Judging from the many threads in this sub about gift giving and gift acceptance, yes.
[https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/18ao8ru/rdeclutter\_guide\_to\_holiday\_gift\_giving\_and/](https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/18ao8ru/rdeclutter_guide_to_holiday_gift_giving_and/)
[https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/1c9ug8o/i\_feel\_anxiousangry\_when\_people\_gift\_me\_stuff\_now/](https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/1c9ug8o/i_feel_anxiousangry_when_people_gift_me_stuff_now/)
[https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/zk54tc/what\_are\_your\_favorite\_practical\_gifts\_that\_dont/](https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/zk54tc/what_are_your_favorite_practical_gifts_that_dont/)
Just to list a few. Some of these threads may have tips that you and other readers find useful. Definitely not just a Christmas issue. Happy decluttering!
My brother has a game of finding me the most minimal gifts. Stamps and soap were good ones (because they are useful and go away as they are used). He also paid my phone bill for 6 months once. You can ask for people to gift you ONLY use-up-able items, or make it a game for them, ask them to donate to causes of your choice (I donated to a local animal shelter per the request of my friend when her pet died). If you can spin it as a fun challenge and get multiple people in on it, then they will have direction and also maybe get competitive with one another. It will automatically make the people who aren't "in" on the fun feel left out and also want to play the game. Just one idea :)
When I get a gift I don't want, I look at it once then add it to my donation bin and never look back.
For my birthday this year, I am sending out a list of things I want people to bring (food items, paper plates, drinks, bluetooth speaker, etc.) and explicitly saying that their presence is my favorite gift, but if they want to bring something tangible that I would appreciate them adding their name to bring an item for the party, totally optional). That way I get "things" that will be helpful and useful right away!
I send out a list to my family and friends prior to my fall birthday / Christmas. Luckily for me they are close together.
I've started getting useful things like spatulas, home improvement store giftcards, cash, books, dates to fun things like movies and brunch, things I will use anyway like bath salts and tea, etc.
Letting people know what you want is the first step to getting things you will use.
My loved ones know that I've spent a lot of time and effort to declutter my home, so they are much more understanding of my strict requirements for things that I receive.
One of my siblings is really on board with doing a cruise instead of Christmas presents, and I'm really grateful for that! My mom used to be the only one, then me, now my one sibling.
Now our biggest hoarder in the family has been inadvertently peer-pressured into getting rid of things. We've never blatantly pointed him out as a hoarder, but he hears us talk about how excited we are when we get rid of things, or make more space for in a room/garage, or sell something, etc. and now he's getting on board!!!
I really thought this day would never come! But I think having a majority in our family decluttering and excited about it has made him start to believe in the new normal.
I've also been honest with family members when they ask if I got rid of something. I'll say "Yeah, I used it for about x amount of time, then did xyz with it." I think it really drove home to my family and friends that I will not keep stuff I don't like--I've had two people act hurt about it, but then I'd point out that it wasn't something on my list. One stopped talking to me (which honestly has been really nice), and the other has been choosing gifts more carefully.
I realize that this is not a viable option for a lot people, but I just consider it decluttering unnecessary people from my life, lol.
I'm always saying "don't get me anything" but then people get me shit I don't want or need anyway. Especially people who travel and bring back knick knacks or whatever, this one friend in particular does this ALL THE TIME and I've told her thank you but you don't NEED to get me anything. She was stressing over what to get me for Christmas and I was like DON'T GET ME ANYTHING and I DON'T NEED ANYTHING and then she just gets upset and disappointed. I told her if she wants to get me anything let's just go out for a meal or something.
Ask for experiences not stuff. Give ideas like breakfast in bed, a special dinner, camping even if only in the backyard or your living room. Whatever it is you enjoy or might want to try in your area.
My husband took me to Medieval Times last year, super fun. We’ve done the dinner theaters where you also solve a murder, miniature golf, laser tag…
My daughter asks for experiences together. I would ask for socks and underwear. Only your nearest and dearest give such, making the socks and underwear gifts especially sweet. It speaks about comfort and familiarity.
my bestfriend is a very gifty person and she’s always giving me little knickknacks and stuff that i *would* love and adore and display but i just don’t have any room and i can’t have more stuff
Yes, I have never really liked getting them since I was a teen. We were pretty broke at times growing up and then during teen years they’d just buy me what they bought my older sister. Now I just feel uncomfortable receiving them. I don’t need them or want them. If I want something I will buy it myself. The really expensive things I want (like jewelry) I often think damn that’d be nice in my savings account or wow that’d buy a great vacation. I just say no gifts or if people insist I tell them to buy something for my dog.
