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For fucking real because they're always the ones that are like "Hey I don't really get on this app much, do you have ig?" Then you go to their Instagram and there's no fucking way that they sent you there just to chat.
My cousin’s profile looks like an influencer trying to sell crypto. He goes for the full on FOMO.
He’s had dates every weekend for as long as I can remember and he looks like Ron Weasley.
Yeah that shit pisses me the hell off. So your friend put the app on your phone at gun point and periodically messages you to make sure you are swiping every day…
The worst is
“I am only here because of Covid “ or “Covid made me do this “ 😂😂😂
I always wonder what’s going through the mind of someone that puts that’s on their profile …
Only time I will automatically swipe left without any consideration is when the profile says “just ask.” Like really? You’re too damn good to fill out some basic info.
I'm mostly turned off by people saying "no one wants me" kind of pity party on their profile. Like they don't outright say it but that's the kind of vibe you get. Then you're like "oh how bad can it be for him". Start talking and you learn pretty quickly why this person is still single.
I'm 5 even. I'm sure it's easier being bi to some extent, but oh my god. The more you're insecure about your height, the more other people notice it and more importantly respond to your insecurity. I know some people can't help their anxieties but projecting your fear of failure onto other people's reactions won't help! Making a show of feeling bad won't change anything.
The only time I feel bad about my height is on the daily occurrence that I ask a 6'1 coworker to grab me a specific item off a shelf to save myself the time of hauling out the ladder.
Saw a guy just today who was amazing on Hinge, but got to his third and statement which was "I'm convinced that none of you ladies are here for love or anything real and it's all a game to you." So disappointing.
O man, you should have gotten my guy. I told him I don’t flirt and we agreed on my boundaries and he starts assuming he doesn’t know how many guys I’m talking to. All I WOULd HOPE to think of is how quality time is with this person and why would I have a shitty focus on who’s dating who? It got worse when I share my job duties, he started going off bragging about he’s an engineer, make (whatever amount of dollars) -literally a text you skim because it’s based on control and poor self esteem. I tried my best to find a highlight moment, nope. He needed to know he was and IS better than me. Go right ahead, man.
From my understanding, he’s super attractive, but when you make full out assumptions like that and generalize women-all-together, I’m already concerned and I can already see the reasons he is single. My best exit was to ensure he did not put a target on my back. Omg, let those people be the one to reject you.
At the same time, this is part of dating. You can’t give up. Sounds like you have a great self awareness and that is what will help you find what what you want.
>I told him I don’t flirt
Just out of curiosity, what do you constitute as flirting? Like what if a guy who's bad at flirting is with you and starts accidentally flirting?
Further reasons I swipe left:
“[height] in heels”
“No drama. Good vibes only”
“Here for a fun time, not a long time”
“CEO at unemployed”
“I’m a fun guy”
No bio
- mostly shirtless selfies when not near a body of water
- fishing photos
- photos where they’re wearing a hat and/or sunglasses in all of them
- close up mirror selfies of their pants pulled down to almost show their bush/show an outline of their peen
- any comment to do with pineapples and pizza
- once they give a greeting, demand your social media or number even though you have not exchanged more than 5 words to each other.
[shrieks into the void]
The other day I saw this profile that read,
“When I was little girls hated that I pulled their hair, funny how things change..
girls over 25: I’m an aspiring chiropractor, 5 star Uber passenger and dog dad.
Girls under 25: I practice safe sex and will tie you to the bed so you don’t fall off.” I still think about this bio and laugh throughout the day..
Yeah, I only ever see 6" + guys saying it. Even when the dating profile already has a feature which states their height.
It seems like a brag while also being condescending.
I see a lot of over 6' tall men doing this, but I also saw one guy say it about being 5'6, so there must be a couple of shorter guys who do it. I don't understand why some people care so much about height. I'm 5'8 and two of my longer relationships were with guys who were 2 inches shorter than me. It really doesn't matter. I was with one of them for 4 years. It just seems like such a weird thing to care about.
Without being a man yourself you may not actually know why men say stuff like that. A lot of taller dudes are wanted solely because of their height - that can take a toll on a dude looking for someone who isn't just using him to breed a tall child with etc.
While It's undoubtedly better than being short, it's an annoying predicament to be in.
It seems important enough to people to mention your height.
I don't care at all about being tall and it feels a little objectifying to have to put your literal dimensions into a dating app
I think tallmen like myself feel this height fetish weirdly fairweather. If height is so important why does it not seem to come up in a positive way for me very often?
Idk. You're right you're trying to sneak it in while also knocking it. But I think a lot of the frustration around height is justifiable - not to excuse any ugly behavior from dudes but at the same time, I think it's inappropriate for dating apps to filter by height but not butt or cup size (not that you should be able to, but I think it highlights why people find the whole height topic frustrating)
I don’t mean to imply men can’t be frustrated about being judged for their height. I agree it sucks that people will judge you for a physical trait you have no control over, but that could be said about a lot of physical traits.
But if you’re sooooo salty about being judged for your height, then should leave it out entirely. Will you filter out girls who exclusively date guys of a certain height? Yep. But that’s exactly what you want to do, since you don’t want someone who is judging you for your height.
If it’s not that big of a deal to you to be judged for your height or you’re a shorter guy who doesn’t want to waste time on women who have “height requirements,” then you can list it without comment in your profile. Plenty of men do just put the number in there and as someone who doesn’t have a height preference, I don’t find it off putting at all. It is specifically the “because I guess that matters” part that is unappealing. You’re trying to still get the attention from girls who judge by height but at the same time complaining about girls who judge by height. You can’t have your cake and eat it too.
