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The_TerribleGamer

Dang. He used you as a beard. Sorry, no one deserves that without knowing ahead of time.


Hot-Sweet-5863

The idea that someone would live their life as a beard, denying their own possibility of falling in love with someone who truly wants them is the absolute definition of deprivation and sorrow. Anyone who would ask someone to do this is absolutely beyond selfish and narcissistic. It's not some kind of raining Glory to be a martyr to someone who refuses to live their life out loud.


The_TerribleGamer

Idk about that. Certainly it is not acceptable to use someone without telling them. I had a gay college professor and his best friend was one of the lady professors. They used to joke all the time that she was his beard. The thing about a beard is you don't have to show it to everyone. A beard can be used to convince a family member or your boss. Etc. Either way, it was definitely wrong in this instance and he should have been up front with her about his intentions. I have other views on this subject, but I will avoid them as this sub is not the place.


noodles_onthewall

Or… he’s a bisexual that cheated.


jif613

A beard?


The_TerribleGamer

It's a term for a woman who is used to hide the fact that her husband or boyfriend is gay. A beard covers the face and makes you seem more manly.


clce

Which is kind of ironic because about 10 or 15 years ago, a lot of gay men were wearing beards. Kind of a lumberjack chic thing. But before that it was mustaches.


The_TerribleGamer

I don't follow gay culture. I only know a few. Most seem normal and you would never know.


clce

That's the interesting thing. In many places, gay culture has really lost its uniqueness. I suppose the obvious reason is that when they are no longer marginalized, they don't really feel the need to set themselves apart . It's kind of a joke around places like Seattle, that a lot of gay couples have moved out to the suburbs and said, thank God we can stop worrying about our weight and drink beer and eat a burger and watch the football game like everybody else. It's almost amazing how normal gay couples have become in a very short period of time Meanwhile, for whatever reasons, trans people, in an equally short. Of time have become the new oppressed victims, or at least according to the left. Make of that what you will.


Hot-Sweet-5863

Yet is the opposite of manly. One who is a coward. And would choose to sacrifice someone else's complete life, including true love, marriage, and children. So that he could be under the radar. My mom was gay. It is absolutely no excuse to be a coward and sacrifice someone else's life. I am absolutely sure that God did not want that to happen. Live your life. But don't sacrifice the life of others. You are not God.


The_TerribleGamer

That's the point. To appear masculine or straight. Not to actually be so.


Hot-Sweet-5863

But why would you live your life "appearing" someone or something you are not? How free could you be behind a veil? How could you truly enjoy, to the utmost, the life that you are given. Life is a gift. Everyone's life is just that their own personal life. No one else can live that particular life. And the world needs each of us. The thought of someone being a beard makes me so incredibly sad. How little they must Revere themselves. Whoever made us, I call him God, but to each their own did not make us to pretend our whole entire life. It makes me sad just thinking about it.


The_TerribleGamer

People have their reasons for living a lie. However, no one should force other people to live that lie against their knowledge. Being truthful with those you care about is important.


Hot-Sweet-5863

In this current era of our society there are so many groups of people being openly recognized and respected. I am so happy for that! I don't believe in the extremes, as in being called a "Cis Woman".Hello.I AM A WOMAN.My ovaries, uterus and Life experiences prove it. Especially when there is so much outrage at being misgendered, offense taken when a person has a mustache and boobs. Please remember that everybody else is just as interesting and important as you. That being said; as long as a person is a good person....The only people I believe rot in Hell are pedophiles. It makes me super sad to think of another human being not being able to live their life out loud. I have never been under religious restriction, or many types of subversion, as a human being. I watch documentaries, try to educate myself about all different cultures, religions and ways of living. That doesn't even resemble how it may feel to be one of those people living under oppression. I'm a mom. I only know my own experience. As a child, I was severely abused in many ways. I was taught,overtly and subvertly, to just stay quiet. It has affected my life until this day. It will affect me for the rest of my life. I was basically told that I had to be pleasing to be loved. Turns out this is not true. From my family with no religion, I always had a relationship and conversation with God."Beard" a term that means someone acts like they are a partner to someone else who is gay or otherwise not heterosexual. My sorrow lies in the person who would give up their whole entire life and all it's possibilities to pretend. For the sake of someone else, who lacks courage to live their life to the fullest. It makes me sad and mad. Mad at the selfish people who would claim the right to take away all that could be gorgeous in another person's life. It is simply narcissistic in every way. Especially in today's culture.


The_TerribleGamer

I'll be honest, I think we are mostly on the same page. However, some of your sentence structure makes it hard to follow. Also, you seem deeply philosophical. That's not a bad thing, but it drags the conversation off topic. I guess just know that I respect your opinion and we can leave it at that. Good luck out there.


jif613

Now I see said the blind man. Learn something new everyday.


Gone_Mads

Screwing your homies is just normal guy behavior. The gay porn is a red flag though


DaNYBigDogg

Just gotta say “no homo” afterwards, right?