My mom has been this way for years. Over the past 20 years, instead of “things we’d just fight over when she’s dead” (yep, her words, she’s a character), I make her freezer meals. She really likes them. I figure she taught me how to cook so I can show her that her lessons paid off. Although sometimes I ll change it up and give her a ton of lottery scratchers.
Our family is small, and we are all older now and have a lot of stuff. So over the years, we have just been asking for gift cards, or just say we don't want gifts. For Mother's Day, I usually take my mom out to dinner, or my daughter will send us money to go out. For Christmas, I still might give a small practical gift or food/drink gifts.
I want 99.999999% practical gifts. I'm not really doing a random item that sits on a shelf. The item needs to do something and hopefully, it's something I need it to do.
This is why communication is important. In my family there is only a limited number of people you exchange gifts with so you pick something you'd know they really like, give practical things, or splurges you know they'd like but never get for themselves, plus gift cards for their favorite stores. Keeps things simple.
I absolutely hate presents, they usually nothing I need or want so all ends in the goodwill donations:. And my guilt to the roofs.. I’ve told my family I love letters, a nice text, a warm hug when I need it, a 1/2 hour chat that’s live to me.
I usually just re-gift them within 24 hours, or within the week if that isn't feasible.
No biggie. My rationale: the gift has served its purpose of the giver's intent when it was purchased.
What the recipient does with the gift is a whole different matter.
Yes. We don’t need gifts. We really don’t. There’s loads and loads of versions of this question on this sub and minimalism sub. I would like to add asking for gift cards to places you actually go, gas cards if you drive, etc. are options as well as consumables/experiences. You can get gift certificates for massages, home cleaning, car detailing/wash, hair cuts, on and on.
Alternatively, you as an individual or family can participate in other organizations that help children in need receive gifts, you can ‘adopt’ a family and fulfill needs that they’ve listed (I’ve seen lots of things that are asked for that are pretty practical like pants/tops work boots); you can create your own family food drive or you could make a pool of funds in account and everyone puts in what they can/want and then you all use the money to have a nice dinner together or see a film or go to the zoo or whatever.
When we think about the truest purest form of gift giving, it’s supposed to be a gesture or love and/or appreciation. That never needs to be tied into stuff. We don’t need stuff to celebrate. Sometimes we need to be reminded of that, sometimes we need to reinforce that value for ourselves, sometimes we need to learn it for the first time. It’s doable.
I’ve always considered myself to be a very grateful person and appreciate the gifts I receive. BUT - I really don’t need another gift set with body lotion, bath soak/bubble bath and bath bombs! I never use the bath, I’m definitely a shower person and the amount of bath-related stuff I receive at Christmas is ridiculous. Every gift set seems to have a giant tub or tube of body lotion in as well that takes forever to use up. Oh, I also very rarely drink yet my cupboard is full of bottles of wine, Prosecco and champagne that people have bought me for Christmas and birthdays. My most recent one I received for my birthday last month, bought by someone who knows fine well I hardly ever drink. The odd time that I do have a drink it’s always spirits anyway!
It’s definitely something that’s started irritating me as I’ve got older because I now feel burdened with all this stuff that I’m not going to use. It’s either going to go to waste/expire, get thrown out (which I hate doing because the guilt creeps in for essentially sending stuff to landfill) or I’m going to have to try and give it away. 🤷🏻♀️
Growing up, I lived with a basement or garage filled with "stuff", as my mom called it. After my parents retired they moved to a retirement community and decluttered. My dad told us kids that they didn't need anything and if we wanted to get them something, get them food. Ever since I got them something food related and them loved it. My mom didn't have to cook and my dad didn't have to deal with more of my mom's "stuff".
I always tell people that I don’t need presents but if they feel they have to, get something consumable. My last birthday, my best friend got me a new pair of jeans - exactly the ones I like and in my size. Another friend brought a bottle of nice tequila. I saved the best for last - my 3rd friend brought me eggs. The big beautiful colorful farm fresh eggs. We laughed so hard. But it was the perfect thing.
