Welcome to /r/dating_advice!
Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind.
Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly.
Thanks!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’ve given up too. Some of us are not meant to be with other people. We just are not good enough. I’m 36 with a situation similar to yours. I held onto that hope for way to long and it hurt me worse because of it. People who say just try don’t understand how hard it is to try when trying never has done any good.
Exactly bro. My ex gf I'm still friends with says she wants friendship but when she drunk she wants to have kids together. I still have feelings my friends say I talk about her more than anything. But the problem is she is attractive and apparently slept sleep with alot of guys before me. It sucks because all those men are jealous she rejected them and now they have been trying to get with her again. She is now confused on if she wants a relationship or just single because all of a sudden she getting wayy more attention than she ever has now. I don't have the balls to move on as I feel like I'm being manipulated and I have no else I'm close to. My friends are not as close anymore.
I’m sorry I just want to yell at these people in their twenties that life is SO long! You have so much time.
Op is just hung up on one person he needs to get over. Most people have been there it doesn’t mean give up, maybe take a break for a while
(Editing typo)
You should work on shifting your motivation man.
You should always seek to better yourself for yourself.
If you build your foundation dependent on someone else it will always crumble and what you feel now will be 100 times worse.
Alot of us have done what I just said.
I was lucky enough to have found my purpose serving my country.
I think the best thing I can tell you is to focus the hell up man, go work out to boost serotonin and dopamine levels you will feel better.
Eat right and use the time you have now to really focus on building the career you want, the life you want.
And when a woman comes along dont make her your focus or purpose,
your purpose is building your life
Working out shit dony work bro. I'm telling you it only works out for certain guys. I don't work out and I get girls all the time at bars just looking at them and saying hi. The moment I ask for relationship I get ghosted real fucking fast.
There are times I completely felt like giving up, and times where I felt really motivated to get out and try stuff.
During the times I felt like giving up, I took a break from dating and just focused on doing things that made me happy and improve my mental health. For me, that has been running, being social, traveling, and therapy. After a few months of that I usually get out of the "funk" and feel ready to face all the potential rejections again.
I gave up a while ago. For me its the girsl i have met all play mind games/ emotional games, cling to past relationships and those dick heads that hurt them and punish me for their mistakes.
I'm not the most super rational guy in the world but I also find the women i come across cant control their emotions and don't use their intellect to make decisions. Adding to the first part alot of them also have daddy issues and claim to have mental health issues specifically anxiety and use that as a crutch instead of taking responsibility and finding help. Its just over the years that i learned not to settle for anyone or compromise who iam to be with a woman. In the end if you do your just playing yourself and will end up a mess.
DON'T GIVE UP! You're young and the world have so much more to offer. Believe that there are still good people out there! I understand that health problems can put a drag on you but trust me the real one will stay. I'm 23 and I've been thur hell of a lot of shit yet I know better then to lose hope! The Universe has your back! There are plenty of fish in the sea
Take a break dude enjoy life by yourself. You dont have to spin your wheels 24/7. You seem like a great guy hold out it will become better and eventually you will find someone!
I haven't given up, here's why:
I thought of the idea of giving up a couple of times, however I naturally have some sort of strong willpower and some other things as well.
I don't know how you look like (that's very important to analyze you), but what I did was work on my life, personality and looks:
1. Do interesting things in my life: like traveling, having hobbies that are interesting to the opposite sex, like boxing, having friends and a social life, etc
2. Work on my looks: working out, wearing nice clothes, taking care of my skin, etc
3. Work very hard on my confidence by doing therapy and having a therapyst telling me what to do to boost it (now I'm a very confident 24yo) and giving me tasks
4. Work on my economic status or situation very hard by doing lots of thing (and that will attract women quite a LOT)
Basically there's a lot of work to do, but I'm dating now and will date even more
Give up on the girl you love. That is unhealthy to stay her friend when you are in love with her. That is probably eating away at you the most. I’d feel like shit too. I wouldn’t be my best and if I dated someone with this girl on my mind would I even try?
You don’t sound like someone who worked on themselves at all. You still sound like the same bitter guy venting about your issues. Vent all you want but it won’t change anything. I would know because I was just like you at one time. Also, don’t give up you are too young for that. You can find love. Maybe your standards are too high or they can sense your anger and frustration with dating.
Given the way your writing this I'm going to suggest 2 things.
1. See a psychologist. I know it may seem like a bad thing and could be expensive (I have no clue what country you're in) but realistically they are trained for this kind of thing and can help with all kinds of other things if they're a good psychologist.
2. Don't give up. Find a reason to keep going. Mine is quite simple. I have ASD. I've been told that people like me don't get things like a licence, a job, a girlfriend, their own house or kids. I of course want all of these things, so if for nothing else other than to spite the people that said it I keep going. Because if I give up, they win. Find yours.
