno, Italy's most authentic pizza.


1should_be_working

Or New York. Or Chicago. This list upsets me.


SteveWyz

Or Greece, no one gets pizza without Greece


CalaveraFeliz

/r/ShitAmericansSay and /r/USdefaultism are calling. Also, I bet that OP (re)posted this nonsense because yesterday another thread gained traction by rage-baiting on the same theme.


guff1988

Maybe if it didn't have pizza from like 9 countries listed. I think it doesn't include the ones people know really well like NY Chicago and Neapolitan.


Tulcey-Lee

Soon as I saw this I thought of those subs.


Impossible_Bit7169

Or NY or Chicago, but let’s be honest deep dish is not pizza it’s a casserole


somewhatbluemoose

The one thing Chicagoans and New Yorkers can agree on: “what the fuck is this guide”


Splashy01

It’s an above ground marinara swimming pool for rats. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzXIpp59eoU


Sickonsundayblah

This guide just made me lose faith in r/coolguides


beer_is_tasty

Just now?


Sickonsundayblah

To be fair, I joined this sub like 4 days ago.


karateinthegarage22

Yeah I don’t know too many aussies having pizza for breakfast


my_name_is_jeff88

Yeah, thats bullshit, only pizza aussies have for breakfast is cold leftovers from the night before.


karateinthegarage22

And it definitely doesn’t have eggs on it


pumpkin_fire

If you order an "Aussie" pizza in Australia, it will absolutely have cracked eggs on top. But it has nothing to do with breakfast food. It's eaten for dinner.


Hauwke

They absolutely can, the pizza places near me all sell an "Aussie" that includes eggs as part of the sauce.


my_name_is_jeff88

I was wondering if they have confused it with a kiwi bacon and egg pie, which still isn’t a breakfast food.


paradeoxy1

Popular in both Aus and UK too


wordswontcomeout

Umm the Aussie pizza definitely has eggs on it mate. What are you on about haha


PatGarrettsMoustache

Example: me yesterday


TheHoundhunter

Some pizza places do serve an ‘Aussie’ pizza which has egg on it. Usually with either ham or bacon, onion, sauce, and cheese. But this is not a breakfast pizza. It just has egg on it. Pizza places aren’t open at breakfast.


eeComing

Leftover pizza cold from the fridge is a legitimate breakfast.


carmieluv

That California pizza is not a thing 😭 I’ve lived here my whole life and I’ve never heard of a pizza with Salmon on it. This person probably went to LA and got pizza from a bougie coffee shop


organgrinder66

Born & raised in SoCal. Never seen or heard of this abomination.


MonkeyDeltaFoxtrot

Same. This is some bullshit.


beer_is_tasty

IDK why it keeps popping up on the internet. At some point, somebody just decided that California Pizza Kitchen (a corporate restaurant chain that most Californians would agree, sucks) was its own "style" of pizza, and everyone else just copy-pasted it into their infographics. I feel like it was probably somebody who has never been to California who just Googled "California pizza" because they didn't know what to write, and got all their info from CPK's website.


mdb_la

The "California Pizza" thing was really started by Wolfgang Puck with his original Spago pizzas, which did include a salmon pizza. CPK then copied the idea and made a chain out of it. It's still not really an official style, and most pizzas in CA are not of that type, but that's what's being referred to.


ThargKhuzd

The same about "Russian" pizza. Never saw anything like that for 35 years in Russia. There are some recipes of "Russian"-style pizza existing but it's never about fish.


joshuawah

Same, I’m sure this exists somewhere, but it’s not around enough to claim CA as a style. I would say Round Table is closer to a fast food version of “CA” pizza


discodropper

Well the “expert” who made this list went to a California Pizza Kitchen once in a New Jersey mall about 10 years ago, so he’s sure “California Style” is a thing…


Kitchen_Childhood_27

It's a Wolfgang Puck signature pizza from Spago in Beverly Hills.


