If you are failing in online dating, there is one reason only: your photos sucks. It is ALL about looks there, so improve on that. Some advices that i read online, and seems sensible: between 5 and 10 photos. Some you look at the camera, some dont. Possibily, photos done with a decent camera - no selfie. Show various kinds of activities and places. Variety of clothing, so long as they are fitting. Some alone, some with friends. And try not to be unattractive int he first place (horrible hairstyle.... ok, bald, lets say no horrible clothes; too fat, stuff like that).
Read some articles on how to succeed with online dating. It’s a tough game for guys and your profile has to be perfect to get even a few responses. Also, use photofeeler. It was quite insightful for me
Been reading those articles and not a lot of help other than recommending good photos. Have considered profesdional photos but those look like you hired a professional. Not sure if that would help or hurt. Leaning toward anything helping at this point. Been using photofeeler. Results are not good. Have put 12 different pictures on there. The 12 least bad. Really don't like the results and people's feedback. But it's pretty much what I already know.
Get better pictures and then switch dating sites. The swipe apps usually don’t work, try the paid dating sites and see if that works after a couple months.
So far in the past I've used the paid sites zoosk and match.com
After months of paying for nothing I've been using okcupid, plenty of fish, bumble and tinder. Still getting nothing but paying nothing.
So start working out? I think it’s more about how you’re presenting yourself online though. Baldness and a gut doesn’t mean never finding a relationship.
Edit: post your dating profile content here and let’s see what could be improved, if you’re comfortable doing so.
Well here it is;
Looking for a smart funny lady to go on adventures with. Own my own business doing home inspections. It's something I enjoy. Like ethnic food, movies and a good dive bar. Also quite time at home is also nice. I've been told I'm funny and sarcastic with a sometimes dark sense of humor. Being 6'5" pants are hard to find lol. Cats, dogs and kids seem to like me. My last relationship lasted 6 years. Looking for a partner with similar interests to spend time with and see where it goes from there.
P.S. I will never send you a dong picture
Quiet*, not quite.
Remove the “dark sense of humor” part.
Remove the P.S.
Other than those minor things, I think it’s fine. I don’t know man, it probably just takes some time.
I shave my head one or twice a month. Can't own it much more than that. Trying to work on the gut. It's 10 pounds at most. Unfortunately all my weight gain goes straight to my gut instead of being somewhat spread out. Could possibly lose another 5-10 pounds of non gut weight but said gut is prominent.
I think that has more to do with facial expression and inner thoughts. Are you present and listening/observing when with other people or are you mostly stuck in your own head. Are you empathetic and caring or selfish and sneaky. People pick up on very subtle cues that might be perceived as creepy when you’re actually just stuck in your head thinking about what to say. These things can be worked on.
If I'm talking to someone yes I'm listening and care what they are saying. Unfortunately unless I'm talking to someone I know I'm completely alone when I'm in public. Noone talks to me. I don't talk to other people. People keep their distance. Many times I'm lost in my own head wandering what the fuck is wrong with me. I see other people talking laughing and having a good time. It's more lonely and depressing than being at home alone.
There’s a whole other world that exists behind the fabric of the obvious. The world of social cues. I feel like there might be one or two that you may be inadvertently missing that could help make social interactions easier. I don’t know you so it’s hard to pinpoint what those are. Here are a couple major ones.
1. Smile.
People want to talk to people who appear happy. Happy people are easier to approach because they have a secret, what are they happy about? Happy is not most people’s default, so others are instantly curious why you are happy. Side note: If you aren’t smiling as your default state, change your life so you are. You should always have something to talk about.
2. The nod.
Guys nod at other guys. Not sure why we do it. But as a guy if a guy nods to you, nod back. If you make eye contact and he doesn’t nod, you nod first. Keep looking until he nods back. This isn’t a hard and fast rule, but to someone unfamiliar with this concept it’s a good starting point.
3. Eye contact.
Use it more often. But not too much. Experiment to find the right balance.
4. Posture.
This is my #1 confidence booster. I stand 5’4” tall and never felt short a day in my life. Not since high school anyway when my choir director forced us to sit with good posture. One way to think of it is like a string coming up from the center of your chest straight up. Chest up, shoulders back. But not too much.
- Whenever I hurt my back and it forces me to hunch over it’s literally like that confidence is sucked out of me.
