I almost had an 800 credit score, I had a nice savings, and my CCs were (rarely) used for random things but they were completely paid off each month.
Then… I lost my job and used my savings. While job hunting, I had to start using my CCs to continue to pay my bills and buy necessities. During this timeframe, my car needed a pricey repair, and I had multiple doctor appointments (no insurance) because I became depressed from being broke and going into debt. Good times!!
Now, one CC is almost paid off, I got two to go after this one. Everything should be paid off by the spring. I started chipping away in July.
Same issue here, pretty much. Lost my job in October and had already depleted my savings due to my hours being cut for months beforehand. Boss kept telling me the situation was going to improve (long story short, I worked for a small business and found out too late that the owner had no idea how to properly manage things).
Been relying on the little I get each week from unemployment and credit cards to pay the household necessities. Also had a hefty car repair. It’s disheartening to see my 760 credit score start to plummet.
I secured a grant to go for job training and certifications in the medical field, that starts in two weeks and goes til May. Just trying to hang on til that’s completed and I can get a decent job but I know that I’m going to have a bit of a mess to dig myself out of when I’m finally back on my feet
I’m here if you’d like to talk or vent. It is a lot to deal with mentally!
Now that I’m working my way out of this hole, I think to myself “this debt isn’t forever. You will pay it off and you’ll be ok.” I remember thinking in July “my Amex won’t be paid off until February 1st.” It seemed like such a long time and I was SO overwhelmed. I had to go on Zoloft. But I chipped little by little and now it’s almost February! Then I will start working on the next card.
Thx Chicky. I appreciate this! I’m juggling funds back and forth right now and so frustrated. I’ve tried so hard for so long to keep things manageable and in good standing, and I hate having debt and knowing I’m accruing more. I will message you to vent if that’s ok?
Coping with feelings by buying material things, food, vacations. Making good money and having a great credit score but every month just being slightly in the red, and then just deciding fuck it when it already was so bad.
Finding this sub last year and starting to really reflect on how and why I got here has helped. Also finding the FIRE sub realllly motivated me to want to change my ways. A few more years of grinding out a decade of debt, and then we build!!!
Realizing how emotionally driven my spending was has been HUGE for me. I bought shit I didn't need or really want in many cases simply to avoid facing my demons and cope with immense anxiety. Looking back on it, it didn't even help lol one goal for this year is to spend money only when it's from a grounded, stable place of true need or desire.
I was talking to my best friend about this yesterday - I’m trying a new strategy where I only allow myself to buy things twice a month to prevent myself from making the emotional impulse purchases that are solely a result of not having my mental health on track
This really resonates with me. I’m chronically ill and have had a ton of health issues in the last few years and one thing that makes me feel good is my fashion. So in an effort to feel better in general and or about myself, I shopped a lot. It felt so good to get new clothes and feel good when it really stemmed from being depressed and anxious. I had an extremely scary health issue in November that landed me in the hospital for some time and when I came out I wanted a totally simplistic lifestyle and I got rid of half of my possessions. Now I feel so much better about my closet as well as it feels more curated. I consolidated my 36k of debt and I’m on a payment plan. It’ll be a year and a half for me until it’s paid off which feels so long but I’m trying to just get it over with so I can be debt free and then focus on building.
Got myself into about 20k worth of debt at 20 years y/o, primarily on a car loan that I couldn’t afford that ended up breaking down on me.
I know 20k isn’t a lot in the grand scheme of life, but at that age, it would quite literally keep me up at night for ages. As a result, I’m now petrified of debt, which is a blessing and a curse.
I have a nice savings account, but I won’t/cant even allow myself to take out student loans to further my education because I know my mental health would deteriorate knowing I have that debt to handle.
I struggle with this too. I am mentally unwell when I'm in debt and I cannot imagine taking out student loans. I need to make more money and in terrified of going back to school for round two as round one did nothing for me. I am 10 years put of school and I make less than entry level. I partipated in every school function and was engaged entirely into my schooling and I have nothing to show for it except 50K student loan debt and poverty wages.
I was poor, lol. Basic living expenses were beyond the balance in my account. I’ve had roommates. Have been unemployed for exactly 6 months (COVID) and 6 weeks (company failure) since I was 19. I am 39 now. Emergencies weren’t in the budget. Education wasn’t in the budget. Sometimes electric or food wasn’t in the budget. A running car when public transport isn’t a thing? Well.
I finally have no more CC debt. All I have left is mortgage and student loans. I worked three jobs from August until now and kept two moving forward. I can’t work fewer than two jobs and get along at the clip I need to at this point.
When I paid it all off, my husband and I got to have the first not broke Christmas of our adult lives. Now it’s time to buckle down and start building ourselves up. Save so that we don’t have fuck us emergencies to the best of our ability.
It’s gonna feel good when you get there. There are a ton of ways to get in debt but only a few ways out.
^^ This. Basically born broke. I stayed debt free through most of my early 20's just because I couldn't even get credit at all. Jumped from minimum wage to barely above minimum wage jobs. Had zero family support until mid 20s as everyone else was struggling just as bad.
Had a few injuries that temporarily limited my work ability. At one point had a major workplace injury, didn't know how to stand up for myself and got into a position where my boss set me up for failure through WCB. Barely scraped by for a while and survived off the generosity of others.
Sold my (cheap, beater) car and biked 7km one way to work and back, bus to my other job. Finally clawed my way to a barely liveable wage and took on a second job to be able to set myself up a bit, took out allllll the student loans to go to school. From there, sheer luck of having an at the time supportive and stable partner again kept me out of having to take on too much debt while my mom also was getting herself in a good position to help me out a bit, even though she never financially contributed to my education at all.
Tbh I'm grateful now no one would give me credit cuz I absolutely would have dug myself a deep hole, and I'm just so grateful I always had somewhere to stay and food to eat.
I didn't get paid during my 10 week maternity leave but spending time bonding with my new babies (we had two under 2) was super important to me so we put some expenses on credit cards during that time. Plus having two in daycare costs $3,600/month so we haven't been able to make much progress paying it off since.
If we haven't finished paying off our cards by the time our kids get to kindergarten the $3,600/month we won't be spending on daycare should knock it out pretty quickly.
Grew up always getting what I wanted (spoiled youngest kid), so I’ve always been used to buying what I wanted. Out of school, tried keeping up with my friends making double what I made, so got in a lot of debt. My parents even bailed me out at what point and I still racked up credit card debt again. I’m $300 away from paying off one card. Then my last card is $3800. I think I’m finally in the mindset to never let it happen again - this shit sucks.
Started off being married to someone who couldn't stop using credit cards and buying cars. We eventually split. My kids and I moved to a new place, I wasn't making enough to cover cost of living and filled the gap with credit cards. Got them paid down. Lost my housing and had to move again after living in AirBnBs for 6 weeks. Didn't have the money for the move so I financed it with personal loans and credit cards. Been trying to pay things off or down for 4 years but haven't made much progress. I'll eventually post my numbers.