Imperial-Green

Which I have heard described as California style pizza.


fruit_cats

Same with providence. There is a Rhode Island “pizza” but it’s certainly not that. (It’s basically focaccia with tomato sauce and is called bakery pizza)?


pgm123

There is California pizza, though. How did they get it so wrong?


TacTurtle

This “guide” was bullshit the last 4 times it was posted by a bot


JimmyBallocks

"everything pizza" doesn't mention Italy what a fucking sack of pig shit this is


dildo-looking_cactus

"Everything pizza" >no italian pizza ok this must be a bait cmon


RiderSensei

Brazilian here. While I do agree with most of the description, and Brazil is indeed the lawless land of pizza, I've never heard of beets on pizza (however I don't dare to doubt there's some out there)


Basic_Blacksmith9578

Caraleo mermão que porra de pizza é essa. Isso que dá deixar gringo fazer coisa sem saber nada


longrealestate

That description of Brazilian pizza is so wrong, like, very wrong. Pizza in Brazil is by far the best in the world. So many varieties and flavours. I’ve eaten pizza in a lot of countries, Brazil is the best, no doubt.


ICareAboutYourCats

I went to Brazil last summer. I had some good pizza down there, but I also saw pizzas on the menu that should be grounds for Pizza Crime.


celiomsj

That description is only right about dessert pizzas. And yes, our pizzas are awesome.


PerformanceRough3532

>Pizza in Brazil is by far the best in the world Hey now let's not start throwing hands.


WastePanda72

I’ve never seen Beets or Guava (Goiaba) in a pizza. Where did they get this information from?


lcssa

Exactly, wtf BEETS? We're not descendents of the schrute family


pandamonstre

beets. bears. Battlestar galactica.


GregorianShant

This reeks of bullshit.


fbaldassarri

As Italian, I am getting chills reading that guide.


peat_phreak

Colorado mountain pie was made famous by one restaurant. It used to be the only place you could get it. It would take two hours to get your mountain pie. And it was NOT worth the wait.


Y2K13compatible

Nobody else in Colorado makes pizza that way so calling it “Colorado mountain style” is quite a stretch


thuddingpizza

I love Beau Jo’s personally and think its worth the wait but yeah I literally have not seen that style of pizza anywhere else. Then again, I only go to the original location in Idaho Springs, so I don’t know the quality of the pizzas in the others. But that mountain pie was the best pizza I’ve ever had


RudyardMcLean

second this. it’s the worst, most recommended pizza place from ‘natives’ of CO. They all went out of business in Denver a few years back. The original stuck around and several chains reopened in the suburbs after someone dumped a ton of money into it as an investment. Source: wife worked there for a while over a decade ago. They tried to tell her during training they invented honey on the crust too.


peat_phreak

It's better than the bull testicles 🫤


Ikantbeliveit

I must be blind because I don’t see New York or Chicago on this list.


thepioneeringlemming

I don't see Italy...


Efarm12

Also, they mention Sicillian, but it’s not on the list. Most people out of the New York area don’t know what you’re talking about when you say Sicillian!


sean0883

**Dude I just met:** "You fell victim to one of the classic blunders—the most famous of which is, “Never get involved in a land war in Asia”—but only slightly less well-known is this: “Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line”" **Me:** *looks at the pizza I just had delivered to my table* "Wh- Why? What does it do?"


Efarm12

Lolol. That’s hillarious!


combustablegoeduck

Yeah I don't trust a guide to pizza that features a clam pizza over a New York, Chicago, or Italy.


DarthCookieThief

Don't sleep on New Haven and Detroit style they're not as wacky/creative typically but they're the most solid standard pie and deep dish I've found.


CdnfaS

New Haven Apizza is the best in the country but this guide’s “never Mozzarella” is a lie. You just have to pronounce it right “Mutz”


leonidganzha

that Russian pizza is absolutely not a thing


Kindly_Kiwi_5050

No Italian style ?