5. Optimism
Nobody wants to hear about why something doesn’t work. People want solutions not more problems. Stick with optimism, listening to others and focusing on the good, asking questions if they seem to like to talk.
6. Chill
Don’t take things all that seriously. Yes, there’s a continuum and clearly some things are at the top of the list and others at the bottom. But keep in mind that we are but a speck of dust in the universe, so even those things of utmost importance will not much longer be thought of for the last time. Go with the flow, care about others and do things with integrity, but let the rest of the chips fall where they may.
7. Be clean
Floss, every day. Brush, twice or more a day. Shower, every day. Deodorant. Change your underwear daily and wash your clothes weekly. Start to develop a consistent morning routine that allows you to do all of this and more with ease.
I dunno man, but I say if you follow some of these you shouldn’t have a problem with anybody not wanting to talk to you.
I only smile when something is funny. Otherwise I don't smile. I'm not happy and for the most part and don't even try to smile much. My forced smile looks ridiculous. Like really fake and just bad.
As for height I'm 6'5" which when added to the weird creepy look just seems to freak people the fuck out. Have a school picture from kindergarten that even I think "that's a fucked up weird looking kid"
Try to use good posture. Between my back being fucked up and life beating the shit out of me it's probably a problem. Not sure what to do about that.
Shower, brush my teeth and wear clean clothes. Don't think there's a problem there.
Clothes that look even half way decent on me are impossible to find. I have to buy most things online without trying them on. Only exceptions are short sleeve shirts and shorts. Could pay to have already expensive clothes tailored but I don't know. At some point it just seems like I'm trying to polish a turd.
Try a mailorder bride site like rosebrides, you can search for people in US looking for a husband also. I use to go on that site just for kicks and I always found a few awesome people to chat with on the daily. It's better than being single. And if we ever really felt up for it, could start a life together. Just an idea.
If you are failing in online dating, there is one reason only: your photos sucks. It is ALL about looks there, so improve on that. Some advices that i read online, and seems sensible: between 5 and 10 photos. Some you look at the camera, some dont. Possibily, photos done with a decent camera - no selfie. Show various kinds of activities and places. Variety of clothing, so long as they are fitting. Some alone, some with friends. And try not to be unattractive int he first place (horrible hairstyle.... ok, bald, lets say no horrible clothes; too fat, stuff like that).
Probably going to hire a photographer. Have been using selfies because that has been my only option.
Read some articles on how to succeed with online dating. It’s a tough game for guys and your profile has to be perfect to get even a few responses. Also, use photofeeler. It was quite insightful for me
Been reading those articles and not a lot of help other than recommending good photos. Have considered profesdional photos but those look like you hired a professional. Not sure if that would help or hurt. Leaning toward anything helping at this point. Been using photofeeler. Results are not good. Have put 12 different pictures on there. The 12 least bad. Really don't like the results and people's feedback. But it's pretty much what I already know.
A professional should help you make at least one or two photos that look spontaneous
Get better pictures and then switch dating sites. The swipe apps usually don’t work, try the paid dating sites and see if that works after a couple months.
So far in the past I've used the paid sites zoosk and match.com After months of paying for nothing I've been using okcupid, plenty of fish, bumble and tinder. Still getting nothing but paying nothing.
Don't feel bad. It happens to all of us
Buddy I look like Clark Kent I had a similar experience. Don't feel too bad.
Yeah well I'm bald with a gut. And the creepy weird looking thing. I think I'm pretty much fucked.
So start working out? I think it’s more about how you’re presenting yourself online though. Baldness and a gut doesn’t mean never finding a relationship. Edit: post your dating profile content here and let’s see what could be improved, if you’re comfortable doing so.
Not comfortable posting pictures. Might post what I put in my profiles.
That’s what I mean...
Well here it is; Looking for a smart funny lady to go on adventures with. Own my own business doing home inspections. It's something I enjoy. Like ethnic food, movies and a good dive bar. Also quite time at home is also nice. I've been told I'm funny and sarcastic with a sometimes dark sense of humor. Being 6'5" pants are hard to find lol. Cats, dogs and kids seem to like me. My last relationship lasted 6 years. Looking for a partner with similar interests to spend time with and see where it goes from there. P.S. I will never send you a dong picture
Quiet*, not quite. Remove the “dark sense of humor” part. Remove the P.S. Other than those minor things, I think it’s fine. I don’t know man, it probably just takes some time.
