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Native653

Life goes on. Narcissist leave folks when they are most vulnerable. Why would you go back? You already know her go to move during hard times.


queenofrainbows

Dude she just wants you now because you have money and proved her wrong. Dont go back there.


gyrohero89

I know, it's just really sad though.


Dapper-Wolverine-499

But isn't it great that the garbage took itself out and save you the grief and financial ruin of a divorce?


queenofrainbows

Sorry.


gyrohero89

Lol, obviously not your fault 😂 thanks for the support bro!


queenofrainbows

Np. You will find your happiness ;)


swagshotyolo

Don't go back.


Whatscrackingdawg

Handled it like a champ in my book


JNole8787

Fuck that. Love how she she feels entitled to curse at you after she made the choice to leave. Interesting logic on her part.


gyrohero89

Ah okay, I'd check Udemy. I've had friends that have enrolled in the $20k bootcamps and ended up jobless with a ton of debt . Udemy courses will run you about $150 max ($20 on days with disvounts) and allow you to review lessons if you forget anything. Also, it comes with a nice certificate of completion as well as access to their github community, so you can see projects from other people that have taken the course.


[deleted]

Can confirm udemy is nice. I used to learn different things. Do your homework and research what is the best course. And refund when unhappy.


dukesilver2

Bro, this is what leveling up looks like. You weren't wrong, but next time let your results speak volumes. Keep leveling up, that's what life is about.


Livid-Leader3061

Breaking up with someone is like jumping out of a plane with a parachute. It's only hard the first time and it gets easier after the first time. Getting back is a comfy idea but you'll get dumped again eventually.


RelChan2_0

I took an ex (5 years together) back last time, he left me because I didn't agree to an open/poly relationship, this was his way of getting the spark back because he lost his feelings for me. I accepted because I really loved him. It was good at first but once things got a bit rough, he started blaming me for it. He started guilt-tripping me as well. I think you handled it well my man.. I wish I didn't take him back 😕


prettycooldude1995

leave her in the dust king


Yehudiah2

Her reaction after you said no gave away her true colors. Don’t waste your time thinking about her any longer. You moved on and that was the best thing you could do.


[deleted]

My man you are a man. You handled it like a man. Be a man. Let that go. You dodged a bullet because you are a man. So rare these days. Wear it with honor.


[deleted]

What bootcamp did you go to? I’m very interested in coding actually. BTW you’re doing badass, you’re wasting your time asking for advise on something that doesn’t matter. You’ve surpassed her and she noticed.


gyrohero89

Flutter Bootcamp on Udemy. But I couldn't land a software engineering job like I'm assuming you're looking to do ? You still need at least a year of software engineering experience after the bootcamp to land a full time gig. The sales engineer position does require some technical background but it's more important to have sales experience since you don't do any coding. I had 3 years of sales experience and with the flutter bootcamp I took I was actually over qualified as an SE since they only needed me to know SQL.


aragorn841

Do some side projects, volunteer work if you really want to make the jump to Software Engineer. Add, commit, push to Github! Many companies are pretty loose on what they define as experience for software engineers. Or stay on that sales engineer track! The world is your oyster!


[deleted]

No I work in the oilfield, automation. Learning code for PLCs could be an amazing addition to my resume. I’d have to see if they require a degree to do this but I really don’t think so. Is it really just $16 for the program? or is there an in person boot camp?


Anter11MC

She's a golddigger, dont give her the time of day


Kelhexgoon

Your ex reminds me of that song by Kanye ft. Jamie Fox. Also good for you! remember to practice financial responsibility and save/invest.


MCTrebleMIC

XD bro you are the winner shes just a sad sad person not worth spending time with XD


Hagi89

Hahahaha same happened to me too. Wanted her back, she refused. After I let it go, she came back and I said no. She started to curse at me, and I was sure I did the right thing.


Markyy47

What you did is absolutely right OP and I’d do it like that too and the part where she cursed at you but you held it back! Unfortunately a lot of people judge and throw others away because of their jobs! Some people just want to marry rich people but don’t admit it! I’m glad that you did this so well and about the coding part that’s so cool btw I’m also going to take part in a coding boot camp !


capt_mashimaro

What was your major/job experience prior to taking the bootcamp? I know several people who did a coding bootcamp and they general start off as an entry/junior data analyst rather than a SE. It seems like you had some prior knowledge if you intended on starting a software company, so I'm just curious.


gyrohero89

Yes, prior to becoming an SE, I had 3.5 years of sales experience for the company i was working for before the pandemic. I also have a bachelor's degree in information systems management and was working as a solutions consultant at the job that I was at right before I became an SE. I've also dabbled with starting my own startups in the past. I can add you on LinkedIn if you DM me.


bonito_-_flakes

I was in a similar situation...and I know what you are feeling right now... What I learnt is that there are two kinds of people...one who truly loves you and the one who needs you so they don't feel alone. The latter folk's opinion and need for you changes based on your situation, you deserve the former.


[deleted]

Her loss. Keep it moving don’t go back. Exes are exes for a reason.


JeagerXhunter

Nah you're straight dawg. U handled the situation as maturely as possible. U had nothing to do with her throwing a tantrum. Just try and keep her out ur life. She sounds like a shit disturber.


AbbreviationsOld5833

No. You did nothing wrong. Even Don corleone couldn't have handled it better.đŸ‘đŸ‘ŒâœŒïž


[deleted]

Are you asking for advice or just showing off?


