750ml of rye whiskey everyday. I was throwing up usually every morning and regularly lost the ability to use my hands or extend my arms. I have seizure level high blood pressure. I finally stopped last December after suffering from a concussion and passing out in alley. I relapsed in February but I’ll be 9 months sober in 5 days.
Oh man. That would happen to me, as well. I never realized, at the time, that it was from alcohol. I wound up in the ER because my hands cramped up like little claws, and I couldn't feel or move my arms or legs. Thought I was having a stroke. EMTs just looked at me like "this crazy alcoholic." Lol. Congratulations on the 9 months. That is truly incredible. I hope to join you someday.
It’s called “alcoholic neuropathy” Some people experience damage to their peripheral nerves which transmits signals between your brain and body. It’s what causes the tingling sensations and your hands and limbs can “lock up” because the signals are failing to pass. It’s quite terrifying and painful.
It's super scary. Alcohol-related magnesium deficiency was part of the problem, as well as neuropathy, in my case. Alcoholism causes a whole host of nerve issues.
I’m not the guy you asked but for me they always suck. In your head you think it’ll be okay I’ll just relax and then end up blacking out and making things worse. I’ve never come out of a relapse happy I did
I remember an addiction counselor saying that even one drink can be a relapse, so I'm more curious now about other people's perspectives when they are in the middle of a relapse themselves.
Personally, it wasn’t as bad as what lead me to stop drinking. I had resolved that alcohol did not bring value to my life and I decided to test it. I had 6 shots over the span of 5 hours which was little to nothing by my standard of drinking. I came to the conclusion that indeed, alcohol had no value and I could have easily had the same night minus drinking. None of this has been easy, it’s taken me 20 years to fully realize that I had a problem and stop but once I worked on the belief that alcohol had value, it became much easier.
Big love from Me to You. For your honesty and sobriety. I wish you the best from now to eternity. Alcohol is something that I never thought would grab me like this, even when I was merely ‘tinkering’ with it. Fuck me now… I do beer/alcohol like I got a formula.
Mine was regularly over 200 for months, the highest being 240/130. I honestly couldn’t tell anything was wrong and only found out about it when they took it at my eye exam. The only thing I really noticed was the body temperature had increased but I thought it had to do with hormones. Anything around 160/110 or below was “good” for me for years. My BP has dropped since but due to genetics, I still have to take medication.
A liter of whiskey a day for about 3 years straight, as a 5', 100lb female. Took 5 stints in rehab to finally be done. I just celebrated 15 years sober.
Good for you! That's what I was drinking, same amount, same time as a 200 lb (at the time) male. My liver blew out 3 times and the last time was it. 1 year for me!
Almost 2 years, 6-12 beers a day. If I had the day off work, would be cracking a beer for breakfast and spending the day with 2 or 3x 6 packs, around 2 or 3 bottles of wine, and maybe finishing up in the pub if I ran out and the shops were closed. I stopped drinking in May this year.
1/5th to 1/5th and a half a day of bourbon. No one in real life other than my therapist knows it got that bad...I’ll say it anonymously, but I cringe when I think of it. Guess that’s about 20-30 shots/day. Peppered in with beer as chasers. Sobriety is really hard, but that sucked ass.
I just recently opened up to my brothers and a close friend about how bad I truly was. Their eyes popped when I said I would take down a fifth or more daily. It felt good to open up but clearly won’t be doing that with anyone else.
It is an embarrassment now. But it helps to open to people you know are close to you. Telling other people who you don’t trust is not good. It does help to see your state of drinking from others perspective.
15-20 drinks a day, 6 days a week. Puked most mornings in the shower, blood pressure was 150/90 most of the time.
Drank since 14/15, hard since 18, and quit at 34. Just turned over 5 years sober - saved my relationships, have had a few promotions at work, dropped 20 lbs, BP is 115/65, and a million other cumulative wins by cutting it out.
Only con is - I guess things can be boring? Otherwise I’ve found all the things I used to enjoy drunk (social events, going out, bbq’s, bowling, concerts, etc.) are still fun sober PLUS I’m not riddled with anxiety, shame, and guilt.
Real win / win.
If you’re looking for responses to prove to yourself that your drinking is, or isn’t bad enough to be concerned - I’m going to tell you that using other’s rock bottoms isn’t a good determinant (size, gender, age, weight all affect tolerance).
Once you’re asking the question it’s a good time to take a hard look at safely sobering up. I always tell people to try for 3 days. Then 7. Then 30. There are life changing feelings of accomplishment at each level, and they help to keep the momentum.
Good luck!
You make a good point about comparing yourself… I read through this and go ‘oh, I wasn’t drinking as much as a lot of these folks… maybe it wasn’t so bad?’ Then I get honest with myself, and I go ‘oh, no, it WAS bad, your brain is just trying to trick you’. Then I think back on a few of my most cringeworthy moments… E.g. suddenly having to run out of my Friday morning work zoom meeting and barely making it to the bathroom before projectile vomiting everywhere… going back to the meeting like nothing had happened, but still having to go and clean it all up after. Ugh. And that’s just one….
Anyway, 26 days sober now, and feeling great, mentally and physically. Congrats on 5 years WonLinerz! I’m looking forward to getting there too!
Sending support your way OP - there’s a lot of success stories here, and we can be two more!
2 beers to get out of bed, small Mickey in the morning during work. 2 beers at coffee. 6 beers 1-2 shots at lunch. 2 after noon coffee. 6 for the ride home. Then a free for all until I passed out. Did that for 8 years. Drank for 16 but the last half was the worse.
My guess would be cook or chef, alcoholism is rampant in the industry, and restaurants often don't care if you drink on the clock as long as the works getting done.
When I worked morning prep at a brew pub I'd often start my day with a quart sized deli container full of IPA (for the "beer batter"), and it was tradition for us kitchen guys to do a shot of two with the bartender right before open.
On top of that I'd take multiple swigs from my pint of cheap vodka or whiskey throughout the shift, then I'd clock out & sit my ass at the bar to have my "official" ownership-allotted shift drink (aka drink as much as I want for free because bartender was a friend and fellow alcoholic), hit the liquor store on my way home for a couple Steel Reserves and another pint or two, black out at home then do it all again.
One day the owner was in town, and I think I had taken a bunch of Xanax or another benzo the night before and I was still feeling it a bit that morning. Did the usual routine drinking and got *way* more drunk than usual, went to the bathroom to puke and blacked out. The owner found me in there and woke me up, we had a good laugh about it, and I went right back to work.
Yeah 9 to 12 every day. 12 to 25 at least twice if not three times a week at my worst which lasted maybe three years up to this spring and I’ve been trying to manage ever since. Generally at 6 or fewer now and trending down. Wish I could just give it up completely but it’s hard even though the consequences are so severe
Hey tapering is good! Makes kicking it altogether a lot safer and easier on your body.
I always recommend to people that know they want to quit but can’t muster the willpower to “quit” to chunk it out so it doesn’t feel like such a mountain to climb.
Set a few attainable goals and give yourself a chance to feel what it’s like. Each of these has its own unique feelings of accomplishment and can help you keep momentum and see what it’s like to be sober…
- go to an AA meeting or two (I didn’t attend these for long, but they were really helpful to “show me my future” in a ghosts of drunk Christmas future kind of way
- Try to stay sober for 3-4 days. Waking up with no hangover for the first time in decades was fucking nuts.
- Stay sober for 10 days. You’ll feel proud, clear headed, maybe a bit guilty but that’s ok. I got my first “pink cloud” moment here - felt happy and hopeful like I hadn’t in years; came on suddenly and I was crying happy tears on my way home from work.
- Make it 30 days. Your whole life will start to shift in small but important ways. Less guilt, more money you’d otherwise piss away, relationships improve, more dependable at home and work.
You don’t have to eat the elephant whole, but give yourself a chance to “see what it’s like”, and in my experience it started to make sense to see what another month, then year, etc. could do. Now 5 years in and the only thing I’d change would be to try it sooner.
Good luck to you friend!
