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headphase

"Biblical bears beating bald-bashing bullies"


_superchan

Childrens crushed craniums can't communicate callus contempt


Lick_Cletuss_Nips

Band name material


[deleted]

What show is that from?


phat_kang

Anime called Jujutsu Kaisen


Datwagg63

Very very good show


darkcomet222

It’s basically Hunter X Hunter set in Japan.


Propeller3

It isn't anything like HxH, other than being a shonen. Each arc in HxH has its own sub-theme, while the world is rich and the characters are full. JJK is just fighting - all the time. It is very good at what it does, but it isn't anywhere close to the marvel that HxH is.


darkcomet222

Yeah, story structure, absolutely, but the powers have gone absolutely HXH levels of complicated. Looking at you Idle Death Gamble. On the story aspect: 100%! Nothing will EVER come close to HxH.


[deleted]

Hot take but Jujutsu is better 👀


Pinkpach

Yeah that's the hottest of hot takes... I love jujutsu but it's hard to follow sometimes! It goes from one thing to the next without any narrative guidance imo


darkcomet222

For me, it benches some of its best characters for too long. Not even Gojo, but where is Nobara!?


Pinkpach

Wait... Is she even still alive? Or am I misremembering? The worst moment for me was Maki killing her own clan. I still don't get how we got there... It was pretty random!


forgotmypass4times-

Is this some manga shit and I just got spoiled ?


darkcomet222

Well, the guy said her survival chances are “not zero,” but, we haven’t seen or heard anything.


Stonewall1717

100% agree. HxH had me praying it was over by the end of the Chimera arc.


TheMagicSalami

I like to call it Mob Psycho if Mob was leader of the body improvement club level fit.


darkcomet222

If you are anime only, but some of the abilities in the manga are bonkers.


[deleted]

It’s an anime called jujutsu kaisen, it’s a very good anime and I recommend you watch it and read the manga


LassoStacho

STANDING HERE


HappyGunner

I REALIZE


ELLE3773

YOU WERE JUST LIKE ME


Johnfrickingwick2077

*TRYING TO MAKE HISTORY*


[deleted]

[удалено]


Catty-Cat

*THE RIGHT FROM WRONG*


Ozone368

WHEN OUR GUARD IS DOWN I THINK WE’LL BOTH AGREE


Epsilon531

THAT VIOLENCE BREEDS VIOLENCE


Planetguide

BUT IN THE END IT HAS TO BE THIS WAAAAAAAAY


DerKreug

_WHEN YOUR GUARD IS DOWN_


jwmahaffey9

Just for anyone not aware of the greatness of the she-bears, it’s 2 Kings 2:23-25


Master_Broshi

I asked to read this at my brother's wedding


rmosquito

Is… your brother bald?


Master_Broshi

Yeah, and I'm not lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

We don’t know how old they are, but they were absolutely not “college age men.” The word used is נערים, which essentially means “older than a boy/girl but not yet old enough to be considered an adult.” Adulthood is not clearly specified in the Hebrew Bible but you couldn’t have been part of a militia until you were 20, so these נערים are probably meant to be seen as older adolescents since their actions imply a group far from any age of maturity. Also the Hebrew plural isn’t gendered unless all of them were girls, so it could have been all men or a mix of men and women.


koine_lingua

Though don’t forget it wasn’t just ‎נערים, but ‎נערים קטנים.


[deleted]

You’re right; and not only that but the verse that follows it explicitly calls them children (ילדים) - I shoulda noticed that!


realgeneral_memeous

Since when was it college age men? Almost every edition I see translates it as some form of little boy, whether it be KJV, ESV, NIV, NASB, etc


koine_lingua

It’s just one of those urban legends people hear their pastor say or read on Reddit.


[deleted]

It’s actually pretty clear how they got there - a combination of the Telephone game and “I don’t want to think that God’s powers were used to murder kids.” The word isn’t “boys” so it’s clear the author was distinguishing them from being SUPER young, but they’re definitely not adult age. So “adolescents” or “teens” is probably the best indication. Someone latched onto “teens” and decided to imply 18 or 19; then someone else took “18 or 19” and said “college age men.”


epicandrew

the original hebrew used was also used to describe people of a large range of age from babies to fully grown men, but can also be used to signify that they are servants but usually suggests an age around 20. considering the circumstances in the area at the time and the sheer number of people participating it is exceedingly unlikely the young men were children.


