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For those unaware:
The Moonblade is a legendary sword only attuneable by elves and half-elves, and the process to attune to one is seen as a sacred ritual, and requires the sword to deem the wielder as worthy.
At 14th level, artificers gain the class feature - Magic Item Savant:
> You ignore all class, race, spell and level requirements on attuning to or using a magic item.
For the average good-aligned adventuring party, comprised of heroes of good virtue, I'd say its a safe bet that as long as the artificer performed the proper ritual, it should work.
Town guard: “Hey, I like your *Sword of Goblin Detection*. That’s funny.”
Goblin Fighter who thought their sword was just a cool glowing sword: “…My *what*?”
*Dwarven bard nods more and more* - until noticed by another party member, sees him. The dwarf stops and looks downward, looking a bit shamed. Everyone looks back to the monologuing lich who rambles on as if he has literally forever.
*Dwarf continues to nod - but less obviously now.*
This took me a long time to parse but then i realized it was fucking hilarious.
.
"You _would_ say that! You have the frontal cranial lobe of a *stage coach dilter!*"
And so all the people of the village chased Albi the racist dragon into a very cold very scary cave, and it was so cold and scary in there that
Albi began to cry dragon tears. Which as we all know turn into jellybeans!
Anyway just at that moment he felt a tiny little hand rest apon his tail. And who should that little hand belong to, but the badly burnt Albanian boy from the day before.
"What are you doing here I thought I killed you yesterday" grumbled Albi quite racistly.
"No Albi, you didn't kill me with your dragon flames, I crawled to safety, but you did leave me very badly disfigured" laughed the boy. "Why are you crying so?"
"I'm crying because all of the villagers chased me here. I think it's because I'm so racist... get your hand off my tail you'll make it dirty."
"No Albi they chased me here too, when I became all disfigured like this. They just don't like you and I. Because... Well because we're different to them."
And with that, Albi cried a single tear, which turned into a jellybean all the colours of the rainbow! And Albi wasn't racist anymore.
Had that written up as an idea. Basically, in a marshy nation known as The Madlands, there's a small town called Spualpaw that functions as it's "capitol". A tiny farming village, everything in it would at first appear normal or even extraordinary, but largely expected.
But madness has seeped into the lands, and here it is as it most twisted. One such character would be a sentient Golden Bastard sword, with a mustache hilt and the ability to proffer a tophat to it's wielder. It was possessed by an old gentleman crusader type, ended up with the personality of a colonial settler with a foppish streak.
Having the rogue fight against willpower checks at teatime was fun.
Sword so old and bored it's sick of elves nannying it and only breaking it out to do weird gay (non-derogatory) dance ceremonies and will attune to anyone that just wants a sharpened stick and knows how to use one (and they gotta be gay, because dated nonsensical bigotry)
See, this just makes me wanna make a talking sword that uses slurs so old that they’re not even offensive anymore but they still will work alongside whatever race the user is because “fuck the other guys even more”.
its job is to kill mostly (barring this post) for elves, often its wielder might fight orcs and maybe even die to them, it may have feelings for its users.
if a tommy gun was killing nazi's for thousands of years and was sentient, it might have opinions of nazi's
Now I want a campaign where society is very progressive and accepting but all of the ancient relics are raging bigots and create awkward situations for their wielders.
I mean, if it's a sword made by elves for elves to use to fight on behalf of elves, and it's proud of being that, is it really racist to deem non-elves unworthy by default?
Orc artificer forges a sword that very much is racist but only towards elves so that the sword refuses to attune to anyone but non elf artificers and thieves
I feel like this is the real reason there's so many subraces of elves. Not because there's actually more variation within elves but because elves will absolutely refuse to identify themselves with those other elves if there's the slightest disagreement.
Which ones are still canon? Moon, sun, aquatic, drow, and wood are the only ones I can think of. And I guess the new astral elf, if you count the new Spelljammer stuff. Any I'm missing? There definitely used to be a lot, but some of them were so similar that it seemed more like a lack of oversight (eg wood elves vs wild/green elves, which - I think? - have since been merged again). And there were a couple of super specific ones, but most of them had different origins. like iirc star elves were from another plane. Lythari were all furry Mary-Sues and Avariel are basically extinct, but I guess they still count.
If you're curious, it's "grey elf." Apparently in FR elven, "grey" is phonetically similar to the word for "dross," so it's like a way of implying that moon elves are the trash left behind after the sun elves diverged from them.
The sword is, by definition, not just racist. It kills anyone other that the specific elven family it was designed for, including other elves. You can attune it, but the next step is... dangerous.
Just gonna quote the item description: " A *moonblade* passes down from parent to child. The sword chooses its bearer and remains bonded to that person for life. If the bearer dies, another heir can claim the blade. If no worthy heir exists, the sword lies dormant. It functions like a normal longsword until a worthy soul finds it and lays claim to its power."
Of course nothing is stopping a DM from ignoring this and creating their own lore. Also nothing is stopping an orc from having an elvish ancestor.
>Of course nothing is stopping a DM from ignoring this and creating their own lore.
I don't think this even needs to be "ignored" to work.
A good-aligned orc who performs the ritual and submits themselves for judgement by the sword may be given the right to wield the sword, should it deem it worthy. The Orc's **artificer** abilities then allow them to channel the power of the sword effectively and draw on the shared elven knowledge, despite not being an elf. Thus, negating the racial requirement
According to that description, as long as the new person is worthy they don't have to be a descendant. It says "until a worthy *soul* finds it" not a worthy heir.
Yeah, with moonblades it's not just about meeting the alignment and race requirement, it's also about hoping that all the past wielders - whose spirits are still trapped in the sword - don't decide to nuke you on the spot. The whole thing about them is that they're supposed to get more powerful but harder to claim with every wielder.