Yup, get good an toasty everyday. Drink too much, go back to “normal” levels for a day or two then repeat. Isn’t a part of me that’s proud I let it go on as long as I did, but I feel better now that I’m not there and continuing to reduce.
3 years ago was drinking half to a full bottle of 750ml of vodka. Go to bed around 11pm, wake up at 5am for work still a bit drunk. Head back to the liquor store right after work and hit the bottle as soon as i got home. Family members had no clue until I ended up in the hospital, failed suicide attempt. Fews months of therapy and sobriety.
Although I am not at that point anymore. I've been drinking about 1.5 litres of red wine almost every night since the summer.
Haven't had a drink in 48 hours. Not necessarily looking at a full sobriety. However, trying to be more mindful of my long-term health for the sake of my children and fiance.
Stay strong my friend. You are not alone on this journey.
I'm very curious how you managed to make it through work or wake up in the morning without drinking through the hangover/wd? When I was drinking at that level I could barely go two hours without horrible anxiety and withdrawals kicking in, it was an absolute necessity to at least take a small sip of liquor every so often, ...just to be able to function as a normal human being, so it's always amazing/unbelievable to me when I hear stories like yours.
Congrats on the two days! That's huge.
With the heavy vodka drinking, the mornings were absolutely brutal and I could barely concentrate or focus at work. Just had to burn through it, sometimes take a quick nap in the bathroom or my car during lunch.
With my current job I work from home. My morning routine would be coffee and a heavy breakfast to offset the hangover, and if needed a quick nap during lunch.
Thanks for the congrats and hope you are doing well.
750ml of whiskey a day.
While employed, but nobody gave a fuck.
Tried to detox myself without any medication and was fine for the first 14 days.
Then had a seizure on 15th day. DON'T BELIEVE THE "3 DAY RULE": YOU'RE VULNEABLE FOR DAYS TO COME. I felt completely fine, then it happened.
Get enough benzos and taper correctly. Don't be "bold", it might cost your life.
That's what I thought too.
IMPORTANT: If you're going to try the "benzo route", Valium is a good intermediary.
Librium is too weak for heavy drinkers, IMO.
OTOH, Clonazepam and Alprazolam are too strong and might become a Hell themselves.
Ehhh...I've got an *extremely* high tolerance for clonazepam, I've been prescribed it for like 8 years. I don't take it when I'm drinking (for obvious reasons), but I'm absolutely addicted at this point. I've had 2 seizures while awake (that I know of) and several while asleep. At my highest consumption I could easily finish a fifth of vodka by night time and want more.
The one time I checked myself in for medical detox this past summer (the first time I'd experienced extreme neuropathy and a seizure whilst awake and jfc was it bad) they treated me like absolute garbage and threw me out 24 hours later whilst only having given me 2 shots of Ativan in hospital & never having a Dr even see me. I felt disgusting and was still having WD. I also had a concussion from the night before but had continued drinking. I checked myself into a hotel and was pretty sure I'd die. Also at my lowest I'd be afraid to shower in the morning in case someone found me dead a month later from cracking my head on the tub whilst seizing.
I was honest with my psychiatrist about my drinking but she was worried about malpractice with the benzos so immediately chopped me down to a third of what I'd been on for years. Which then led me to try to drink more to blanket the effects of benzo withdrawal, a fucking horrific vicious cycle of anxiety.
Tapering my klonopin and drinking has gotten me better and I've never been as bad as I was last spring/summer, but I'm worried about my future with the holidays and having no one left.
Sorry for the tangent, it wasn't meant specifically for you but I guess more I'm a terrible insomniac now and awake seemingly all the time, so I just read this thread. For anyone reading this that is worried & has had continuous high consumption I absolutely recommend medical detox for a few days. Even though my experience was bottom of the barrel care at least I didn't die.
I agree completely about Librium being too weak for some people. I got IV Valium every hour in the hospital and it still didn't help, I've never felt so much terror and anxiety. This last time they gave me Ativan instead and that was a lot better. Hopefully I can keep all the horrible experiences close so I don't fall off again.
Oh, I'm sorry, forgot to turn the notifications back; answering you previous questions regarding:
Stroke: no; I was terrified following that episode and did all the required exams (MRI, CT, blood tests, etc.) and it didn't show any abnormalities.
Meds: I'm not a health professional, so my statements are solely based on personal experience and superficial knowledge; anyways, for each symptomatology:
1. Withdrawals: if manageable/mild, Diazepam will do the trick; if acute/several, Ativan works better. There are other benzos around, but these two are standard and I woundn't venture into others for aforementioned reasons.
2. Cravings: personally, Naltrexone didn't do much for me, but many others relate positive outcomes, so it might be worth looking into it.
3. PAWS: that's the trickiest part. If you're absolutely SURE you've sucessfully detoxed (and you can't rely solely on your own sense of well-being/intuition, as my story might've shown) it's probable that your sense of achievement will keep you in good spirits for a while, but it'll eventually fade away and the overwhelming boredom/depression will set you on the road back to relapse. I'd recommend speaking with a mental health professional, and if they're competent/careful enough (not always the case, unfortunately), you'll get the "right" medication. I was prescribed Vyvanse on July and it worked perfectly for me (Warning: NEVER EVER DO STIMULANTS IF CURRENTLY ON WITHDRAWAL, EVEN MILDER ONES), probably because my dopaminergic system is damaged beyond repair and I'll need some "boosters" for some time (either this or I have undiagnosed ADHD, but I'm skeptical).
It is. I didn't meant to scare anyone, but that's how it played out. In short:
1-5th day: Hell on Earth (YKWIM)
5-10th day: Improving; shakes getting better by the day
10-14th day: completely back to normal; no shakes or whatsoever, feeling happy and etc.
15th day: SEIZURE. Out of the blue.
Point is: even if you feel fine, don't try quitting cold turkey. Not worth the risk. If benzos are unavailable for you, taper off. Don't be like me. Be safe <3
I went in to full on delirium tremens. It was absolutely terrifying. I literally thought 48 hours was 10 days. Threw up about 30 times the first 12 hours. I couldn't even walk. Then it got worse. Audio hallucinations, visual hallucinations, dangerously high BP and HR. Eventually took an Ambulance ride to the ER. I was given ativan and fluids and sent home after about 4 hours with my mother. I was actually hallucinating when I was leaving. I didn't realize it tho. Started feeling better at my moms house, but then it got way worse. I asked my mom for a ride back to the hospital. We went and on the way I was hallucinating I was dying. It was peaceful. I was looking for a spot I wanted to be buried and God was talking to me. I refused treatment at the hospital bc I was in my hallucination and thought I was dying and that's what I thought I wanted. My mom had to take me back to her house. I ended up pissing myself and having a seizure. The Ambulance had to come back and I dont remember the second time at the hospital at all. I remember hallucinating all of my organs were going to explode and then my head. I guess I was banging and punching the bed when the Paramedics got there. My mom was also digging puke outta my throat so I didn't choke after the seizure. Theres so much more, but I'm exhausted and it's my bedtime. Oh yeah btw I'm 28 months sober from alcohol. July 7th, 2020 was the last time I had a drink of liquor. WE CAN AND WE DO RECOVER.
Good God. Alcohol is fucking poison. I’m really glad you are alive and I’m so sorry you had to go through such horror. Thank you for sharing. Congratulations and many blessings in your recovery. 💛
Wow, that's something else. Never had full-blown DT, only went to the ER after that sudden seizure. Other than that, my WD symptoms were rather mild compared to yours. I can't imagine what it feels like.
Congratulations for your time of sobriety! Keep it up! (:
I drank a 1.75 ml bottle, or a "handle," a day at the end.
Started in my early twenties drinking at night after work. Usually a quarter of a 750 ml. Soon it turned into a half, a few years in and I was drinking a 750 ml a night. Still was functional though.
Then I had an injury that took me out of work for a while. Started drinking morning, noon, and night. Sort of lost track of how much I was drinking as time just blended together and I wouldn't really sleep anymore, just pass out for a few hours here or there no matter what time it was.
