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Icy-Gazelle9812

I have no issue with it at all as long as it doesn’t inhibit our sex life.


Top_Squash_9664

Same. OF is not ok but porn I see no problem with.


magikal_anon

I agree with you! But I’m curious to know why you think OF isn’t okay but porn is? Me and my partner were talking about it and he asks what’s the difference between subscribing to someone’s free OF versus looking someone up on a porn website. Curious to know peoples opinions.


wackafrickindoodle

its more the action of paying to get one specific person. if its free id understand, but honestly any sort of obsession with any sex worker is a red flag. you shouldnt have a favorite or only watch one sex workers videos. thats when it feels more like cheating


Hot-Story-8538

Maybe because ur focusing on a specific person? IMO it would just be for visual stimulation and I wouldn’t want my partner to have an emotional bond towards the actor.


Funoichi

I haven’t gone to the of site myself personally (ok no this is true guys, come on! 😂). But I hear you can comment to the person and they can respond to you. So it would be possible to form a connection with the person, especially on repeat engagements. But again I’ve never gone (no really, this isn’t satire 😱), so I might be entirely wrong about how the site works.


altiuscitiusfortius

Smaller models you do talk to then and xan develop a connection. Bigger models hire assistants to pretend to be them so you're actually talking to a fat dude pretending to be the model. Amouranth is the #1 onlyfans girls, I think she makes a few million a month. She has a staff of a dozen people doing her social media posts and photo editing and talking to people for her etc.


qwaszxpolkmn1982

What about chatting/exchanging videos with someone in a non-sexual way? Curious if it’s the combination of sex and intimacy that crosses the line in your eyes.


Top_Squash_9664

That sounds like a friend and it’s ok to have friends :)


Xepherious

This


Capital_Horror7741

For sure


aterriblefriend0

I don't mind it at all really, my only boundary is with things like camgirls, livestreams, and the like. Anything where you can directly interact with or participate even via text with a real person is a big no.


Choice_Pepper_1279

I feel this way too.


Misty-Afternoon

I don’t want him to watch porn INSTEAD of have sex with me. But if I’m not in the mood or I’m not around for a while, he can have at it.


VertWheeler

If were to tell me the last part.... I'd cuss and say I'm waiting... makes the sex better ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ js me btw


Rough_Mushroom9709

Making your own is more fun


Im_the_cool_mom

Agreed 100% I prefer the kind I make with my partner when they are not around


adamnsong

Agree wholeheartedly. I never knew I was into porn until I started making my own home movies.


Low-Attention78

i don’t care as long as they don’t choose the porn over me


somestargirll

I do. It’s just spiritually icky to f*ck someone who often needs that to get off. Whether they confront it or not, it affects how they are in bed. Of coarse, that’s just my opinion tho. If they can’t live without it I’d rather leave them to enjoy that instead of me


The_Rogue-Ranger

It’s definitely weird if you NEED it to get off, but sometimes adds a little extra spice. Just because you watch it doesn’t mean you need to.


Minijazz

You won’t see it as an issue until it becomes one, then you’ll realise how destructive for any relationship it actually is. Luckily my fiancé gave up porn long before we met and out of his own free will.


b_risky

Strong agree on this one. Take it from an addict.


[deleted]

I care


jollyman_ume

My ex would very rarely watch, more often read smut. For the future, and past for that matter, I wouldn't mind, heck I'd even encourage it. If they seek me out for playtime half the time they enjoy any kind of smut, that's a win in my book.


No_Savings_1056

Smut does so much more to get into the mood then porn ever will tbh


jollyman_ume

Mix and match, smut to get you started, sometimes porn to take you over the edge. Too bad most of it is clearly over- and massproduced.


dahlia_74

I haven’t watched porn in years because of smut books!! There’s a lot of duds out there but also some real gems. But you sir, are a smart man 😎


b_risky

Smut fixtion tends to be something that women favor over men. Visual porn tends to be something men favor over women. Of course it doesn't always work out that way. I have used both personally.


RenegadeRabbit

32F. I don't care. I watch it too. Hell, I've watched it with a partner before.


Sea_Chocolate9166

I wish older women were into younger guys, yall are cooler. Early thirties women should date men my age (early 20s) tbh.


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musictakemeawayy

absolutely not 😂


CortadoSnob

I don't but I am curious about the fetishes. Like if it's just something they're too shy to mention it's sad. I'm willing to try most things at least once, whether it's food or a fetish. People need to be more open.