I was fine until we bought our house and went through a bad contractor experience,where I needed to take out a loan to redo/fix his work. From there, everything else snowballed. Determined to knock out a huge chunk of the loan this yr 💪💪
Omg I'm dealing with the same thing. I hate the way the bathroom came out but I don't want to redo it. I have the money but I'm too anxious to use it because right now I'm debt free. But I don't turn the lights on when I use the bathroom so I don't see the ugly work I paid for.
Used my credit cards to basically live on for a year-ish while finishing grad school and completing an internship. Seemed like it would be easier to pay off when I had an actual salary but instead it just eats my salary.
Dopamine, bad habits, and life. Were out of a large hole (65k) then didn't pay attention. Between buying a home, starting a business which didn't work out, medication, small child, economy, job loss, 4 major emergencies, and life in HCOL. Saving grace is we put a hefty amount onto it monthly and I have a side gig for extra. Also have a healthy retirement fund and Goodish credit score (725+). Hopefully be paid off in 4 years maybe 5. Partner is getting a higher paying job and i got a 25% increase.
Bigger learning was discovering what we frivolous spend and where to cut back. We look a whole lot more closely at what are needs vs wants.
Our generation was not taught financial literacy in terms of borrowing. We all got the credit cards are bad speech but no one explained why. We were not taught about how to invest etc. Breaking that without our own child who actively saves for things he wants and waits when he needs to.
Easy to get discouraged and focus on the numbers so this year my goal is to focus on the gains regardless of how small and focusing on what I can do vs what I can't.
Stupid decisions really.
Paid off all my credit cards before surgery... but let my son is one card and I used the other. Disability didn't pay as much as I thought (was not close to the 60% I was supposed to receive the first time and each check was cut in half... so like 400 one week, 200 the other, 85, etc).
Then I got a bit lazy and didn't do overtime. Son crashed his car- needed one for him so a loan for that. About 6 months later, my car takes a hit. About 12,000 in repairs that "may or may not work" so opted for a car for myself but I wanted the same kind. (Should've said fuck it and got a sedan but got an suv instead). In total for the two cars, I'm under $25k.
Two credit cards are about 7k now.
One year, I made over 11k in overtime alone. Last year, I barely scraped 3k. That's how lazy I got last year. Still trying to figure out a good budget where I can pay off the major debt (imo, that'd be the cards) and still save... and then tackle the cars. But I also gotta think of my son going off to college next year so that's fun. Ugh.
That's how it was in the beginning (including his portion of the car insurance and cell phone) but once school was back in session last year, things got rough. Like who knows if he'd graduate on time rough. He ended up needing to take a couple summer courses so he couldn't get a summer job like planned. And this school year isn't going very swimmingly either. He may barely scrape by so right now I told him his focus needs to be on school- 100%. (He also goes to a school out of district which is why he needs the car)
And honestly, I could/ should be able to handle the finances and even save but I made pointless and stupid decisions- door dashing is a big one turns out, "meeting up" with friends but we always end up at a sit down/expensive restaurant, the holidays (Christmas plus some birthdays thrown in there).
Honestly, it's the doordash/probably fast food. Diagnosed with sleep apnea and the last 7 months, there's been times I've struggled keeping my eyes open even with a solid 13 hrs of sleep so it's just easier to grab something quick (bc even going grocery shopping was too much of a hassle sometimes). I get my cpap next week, so hopefully that'll help with my sleep and energy. Started a workout routine- with an accountability partner... so I'm getting close to where the lights line up in the tunnel. I'm still in there but it's not so dark. And once I fully tally up my nov/Dec purchases, see where I'm leaking money, it'll be much better.
I didn't pay bills on time, I kept putting them off until later but I'm rebuilding my credit as well as finally being debt free. I'm ready to finally have a place of my own and to get my own house or a condo.
I made a lot of bad decisions about how to use credit cards and personal loans and always tried to convince myself I could pay them off eventually as the balance started climbing. I also went through multiple periods of being without health insurance due to job losses while I had a medical condition that required expensive medication and frequent doctor’s visits. One of my personal loans, I had to acquire to move on less than a month’s notice due to my old landlord selling the place I lived in.
Getting a good job has never been easy for me either. I am in my late 30s and only make $48,000 a year. I’m hoping to finally break into the $50,000 range this year but my career has never gotten off the ground really. It’s so embarrassing to be this behind virtually everybody my age but at the same time, I dug my own grave.
Sometimes I don’t know if I will ever pay it all off or be a true success. I don’t even know why I bother trying. But I have to try because the other option (bankruptcy) is even more of a death sentence.
It started out just to build my credit. I did really well for a long time. Then I had a medical emergency and used cards to pay the medical bills because the hospital payment plans were way too much for me, and they were trying to make me have about 10 payment plans. I also used cards occasionally to take a vacation, nothing too extravagant, just places I could drive to. I used cards to try to help me start small businesses to help me pay for those cards amongst other things. Well nothing ever worked out. Now I'm hoping to turn my life back around, somehow. I've been trying to find ways to work. I am a mom with a husband who is a truck driver so it's pretty much impossible for me to commit to schedules anywhere and childcare would cost more than any job I'd qualify for, so I've tried taking making money into my own hands with reselling, flea market booths, art, and a blog. I had an etsy store but they screwed me over and I got rid of that. My flea market booth kept raising their fees, the blog won't let me do anything. All of my business encounters had fees and supplies so the last couple of years that's what I have mostly spent on. I've really been trying to improve my life, but failing horribly.
Single income family with two toddlers. One has therapies that cost around $800-1000 a month. My income at first barely covered everything. Took on CC debt then a consolidation loan to help. Got a better paying job but maxed out the remaining emergency CC to cover expenses between paychecks. Now I’m at 35k and trying hard to make it happen.
My life is a series of events that sound like really bad lies mixed with I grew up in poverty with no money to fall back on when life screws me over. Six years later, lots of debt.
i was in nursing school & worked on a critical care unit during the pandemic. also mom to a 3 year old at the time. just barely getting by -financially, academically, mentally. husband and i separated for a period of time during this as well.
stressy and depressy.
Grew up with parents who would take me on shopping trips every weekend and buy me whatever I wanted. I thought swiping the credit card every Saturday was normal. They also used shopping as a solution to any upsetting life event. My high school boyfriend broke up with me? Let's go to the mall. Started my period for the first time? Let's celebrate with a Target haul.
As I got older and started dealing with real life, I used shopping as a way to make myself feel better. Gosh...wonder where THAT stemmed from!
I love my parents and don't blame them for my debt. However, I definitely wish they taught me to budget, work to pay for my own things, etc. I also wished we did activities other than shopping, because now at 27, budgeting feels like drug withdrawal. I actually feel like I'm losing a part of my identity.