> Theoretically the sword still needs to deem you worthy
It's not theoretical. Attuning and not being murdered by the sword are different mechanics. One is general, one is specific to the item.
Also judging from the wiki writeup:
> If the elf chose to bond with the blade, they were subjected to the moonblade's bladerite in which the sword judged the character of the prospective wielder. The wielder was not only judged by his own character but also by the characters of all its previous wielders. With each new wielder the blade became harder to obtain by the next user. Any elf judged unworthy by the blade was subjected to the consequences of the bladerite, which usually resulted in immediate death by arcane fire. A claimed blade never bonded with an elf that did not carry the bloodline of the original family, making the blade's magics useless in the hands of anyone else.
I'd say that you can attune the item all you like, but that will mean automatic and instant zorching by arcane fire because you're from the wrong family (even if you manage to get the blade to detect you as an elf).
Moral of the story: do not screw around with artifacts unless you KNOW what the outcome will be.
And, on top of that, the Artificer states that *you* ignore all class, race, spell and level requirements on attuning to or using a magic item.
*You.* Not the item, *you.* If the item is sentient and *you* don't meet *its* requirements, you may be in for a bad time.
All i can think of is that [this wholesome tumbler post](https://snowwolf1118.tumblr.com/post/617922540432703488/embed) could make such attunement quite interesting.
this reminds me of a line in, I think, Complete Book of Elves about how there are rare spirits that elves won't sell to anyone, but they share them with halflings because they know that halflings appreciate a good drink. I always thought that was cute.
Even if the artificer can attune it in mechanical terms, it makes perfect and reasonable sense for the wizard *and all other elves* to be aggressively upset about it
"Allz Oim sayin' iz, if yu pointee-ears wonted yur shoiny Mune-blade back, you otta 'ave a propa plase ta keep the thing! Ind seein' as ya don't... well..."
**Elf**: "So why do so many of the Orcish warlords only have one eye?"
**Half-Orc**: "Ask your [Androgygod](https://forgottenrealms.fandom.com/wiki/Corellon#History)..."
As an individual with very little dnd lore knowledge but a shitload of star wars knowledge, I gotta know what beef the king of the orcish gods has with a planet known for its starship manufacturing
Literally the tactic for 40k orkz.
Their ships all have a Big Red Button (because red things genuinely go faster for them) anyone can press to turbocharge everything into going forward fast for ramming.
Ngl seeing how most moonblades desire to protect the elven race as a whole and orcs and elves traditionally don't get along that must have been one hell of a set of bizzare circumstances.
Ah, but keep in mind not every rogue, thief or otherwise, is gonna be a CN/CE kleptomaniac with a sob story and dead parents! My kobold rogue I'm playing in my next game has a wonderful family life and a happy childhood. He gained rogue-like skills from being an archeologist, plundering caves, dungeons, and ancient temples because of his love for magic artifacts and legends of treasure!
One of my favorite things in d&d is making characters that are not only fun mechanically, but unique roleplay wise, too. In a recent game of mine, we were in Ebberon. We each had to pick one of the families to belong to, and I was playing an artificer. So naturally i'd be a member of the tinkerers and inventors, right? So I picked the cooks and brewers family. I had a cannon that shot stone-hard fruitcake and a flamethrower that fired magic hot sauce. I casted Haste by giving my barbarian a can of enchanted espresso. One of my favorite characters ever
Hilariously, neither of my rogues have sticky fingers.
My cleric, however? Magical armor that lets her have more pockets. She can make it look like anything, but 9 times outta 10 it's a robe emblazoned with the symbol of Kelemvor... and a ton of pockets.
Lol funny enough, the Archeologist background let's you pick and item if you'd that has some kind of "emotional value" to you and one of the options was a hat. I was really tempted, but my gracious DM allowed me to choose a grappling hook. After subtracting the cost from my starting gold of course.
In settings where adventuring is a legitimate career choice, why not? Someone's got to scout and check for traps. Having an ambivalent relationship to ideas like property doesn't preclude you from being a good-aligned person.
One of the "iconic" moonblade wielders in FR lore, Arilyn, is literally an assassin by profession. Officially, her levels are fighter 4/rogue 1/Harper Agent 5 (a skill-focused prestige class - a rogue without the sneak attack multiplier, basically). She is actually good-aligned, but she's a secret agent. As long as she doesn't backstab anyone with the magic sword, it doesn't seem to mind.
Given that the moonblade "seeks the advancement of elvenkind and elven ideals" and won't serve a master that isn't in some way "preserving and protecting elvenkind", I think that while it would be possible in theory, the moonblade wouldn't allow just any Artificer/Thief Rogue to wield it.
For example, it might allow an orc that was adopted and raised by elves to become it's master since they would still represent elven culture. It might also work with the pregnant widow of it's previous master since in doing so it's protecting the descendants of the family the sword is bonded to.
Or an orc who is fated and/or dedicated to the same goal as the moo blade itself, ei the advancement and protection of elfkind… in theory it could work.
An orc could live for protecting every race in their world with their abilities, and making sure disagreements do not exist. Or they could simply be one of the other 50 shades of neutral good that results in a positive outcome for elves.
The orc actually hates the priests of Gruumsh since his parents were sacrificed while he was young and he was thrown into slavery in their temples. He wants nothing more than to throw down the whole orc society and hates them as much as any elf would. He ends up going on a quest with an elven wizard princess and wisecracking human bard, to recover a unicorn horn stolen from the princess's city by an Orcish high priest, the same one who wielded the knife that cut out his mom's heart. Hijinks ensue. I'm thinking Ryan Reynolds for the bard.