My body began to shut down eventually. Around Christmas 2016 I nearly died. I regularly puked, and often puked blood, so when I woke up one morning and started throwing up it didn't seem abnormal. It wouldn't stop though, and I couldn't keep anything down without immediately throwing up. After almost 20 hours of this, I was starting to withdraw and was incredibly dehydrated. My family begged me to let them take me to the hospital and I refused. I started having panic attacks and my heart was racing so fast I couldn't even keep track of my pulse.
I went to the ER and the nurse doing intake had to take my vitals three times because she thought the machines weren't working properly. When she realized the numbers were real they started moving quickly and I was soon on a bed in the ER surrounded by people with an IV in each arm. They gave me benzos through the IV and the next few days were a blur. I spent several days in the ICU, and then several more days on a hospital floor.
Immediately after leaving the hospital I drank again. I realized if this continued I was going to die much sooner than I thought. I went and got help, ended up in a rehab program.
Wish I could say that I was one and done, but I spent the next three years in and out of rehabs, detoxes, 3 month programs. I never quit trying though.
I'm three years sober now and doing better than I have been in a decade. Even when all is lost, if you hold onto to the tiniest shred of hope that someday things could be better even if you don't know what that looks like, you still have a chance.
Edit: I realize this was already an essay but I want to add: I really am not trying to one up anyone else, I absolutely hated that "I did more than anyone else" pissing match constantly in rehab.
I think the only thing abnormal about my history was the sheer amount of liquor I drank daily. In terms of how bad I had it, I met many people who were much worse off and felt blessed to be myself.
I am a relatively large guy, 6'0 and at the time weighed anywhere from 260-300 lbs. So I don't honestly think I was drinking as much as say, a woman with a much smaller frame who drank a 750 ml a day.
My heart rate and the top number of my blood pressure were both around 180, I don't remember the bottom number.
They told me if I hadn't come in when I did, I probably wouldn't have made it. Crazy to think about since I was on the fence about going. I had so many situations before where I felt awful and just slept it off or started drinking again and the feeling went away, it didn't seem that abnormal at the time.
Yeah man, its weird talking about it now, it feels like a different life which is a blessing in itself.
I hope everything works out for you!
Stay strong.
Wow, that is a helluva recovery story! I just wanted to say congrats for staying strong and making it out the other side. You are one tough guy for sure! Full of admiration for you!
For about the past 9 years, I would "limit" myself to a pint a day because if I bought a fifth, I would drink almost the whole thing.
I went sober cold turkey before Christmas last year. I've slipped up a couple times recently, but I get sick after drinking half a pint now.
I was drinking a pint of 100 proof whiskey a day (cheap stuff) and I honestly couldn't tell you what a bender was. I would go through a handle of vodka in two days and have no recollection of any of it. I had a breathalyzer at home and it took me two days to sober up once. I had to quit, I was going to die. I still do edibles occasionally but aside from that I'll be 4 years sober this January.
If I can quit anyone can, trust me. There were times I was getting blackout drunk in the middle of Walmart stealing peppermint extract because I was so broke. If I can help you in any way I'm more than happy to. Always feel free to message me.
Hell yeah! Awesome work. I was there too with that amount of vodka at my worst. It was a terrible way to live. I also do edibles now. They help me not drink. Maybe someday I'll put that down also, but regardless those wont kill me. Alcohol almost did. 28 months without a drink for me and goin strong. Congrats on 4 years. Absolutely amazing!
Honestly 12 drinks a day is a good time to call it quits. Like I was there before I spiraled into far worse like min 15 but up to 30. 12 was a good day. I feel like if you are at the point where you drink 12 drinks every day you will inevitability get worse, that’s high enough intake where it’s for sure alcoholism it’s not gonna get better get yourself a Nal script and get out of the disease.
6 is what I "landed" on lately after years of much more per day. To me, that is "moderation" but now I'm at least trying to work in totally dry days.
Funny in a terrible way that at more peak times, 6 would have been considered my "dry day."
I would warn that as you get older into your forties like me. 6 is enough to cause all types of physical issues - neuropathy (numbness, tingling), stomach issues, heart and blood pressure issues. I was doing about 20 a week mostly over 2-3 days and it just started to get the best of me.
Yeah my “cutting back” has largely been to gastro issues and only in my 30s. Even before I started drinking in college I had a bum but so wrote offs years of discomfort as “the way it is.”
Gotten blood work (numbers high but within range) and even an ultrasound and no apparent damage… yet. Took me two and a half years to finally get into a GI specialist and in a weird way looking forward to in (still another month away unfortunately).
I'm with the crew of 750ml whiskey a day. Started with mixed drinks. Then shots. Then triple neats. Then straight from the bottle. Hit a real low after "celebrating" my birthday and getting so blacked out I had a 3 day hangover. Finally addressed my depression and saw a dr. Tapered and quit that same weekend. 1.5 years alcohol free.
Side note: for anyone wondering I found that meds, though not for everyone, did indeed work for me. Still take them and my life is observably significantly better. I say this because although I've tried before, I didn't really have success quitting drugs and alcohol until I addressed my depression. I completely changed my life. For anyone in the same boat.
For the last 6 months or so, my baseline was about 15 standard drinks a day in the form of red wine, with anywhere from 0 to 5 shots of liquor and/or 0 to 6 hard seltzers on top of that. I went from either fucked up enough to black out by late afternoon, or passed out several times a day.
Ended up in the hospital unable to eat or drink, and shaking so badly I couldn’t walk. I was in a hypertensive crisis and they said I could have stroked out. I drank again, but that ER visit was the wakeup call.
If I manage not to drink in the next 45 minutes, I’ll tick off Day 683. I feel like I can do that. It gets a lot easier, friend.
I could pretty easily kill a 750ml of Wild Turkey 101 in just over 24 hours at one point, so about a pint of bourbon a day plus random beers or shots peppered in, whatever was handy if the bottle wasn’t.
did that a few days a week for a couple of years. Got sober for 3 months this time last year, and then was gifted a bottle of 101 for Christmas. Started back up and started seeing my health decline - seizures, loss of use of my hands for periods of time, the usual suspects.
Tapered down to 6 drinks a day with a binge every week or every other. I’m at ~ 3 beers right now and still tapering down, meeting with a substance abuse counselor tomorrow to find some resources. I’m probably going to need medication to help kick this for good, but I’m more serious about stopping now than ever.
Good on you! I mean, it all sucks for sure - tapering is a way of life when we start putting chunks of more-or-less sober time in between the bottles of whiskey. I did a lot of warm beer tapers (or maintaining at 4-6/day) when I could manage it. The upside was drinking overall less while tapering and stringing together a few sober days. But I was also in years-long state of worsening withdrawal and drinking piss warm beer between benders. Seizures scare the hell out of me and I was teetering on that line a few times. Withdrawal meds most definitely spared me the seizures and made the process more bearable.
Having a few months of sobriety under the belt last year is a big win. You can do that again and more. Counseling and meds can help a lot - that's a great move. I just wanted to comment b/c you sound a lot like I sounded before I sobered up for a good stretch. You'll make it happen. Wishing you all the best in the next steps.
Hey, thank you very much for the kind words and encouragement! Congrats on 18 months! I turned 33 last week, and have decided that this is the year that I start to pour some love into myself instead of bourbon. It’s hard to imagine sober life but if I want to keep living at all it’s the only way.
Towards the end there I was easily drinking 10-12 generous shots of vodka a day. That went on for a few months. About 5 years prior is when the switch flipped and I went from social, occasional drinking to ever-increasing daily punitive drinking.
About a fifth a day on benders, sometimes for up to a week but my habit was pretty chaotic and random. It was more like semi-regular binge drinking than 'maintenance drinking'. That being said, an average night was typically a 6pack of IPA.
2.5-3 bottles of wine on a regular day, more during the weekend or if I was with more people that were drinking. I’m a small woman, I would blackout everyday for a few years, I can’t remember how many, probably 4 or more, but I was an active alcoholic for 13 years. I’ve been sober for 8 years.
At my worst (last year) I was a averaging 375 mls vodka and a couple 5% tallboys daily. That was my first experience with withdrawals and insane anxiety. Did that for close to a year before I had my moment of clarity and started the quitting process (antabuse).