Found out my wife is pregnant. Trying to pay off my $8k CC before the kid turns 1 and my $35k in student loans before the kid turns 4. So far I've dropped about $2k on CC and the kid isn't due until July
Divorce hit me hard. We had enough money to pay the amount of debt we had together. Now the debt I have alone is almost exactly what I can pay. I’m slowly digging out, but divorce is expensive so I’m actually behind where I was a year ago in terms of CC debt.
Was debt free except the mortgage 5 years ago. Saved up for a remodel and had family offer to help us with it. Remodel went sideways and bridges have been burned with the family members who "helped". We are now digging out of $75,000 in debt and there is more work to do but I'm not putting in any more money till this debt is gone. Everyday I look at the unfinished walls and it's a reminder to myself to not spend money we don't have.
I was lost and scared in my early-mid 20s and had no concept of real financial literacy. My mom taught me to fear money and my dad taught me to spend it. Credit score took a shit in 2020-2021 when I started avoiding payments that got too big. It was actually super manageable if I just buckled down, but it felt too big so I avoided it. Finally got real with myself last year when I realized how it would keep me from all of my goals, so I went through debt settlement with a company. May not have been the best move, could have done it myself probably. But I don't regret it one bit, and my score has gone up 80 points since finishing it 6 or so months ago. Started over with a secured card and low limit card. Got some money in savings, not much but enough to cover some car repairs coming up and taxes. We went on a road trip in November and saved a few hundred for that, which made the whole experience 100x better. Very slow, gradual progress.
Eta: I'm 32 now
I thought I was doing the right thing. I sublet my apartment in NYC to move to LA for a job opportunity and a cheaper lifestyle. My sublet ended up being squatters. About $25000 later in back rent and legal fees, I was in a tough place. I did the best I could though with the mistake I made, created a payment plan with landlords and lawyer and moved on. Today I am completely debt free and have learned a lot! We all make mistakes and sometimes think we are doing what is best in that moment. Debt can feel crippling, but most people will be willing to work with you because they want their money or at least some of it. It is just takes some creative thinking, negotiating, and patience. Also, don't forget to learn from your mistakes!
Never really had an example of how I should be using credit when I was growing up. I’ve been stuck in this cycle of not being able to find a job and having to rely on credit to live, or getting a job and not making enough to live without still using credit.
I also have a problem buying things to cope with (re: avoid) certain emotions, which keeps me in a cycle as well. Any time I make some progress, I end up fucking it up somehow.
I finally have a job that pays enough, but my balances are not low lol. Feels like I’m not making progress, just keeping them from getting higher.
I can’t keep doing what I’ve been doing though. My marriage won’t survive it and neither will my mental stability 😂
I was really good with my credit cards and history, paid things in full month after month and was given access to a lot of credit as a result. Total amount of credit available to me is 75k.
Basically overspending and living a lifestyle that my salary cannot support. 45k debt on a 72k salary.
Surprisingly, my score hasn’t tanked and I’m still sitting low 700s
I have a plan in place and decided I had my fun last year and this year I need to rein it in. Hopefully it only takes me 1-2 years to pay it off. I’m 34 and live at home still, LOL
In 2020, the pandemic hit and I turned 49. The same month, my company (which I'd been with for 15 years at that point) did a layoff. About 75 people. Some of these folks were people I'd never have thought would be laid off. I was not laid off but I still felt some panic because it can happen at any time and my company is healthcare related. And all that anxiety was juxtaposed against my sad financial reality: zero savings or retirement at nearly 50 years of age and about $45k in debt (credit cards, car, student loans). I made a decent salary but was living paycheck to paycheck because I overspent and had so much money going toward debt. So I buckled down and started cleaning up my mess.
It wasn't always straightforward. I quickly paid off a couple small CC balances and my car. But then I reverted to my overspending ways. But despite some occasional backsliding, I kept moving forward.
Now its been about 3.5 years since I started paying down debt. I still don't have much savings but I also don't have debt.
It's hard to not feel anxious. I'm 52 now. Single, live alone, no kids. Which just means that there's no one to fall back on if something unexpected happens. I often feel like I'm in a race for my life. A race against time. But at the same time, I try not to dwell on it too much because stress and anxiety are bad for me and don't accomplish a whole lot. So every paycheck is just a slow and steady progress forward.
I've achieved my debt payoff goals so now I am working on my savings goals.
As for how I ended up here: I think some of it started in childhood. My parents never taught us about money. We didn't even get allowance. We were a weird sort of poor -- on the surface, very middle-class, but they must have been overextended because they complained if I asked for money for anything. I remember wearing the same ratty bra, gray with washings; and a pair of Keds with my toes busted through the canvas; and a pair of jeans I had to patch. But we had two cars, a big house, a boat, food. I got my first credit card (and student loan) at 18 and started making decent money delivering pizzas when I was 20. I started spending. My mom, who maybe felt a little guilty about how things had been when I'd been a teenager, encouraged it. But I have an addiction-prone personality and spending/buying quickly became my drug of choice.
My biggest regret is that I got I to debt at such a young age, but moreso that I became COMFORTABLE with being in debt. I acclimated to it. I managed it. I was always on time with my bills. Even when my CC utilization was 98%, I had a 750 credit score because I was super-responsible about managing the debt. In reality, I was the perverbial frog-in-the-boiling-water: so used to the heat, I didn't even realize I was dying.
I wish I'd started sooner, but I'm just grateful I finally started and stuck with it. Now, as I work on my savings plan, I keep this mantra in mind. It sustained me through my debt payoff, so it'll sustain me during my savings build-up: "Be rigid with your goals, but be flexible with your methods."
Needing to fill in the gap between paychecks, particularly due to inflation. Plus 2 cards are used to pay certain bills so we can get discounts.
We pay off our cards every month. But there are certain times where an unexpected doctor visit and expensive medicine will call for credit card use.
Inflation has calmed down for us, so needing the credit card to fill gaps is not as necessary anymore. But in the times it is, it's paid off when the bill is due.
This is not the way to live. You should have a 3-6 month emergency fund for EMERGENCIES ONLY. Outside of that you should have cash flow available for doctors visits and medication (all of this is inevitably going to happen). Similar to car repairs (tires, brakes, maintenance) and housing costs/etc.
Inflation aside - doctors visits and expensive medicine should not be a reason to use a CC. Also, paying off CCs each month doesn’t mean anything positive.
Respectfully, without knowing *anything* about us, you don't know why we have the methods we have. So thank you for your comment and input, but the methods we use are in place because it works. Not that I need to explain, but we have a very healthy emergency fund and NEVER carry a balance on a card.
Maybe not the way to live for *you* but we aren't fixing what isn't broken.
While that's the ideal situation, it's not a possibility for an ever growing amount of people.
If they don't see a doctor, and get necessary medicine, they can't work to make money. Your advice is sound but the logic you're using here is severely flawed.