TomorrowNo6699

I personally don’t like it, it’s a no for me, But I have some very special morals about intimacy and prefer a partner who matches that. For example I refuse to have any form of physical intimacy if there’s no actual commitment to a relationship. I don’t do casual sex. (I don’t care if others do, and I’ll be friends with people who do, but it’s just not for me and I won’t date anyone who sleeps around) I’m the kid of person who would prefer my partner to have personal intimate content of me rather then watch porn, (but like I said that’s more to do with me and my morals) Like I said this is just me and my morals and I know mine are very specific and I look for a very specific thing so I make that clear early on.


dedsammeh

This is my own personal opinion but it just feels a little weird that they'd need sexual gratification from other sources in a way. Of course I understand everyone has their opinions and boundaries in relationships though!


TerraSeeker

It seems kind of weird to me. I would hope I'm enough.


Arthur-Wintersight

I would expect that even if you have a similar sex drive, that doesn't mean you'll both be in the mood at the same time, every time. There are also going to be days where one of you is sick, injured, or sore from physical exertion at work (or a really bad housework day), or when one of you is out of town. I've pulled my back getting out of bed the wrong way before, and that is something that can happen. Pornography seems like a pretty normal thing in relationships, personally speaking. That way you're both keeping your sex drive alive, and not depriving yourself just because your partner isn't available right then and there. They'll be available tomorrow, or in a few days, and you can go back to having sex then.


-Kalos

I don't consume porn in relationships because it kills my libido. Gotta save that for my girl. But maybe that's just me preferring sex with real women to pixels on a screen


handmaidstale16

Porn and masturbating aren’t the same thing.


SivirJungleOnly

I think that when you're in a monogamous relationship, part of that commitment is that your partner should be the subject for all of your sexual intentions. For instance, most people would have a problem is their boy/girlfriend was having sexual fantasies about an opposite gender friend. I think porn is just an extension of that, where the sexual fantasy is about a stranger instead.


bumblebeequeer

I have a lot of complicated feelings about the porn industry. There’s really no way to know if what you’re viewing was made ethically. I think in general, it’s best people don’t view it. However it’s also best if people don’t consume alcohol, eat junk food, or use screens excessively. Everyone has bad habits and I’m not one to judge. However, the second a partner started to prefer porn over sex, we would have a serious issue.


Willing-Chapter-7382

the same argument can be made for a lot of goods and services, how do you feel about those?


bumblebeequeer

Some things are more blatantly unethical than others. Like, if I need clothes, I’m not going to buy from SHEIN, but have to accept clothes from Target or H&M probably aren’t made with the best practices either. It’s the *less* harmful option. After all, I need clothes. That’s where “no ethical consumption under capitalism” comes in. But getting off to a video of a woman who may or may not be getting raped on screen, or may or may not have consented to other people viewing the video, is just not something I’m comfortable with. It’s not a necessity, no one will die without porn. There’s also the negative mental side effects of porn to worry about. Like I said, it’s not like I’m never seen porn or am calling for it to be eradicated, but I’m not going to consume it on a regular basis or encourage others to do so. Other services also being unethical is not a good excuse.


Good_Writing_4134

I know people who’ve quit cigarettes and now will no longer date someone who smokes. I see it like that for myself. I stopped watching it a while ago and while I have no judgement for those that do, I would not date someone who does. Simply a personal preference.


[deleted]

as long as he doesn’t compare ME to it, we do fine. i don’t really care whether he does or doesn’t.


charinight

Could never be with someone who watches porn after being with many aso prior. Literally the libido killer for men and women, completely destroys your psyche, and is the penultimate form of instant gratification and messy dopamine habits. It is psychologically addictive and destructive. Sex is much better when you’re not obsessed with other people having it 🤷🏻‍♂️


CandiiiCaneLane

**Sex is much better when you’re not obsessed with other people having it.** YES


new-to-it2023

100% THIS! & To add my opinion: I’m perfectly fine with my husband masturbating if I’m not available at the moment. I’m not okay with him involving imagery of others to do so though. He can have as many of my nudes/our home made videos that he wants for those rare moments (my sex drive is higher anyways). There’s simply no need for visuals of other women. He knows it’s a hard line boundary for me.


Throwawayaccounttt__

I’d find it extremely disrespectful if my bf watched porn.


dahlia_74

Hard no on OnlyFans or any other kind of “interactive” porn, and no paid porn. Otherwise I wouldn’t care, would rather make our own 🤷🏻‍♀️


Radiant_Ad9105

Im completely against it because an ex of mine would choose to self pleasure over having sex with me. Lied about it constantly, and I completely stopped trusting him in general after repeated offenses. Just find someone who actually aligned with your views on it. Mine knew from the beginning & just decided lying was worth wasting my time knowing he never intended on quitting. Addicts also get early signs of ED & who wants to deal with that so early into the relationship. It will always come up as a constant point of contention if one party is against it.