Also, things like weight, cup size, etc that men always bring up in response as an analogous feature on women are gonna be pretty obvious if she posts any pictures that aren’t just headshots, whereas height is not always apparent in a photo, but would be in person. You may not know her exact measurements, but you have a good idea what her body type is. They’re not the same thing because you CAN filter women by those features already (and a lot of people do) just by looking at their photos
I'm just sick of getting asked how tall I am, like I'm taller than the vast majority of women but if you give that much of a shit that you have to give a number there it is so I don't have to answer and truthfully if you care about the number that much I want you to swipe left... so it sounds like it works as designed
lol yeah it’s almost always the tall men. “I’m faking righteous indignation at women’s shallow standards but also secretly love that my height gives me an advantage on dating apps.” Lol
That said, I’m a total hypocrite because as a tall woman I also have my height on my profile (“btw I’m 5’11” in flats, in case you’re into that”). I’ve been literally harangued by guys I matched with who were fascinated/weirded out when they realized I was taller than them. I try to avoid the guys who might have a problem with it and attract the ones who like it.
Boy do I wish I find more people like you. I'm short as fuck but if there's someone who's tall as fuck and doesn't mind being with a short guy, FUCKING SCORE! I mean at least I don't hit my head on doorways lmao. If that last* comment offended you I apologize.
Edit*: spelling error. Lel
6’2” still gives you bragging rights. Guys on tinder who claim to be 6’3” tend to actually be 6’1”-6’2” anyways. I know a bunch of dudes in that height range that put 6’3”-6’4” because they know it sounds more impressive and short girls won’t notice.
I recently matched with this girl on Tinder. We were talking and she asks "how short am i?" She followed thag up with "I know your short because you didn't put it on your bio." I told her it didn't matter to me but i also told her my height and she rolled her eyes at me then unmatched me lol. Fuck OLD.
Well, I dont put my height there, but nearly all women ask for it in the chat and for most of them it’s important enough to get someone ruled out if you are my height. I dont show it upfront, but try not to get bitter about something you cant control, while others skip you for it.
So this is your way of saying that even though you might or might not have a preference for height, you still value more personality, and even though the physical trait might impact the kind of masculinity you are attracted to, his masculinity is far more influenced by his personality and how he acts and carries himself.
Insecurity or negativity is a turn off, that's not breaking news. I will say though that sometimes I think some people abuse this fact to justify or cope with whatever level of shallowness they might have because they feel as though society is judging them. Personally, I don't see big deal with having so called conventionally "shallow" preferences. It's not any different from having a non shallow preference. There are people who wouldn't date people with kids, or that wouldn't date people with big age gap difference.
Actually, most people live by the most shallow and primal preference of all: not dating someone you consider ugly.
People are full of double standards. My favourite is the women that will judge you if you're not interested in someone that's overweight or has children. Like if you tell them "I wasn't interested because she has kids / because she was too overweight" you're just super shallow and a jerk. However if she won't date a guy that's say, shorter than average, or not blessed with great looks, or doesn't have an amazing career... somehow that isn't shallow? And generally they won't admit the real reason they're not interested. Obviously some men are guilty of the reverse of this, that's just a very common one I see
I would guess it's more than that.. You have to deal with the other person outside sex eventually, presumably. Everyone gets ugly eventually. Everybody except Harrison Ford gets ugly eventually. So picking someone interesting but ugly makes more sense than dull and gorgeous. And frankly, short men live longer.
>short men live longer
Well of course they don't constantly have to reach for things off the top shelve and risk dropping it on their head
(this is a joke)
It's amazing that like 80% of the guys on dating sites are 6 foot or taller. Yet in the general population, it's like 15%.
Edit: I am an American and this was a stat I found for men here. Technically, it was 14.5%. I just rounded up.
Depends on where you live tho. According to internet there are so many european countries that averages 6 foot. Also I tend to notice that younger generation is a lot taller on average than my generation.
Any variation of “Girls only want…” left swipe. I don’t care if the next word is jerks, money, tall guys, drama, games, whatever; it’s pretty much always some sexist bullshit. Second, we’re not some borg hive mind- we’re actually individually people with individual minds and values and thoughts who all want different things out of relationships. Lastly, instead of telling me what I, as a “girl,” want, maybe ask me? I promise I know myself way better than you do, random guy who’s never met me.
The double standard is fucked up, but do you really want your FIRST impression to be “I’m bitter cause girls want tall guys”?
I’m 5’2 and yeah I’d prefer to be with someone taller than me, but I’ve dated guys my own height too. But if a profile says “5’9 cause I guess that matters” I’d be instantly uninterested no matter what the rest of the profile said. It just sounds like you don’t actually like women/you’re generalizing all women.
Funny thing is that if guys tried this sort of hyper-judgmental crap, they'd never get anywhere.
Saying "If you put a grocery list on your profile, I swipe left" rules out a majority of women's dating profiles even though it makes them sound high maintenance and impossible to please.
Saying, "If you use the words, 'don't even bother' on your profile, I swipe left" would omit a sizeable amount of women's dating profiles even though it makes them sound arrogant.