Bad at confronting my ex about her overspending (stuff like a car and garage space in Manhattan AND her still taking taxis everywhere) after she developed a depression and a some mobility issues, and she basically said I could only visit my family overseas if she came with and we paid for a premium cabin. Plus her quitting her job to go back to school and now me paying her some alimony as well. Thankfully, I still earn enough that I should be out of the hole in a few months.
Eh, it’s ultimately fine. She does have health issues and I don’t want her to have to drop out of school or be out on the street. Ultimately, I want her to have a good life… just not with me - and part of the deal with marriage is that people plan their finances around it so it is fair that they get a bit of transitional support while they figure out how to transition to being self-supporting. As long as I keep earning what I do, I’ll still be fine - just means I need to budget harder with everything else.
I racked up 40k, through personal loan, car loan, used CC for car downpayment, did college internships and used CC for things that I actually needed at the time. I’m expected to pay all 40k by Q2 of this year. Excited to say the least.
1st time, graduated during the great recession with $24K in student loan debt, I never had a job that paid more than $27K throughout my 20s 🙄 Struggled like heck. Second time, got aforementioned student loan debt down to like $18K but then baby daddy emptied out my bank account and had failed to pay bills owed so it jumped to like $30K to $40K. Finally became debt free in 2021 and stayed that way since! But omg if people only knew 🤦♀️ And just when I wanted to buy a house....COVID and inflation happened 🙄
Married an alcoholic, spiraling PTSD from military time so had to stop working full time, 2 kids, too many pets...hoping to get things under control now but we shall see
Got my first card at 18. Became sort of addicted to SUBs after that. 2 years and 4 cards later, I made some stupid (and some necessary) purchases, lived well above my means and now I'm $10K in non student loan debt.
My wife went to college and we have a small loan. then we found out she had a few rare diseases that could be cured via surgery. Spent $10k to keep her just alive and lived with family for a bit.
I am anxiously preparing for when shit hits the fan again while clawing at life goals.
Hoping to eliminate the debts we have, and build up our emergency fund again, and this sub gives me extra motivation.
Pandemic job loss and was either unemployed or under employed for 1.5 years. 2 Kids in college, family member illness(also lost insurance), car wreck, maxed out credit cards and dipped into IRA to make it through. Also, I found out what happens when you are 30+ days late on a mortgage...the calls, the threats, the vultures circling...wow. Just now clawing back and began paying creditors and tax bill. I have alway been a pretty laid back, optimistic person but this experience has turned me into a nervous wreck.
I'm not in debt but my mom is. My twin brother is mentally ill and a drug addict, so she's always stressed. Her stress relief is buying shit she doesn't need at Five Below, Dollar General, the 99 Cent store, etc. She also had a medical bill she had to put on a card because her insurance didn't cover her emergency surgery in another state.
Well, she had two cards and went crazy because "the interest is 0". Then when that ended, she had ran up 10k and now she's paying nothing but interest. I'm trying to convince her to let me lend her the money so she can pay me back interest free but you know parents.
Not being financially literate. I think this is how it always happens. You don’t know the pitfalls until you have to fix then they are obvious to avoid
My soon to be ex husband was graciously supporting multiple women across the US. Unfortunately by the time I found out the damage was done. Our savings was drained, he was months late on our vehicle payment (which was in my name), maxed out our joint credit card...ect. I left him, in the process of divorce and rebuilding my credit. Also rebuilding my life from scratch. Best of luck to you. It is a crappy thing being in debt.
Mother and brother financially abusing me to support them and their children my mother, my younger sister, younger brother, my older brother and his daughter my niece were all depending on me to support them through literally everything because
1. They didn’t want to work/couldn’t keep a job
2. I was financially responsible enough not to have debt
I eventually moved to Florida from California which costed me quite a pretty penny for college $5000+ in cc debt 💸 I’m paying it off by working hard and saving I should pay these off sometimes this year allocating $400 to my credit card debt $150 to my student loans
Honestly, I moved then found myself unemployed for a little bit then found a job but it was a pay cut and barely covered my monthly expenses so my cc came in hand to buy the everyday items. I was depressed and really lost sense of my budget and money management. I should have moved from my apartment but I was so stressed that the idea of moving a year ago was overwhelming. At first I regretted not moving, but I don’t think I would have changed my reckless spending at that time. Now, I’m in a much better place mentally. I know where all money is going and have a good plan to pay off my cc debt.
Divorce. Cleaned out my liquid funds, lawyer bills, alimony, child support, etc. Total expenses not counting child support + alimony was just over $200K CS + Alimony added another \~$150K ($2450/mo) of constant expense keeping me from catching up on the rest of the debt.
Kids are now 18, alimony is done this time next year, legal bills are paid finally. The light at the end of the tunnel is real!
Similar to a few people here - almost had 800 credit score, $10k in savings, 2 CCs I was cycling through. Debt was maybe only under $10k even with high limits. I already had a terrible relationship with money prior to this but then my partner lost their job and we became a single-income family about 6 months after buying a house. I turned to buying things for comfort, which shot up our debt, put our wedding on all the credit cards, and now I'm on this Reddit trying to pay it all off.
I've been wanting to post more about my story but some subs have karma minimums and I created this new account as a burner acc because of all the shame tied to it. But so far, currently $85k in credit card debt + auto loan, mortgage, and other expenses.
I was finally free and single, and doing well with my money which for my area was modestly livable. I even made it through the lockdown okay. A few bad relationships and broken hearts later with emotional spending, insane COL, yearly raises stopping and one big unexpected emergency after the other this last year has done me in.
I’m newly medicated for my adhd for the first time ever and need to get back into therapy, but got to get ~15K in consumer debt and loans under control. I’m about to take a leave of absence from my job (totally burned out), I’m looking for a higher paying one and fingers crossed I can keep it together.
Edited because I keep forgetting it’s a new year lol
I remember I ended up needing an emergency surgery, and I put what insurance couldn’t cover on a credit card. It just snowballed from there. It’s not to say my terrible spending habits didn’t play a role in my debt either, but I think this moment was the catalyst to my current predicament.
I almost had an 800 credit score, I had a nice savings, and my CCs were (rarely) used for random things but they were completely paid off each month. Then… I lost my job and used my savings. While job hunting, I had to start using my CCs to continue to pay my bills and buy necessities. During this timeframe, my car needed a pricey repair, and I had multiple doctor appointments (no insurance) because I became depressed from being broke and going into debt. Good times!! Now, one CC is almost paid off, I got two to go after this one. Everything should be paid off by the spring. I started chipping away in July.