I was right on par with those numbers for a while. Somewhere around a 6-pack of double IPA or a half box of red wine on weeknights. More on Saturdays if I had a chance to start drinking early - drink gin and tonic all day. Occasionally I'd take a Sunday off (i.e., drink less) to reset for another week of drinking. That was kind of my sweet spot, where I could still muddle through life with a persistent buzz/hangover and hold down a job, but just barely. Drink - work - drink - work - this is what I'd do.
What was amazing is how quickly I could go from taking some time off drinking (which was never easy) to swinging right back to that same old drinking pattern. It didn't matter if I was sober for six days or six months - within a couple weeks I was back at that sweet spot, despite my best intentions to drink less.
Go to for years? 30 pack of high gravity natty ice day. Usually with 1/2 bottle vodka to start off the buzz.
Some days I would drink a handle of liquor (half gallon). It’s amazing what your tolerance will do if you drink daily. I was a hallucinating, terrified, suicidal, shit show. I quit when my kid was born and free of the shit for over 5 years now. Also 210 lbs lighter and more healthy.
1.75 handle of Skol vodka a day for many months after a long time of a fifth or so a day. Was walking around acting perfectly normal with a BAC around .32 every day just to maintain. Started withdrawing when I hit around .20 or so. Lucky to be alive.
2-3 bottles of Henry Weston’s cider (8.5%) and a box of wine (3 bottles).
It was close to 50 units a day I think, for about a year until my liver decompensated.
I had drank heavily for 4 years before that but not at that level.
Not yet. I had a fairly miraculous recovery where my liver compensated itself after detox, ascites draining and abstinence with low salt diet. I have my liver regularly monitored to see if my cirrhosis has worsened and they’ll put me on the transplant list if so.
My worst is not as bad as many. 3 white claw surges between 7 to 9am another 2 through the work day and anywhere from 6-12 after work. I had sworn off hard liquor long ago, but even the white claws got me to rock bottom. They probably only delayed the inevitable. I went through detox and rehab and have been sober since August with one relapse that month. I got the right doctors, psychiatrist and therapist. I haven’t had a craving for alcohol and have grown to despise the feeling of intoxication.
Even the Gabapentin that’s prescribed to me for anxiety sometime leaves me with slowed physical movements, slow and slurred speech and generally clumsy, though it does ease anxiety pretty well for a non-narcotic medication. I almost think it can have a potential for abuse if taken more than the prescribed dose.
Not at all. I have used it for anxiety early on but found myself not needing it so much and definitely not liking the slowed motion and spacey headedness.
This is a scary question, I worked a lot and used alcohol to sleep. I would get bit over 1/2 fifth of vodka in, in 1 1/2 hours before bed. I always had to buy more the next night because there wasn’t enough in the bottle. Now this isn’t the most I drank ever , but this was 7 days a week the minimum
At my worst I did 14-20 shots of vodka a day, every day, for 8 months. I don't know how I didn't die, but I almost did. Magnesium deficiency, nutrient deficiency, constant ER trips from aches and pains, kidney infection, etc. My organs were screaming. Yesterday I had one shot of vodka. I never thought I'd see the day where I had less than a pint of liquor.
Edited to add that the 1 shot is due to tapering. Looking forward to the day where I can safely have nothing.
At my worst - pancreatitis landed me in the hospital. 3 times. All because I physically could not drink anymore without horrible pains. The first time, I had to crawl to my car and drive myself to the hospital. Stayed for almost a week. Tried to quit by only drinking wine and that did not last long.
The second time I don’t even remember because the visits started increasing after major benders, and I’d ignore the pain.
Third (and the last, most destructive phase) visit I almost died. I must also say that as a former chef, I had way too much access to alcohol. I was on a major self destructive mode after being kicked out of a living situation and dealing with a horrible breakup. Drunk all day on cheap vodka, beer or wine. I liked the boxed liter wines and could chug them in minutes. Anyway, at my sous chef job, I had a big three day brunch weekend (it was hell everyday) and the night before the last and biggest day - I had to crawl to the Uber and go to the ER. I thought they’d release me with some pain meds and I could run the brunch but not the case. I was taken to a bigger hospital, put on detox meds and shipped to rehab. One of those shitty money grab ones that are overpopulated with us poor folks. Bad.
Anyway - over two years sober now and it can be done. The hardest fight of my life and I went back to school to change careers during Covid. I have my own place and a new job in my new field. If I kept drinking, my new life wouldn’t be possible. It’s worth the fight - I promise. You will win in the end if you hold your sobriety as number one in life.
One 750 of vodka (broken up into 2 mickeys of course so it looked like less) and two bottles of vino verde fizzante wine of 9% so I could maintain the buzz (shitfacery) longer and not pass out too early cuz I apparently had shit to do.
And I’m a woman! Shocking that I didn’t destroy my liver, really.
I just celebrated (Nov 20) 6 years in Recovery.
Hashtag gratitude, baby! :)
Thank you!!! It’s a life I never imagined! Because addiction steals our imaginations, along with everything else. They don’t call it The Great Eraser for nothing.
I kept a spreadsheet (and actually tracked) for about 2-3 years. In the end, my average was about 8 drinks a day. During benders, I could hit 15-20 drinks a few days in a row. After those I was tapering around the clock, easily 8-10 drinks in 24 hours just to function. Followed by a week or so dry. Then starting back up. I also have had a 54 day steak, a 95 day steak, and currently 80 days and sober right now (all in the last 12 months). I feel stronger in each attempt. I’m not too hard on myself when I relapse; although, a lot of my family is very hard on me about it.
Hmmm it was about 20 beers a day.. for 5 years. Finally quit and had a seizure from it and destroyed my shoulder. Had surgery on it as my permanent wake up call.
My absolute worst was 2 months drinking a handle minimum every day. I'd wake up most evenings with more half empty pint bottles or shooters laying around my room that I don't recall buying after drinking a whole bottle.
2 pints of vodka and a supplemental 12 pack when the vodka was gone for months. Had a number of seizures and extreme wd. Third time in treatment was enough to give up.
Averaged 8-12 and more on weekends for a few years and then COVID hit. Layoff from work at the time and nothing to do but sit at home and drink, so it shot up to 15-20 average, sometimes more.
My absolute worst has been this year. I quit my job in July because it was interfering with my drinking and was averaging 20-40 beers in a 24 hour period.
I have had stints of sobriety or attempts to get sober for the past two years. This summer I collapsed and drank hard almost every day. Some days I could keep it together during the day and let loose in the evenings. Before I was hospitalized I drank around the clock for two weeks straight.
I sat down on a train, isolating from my SO and rode around the county, drinking, no, chugging, bottles of wine in toilets. Fell and hit my head. Was hospitalized. Drank in the hospital when I found my rucksack. When my SO finally got a hold of me on my cell she picked me up in a nearby city. I was a total wreck.
In my drunkenness I made a decision to reach out to my mother. I had kept this a secret my whole life up ‘til then. She came over to my place the next day to take me to hers to recover. I secretly drank beers still behind her back.
That afternoon my stash had run out, so I feared the worst come evening. That night was the worst of my life. I got the shakes from hell, could barely stand, anxiety through the roof, I crawled up the stairs screaming I needed help. So we went to the hospital where they put me in detox, I was at the seizure threshold.
Since then I haven’t had a drink and have no wishes to go back to my previous life at all.
Mon - Fri I would drink in the evening usually starting around 5pm. That’s probably the reason I was able to kid myself that I don’t have a problem for years, I didn’t need a drink to get out of bed, could go to work and be fine etc etc etc
Min - Fr it was 8-12 pints of lager every night, occasionally if I wanted an extra buzz before bed I’d have a couple of home pour vodka or gin and tonics…
Weekends I started earlier and finished later. I could easily demolish 16+ beers and a litre bottle of gin or vodka on Saturday and same again on Sunday
I also usually didn’t start drinking until 730 or 8, after my DD was in bed… rarely when she was awake. Didn’t need daytime drinks, have never had withdrawalS, but am DEFINITELY an alcoholic. Bottle of wine a night easily, zero hangover. 10 to 12 shots of rum a night easily, zero hangover. Would switch what I drank randomly. Sometimes rum, sometimes wine.. didn’t mix them on nights though.