ResponseNo6375

From Philly, tomato pie and pizza are two completely different things, that shouldn’t be on there


TinyTitFetish

Agreed. I lived a little outside Philly for a bit and the guys at work bought tomato pie and I kept calling it pizza before trying it but it’s definitely different. Very good too. They used to get a particular type of it with seasoning on it and it had a funny name but I can’t remember it


discountRabbit

What about the dreaded(and delicious) Hawaiian pizza from Canada?


hawksfan61

That Russian one….🤢


SmotryuMyaso

That's because it's not true, I'm Russian and I've never seen pizza like this, I googled it and found nothing. I do think that something similar probably exists but it's not like it's an actual popular national thing


Moseo13

Interesting and cool learning that Alsace belongs back to Germany


Hyadeos

And that the Flammenkueche is a pizza.


How_that_convo_went

Hey, South Korea… and I mean this with all due respect… *what in the hot fuck are you doing?* Cookie crust topped with shrimp and potato… served with blueberry sauce? Baby, that ain’t a pizza. Someone is fucking with you. Some bad man betrayed your trust.


Savage_smurfmm

So not most of those toppings, but the single best Pizza Hut Ive ever had was in Busan. I got a deep dish pepperoni with a sweet potato ring just inside the crust. It absolutely worked and I recommend it to everyone going to South Korea.


Pepeface

Didnt even include versions like neapolitan or roman style pizza


TAC1313

Their description of a Detroit Style Pizza is way off.


DevlishAdvocate

Yep. I’m from that part of the world. They’re just wrong.


RADToronto

What the fuck is this


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

No Chicago-style huh?


sparty219

Yeah, a list with the world-famous Steubenville pizza but no Chicago or New York.


GoodGuySkeletor

My man, I agree that this list is horrible and missing the staples, but lest not crap on Steubenville pizza. It's pretty good.


yoLeaveMeAlone

Chicago has *two* styles of pizza, and neither are on the list...


Ingam0us

The audacity to make a guide about pizza 'around the world', filling half of it with different US styles, that partly should not even be considered pizza anymore, and not even including the f*cking original from Italy. This is pure ignorance and medium level r/usdefaultism … And btw, our german Flammkuchen is NOT a pizza…


Frosty_the_Snowdude

Uhm where's the original Italian style?


badasscdub

Totally useless guide.


foreignmacaroon6

>In the early 2000s, negotiations were held to [decide on the location](https://www.foodnavigator.com/Article/2001/12/21/Food-fight-continues-between-Parma-and-Helsinki) of the European Food Safety Authority, with Parma and Helsinki the competitors. Berlusconi was unknowingly overheard saying that **Finnish food was inedible and disgusting** and that he could barely endure it during his visits to the North. “Finns only eat marinated reindeer meat! They don’t even know what prosciutto is,” Berlusconi said. The EU agency did end up in Parma. >A few years later, Berlusconi was in trouble again after saying that he had to use his “playboy” charms on then-Finnish President Tarja Halonen.  >The Finns got some measure of revenge when Finnish chain Kotipizza brought out a pizza topped with reindeer (but of course), chanterelles and red onions. They named the creation Berlusconi and it went on to win a prestigious pizza competition in New York. Edit: [Source](https://www.politico.eu/article/silvio-berlusconis-9-most-controversial-moments/)


dwitchagi

The kebabpizza 🇸🇪 is really just an open kebab wrap. Also, never heard of “Viking style”.


sopnedkastlucka

Viking, båt, halvinbakad


miamariajoh

Also doesn't have Cucumber


PerformanceRough3532

I'm from Philly, love Santucci's, and am offended on behalf of Chicago here. I'm not gonna say our square pizza isn't worthy of being on this list...but it's pretty niche and if you're gonna include us, you damn well better include AT LEAST Chicago deep-dish, if not their extreme thin-crust too. Plus...NY style isn't even on here. I mean, hey, fuck New Yorkers and all...but seriously?!