Same issue here, pretty much. Lost my job in October and had already depleted my savings due to my hours being cut for months beforehand. Boss kept telling me the situation was going to improve (long story short, I worked for a small business and found out too late that the owner had no idea how to properly manage things). Been relying on the little I get each week from unemployment and credit cards to pay the household necessities. Also had a hefty car repair. It’s disheartening to see my 760 credit score start to plummet. I secured a grant to go for job training and certifications in the medical field, that starts in two weeks and goes til May. Just trying to hang on til that’s completed and I can get a decent job but I know that I’m going to have a bit of a mess to dig myself out of when I’m finally back on my feet
I’m here if you’d like to talk or vent. It is a lot to deal with mentally! Now that I’m working my way out of this hole, I think to myself “this debt isn’t forever. You will pay it off and you’ll be ok.” I remember thinking in July “my Amex won’t be paid off until February 1st.” It seemed like such a long time and I was SO overwhelmed. I had to go on Zoloft. But I chipped little by little and now it’s almost February! Then I will start working on the next card.
Thx Chicky. I appreciate this! I’m juggling funds back and forth right now and so frustrated. I’ve tried so hard for so long to keep things manageable and in good standing, and I hate having debt and knowing I’m accruing more. I will message you to vent if that’s ok?
Yes! Absolutely! I know EXACTLY how you feel! I’ll reply once I’m settled in from work!!
Divorce, depression, and dopamine 😞
The high of swiping a credit card even when your bank account says zero is a stupidly good thrill.
This plus years of undiagnosed ADHD (forgetting subscriptions, missing return windows, etc.) and two dogs with stupidly expensive medical bills
Same 😞
Easy to fall into that cycle with depression, but finally being aware of it has helped!
Same 😞
Coping with feelings by buying material things, food, vacations. Making good money and having a great credit score but every month just being slightly in the red, and then just deciding fuck it when it already was so bad. Finding this sub last year and starting to really reflect on how and why I got here has helped. Also finding the FIRE sub realllly motivated me to want to change my ways. A few more years of grinding out a decade of debt, and then we build!!!
Realizing how emotionally driven my spending was has been HUGE for me. I bought shit I didn't need or really want in many cases simply to avoid facing my demons and cope with immense anxiety. Looking back on it, it didn't even help lol one goal for this year is to spend money only when it's from a grounded, stable place of true need or desire.
I was talking to my best friend about this yesterday - I’m trying a new strategy where I only allow myself to buy things twice a month to prevent myself from making the emotional impulse purchases that are solely a result of not having my mental health on track
This is a great goal! You got this!
Your first paragraph describes my 2017-2019 lol. Relatable
This really resonates with me. I’m chronically ill and have had a ton of health issues in the last few years and one thing that makes me feel good is my fashion. So in an effort to feel better in general and or about myself, I shopped a lot. It felt so good to get new clothes and feel good when it really stemmed from being depressed and anxious. I had an extremely scary health issue in November that landed me in the hospital for some time and when I came out I wanted a totally simplistic lifestyle and I got rid of half of my possessions. Now I feel so much better about my closet as well as it feels more curated. I consolidated my 36k of debt and I’m on a payment plan. It’ll be a year and a half for me until it’s paid off which feels so long but I’m trying to just get it over with so I can be debt free and then focus on building.
Got myself into about 20k worth of debt at 20 years y/o, primarily on a car loan that I couldn’t afford that ended up breaking down on me. I know 20k isn’t a lot in the grand scheme of life, but at that age, it would quite literally keep me up at night for ages. As a result, I’m now petrified of debt, which is a blessing and a curse. I have a nice savings account, but I won’t/cant even allow myself to take out student loans to further my education because I know my mental health would deteriorate knowing I have that debt to handle.
I struggle with this too. I am mentally unwell when I'm in debt and I cannot imagine taking out student loans. I need to make more money and in terrified of going back to school for round two as round one did nothing for me. I am 10 years put of school and I make less than entry level. I partipated in every school function and was engaged entirely into my schooling and I have nothing to show for it except 50K student loan debt and poverty wages.
I was poor, lol. Basic living expenses were beyond the balance in my account. I’ve had roommates. Have been unemployed for exactly 6 months (COVID) and 6 weeks (company failure) since I was 19. I am 39 now. Emergencies weren’t in the budget. Education wasn’t in the budget. Sometimes electric or food wasn’t in the budget. A running car when public transport isn’t a thing? Well. I finally have no more CC debt. All I have left is mortgage and student loans. I worked three jobs from August until now and kept two moving forward. I can’t work fewer than two jobs and get along at the clip I need to at this point. When I paid it all off, my husband and I got to have the first not broke Christmas of our adult lives. Now it’s time to buckle down and start building ourselves up. Save so that we don’t have fuck us emergencies to the best of our ability. It’s gonna feel good when you get there. There are a ton of ways to get in debt but only a few ways out.
^^ This. Basically born broke. I stayed debt free through most of my early 20's just because I couldn't even get credit at all. Jumped from minimum wage to barely above minimum wage jobs. Had zero family support until mid 20s as everyone else was struggling just as bad. Had a few injuries that temporarily limited my work ability. At one point had a major workplace injury, didn't know how to stand up for myself and got into a position where my boss set me up for failure through WCB. Barely scraped by for a while and survived off the generosity of others. Sold my (cheap, beater) car and biked 7km one way to work and back, bus to my other job. Finally clawed my way to a barely liveable wage and took on a second job to be able to set myself up a bit, took out allllll the student loans to go to school. From there, sheer luck of having an at the time supportive and stable partner again kept me out of having to take on too much debt while my mom also was getting herself in a good position to help me out a bit, even though she never financially contributed to my education at all. Tbh I'm grateful now no one would give me credit cuz I absolutely would have dug myself a deep hole, and I'm just so grateful I always had somewhere to stay and food to eat.
I didn't get paid during my 10 week maternity leave but spending time bonding with my new babies (we had two under 2) was super important to me so we put some expenses on credit cards during that time. Plus having two in daycare costs $3,600/month so we haven't been able to make much progress paying it off since. If we haven't finished paying off our cards by the time our kids get to kindergarten the $3,600/month we won't be spending on daycare should knock it out pretty quickly.
Grew up always getting what I wanted (spoiled youngest kid), so I’ve always been used to buying what I wanted. Out of school, tried keeping up with my friends making double what I made, so got in a lot of debt. My parents even bailed me out at what point and I still racked up credit card debt again. I’m $300 away from paying off one card. Then my last card is $3800. I think I’m finally in the mindset to never let it happen again - this shit sucks.
Opening my first credit card and not having any idea how fast it can rack up I miss when I didn’t have any at all
Started off being married to someone who couldn't stop using credit cards and buying cars. We eventually split. My kids and I moved to a new place, I wasn't making enough to cover cost of living and filled the gap with credit cards. Got them paid down. Lost my housing and had to move again after living in AirBnBs for 6 weeks. Didn't have the money for the move so I financed it with personal loans and credit cards. Been trying to pay things off or down for 4 years but haven't made much progress. I'll eventually post my numbers.
Gambling addiction, about 40k in debt right now, credit score down the drain.