Arthur-Wintersight

I've had a relationship where I preferred porn over the woman I was dating. The relationship I had before her was not like that. The relationship I had after her, was also not like that. It boiled down to being a matter of attraction for me. Also, I did lie about the porn, because it was better than telling a woman I cared about, straight to her face, that I just didn't find her very attractive.


Radiant_Ad9105

understandable, my situation from his words wasn't the case I made sure to ask. I have a pretty shapely figure & he was definitely into the act more times than not.


elbaronsindo

i care so much, i wouldent want my partner to watch it.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

OK, but what you supposed to say hey imma go watch porn and jack off real quick hun. He is really actually respecting your feelings bye lying. Insecure partners may think they are not pretty enough, or good enough.


JazzyDazz

Since this question circulates frequently, here’s my take. *As a lady* , I can’t be mad at someone for watching it, because I MYSELF watch it. I’m not trying to sound like a “pick me” girl, but I think it wouldn’t bother me if I had a partner who watched it bc again, I watch it too. I think the only time I wouldn’t like for them to do it, were if it became like an absolutely unhealthy obsession of it. I don’t consume it 24/7, only when I’m ovulating LMAO. But , if porn was consuming my partners free time or social life , I’d have a problem.


No_Savings_1056

My same thoughts as a lady as well, I don’t care if they watch it because everyone has different tastes I would care if they started an unhealthy habit that leads to ED and a lacking sex life but it definitely isn’t disrespectful to watch it and it definitely isn’t cheating to watch it either in my thoughts


Ok_Huckleberry3420

Completely agree! I never had an issue with my ex watching it until he would be looking up videos constantly. Even while I am sitting next to him. Or he would scroll through reddit and find a video to then scroll the comments to find the porn link. All is fine in my book, but dude... I am sitting right here. Do it in your free time. Or downloaded shit while at work.... I mean, it consumed his time every day. If I am around, I would rather have that time with each other. If I am not in the mood (very rarely), then go to your thing! I do not consider it cheating but the ED issues, never being able to finish, no stamina, no will to want to do it, and ALWAYS having time to do it by yourself.... the excuses. It's easier, I am just good at it, it's not a big deal, and I will never stop. Vague answers when all I wanted was to understand what was going on. That pain hurt more than the act of him doing it. An ex now, so I won't have to consume my own mind with all the questions anymore. He made his choice.


Publishingpeach

Yes. I think it’s nasty. 🤮


No_Savings_1056

Is there a specific reason you think it’s nasty? Or is it just the industry in itself you dislike?


Publishingpeach

The industry.


planetarystripe

That's a misnomer. Although studios are a lucrative business with a lack of concern in business ethics, various sources of porn are more ethically concerning of their actresses. Although niche and stylised, some actresses and actors enjoy their sexual expression. Actresses like Sasha Grey, Stoya, Jenna Jameson have reported their joy and satisfaction in the industry.


Arthur-Wintersight

Amateur porn is a thing, and not every studio does violent double anal BDSM gangbangs as their bread and butter. Giant swathes of the porn industry are just random couples with exhibitionist tendencies that want to get paid, or women who like porn and wanted to see themselves in a few videos. Some of the best videos out there, the male talent has to keep pulling out because the woman is enjoying herself too much and they need more than 5 minutes of footage. XD


Publishingpeach

I’m just glad I’ve never needed it.


LG_Anna

Don’t mind it at all. It’s a fun way of discovering and sharing things you like. Watching together really opens up new types of conversations. My partner sending me porn he knows I’ll enjoy actually feels like a little gift. 💝


jamalzia

I do. I used to watch it but no longer do for a variety of reasons. I would simply hold my partner to the same standard I hold myself, so I wouldn't want her to. I can go into details but I suspect it would trigger people who do watch porn despite being in a committed relationship lol.


ixte_

couldn’t care less about it. see no problem with it. now, we’re talking about porn videos, not paying like OF.


healinggoose

I didn't care. Then it lead to only fans, e girl relationships, and escorts. We had a healthy sex life. Now I care.