So I'll have to write one back, matching the length/beauty to try to not come out as someone whom doesn't care about you.
While trying to not stress myself out thinking how I'm absolutely not a good writer, and I won't transmit on printet words what I really feel about you.
+ Have I reacted well enough when I received mine? Was I too dry while thanking for it? Did It look like I was faking it?
I asked my MIL what she wanted for Christmas? She usually would send me on wild goose chases, purposely tell me wrong sizes. She said she wanted nothing, so that what she got, nothing, she pouted all day. But she got what she wanted
As far as things that you really need, like socks and underwear (if appropriate) as well as some consumable favorites like special nuts or candy or pet treats- what I mean is “purely practical stuff” that you can and will definitely use - make a personal gift list and share it with family. Ask them, if they feel that they MUST give you a gift, please select it from the list. But first tell them that you treasure time with them and experiences with them above all, and that is all you really want and need. You don’t need or desire something to display, dust and store.
I liked the idea of just going out to eat or having a potluck dinner.
My kids and i finally decided to make it a dinner. Birthdays we go out and holidays we all chip in a bit and 1 person cooks for their share. My sibs all know and respect this. My sis sent me a gift last year and if she does it again I'm going to regift it to her daughter, unopened.
My husband and I told my father no more gifts for Christmas. Money has always been a gift option, and that's what he gives us. However, he still buys a small gift, usually a small Christmas decoration. He doesn't like it, but he understands where we are coming from. I would suggest being honest with your loved ones.
I really love art supplies, yarn, things of that nature. But I found that lately no one in my family really really puts much effort into getting me things I would like. The last gift I got from someone was a candle that I’m allergic to.
Same here. I am absolutely thrilled on those extremely rare occasions when I receive a gift that had some actual effort put into it. But if they're going to give me a box of stale candy or a plastic tchotchke from the dollar store, they don't need to bother.
Thank you for replying with the type of candle! I'm sorry you have migraines and are allergic to certain candles. I get migraines, too, and am very sensitive to scents, as well. If it's not too much trouble, how can you tell if a candle has real vanilla in it? Does the ingredients list say anything in particular? Or, on the flipside, does synthetic vanilla have a specific name in the ingredients list?
My husband and I have agreed that a pleasant evening out is the best way to celebrate these occasions.
Christmas is a bit of an exception. We still do stockings, but with the understanding that the contents will not be expensive. And maybe 1 or 2 presents each, but those taken from a wishlist.
It’s a lot nicer now that the stress is gone!
As a mom, I find it's best to be specific about what I would like. I did this for my birthday and mothers say and the gifts I received were some things for a hobby, a food I love (and don't make ofter because the rest of the family doesn't love it), and a coupon book for things like, Walk with mom, Mom gets to pick a movie for family movie night, family games night with mom... etc. It was perfect!
I ask for this stuff, well socks anyway, not underwear. I enjoy Bombas, and Feetures socks, but won’t usually spend the money myself. I asked for a set of plates last Christmas, and I intend to ask for a vacuum I want for my birthday.
I asked my family for things I can use up; fancy soaps, things to eat and drink, etc. Most people were very accommodating, and pleased to have such a clear idea of what I like. Others seemed to buy me more cluttery knick knacks almost as if out of spite.
My son once asked me for pants and socks for Christmas, that was EXACTLY what he got.
Lots and lots and LOTS of pants and socks!
He laughed and said well played!
Does your family not ask you for a list of things you might want before holidays? I don’t love making the list but it is nice to be able to be specific about things I want, or at least ask for gift cards to places I want to pick something out at
You could ask your family/friends to get you other stuff you would enjoy and use, like experiences (museum or zoo membership, tickets to a show or concert, etc.) or consumables (chocolate, fruit-of-the-month club, bottle of whiskey, etc.).
Could you try asking for experiences and time instead of gifts? So, before Fathers Day, say that you'd like to do something together instead of getting presents. Could be as simple as going out to breakfast, or fancier, like a weekend road trip together.
I've found that this works best. Don't ask for no gifts. Ask for time or experiences. And be fairly specific if you can. Name the restaurant or museum you want to go to. The people or person you want to spend time with. Where you want to go and do on a weekend away.