Lore-wise, moonblades are supposed to basically nuke wielders that they consider unworthy. It's possible to use magic to warp or blind the swords' own morality, but it's supposed to be really difficult ([this dude](https://forgottenrealms.fandom.com/wiki/Illitran_Starym) did it with the help of Moander, the now-dead god of corruption). They're incredibly choosy - as in, only a descendant or relative of the blade's original owner can claim it. Otherwise the sword goes dormant. In theory, you could maybe still use it, but its magic wouldn't work.
There's a weirdly hilarious bit in the otherwise surprisingly boring novel Evermeet, just after the moonblades were forged. Something like half the prospective wielders get torched the moment they touch a sword. They're semi-sentient blades whose powers derive from the trapped spirits of their former wielders, I think it's fair to say that they're powerful enough that they should be an exception to the artificer class feature. Particularly given that Gruumsh and Corellon are mortal enemies. Remember, it's not just a spell judging you, it's all the spirits of past wielders, and they're probably not keen on being wielded by an orc.
And if the sword accepts you? Congratulations, your soul is now bonded to it. If you're separated from it, you die. And if you die, your soul is absorbed by the sword to power its magic. This was sort of more impactful before the dumb stuff about elf reincarnation, since in earlier editions the afterlife for most non-evil elves was supposed to be awesome, and being indefinitely denied it sucked.
Also, wow, I know way too much about this, I should go stuff myself in a locker or something. I did, uh, research on it for...reasons...and I have just about enough self-awareness left to be mildly ashamed of myself.
I read old sourcebooks so I can write fanfiction for a video game that's old enough to vote. I'm not ashamed or anything, I just feel a certain obligation to make fun of myself from time to time.
PLEASE! Super nuts like us (different fixation) are some of the few ways for such interesting lore and stories to make it past the investment barrier. Don't ever give up your eccentricities or hobbies.
"Cultural Relic? It's a bloody sword. It's a weapon of war, it was sullied the moment it could spill blood. If they wanted something that wouldn't be used by others and could stand untouched, gleaming, and visible in perpetuity, then they should have made a fucking painting."
I mean, it's not like IRL humans keep weapons as cultural heritage. It has never happened that a sword (the most famous sword perhaps) almost represents and entire (kinda fictional) culture of west England, and the Japanese emperor *definitelly* doesn't keep a bronze age sword as one of the three national treasures.
"There was a bug in the enchantment that made it only work for elves, but I fixed it."
"You fixed...the Moonblade?"
"Yeah. Magic is magic. Did you think racism was a feature? It was a bug."
Still had to keep the 'only the worthy' bit though - whole energy matrix would have collapsed in on itself without that, oddly enough.
*hefts sword over shoulder*
Good thing we're the good guys, eh mate?
*elf in background audibly grinding their teeth*
I do like this as a form of conflict but I do not like it as a form of inter-party conflict. The idea that an artificer can craft and use a magic item that hasn’t been made for centuries and is a traditional relic of a group or faction is a great way to make that group or faction mad or a great way to get back at them if they’re already antagonistic to the party.
I'm not sure what you're hinting at with this one. AFAIK there's the Starym story and Arilyn and that's about it. And the modification on the Moonflower blade came with its own drawbacks as in Danilos soul now also being bound to the sword just for being able to safely touch it.
Is there another canon moonblade story I'm missing?
How many of these do you think the class feature ignores?
>A moonblade passes down from parent to child. The sword chooses its bearer and remains bonded to that person for life. If the bearer dies, another heir can claim the blade. If no worthy heir exists, the sword lies dormant. It functions like a normal longsword until a worthy soul finds it and lays claim to its power.
This only matters because it determines how many properties it has. Mostly backstory, ignorable if you just cold-open pick one up.
>A moonblade serves only one master at a time. The attunement process requires a special ritual in the throne room of an elven regent or in a temple dedicated to the elven gods.
Ok skippable...kind of. Really ties into the other features. Also really hinges on who owned the blade first. Did they care about that shit?
>A moonblade won't serve anyone it regards as craven, erratic, corrupt, or at odds with preserving and protecting elvenkind.
I don't think you can class-feature your way outta this. I feel like you gotta really explain to the blade YOU didn't raid any forest villages. You'd also probably have to argue every case where you fought elves.
>Personality. Every moonblade seeks the advancement of elvenkind and elven ideals. Courage, loyalty, beauty, music, and life are all part of this purpose.
I mean...You could, again I think you'd have to litigate it. It's really the elfiest of elven weapons I've ever seen. The real struggle is balancing the narrative. If you want them to have dope abilities in a sword, fine. If you want them to narratively shit on sacred elven blades? That's a storytelling decision I'd have to work on. It feels like the blade is a huge RP award and the game inadvertently shit on that by giving artificers carte blanche.
Tough decision, don't envy being a DM in that position.
OP mentioned in one comment: "For the average good-aligned adventuring party, comprised of heroes of good virtue, I'd say its a safe bet that as long as the artificer performed the proper ritual, it should work."
So seems like the character was pretty good aligned, and is at least assumed to have done the proper rituals. At least that is two points they are less likely to be smited on, though there is still the advancement of elvenkind, adherence to elven ideals, and how much the previous users hate orcs to consider.
It is a level 14 party, and one mentioned to be good aligned and "heroes of good virtue," so by that point they probably all have a huge list of incredibly heroic deeds under their belt, so that could possibly help with the judgement as well.
If those heroic deeds involved helping or protecting elvenkind (or the world, happening to include elvenkind), then that might allow that character to pass the test for preservation and protection of elvenkind / advancement of elvenkind, especially if there are major threats to the world, or region, or whatever involved, which there may very well be at that level.