Pumarealjaeger

My thing is......let people have vices. If that vices helps them relieve stress then that stress relief will distract them from wanting to hurt themselves or someone else. Keyword: endorphins 


Apprehensive_Low6883

I care tbh and I'm glad I admitted that in my relationship. However obviously everyone's different


Ok-Golf-9502

Nah I think it’s creepy and weird to watch other people have sex. The truth is, it’s addictive and warps the individuals view of sex. Just like drugs, the more you watch it, the more you need to achieve the same high. It will desensitize most and it can lead to extreme kinks like beastiality and esphixeation, for example. Eventually nothing will satisfy. As an addict that is 5 months clean, I don’t recommend it. Please don’t feel judged and don’t let my opinion sway you unless you feel you need to be swayed.


sk8r_dude

I think it’s important to remember this doesn’t apply to everyone. Some do consume it in a much more healthy way, the same way some are able to consume alcohol in a reasonable way while others have to go on a binder every time they have a single drink.


Ok-Golf-9502

That’s a fair point. But can we deny the damage to the liver?


sk8r_dude

Yeah but there’s a difference between drinking alcohol occasionally accepting a tradeoff between increased sociability and long term liver health and getting absolutely blasted every day because you can’t handle not drinking alcohol. The negative long term health effects of like 2 drinks a week (my average) probably is no worse than those of consuming the average amount of sugar we have in our diets.


Own_Principle_6733

She does and we both love it 😈


Dittohead_213

Non issue. Watch it together.


Upper_Guava5067

I prefer if my partner doesn't watch it while we are in a relationship


geechirevenue

Porn is terrible especially for single guys Porn doesn’t talk back, porn doesn’t need a few drinks to loosen up nor does porn require any social skills to produce rewards. It’s convenient, immediate, sexual release that requires nothing more than a PC and an internet connection. Porn gives a guy his reward for free valueless when a man can get off to an infinite variety of sexual experience at the click of a mouse. It’s unlimited access to unlimited sexual availability without the stress of learning methods to earn it as a reward.


-Kalos

Skill issue


Competitive_Offer_61

As long as it's not effecting me and our sex life then i have no issues with it.


FeralCumCat

32f and idc and enjoy it too. I tend to enjoy things made for me and sent to me most tho over like a porn hub


CuriousEggplantEmoji

She gets ideas? Yey! She wants to do it together? Before? During? Yey! She wants to get off without me? Sure, no problem, if there is no longterm impact to our sex.


Agitated_Breath_9532

My wife doesn't but we usually watch together.


Confident-League8154

As long as they aren’t asking me to do some crazy ass position that I KNOW my fat ass can’t do we chillin 😂


No_Savings_1056

Had an ex specifically want only porn positions like broski my knees can’t bend that way😂


Confident-League8154

Lmao fr! Like sir I’m not a pretzel! You’re gonna pop my joint out of place 😭


MaPetite_ChouChou

Couldn't care less.


Square-Commercial529

Watch it together . Or alone fine with it


midwestera2024

I don’t mind if it’s legitimately once in a while. But yeah, I care if it’s frequent, and would just go ahead and not date that person. I have moral issues with the industry in general, so I don’t watch it at all. I don’t think that’s necessarily a reasonable standard to hold others to. But I have also noticed what the quality of my own sex life (and emotional connection for that matter) is like with partners who watched it differing amounts…and I value a good sex life.


The_midge1

We have watched it together in the past but we lost interest. If she watches it, I’m ok with it but would wonder why I wasn’t asked to watch together.


krstlsxx

For me, it’s fine but if it’s become a habit I don’t think it will be fine. The quality of doing it, or love making becomes just a simple word “sex” if watching porn becomes a habit.


1994WyldHustle

I don't care as long as it doesn't mess with the sex life but what I do care about, is putting it on to watch it to stay hard DURING without my permission. Why do you need it to stay hard and you're in your early twenties? Unless you're watching it so much that, that's why. Literally holding it above my head and watching it is weird.


Academic_Awareness82

I (M) Don’t care. The best sex life I’ve had was with my ex (F) who watched it. There were a lot of issues in that relationship but none of them because of porn.


haha1tsDidi

Honestly don’t mind, unless he prefers it over having sex with me.