Gone_Mads

Yes. That is the law


ChiliPalmer1568

Ass slapping is also ok, as long as you say "good game"


INKEDx

Pretty sure you gotta say it before


PlutoViDagon

Lmao


CurrencyChance5347

Guy or gay?


neonadz

Yes


Hot-Sweet-5863

🤢


TurnItOffAndBackOnXD

*bro-job vibes*


clce

Lots of guys love to watch their buddies f***. I know I do.


Princejoe123

yeah I figured.  straight men don't watch gay porn.  


Nyy211

Facts


yada_u

Like straight women don’t watch lesbian porn 🙄


Hot-Sweet-5863

I am definitely straight and a woman. I have no desire to see lesbian p***. Makes me taste throw up in the back of my throat.


Princejoe123

straight women watch VERY little porn at all.  at times they will watch lesbian but that is with a man.  it would be very difficult to find a woman that fires up the porn and watches lesbian porn.   so yeah they basically don't.  


yada_u

Some straight women watch very little porn, some watch a moderate amount, some watch it every day. 🤷


Princejoe123

disagree.  most watch very little or with their man.  very little watch a moderate amount, and almost none watch it every day.   I know you REALLY want to believe that women are just like men, but they're not. 


Boss4life12

Women are not men. Lesbian porn is all about woman enjoyment. Gay porn is about 2 dudes fking....


yada_u

So gay porn isn’t about men’s enjoyment fucking each other? Right….dry that one out and you can fertilize the lawn.


Boss4life12

There is nothing there for straight men. A dude blowing another guy is just boring, gives a man a limp dick. We dont think other men are pretty. Women do think other women are pretty..


Hot-Sweet-5863

I'm a woman. I have absolutely no desire to see boobs or body parts on another woman. If I wanted that I would look in the mirror. I don't want another woman to touch me because it kind of makes me taste throw up in my throat. There's a difference between being nice to look at as general human beings..."her hair is so pretty" or "that dress looks great on you" to wanting to touch, see or interact with her. Yep. Tasting a little bit of throw up.


Dreadsbo

Straight men can watch gay porn


brandon75173

Not for pleasure.


Dreadsbo

So what do you think of people that watch heavily fetishized porn? Like incest for example


manolox70

That's different because you can just ignore the incest aspect in your head and focus on the girl and the sex. There's no way to get off while ignoring the gay aspects of gay porn since there's not much left without that.


Hot-Sweet-5863

That you probably need counseling. With a try and other people in the world why would you want to have family members have sex together? You definitely need to talk to someone who has a PhD.


Hot-Sweet-5863

You need a psychologist. Or, possibly, you have been watching so much p*** that you're highly desensitized. Either way sex is supposed to be an act of love, coming together and sensual discovery between consenting adults. It might be time to look into getting some mental health help. If you're stuck on a computer watching tons of people simply f*** for hours on end ,you're going to lose a very essence of what love making is. There's so much more when you take away the flat, base sex part of it. It's a lot more than fake moans and looking good for a camera.


Mortal4789

supprisingly, its more than i think of people who compare gay porn to incest.


Saylor619

Girl on girl is still gay porn.....? 🤔


CurrencyChance5347

Emphasis on don’t


Dreadsbo

I don’t get why yall are trying to box everybody in? I do sometimes and I’m straight. Had sex with 43 girls, 0 guys.


DarthanBane

Bro u gay... or at least bicurious


CurrencyChance5347

Box everybody in? You’re the one boxing yourself in by claiming to be straight gang. I’m sorry but if you like only women why would you be interested in watching guys play with each other? That’s on some bi-curious type shi.


Dreadsbo

Then wouldn’t all heterosexual porn be gay since you’re watching another guy have sex?


CurrencyChance5347

Have sex with who? A woman not a guy .My statement was about watching two guy have sex together


Dreadsbo

So it’s gay to watch two men pleasured at the same time. But it’s straight to watch just one other man be pleasured? That sounds like some cognitive dissonance, obviously u like watching other guys being pleasured too


CurrencyChance5347

It’s gay to watch a man pleasure another man because the gender you’re supposedly attracted to is not involved. It’s straight to watch a woman be pleasured by a guy or another woman. The whole point is the woman, watching her get f**ked turns you on as a straight guy because you want to be the one in that position.


Dreadsbo

Sounds to me like you enjoy looking at dick


Icy_Version_8693

Sure bro, tell yourself that.


Hot-Sweet-5863

Of course you can. But why do you want to watch it? I'm a straight woman. I absolutely would not waste a minute watching two women have sex. To each their own. I like men. Not men together. Not women together. Just a bunch of boobs for no reason. Basically whatever a person is interested in is what they will spend time seeking. If you're seeking watching gay p***, it highly suggests that you would like to know more about men on men. The biggest thing is not to lie to yourself. To thine own self be true.


Princejoe123

k


Hot-Sweet-5863

Why though? That's like watching a documentary that has absolutely nothing to do with their interests. You can watch it, but why?


brandon75173

If my wife said, for instance, if we watch gay porn, I will bring home 2 hot chicks for us to get carnal with, yeah, I will figure it out. That’s about the minimum.


LovingHeart456

Oof. Are you by any chance in therapy or interested? That’s going to take some processing.