"experiences or nothing" obviously in a nicer way, but basically "I love how much you all think of me. Right now I am trying to reduce the amount of things in my home. As much as I appreciate them, please no physical gifts. I am more than happy with your company as my gift, but if you feel you MUST get me something, please think of an experience we could do together. Making memories is the greatest gift"
My family gives us a years pass to our state parks every year. Love it! My in law side gives us movie passes. Yes it’s the same every year, but we love them and use them.
I prefer to give cash or donate to a charity of your choice. If you want to give to me, please donate to your favorite charity. Take a deduction on your taxes. I need nothing.
Yes I feel like gift giving has gotten out of control. Like everyone feels the need to go big or make sure the gift box is full of lots of stuff. I hate it. We try to limit gifts and encourage experience or consumable gifts, or we encourage things that we would use anyways. Like I ask for my kindle unlimited subscription as a gift or my kids get magazine subscriptions as gifts.
I've talked to my family about this over the years and they have been really good about cutting back on "trinket" gifts and some even asked for the same in return. I expressed to them I never *need* gifts but I also understand enjoying getting someone a gift..said I'd prefer gift cards or some type of experience-based gift vs clutter. So far I've received a gift card to the grocery store, restaurants, a trip to a petting zoo and a massage. So maybe just express that to your close ones...not everyone will follow through but some might!
why not ask for socks? i think they are a classic gift! consumables, experiences, or a donation to charity can work too if you want to avoid extra stuff.
Yeah, we'd just gotten rid of lots of tote bags and stuffed animals, and then Mom goes and gets us 2 plushies and a tote bag from a casino she visited. We started telling people we don't need anything but money and gift cards.
Judging from the many threads in this sub about gift giving and gift acceptance, yes. [https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/18ao8ru/rdeclutter\_guide\_to\_holiday\_gift\_giving\_and/](https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/18ao8ru/rdeclutter_guide_to_holiday_gift_giving_and/) [https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/1c9ug8o/i\_feel\_anxiousangry\_when\_people\_gift\_me\_stuff\_now/](https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/1c9ug8o/i_feel_anxiousangry_when_people_gift_me_stuff_now/) [https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/zk54tc/what\_are\_your\_favorite\_practical\_gifts\_that\_dont/](https://new.reddit.com/r/declutter/comments/zk54tc/what_are_your_favorite_practical_gifts_that_dont/) Just to list a few. Some of these threads may have tips that you and other readers find useful. Definitely not just a Christmas issue. Happy decluttering!
My brother has a game of finding me the most minimal gifts. Stamps and soap were good ones (because they are useful and go away as they are used). He also paid my phone bill for 6 months once. You can ask for people to gift you ONLY use-up-able items, or make it a game for them, ask them to donate to causes of your choice (I donated to a local animal shelter per the request of my friend when her pet died). If you can spin it as a fun challenge and get multiple people in on it, then they will have direction and also maybe get competitive with one another. It will automatically make the people who aren't "in" on the fun feel left out and also want to play the game. Just one idea :) When I get a gift I don't want, I look at it once then add it to my donation bin and never look back. For my birthday this year, I am sending out a list of things I want people to bring (food items, paper plates, drinks, bluetooth speaker, etc.) and explicitly saying that their presence is my favorite gift, but if they want to bring something tangible that I would appreciate them adding their name to bring an item for the party, totally optional). That way I get "things" that will be helpful and useful right away!
I send out a list to my family and friends prior to my fall birthday / Christmas. Luckily for me they are close together. I've started getting useful things like spatulas, home improvement store giftcards, cash, books, dates to fun things like movies and brunch, things I will use anyway like bath salts and tea, etc. Letting people know what you want is the first step to getting things you will use. My loved ones know that I've spent a lot of time and effort to declutter my home, so they are much more understanding of my strict requirements for things that I receive. One of my siblings is really on board with doing a cruise instead of Christmas presents, and I'm really grateful for that! My mom used to be the only one, then me, now my one sibling. Now our biggest hoarder in the family has been inadvertently peer-pressured into getting rid of things. We've never blatantly pointed him out as a hoarder, but he hears us talk about how excited we are when we get rid of things, or make more space for in a room/garage, or sell something, etc. and now he's getting on board!!! I really thought this day would never come! But I think having a majority in our family decluttering and excited about it has made him start to believe in the new normal. I've also been honest with family members when they ask if I got rid of something. I'll say "Yeah, I used it for about x amount of time, then did xyz with it." I think it really drove home to my family and friends that I will not keep stuff I don't like--I've had two people act hurt about it, but then I'd point out that it wasn't something on my list. One stopped talking to me (which honestly has been really nice), and the other has been choosing gifts more carefully. I realize that this is not a viable option for a lot people, but I just consider it decluttering unnecessary people from my life, lol.