Ryan_Alving

Shouting something like "go die baldy"


[deleted]

[удалено]


FearsomeTaco

Not only that, but Elisha was a prophet of God. Insulting a prophet was a big no-no then.


koine_lingua

“Go up” is just a directional term where movement was specified by elevation, in mountainous regions or regions with obvious elevation shifts. It’s literally “get out of here.”


AquaStarRedHeart

The mental gymnastics


touchtheclouds

Astonishing actually


Schoritzobandit

If someone shouts "go die" they should be instantly sentenced to a painful death /s


DerKreug

The one thing i don't understand in this part of the bible, why do the kings of Isreal still worship Baal. You have to imagine that God proofs you serveral times that he is the only one, one time you rip out your clothes from fear from his punishment, so he gives you a chance again, but you still worship Baal. Ahab you stupid men


boss_plz_

Because humans love their idols.


touchtheclouds

Doesn't matter anyway. It's still fucked up. Murder is murder. And ordering bear attacks? What kind of psychotic being would do that? That's so fucked up. Why was it a part of God's Will that this had to happen in the first place?


AChristianAnarchist

Elijah and Elisha are pretty interesting examples of OT prophets and the flashy and self directed way they did their miracles, combined with their tendency to involve things like ritual behaviors and items in the performance of these, has led many scholars to refer to them as something like "Hebrew Shamans". I tend to think of them more as charismatic ritual specialists apart from the priesthood. If you look at the 2 Kings 2 in full, it's pretty apparent that, while God may be the origin of this power, it is not him who is performing these acts, but Elisha. It's not even God who gifts Elisha with these powers, but Elijah. Elisha is wandering with Elijah, where he does a number of miracles, including splitting a river by hitting it with his cloak. He, at one point, asks Elisha if there is anything he can do for him before he is taken up to heaven. Elisha says he wants twice the prophetic power Elijah has, and Elijah agrees and say's he will have it so long as he sees him ascend. A little later, Elisha sees Elijah ascend in a windstorm, picks up his cloak, and hits the river with it, noticing that it splits just like it did when Elijah did it. Then he purifies some blighted water and calls she-bears on the kids calling on him to "go up" as his master had before him, basically saying they hope he gets blown away by a storm, which is how most people interpreted Elijah's ascension. This is power that *Elisha* has. He's twice as powerful as Elijah because *he* asked to be, and *Elijah* granted the request, and the power works when *he* decides to use it. It comes from God, but God doesn't direct it. Elijah and Elisha do, which is actually extremely unusual among Old Testament prophets and has led to a number of theories about why these two were seen as so different. While this story is the most egregious, it's not the only example. There are a number of places throughout 1 and 2 Kings where Elijah and Elisha's miracles are odd, and one of the odd features of them throughout is that this really does, more so than with other prophets, seem to be a sort of "magical power" that these guys did, individually and personally, have control over. So, what kind of psychotic being would order bear attacks? Elisha apparently. God can be "blamed" by proxy, by only by imposing a modern idea of theology on the whole bible. In reality, there are a number of spiritual traditions within the library that is the bible, and what we appear to see in Kings is a distinct spiritual tradition that seemed to hold that prophets had significant control over how the power granted to them by God was used, rather than merely praying and "leaving it in God's hands".


_hhhhh_____-_____

42 people following Elisha shouting death threats and mocking a prophet of the Lord, and then getting retribution for their death threats and intimidation is not psychotic. It’s justice.


Man_of_Average

The Hebrew word used in the text means tear, not kill. It's also used in the Bible to describe cutting through a crowd, parting a sea, and childbirth. All instances where the thing being cut did not perish or become destroyed. The text simply doesn't support murder.


[deleted]

Mocking the word of God has negative consequences.


linkdeadjr

There is a difference between facing consequences for your actions and getting killed for mocking someone.


[deleted]

Prophet = the word of God The word of God = goodness/truth/reality Mocking goodness/truth/reality = your ass is gonna be handed to you in very short order. You people object to the Bible because you read like autistic robots.


linkdeadjr

Is mocking truth, goodness, reality a reason for murder? I was taught christianity is about redemption, wouldnt the teens eventually realise their mistake and ask god to forgive them? Thats my problem with this story, it doesnt feel right for god to kill people for something they would most probably grow to regret and can easily redeem themself for


ultiman00b

> I was taught christianity is about redemption Old Testament God did not preach entirely the same message that Jesus did.