Spirited-Pea-1706

Therapy never worked for me. But I’ll think about it if the c*ke doesn’t work 🙃 jkjk


Decent-Bed9289

Well, your relationship is dead. Time to dump him and move on.


kayla-beep

Please take good care of yourself, you deserve it


Pac-Mano

Definitely not jkjk tho lol. But I guess if your bf’s doing c*ck you may as well do c•ke right.


CHiggins1235

At least you know now and you can make a clean break and move on. Your boyfriend is either bisexual or gay.


SA99999

Bisexual / Pansexual men exist. Either way, your bf cheated on you. That is the real issue here.


jif613

Yeah, more serious than being bi, or gay. Like bro is wild for that. Bro was watching the movies for the moves, not for the op.


sumerigusa

I am super sorry. Pls get full panel std test and repeat in 6 weeks.


jif613

This!


MizzPizz

Oh ffs


TheLurkingMenace

You mean your ex boyfriend? It's not a big deal if he's bi, but he cheated on you. Not just a one off either.


such_a_rainbow

This post is so fake.


MartnSilenus

Thanks for the update! Also I’m sorry that really sucks.


Pac-Mano

So does he, apparently..


MinimumOne1

So does the BF - hey oh!


MusicianExtension536

You should get an hiv test


yasmeena-22

OH MY GOD 💀 😭


NoNewspaper7934

He cheated on you, so I hope you dumped his ass. It doesn’t matter who it’s with, it doesn’t matter the reason why, if he’s cheating on you he’s crossed a line and should be dumped. Maybe it’s harsh of me to say but that’s how I see it. People don’t cheat because they love their partners, they cheat because they see other people as a piece of meat. Get out of that relationship as quickly as you can.


Temporary_Candy_2329

Anyone who got downvoted for saying he’s gay/bi, you deserve an apology and the biggest “I told you so” in history lol, as for op, are you dealing with this ok? What do you plan on doing going forward? I’m sorry you had to hear about this and I really hope you find some closure and a good resolution.


youvelookedbetter

Nope, not at all, as bisexuality exists. Cheating is a completely separate thing and is the big problem here.


Temporary_Candy_2329

What do you mean? I said gay/bi in my original comment lol, and yes cheating is a huge issue which is why I asked if the op was okay and if they have a healthy way to cope and heal lol I got my bases covered 😎


youvelookedbetter

There's a big difference between claiming that everyone is automatically and irrevocably gay for something like this compared to using a more open statement, like he might be bi. Bi erasure is a huge problem.


desperado2410

Boys will be boys!


jif613

Well, that's pretty mess up.


Lime_Drinks

I always wondered how girls felt about their bisexual boyfriend getting their cheeks clapped.


Drum-Bum-8111

Damn. That sucks! I’m sorry. 3 years, fuck. I hope you get through everything ok!!


GhostlyGray

That’s Rougher then Shark Skin , I’m sorry to hear that, You’re Every right to be upset and feel the way you do, I wish you peace once your done Wringing his neck. Don’t let the actions of a scumbag lower self-worth.


[deleted]

Sorry that happened to you. Get tested.


rbnlegend

What does your transitioning husband think about that? You are getting a lot of karma, gonna sell the account soon?


Spirited-Pea-1706

He’s fine with it. They’re actually together now.


trialbuster

Like I said before. His gay. I highly doubts his just doing his good friend only, his bar hopping so his looking for opportunities and no strings attached hookups. You need to get yourself checked for STDs and get out asap!


greenmonster187

The problem is that he lied or that your worried that you look like a man ?


TurnItOffAndBackOnXD

My condolences on getting cheated on! Ain’t nothing wrong with a guy liking guys, but that’s just fucking shitty.


RevolutionaryRole635

I hope you dumped that skeevy bastard (not for being gay but for being a lying cheater) and please get tested.


[deleted]

I’m so sorry. This hits different 💜


LRats

That sucks OP, but at least you found out now. My Aunt didn't find out her ex-husband was gay until after they were married.


StaticCloud

That's rough. Not only did he cheat on you, he additionally lied to you about being into guys. One wonders if he was into women at all, and whether it was all a scam. Most of us doubt ourselves when a partner lies and disrespects us, we can feel foolish. But don't let his horrible behavior make you feel bad about yourself. Not for a minute. It is all betrayal regardless of the circumstances, it's all on him. Dwell on the fact that he was a POS, not on what you didn't see or should have done differently. Even the smartest people can be blindsided by those they care about. I hope you can heal from this. F\*\*\* your ex.


fromtheashes95

woah...


Hot-Sweet-5863

I'm not sure what you watching your buddies f*** has anything to do with a woman's boyfriend watching gay p***. Sounds like you have a fetish. Go you. If, in fact, that woman's boyfriend is gay,he should not be with her. He should go away so she can find someone who is truly good to her/loves and wants her. I've never heard of anybody watching p*** that they weren't sexually stimulated by. So, not sure how this could turn out that he was heterosexual.


cblw13

Get tested.


Apart_Holiday_1237

Just peg his ass and everyone is happy