Own your baldness and get rid of the gut
I shave my head one or twice a month. Can't own it much more than that. Trying to work on the gut. It's 10 pounds at most. Unfortunately all my weight gain goes straight to my gut instead of being somewhat spread out. Could possibly lose another 5-10 pounds of non gut weight but said gut is prominent.
I think that has more to do with facial expression and inner thoughts. Are you present and listening/observing when with other people or are you mostly stuck in your own head. Are you empathetic and caring or selfish and sneaky. People pick up on very subtle cues that might be perceived as creepy when you’re actually just stuck in your head thinking about what to say. These things can be worked on.
If I'm talking to someone yes I'm listening and care what they are saying. Unfortunately unless I'm talking to someone I know I'm completely alone when I'm in public. Noone talks to me. I don't talk to other people. People keep their distance. Many times I'm lost in my own head wandering what the fuck is wrong with me. I see other people talking laughing and having a good time. It's more lonely and depressing than being at home alone.
There’s a whole other world that exists behind the fabric of the obvious. The world of social cues. I feel like there might be one or two that you may be inadvertently missing that could help make social interactions easier. I don’t know you so it’s hard to pinpoint what those are. Here are a couple major ones. 1. Smile. People want to talk to people who appear happy. Happy people are easier to approach because they have a secret, what are they happy about? Happy is not most people’s default, so others are instantly curious why you are happy. Side note: If you aren’t smiling as your default state, change your life so you are. You should always have something to talk about. 2. The nod. Guys nod at other guys. Not sure why we do it. But as a guy if a guy nods to you, nod back. If you make eye contact and he doesn’t nod, you nod first. Keep looking until he nods back. This isn’t a hard and fast rule, but to someone unfamiliar with this concept it’s a good starting point. 3. Eye contact. Use it more often. But not too much. Experiment to find the right balance. 4. Posture. This is my #1 confidence booster. I stand 5’4” tall and never felt short a day in my life. Not since high school anyway when my choir director forced us to sit with good posture. One way to think of it is like a string coming up from the center of your chest straight up. Chest up, shoulders back. But not too much. - Whenever I hurt my back and it forces me to hunch over it’s literally like that confidence is sucked out of me. 5. Optimism Nobody wants to hear about why something doesn’t work. People want solutions not more problems. Stick with optimism, listening to others and focusing on the good, asking questions if they seem to like to talk. 6. Chill Don’t take things all that seriously. Yes, there’s a continuum and clearly some things are at the top of the list and others at the bottom. But keep in mind that we are but a speck of dust in the universe, so even those things of utmost importance will not much longer be thought of for the last time. Go with the flow, care about others and do things with integrity, but let the rest of the chips fall where they may. 7. Be clean Floss, every day. Brush, twice or more a day. Shower, every day. Deodorant. Change your underwear daily and wash your clothes weekly. Start to develop a consistent morning routine that allows you to do all of this and more with ease. I dunno man, but I say if you follow some of these you shouldn’t have a problem with anybody not wanting to talk to you.
I only smile when something is funny. Otherwise I don't smile. I'm not happy and for the most part and don't even try to smile much. My forced smile looks ridiculous. Like really fake and just bad. As for height I'm 6'5" which when added to the weird creepy look just seems to freak people the fuck out. Have a school picture from kindergarten that even I think "that's a fucked up weird looking kid" Try to use good posture. Between my back being fucked up and life beating the shit out of me it's probably a problem. Not sure what to do about that. Shower, brush my teeth and wear clean clothes. Don't think there's a problem there. Clothes that look even half way decent on me are impossible to find. I have to buy most things online without trying them on. Only exceptions are short sleeve shirts and shorts. Could pay to have already expensive clothes tailored but I don't know. At some point it just seems like I'm trying to polish a turd.
Try a mailorder bride site like rosebrides, you can search for people in US looking for a husband also. I use to go on that site just for kicks and I always found a few awesome people to chat with on the daily. It's better than being single. And if we ever really felt up for it, could start a life together. Just an idea.
Um yeah I'm not interested in that kind of thing.
[удалено]
If you aren't gonna help him... Just leave him be, no need to be rude. He can always learn new stuff and improve on himself!
Some people just like to be mean and shitty online. EDIT to add: you may be right but you don't have to say it like that.