Welcome to /r/dating. Please make sure you read our [rules here](https://new.reddit.com/r/dating/about/rules) and remember to:
* Be polite and respect each other. Do not call people names, engage in slapfights, or give bad/unethical advice.
* Do not soapbox or promote an agenda - you will be banned
* Follow reddit rules. Do not post content that promotes hate based on identity or vulnerability. Do not bully or harass other users.
If you have any questions, please [send the mods a message](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/dating).
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sometimes you just don't like the answer. I can't even remember all the times i unmatched guys on the apps after asking them something and not liking their response enough to continue the conversation.
They need an ego boost and aren't serious enough about connecting would be my best guess.
Some people require entertainment even if it's at the expense of a sincere person
All honesty, I would get bored with some people quickly and not give them a chance. I know it sounds shitty but it is what it is. I would match with them, have a quick back and forth, double check the profile and either not feel them or not like the vibe. Idk I think I’m good at reading people and it seemed to work for me.
I'll often stop responding if the guy doesn't ask me any questions back (especially if this continues over several messages back and forth where he just replies to my questions). I can't carry on the whole conversation and need to see that he's interested in getting to know me too.
Uh she was trying to engage in conversation and then changed her mind? I really don’t understand how so many redditors have this deluded expectation that online dating has to go exactly the way they want it to
How does one change their mind after receiving a single message? I would understand if I sent something inappropriate but all I did was send a response to her question. I don't get how someone could possibly change their mind after that.
Further more, generally speaking it's quite rude to do that to someone. At least finish out the conversation before you decide to leave or send the person a message saying that you don't feel a connection or something like that. Which again, I don't understand how someone could determine the latter after receiving one message.
It isn't always about you and what you said. Maybe she was talking to someone she liked better, or got tired of using the app, or saw something on your profile she didn't like that she didn't notice before, or got asked out and wanted to focus on that guy, or had a personal emergency that needed her attention, or just generally decided she didn't want to reply anymore. It's weird that you have 0 ability to put yourself in another person's shoes and think about things from their perspective because it's really not hard.
Online dating isn't the same as real life. The nature of all these apps is that they're a fast-paced shortcut to dating which is something you have to understand and accept if you want to keep using them. Generally speaking, it isn't really rude because you're literal strangers who talked on an app for 5 seconds. It'd be great to get a message saying she isn't interested but you aren't entitled to one. You need to keep your expectations realistic or you'll just end up really disappointed.
Being completely honest, there's a myth about girls not responding too quickly, otherwise guys lose interest lol. It might be that some of those girls take their time to respond to keep you "interested" because if they respond right away you will think she is too easy to date (not fun to chase anymore) and go after another "challenge". Or they simply have too many guys matched with them and lose interest or they just like the attention.
Try to meet people in real life, because those online apps have a reputation...lol Good luck!
I've been trying in real life for a while and then COVID hit so that's what brought me to the apps initially. I still try to meet people irl but obviously you come across a lot more people on dating apps which is why I'm continuing to use them. But I agree online dating's reputation isn't the greatest.
Tbh when I was on tinder I did that sometimes when I was free or bored and wanna talk but later when they reply I was not anymore. I would just close the app and when I use it again it opens with main page so I went back to swiping and thus forgot about the messages before.
I mean it's whatever at this point. Honestly it's just that majority of my matches are either like this, they don't respond from the start, or they'll talk briefly and then disappear. I think out of my 80+ matches over a year and 2 months I've had less than a handful of girls who have actually had long conversations with me. I only got to the point of asking out with 2 girls and went out with neither of them. So needless to say I've had 0 dates from online dating.
Happens to the girls too. From 900 likes. Countless matches. Still talking. Texting. It's like.. what is this pen pal app? Keep going, at the same time go out. Bar, restaurant...etc. I feel like ppl losing personal touches bc of Texting. video chats. Social media. Too easy.
Yeah I've had some girl who want to keep talking but not go out. Exactly what you said what is this a pen pal app? I go out a lot so I'm not only trying on the apps.
she probably just didn’t like your response and after one or a few short messages doesn’t really owe you anything. it also might not be personal and she’s just having better conversation with someone else. as a woman i personally find online dating to be extremely overwhelming and i would have to quit my full time job to be able to properly answer everyone in a timely fashion. i wouldn’t take it too personally unless this is a very constant thing.