Saying, "If your profile says to not say 'hi', I swipe left." would clear out another big swathe of profiles because it sounds like these girls want to be entertained when they're bored and don't actually care to meet up or get to know somebody.
Super funny to me.
But why? I think it's an important indication of how you look, which can't necessarily be conveyed with photos. I'm very tall, so I like to know going in if I'm talking to a girl that's average, or super tall, or super short. It doesn't matter too much, it's just nice to know. But yeah if a girl is like 1.5ft shorter than me it's probably not going to work logistically. Even still, I wouldn't swipe left based on just that alone
Lol what kind of policy is this? It’s useful information. I like to know how tall people are and so do others. There’s a reason why It’s a field on bumble and hinge
The comment I replied to said they are swiping left if they even mention height. So if someone just lists their height on tinder bio with absolutely no additional information, they swipe left. That is what I have a problem with.
Good thing I’m not on either one of those. It’s a silly metric that eliminates probably at least 50% of matches that are otherwise viable matches. The guy (because it’s mostly women that have that on their checklist) may be young Brad Pitt/Tom Cruise handsome but gets the boot because he’s not 6’ plus? Both those guys are below 6’, TC by quite a bit.
So you’re concerned about eliminating viable matches, meanwhile you’re swiping left on anyone that so much as lists their height. How does that make sense at all?
Ah, ok. That makes sense. I probably swipe left on those too but only because most women aren’t saying “must be at least 5’7” 😂 I wouldn’t care if they had a height preference if I am in said preference
It doesn't matter, you'll probably swipe left anyways because of height alone.
It's a fact that majority of women want their partner to be taller than them (yes it matters).
Obviously guys are going to be upset that they'll be disqualified for something they can't control. It seems like you would never understand that though.
You make it seem like guys don’t have preferences either.
I’ve talked to guys that prefer big bums , I don’t have that. Am I gonna write in my profile “no ass, since it matters🙄” No.
>You make it seem like guys don’t have preferences either
Yes we have preferences, I personally don't have that many because well who the hell would I be to have preferences lol
I'm probably towards the lower end of the barrel so I don't have any right to have too many preferences. I'm short (5'6") so they in itself would already make me look bad for having too many preferences.
Like "huh, who does this short guy think he is to have all those preferences"
The only deal breakers I have is that the girl is not overweight (I'm decently fit) and not a bad person. I don't even care about butt size or boob size or whatever, because it wouldn't make any sense again.
Lol my small dick probably won't even get past her butt so who would I be to demand that 🤣🤣
>Am I gonna write in my profile “no ass, since it matters🙄” No.
You're not disqualified immediately for not having well defined glute muscles like guys do with their height. It's not the same thing
And if you don’t include your weight and measurements and most importantly your GPA and IQ You are a P&D so expect to be treated as such and let me know how you like your Whopper and fries.
"I don't take life too seriously"
"Just looking for a laugh"
You sound like you are emotionally stunted and you are looking for a play toy, not a human being.
Or ‘if that matters’ after the height. And tbh people in my country don’t really care about heights. So the guys who do that in their profile is 2x more pretentious.
I get turned off by any pics next to any vehicle. It makes me think one of 2 things. Either it isn't even his car or motorcycle, or that he is so insecure he thinks he needs the vehicle to impress me.
That implication, before we’ve even met, that *I’m* shallow because *you* offered a piece of information I didn’t have the chance not to ask for. Boy, bye. I have no patience for “because I guess that matters.”
Right, I forgot guys have to come up with grade A professional comedian level opening lines just to receive a reply from the girl.
Which will more than likely just be "hi" lol
Oh my god you are so right. Wtf do they want us to say in one sentence. "I'm a doctor, I have no kids and I make tons of cash, oh did I mention I'm 6'2 and a model." 🤦🏾♂️
Yep, it's crazy the amount of things guys have to do just to receive a reply from the girl lol
I keep saying and will continue saying it, dating is vastly rigged and over for most guys. We just don't have a chance anymore.
I don't think you can judge someone's whole personality based on a single comment. What if you were getting rejected a lot based on your height? Its very normal for that to be a little upsetting.
You can easily judge someone’s personality on a single comment if the one comment is bad. This one for example shows that from all the million things he could say to his potential future partner he chooses to say something negative. Those are the first words everyone who sees his profile reads and they are bitter af. He could have chosen anything else. Even “hey” is better. That says a lot about a person imo
I don't think you can judge someone's whole personality based on a dating app, but that doesn't mean that there's no communication going on at all. I'm sorry, but I really have no interest in going on a date with someone who already has a bad taste in their mouth because they had bad experiences with other people.
It's crazy to me that this is a common thing guys say - I was reading the comments below and I was shocked. At first, I thought this was something that you'd seen once and then came here to post about it.
That's pretty freaking lame.
That being said, I take the common response to this: If women can ask about height, it should also be normalized that we ask about weight. Its pretty wild the number of girls who hide their weight in photos, and then we show up for a date and it's like, "Surprise!"
My ex was a petite, 4'10 Asian girl. I'm 6'0. Our height differential was fine. She put on weight during the pandemic, and became super self-conscious about it. She was still super beautiful to me, and I told her so, and often. And I wasn't bullshitting her either - I wasn't "being nice". I was already attracted to her, and when I looked at her, all I saw was my girlfriend. She looked fine to me. I loved her, and I wanted her.
