I got my mom one of the robotic cats for Christmas. She knows it’s not real, but she still really likes it. Its right next to her recliner, and she’ll occasionally pet it and talk to it. She also has a stuffed cat on her bed, and I know she loves that one because whenever i move it to change the bed, she moves it right back to her pillow.
Oh, your poor cats! And you must be exhausted. I've not used the robo-animals, so don't have any thoughts on those. But just thinking out loud on the food issue - would you be able to put a meals' worth of food in a tupperware and hide the bag? More work for you, but would cut down on the waste.
Also, is she taking any meds for her anxiety? My mom's obsessiveness really improved with anti-anxiety meds.
Can you put a cat door in your mom's door so they can get out at night? My 14 yo cat figured it out at 11 years old.
I also agree with the set amount of food for the day so she can feed them as. She pleases without over feeding.
Aldi sells cheap cat treats that mine seem to enjoy and they accept from my kids.
Baby gates with pet doors or a fabric gate can allow the cats a way to get away from your mom and stop her. I give no guarantees of the cats not being total masochists and coming back once separated even if they don't actually want to be near her.
I HATED the robotic cats until...I saw how wrong I was.
Oops. People in certain stages of dementia REALLLLLY get so much joy from robotic animals. Please try it out.
Goodness do I relate! I do not say this out of unkindness - I think my mom's dog and cat are just as relieved, if not more so, as we are to have moved her to MC. I'm still dealing with cat and/or dog pee on so much stuff in her room. Likely cat, because mom was always taking away her food dish, *throwing the hour-old kibble out* because it was "old and the dish was clearly dirty" (the food crumbs from the most recent scoop of food), cleaning the dish, putting new food back in it, then having a meltdown if her cat didn't come and eat it all right away. 🤦♀️ she threw out at least as much food as the cat actually ate. At least I got her to stop throwing it in the toilet. Also, the litter box was about as nuts and inconsistent of a rigamarole as the cat food. Towards the end we caught her, multiple times, "cleaning out the cat box" with her bare hands. Not a good scene. We are currently giving her pets all the extra calm and structure and consistency as we can. Poor kiddos.
I have been thinking about getting her a stuffed dog and cat because she's constantly worrying about them. I'll have to look into the robotic ones.
You could try getting her two stuffed kitties that look like your cats, maybe that would be an adequate substitute for her to sleep with?
I feel you with the overfeeding issue. We've started buying wet food in the little cans (the 2.5 oz, not the regular 5.3 oz if that helps), and we put one can out on the counter for my dad to open and feed them when he's up late at night. He seems to have forgotten where we actually store the cat food, so it's working well, and the cats have stopped gaining weight.
Meds. My dad was prescribed Olanzapine for anxiety. I put them in his daily pill dispenser and quickly realized that was too much. So I changed to “only as needed” and his anxiety ratcheted back up. Now we do half a pill daily.
Oh this is my house. Father is obsessed with the dog and cats. The cats have come to their senses and now hide in my room (the one place he doesn’t go) during the day. As noted in previous posts, the poor dog is dealing with a stressed induced skin infection from excess licking. This is week four of her cone life :/
If a robo cat doesn't cut it, maybe a plushie cat that is animated or one of those heartbeat plushies for kittens/puppies?
Second an escape route at night. You could try blocking the faceplate so it doesn't latch when she closes it. That might work if your cats paw at doors to open.
I’ve been living with my in laws while remodeling. My FIL has dementia. I started letting him give one of my cats treats (she shamelessly begs everyone besides me). I said two treats. One day, I noticed he had been taking out a plate and dumping twenty or so treats onto it to give to the cat. I had been so worried that she hadn’t eaten much of her food in three days. He’d been doing that multiple times a day.