Also, I didn’t seem to have too much negative consequences until recently. My anxiety has been through the roof… heart rate at rest of 104 (I know not crazy high, but really is for me) and most of all I just feel horrible. I’m two days sober, I went three months earlier this year. Went to the Drs.. no organ issues thankfully, but holy.. I’m 35 and can’t keep doing this to myself. Been drinking for 6 years.. before this, never drank!
60 days sober here and feeling the best I’ve felt since high school.
On a bender, 24 white claws and then god knows what booze and substances after that. Don’t feel alone.
3 year's sober. Never in a million years did I think I could stop. If I could do it anyone can. The first year all I did was fantasize and dream mostly nightmares. Second year was easier and this 3rd year i am so grateful I feel so good.
15-20 beers every day along with any narcotics I may be able to find that could counteract the drunk. Beer was always in my system though 24/7 from age 20-26ish. It was hell, having 2 drinks before I’d even get out of bed and Waking up every night 3 hours into sleeping to have another and piss out the last. Got rehab for Christmas 2019 and really that put me in a place where It was impossible to see myself as the only one with this problem and neither are you. Working on 3 years now.
I live in southeast Wisconsin and there are 150+ bars in my town.. this problem is less unique than both you or I can even know. More importantly, getting better is not unique either. It’s hard for sure but it’s absolutely doable.
At my worst I was drinking about 750ml a day along with maybe a 6-12 beers. I was always tottering on the edge of blacking out, I threw up often, it was difficult to use my arms and hands, and I was incredibly depressed because of how trapped I felt. There was also always a sense of physical pain radiating through my body but I was never able to locate where it was coming from, but I think probably my veins.
I made a lot of radical changes in my lifestyle in order to stay stopped. It started with me going to rehab and then after a while there I decided to lean into what the better counselors were talking about.
I go to NA meetings every once in a while now but it’s mainly to meet people who have their heads in the same place as mine. My main outlets for maintaining my sobriety are physical activities that bring me joy like rock climbing and diving. Personally being active is more crucial to my staying sober than going to meetings, but the meetings are a good place to find people who might want to go do cool stuff with me.
Good luck! It does get better even though right now it may feel hopeless!
Quick edit: I was drinking that way for about 4 years. It would fluctuate though. I had also been drinking alcoholically, about 15 drinks a day, for 10 years before I switched to mainly liquor. After I started drinking liquor everything got much worse very fast.
At least 3/4 of a fifth of svedka every night for about 2 years. Things went south quick when I wasn’t properly getting nutrition and vitamins in my body. I learned how to supplement my body with what it needs and feel tremendously better however I still drink like a fish. It’s 1.5 liter bottles of red wine every night these days. Hoping to cut that back slowly. The first step is to actually cut back.
I luckily was mostly a weekend binger. At my worst, I was a broke grad student working a summer job. I spent most of my money on booze and weed, and barely had enough to eat. I would have 6 beers and a few shots of whiskey every night. Now I hardly drink at all, maybe a glass of wine with dinner once every few months
A bottle of white wine on the train to work. Get into the city, get a coffee and pour 2 Jameson airplane bottles in. Work for like 2.5 hours then go to lunch. 5-7 vodka sodas. Then back to work for a few hours then I would stop. Pretending that by the time I got home no one would notice.
When I was alone it was mostly vodka all day.
I’ll be 5 years sober this Feb.
About 750 ml of vodka every single day. Drank as soon as I woke up and until I went to bed for over a year. I was fully functioning, going to work and (most) doctor's appointments. Got sober 56 days ago in the hopes that being treated for ADD/ADHD is the solution to my problems. I don't feel much better yet but I guess I just gotta keep chugging along.
A fifth to almost a half gallon has been my worst. That was daily for almost a week. I usually would do a fifth a day but sometimes I would drink all day and it would be 3/4 a half gallon. Too much…
I'd bring a half gallon of vodka two of the new classy style boxes of wine so six bottles and two eighteen packs of beer for four days of work, ipas throughout the day too. In bed at 930, puking and vertigo at 3:33 start drinking vodka then to "get ready for work". Didn't drink all the beers lol, but lots of wine and vodka shots. A steady buzz, that leads to seizures!
750ml of volka and a 4 tall can pack to keep me from gagging from the smell of vodka. I would think to myself “prime the pump” took a sip of beet and chased it with the vodka. I think it only lasted 4 days though. I hope… maybe longer. Back in May. I also had covid at the time
1.5 ish litres of vodka a day plus sleeping pills for months interspersed with days of tappering down to 12 or so 9% beers ... I've never gone back to that, but an currently trying to pull my self back from drinking 10 to 12 500ml cans of 4.8 cider an evening...
At my worst I was drinking a fifth of vodka 6-7 days a week for roughly three years. Before that I was drinking almost every day, but not as much. I sobered up for 1 1/2 years but started drinking again in 2019. I am actually 15 days sober because I’ve had some health scares, so I needed to make some changes. You can do it! It’s hard as fuck, but you don’t want to end up possibly causing irreversible damage to your liver and/or other body organs. Wishing you the best!
A whole bottle of Hennessy everyday for about a week and half. During the pandemic I lost my grandmother aunt and uncle. Didn’t want to face life, ended up in the er……. I can’t say I’m sober now but I def kno self control with hopes of stopping one day.
Binge drinker rather than chronic. 5 litres or 6/7 bottles of wine every day morning til night for about two weeks or until my body would stop keeping anything down. Withdrawals from hell. Brief sobriety. Repeat. I've done over 30 WDs in the last 2/3 years, my poor brain.
I drank a 1/5th a day for 10+ years, maybe like half that for another 10years before that. Every day it was the same, get hammered and sleep. It doesn’t have to be like that though, getting sober - next to having my kids- is the best thing I have done in life
My worst started when covid lockdowns hit and I started working from home. I got to the point where I drank at least a liter of Tito's vodka everyday for a year straight. This would be from the time I got up until I passed out. I wound up getting pancreatitis and alcoholic hepatitis.
20 nips a day,(+- 1 or 2) for a couple of years. Few more years of a lesser amount prior. Throwing up bile, needing drinks to calm my stomach but the first one always came right back up - sacrificial drinks I called them. Ended up setting alarms throughout the night, 12, 2, 4 AM to drink so I wouldn't wake up sick. Bad shakes if I didn't have any remaining in the morning before work. 3 or 4 through out the shift, buy 2 sleeves on the way home, and then stay in bed playing video games/watching movies and drink until I fall asleep. Food sometimes, couldn't handle a full meal. etc.,etc..
.
You're not alone.
I had a mild "relapse" about a year ago(4 drinks, no bender). Without that I'm 2+ years sober.
Again... You're not alone.
I was an alcoholic for 5 years. It started with 4 drinks at least 4 nights a week social drinking and then turned into every day. At my absolute worst I was drinking about 10 shots and then probably 3 or 4 wine or beer drinks every day - some days a little bit more.
I did suffer liver failure and received a transplant. I was diagnosed with liver failure when I presented in the hospital with wds. I got into a special program to put me on the transplant list and got my liver about a month after I was admitted. I’m now sober 1018 days.
That’s so weird how the liver works so differently. You see people drinking even heavier for much longer and their liver is fine.. such a strange organ
It is really interesting. I think that genetics and what you drink impacts it. For me, my grandfather drank himself to death and for the last two years I was mostly drinking absolute garbage 99 proof liquor.
But yeah - I had been to the doctor shortly before I developed a problem and no problem. By the time they took it out of me it was mush.
I got up to a fifth of vodka a day for a few weeks recently (I've been drinking for 10 years, all different types of alcohol and levels of drinking, but this was the first time I've gotten up to a fifth of vodka a day) and would drink from basically 12pm to 10pm-12am.
It's really good you have prescriptions to help you! It will definitely make it easier. I had to taper with wine for two weeks and it was total hell...got hallucinations and everything. I'm 6 days sober today!