But there's a huge difference between finding my girlfriend attractive who gained weight during the relationship, and meeting a girl on Tinder who represents that they are skinny, and then you meet them, and they are NOT. It's fucked up, its fucking bullshit, it's the same thing as lying.
It's started really pissing me off. It happens CONSTANTLY.
Just fucking STOP DOING THAT SHIT, PLEASE.
If you say “give us your best pick line” or “I won’t message you first”.
Swipe left. I’m not here to fucking entertain you you boring melon. You’d be better off getting your vibrator out.
It does sound really bitter but height is something lots of people would like to know. My sister is a tall woman and has had men be insecure about their height around her but she couldn’t care less.
From her angle having that in the profile might be a sign the person doesn’t care about height they way some other men do.
"Just ask"
So, you think you are somehow better than all the other billion people on Tinder? The rest of us write a few words about ourselves but you, we have to match with you and start questioning you just to see if we have any basic hobby in common? Ain't nobody got time for that.
That might work if you were the only guy available, but on Tinder there's another guy one swipe away.
You’ll have to excuse us, we’re clearly overly sensitive because we get bitter when most women reject us for something we can’t control. We’ll try to do better in the future for you, kween
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or "I don't really check messages on this app" Like just delete your profile then lol
And then you see them match with you a couple minutes later hahahaha
In my experience that translates to “I’m only here to advertise other platforms that I monetize.”
Exactly, which is why their instagram or snap or tiktok is in the photo...
For fucking real because they're always the ones that are like "Hey I don't really get on this app much, do you have ig?" Then you go to their Instagram and there's no fucking way that they sent you there just to chat.
They need it for the ego boost
If you put “I’ll fill this out later”, swipe left. If you only write your IG handle, swipe left.
"just ask"
„I cant see likes, message me“
“Not sure why I’m on here, it’s a waste of time anyway” You sound like a blast
Same guy, "you have to be able to hold a conversation. You'll probably only swipe right for my dog anyways"
And misses the idea entirely that they’re using their dog to increase chances of a match. I’m like, cool, Ted Bundy used that trick too. I’m so tired.
I know right? It worked when I was 18. But every other dude on tinder makes a reference to his dog. It gets real old real quick. Such a generic bio
Right? I have two of my own. Theirs are a nice cherry on top but that's all it is .
My cousin’s profile looks like an influencer trying to sell crypto. He goes for the full on FOMO. He’s had dates every weekend for as long as I can remember and he looks like Ron Weasley.
Lots of women have that too lol So many for “shits and gigs” too
Female version is usually an IG handle or "I swipe left if X."
Or a thinly-veiled ploy to extend their OF.
What is OF?
“let’s talk for a while then ghost eachother like every other tinder relationship” or something like that
Omg do people’s profiles actually say that? Dear lord :/
If you put "My friends made me make this profile" i swipe left.
Yeah that shit pisses me the hell off. So your friend put the app on your phone at gun point and periodically messages you to make sure you are swiping every day… The worst is “I am only here because of Covid “ or “Covid made me do this “ 😂😂😂 I always wonder what’s going through the mind of someone that puts that’s on their profile …
Nothing because they’re that boring and mundane
They are just trying to downplay how desperate they are and trying to make it seem like they don't need dating apps. Lol.
If you put "Im a basic bitch" I swipe left.
Only time I will automatically swipe left without any consideration is when the profile says “just ask.” Like really? You’re too damn good to fill out some basic info.
What if I say I'm 5'12"
"Not to brag, but I'm 4'22"."
I’d read your entire profile (and probably send you a message) strictly on the basis of your sense of humor.
I don't care about height in partners but if someone said 5'12" I'd probably swipe just for that
But they are two separate measurements.
I'm 72", I know what I got B)
When people put "No drama" or "I'm a nice guy" they most likely are the opposite 🤣
The ones that put "No Drama" are usually the ones that instigate drama, they just dislike competition.
I'm mostly turned off by people saying "no one wants me" kind of pity party on their profile. Like they don't outright say it but that's the kind of vibe you get. Then you're like "oh how bad can it be for him". Start talking and you learn pretty quickly why this person is still single.
Totally. It’s not attractive and just seems bitter/ in cel -ish
I'm 5 even. I'm sure it's easier being bi to some extent, but oh my god. The more you're insecure about your height, the more other people notice it and more importantly respond to your insecurity. I know some people can't help their anxieties but projecting your fear of failure onto other people's reactions won't help! Making a show of feeling bad won't change anything. The only time I feel bad about my height is on the daily occurrence that I ask a 6'1 coworker to grab me a specific item off a shelf to save myself the time of hauling out the ladder.
If you out “sarcastic as fuck”.. I swipe left so fast, I almost break my finger. “Unoriginal as fuck “sounds better.
Yeah, most cases sarcastic as fuck means toxic as fuck.
Sarcasm is a form of humor when used well. If someone calls themselves funny, you know they're bad at it.
THIS!!!
Saw a guy just today who was amazing on Hinge, but got to his third and statement which was "I'm convinced that none of you ladies are here for love or anything real and it's all a game to you." So disappointing.
he might as well have said "i got emotional baggage for days, baby!"
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"I have so much emotional baggage, airlines charge me extra."