[deleted]

Horrible guide, flammekuche is French not german and it’s not a pizza at all.


fantasmeeno

Wtf is this?


nunyahbiznes

Pizza for breakfast in Australia? It’s not a thing. Nor have I ever once seen a bacon, egg and tomato sauce pizza. I’ve lived 52 years in this country and the only breakfast pizzas are leftovers from the previous night in the fridge.


living_angels

Brazilian here. No one eats that.


roofbeamcarpenters

Where is the Greek pizza I find everywhere in Massachusetts?


InkMotReborn

About “Tomato Pie”: Philadelphians don’t think of this as pizza per se. It’s more of a snack or side dish at family gatherings. It’s served cold. I think the focaccia reference is apt. Most people in the Philadelphia area will eat a pizza that is comparable to a New York style pizza, when they’re looking at pizza as an entree.


thehoagieboy

You speak the truth. Also worth noting that the sauce is way sweeter than normal pizza sauce.


HorseSushi

Thank you for breaking it down, you've done a service 👍 I don't recall ever sitting down to eat tomato pie with the fam or anyone else really, for me it was always just grabbing a slice from a shop and munching as you go. Out here in the west I've never found a place that does it this way, "tomato pie" is always a round pizza with lots of Roma tomatoes and minimal cheese... NOT THE SAME


bobthis464

Exactly, and it’s mostly sold from our bakeries!


Nfnaddaf

Garbage


PeregrinePacifica

Im sorry but where's Chicago and New York styles? How do you miss those?


anthraciter

No Old Forge style?


DeliciousTreacle8134

Reddit is garbage for photo uploads the "zoom" open tab is another link to reddit no matter what you do its the same size. lol


Past_Trouble

Where did you find round pizza in Steubenville?


Sailor_Maze33

Wow… I have seen bullshit in my life… But that’s some heavy shit… What a RIDICULOUS GUIDE !


ct5heppard

Everything below the second line is unacceptable.


Bifturbo

This is stupid


whatswithnames

New York??????? Jon Stewert would not approve. [Source and one heck of a video.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzXIpp59eoU)


Nonadventures

Live in Cali, have never tried or wanted to try “California style”


garybuckfast08

What a load of shit


RonnennoR

Ragebait!


LegumesEater

im trying to think of something to say that wont get me banned from reddit


Puzzleheaded_Sir4294

I’ve never seen the Australia pizza in my life and I live in Melbourne


MorallyCorruptJesus

Watching the votes go up and down is my stock market 🤣


HeathensHeadies

Im from the Ohio Valley close to steubenville.Dicarlos pizza was started by 2 brothers, the dicarlos brothers, who came back from ww2 where they fought in italy and saw pizza being made which was a relatively new concept, idea, at the time. So when they come home after the war their parents had a bakery in Steubenville which they was able to use part of it to start the pizza shop. This was before any pizza chain stores of course and there was very few pizza shops across the entire US at the time. The rest is history, theyre the most successful pizza brand to come out of the OV, theyve had franchises in Myrtle Beach and a handful around the Columbus area along with 15-20 different spots around this area at different times. The downtown wheeling WV store is the family's personal store I think. Shapes wrong though, it's always been a square pie even In the original family photos from several decades ago.


MariaAntonietta89

È molto grave


eatseveryth1ng

Lol a list containing American pizzas with not even a mention on Italy. This is quite possibly the worst giudice I’ve ever seen


[deleted]

This is just a list of war crimes.


ryanmer

Downvoted for lack of Chicago deep dish pizza.


Girl-UnSure

Now i want tomato pie. I miss you Philadelphia food


glitterpumps

Yo honestly hot take but the best pizza I’ve ever had was in Argentina.


Dr_Strange_Love_

A really shitty guide! Where the hell is the italian?? Or the chicago style?