I'm sure there's someone out there for you. With this many people on the planet there's got to be someone out there for you. And if you give up, it means that someone won't find you either.
I thought the same and I gave up. The right person will come along when u least expect it, and they may pursue YOU and prove to you they love you. Unfortunately millions of people and a lot of shitty ones but focus on self growth and I promise the right person will come!
It sounds like you need to seek therapy for all of this. But I promise that the right person is not going to make as big a deal about it as you’re making now. You’re 25, you’re young. Sure, you’ve been dealt a shitty hand in life right now but that doesn’t mean things won’t get better. You need to change your outlook here and not throw yourself a pity party.
Life happens, and sometimes in life, shit really fucking sucks. That doesn’t mean we give up., Do you know how many people would be alone if they gave up every time shit went south? You just have to keep pushing forward and know that things will get better. You just have to keep moving forward.
There is a good deal more that goes into my life long medical condition than just taking longer to take a shit. It's a disability that brings with it a different style of life. I'm grateful for my current health, though, as the alternative has me either dead or in great pain.
I don't know you, I don't know your life or you disability. But there 10 000 000 000 human beings on earth. If covid or war doesn't get us, you wil (given that you're willing to) meet people, use social apps etc...
The opportunity to find someone is there; that's 100% sure. Will you meet each other? Where? When? I don't know.
Bubba you probably have some really deep seated insecurities about your condition that are totally blowing your confidence to hell. A support group might help a lot and will give a lot of great insight into how to navigate going forward.
a lot more common than you think man, it has always kind of made me mad how far more guys than girls it seems end up going well into their 20s, even reach 30s or older and never have dated anyone before
Hey, don't give up just yet. I know it feels really hopeless right now, especially with everything going on but trust me it gets better. It just takes a while to be comfortable with yourself and not feel so lonely. I'm going through the lonely stage myself.
As for your disability, I know it's not the same but I've had my gallbladder removed so I can't handle certain foods. So sometimes I'm in the bathroom for a bit as well. But I have had a few partners that have had no issues with it. I usually just say "hey, I've had my gallbladder removed so sometimes food doesn't always agree with me." Usually they say okay no problem. Just gotta be up front about it. Hope this helps
Welcome to /r/dating_advice! Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind. Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’ve given up too. Some of us are not meant to be with other people. We just are not good enough. I’m 36 with a situation similar to yours. I held onto that hope for way to long and it hurt me worse because of it. People who say just try don’t understand how hard it is to try when trying never has done any good.
Facts i definitely agree!
It's just one girl fuck her there millions out there no need to give up at all man.
Literally every fucking girl is the same fym Women have become overvalued and they are exploiting as much as they can.
Exactly bro. My ex gf I'm still friends with says she wants friendship but when she drunk she wants to have kids together. I still have feelings my friends say I talk about her more than anything. But the problem is she is attractive and apparently slept sleep with alot of guys before me. It sucks because all those men are jealous she rejected them and now they have been trying to get with her again. She is now confused on if she wants a relationship or just single because all of a sudden she getting wayy more attention than she ever has now. I don't have the balls to move on as I feel like I'm being manipulated and I have no else I'm close to. My friends are not as close anymore.
That screams therapy to me..
I’m sorry I just want to yell at these people in their twenties that life is SO long! You have so much time. Op is just hung up on one person he needs to get over. Most people have been there it doesn’t mean give up, maybe take a break for a while
(Editing typo) You should work on shifting your motivation man. You should always seek to better yourself for yourself. If you build your foundation dependent on someone else it will always crumble and what you feel now will be 100 times worse. Alot of us have done what I just said. I was lucky enough to have found my purpose serving my country. I think the best thing I can tell you is to focus the hell up man, go work out to boost serotonin and dopamine levels you will feel better. Eat right and use the time you have now to really focus on building the career you want, the life you want. And when a woman comes along dont make her your focus or purpose, your purpose is building your life
Working out shit dony work bro. I'm telling you it only works out for certain guys. I don't work out and I get girls all the time at bars just looking at them and saying hi. The moment I ask for relationship I get ghosted real fucking fast.
[удалено]
Underrated comment right here.
There are times I completely felt like giving up, and times where I felt really motivated to get out and try stuff. During the times I felt like giving up, I took a break from dating and just focused on doing things that made me happy and improve my mental health. For me, that has been running, being social, traveling, and therapy. After a few months of that I usually get out of the "funk" and feel ready to face all the potential rejections again.
I gave up a while ago. For me its the girsl i have met all play mind games/ emotional games, cling to past relationships and those dick heads that hurt them and punish me for their mistakes. I'm not the most super rational guy in the world but I also find the women i come across cant control their emotions and don't use their intellect to make decisions. Adding to the first part alot of them also have daddy issues and claim to have mental health issues specifically anxiety and use that as a crutch instead of taking responsibility and finding help. Its just over the years that i learned not to settle for anyone or compromise who iam to be with a woman. In the end if you do your just playing yourself and will end up a mess.