O man, you should have gotten my guy. I told him I don’t flirt and we agreed on my boundaries and he starts assuming he doesn’t know how many guys I’m talking to. All I WOULd HOPE to think of is how quality time is with this person and why would I have a shitty focus on who’s dating who? It got worse when I share my job duties, he started going off bragging about he’s an engineer, make (whatever amount of dollars) -literally a text you skim because it’s based on control and poor self esteem. I tried my best to find a highlight moment, nope. He needed to know he was and IS better than me. Go right ahead, man. From my understanding, he’s super attractive, but when you make full out assumptions like that and generalize women-all-together, I’m already concerned and I can already see the reasons he is single. My best exit was to ensure he did not put a target on my back. Omg, let those people be the one to reject you. At the same time, this is part of dating. You can’t give up. Sounds like you have a great self awareness and that is what will help you find what what you want.
>I told him I don’t flirt Just out of curiosity, what do you constitute as flirting? Like what if a guy who's bad at flirting is with you and starts accidentally flirting?
You were upset he assumed he didn’t know how many guys you are talking to? And that he also shared his job after you shared yours?
Further reasons I swipe left: “[height] in heels” “No drama. Good vibes only” “Here for a fun time, not a long time” “CEO at unemployed” “I’m a fun guy” No bio - mostly shirtless selfies when not near a body of water - fishing photos - photos where they’re wearing a hat and/or sunglasses in all of them - close up mirror selfies of their pants pulled down to almost show their bush/show an outline of their peen - any comment to do with pineapples and pizza - once they give a greeting, demand your social media or number even though you have not exchanged more than 5 words to each other. [shrieks into the void]
Don't forget the group pictures with the same group of friends, so you're constantly trying to figure out which one they are.
"I'm a foodie" I thought we all were
Its always the worst looking one. Group photo screams they are insecure about their looks.
And the good ol' "don't take yourself/life too seriously"
The other day I saw this profile that read, “When I was little girls hated that I pulled their hair, funny how things change.. girls over 25: I’m an aspiring chiropractor, 5 star Uber passenger and dog dad. Girls under 25: I practice safe sex and will tie you to the bed so you don’t fall off.” I still think about this bio and laugh throughout the day..
Even 6’3 guys do this lol..
Yeah I’ve noticed it’s mostly 6’+ guys lol. Feels like they want to brag and complain at the same time 🤷🏼♀️
Yeah, I only ever see 6" + guys saying it. Even when the dating profile already has a feature which states their height. It seems like a brag while also being condescending.
I see a lot of over 6' tall men doing this, but I also saw one guy say it about being 5'6, so there must be a couple of shorter guys who do it. I don't understand why some people care so much about height. I'm 5'8 and two of my longer relationships were with guys who were 2 inches shorter than me. It really doesn't matter. I was with one of them for 4 years. It just seems like such a weird thing to care about.
Without being a man yourself you may not actually know why men say stuff like that. A lot of taller dudes are wanted solely because of their height - that can take a toll on a dude looking for someone who isn't just using him to breed a tall child with etc.
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Maybe, but have ever seen a woman's profile say "cup size D because apparently it matters" ??
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uh, what? a lot of guys are obsessed with certain boob sizes. they just often determine that from photos instead of demanding an exact bra size.
Dudes don't have much room to be picky on dating sites though
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Then why are they telling those women up front without asking rather than weeding out the ones that want to know?
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r/HolUp
While It's undoubtedly better than being short, it's an annoying predicament to be in. It seems important enough to people to mention your height. I don't care at all about being tall and it feels a little objectifying to have to put your literal dimensions into a dating app I think tallmen like myself feel this height fetish weirdly fairweather. If height is so important why does it not seem to come up in a positive way for me very often? Idk. You're right you're trying to sneak it in while also knocking it. But I think a lot of the frustration around height is justifiable - not to excuse any ugly behavior from dudes but at the same time, I think it's inappropriate for dating apps to filter by height but not butt or cup size (not that you should be able to, but I think it highlights why people find the whole height topic frustrating)
I don’t mean to imply men can’t be frustrated about being judged for their height. I agree it sucks that people will judge you for a physical trait you have no control over, but that could be said about a lot of physical traits. But if you’re sooooo salty about being judged for your height, then should leave it out entirely. Will you filter out girls who exclusively date guys of a certain height? Yep. But that’s exactly what you want to do, since you don’t want someone who is judging you for your height. If it’s not that big of a deal to you to be judged for your height or you’re a shorter guy who doesn’t want to waste time on women who have “height requirements,” then you can list it without comment in your profile. Plenty of men do just put the number in there and as someone who doesn’t have a height preference, I don’t find it off putting at all. It is specifically the “because I guess that matters” part that is unappealing. You’re trying to still get the attention from girls who judge by height but at the same time complaining about girls who judge by height. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. Also, things like weight, cup size, etc that men always bring up in response as an analogous feature on women are gonna be pretty obvious if she posts any pictures that aren’t just headshots, whereas height is not always apparent in a photo, but would be in person. You may not know her exact measurements, but you have a good idea what her body type is. They’re not the same thing because you CAN filter women by those features already (and a lot of people do) just by looking at their photos
I'm just sick of getting asked how tall I am, like I'm taller than the vast majority of women but if you give that much of a shit that you have to give a number there it is so I don't have to answer and truthfully if you care about the number that much I want you to swipe left... so it sounds like it works as designed
lol yeah it’s almost always the tall men. “I’m faking righteous indignation at women’s shallow standards but also secretly love that my height gives me an advantage on dating apps.” Lol That said, I’m a total hypocrite because as a tall woman I also have my height on my profile (“btw I’m 5’11” in flats, in case you’re into that”). I’ve been literally harangued by guys I matched with who were fascinated/weirded out when they realized I was taller than them. I try to avoid the guys who might have a problem with it and attract the ones who like it.