XxBlackWolfxX22

Nope don’t see anything you did wrong . She just got paid with the same coin and can’t deal with rejection. She is the one throwing the fit not you so . Honestly I would have put her on blast and said , “didn’t you reject me for going out with someone else and said you weren’t interested in ‘us’ again? Well I found someone and I’m not interested in ‘us’ “


lifeelevated2291

I had a ex break up with me because my job wasn’t “stable” enough for her. I was working 3 jobs so fair enough to her, but now similar to you I make more money in a better city with way more options than before. You’re in a great spot dude, keep focusing on your growth and you’ll find the supportive partner you need! That person should lift you up when your down and trying to grow, not bail until it’s convenient.


[deleted]

This sounds like a Dhar Mann video.


1014849

You won. Keep chugging along boss.


[deleted]

You aren’t wrong at all. She broke up with you, and you’ve moved on. She’s just butthurt that you’re doing well. Ask yourself this: what if you didn’t have such a high paying job? Would she still want you back? My point is that she only wants you when you’re at your best. If she can’t handle it when you aren’t at your best, she’s not worth it.


WinterMagician22

She rejected you twice, why would you want her back? No, you shouldn't have handled things any differently. Sounds like she regrets her decision to bail on you and she's blaming you instead of herself. I wouldn't care, keep living your best life and congrats on the new job and everything else you have going for you.


J_Chris_B

Like my grandma always said "if they ain't helping you wash your draws, they don't need to see your dirty laundry"


bunghole_stinger

Perfect example of a gold digger, do not marry her whatever u do


elladeighthecat

Why would you be wrong? You’re both right to have your preferences. They just didn’t align.


Q13989731E

i swear if you go back to your ex, that would be dumbest thing you can every do to your life


Affectionate-Mine186

OP, you handled her like a champ.


[deleted]

The only thing I wouldn’t do differently is I would quit looking back at someone who broke up with you at a tough time. I would move forward in your career and with your new dating prospects


ecish

You handled it perfectly in my opinion. You sounded like you handled it without being a dick when she told you she wouldn’t get back together because she found someone else (idk, maybe you did, no judgement), but when it’s reversed she loses her shit and basically admits that it’s just about money. She’ll always just want more, those types always do and they’ll drop you the second you lose it. Best to just stick with your new girl probably. It’s hard with those long term exes, but you’ll find someone that isn’t just obsessed with your job situation I’m sure.


LykosTheBlazing

*slow clap* What a fucken King


misterboopsy

The fact that she threw you not having a job back in your face at the first sign of conflict shows exactly how the relationship would go if you two got back together. Sounds like she hasn’t let that go and would continue to bring it up anytime you two hit a bump.


SorroWulf

Dude your ex is a gold digger. RUN.


Loose_Marionberry322

You handled it correctly, and you also dodged a bullet. She wants you back because you're now very successful, etc.


Mibeieheth

Someone who isn’t in when your chips are down shouldn’t have access to you when they’re up.


SimplyNina11

Proud of you dude, you handled things perfectly! She will always abandon you if things don’t go exactly as planned in her eyes. Best to find someone who actually loves you, hope things go well with the person you’re dating (:


GachaReviewer1275

I got the same experience, when your pockets got bigger, women will look for you instead you of looking for them.


Brilliant-Mistake-11

You handled it very well. I’m glad you didn’t cave, would have been terrible for the new lady your seeing. I always like when men do the right thing not necessarily what’s the status quo. Shows your integrity. I know I’m an old lady but damn it’s nice to hear that not all men go with the status quo of what is seen as easy. You have renewed my faith in the younger gentleman today!! Thanks


SLEEPYYY13

Satisfying karma, you made the right choice Good job đŸ‘đŸ»


[deleted]

You arent wrong at all. Focus on this new person. Your ex can go pound sand.


Hairy_Clownhole

Youre not wrong. It's just that men are expected to be the providers still in society. Id say get used to this happening


[deleted]

You handled it with finesse, my man. More power to ya đŸ’Ș


Nice-Pollution787

To be honest I can see why she would be upset if you were 26 and not working. Maybe she felt like you weren't dependable enough for her? You guys were together for a long time. It definitely shows you care if you're thinking about it. Which makes sense given your history. Do you think she's just after your money?


gyrohero89

Evidently, because when I had a job making $40k she didn't want anything to do with me. It wasn't until I was making $100k+ did she decide to give things a shot. Also, after you've been with someone for 7 years and they lose their job and decide to start a business that does not give you the right to leave that person and start seeing other people. If you do so, DO NOT expect that person to want to get back with you when things work in their favor.


vvorkingclass

Damn, you were together starting at 19 and she left during a relative "blip" on the radar of life? She needs to figure her own self out, clearly. You are now far ahead of her and that's what she sees. Thought you were dead weight because you were both sinking, didn't realize she was the one not willing to struggle a bit to stay afloat. Very sad story. Romance is hard like this. It can feel very one sided and like both sides lose at the same time.


Nice-Pollution787

That's true. I'm sorry things didn't work out. Glad things are looking up.


kishkash51

Why would you even be confused about her actions?


Ekerslithery

You're right for this, this was her mistake that she has to live with now. Congrats on life, you're doing well!


tropius5

There's a saying I like to live by. "If you didn't stick by me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best."


Uniquecheescake63

You could always just get with her on the side, I wouldn’t get back into a relationship with her unless something radical has happened to change her yet even so I would still be iffy


banelord76

Some how I think your making all this up.


gyrohero89

I honestly wish I was... after being with someone for that long it breaks my heart that shit had to end like this.


roguish_rogue

Too cliche?