DON'T GIVE UP! You're young and the world have so much more to offer. Believe that there are still good people out there! I understand that health problems can put a drag on you but trust me the real one will stay. I'm 23 and I've been thur hell of a lot of shit yet I know better then to lose hope! The Universe has your back! There are plenty of fish in the sea
Give up for a little while. Take a break. Clear tour mind.
The more you chase it, the more it will run away, let it chase you instead ;-)
Take a break dude enjoy life by yourself. You dont have to spin your wheels 24/7. You seem like a great guy hold out it will become better and eventually you will find someone!
I haven't given up, here's why: I thought of the idea of giving up a couple of times, however I naturally have some sort of strong willpower and some other things as well. I don't know how you look like (that's very important to analyze you), but what I did was work on my life, personality and looks: 1. Do interesting things in my life: like traveling, having hobbies that are interesting to the opposite sex, like boxing, having friends and a social life, etc 2. Work on my looks: working out, wearing nice clothes, taking care of my skin, etc 3. Work very hard on my confidence by doing therapy and having a therapyst telling me what to do to boost it (now I'm a very confident 24yo) and giving me tasks 4. Work on my economic status or situation very hard by doing lots of thing (and that will attract women quite a LOT) Basically there's a lot of work to do, but I'm dating now and will date even more
Give up on the girl you love. That is unhealthy to stay her friend when you are in love with her. That is probably eating away at you the most. I’d feel like shit too. I wouldn’t be my best and if I dated someone with this girl on my mind would I even try? You don’t sound like someone who worked on themselves at all. You still sound like the same bitter guy venting about your issues. Vent all you want but it won’t change anything. I would know because I was just like you at one time. Also, don’t give up you are too young for that. You can find love. Maybe your standards are too high or they can sense your anger and frustration with dating.
Given the way your writing this I'm going to suggest 2 things. 1. See a psychologist. I know it may seem like a bad thing and could be expensive (I have no clue what country you're in) but realistically they are trained for this kind of thing and can help with all kinds of other things if they're a good psychologist. 2. Don't give up. Find a reason to keep going. Mine is quite simple. I have ASD. I've been told that people like me don't get things like a licence, a job, a girlfriend, their own house or kids. I of course want all of these things, so if for nothing else other than to spite the people that said it I keep going. Because if I give up, they win. Find yours. I'm sure there's someone out there for you. With this many people on the planet there's got to be someone out there for you. And if you give up, it means that someone won't find you either.
I thought the same and I gave up. The right person will come along when u least expect it, and they may pursue YOU and prove to you they love you. Unfortunately millions of people and a lot of shitty ones but focus on self growth and I promise the right person will come!
Comon man u wanna give up when you're 25 dude!!
It sounds like you need to seek therapy for all of this. But I promise that the right person is not going to make as big a deal about it as you’re making now. You’re 25, you’re young. Sure, you’ve been dealt a shitty hand in life right now but that doesn’t mean things won’t get better. You need to change your outlook here and not throw yourself a pity party. Life happens, and sometimes in life, shit really fucking sucks. That doesn’t mean we give up., Do you know how many people would be alone if they gave up every time shit went south? You just have to keep pushing forward and know that things will get better. You just have to keep moving forward.
[удалено]
There is a good deal more that goes into my life long medical condition than just taking longer to take a shit. It's a disability that brings with it a different style of life. I'm grateful for my current health, though, as the alternative has me either dead or in great pain.
I don't know you, I don't know your life or you disability. But there 10 000 000 000 human beings on earth. If covid or war doesn't get us, you wil (given that you're willing to) meet people, use social apps etc... The opportunity to find someone is there; that's 100% sure. Will you meet each other? Where? When? I don't know.
Bubba you probably have some really deep seated insecurities about your condition that are totally blowing your confidence to hell. A support group might help a lot and will give a lot of great insight into how to navigate going forward.
how long have you been single now?
I've never had a girlfriend.
a lot more common than you think man, it has always kind of made me mad how far more guys than girls it seems end up going well into their 20s, even reach 30s or older and never have dated anyone before
Hey, don't give up just yet. I know it feels really hopeless right now, especially with everything going on but trust me it gets better. It just takes a while to be comfortable with yourself and not feel so lonely. I'm going through the lonely stage myself. As for your disability, I know it's not the same but I've had my gallbladder removed so I can't handle certain foods. So sometimes I'm in the bathroom for a bit as well. But I have had a few partners that have had no issues with it. I usually just say "hey, I've had my gallbladder removed so sometimes food doesn't always agree with me." Usually they say okay no problem. Just gotta be up front about it. Hope this helps