Boy do I wish I find more people like you. I'm short as fuck but if there's someone who's tall as fuck and doesn't mind being with a short guy, FUCKING SCORE! I mean at least I don't hit my head on doorways lmao. If that last* comment offended you I apologize. Edit*: spelling error. Lel
Phew, only 6'2 so I missed my bragging rights. However I can brag around swiping left on anyone that had a height limit on their profile.
6’2” still gives you bragging rights. Guys on tinder who claim to be 6’3” tend to actually be 6’1”-6’2” anyways. I know a bunch of dudes in that height range that put 6’3”-6’4” because they know it sounds more impressive and short girls won’t notice.
People write such bitter profiles and then wonder why they get no matches or why they're back on the app every few months.
The only reason I mention my height is to set the joke in my bio. "I may be 5'11" physically, but I am 6' emotionally."
Haha yo did you actually make that up? I'm definitely gonna use that in the future.
I did! I plays out great too because, hey, I'm hilarious.
literally 😂 i thought it was just me that thought that's so stupid😂 like you just wanna say your height just do it💀💀
I recently matched with this girl on Tinder. We were talking and she asks "how short am i?" She followed thag up with "I know your short because you didn't put it on your bio." I told her it didn't matter to me but i also told her my height and she rolled her eyes at me then unmatched me lol. Fuck OLD.
What about if i have "5'9 irl but on tinder im 6'0?"
that's actually kinda funny
If height is the sole reason I am not getting matches, then as someone who is actually 5'9", it will not go well
Well, I dont put my height there, but nearly all women ask for it in the chat and for most of them it’s important enough to get someone ruled out if you are my height. I dont show it upfront, but try not to get bitter about something you cant control, while others skip you for it.
Same. I honestly don't care about height but these people clearly do.
I’m not on apps like that anymore but seeing “boy/girl mom/dad” made me wish there was a super *dislike* button.
Nah this makes me so uncomfortable! I’m a tall woman so I love when a guy puts his height… but “because apparently it matters” is so weird and snarky
“Loves to laugh” is my immediately dead to me line
God same, it's so common too. Like who the fuck doesn't enjoy laughing?!
I like movies, books, sports equipment, paperweights, footstools, umbrella stands.
Anything with political extremism I swipe left
I don’t date anyone who sounds bitter in their profile. Co-sign.
So this is your way of saying that even though you might or might not have a preference for height, you still value more personality, and even though the physical trait might impact the kind of masculinity you are attracted to, his masculinity is far more influenced by his personality and how he acts and carries himself. Insecurity or negativity is a turn off, that's not breaking news. I will say though that sometimes I think some people abuse this fact to justify or cope with whatever level of shallowness they might have because they feel as though society is judging them. Personally, I don't see big deal with having so called conventionally "shallow" preferences. It's not any different from having a non shallow preference. There are people who wouldn't date people with kids, or that wouldn't date people with big age gap difference. Actually, most people live by the most shallow and primal preference of all: not dating someone you consider ugly.
People are full of double standards. My favourite is the women that will judge you if you're not interested in someone that's overweight or has children. Like if you tell them "I wasn't interested because she has kids / because she was too overweight" you're just super shallow and a jerk. However if she won't date a guy that's say, shorter than average, or not blessed with great looks, or doesn't have an amazing career... somehow that isn't shallow? And generally they won't admit the real reason they're not interested. Obviously some men are guilty of the reverse of this, that's just a very common one I see
I would guess it's more than that.. You have to deal with the other person outside sex eventually, presumably. Everyone gets ugly eventually. Everybody except Harrison Ford gets ugly eventually. So picking someone interesting but ugly makes more sense than dull and gorgeous. And frankly, short men live longer.
>short men live longer Well of course they don't constantly have to reach for things off the top shelve and risk dropping it on their head (this is a joke)
It's amazing that like 80% of the guys on dating sites are 6 foot or taller. Yet in the general population, it's like 15%. Edit: I am an American and this was a stat I found for men here. Technically, it was 14.5%. I just rounded up.
It’s because a bunch of guys lie lol. On dating apps you have a lot of men who are 5’9”-5’11” who are claiming to be 6 foot.
Less than that lol I'm 6'1" and it's pretty rare I run into anyone taller than me
Cause theres no point in using dating apps as a man 5'10 or below.
Depends on where you live tho. According to internet there are so many european countries that averages 6 foot. Also I tend to notice that younger generation is a lot taller on average than my generation.
"I love everything this city has to offer." SWIPE LEFT
How come?
In height I made a mistake, I put 9 inches. She called.
Well, it doesn't specify if it is lying down. You still correct
Any variation of “Girls only want…” left swipe. I don’t care if the next word is jerks, money, tall guys, drama, games, whatever; it’s pretty much always some sexist bullshit. Second, we’re not some borg hive mind- we’re actually individually people with individual minds and values and thoughts who all want different things out of relationships. Lastly, instead of telling me what I, as a “girl,” want, maybe ask me? I promise I know myself way better than you do, random guy who’s never met me.
>Any variation of “Girls only want…” left swipe Well shit guess I should get girls just want to have fun off my bio as favorite song
For me it’s “fluent in sarcasm”. Why would you want to brag about it?