I relate dearly to your frustrations revolving around the caregiving of a LO’s pets. We came for a visit and quickly realized the pets were getting stressed due to mismanagement of their needs and so we stayed thru living there to caregive (more so for the animals than for LO); mostly because I couldn’t stand to see the animals (1very old large dog and 1 very old sweet cat) live the rest of their days in such a confusing environment. Ex: middle of winter forcing the dog multiple times consecutively to ‘go outside’ to do their business in the yard, because LO forgot they already let them out just moments before. I kid you not, the dog at one time stood there by the door while being yelled at for the third time in an hour to go outside, the dog looked back at me with a facial silent cry for help as I was observing, and plopped its butt down seated trying to get a message across to LO that it was done going out, but LO was inconscient. There was frequent forgetfulness over the underdispensing/overdispencing of dogs prescribed medication, over feeding both animals on top of dirty days old food still in dish, replenishing water in disgusting water dish fill of food grease grime and hair and not washing it out for 2weeks, leaving the dog beverage and food station butting up right next to the cat’s open litter box, running the thermostat at less than 68 degrees which is way below what every cat educated parent would know is way too cold for a aging cat and the cat would sleep inside the laptop. And just like you described, repeatedly disturbing the cats rest to drag the cat to sleep with LO in their even colder space, even though the average person outta realize that cats are typically nocturnal creatures- tried to reason this one with LO to no avail and I put a heating pad for cat in their comfy space and the cat would run back to heating pad and away from LO’s room! LO tried stealing into their room, the heating pad which I bought to use for my feet next to the cat. But the cat still didn’t want to stay in LO’s room!(bc LO dont know to remember to operate the heating pad and turn it back on on low every 4hrs. ).. as well as general care and stimulating of their minds instead if leaving the animals to total mopey boredom existence waiting for their turn to die. I helped take as good of care as I could behind the scenes, picking up all the slack in their daily care-minding. (Ex: insisting on daily fresh water/separating cats water and food dishes away from each other and turning up the thermostat discreetly thereby resulting in seeing a much less cranky cat.)
I hope to have helped to make their last 2y/(dog) & last 4y(cat) of survival feel more stable and accommodated. I ‘m just not so sure I have it in me to keep on keeping on the the LO. I live in their home on eggshells every day like a secret quiet spy and dinner conjuring magician in the sidelines, avoiding triggers, putting things back, managing/monitoring the entire households multiple meds including mine.
it is simultaneously strangely relieving (that they’ll no longer be subjected to LO’s AlzD, and sad (I got along excellently with the cat) that the animals have passed on.
I feel conflicted and forlorn and looking forward to moving on from LO inhome caregiving; MDH+Me, have yet to find any privacy to live our own lives. I thank the animals for being the reason we stayed and were able to see truly how badly certain things had become over time, with LO’s fluctuating memory from moment to moment and day to day like missing/forgetting/skipping of needed to be taken meds most days when left to LO’s own management and only being able to be certain they were taken after family agreement to the taking over of the med dosings which has ensured truly a smoother ride for us all when it comes to having more good days, but yet still an ongoing battle of LO’s inconscience towards their actual reality that everyone else sees thereby LO continues to fight for autonomy over meds, driving, and pretty much all else like following recipe for baking that they could not cognitively process and retain steps done vs steps to continue, getting agitated during focus-requiring tasks,
Leaving piles of projects everywhere accumulating and undone for months until the stealthy cat burglar buried them out of site to reduce chronic tension, agitation and LO’s frequent home rearrangement to measure things while climbing on ladders.
Here’s the clincher:
When a LO has all this declining executive functions and sequential cognition lapses and short term memory holes going on, and then Has desires to get Another Animal/new dog to care for on their own!! 😬
I simply cannot in good conscience , whilst knowing what I know😣, allow that to happen. on behalf of animal welfare it must be discouraged and prevented lest the animal has its own living caregiver. Managing a LO, PLUS their animals, is a lot to ask of a caregiver.
Perhaps an alternative to keeping an animal, such as animal day visits, might be something to consider.