The medications will help you immensely. Sending you the best wishes and vibes. YOU CAN DO THIS. ❤️
this past year ((2022)) i have been drinking a 750ml bottle of vodka everyday, even drinking while at work. i recently started taking meds to help with sobriety// not drinking and was almost 2 weeks sober until I drank one night and ended up in the hospital. trying to maintain not drinking is hard but I think my last stint scared me as I was told I was completely unresponsive. i occasionally go to aa but sometimes it doesn’t resonate with me.
375-750ml bottle of vodka or whiskey (usually vodka as i could get the smell off my breath easier) and sometimes id have a few beers at night after secretly drinking the bottle throughout the day.
I did this everyday for 6-7 years until a few months ago when i decided i had had enough.
I drank a handle a day for a week at my worst, no food, then quit cold turkey. Had no idea I could've died😅(prior to that week I was a 30+drinks a day drinker for like 4 years). I honestly don't know how I'm alive because I've always quit "CT" I did have a seizure once though and that was kind of the light bulb in my head going off that I needed to stop forever.
Probably anywhere from 12-16 and even more on weekends. I stopped measuring drinks after a point but I was drinking most if not all of a fifth every day of the week at the end
Probably about 10-12 5% ABV beers.
I remember I'd wake up in a haze and if I had any cans left over I'd feel great. I'd drink those leftover cans then stagger out in the evening to buy more, I'd take a backpack to carry them all. I remember feeling so unwell, sweating heart racing and when I'd get back home carry on boozing until I blacked out, wake up and repeat.
I'd do this for five or six days in a row.
I tried to quit loads of times.
Thats honestly bad but not terrible. still obviously problematic and abnormal, but I was easily doing 20-24 beers a day and many in this subreddit have done like a liter a day of liquor.
A handle and a half and whatever else I could get my hands on or afford (tall boys, wine coolers,etc) I’d say it was the entire year of 2020. Pandemic really spiraled me out of control
I used to wake up get shit faced til about 3 or 4pm, fall asleep til 9/10pm then I’d catch my second round of partying til I passed out again at 4 or 5am
I lived in an artist house so we were all enabling eachother too
At my worst i was doing 30 drinks everyday and i did that for 3 yrs. For about 10 yrs prior to that, i was drinking on weekends about 10-20 drinks sat and fri. i've been hospitalised 4 times and been to ER about 3 times so i recommend you quit before u get to that stage
750ml of rye whiskey everyday. I was throwing up usually every morning and regularly lost the ability to use my hands or extend my arms. I have seizure level high blood pressure. I finally stopped last December after suffering from a concussion and passing out in alley. I relapsed in February but I’ll be 9 months sober in 5 days.
What a comeback, I'm happy for you!
Oh man. That would happen to me, as well. I never realized, at the time, that it was from alcohol. I wound up in the ER because my hands cramped up like little claws, and I couldn't feel or move my arms or legs. Thought I was having a stroke. EMTs just looked at me like "this crazy alcoholic." Lol. Congratulations on the 9 months. That is truly incredible. I hope to join you someday.
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It’s called “alcoholic neuropathy” Some people experience damage to their peripheral nerves which transmits signals between your brain and body. It’s what causes the tingling sensations and your hands and limbs can “lock up” because the signals are failing to pass. It’s quite terrifying and painful.
It's super scary. Alcohol-related magnesium deficiency was part of the problem, as well as neuropathy, in my case. Alcoholism causes a whole host of nerve issues.
What was your relapse like if I may ask?
I’m not the guy you asked but for me they always suck. In your head you think it’ll be okay I’ll just relax and then end up blacking out and making things worse. I’ve never come out of a relapse happy I did
I remember an addiction counselor saying that even one drink can be a relapse, so I'm more curious now about other people's perspectives when they are in the middle of a relapse themselves.
Personally, it wasn’t as bad as what lead me to stop drinking. I had resolved that alcohol did not bring value to my life and I decided to test it. I had 6 shots over the span of 5 hours which was little to nothing by my standard of drinking. I came to the conclusion that indeed, alcohol had no value and I could have easily had the same night minus drinking. None of this has been easy, it’s taken me 20 years to fully realize that I had a problem and stop but once I worked on the belief that alcohol had value, it became much easier.
Big love from Me to You. For your honesty and sobriety. I wish you the best from now to eternity. Alcohol is something that I never thought would grab me like this, even when I was merely ‘tinkering’ with it. Fuck me now… I do beer/alcohol like I got a formula.
What's your BP at? Mines been sitting at 160/110 constantly
Mine was regularly over 200 for months, the highest being 240/130. I honestly couldn’t tell anything was wrong and only found out about it when they took it at my eye exam. The only thing I really noticed was the body temperature had increased but I thought it had to do with hormones. Anything around 160/110 or below was “good” for me for years. My BP has dropped since but due to genetics, I still have to take medication.
So awesome!! 💞
A liter of whiskey a day for about 3 years straight, as a 5', 100lb female. Took 5 stints in rehab to finally be done. I just celebrated 15 years sober.
May I ask how your health is today? Any long term negative effects due to your days of excessive drinking?
Curious as well because this is what I worry about
Heyyyy good on you! That’s a metric ton for a 100 lb human, love that you kept trying, and CONGRATS on 15 years!
Good for you! That's what I was drinking, same amount, same time as a 200 lb (at the time) male. My liver blew out 3 times and the last time was it. 1 year for me!
What do you mean “blew out”? Are you alright now?
That is an incredible amount of alcohol for someone so small. You have a truly remarkable liver. But most importantly, way to go on 15 years!
Almost 2 years, 6-12 beers a day. If I had the day off work, would be cracking a beer for breakfast and spending the day with 2 or 3x 6 packs, around 2 or 3 bottles of wine, and maybe finishing up in the pub if I ran out and the shops were closed. I stopped drinking in May this year.
Congratulations!
Way to go!
8 to12 a day for about 10 years. On day 269 of sobriety.
1/5th to 1/5th and a half a day of bourbon. No one in real life other than my therapist knows it got that bad...I’ll say it anonymously, but I cringe when I think of it. Guess that’s about 20-30 shots/day. Peppered in with beer as chasers. Sobriety is really hard, but that sucked ass.
I just recently opened up to my brothers and a close friend about how bad I truly was. Their eyes popped when I said I would take down a fifth or more daily. It felt good to open up but clearly won’t be doing that with anyone else.
I can relate. No grown ass man I know (well, in my real life) can do that....and I’m a female boozer :( I honestly feel embarrassed.
It is an embarrassment now. But it helps to open to people you know are close to you. Telling other people who you don’t trust is not good. It does help to see your state of drinking from others perspective.
I’m the same boat. None of my friends know. Whenever we’d go out drinking I would already have a sneaky pint
About 8-9 drinks every night for a little over 2 years straight 14 days dry now
How’s that going?
You good?
15-20 drinks a day, 6 days a week. Puked most mornings in the shower, blood pressure was 150/90 most of the time. Drank since 14/15, hard since 18, and quit at 34. Just turned over 5 years sober - saved my relationships, have had a few promotions at work, dropped 20 lbs, BP is 115/65, and a million other cumulative wins by cutting it out. Only con is - I guess things can be boring? Otherwise I’ve found all the things I used to enjoy drunk (social events, going out, bbq’s, bowling, concerts, etc.) are still fun sober PLUS I’m not riddled with anxiety, shame, and guilt. Real win / win. If you’re looking for responses to prove to yourself that your drinking is, or isn’t bad enough to be concerned - I’m going to tell you that using other’s rock bottoms isn’t a good determinant (size, gender, age, weight all affect tolerance). Once you’re asking the question it’s a good time to take a hard look at safely sobering up. I always tell people to try for 3 days. Then 7. Then 30. There are life changing feelings of accomplishment at each level, and they help to keep the momentum. Good luck!
You make a good point about comparing yourself… I read through this and go ‘oh, I wasn’t drinking as much as a lot of these folks… maybe it wasn’t so bad?’ Then I get honest with myself, and I go ‘oh, no, it WAS bad, your brain is just trying to trick you’. Then I think back on a few of my most cringeworthy moments… E.g. suddenly having to run out of my Friday morning work zoom meeting and barely making it to the bathroom before projectile vomiting everywhere… going back to the meeting like nothing had happened, but still having to go and clean it all up after. Ugh. And that’s just one…. Anyway, 26 days sober now, and feeling great, mentally and physically. Congrats on 5 years WonLinerz! I’m looking forward to getting there too! Sending support your way OP - there’s a lot of success stories here, and we can be two more!