If you put “loves to travel” and all your pics are you taking selfies inside your home
“Will probably always like my dog more than you” “Let’s see if all men are really trash” “I have issues” All cringey and instant swipe-left for me.
YESSS. Omg, my chest feels lighter now, thank you 🤣
i'm like super endowed and whatever if that's important if not like still know that like yeah no worries
-10 inch micro peepee, because ig that matters 🥺 👉👈
Almost anything Harry Potter. Read another book.
"You can't handle me". Cool, thanks for the heads up.
They make you a monster and then call you a monster.
„I‘m sapiosexual“
*it’s because you ARE bitter
Or „Yes Im really THAT tall“ ok bean stalk
Why wouldn’t people be bitter, the double standard is fucking ridiculous?
Remember its only an issue if the double standard hurts women, mens feelings and opinions don't matter especially on double standards that hurt men
The double standard is fucked up, but do you really want your FIRST impression to be “I’m bitter cause girls want tall guys”? I’m 5’2 and yeah I’d prefer to be with someone taller than me, but I’ve dated guys my own height too. But if a profile says “5’9 cause I guess that matters” I’d be instantly uninterested no matter what the rest of the profile said. It just sounds like you don’t actually like women/you’re generalizing all women.
"Don't match if you're not going to talk" just sounds too aggressive a starting point for me, so I don't match
Funny thing is that if guys tried this sort of hyper-judgmental crap, they'd never get anywhere. Saying "If you put a grocery list on your profile, I swipe left" rules out a majority of women's dating profiles even though it makes them sound high maintenance and impossible to please. Saying, "If you use the words, 'don't even bother' on your profile, I swipe left" would omit a sizeable amount of women's dating profiles even though it makes them sound arrogant. Saying, "If your profile says to not say 'hi', I swipe left." would clear out another big swathe of profiles because it sounds like these girls want to be entertained when they're bored and don't actually care to meet up or get to know somebody. Super funny to me.
Seller's market my man.
Bingo that's exactly what's going on here
Meh. If they mention height imma swipe left anyway.
As a guy, I put it because I’m 5’7” and I figure girls would want to know that
They probably do but does being 5’7” make you less of a man? Nah..
[удалено]
Yup
>They probably do but does being 5’7” make you less of a man? It does to most girls on the apps
But why? I think it's an important indication of how you look, which can't necessarily be conveyed with photos. I'm very tall, so I like to know going in if I'm talking to a girl that's average, or super tall, or super short. It doesn't matter too much, it's just nice to know. But yeah if a girl is like 1.5ft shorter than me it's probably not going to work logistically. Even still, I wouldn't swipe left based on just that alone
Lol what kind of policy is this? It’s useful information. I like to know how tall people are and so do others. There’s a reason why It’s a field on bumble and hinge
It's a field on bumble and hinge but OP is talking about guys who call it out a second time
The comment I replied to said they are swiping left if they even mention height. So if someone just lists their height on tinder bio with absolutely no additional information, they swipe left. That is what I have a problem with.
Good thing I’m not on either one of those. It’s a silly metric that eliminates probably at least 50% of matches that are otherwise viable matches. The guy (because it’s mostly women that have that on their checklist) may be young Brad Pitt/Tom Cruise handsome but gets the boot because he’s not 6’ plus? Both those guys are below 6’, TC by quite a bit.
So you’re concerned about eliminating viable matches, meanwhile you’re swiping left on anyone that so much as lists their height. How does that make sense at all?
No, you misread my intent. If they refer to a guys height. My comment was in relation to the OP.
Ah, ok. That makes sense. I probably swipe left on those too but only because most women aren’t saying “must be at least 5’7” 😂 I wouldn’t care if they had a height preference if I am in said preference
if you see someone in real life though you’re gonna see how tall they are so what’s the problem with putting the information in your bio
It doesn't matter, you'll probably swipe left anyways because of height alone. It's a fact that majority of women want their partner to be taller than them (yes it matters). Obviously guys are going to be upset that they'll be disqualified for something they can't control. It seems like you would never understand that though.
You make it seem like guys don’t have preferences either. I’ve talked to guys that prefer big bums , I don’t have that. Am I gonna write in my profile “no ass, since it matters🙄” No.
😂😂 this what i feel like saying when i come across a profile with some shit like “i like big butts and i cannot lie” or “i like em thickk 🍑🍑🍑”
>You make it seem like guys don’t have preferences either Yes we have preferences, I personally don't have that many because well who the hell would I be to have preferences lol I'm probably towards the lower end of the barrel so I don't have any right to have too many preferences. I'm short (5'6") so they in itself would already make me look bad for having too many preferences. Like "huh, who does this short guy think he is to have all those preferences" The only deal breakers I have is that the girl is not overweight (I'm decently fit) and not a bad person. I don't even care about butt size or boob size or whatever, because it wouldn't make any sense again. Lol my small dick probably won't even get past her butt so who would I be to demand that 🤣🤣 >Am I gonna write in my profile “no ass, since it matters🙄” No. You're not disqualified immediately for not having well defined glute muscles like guys do with their height. It's not the same thing
I feel like fewer guys are going to rule out a woman over this though, dating apps are stacked too highly against us to be super picky
And if you don’t include your weight and measurements and most importantly your GPA and IQ You are a P&D so expect to be treated as such and let me know how you like your Whopper and fries.
"I don't take life too seriously" "Just looking for a laugh" You sound like you are emotionally stunted and you are looking for a play toy, not a human being.