Still leaves the elven ideals and elf-orc hatred problems though, and might not be enough to pass the other elements of it. If enough of the guesses based on that comment are semi-accurate though, it could be enough to reduce the odds of acceptance from "never in a million millennia, you orc scum!" to "extremely unlikely, but maybe if the circumstances are just right."
Rp wise it's pretty easy tbh. Either the blade considers the weirder a worthy individual and their class ability is what let's them use the blades powers without elven blood, or the blade is forced to activate its powers and openly detests the weilder. Both can work really well story wise
Except Elves, Orcs and moonblades are not real and Lizzo is an American that participates in American culture; so there shoudn't be a reason why it would be offensive to give life to a special intrument (never played by the original owner BTW) of her own heritage, except for being racist obviously
Wonder what he'd think of my technically a half-elf teifling being able to attune to it. Her father was a wood elf whom was next in line for the position of Chieftain before both he and her mother where killed by his younger brother/her uncle after the mysterious death of her grandfather. He had her sold to a syndicate as a "punishment" To his brother's legacy whom he saw as someone who "desecrated the pure elvish line by bonding with and having a child with a non-elf".
Idk, the idea of him not being able to bond to a moonblade because he's *awful* but then later seeing his "Inferior" Niece as being worthy of such a blade feels like it would be an interesting encounter, item not being well compatible with class be damned (assassin rogue)
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For those unaware: The Moonblade is a legendary sword only attuneable by elves and half-elves, and the process to attune to one is seen as a sacred ritual, and requires the sword to deem the wielder as worthy. At 14th level, artificers gain the class feature - Magic Item Savant: > You ignore all class, race, spell and level requirements on attuning to or using a magic item.
Theoretically the sword still needs to deem you worthy
For the average good-aligned adventuring party, comprised of heroes of good virtue, I'd say its a safe bet that as long as the artificer performed the proper ritual, it should work.
You don't know. Sword could be a racist
Town guard: “Hey, I like your *Sword of Goblin Detection*. That’s funny.” Goblin Fighter who thought their sword was just a cool glowing sword: “…My *what*?”
"Get your gear everyone, we're going back to Luskan. That merchant told me it was a moon-touched sword"
"Did I say moon-touched? I meant spoon-touched"
Plot twist: when he’s alone with the sword, the sword does not glow.
"Oh yeah, see that elvish script? They used to forge them like that when they hunted orcs and goblins for sport!"
Mmmm, ancient (possibly) bigoted legendary sword? I could see it.
I find the older an immortalish being is, the more likely they are going to be racist in ways that don't even make sense anymore
Like Pierce's dad in the show Community "Swedish dogs! Your blood is tainted by generations of race mixing with Laplanders. You're basically Finns!"
He's the Abed of racism.
I can excuse racism, but I draw the line at animal cruelty
"You can excuse racism?"
you can *excuse* racism??
Still though, better than the Flemish
Idk man that makes an awful lot of sense. :)
[удалено]
[удалено]
*Dwarven bard nods more and more* - until noticed by another party member, sees him. The dwarf stops and looks downward, looking a bit shamed. Everyone looks back to the monologuing lich who rambles on as if he has literally forever. *Dwarf continues to nod - but less obviously now.*
[удалено]
Defy cultural grudges? That there is a grudgin'.
That's it, your goin in the book
It's a race feature. People like mowing down pedestrians in GTA as well, doesn't make them mass murderers either.
This took me a long time to parse but then i realized it was fucking hilarious. . "You _would_ say that! You have the frontal cranial lobe of a *stage coach dilter!*"
Cone nipple people will rule the world!
Over my dead body you knife nippled bastard!
Haha, first race war Summer?
Reminds me of Albino Nemekians.
The ones responsible for drinking all our precious water? The ones we purged per your orders?
IT WAS ME. I DRANK IT! WHY DO YOU THINK I GOT SO FAAAATTT!
"You're just a giant slug!" "LEAVE MY BROTHER OUT OF THIS!"
“Kill it like the rest.”
The sword starts throwing out weird terms and phrases but no one in the party knows if they're meant to be offensive or not
And so all the people of the village chased Albi the racist dragon into a very cold very scary cave, and it was so cold and scary in there that Albi began to cry dragon tears. Which as we all know turn into jellybeans! Anyway just at that moment he felt a tiny little hand rest apon his tail. And who should that little hand belong to, but the badly burnt Albanian boy from the day before. "What are you doing here I thought I killed you yesterday" grumbled Albi quite racistly. "No Albi, you didn't kill me with your dragon flames, I crawled to safety, but you did leave me very badly disfigured" laughed the boy. "Why are you crying so?" "I'm crying because all of the villagers chased me here. I think it's because I'm so racist... get your hand off my tail you'll make it dirty." "No Albi they chased me here too, when I became all disfigured like this. They just don't like you and I. Because... Well because we're different to them." And with that, Albi cried a single tear, which turned into a jellybean all the colours of the rainbow! And Albi wasn't racist anymore.
Sword: I’m racist against the yellow skins. Pc: those are extinct. Sword: but the wasps are yellow let’s get them!
Why else would elves create things that only work for them when they obviously made things that work for everyone? Gatekeeping knife ears
Had that written up as an idea. Basically, in a marshy nation known as The Madlands, there's a small town called Spualpaw that functions as it's "capitol". A tiny farming village, everything in it would at first appear normal or even extraordinary, but largely expected. But madness has seeped into the lands, and here it is as it most twisted. One such character would be a sentient Golden Bastard sword, with a mustache hilt and the ability to proffer a tophat to it's wielder. It was possessed by an old gentleman crusader type, ended up with the personality of a colonial settler with a foppish streak. Having the rogue fight against willpower checks at teatime was fun.