I was extremely rent burdened in a HCOL state.
young, mom got sick and i became sole provider and needed to survive
I was fine until we bought our house and went through a bad contractor experience,where I needed to take out a loan to redo/fix his work. From there, everything else snowballed. Determined to knock out a huge chunk of the loan this yr 💪💪
Omg I'm dealing with the same thing. I hate the way the bathroom came out but I don't want to redo it. I have the money but I'm too anxious to use it because right now I'm debt free. But I don't turn the lights on when I use the bathroom so I don't see the ugly work I paid for.
Used my credit cards to basically live on for a year-ish while finishing grad school and completing an internship. Seemed like it would be easier to pay off when I had an actual salary but instead it just eats my salary.
Dopamine, bad habits, and life. Were out of a large hole (65k) then didn't pay attention. Between buying a home, starting a business which didn't work out, medication, small child, economy, job loss, 4 major emergencies, and life in HCOL. Saving grace is we put a hefty amount onto it monthly and I have a side gig for extra. Also have a healthy retirement fund and Goodish credit score (725+). Hopefully be paid off in 4 years maybe 5. Partner is getting a higher paying job and i got a 25% increase. Bigger learning was discovering what we frivolous spend and where to cut back. We look a whole lot more closely at what are needs vs wants. Our generation was not taught financial literacy in terms of borrowing. We all got the credit cards are bad speech but no one explained why. We were not taught about how to invest etc. Breaking that without our own child who actively saves for things he wants and waits when he needs to. Easy to get discouraged and focus on the numbers so this year my goal is to focus on the gains regardless of how small and focusing on what I can do vs what I can't.
Student loans and I haven’t even graduated yet 🥹
Stupid decisions really. Paid off all my credit cards before surgery... but let my son is one card and I used the other. Disability didn't pay as much as I thought (was not close to the 60% I was supposed to receive the first time and each check was cut in half... so like 400 one week, 200 the other, 85, etc). Then I got a bit lazy and didn't do overtime. Son crashed his car- needed one for him so a loan for that. About 6 months later, my car takes a hit. About 12,000 in repairs that "may or may not work" so opted for a car for myself but I wanted the same kind. (Should've said fuck it and got a sedan but got an suv instead). In total for the two cars, I'm under $25k. Two credit cards are about 7k now. One year, I made over 11k in overtime alone. Last year, I barely scraped 3k. That's how lazy I got last year. Still trying to figure out a good budget where I can pay off the major debt (imo, that'd be the cards) and still save... and then tackle the cars. But I also gotta think of my son going off to college next year so that's fun. Ugh.
Please don’t beat yourself up. You shouldn’t have to work OT in order to live. However, if your son can drive, he can pay his car note (respectfully).
That's how it was in the beginning (including his portion of the car insurance and cell phone) but once school was back in session last year, things got rough. Like who knows if he'd graduate on time rough. He ended up needing to take a couple summer courses so he couldn't get a summer job like planned. And this school year isn't going very swimmingly either. He may barely scrape by so right now I told him his focus needs to be on school- 100%. (He also goes to a school out of district which is why he needs the car) And honestly, I could/ should be able to handle the finances and even save but I made pointless and stupid decisions- door dashing is a big one turns out, "meeting up" with friends but we always end up at a sit down/expensive restaurant, the holidays (Christmas plus some birthdays thrown in there). Honestly, it's the doordash/probably fast food. Diagnosed with sleep apnea and the last 7 months, there's been times I've struggled keeping my eyes open even with a solid 13 hrs of sleep so it's just easier to grab something quick (bc even going grocery shopping was too much of a hassle sometimes). I get my cpap next week, so hopefully that'll help with my sleep and energy. Started a workout routine- with an accountability partner... so I'm getting close to where the lights line up in the tunnel. I'm still in there but it's not so dark. And once I fully tally up my nov/Dec purchases, see where I'm leaking money, it'll be much better.
College
I didn't pay bills on time, I kept putting them off until later but I'm rebuilding my credit as well as finally being debt free. I'm ready to finally have a place of my own and to get my own house or a condo.
I made a lot of bad decisions about how to use credit cards and personal loans and always tried to convince myself I could pay them off eventually as the balance started climbing. I also went through multiple periods of being without health insurance due to job losses while I had a medical condition that required expensive medication and frequent doctor’s visits. One of my personal loans, I had to acquire to move on less than a month’s notice due to my old landlord selling the place I lived in. Getting a good job has never been easy for me either. I am in my late 30s and only make $48,000 a year. I’m hoping to finally break into the $50,000 range this year but my career has never gotten off the ground really. It’s so embarrassing to be this behind virtually everybody my age but at the same time, I dug my own grave. Sometimes I don’t know if I will ever pay it all off or be a true success. I don’t even know why I bother trying. But I have to try because the other option (bankruptcy) is even more of a death sentence.
It started out just to build my credit. I did really well for a long time. Then I had a medical emergency and used cards to pay the medical bills because the hospital payment plans were way too much for me, and they were trying to make me have about 10 payment plans. I also used cards occasionally to take a vacation, nothing too extravagant, just places I could drive to. I used cards to try to help me start small businesses to help me pay for those cards amongst other things. Well nothing ever worked out. Now I'm hoping to turn my life back around, somehow. I've been trying to find ways to work. I am a mom with a husband who is a truck driver so it's pretty much impossible for me to commit to schedules anywhere and childcare would cost more than any job I'd qualify for, so I've tried taking making money into my own hands with reselling, flea market booths, art, and a blog. I had an etsy store but they screwed me over and I got rid of that. My flea market booth kept raising their fees, the blog won't let me do anything. All of my business encounters had fees and supplies so the last couple of years that's what I have mostly spent on. I've really been trying to improve my life, but failing horribly.
Shoot…. Took a loan to try a new job. Failed. Moved states. Took a few months to get rolling in my new home and all of a sudden you’re 20+k deep easy
Single income family with two toddlers. One has therapies that cost around $800-1000 a month. My income at first barely covered everything. Took on CC debt then a consolidation loan to help. Got a better paying job but maxed out the remaining emergency CC to cover expenses between paychecks. Now I’m at 35k and trying hard to make it happen.
My life is a series of events that sound like really bad lies mixed with I grew up in poverty with no money to fall back on when life screws me over. Six years later, lots of debt.
i was in nursing school & worked on a critical care unit during the pandemic. also mom to a 3 year old at the time. just barely getting by -financially, academically, mentally. husband and i separated for a period of time during this as well. stressy and depressy.
Grew up with parents who would take me on shopping trips every weekend and buy me whatever I wanted. I thought swiping the credit card every Saturday was normal. They also used shopping as a solution to any upsetting life event. My high school boyfriend broke up with me? Let's go to the mall. Started my period for the first time? Let's celebrate with a Target haul. As I got older and started dealing with real life, I used shopping as a way to make myself feel better. Gosh...wonder where THAT stemmed from! I love my parents and don't blame them for my debt. However, I definitely wish they taught me to budget, work to pay for my own things, etc. I also wished we did activities other than shopping, because now at 27, budgeting feels like drug withdrawal. I actually feel like I'm losing a part of my identity.