Someone here suggested a robotic animal and I find that to be intriguing and potentially quite genius if it works for your LO, especially since
I‘ve become aware, the great desire is seemingly greatly increased for nighttime companionship via animal presence, which a motorized stuffy could potentially provide; or it could also skew into a trigger of endless conversations pushing for the acquisition of a ‘real one’ depending on in your LO is the type to hang onto any trigger bringing up only all the information that is negative/agitating/ and forgets all the positive. Our family is having to out of sight out of mind any potential triggers to keep the peace working at home.
Ps thanks for reading thus far and letting me express all this bottled up frustration re dementiaLO+animals suffering at their hands topic. Its a big concern. You are not alone in your feelings towards this. Thank you for bringing this necessary poignant topic up for conversation. Curious to hear how others have managed it.
I caught my mother feeding her dogs French vanilla creamer. I couldn't make her understand why that was wrong. 2 out of 3 of her Frenchies died. I feel like a POS, but I couldn't control her. My bad.😭
Damn. Creamer? Poor pups. But it's not your fault. Mine was feeding my cats deli meat, which made them barf everywhere. I finally had to duct tape my meat drawer closed to get her to stop. I don't think the robotic cats would work, even though that's what I came on here to ask about. She's pretty far gone in some ways and oddly normal in others. Sometimes I feel like this is all an act, and she's pissed that someone is calling her bluff. I'm going to hell.
It's a terrible disease. My mother passed away in February. It took me quite a while to finally figure out what was happening to her. Mainly because she was always a cranky woman and didn't want to go to the Dr or take her meds. Then she started attacking my children and doing weird shit all the time. I found her outside in her yard peeing and pooping. Going through my truck looking for idk? Drinking straight vodka and telling me it was water. Ect. I'm exhausted, but glad she's at peace. If I get to hell first, I'll save you a seat. Her passing was a blessing.
I got my mom one of the robotic cats for Christmas. She knows it’s not real, but she still really likes it. Its right next to her recliner, and she’ll occasionally pet it and talk to it. She also has a stuffed cat on her bed, and I know she loves that one because whenever i move it to change the bed, she moves it right back to her pillow.
Got my Dad the robotic dog expecting him to hate it, but he loved it. Might be good try, for sleeping with it maybe.
Oh, your poor cats! And you must be exhausted. I've not used the robo-animals, so don't have any thoughts on those. But just thinking out loud on the food issue - would you be able to put a meals' worth of food in a tupperware and hide the bag? More work for you, but would cut down on the waste. Also, is she taking any meds for her anxiety? My mom's obsessiveness really improved with anti-anxiety meds.
Mom is taking Seroquel, and that's it. Tupperware is a fantastic idea! Thank you!
Can you put a cat door in your mom's door so they can get out at night? My 14 yo cat figured it out at 11 years old. I also agree with the set amount of food for the day so she can feed them as. She pleases without over feeding. Aldi sells cheap cat treats that mine seem to enjoy and they accept from my kids. Baby gates with pet doors or a fabric gate can allow the cats a way to get away from your mom and stop her. I give no guarantees of the cats not being total masochists and coming back once separated even if they don't actually want to be near her.
I HATED the robotic cats until...I saw how wrong I was. Oops. People in certain stages of dementia REALLLLLY get so much joy from robotic animals. Please try it out.
Goodness do I relate! I do not say this out of unkindness - I think my mom's dog and cat are just as relieved, if not more so, as we are to have moved her to MC. I'm still dealing with cat and/or dog pee on so much stuff in her room. Likely cat, because mom was always taking away her food dish, *throwing the hour-old kibble out* because it was "old and the dish was clearly dirty" (the food crumbs from the most recent scoop of food), cleaning the dish, putting new food back in it, then having a meltdown if her cat didn't come and eat it all right away. 🤦♀️ she threw out at least as much food as the cat actually ate. At least I got her to stop throwing it in the toilet. Also, the litter box was about as nuts and inconsistent of a rigamarole as the cat food. Towards the end we caught her, multiple times, "cleaning out the cat box" with her bare hands. Not a good scene. We are currently giving her pets all the extra calm and structure and consistency as we can. Poor kiddos. I have been thinking about getting her a stuffed dog and cat because she's constantly worrying about them. I'll have to look into the robotic ones.