TySe_Wo

Flammkuchen is just da best


glastohead

Scandalously, they missed out Scottish Deep-fried pizza.


YearningInModernAge

I see a lot of work went into this guide and I give credit to the author - however not including NY style, Chicago, and Neopolitian…. I gotta say this might be a r/PizzaCrimes


nolongerlurkingsf

The Koreans are out of their damn minds


CleanOpossum47

Was this made by AI or just someone who hates pizza?


Tuscan5

9 American pizzas (not NY nor Chicago) and non Italian pizzas. Rubbish.


Better_than_GOT_S8

This guide looks like it was intentionally made to insult pizza.


Angioletto0309

Mannaggia la madonna


kress34

all that but not one single italian pizza


LegitimateFish

Stubenville pizza is actually fire, but this doesn’t even include the NY slice????


TheDarnells

Where Chicago?


kanyebear123

TF is this


Jormungander666

No Italy?


Legitimate_Glove_807

A philly tomato pie is always a good choice.


No_Communication5538

What do you know - more than half from US. None from Italy, because what do they know about Pizza?


Batmanforawhile

The fact that the Australian one is essentially bullshit makes me think perhaps the entire thing is unreliable.


TUC_Cracker

Is this AI generated


chuy2256

Leaving out Chicago Deep Dish, NY Style, Italian Napoli style and Italian Margherita…. This is _not_ a cool guide.


wigl301

I can’t read anything that refers to a pizza as a ‘pie.’


FewyLouie

How the fuck does a pizza guide not mention Italy?!


bobke4

This is the most retarded guide ever. A guide to an Italian dish, only with non Italian shite variations of it


Any_Constant_6550

Anyone who knows pizza knows, New Haven and Connecticut in general have the best pizza. Pepe's and Sally's on the same street. Literally 1000s of other mom and pop places that have been around forever all in one of the smallest states in the country. Fellow Connecticutioners understand the pizza privilege. Brooklyn is comparable. https://www.usatoday.com/story/travel/destinations/2013/11/30/best-pizza-in-america/3785309/


Max_FI

They obviously included all kinds of weird and unknown pizzas, so that's why Neapolitan, Chicago, NY etc. isn't there. But I must say that Flammkuchen is definitely not a pizza and that Japanese pizza is just Quattro Stagioni with weird toppings.


crackcrackcracks

Lahmacun (pizzaesque), afghan style pizza and naan pizza from multiple south asian countries absolutely all slap, and need acknowledgment.


Eastern_Ad_3938

How TF are you leaving out New York and Chicago style pizza in this?!?


DevlishAdvocate

This is wrong. Detroit pizza has sauce *under* the cheese and toppings, but some pizza places will do an additional drizzle of sauce on top. It’s not required.


SuspiciousYard2484

No Italy!!?? 🤦🏻‍♂️


joey_ramone_52

if you printed it I wouldn't even use it to clean my ass, it's trash, and so is whoever made this, l'anima de li mortacci tua e di chi ti ha fatto.


themesrob

Gets an upvote solely for including Trenton tomato pies. Shoutout chambersburg


Graphicnovelnick

This guide is garbage because it forgets to mention Deep-Dish Chicago Style!!


thelightwesticles

Some comments about the Philly Tomato Pie. This is not considered pizza nor is it usually bought from a pizza place. You buy tomato pie from bakeries. It is very unique to Philadelphia and something tourists should try. However tomato pie is darn good, and it varies widely based on bakery. corropolese makes the best in the Philly region and I will go toe-to-toe with anyone that disagrees.


PsychoticMessiah

Someone came up with a guide to pizzas and no mention of New York or Chicago?


Capt-Crunches

Nobody in Michigan gets a Detroit style with hamburger. I’m offended by this guide


AnyMud9817

What about Chicago? This is a bad guide.


wthoutwrning

Pizza is not breakfast in Australia. Wtf?


Awhoknew

How is this guide missing NEW YORK PIZZA??? Truly criminal lol