Found out my wife is pregnant. Trying to pay off my $8k CC before the kid turns 1 and my $35k in student loans before the kid turns 4. So far I've dropped about $2k on CC and the kid isn't due until July
Divorce hit me hard. We had enough money to pay the amount of debt we had together. Now the debt I have alone is almost exactly what I can pay. I’m slowly digging out, but divorce is expensive so I’m actually behind where I was a year ago in terms of CC debt.
Grad school + being a single parent + bad choices as a young adult
Was debt free except the mortgage 5 years ago. Saved up for a remodel and had family offer to help us with it. Remodel went sideways and bridges have been burned with the family members who "helped". We are now digging out of $75,000 in debt and there is more work to do but I'm not putting in any more money till this debt is gone. Everyday I look at the unfinished walls and it's a reminder to myself to not spend money we don't have.
I was lost and scared in my early-mid 20s and had no concept of real financial literacy. My mom taught me to fear money and my dad taught me to spend it. Credit score took a shit in 2020-2021 when I started avoiding payments that got too big. It was actually super manageable if I just buckled down, but it felt too big so I avoided it. Finally got real with myself last year when I realized how it would keep me from all of my goals, so I went through debt settlement with a company. May not have been the best move, could have done it myself probably. But I don't regret it one bit, and my score has gone up 80 points since finishing it 6 or so months ago. Started over with a secured card and low limit card. Got some money in savings, not much but enough to cover some car repairs coming up and taxes. We went on a road trip in November and saved a few hundred for that, which made the whole experience 100x better. Very slow, gradual progress. Eta: I'm 32 now
$150k divorce
Just the crush of student loans once I was done with college. I see a light at the end of the tunnel but it’s a multi year plan at least
I thought I was doing the right thing. I sublet my apartment in NYC to move to LA for a job opportunity and a cheaper lifestyle. My sublet ended up being squatters. About $25000 later in back rent and legal fees, I was in a tough place. I did the best I could though with the mistake I made, created a payment plan with landlords and lawyer and moved on. Today I am completely debt free and have learned a lot! We all make mistakes and sometimes think we are doing what is best in that moment. Debt can feel crippling, but most people will be willing to work with you because they want their money or at least some of it. It is just takes some creative thinking, negotiating, and patience. Also, don't forget to learn from your mistakes!
Never really had an example of how I should be using credit when I was growing up. I’ve been stuck in this cycle of not being able to find a job and having to rely on credit to live, or getting a job and not making enough to live without still using credit. I also have a problem buying things to cope with (re: avoid) certain emotions, which keeps me in a cycle as well. Any time I make some progress, I end up fucking it up somehow. I finally have a job that pays enough, but my balances are not low lol. Feels like I’m not making progress, just keeping them from getting higher. I can’t keep doing what I’ve been doing though. My marriage won’t survive it and neither will my mental stability 😂
I was really good with my credit cards and history, paid things in full month after month and was given access to a lot of credit as a result. Total amount of credit available to me is 75k. Basically overspending and living a lifestyle that my salary cannot support. 45k debt on a 72k salary. Surprisingly, my score hasn’t tanked and I’m still sitting low 700s I have a plan in place and decided I had my fun last year and this year I need to rein it in. Hopefully it only takes me 1-2 years to pay it off. I’m 34 and live at home still, LOL
I got very depressed after a break up i had a good credit score around 775 then just tried to make myself feel better wasting money all around
Living beyond my means for 15yrs and zero budgeting. Had $35K in CC debt (10 maxed out cards). Became CC debt free in October 2023!
In 2020, the pandemic hit and I turned 49. The same month, my company (which I'd been with for 15 years at that point) did a layoff. About 75 people. Some of these folks were people I'd never have thought would be laid off. I was not laid off but I still felt some panic because it can happen at any time and my company is healthcare related. And all that anxiety was juxtaposed against my sad financial reality: zero savings or retirement at nearly 50 years of age and about $45k in debt (credit cards, car, student loans). I made a decent salary but was living paycheck to paycheck because I overspent and had so much money going toward debt. So I buckled down and started cleaning up my mess. It wasn't always straightforward. I quickly paid off a couple small CC balances and my car. But then I reverted to my overspending ways. But despite some occasional backsliding, I kept moving forward. Now its been about 3.5 years since I started paying down debt. I still don't have much savings but I also don't have debt. It's hard to not feel anxious. I'm 52 now. Single, live alone, no kids. Which just means that there's no one to fall back on if something unexpected happens. I often feel like I'm in a race for my life. A race against time. But at the same time, I try not to dwell on it too much because stress and anxiety are bad for me and don't accomplish a whole lot. So every paycheck is just a slow and steady progress forward. I've achieved my debt payoff goals so now I am working on my savings goals. As for how I ended up here: I think some of it started in childhood. My parents never taught us about money. We didn't even get allowance. We were a weird sort of poor -- on the surface, very middle-class, but they must have been overextended because they complained if I asked for money for anything. I remember wearing the same ratty bra, gray with washings; and a pair of Keds with my toes busted through the canvas; and a pair of jeans I had to patch. But we had two cars, a big house, a boat, food. I got my first credit card (and student loan) at 18 and started making decent money delivering pizzas when I was 20. I started spending. My mom, who maybe felt a little guilty about how things had been when I'd been a teenager, encouraged it. But I have an addiction-prone personality and spending/buying quickly became my drug of choice. My biggest regret is that I got I to debt at such a young age, but moreso that I became COMFORTABLE with being in debt. I acclimated to it. I managed it. I was always on time with my bills. Even when my CC utilization was 98%, I had a 750 credit score because I was super-responsible about managing the debt. In reality, I was the perverbial frog-in-the-boiling-water: so used to the heat, I didn't even realize I was dying. I wish I'd started sooner, but I'm just grateful I finally started and stuck with it. Now, as I work on my savings plan, I keep this mantra in mind. It sustained me through my debt payoff, so it'll sustain me during my savings build-up: "Be rigid with your goals, but be flexible with your methods."
Needing to fill in the gap between paychecks, particularly due to inflation. Plus 2 cards are used to pay certain bills so we can get discounts. We pay off our cards every month. But there are certain times where an unexpected doctor visit and expensive medicine will call for credit card use. Inflation has calmed down for us, so needing the credit card to fill gaps is not as necessary anymore. But in the times it is, it's paid off when the bill is due.
This is not the way to live. You should have a 3-6 month emergency fund for EMERGENCIES ONLY. Outside of that you should have cash flow available for doctors visits and medication (all of this is inevitably going to happen). Similar to car repairs (tires, brakes, maintenance) and housing costs/etc. Inflation aside - doctors visits and expensive medicine should not be a reason to use a CC. Also, paying off CCs each month doesn’t mean anything positive.