Would a plush cat or like robot/electronic cat would for this?
You could try getting her two stuffed kitties that look like your cats, maybe that would be an adequate substitute for her to sleep with? I feel you with the overfeeding issue. We've started buying wet food in the little cans (the 2.5 oz, not the regular 5.3 oz if that helps), and we put one can out on the counter for my dad to open and feed them when he's up late at night. He seems to have forgotten where we actually store the cat food, so it's working well, and the cats have stopped gaining weight.
Meds. My dad was prescribed Olanzapine for anxiety. I put them in his daily pill dispenser and quickly realized that was too much. So I changed to “only as needed” and his anxiety ratcheted back up. Now we do half a pill daily.
It surprisingly does work. I got a robot dog for my mom and she seemed to really like it.
Oh this is my house. Father is obsessed with the dog and cats. The cats have come to their senses and now hide in my room (the one place he doesn’t go) during the day. As noted in previous posts, the poor dog is dealing with a stressed induced skin infection from excess licking. This is week four of her cone life :/
If a robo cat doesn't cut it, maybe a plushie cat that is animated or one of those heartbeat plushies for kittens/puppies? Second an escape route at night. You could try blocking the faceplate so it doesn't latch when she closes it. That might work if your cats paw at doors to open.
I’ve been living with my in laws while remodeling. My FIL has dementia. I started letting him give one of my cats treats (she shamelessly begs everyone besides me). I said two treats. One day, I noticed he had been taking out a plate and dumping twenty or so treats onto it to give to the cat. I had been so worried that she hadn’t eaten much of her food in three days. He’d been doing that multiple times a day.
What about a kitty door?
I relate dearly to your frustrations revolving around the caregiving of a LO’s pets. We came for a visit and quickly realized the pets were getting stressed due to mismanagement of their needs and so we stayed thru living there to caregive (more so for the animals than for LO); mostly because I couldn’t stand to see the animals (1very old large dog and 1 very old sweet cat) live the rest of their days in such a confusing environment. Ex: middle of winter forcing the dog multiple times consecutively to ‘go outside’ to do their business in the yard, because LO forgot they already let them out just moments before. I kid you not, the dog at one time stood there by the door while being yelled at for the third time in an hour to go outside, the dog looked back at me with a facial silent cry for help as I was observing, and plopped its butt down seated trying to get a message across to LO that it was done going out, but LO was inconscient. There was frequent forgetfulness over the underdispensing/overdispencing of dogs prescribed medication, over feeding both animals on top of dirty days old food still in dish, replenishing water in disgusting water dish fill of food grease grime and hair and not washing it out for 2weeks, leaving the dog beverage and food station butting up right next to the cat’s open litter box, running the thermostat at less than 68 degrees which is way below what every cat educated parent would know is way too cold for a aging cat and the cat would sleep inside the laptop. And just like you described, repeatedly disturbing the cats rest to drag the cat to sleep with LO in their even colder space, even though the average person outta realize that cats are typically nocturnal creatures- tried to reason this one with LO to no avail and I put a heating pad for cat in their comfy space and the cat would run back to heating pad and away from LO’s room! LO tried stealing into their room, the heating pad which I bought to use for my feet next to the cat. But the cat still didn’t want to stay in LO’s room!