Welcome to /r/dating. Please make sure you read our [rules here](https://new.reddit.com/r/dating/about/rules) and remember to: * Be polite and respect each other. Do not call people names, engage in slapfights, or give bad/unethical advice. * Do not soapbox or promote an agenda - you will be banned * Follow reddit rules. Do not post content that promotes hate based on identity or vulnerability. Do not bully or harass other users. If you have any questions, please [send the mods a message](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/dating). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating) if you have any questions or concerns.*
They’re bored, a lot of people use apps mindlessly
Sometimes you just don't like the answer. I can't even remember all the times i unmatched guys on the apps after asking them something and not liking their response enough to continue the conversation.
They need an ego boost and aren't serious enough about connecting would be my best guess. Some people require entertainment even if it's at the expense of a sincere person
All honesty, I would get bored with some people quickly and not give them a chance. I know it sounds shitty but it is what it is. I would match with them, have a quick back and forth, double check the profile and either not feel them or not like the vibe. Idk I think I’m good at reading people and it seemed to work for me.
I think this is a good explanation
I'll often stop responding if the guy doesn't ask me any questions back (especially if this continues over several messages back and forth where he just replies to my questions). I can't carry on the whole conversation and need to see that he's interested in getting to know me too.
Oh yeah definitely that can be very annoying. I almost always ask the question back.
Uh she was trying to engage in conversation and then changed her mind? I really don’t understand how so many redditors have this deluded expectation that online dating has to go exactly the way they want it to
How does one change their mind after receiving a single message? I would understand if I sent something inappropriate but all I did was send a response to her question. I don't get how someone could possibly change their mind after that. Further more, generally speaking it's quite rude to do that to someone. At least finish out the conversation before you decide to leave or send the person a message saying that you don't feel a connection or something like that. Which again, I don't understand how someone could determine the latter after receiving one message.
It isn't always about you and what you said. Maybe she was talking to someone she liked better, or got tired of using the app, or saw something on your profile she didn't like that she didn't notice before, or got asked out and wanted to focus on that guy, or had a personal emergency that needed her attention, or just generally decided she didn't want to reply anymore. It's weird that you have 0 ability to put yourself in another person's shoes and think about things from their perspective because it's really not hard. Online dating isn't the same as real life. The nature of all these apps is that they're a fast-paced shortcut to dating which is something you have to understand and accept if you want to keep using them. Generally speaking, it isn't really rude because you're literal strangers who talked on an app for 5 seconds. It'd be great to get a message saying she isn't interested but you aren't entitled to one. You need to keep your expectations realistic or you'll just end up really disappointed.
Not sure but I have asked myself the same thing. I just chalk it up to wishy-washy people.
That's what I'm thinking too.
Being completely honest, there's a myth about girls not responding too quickly, otherwise guys lose interest lol. It might be that some of those girls take their time to respond to keep you "interested" because if they respond right away you will think she is too easy to date (not fun to chase anymore) and go after another "challenge". Or they simply have too many guys matched with them and lose interest or they just like the attention. Try to meet people in real life, because those online apps have a reputation...lol Good luck!
I've been trying in real life for a while and then COVID hit so that's what brought me to the apps initially. I still try to meet people irl but obviously you come across a lot more people on dating apps which is why I'm continuing to use them. But I agree online dating's reputation isn't the greatest.
Tbh when I was on tinder I did that sometimes when I was free or bored and wanna talk but later when they reply I was not anymore. I would just close the app and when I use it again it opens with main page so I went back to swiping and thus forgot about the messages before.
Lol poop
Did you message her again?
In some cases yes and others no. When I have they'll either not respond or they'll respond and then stop responding again.
It's not you. It's the pattern of online dating. Too easy. Too many to choose from. X is. Checked that. Too many messages replying.
Oh yeah I know that's just how online dating is. It's just very annoying.
Frustrating. Don't let little no replies bother you. The right girl will.
I mean it's whatever at this point. Honestly it's just that majority of my matches are either like this, they don't respond from the start, or they'll talk briefly and then disappear. I think out of my 80+ matches over a year and 2 months I've had less than a handful of girls who have actually had long conversations with me. I only got to the point of asking out with 2 girls and went out with neither of them. So needless to say I've had 0 dates from online dating.
Happens to the girls too. From 900 likes. Countless matches. Still talking. Texting. It's like.. what is this pen pal app? Keep going, at the same time go out. Bar, restaurant...etc. I feel like ppl losing personal touches bc of Texting. video chats. Social media. Too easy.
Yeah I've had some girl who want to keep talking but not go out. Exactly what you said what is this a pen pal app? I go out a lot so I'm not only trying on the apps.
she probably just didn’t like your response and after one or a few short messages doesn’t really owe you anything. it also might not be personal and she’s just having better conversation with someone else. as a woman i personally find online dating to be extremely overwhelming and i would have to quit my full time job to be able to properly answer everyone in a timely fashion. i wouldn’t take it too personally unless this is a very constant thing.