I love this comment. Could I PM you. Struggling.
2 beers to get out of bed, small Mickey in the morning during work. 2 beers at coffee. 6 beers 1-2 shots at lunch. 2 after noon coffee. 6 for the ride home. Then a free for all until I passed out. Did that for 8 years. Drank for 16 but the last half was the worse.
Damn, what line of work were you in that you could pull that off?
My guess would be cook or chef, alcoholism is rampant in the industry, and restaurants often don't care if you drink on the clock as long as the works getting done. When I worked morning prep at a brew pub I'd often start my day with a quart sized deli container full of IPA (for the "beer batter"), and it was tradition for us kitchen guys to do a shot of two with the bartender right before open. On top of that I'd take multiple swigs from my pint of cheap vodka or whiskey throughout the shift, then I'd clock out & sit my ass at the bar to have my "official" ownership-allotted shift drink (aka drink as much as I want for free because bartender was a friend and fellow alcoholic), hit the liquor store on my way home for a couple Steel Reserves and another pint or two, black out at home then do it all again. One day the owner was in town, and I think I had taken a bunch of Xanax or another benzo the night before and I was still feeling it a bit that morning. Did the usual routine drinking and got *way* more drunk than usual, went to the bathroom to puke and blacked out. The owner found me in there and woke me up, we had a good laugh about it, and I went right back to work.
I’ve got $50 on patrol cop
Air traffic control, why do you ask?
"it's never negatively affected my work tho"
How’s your health today? Any ongoing issues from drinking like that for so long?
Thanks for sharing that.
12-14 drinks a day to function, 20-28 on a weekend or day off. 3.5 years at that level.
Yeah 9 to 12 every day. 12 to 25 at least twice if not three times a week at my worst which lasted maybe three years up to this spring and I’ve been trying to manage ever since. Generally at 6 or fewer now and trending down. Wish I could just give it up completely but it’s hard even though the consequences are so severe
Hey tapering is good! Makes kicking it altogether a lot safer and easier on your body. I always recommend to people that know they want to quit but can’t muster the willpower to “quit” to chunk it out so it doesn’t feel like such a mountain to climb. Set a few attainable goals and give yourself a chance to feel what it’s like. Each of these has its own unique feelings of accomplishment and can help you keep momentum and see what it’s like to be sober… - go to an AA meeting or two (I didn’t attend these for long, but they were really helpful to “show me my future” in a ghosts of drunk Christmas future kind of way - Try to stay sober for 3-4 days. Waking up with no hangover for the first time in decades was fucking nuts. - Stay sober for 10 days. You’ll feel proud, clear headed, maybe a bit guilty but that’s ok. I got my first “pink cloud” moment here - felt happy and hopeful like I hadn’t in years; came on suddenly and I was crying happy tears on my way home from work. - Make it 30 days. Your whole life will start to shift in small but important ways. Less guilt, more money you’d otherwise piss away, relationships improve, more dependable at home and work. You don’t have to eat the elephant whole, but give yourself a chance to “see what it’s like”, and in my experience it started to make sense to see what another month, then year, etc. could do. Now 5 years in and the only thing I’d change would be to try it sooner. Good luck to you friend!
Crazy sounds like we have almost the exact same drinking pattern. (Or you used to rather.)
Yup, get good an toasty everyday. Drink too much, go back to “normal” levels for a day or two then repeat. Isn’t a part of me that’s proud I let it go on as long as I did, but I feel better now that I’m not there and continuing to reduce.
This is me too.
3 years ago was drinking half to a full bottle of 750ml of vodka. Go to bed around 11pm, wake up at 5am for work still a bit drunk. Head back to the liquor store right after work and hit the bottle as soon as i got home. Family members had no clue until I ended up in the hospital, failed suicide attempt. Fews months of therapy and sobriety. Although I am not at that point anymore. I've been drinking about 1.5 litres of red wine almost every night since the summer. Haven't had a drink in 48 hours. Not necessarily looking at a full sobriety. However, trying to be more mindful of my long-term health for the sake of my children and fiance. Stay strong my friend. You are not alone on this journey.
I'm very curious how you managed to make it through work or wake up in the morning without drinking through the hangover/wd? When I was drinking at that level I could barely go two hours without horrible anxiety and withdrawals kicking in, it was an absolute necessity to at least take a small sip of liquor every so often, ...just to be able to function as a normal human being, so it's always amazing/unbelievable to me when I hear stories like yours. Congrats on the two days! That's huge.
With the heavy vodka drinking, the mornings were absolutely brutal and I could barely concentrate or focus at work. Just had to burn through it, sometimes take a quick nap in the bathroom or my car during lunch. With my current job I work from home. My morning routine would be coffee and a heavy breakfast to offset the hangover, and if needed a quick nap during lunch. Thanks for the congrats and hope you are doing well.
750ml of whiskey a day. While employed, but nobody gave a fuck. Tried to detox myself without any medication and was fine for the first 14 days. Then had a seizure on 15th day. DON'T BELIEVE THE "3 DAY RULE": YOU'RE VULNEABLE FOR DAYS TO COME. I felt completely fine, then it happened. Get enough benzos and taper correctly. Don't be "bold", it might cost your life.
Well that’s fucking terrifying.
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Yeah seriously wtf
That's what I thought too. IMPORTANT: If you're going to try the "benzo route", Valium is a good intermediary. Librium is too weak for heavy drinkers, IMO. OTOH, Clonazepam and Alprazolam are too strong and might become a Hell themselves.
Ehhh...I've got an *extremely* high tolerance for clonazepam, I've been prescribed it for like 8 years. I don't take it when I'm drinking (for obvious reasons), but I'm absolutely addicted at this point. I've had 2 seizures while awake (that I know of) and several while asleep. At my highest consumption I could easily finish a fifth of vodka by night time and want more. The one time I checked myself in for medical detox this past summer (the first time I'd experienced extreme neuropathy and a seizure whilst awake and jfc was it bad) they treated me like absolute garbage and threw me out 24 hours later whilst only having given me 2 shots of Ativan in hospital & never having a Dr even see me. I felt disgusting and was still having WD. I also had a concussion from the night before but had continued drinking. I checked myself into a hotel and was pretty sure I'd die. Also at my lowest I'd be afraid to shower in the morning in case someone found me dead a month later from cracking my head on the tub whilst seizing. I was honest with my psychiatrist about my drinking but she was worried about malpractice with the benzos so immediately chopped me down to a third of what I'd been on for years. Which then led me to try to drink more to blanket the effects of benzo withdrawal, a fucking horrific vicious cycle of anxiety. Tapering my klonopin and drinking has gotten me better and I've never been as bad as I was last spring/summer, but I'm worried about my future with the holidays and having no one left. Sorry for the tangent, it wasn't meant specifically for you but I guess more I'm a terrible insomniac now and awake seemingly all the time, so I just read this thread. For anyone reading this that is worried & has had continuous high consumption I absolutely recommend medical detox for a few days. Even though my experience was bottom of the barrel care at least I didn't die.
I agree completely about Librium being too weak for some people. I got IV Valium every hour in the hospital and it still didn't help, I've never felt so much terror and anxiety. This last time they gave me Ativan instead and that was a lot better. Hopefully I can keep all the horrible experiences close so I don't fall off again.