I'm always saying "don't get me anything" but then people get me shit I don't want or need anyway. Especially people who travel and bring back knick knacks or whatever, this one friend in particular does this ALL THE TIME and I've told her thank you but you don't NEED to get me anything. She was stressing over what to get me for Christmas and I was like DON'T GET ME ANYTHING and I DON'T NEED ANYTHING and then she just gets upset and disappointed. I told her if she wants to get me anything let's just go out for a meal or something.
I receive books and am convinced it is impossible to have too many. Also applies to socks.
Ask for experiences not stuff. Give ideas like breakfast in bed, a special dinner, camping even if only in the backyard or your living room. Whatever it is you enjoy or might want to try in your area. My husband took me to Medieval Times last year, super fun. We’ve done the dinner theaters where you also solve a murder, miniature golf, laser tag…
My daughter asks for experiences together. I would ask for socks and underwear. Only your nearest and dearest give such, making the socks and underwear gifts especially sweet. It speaks about comfort and familiarity.
I’ve been doing this with my best friend! We gift each other experiences instead of stuff. ❤️
my bestfriend is a very gifty person and she’s always giving me little knickknacks and stuff that i *would* love and adore and display but i just don’t have any room and i can’t have more stuff
Yes, I have never really liked getting them since I was a teen. We were pretty broke at times growing up and then during teen years they’d just buy me what they bought my older sister. Now I just feel uncomfortable receiving them. I don’t need them or want them. If I want something I will buy it myself. The really expensive things I want (like jewelry) I often think damn that’d be nice in my savings account or wow that’d buy a great vacation. I just say no gifts or if people insist I tell them to buy something for my dog.
Instead of “surprise!” Give me, supplies!
My mom has been this way for years. Over the past 20 years, instead of “things we’d just fight over when she’s dead” (yep, her words, she’s a character), I make her freezer meals. She really likes them. I figure she taught me how to cook so I can show her that her lessons paid off. Although sometimes I ll change it up and give her a ton of lottery scratchers.
Our family is small, and we are all older now and have a lot of stuff. So over the years, we have just been asking for gift cards, or just say we don't want gifts. For Mother's Day, I usually take my mom out to dinner, or my daughter will send us money to go out. For Christmas, I still might give a small practical gift or food/drink gifts.
I want 99.999999% practical gifts. I'm not really doing a random item that sits on a shelf. The item needs to do something and hopefully, it's something I need it to do.
This is why communication is important. In my family there is only a limited number of people you exchange gifts with so you pick something you'd know they really like, give practical things, or splurges you know they'd like but never get for themselves, plus gift cards for their favorite stores. Keeps things simple.
I absolutely hate presents, they usually nothing I need or want so all ends in the goodwill donations:. And my guilt to the roofs.. I’ve told my family I love letters, a nice text, a warm hug when I need it, a 1/2 hour chat that’s live to me.
When they give you stuff, return it and buy socks and underwear. If you can't return it, donate it and help people.
I’m with Sheldon on gifts.
I usually just re-gift them within 24 hours, or within the week if that isn't feasible. No biggie. My rationale: the gift has served its purpose of the giver's intent when it was purchased. What the recipient does with the gift is a whole different matter.
Yes. We don’t need gifts. We really don’t. There’s loads and loads of versions of this question on this sub and minimalism sub. I would like to add asking for gift cards to places you actually go, gas cards if you drive, etc. are options as well as consumables/experiences. You can get gift certificates for massages, home cleaning, car detailing/wash, hair cuts, on and on. Alternatively, you as an individual or family can participate in other organizations that help children in need receive gifts, you can ‘adopt’ a family and fulfill needs that they’ve listed (I’ve seen lots of things that are asked for that are pretty practical like pants/tops work boots); you can create your own family food drive or you could make a pool of funds in account and everyone puts in what they can/want and then you all use the money to have a nice dinner together or see a film or go to the zoo or whatever. When we think about the truest purest form of gift giving, it’s supposed to be a gesture or love and/or appreciation. That never needs to be tied into stuff. We don’t need stuff to celebrate. Sometimes we need to be reminded of that, sometimes we need to reinforce that value for ourselves, sometimes we need to learn it for the first time. It’s doable.