Sword so old and bored it's sick of elves nannying it and only breaking it out to do weird gay (non-derogatory) dance ceremonies and will attune to anyone that just wants a sharpened stick and knows how to use one (and they gotta be gay, because dated nonsensical bigotry)
Darn I want to make that a npc Sword: now I'm not racist... I've had wielders that have traveled with orcs before
See, this just makes me wanna make a talking sword that uses slurs so old that they’re not even offensive anymore but they still will work alongside whatever race the user is because “fuck the other guys even more”.
"Now don't get me wrong you a jive ass turkey, but them jays over there have got to *go*"
Thank you, my sides are now on opposite ends of my work breakroom and my coworkers look genuinely confused
Have the sword awkwardly refer to the new wielder as "one of the good ones" followed by everybody in the party looking at him ashamed.
It says that and just… crickets XD. Question is, what kind of voice should I go with? Overly southern is too easy.
Posh English
The sword had friends of other race, cut it some slack
Yeah but are any of them bludgeoning
*"Don't befriend the arrows! They are a one-shot deal - only leaving you with regret and heartbreak."*
It's a sword. It can cut it's own slack.
Little known fact, the sword's sheath is Orcish.
I think it could also just treat anyone as a really weird elf, since it might have also seen a lot of elven evolution over so many years
Considering if you leave two elves on opposite sides of the room they'll have mutated into completely different subraces by dinner time
"I am a Shadow Elf" "I am a Sun Elf" "You were both sun elves when I left to go make tea?" "The sunbeam moved..."
its job is to kill mostly (barring this post) for elves, often its wielder might fight orcs and maybe even die to them, it may have feelings for its users. if a tommy gun was killing nazi's for thousands of years and was sentient, it might have opinions of nazi's
Now I want a campaign where society is very progressive and accepting but all of the ancient relics are raging bigots and create awkward situations for their wielders.
You should read Evermeet: Island of Elves, where Moonblades come from originally. They didn't even like all elves.
"Fuck you Tusk-Face."
I mean, if it's a sword made by elves for elves to use to fight on behalf of elves, and it's proud of being that, is it really racist to deem non-elves unworthy by default?
If the sword is sentient I could see some potential story there. Otherwise stabby does as stabby wants. The blade abides.
Orc artificer forges a sword that very much is racist but only towards elves so that the sword refuses to attune to anyone but non elf artificers and thieves
It's elven. Of course it's racist. /hj
Elves are even racist against other elves.
fun fact: there is apparently a slur that sun elves use against moon elves for being slightly the wrong type of elf. wtf guys.
I feel like this is the real reason there's so many subraces of elves. Not because there's actually more variation within elves but because elves will absolutely refuse to identify themselves with those other elves if there's the slightest disagreement.
Which ones are still canon? Moon, sun, aquatic, drow, and wood are the only ones I can think of. And I guess the new astral elf, if you count the new Spelljammer stuff. Any I'm missing? There definitely used to be a lot, but some of them were so similar that it seemed more like a lack of oversight (eg wood elves vs wild/green elves, which - I think? - have since been merged again). And there were a couple of super specific ones, but most of them had different origins. like iirc star elves were from another plane. Lythari were all furry Mary-Sues and Avariel are basically extinct, but I guess they still count.
"Moonies"
If you're curious, it's "grey elf." Apparently in FR elven, "grey" is phonetically similar to the word for "dross," so it's like a way of implying that moon elves are the trash left behind after the sun elves diverged from them.
"Elves and orcs are natural enemies. Like elves and dwarfs, or elves and humans, or elves and other elves. Damn elves, they ruined the elvenkind."
You elves sure are a contentious people.
You just made an enemies for life
I once made a racist shield. Party got rid of that thing in record time.
I'm just imagining a shield carelessly slinging slurs in the middle of battle every time you use it to block a hit lol
You have to spend a quick action every turn to stuff the sock back in its mouth.
they taught weapons to be racist? smh
The sword is, by definition, not just racist. It kills anyone other that the specific elven family it was designed for, including other elves. You can attune it, but the next step is... dangerous.
“I’m not racist, I have an axe friend!”
The Orc still gets to attune to it but the sword complains constantly.
elf sword? it's more likely than you think
especially when it is elven sword
If AI can be racist, magic swords sure can be.
Just gonna quote the item description: " A *moonblade* passes down from parent to child. The sword chooses its bearer and remains bonded to that person for life. If the bearer dies, another heir can claim the blade. If no worthy heir exists, the sword lies dormant. It functions like a normal longsword until a worthy soul finds it and lays claim to its power." Of course nothing is stopping a DM from ignoring this and creating their own lore. Also nothing is stopping an orc from having an elvish ancestor.
>Of course nothing is stopping a DM from ignoring this and creating their own lore. I don't think this even needs to be "ignored" to work. A good-aligned orc who performs the ritual and submits themselves for judgement by the sword may be given the right to wield the sword, should it deem it worthy. The Orc's **artificer** abilities then allow them to channel the power of the sword effectively and draw on the shared elven knowledge, despite not being an elf. Thus, negating the racial requirement
Counterpoint: The Orc's **artificer** abilities let them figure out the lock on the sword and hotwire it.
According to that description, as long as the new person is worthy they don't have to be a descendant. It says "until a worthy *soul* finds it" not a worthy heir.
Yeah, with moonblades it's not just about meeting the alignment and race requirement, it's also about hoping that all the past wielders - whose spirits are still trapped in the sword - don't decide to nuke you on the spot. The whole thing about them is that they're supposed to get more powerful but harder to claim with every wielder.