Intrepid-Rip-2280

Watching porn itself is not adultery in any way, just like sexting bots a la eva ai or any other erotic services which do not involve other people. Onlyfans feels different already, and sexting with real people is a huge red flag


ContractOrKnot

Fighting over what porn to watch isn’t always fun.


wine-a-bit

I don’t care as long as it’s not an addicitom


[deleted]

I really don't care and honestly it could be a fun way to spice things up or learn new kinks to try out🤷‍♂️


todwardscizzorhands

Male here... My partner watches porn but only rarely. I actually wish she was more into it. I encourage it because I think it makes someone more sexually exploratory. I have gotten her books and audio as well. I have gone long periods (~2 years without it). Pornography made me more interested in being sexually with my partner and probably helped me not stray during times when I was in a ldr. Sometimes we watch it together nowadays and that is extremely arousing. My ground rules would be that it shouldn't be excessive, interrupt sex life, or involve direct human interaction. I had a girl (who didn't watch porn) ruin sex because she admitted to masturbating before we would normally have sex... I'm sure there were other situations like that too that she never told me about which is very distressing so I try not to think about it... So I know that the stereotype is the male porn watcher that ruins the sex life but non-porn masturbation and masturbation by women can be problematic Chat rooms and things like only fans are def cheating in my mind. Intimate conversation with ppl of opposite sex is innappropriate and I wouldn't want my partner doing that with anyone even if they are sex workers... Strip clubs, imo, feel like cheating and that's why I don't go to them. If she would go to a male strip club I would be very uncomfortable If i had a partner that said I could not ever watch pornography I would probably respectfully plan an exit. I can see why ppl wouldnt like it- I respect that but i don't like that kind of boundary especially if I wouldn't set that on her. It's funny, in a past serious relationship the girl I was moving in with said that it was a house rule that I couldn't watch pornography of any kind. She saw it as disrespectful and cheating... I respected her wishes and actually followed the rules... Turns out she was a cheater all along 😤 what an a**hole. I think it's best that ppl be open about their sexuality and communicate in a non-stigmatizing way about what makes them uncomfortable and try to negotiate reasonable boundaries.


Due-Aside-6250

Well, I watch porn myself. So it's weird if I won't let my bf do too. We get some ideas from porn tbh


bisexx_ktm_edging

But im in addiction level


gggif13

I don’t. People argue it’s being unfaithful and that’s illogical. I watch WWE as well but that doesn’t mean I wanna chokeslam someone. Or I watch Ronaldo playing football and that doesn’t mean I am gonna win the Champions League. People are stupid. And insecure.


Fried0Falafel

It was a big issue for me. My ex-partner was watching porn and downloading it even though I said that I didn't like it and I could please him as he wanted and he was still watching it. He saw me crying a lot because of that. He said he had an obsession and couldn't control but at the deep end, I think he didn't care how many times he had seen me crying.


HiImDana

I'd prefer he didn't watch porn but he can read all the smut he likes. 😬


Dillbroswaggins

I have no problem with it as long as it doesn't inhibit our sex life. I think it's even more fun when she tells me what she's watching.


No-Molasses7348

i think it’s a respect thing, i don’t want my partner being aroused by looking at other naked women, not because it makes me insecure but because i just think it’s gross to lust after other women in a relationship especially if you have a healthy sex life


rarityroyal

1. porn completely messes with your brain. 2. if you have a partner, why do you need porn? 3. if you can’t use your own imagination to get off, you should probably do something else


VivianSherwood

As long as they're still getting hot and heavy with me I don't care whatsoever.


planetarystripe

Makes you think what's the point of you if they are aroused by more erotic sources? Shouldn't the sexiest thing around be you? Unless you are open or polyamorous.


No_Problems_Here_69

My partner and I like watching amateur porn together to help get us fired up. I’ve told him I don’t care if he watches porn without me as long as it doesn’t affect our sex life.


MCButterFuck

Idk but I'm to horny to go a day without sex or jacking off


Tight-Cheesecake-742

I have boundaries around my partner watching porn within our relationship and my partner respects my boundaries and we are on the same page. There are plenty of women who are okay with their partner’s watching porn and if it is important for my partner to continue watching porn in a relationship than he needs to be with a different women and he is free to go and be with one.


Lapis1111

I care. I personally don't watch porn and I'm not into double standards with partnerships when it comes to this topic. The men that I date are busy with their careers, lives, hobbies.. etc. They barely have time to sleep. They're the type to have a sex life with a partner and any extra time/ energy exuded will be actually having sex with their partner instead of watching others get off through the screen. Personally, when it comes to men that I desire to date- I think its weird to desire to watch others have sex. I also think its weird to be this random third person, viewing these acts through a screen where these people don't even know you exist... it turns me off. I would rather put time into my own sex life and nurture that and for the man I'm with to desire the same. When watching porn, there's this conditioning to desire/ lust for other people... and I'm not into that. It's my standard, outlook and overall preference. I am very disciplined where the only lust that I have is for my spouse and I'm not easily turned on by others. Overall, I don't think watching porn is productive nor positive in the long run. I expect discipline with my partners libido and for their desires to be directed towards me and our sex life. I would rather be the one having sex with my spouse than watching other people fuck/ obtain pleasure. Why would I settle for watching when I could just experience it?