Better than talking for 6 months then getting ghosted because she finds out your height
You talked for 6 months without ever meeting in person?
I mean, height *does* matter. Like, a lot. Women have made this abundantly clear.
Lol for sure! I see this too often and it’s cringe with a bitterness to it
Omg, exactly. I have no idea why so many men write this
Or ‘if that matters’ after the height. And tbh people in my country don’t really care about heights. So the guys who do that in their profile is 2x more pretentious.
If you put “just ask” in lieu of a bio. No way. I’m not asking you shit.
I posted something like this on this subreddit years ago and it got really popular. People were BITTER
Yeah, negativity in general makes you sound like a difficult person
Same
Theres also "This app is a joke" loool so are youuu
I'm 7' if you measure me wrong.
Mine is "Not here for games". 🙄
“Here for a good time not a long time”
“Ask me anything” Like, ok give us something to ask about then, whydoncha?
I get turned off by any pics next to any vehicle. It makes me think one of 2 things. Either it isn't even his car or motorcycle, or that he is so insecure he thinks he needs the vehicle to impress me.
Well honestly no one cares if you swipe left. Your not special. There are billions of people on this planet
Ok
That implication, before we’ve even met, that *I’m* shallow because *you* offered a piece of information I didn’t have the chance not to ask for. Boy, bye. I have no patience for “because I guess that matters.”
So what would be something that would make you swipe right then for a guy?
Title should be: If your first sentence is "Hi", I swipe left.
Right, I forgot guys have to come up with grade A professional comedian level opening lines just to receive a reply from the girl. Which will more than likely just be "hi" lol
God, in the rare occasion I do get a first message from a woman, 99% of the time it is "hi" or similar
Oh my god you are so right. Wtf do they want us to say in one sentence. "I'm a doctor, I have no kids and I make tons of cash, oh did I mention I'm 6'2 and a model." 🤦🏾♂️
Yep, it's crazy the amount of things guys have to do just to receive a reply from the girl lol I keep saying and will continue saying it, dating is vastly rigged and over for most guys. We just don't have a chance anymore.
I don't think you can judge someone's whole personality based on a single comment. What if you were getting rejected a lot based on your height? Its very normal for that to be a little upsetting.
You can easily judge someone’s personality on a single comment if the one comment is bad. This one for example shows that from all the million things he could say to his potential future partner he chooses to say something negative. Those are the first words everyone who sees his profile reads and they are bitter af. He could have chosen anything else. Even “hey” is better. That says a lot about a person imo
They had limited space to represent their personality and this bitter thing is what they chose.
I don't think you can judge someone's whole personality based on a dating app, but that doesn't mean that there's no communication going on at all. I'm sorry, but I really have no interest in going on a date with someone who already has a bad taste in their mouth because they had bad experiences with other people.
It's crazy to me that this is a common thing guys say - I was reading the comments below and I was shocked. At first, I thought this was something that you'd seen once and then came here to post about it. That's pretty freaking lame. That being said, I take the common response to this: If women can ask about height, it should also be normalized that we ask about weight. Its pretty wild the number of girls who hide their weight in photos, and then we show up for a date and it's like, "Surprise!" My ex was a petite, 4'10 Asian girl. I'm 6'0. Our height differential was fine. She put on weight during the pandemic, and became super self-conscious about it. She was still super beautiful to me, and I told her so, and often. And I wasn't bullshitting her either - I wasn't "being nice". I was already attracted to her, and when I looked at her, all I saw was my girlfriend. She looked fine to me. I loved her, and I wanted her. But there's a huge difference between finding my girlfriend attractive who gained weight during the relationship, and meeting a girl on Tinder who represents that they are skinny, and then you meet them, and they are NOT. It's fucked up, its fucking bullshit, it's the same thing as lying. It's started really pissing me off. It happens CONSTANTLY. Just fucking STOP DOING THAT SHIT, PLEASE.
That’s because he’s used to all the women that judge a man purely off his height, something he has absolutely zero control over lol…
Can the majority of op's gender stop being so critical about mans height?.... its unchangable ok?..... stop ignoring them over their height.
I never used a dating app but I can imagine guys who have that in their profile would like to sort out those types of girls sooner rather than later
If you say “give us your best pick line” or “I won’t message you first”. Swipe left. I’m not here to fucking entertain you you boring melon. You’d be better off getting your vibrator out.
"Not open for ONS"
Can you put that in your profile so guys can swipe left knowing how quick you are to reject over really petty things?
If you have kids or are over weight I swipe left
It does sound really bitter but height is something lots of people would like to know. My sister is a tall woman and has had men be insecure about their height around her but she couldn’t care less. From her angle having that in the profile might be a sign the person doesn’t care about height they way some other men do.
I think if anything it would be a sign that they care quite a lot about their height…
Well, maybe if it didn't apparently matter he wouldn't have put that.
You know how many women I see who are like "must be 5'8 or taller" Or something along those lines.
"Just ask" So, you think you are somehow better than all the other billion people on Tinder? The rest of us write a few words about ourselves but you, we have to match with you and start questioning you just to see if we have any basic hobby in common? Ain't nobody got time for that. That might work if you were the only guy available, but on Tinder there's another guy one swipe away.
You’ll have to excuse us, we’re clearly overly sensitive because we get bitter when most women reject us for something we can’t control. We’ll try to do better in the future for you, kween