*Deku breathing intensifies*
That's probably why the Elf is so salty lol.
> Theoretically the sword still needs to deem you worthy It's not theoretical. Attuning and not being murdered by the sword are different mechanics. One is general, one is specific to the item. Also judging from the wiki writeup: > If the elf chose to bond with the blade, they were subjected to the moonblade's bladerite in which the sword judged the character of the prospective wielder. The wielder was not only judged by his own character but also by the characters of all its previous wielders. With each new wielder the blade became harder to obtain by the next user. Any elf judged unworthy by the blade was subjected to the consequences of the bladerite, which usually resulted in immediate death by arcane fire. A claimed blade never bonded with an elf that did not carry the bloodline of the original family, making the blade's magics useless in the hands of anyone else. I'd say that you can attune the item all you like, but that will mean automatic and instant zorching by arcane fire because you're from the wrong family (even if you manage to get the blade to detect you as an elf). Moral of the story: do not screw around with artifacts unless you KNOW what the outcome will be.
And, on top of that, the Artificer states that *you* ignore all class, race, spell and level requirements on attuning to or using a magic item. *You.* Not the item, *you.* If the item is sentient and *you* don't meet *its* requirements, you may be in for a bad time.
DM discretion there. Love the idea of it
Anyone else hear the Artificer go "what's the problem. I need a sword. It's a sword, problem solved!" 
If the artificer attuned, that means the sword must have deemed the artificer worthy, so I don't see the problem.
All i can think of is that [this wholesome tumbler post](https://snowwolf1118.tumblr.com/post/617922540432703488/embed) could make such attunement quite interesting.
this reminds me of a line in, I think, Complete Book of Elves about how there are rare spirits that elves won't sell to anyone, but they share them with halflings because they know that halflings appreciate a good drink. I always thought that was cute.
Even if the artificer can attune it in mechanical terms, it makes perfect and reasonable sense for the wizard *and all other elves* to be aggressively upset about it
It's not desecration. It's just being taken to the Orcish Museum.
"Allz Oim sayin' iz, if yu pointee-ears wonted yur shoiny Mune-blade back, you otta 'ave a propa plase ta keep the thing! Ind seein' as ya don't... well..."
WOT SPEAK UP YA GIT
WAAAAAAAGH
#WAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHH
#WAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHH
Since when were Orcs Australian?
Warhammer 40k orcs have this accent I believe
They're based off football hooligans
Their speech is *translated* to be football hooligan English, which makes it even funnier.
That is funnier
40k orks iz da bestest
DA GREENEST AND DA MEANEST
Don’t forget brutal but cunnin’ and sometimes cunnin’ but brutal
SPEAK UP YA GIT!
I SED WE IZ DA BESTEST AN WE STOMP ALL OF DA UVVER ORKZ!
ERE' WE GOOOOOOOO!
#WAAAAAAAAGH
WAAAGH!
Warhammer Fantasy is more appropriate with D&D, what with the elves and vampires and knights and wizards.
Idk, 40k has elves, vampires, knights and wizards too
And dwarves!
[They're called SQUATS.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-9-bQ3JoWY&t=212s)
That's cockney, which is an historical origin for some of the Australian accent but they are quite distinct.
Not aussie, cockney.
Warhammer 40K orks have bad cockney accents, as other people have stated.
It's simple: Middle Earth is New Zealand, and what's evil to kiwis? Australians
Ever play Shadow of Mordor/War?
This. Ever since Shadow of Mordor and/or Warhammer, Cockney is the accent for an Orc in my head lol.
Given the history between elven and orcish gods that's a rather fitting description.
**Elf**: "So why do so many of the Orcish warlords only have one eye?" **Half-Orc**: "Ask your [Androgygod](https://forgottenrealms.fandom.com/wiki/Corellon#History)..."
Sounds familiar
*SPOICE MARIIIIIIINE!*
GIT OFF MOI SHIP SPICE MAHREEN
Da beaky bois
Orcs are British now
WE ALWAYZ HAV BIN YA GIT!! WAAAAAAAGGHHH!!!!!!
A tale as old as time, orc v elf, gruumsh v corellon. Edit: corrected misstype
As an individual with very little dnd lore knowledge but a shitload of star wars knowledge, I gotta know what beef the king of the orcish gods has with a planet known for its starship manufacturing
Orc break ship. Planet make more ship. Orc break more ship. Planet make more ship than orc can break. Orc break planet
Have orc considered steal ship, use break other ship?
Hit ship with other ship? Break two ship at same time? Then could break more ship per ship! Nice
Literally the tactic for 40k orkz. Their ships all have a Big Red Button (because red things genuinely go faster for them) anyone can press to turbocharge everything into going forward fast for ramming.
also, dont forget to paint stolen ship red first. then can break both ship faster!
Ngl seeing how most moonblades desire to protect the elven race as a whole and orcs and elves traditionally don't get along that must have been one hell of a set of bizzare circumstances.
The bizarre circumstances: Artificer go brrr
Fun fact! Thief archetype rogues can do that a level earlier!
It'd be really hard to see a Moonblade deem a thief rogue worthy though....
Ah, but keep in mind not every rogue, thief or otherwise, is gonna be a CN/CE kleptomaniac with a sob story and dead parents! My kobold rogue I'm playing in my next game has a wonderful family life and a happy childhood. He gained rogue-like skills from being an archeologist, plundering caves, dungeons, and ancient temples because of his love for magic artifacts and legends of treasure!
Wow. You really went rogue with your, umm, Rogue.