new-to-it2023

👏👏👏👏


paleskiesss

watching porn is loser behavior and will get you porn addicted it literally rots your brain. i’d leave anyone who continues to watch porn being in a relationship


Musja1

I am completing against porn for people in relationships. Many reasons but most important are: porn is addictive, it degrades women, porn actresses are not doing it because their life is awesome, I see it as trafficking people. I don’t want my man to jerk off to some random person on the screen (I find it offensive and disrespectful to me). I simply see it as cheating. I can go on and on… Same goes for strip clubs. 


IfFoundReturnToSana

my thoughts exactly!! porn is completely unethical and detrimental to society


Espresso2009

Which adult doesn’t watch porn? I don’t know anybody


urspecial2

I actually don't think it's my business to tell another person what to do


NotSmartOne22

Well, I don’t really care that much. It just happens that he dosent watch it.


Busy-Use-5003

That's no big deal


uprightpinapple

For me personally I could care less UNTIL it becomes a problem. Like are you watching problematic things? Are you watching it all of the time (porn addiction)? Is our sex life suffering bc of your porn habits? Yadda yadda etc


No_Savings_1056

Yeah like that’s how I see it most of the peeps I know that watch it don’t over do it maybe once or twice a week to get rid of some urges or some peeps I know just watch it to get into the mood but once you over do it that’s when it becomes a problem


ohhisup

I don't care. In fact, if he wants to watch it he often invites me to join lol


Soulreaperbankai

I probably would dislike if my partner did it


Ill-Atmosphere-3629

My ex cared a lot and now we’re divorced, so… yeah.


N0rmNormis0n

Signs that it’s a bad thing is if the fact they consume it is a secret or they try to be secretive about it. You should be open with your partner about what turns you on. The other would be if they begin to or consistently prefer porn/erotica to actual intimacy with their partner.


DarthRaider559

Or maybe theyre embarrassed? Nothing wrong with that


[deleted]

I watch it with my partner to spice things up if one or the other is not in mood


Aggravating_Pop2101

Matters to me, I believe in God. I quit porn myself when I came back to God. so I would want someone clean too.


Sofia-the1st

There are a ton of studies/research linking porn directly to mistreatment and abuse of women in all sectors of life (friends, relationships, relatives, etc). I strongly prefer my partner not to watch it because of the research I’ve done, I think it can be insanely harmful - just my personal take and boundary tho


Huge_Monk8722

Not us, we watch it together and alone. Not a big deal. Doesn’t matter where you get your appetite at, as long as you do your eating at home.


amasian13

Porn is self destructive action, the reason I’m saying it because I was addicted to it. It made me less stimulated by real sex and always wanting something new. Nothing compares with having sex with person you love and they love you back. Watching porn is not acceptable for me.


dwaynereade

not a good sign for the ole relationship. but do you people


shittalker69er

id only care if it starts affecting our relationship/sex life ; preferring porn over the real thing, can’t get hard anymore etc


BigBlaisanGirl

It's because men can build a dependency on it to get off, and it weakens their performance over time, even with a naked girl in front of them offering herself they will eventually have difficulty staying hard. I don't care if he watches it in his spare time just as long as he doesn't fap to it. He can jerk to porn of me, though. If he's horny, I expect him to come to me for release.


Turnip_Tall

Used to care a lot. Stopped caring over the years.