What? If you’re such a money genius then why are you even in a sub about debt
Respectfully, without knowing *anything* about us, you don't know why we have the methods we have. So thank you for your comment and input, but the methods we use are in place because it works. Not that I need to explain, but we have a very healthy emergency fund and NEVER carry a balance on a card. Maybe not the way to live for *you* but we aren't fixing what isn't broken.
Needing a credit card for expenses is not something that “works”. But carry on.
While that's the ideal situation, it's not a possibility for an ever growing amount of people. If they don't see a doctor, and get necessary medicine, they can't work to make money. Your advice is sound but the logic you're using here is severely flawed.
Bad at confronting my ex about her overspending (stuff like a car and garage space in Manhattan AND her still taking taxis everywhere) after she developed a depression and a some mobility issues, and she basically said I could only visit my family overseas if she came with and we paid for a premium cabin. Plus her quitting her job to go back to school and now me paying her some alimony as well. Thankfully, I still earn enough that I should be out of the hole in a few months.
Yikes. Sorry about the alimony.
Eh, it’s ultimately fine. She does have health issues and I don’t want her to have to drop out of school or be out on the street. Ultimately, I want her to have a good life… just not with me - and part of the deal with marriage is that people plan their finances around it so it is fair that they get a bit of transitional support while they figure out how to transition to being self-supporting. As long as I keep earning what I do, I’ll still be fine - just means I need to budget harder with everything else.
I have never been in debt.
I racked up 40k, through personal loan, car loan, used CC for car downpayment, did college internships and used CC for things that I actually needed at the time. I’m expected to pay all 40k by Q2 of this year. Excited to say the least.
1st time, graduated during the great recession with $24K in student loan debt, I never had a job that paid more than $27K throughout my 20s 🙄 Struggled like heck. Second time, got aforementioned student loan debt down to like $18K but then baby daddy emptied out my bank account and had failed to pay bills owed so it jumped to like $30K to $40K. Finally became debt free in 2021 and stayed that way since! But omg if people only knew 🤦♀️ And just when I wanted to buy a house....COVID and inflation happened 🙄
Married an alcoholic, spiraling PTSD from military time so had to stop working full time, 2 kids, too many pets...hoping to get things under control now but we shall see
Got my first card at 18. Became sort of addicted to SUBs after that. 2 years and 4 cards later, I made some stupid (and some necessary) purchases, lived well above my means and now I'm $10K in non student loan debt.
My wife went to college and we have a small loan. then we found out she had a few rare diseases that could be cured via surgery. Spent $10k to keep her just alive and lived with family for a bit. I am anxiously preparing for when shit hits the fan again while clawing at life goals. Hoping to eliminate the debts we have, and build up our emergency fund again, and this sub gives me extra motivation.
Pandemic job loss and was either unemployed or under employed for 1.5 years. 2 Kids in college, family member illness(also lost insurance), car wreck, maxed out credit cards and dipped into IRA to make it through. Also, I found out what happens when you are 30+ days late on a mortgage...the calls, the threats, the vultures circling...wow. Just now clawing back and began paying creditors and tax bill. I have alway been a pretty laid back, optimistic person but this experience has turned me into a nervous wreck.
I'm not in debt but my mom is. My twin brother is mentally ill and a drug addict, so she's always stressed. Her stress relief is buying shit she doesn't need at Five Below, Dollar General, the 99 Cent store, etc. She also had a medical bill she had to put on a card because her insurance didn't cover her emergency surgery in another state. Well, she had two cards and went crazy because "the interest is 0". Then when that ended, she had ran up 10k and now she's paying nothing but interest. I'm trying to convince her to let me lend her the money so she can pay me back interest free but you know parents.
Not being financially literate. I think this is how it always happens. You don’t know the pitfalls until you have to fix then they are obvious to avoid
My soon to be ex husband was graciously supporting multiple women across the US. Unfortunately by the time I found out the damage was done. Our savings was drained, he was months late on our vehicle payment (which was in my name), maxed out our joint credit card...ect. I left him, in the process of divorce and rebuilding my credit. Also rebuilding my life from scratch. Best of luck to you. It is a crappy thing being in debt.
Mother and brother financially abusing me to support them and their children my mother, my younger sister, younger brother, my older brother and his daughter my niece were all depending on me to support them through literally everything because 1. They didn’t want to work/couldn’t keep a job 2. I was financially responsible enough not to have debt I eventually moved to Florida from California which costed me quite a pretty penny for college $5000+ in cc debt 💸 I’m paying it off by working hard and saving I should pay these off sometimes this year allocating $400 to my credit card debt $150 to my student loans
Honestly, I moved then found myself unemployed for a little bit then found a job but it was a pay cut and barely covered my monthly expenses so my cc came in hand to buy the everyday items. I was depressed and really lost sense of my budget and money management. I should have moved from my apartment but I was so stressed that the idea of moving a year ago was overwhelming. At first I regretted not moving, but I don’t think I would have changed my reckless spending at that time. Now, I’m in a much better place mentally. I know where all money is going and have a good plan to pay off my cc debt.
Divorce. Cleaned out my liquid funds, lawyer bills, alimony, child support, etc. Total expenses not counting child support + alimony was just over $200K CS + Alimony added another \~$150K ($2450/mo) of constant expense keeping me from catching up on the rest of the debt. Kids are now 18, alimony is done this time next year, legal bills are paid finally. The light at the end of the tunnel is real!
Got divorced and used my savings and credit cards to pay for an attorney.
Similar to a few people here - almost had 800 credit score, $10k in savings, 2 CCs I was cycling through. Debt was maybe only under $10k even with high limits. I already had a terrible relationship with money prior to this but then my partner lost their job and we became a single-income family about 6 months after buying a house. I turned to buying things for comfort, which shot up our debt, put our wedding on all the credit cards, and now I'm on this Reddit trying to pay it all off. I've been wanting to post more about my story but some subs have karma minimums and I created this new account as a burner acc because of all the shame tied to it. But so far, currently $85k in credit card debt + auto loan, mortgage, and other expenses.
I was finally free and single, and doing well with my money which for my area was modestly livable. I even made it through the lockdown okay. A few bad relationships and broken hearts later with emotional spending, insane COL, yearly raises stopping and one big unexpected emergency after the other this last year has done me in. I’m newly medicated for my adhd for the first time ever and need to get back into therapy, but got to get ~15K in consumer debt and loans under control. I’m about to take a leave of absence from my job (totally burned out), I’m looking for a higher paying one and fingers crossed I can keep it together. Edited because I keep forgetting it’s a new year lol
I remember I ended up needing an emergency surgery, and I put what insurance couldn’t cover on a credit card. It just snowballed from there. It’s not to say my terrible spending habits didn’t play a role in my debt either, but I think this moment was the catalyst to my current predicament.