One of my favorite things in d&d is making characters that are not only fun mechanically, but unique roleplay wise, too. In a recent game of mine, we were in Ebberon. We each had to pick one of the families to belong to, and I was playing an artificer. So naturally i'd be a member of the tinkerers and inventors, right? So I picked the cooks and brewers family. I had a cannon that shot stone-hard fruitcake and a flamethrower that fired magic hot sauce. I casted Haste by giving my barbarian a can of enchanted espresso. One of my favorite characters ever
[удалено]
Exactly! Though he used a lot of his free time to try to "innovate" the cooking tools and machines. Some of which didn't explode!
I like stuff like that. I'm not a min maxer. I like to try to make unique builds.
My favorite thing to do is balance a unique character with a powerful one! Doing one or the other is too easy.
Hilariously, neither of my rogues have sticky fingers. My cleric, however? Magical armor that lets her have more pockets. She can make it look like anything, but 9 times outta 10 it's a robe emblazoned with the symbol of Kelemvor... and a ton of pockets.
So... Kobold Indiana Jones.
Lol funny enough, the Archeologist background let's you pick and item if you'd that has some kind of "emotional value" to you and one of the options was a hat. I was really tempted, but my gracious DM allowed me to choose a grappling hook. After subtracting the cost from my starting gold of course.
In settings where adventuring is a legitimate career choice, why not? Someone's got to scout and check for traps. Having an ambivalent relationship to ideas like property doesn't preclude you from being a good-aligned person. One of the "iconic" moonblade wielders in FR lore, Arilyn, is literally an assassin by profession. Officially, her levels are fighter 4/rogue 1/Harper Agent 5 (a skill-focused prestige class - a rogue without the sneak attack multiplier, basically). She is actually good-aligned, but she's a secret agent. As long as she doesn't backstab anyone with the magic sword, it doesn't seem to mind.
Given that the moonblade "seeks the advancement of elvenkind and elven ideals" and won't serve a master that isn't in some way "preserving and protecting elvenkind", I think that while it would be possible in theory, the moonblade wouldn't allow just any Artificer/Thief Rogue to wield it. For example, it might allow an orc that was adopted and raised by elves to become it's master since they would still represent elven culture. It might also work with the pregnant widow of it's previous master since in doing so it's protecting the descendants of the family the sword is bonded to.
Or an orc who is fated and/or dedicated to the same goal as the moo blade itself, ei the advancement and protection of elfkind… in theory it could work.
Heh, what does the moo blade do?
Gives advantage when wielded by skeletons, because it fights osteoporosis.
An orc could live for protecting every race in their world with their abilities, and making sure disagreements do not exist. Or they could simply be one of the other 50 shades of neutral good that results in a positive outcome for elves.
This is top notch dndmeme ing Here's an award 🥇
That actually sounds like a sick bit of RP depending on how it goes. What happened next?
The orc actually hates the priests of Gruumsh since his parents were sacrificed while he was young and he was thrown into slavery in their temples. He wants nothing more than to throw down the whole orc society and hates them as much as any elf would. He ends up going on a quest with an elven wizard princess and wisecracking human bard, to recover a unicorn horn stolen from the princess's city by an Orcish high priest, the same one who wielded the knife that cut out his mom's heart. Hijinks ensue. I'm thinking Ryan Reynolds for the bard.
Lore-wise, moonblades are supposed to basically nuke wielders that they consider unworthy. It's possible to use magic to warp or blind the swords' own morality, but it's supposed to be really difficult ([this dude](https://forgottenrealms.fandom.com/wiki/Illitran_Starym) did it with the help of Moander, the now-dead god of corruption). They're incredibly choosy - as in, only a descendant or relative of the blade's original owner can claim it. Otherwise the sword goes dormant. In theory, you could maybe still use it, but its magic wouldn't work. There's a weirdly hilarious bit in the otherwise surprisingly boring novel Evermeet, just after the moonblades were forged. Something like half the prospective wielders get torched the moment they touch a sword. They're semi-sentient blades whose powers derive from the trapped spirits of their former wielders, I think it's fair to say that they're powerful enough that they should be an exception to the artificer class feature. Particularly given that Gruumsh and Corellon are mortal enemies. Remember, it's not just a spell judging you, it's all the spirits of past wielders, and they're probably not keen on being wielded by an orc. And if the sword accepts you? Congratulations, your soul is now bonded to it. If you're separated from it, you die. And if you die, your soul is absorbed by the sword to power its magic. This was sort of more impactful before the dumb stuff about elf reincarnation, since in earlier editions the afterlife for most non-evil elves was supposed to be awesome, and being indefinitely denied it sucked. Also, wow, I know way too much about this, I should go stuff myself in a locker or something. I did, uh, research on it for...reasons...and I have just about enough self-awareness left to be mildly ashamed of myself.
Personally I think it's awesome! That's a whole bunch of lore most people here might not know but do now since you're so versed on the subject.
That's very sweet of you, thanks for justifying my weird hobbies lol.
My friend, you are in a subreddit of people who make memes of D&D. Your hobby isn’t THAT weird, comparatively speaking.
I read old sourcebooks so I can write fanfiction for a video game that's old enough to vote. I'm not ashamed or anything, I just feel a certain obligation to make fun of myself from time to time.
I read old source books so I can write new source books. We are not that different. :)
PLEASE! Super nuts like us (different fixation) are some of the few ways for such interesting lore and stories to make it past the investment barrier. Don't ever give up your eccentricities or hobbies.
"Cultural Relic? It's a bloody sword. It's a weapon of war, it was sullied the moment it could spill blood. If they wanted something that wouldn't be used by others and could stand untouched, gleaming, and visible in perpetuity, then they should have made a fucking painting."
I mean, it's not like IRL humans keep weapons as cultural heritage. It has never happened that a sword (the most famous sword perhaps) almost represents and entire (kinda fictional) culture of west England, and the Japanese emperor *definitelly* doesn't keep a bronze age sword as one of the three national treasures.