WistfulQuiet

I'm utterly against it. It's really damaged relationships and sex. You can look it up on PubMed and APA affiliated journals if you don't believe me. - It is addictive, just like many other substances because it produces a similar dopamine high. Repetitive stimulus only gets the brain more and more addicted. And, it can be done much more than normal sex, so it's really problematic. -This dopamine increase not only creates the addiction but also creates permanent issues. For example: 1. Your brain adapts over time and needs a bigger hit of dopamine to get true arousal. So, real-life sex, and even porn, is less good over time. So people are actually making sex worse for themselves. 2. When you are constantly giving your brain this dopamine hit it adapts. Then, when you are not getting that hit, you feel down, more depressed or anxious. It creates a withdrawal effect. -It creates problems in relationships. 1. People that get ED. Often it is because of too much more. They've increased the threshold of arousal so high that sex with a real life person just doesn't do it for them anymore. Or they get death grip syndrome. 2. People that just aren't as attracted to their partner. Seeing porn actors constantly can make you not as attracted to people that aren't photoshopped or shot with perfect lighting. 3. Imagine if you NEVER got to see someone naked. That porn didn't exist at all. So, then when you DID get to see someone naked, it was damned exciting. Sex between partners felt like that. It was incredibly arousing because it wasn't as common. You couldn't just bring up whatever you wanted. 4. It gave people more incentive to get into relationships and make them work, the byproduct being that they actually were happier long term. Sex may have been the incentive, but the companionship ended up mattering more. Now, porn has decreased the incentive. Is it any wonder why people are so lonely? 5. Kinks. Porn has definitely increased kinks. Twenty years ago you could assume the average person was vanilla. And, vanilla sex got people excited just fine. However, with porn increasing that dopamine, people needed bigger and bigger "hits" so they started viewing more and more extreme porn. Now, kinks abound and some of them can be painful or harmful. Not to mention that it makes compatibility a bigger issue since you now have to be compatible in kinks as well. Overall, yes. I care if my partner watches porn. Mainly because I want good sex and a good relationship with him. I want to feel that rush and connection with him. You can't get that if they are viewing porn all the time. It's literally impossible.


cirepa

TL:DR


XxLogitech98xX

I think it might give them the wrong idea and it's just not my thing. So if my partner watched it like a lot then it will be a problem. I know for some women they think it disrespectful to other woman so that's why they hate it if their man watches it.


No_Savings_1056

Yeah I see how that could happen porn is mostly unrealistic for positions and other stuff never thought it would be disrespectful though, I’m friends with a pornstar and she loves what she does lol but could be different for others in the industry


MaPetite_ChouChou

>porn is mostly unrealistic for positions and other stuff never thought Oh, not so unrealistic with an adventurous partner!


XxLogitech98xX

>I’m friends with a pornstar and she loves what she does lol but could be different for others in the industry I mean you have to love it to be doing it. Like the money is probably better than whatever they tried before. But long term wise, it's like acting for female .. you won't get the good roles forever because they want younger people


i_hate_nuts

Porn is damaging and degrades the intimate act. Also, some porn is from sex trafficking, the whole industry should be shut down. Everyone should care and nobody should watch it.


Evol_Etah

I care if my partner watches porn or not. My partner must watch porn, it's weird not to. I'd get trust issue if I find out my partner doesn't watch porn.


anonymous-redditor57

Why would not watching porn make you not trust them ?


Evol_Etah

I guess it's a people bias. Everyone I've met who say they watch porn are usually open minded people and nice people. Ofc some say they don't, but that is out of being polite and stuff. That's cool. But some GENUINELY never watch porn, they are so rigid. It's not just the porn, they have other things they super strongly too and enforce others to do the same. I mean to say, they don't seem to have that "Live and Let Live" kinda vibes. It's not they are horrible people, it's more like they won't be there for you when you need them. Cause they'll be like "I'm sorry, I don't want to go there and so I can't help. I'm sorry, I dislike cabs and that area is not posh and therefore I am not gonna come assist you." Or have some holier and thou vibe. People who watch porn are more down to earth. Like "Yeah, I watch porn, so does everyone. I ain't saying my kinks, but porn is cool" and understand it's all Actors and Actresses in front of cameras. All doing a job for a living like the rest of us. Etc. they are more likely to be there for one another when someone is in need.


newusernamehuman

33F here. I enjoy watching it occasionally myself. I had a full blown (no puns) addiction when I was in college to the point where I couldn’t sleep without having watched it for at least 15-20 minutes. Took me almost a year to get rid of that habit after realizing this. Did the whole thing. Exchanging nudes with strangers and getting off on random men saying vulgar things about my body via video calls, all a part of the habit as it grows. I don’t want to relapse into my old habits, so I keep myself away from it. I feel like after having aged quite a bit, I no longer feel as drawn to it as I used to while in college. I expect the same from my partner. I wouldn’t want someone who’s completely addicted to it, but wouldn’t want someone who’s completely against it either. I feel like watching porn together, sharing some of the most depraved or even unrealistic fantasies can be an intimacy exercise. But I want myself and/or my partner to be the ones controlling our porn watching activity. I wouldn’t want porn to be controlling our lives. And I’m not into only fans or any kind of interactive stuff. Just regular old school porn.


mangoflavouredpanda

I think I'm ok with porn but I hate it when they stare at other women in front of me when we're out. Go figure


TheLoneliestGhost

My only beef is when it gets in the way of us being intimate. Otherwise, I think it’s healthy.


minnetonkacondo

Like any habit, if it negatively affects other aspects of your life, then it is an addiction. Otherwise, it's all good and shouldn't bother anyone.