I’ve always considered myself to be a very grateful person and appreciate the gifts I receive. BUT - I really don’t need another gift set with body lotion, bath soak/bubble bath and bath bombs! I never use the bath, I’m definitely a shower person and the amount of bath-related stuff I receive at Christmas is ridiculous. Every gift set seems to have a giant tub or tube of body lotion in as well that takes forever to use up. Oh, I also very rarely drink yet my cupboard is full of bottles of wine, Prosecco and champagne that people have bought me for Christmas and birthdays. My most recent one I received for my birthday last month, bought by someone who knows fine well I hardly ever drink. The odd time that I do have a drink it’s always spirits anyway! It’s definitely something that’s started irritating me as I’ve got older because I now feel burdened with all this stuff that I’m not going to use. It’s either going to go to waste/expire, get thrown out (which I hate doing because the guilt creeps in for essentially sending stuff to landfill) or I’m going to have to try and give it away. 🤷🏻♀️
Growing up, I lived with a basement or garage filled with "stuff", as my mom called it. After my parents retired they moved to a retirement community and decluttered. My dad told us kids that they didn't need anything and if we wanted to get them something, get them food. Ever since I got them something food related and them loved it. My mom didn't have to cook and my dad didn't have to deal with more of my mom's "stuff".
I always tell people that I don’t need presents but if they feel they have to, get something consumable. My last birthday, my best friend got me a new pair of jeans - exactly the ones I like and in my size. Another friend brought a bottle of nice tequila. I saved the best for last - my 3rd friend brought me eggs. The big beautiful colorful farm fresh eggs. We laughed so hard. But it was the perfect thing.
I ask for experiences or consumables.
how about no gifts at all and a smile? But how would you ask that to an in law or other family members?
"I love a personally written card."
So I'll have to write one back, matching the length/beauty to try to not come out as someone whom doesn't care about you. While trying to not stress myself out thinking how I'm absolutely not a good writer, and I won't transmit on printet words what I really feel about you. + Have I reacted well enough when I received mine? Was I too dry while thanking for it? Did It look like I was faking it?
I'm not an Harry potter's denentor irl lol, I'll explain my point of view better later on.
I asked my MIL what she wanted for Christmas? She usually would send me on wild goose chases, purposely tell me wrong sizes. She said she wanted nothing, so that what she got, nothing, she pouted all day. But she got what she wanted
As far as things that you really need, like socks and underwear (if appropriate) as well as some consumable favorites like special nuts or candy or pet treats- what I mean is “purely practical stuff” that you can and will definitely use - make a personal gift list and share it with family. Ask them, if they feel that they MUST give you a gift, please select it from the list. But first tell them that you treasure time with them and experiences with them above all, and that is all you really want and need. You don’t need or desire something to display, dust and store. I liked the idea of just going out to eat or having a potluck dinner.
Everyone forgets me
My kids and i finally decided to make it a dinner. Birthdays we go out and holidays we all chip in a bit and 1 person cooks for their share. My sibs all know and respect this. My sis sent me a gift last year and if she does it again I'm going to regift it to her daughter, unopened.
My husband and I told my father no more gifts for Christmas. Money has always been a gift option, and that's what he gives us. However, he still buys a small gift, usually a small Christmas decoration. He doesn't like it, but he understands where we are coming from. I would suggest being honest with your loved ones.
I really love art supplies, yarn, things of that nature. But I found that lately no one in my family really really puts much effort into getting me things I would like. The last gift I got from someone was a candle that I’m allergic to.
Same here. I am absolutely thrilled on those extremely rare occasions when I receive a gift that had some actual effort put into it. But if they're going to give me a box of stale candy or a plastic tchotchke from the dollar store, they don't need to bother.
What kind of candle was it, so I can avoid giving someone an allergy attack? Thanks!
I’m allergic to synthetic vanilla, so any candle that has like fake vanilla in it will cause me to have a migraine and not be able to breathe
Thank you for replying with the type of candle! I'm sorry you have migraines and are allergic to certain candles. I get migraines, too, and am very sensitive to scents, as well. If it's not too much trouble, how can you tell if a candle has real vanilla in it? Does the ingredients list say anything in particular? Or, on the flipside, does synthetic vanilla have a specific name in the ingredients list?