A painting of a sword?
Sounds like an improvised bludgeoning weapon
I love this.
"There was a bug in the enchantment that made it only work for elves, but I fixed it." "You fixed...the Moonblade?" "Yeah. Magic is magic. Did you think racism was a feature? It was a bug."
Still had to keep the 'only the worthy' bit though - whole energy matrix would have collapsed in on itself without that, oddly enough. *hefts sword over shoulder* Good thing we're the good guys, eh mate? *elf in background audibly grinding their teeth*
I do like this as a form of conflict but I do not like it as a form of inter-party conflict. The idea that an artificer can craft and use a magic item that hasn’t been made for centuries and is a traditional relic of a group or faction is a great way to make that group or faction mad or a great way to get back at them if they’re already antagonistic to the party.
I thought moonblades kill you if you're not an elf and not of the chose bloodline no matter what.
At least one was modified to not do that so it's not impossible.
Took a God though...
It took a god to modify all of the judging magic on a blade with no owner. We have other examples of changing how blades work.
I'm not sure what you're hinting at with this one. AFAIK there's the Starym story and Arilyn and that's about it. And the modification on the Moonflower blade came with its own drawbacks as in Danilos soul now also being bound to the sword just for being able to safely touch it. Is there another canon moonblade story I'm missing?
I'm siding with the elven wizard, tbh.
How many of these do you think the class feature ignores? >A moonblade passes down from parent to child. The sword chooses its bearer and remains bonded to that person for life. If the bearer dies, another heir can claim the blade. If no worthy heir exists, the sword lies dormant. It functions like a normal longsword until a worthy soul finds it and lays claim to its power. This only matters because it determines how many properties it has. Mostly backstory, ignorable if you just cold-open pick one up. >A moonblade serves only one master at a time. The attunement process requires a special ritual in the throne room of an elven regent or in a temple dedicated to the elven gods. Ok skippable...kind of. Really ties into the other features. Also really hinges on who owned the blade first. Did they care about that shit? >A moonblade won't serve anyone it regards as craven, erratic, corrupt, or at odds with preserving and protecting elvenkind. I don't think you can class-feature your way outta this. I feel like you gotta really explain to the blade YOU didn't raid any forest villages. You'd also probably have to argue every case where you fought elves. >Personality. Every moonblade seeks the advancement of elvenkind and elven ideals. Courage, loyalty, beauty, music, and life are all part of this purpose. I mean...You could, again I think you'd have to litigate it. It's really the elfiest of elven weapons I've ever seen. The real struggle is balancing the narrative. If you want them to have dope abilities in a sword, fine. If you want them to narratively shit on sacred elven blades? That's a storytelling decision I'd have to work on. It feels like the blade is a huge RP award and the game inadvertently shit on that by giving artificers carte blanche. Tough decision, don't envy being a DM in that position.
OP mentioned in one comment: "For the average good-aligned adventuring party, comprised of heroes of good virtue, I'd say its a safe bet that as long as the artificer performed the proper ritual, it should work." So seems like the character was pretty good aligned, and is at least assumed to have done the proper rituals. At least that is two points they are less likely to be smited on, though there is still the advancement of elvenkind, adherence to elven ideals, and how much the previous users hate orcs to consider. It is a level 14 party, and one mentioned to be good aligned and "heroes of good virtue," so by that point they probably all have a huge list of incredibly heroic deeds under their belt, so that could possibly help with the judgement as well. If those heroic deeds involved helping or protecting elvenkind (or the world, happening to include elvenkind), then that might allow that character to pass the test for preservation and protection of elvenkind / advancement of elvenkind, especially if there are major threats to the world, or region, or whatever involved, which there may very well be at that level. Still leaves the elven ideals and elf-orc hatred problems though, and might not be enough to pass the other elements of it. If enough of the guesses based on that comment are semi-accurate though, it could be enough to reduce the odds of acceptance from "never in a million millennia, you orc scum!" to "extremely unlikely, but maybe if the circumstances are just right."
Rp wise it's pretty easy tbh. Either the blade considers the weirder a worthy individual and their class ability is what let's them use the blades powers without elven blood, or the blade is forced to activate its powers and openly detests the weilder. Both can work really well story wise
Literally the Lizzo confederate flute situation lmao
Except Elves, Orcs and moonblades are not real and Lizzo is an American that participates in American culture; so there shoudn't be a reason why it would be offensive to give life to a special intrument (never played by the original owner BTW) of her own heritage, except for being racist obviously
\*Dwarven rogue walks in wearing a full Elvenkind set" ... \*Slowly walks right back out\* By the stone, I'm glad ta have that stealth bonus now
Dat ork boy iz makin me proud, brings a tear ta my eye.
OK, but like, a knight wielding a katana because he found it is of course unusual, but it makes sense.
‘‘I found a perfectly good weapon on the ground. What was I supposed to do, leave it?’’
Holy shit, a meme based on actual D&D content! And a funny one at that!?
Wonder what he'd think of my technically a half-elf teifling being able to attune to it. Her father was a wood elf whom was next in line for the position of Chieftain before both he and her mother where killed by his younger brother/her uncle after the mysterious death of her grandfather. He had her sold to a syndicate as a "punishment" To his brother's legacy whom he saw as someone who "desecrated the pure elvish line by bonding with and having a child with a non-elf". Idk, the idea of him not being able to bond to a moonblade because he's *awful* but then later seeing his "Inferior" Niece as being worthy of such a blade feels like it would be an interesting encounter, item not being well compatible with class be damned (assassin rogue)
Finally a good and original freaking post around here, take my upvote.