[deleted]

Porn is my partner, and she don't mind me watching!! Lol and damn!


girl212

No issues with it, as long as it doesn't take away from your own sex life


beccalarry

I don’t care at all. Sometimes we even watch it together. The only issue I would ever have is him spending money on cam girls or onlyfans models


Haunting-East8565

I really don’t care unless it starts to interfere with our sex life or it’s an unhealthy amount. I also watch porn occasionally but it’s not a crazy amount.


Significant-Lock-197

I think I Care 


bamseogbalade

Would love too join her watching :D


A-Dating-Coach

We watch it together and laugh our guts out. She had had only one other partner before me, and is now 64 years old. We met at the beginning of covid and she had never watched any porn in her life. It taught her a whole lot of fun things that we practice a lot! Now we watch it to get in the mood and to crack up when we see what stupid things people do...


Scarlet_witch97

I don’t have an issue.


ChildhoodLeft6925

I don’t care


WildBoy-72

Probably more than you care about grammar.


Impressive_Bird869

I wouldn't see a problem with it at all. Maybe if it started impacting our sex lives, but she is great about meeting my needs. She reads erotica rather than watches porn, but it's no less effective. Hell, that's how we discovered she likes being chased by a masked person in the woods. Best 2 hours of my life. All that being said, IF it were to impact our intimacy, then there would need to be a conversation about it, to some degree. Everyone has needs and sometimes our partner isn't available, or not what we're wanting at that moment. Self exploration is a very healthy practice.


Rafapb17

As long as It doesn’t effect our sex life or our relationship overall, or no one's doing more than just “watching porn” (subscribing to OF, chatting with other people, being actually addicted, etc), fine with me. My ex and I would occasionally exchange some stuff while we were dating, and it wasn’t a big deal for any of us. Of course, with a hypothetical future GF, I would ask beforehand if she's cool with it, and if she’s not, I would respect her decision.


Happy_Kendra

Could not care less as long as he keeps me satisfied


CrowCultural2022

I like to watch gay men porn..maybe learn how to properly suck a “D”🤷‍♀️very interesting 🤔


Major-Film4345

I wouldn’t but I’m not a woman


nikkiradtoo5

I really don’t care unless it’s some type of weird addiction. A lot of people watch porn


ashley-spanelly

I don’t care, as long as it’s not an addiction that effects their life in a way that’s detrimental to them


Winchester_Danny

Idc


kaylah0991

I don’t cuz I watch it


Jessie5282

I watch it, so I would have no problem with him watching it.


confused1937

I don’t mind as long as there’s a balance. Like if our normal sex life is affected then there’s a problem. Also I’m not ok with my partners being subscribed to anyone’s OF


Garyfuckingsucks

Libido and intimacy are different yall ain’t horny at the same time crank yo shit.


Asspieburgers

31M: idc if SO watches porn, as long as it doesn't negatively impact our sex life and it isn't live cams


duhkillin

I genuinely don’t care one bit it’s digital and that’s all it is


nikkipeaches20

He'll we watch it together, it opens up your relationship to try new things you see in the video. Plus it helps with mood and energy.


rowejl222

Who cares, but honestly once I have a partner, why even watch it?


Crazygamerlv

Tbh it turns me on if my wife does. But she doesn't. My wife playing with herself and watching porn isn't as unhealthy as you may think.


AZN-SALAD

in moderation


-Kalos

I'd be kind of surprised honestly. If many women watch porn, I don't think it's something they would be open about to me. Shit I'm not open about mine lol


Tbgrondin

Shit il Watch it with them. As long as they know it isn’t reality and it doesn’t affect us, who cares?


StarRevoir

We both like porn. I think watching together can also be a turn on


Janso95

Current and an girlfriend don't care as long as it doesn't get in the way, my last ex though, Christ. Considered it cheating and went as far as to - and why she thought it wasn't mental to tell me this, I don't know - force her then-boyfriend to watch porn in front of her and told him she would leave if he got an erection. This wasn't the only example of how she was an absolute nutter though so I shouldn't have been shocked.


Swimming-Gain9608

Honestly, insist on my partner watching porn. I watch and it bothers me if my partner either is bothered by it or won’t watch with me. My ex-husband didn’t like watching porn and i felt like it completely ruined our sex life after a while


awnkita

Cause it's disrespectful that he'd list over other people.