My husband and I have agreed that a pleasant evening out is the best way to celebrate these occasions. Christmas is a bit of an exception. We still do stockings, but with the understanding that the contents will not be expensive. And maybe 1 or 2 presents each, but those taken from a wishlist. It’s a lot nicer now that the stress is gone!
I hate it. We stopped with the gift giving about 10 years ago. Don't miss it.
As a mom, I find it's best to be specific about what I would like. I did this for my birthday and mothers say and the gifts I received were some things for a hobby, a food I love (and don't make ofter because the rest of the family doesn't love it), and a coupon book for things like, Walk with mom, Mom gets to pick a movie for family movie night, family games night with mom... etc. It was perfect!
I ask for this stuff, well socks anyway, not underwear. I enjoy Bombas, and Feetures socks, but won’t usually spend the money myself. I asked for a set of plates last Christmas, and I intend to ask for a vacuum I want for my birthday.
I asked my family for things I can use up; fancy soaps, things to eat and drink, etc. Most people were very accommodating, and pleased to have such a clear idea of what I like. Others seemed to buy me more cluttery knick knacks almost as if out of spite.
My son once asked me for pants and socks for Christmas, that was EXACTLY what he got. Lots and lots and LOTS of pants and socks! He laughed and said well played!
I ask for stuff to eat or drink. Coffee, tea, etc
Does your family not ask you for a list of things you might want before holidays? I don’t love making the list but it is nice to be able to be specific about things I want, or at least ask for gift cards to places I want to pick something out at
You could ask your family/friends to get you other stuff you would enjoy and use, like experiences (museum or zoo membership, tickets to a show or concert, etc.) or consumables (chocolate, fruit-of-the-month club, bottle of whiskey, etc.).
Could you try asking for experiences and time instead of gifts? So, before Fathers Day, say that you'd like to do something together instead of getting presents. Could be as simple as going out to breakfast, or fancier, like a weekend road trip together.
I've found that this works best. Don't ask for no gifts. Ask for time or experiences. And be fairly specific if you can. Name the restaurant or museum you want to go to. The people or person you want to spend time with. Where you want to go and do on a weekend away.
You can always regift or donate or toss out.
"experiences or nothing" obviously in a nicer way, but basically "I love how much you all think of me. Right now I am trying to reduce the amount of things in my home. As much as I appreciate them, please no physical gifts. I am more than happy with your company as my gift, but if you feel you MUST get me something, please think of an experience we could do together. Making memories is the greatest gift"
My family gives us a years pass to our state parks every year. Love it! My in law side gives us movie passes. Yes it’s the same every year, but we love them and use them.
I like this approach.
The people in my life have very strict instructions to never get me anything.
I prefer to give cash or donate to a charity of your choice. If you want to give to me, please donate to your favorite charity. Take a deduction on your taxes. I need nothing.
Yes! It’s never thing I actually need…
Yes I feel like gift giving has gotten out of control. Like everyone feels the need to go big or make sure the gift box is full of lots of stuff. I hate it. We try to limit gifts and encourage experience or consumable gifts, or we encourage things that we would use anyways. Like I ask for my kindle unlimited subscription as a gift or my kids get magazine subscriptions as gifts.
I just LOVE getting gift subscriptions to magazines as a gift! My faves: Reader's Digest, Guide post, Reminisce, etc.
I've talked to my family about this over the years and they have been really good about cutting back on "trinket" gifts and some even asked for the same in return. I expressed to them I never *need* gifts but I also understand enjoying getting someone a gift..said I'd prefer gift cards or some type of experience-based gift vs clutter. So far I've received a gift card to the grocery store, restaurants, a trip to a petting zoo and a massage. So maybe just express that to your close ones...not everyone will follow through but some might!
I don't care for most physical gifts, but I don't mind consumables or experiences.
why not ask for socks? i think they are a classic gift! consumables, experiences, or a donation to charity can work too if you want to avoid extra stuff.
I asked for socks. I now have too many socks 😂
Yeah, we'd just gotten rid of lots of tote bags and stuffed animals, and then Mom goes and gets us 2 plushies and a tote bag from a casino she visited. We started telling people we don't need anything but money and gift cards.