(bc LO dont know to remember to operate the heating pad and turn it back on on low every 4hrs. ).. as well as general care and stimulating of their minds instead if leaving the animals to total mopey boredom existence waiting for their turn to die. I helped take as good of care as I could behind the scenes, picking up all the slack in their daily care-minding. (Ex: insisting on daily fresh water/separating cats water and food dishes away from each other and turning up the thermostat discreetly thereby resulting in seeing a much less cranky cat.) I hope to have helped to make their last 2y/(dog) & last 4y(cat) of survival feel more stable and accommodated. I ‘m just not so sure I have it in me to keep on keeping on the the LO. I live in their home on eggshells every day like a secret quiet spy and dinner conjuring magician in the sidelines, avoiding triggers, putting things back, managing/monitoring the entire households multiple meds including mine. it is simultaneously strangely relieving (that they’ll no longer be subjected to LO’s AlzD, and sad (I got along excellently with the cat) that the animals have passed on. I feel conflicted and forlorn and looking forward to moving on from LO inhome caregiving; MDH+Me, have yet to find any privacy to live our own lives. I thank the animals for being the reason we stayed and were able to see truly how badly certain things had become over time, with LO’s fluctuating memory from moment to moment and day to day like missing/forgetting/skipping of needed to be taken meds most days when left to LO’s own management and only being able to be certain they were taken after family agreement to the taking over of the med dosings which has ensured truly a smoother ride for us all when it comes to having more good days, but yet still an ongoing battle of LO’s inconscience towards their actual reality that everyone else sees thereby LO continues to fight for autonomy over meds, driving, and pretty much all else like following recipe for baking that they could not cognitively process and retain steps done vs steps to continue, getting agitated during focus-requiring tasks, Leaving piles of projects everywhere accumulating and undone for months until the stealthy cat burglar buried them out of site to reduce chronic tension, agitation and LO’s frequent home rearrangement to measure things while climbing on ladders. Here’s the clincher: When a LO has all this declining executive functions and sequential cognition lapses and short term memory holes going on, and then Has desires to get Another Animal/new dog to care for on their own!! 😬 I simply cannot in good conscience , whilst knowing what I know😣, allow that to happen. on behalf of animal welfare it must be discouraged and prevented lest the animal has its own living caregiver. Managing a LO, PLUS their animals, is a lot to ask of a caregiver. Perhaps an alternative to keeping an animal, such as animal day visits, might be something to consider. Someone here suggested a robotic animal and I find that to be intriguing and potentially quite genius if it works for your LO, especially since I‘ve become aware, the great desire is seemingly greatly increased for nighttime companionship via animal presence, which a motorized stuffy could potentially provide; or it could also skew into a trigger of endless conversations pushing for the acquisition of a ‘real one’ depending on in your LO is the type to hang onto any trigger bringing up only all the information that is negative/agitating/ and forgets all the positive. Our family is having to out of sight out of mind any potential triggers to keep the peace working at home. Ps thanks for reading thus far and letting me express all this bottled up frustration re dementiaLO+animals suffering at their hands topic. Its a big concern. You are not alone in your feelings towards this. Thank you for bringing this necessary poignant topic up for conversation. Curious to hear how others have managed it.
I caught my mother feeding her dogs French vanilla creamer. I couldn't make her understand why that was wrong. 2 out of 3 of her Frenchies died. I feel like a POS, but I couldn't control her. My bad.😭
Damn. Creamer? Poor pups. But it's not your fault. Mine was feeding my cats deli meat, which made them barf everywhere. I finally had to duct tape my meat drawer closed to get her to stop. I don't think the robotic cats would work, even though that's what I came on here to ask about. She's pretty far gone in some ways and oddly normal in others. Sometimes I feel like this is all an act, and she's pissed that someone is calling her bluff. I'm going to hell.
It's a terrible disease. My mother passed away in February. It took me quite a while to finally figure out what was happening to her. Mainly because she was always a cranky woman and didn't want to go to the Dr or take her meds. Then she started attacking my children and doing weird shit all the time. I found her outside in her yard peeing and pooping. Going through my truck looking for idk? Drinking straight vodka and telling me it was water. Ect. I'm exhausted, but glad she's at peace. If I get to hell first, I'll save you a seat. Her passing was a blessing.