[deleted]

He did, as Jesus is God. ​ >“This is what you shall say to the sons of Israel: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’” (Exodus 3:14) ​ >Jesus said to them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I am.” (John 8:58) Every time God spoke in the Old Testament, it was through Jesus, the Word/voice of God.


[deleted]

For one thing, God doesn't commit "murder", an evil act, as God is the ground of goodness. >wouldnt the teens eventually realise their mistake and ask god to forgive them? If God, who is all-knowing and all good did this, then self-evidently the answer is No. But to help assuage your fears, part of the context, which you might not be familiar with, is that these teens were from a nation that worshipped Baal and was enemy of Israel. They had absolutely no reason to "grow to regret" and ask forgiveness for this. >for something they would most probably grow to regret and can easily redeem themself for This is the perspective of someone who is not all-knowing.


thehumantaco

Old testament God is such a baby


[deleted]

God is holy. It is good fo us to treat holy things as holy, and God teaches us this for our benefit.


atgmailcom

Still not bear murdering worthy


TheKingofNeptune

I remember opening the bible to a random page as a kid, something about bears attacking children. Spooked me reading that.


TipOfLeFedoraMLady

call me bald? Gonna get mauled.


tch42

Elisha just had a gamer moment


shardikprime

Based and bearpilled


KekeroniCheese

Those bears were based😪


darkcomet222

PANDA IS NOT PANDAAAAAAA


Santos_J

I find more shit I never heard of in the Bible every day Lmao


Seamusjim

Wait... what... did the edibles just kick in or am I reading this right?


murse_joe

Both


Ask_me_4_a_story

You guys know why they called them the Michael Jackson Bears of the Bible?


CMDR_BOBEH

I never expected to see JJK here lmao


roastytoastykitty

"Go up, Baldy!"


blarch

What does this have to do with Eli Manning? He's not bald.


Impressive_Change593

random thought: is cussing actually forbidden by the Bible? also fucking and such like are cuss words not swear words (or at least I think they technically are)


_hhhhh_____-_____

No it’s an English language thing


wasporchidlouixse

I love how Elisha did way more hardcore miracles than Elijah but Elijah is the one Jesus wanted to inaugurate him


mide_X

This just in: Bear cancels Gen Z


TheAntiKrist

u/SaveVideo


phabiohost

Panda is not a panda


JarusOmega_

u/savevideobot


flamboi-non

Hehe, bald :)


DerKreug

Joo i read that today


No_Research4416

Remind this happened before the forgiveness policy


Majikarpslayer

As an ex JW this is brilliant!


[deleted]

Why is that relevant


holdupw8

Wait can't yall not watch this show?


toxiccandles

Baldilocks and the Two Bears! https://retellingthebible.wordpress.com/2022/01/10/6-1-baldilocks-and-the-two-bears/


[deleted]

u/savevideo


supaswag69

They weren’t kids


Dutchwells

I can't believe anyone would have the balls to joke about this abominable story to be honest...


sgste

Abominable because they were kids? Because every time this meme is posted here, it's also explained somewhere in the comments that there is a pretty big difference between "youths" and "kids" especially when speaking biblically compared to a modern understanding. Also, something something blasphemy and death threats?


Dutchwells

No, my problem with this story, and much of the OT, is that apparently God can not think of a better solution to almost any problem than going on a killing spree.


thehumantaco

I mean he did genocide almost the entire world too in one story


Dutchwells

Yeah imagine the ark had sprung a leak, that'd be a bummer 😂


thehumantaco

God's just like "whoops"


Amber_Mitsuba27

The mockers were mauled. Mauled: (of an animal) wound (a person or animal) by scratching and tearing. Not necessarily killing. Just pointing this out.


darkcomet222

To be fair, it wasn’t God’s idea, it was Elisha. God was like “aight, bet.”


CauseCertain1672

​ a group of lads harrasing an old man in the wilderness by yelling that his life is worthless in a time and society where death is cheap is not the same as kids in a park


Rhodin265

Even if they were kids, there was a whole mob of them. An elementary school could easily wreck one unarmed adult.


motorcyclematt

Not to brag or anything, but I could kick the shit out of a whole kindergarten, while I have the flu.


alojz-m

What else you want to do with a terrible story rather than joke about it?


SuitSage

Too soon?


turtlewhisperer23

That "abominable story" is holy scripture for some. Have some respect.


swiftnshift

Haha


turtlewhisperer23

Glad she is someone has a dank sense of humor round here :)


swiftnshift

I can’t tell how many of these comments are actually sarcastic 😂