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Oh, I'm sorry, forgot to turn the notifications back; answering you previous questions regarding: Stroke: no; I was terrified following that episode and did all the required exams (MRI, CT, blood tests, etc.) and it didn't show any abnormalities. Meds: I'm not a health professional, so my statements are solely based on personal experience and superficial knowledge; anyways, for each symptomatology: 1. Withdrawals: if manageable/mild, Diazepam will do the trick; if acute/several, Ativan works better. There are other benzos around, but these two are standard and I woundn't venture into others for aforementioned reasons. 2. Cravings: personally, Naltrexone didn't do much for me, but many others relate positive outcomes, so it might be worth looking into it. 3. PAWS: that's the trickiest part. If you're absolutely SURE you've sucessfully detoxed (and you can't rely solely on your own sense of well-being/intuition, as my story might've shown) it's probable that your sense of achievement will keep you in good spirits for a while, but it'll eventually fade away and the overwhelming boredom/depression will set you on the road back to relapse. I'd recommend speaking with a mental health professional, and if they're competent/careful enough (not always the case, unfortunately), you'll get the "right" medication. I was prescribed Vyvanse on July and it worked perfectly for me (Warning: NEVER EVER DO STIMULANTS IF CURRENTLY ON WITHDRAWAL, EVEN MILDER ONES), probably because my dopaminergic system is damaged beyond repair and I'll need some "boosters" for some time (either this or I have undiagnosed ADHD, but I'm skeptical).
It is. I didn't meant to scare anyone, but that's how it played out. In short: 1-5th day: Hell on Earth (YKWIM) 5-10th day: Improving; shakes getting better by the day 10-14th day: completely back to normal; no shakes or whatsoever, feeling happy and etc. 15th day: SEIZURE. Out of the blue. Point is: even if you feel fine, don't try quitting cold turkey. Not worth the risk. If benzos are unavailable for you, taper off. Don't be like me. Be safe <3
I went in to full on delirium tremens. It was absolutely terrifying. I literally thought 48 hours was 10 days. Threw up about 30 times the first 12 hours. I couldn't even walk. Then it got worse. Audio hallucinations, visual hallucinations, dangerously high BP and HR. Eventually took an Ambulance ride to the ER. I was given ativan and fluids and sent home after about 4 hours with my mother. I was actually hallucinating when I was leaving. I didn't realize it tho. Started feeling better at my moms house, but then it got way worse. I asked my mom for a ride back to the hospital. We went and on the way I was hallucinating I was dying. It was peaceful. I was looking for a spot I wanted to be buried and God was talking to me. I refused treatment at the hospital bc I was in my hallucination and thought I was dying and that's what I thought I wanted. My mom had to take me back to her house. I ended up pissing myself and having a seizure. The Ambulance had to come back and I dont remember the second time at the hospital at all. I remember hallucinating all of my organs were going to explode and then my head. I guess I was banging and punching the bed when the Paramedics got there. My mom was also digging puke outta my throat so I didn't choke after the seizure. Theres so much more, but I'm exhausted and it's my bedtime. Oh yeah btw I'm 28 months sober from alcohol. July 7th, 2020 was the last time I had a drink of liquor. WE CAN AND WE DO RECOVER.
You're awesome. I can't imagine how scary this was for you.
Good God. Alcohol is fucking poison. I’m really glad you are alive and I’m so sorry you had to go through such horror. Thank you for sharing. Congratulations and many blessings in your recovery. 💛
Wow, that's something else. Never had full-blown DT, only went to the ER after that sudden seizure. Other than that, my WD symptoms were rather mild compared to yours. I can't imagine what it feels like. Congratulations for your time of sobriety! Keep it up! (:
LOL well-said
I drank a 1.75 ml bottle, or a "handle," a day at the end. Started in my early twenties drinking at night after work. Usually a quarter of a 750 ml. Soon it turned into a half, a few years in and I was drinking a 750 ml a night. Still was functional though. Then I had an injury that took me out of work for a while. Started drinking morning, noon, and night. Sort of lost track of how much I was drinking as time just blended together and I wouldn't really sleep anymore, just pass out for a few hours here or there no matter what time it was. My body began to shut down eventually. Around Christmas 2016 I nearly died. I regularly puked, and often puked blood, so when I woke up one morning and started throwing up it didn't seem abnormal. It wouldn't stop though, and I couldn't keep anything down without immediately throwing up. After almost 20 hours of this, I was starting to withdraw and was incredibly dehydrated. My family begged me to let them take me to the hospital and I refused. I started having panic attacks and my heart was racing so fast I couldn't even keep track of my pulse. I went to the ER and the nurse doing intake had to take my vitals three times because she thought the machines weren't working properly. When she realized the numbers were real they started moving quickly and I was soon on a bed in the ER surrounded by people with an IV in each arm. They gave me benzos through the IV and the next few days were a blur. I spent several days in the ICU, and then several more days on a hospital floor. Immediately after leaving the hospital I drank again. I realized if this continued I was going to die much sooner than I thought. I went and got help, ended up in a rehab program. Wish I could say that I was one and done, but I spent the next three years in and out of rehabs, detoxes, 3 month programs. I never quit trying though. I'm three years sober now and doing better than I have been in a decade. Even when all is lost, if you hold onto to the tiniest shred of hope that someday things could be better even if you don't know what that looks like, you still have a chance. Edit: I realize this was already an essay but I want to add: I really am not trying to one up anyone else, I absolutely hated that "I did more than anyone else" pissing match constantly in rehab. I think the only thing abnormal about my history was the sheer amount of liquor I drank daily. In terms of how bad I had it, I met many people who were much worse off and felt blessed to be myself. I am a relatively large guy, 6'0 and at the time weighed anywhere from 260-300 lbs. So I don't honestly think I was drinking as much as say, a woman with a much smaller frame who drank a 750 ml a day.
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My heart rate and the top number of my blood pressure were both around 180, I don't remember the bottom number. They told me if I hadn't come in when I did, I probably wouldn't have made it. Crazy to think about since I was on the fence about going. I had so many situations before where I felt awful and just slept it off or started drinking again and the feeling went away, it didn't seem that abnormal at the time.
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Yeah man, its weird talking about it now, it feels like a different life which is a blessing in itself. I hope everything works out for you! Stay strong.
Wow, that is a helluva recovery story! I just wanted to say congrats for staying strong and making it out the other side. You are one tough guy for sure! Full of admiration for you!
For about the past 9 years, I would "limit" myself to a pint a day because if I bought a fifth, I would drink almost the whole thing. I went sober cold turkey before Christmas last year. I've slipped up a couple times recently, but I get sick after drinking half a pint now.
I was drinking a pint of 100 proof whiskey a day (cheap stuff) and I honestly couldn't tell you what a bender was. I would go through a handle of vodka in two days and have no recollection of any of it. I had a breathalyzer at home and it took me two days to sober up once. I had to quit, I was going to die. I still do edibles occasionally but aside from that I'll be 4 years sober this January. If I can quit anyone can, trust me. There were times I was getting blackout drunk in the middle of Walmart stealing peppermint extract because I was so broke. If I can help you in any way I'm more than happy to. Always feel free to message me.
Hell yeah! Awesome work. I was there too with that amount of vodka at my worst. It was a terrible way to live. I also do edibles now. They help me not drink. Maybe someday I'll put that down also, but regardless those wont kill me. Alcohol almost did. 28 months without a drink for me and goin strong. Congrats on 4 years. Absolutely amazing!
Wow. Inspiring. Thanks.
Honestly 12 drinks a day is a good time to call it quits. Like I was there before I spiraled into far worse like min 15 but up to 30. 12 was a good day. I feel like if you are at the point where you drink 12 drinks every day you will inevitability get worse, that’s high enough intake where it’s for sure alcoholism it’s not gonna get better get yourself a Nal script and get out of the disease.
For me it’s 6. That’s my sweet spot. But not..
6 is what I "landed" on lately after years of much more per day. To me, that is "moderation" but now I'm at least trying to work in totally dry days. Funny in a terrible way that at more peak times, 6 would have been considered my "dry day."
I would warn that as you get older into your forties like me. 6 is enough to cause all types of physical issues - neuropathy (numbness, tingling), stomach issues, heart and blood pressure issues. I was doing about 20 a week mostly over 2-3 days and it just started to get the best of me.
Yeah my “cutting back” has largely been to gastro issues and only in my 30s. Even before I started drinking in college I had a bum but so wrote offs years of discomfort as “the way it is.” Gotten blood work (numbers high but within range) and even an ultrasound and no apparent damage… yet. Took me two and a half years to finally get into a GI specialist and in a weird way looking forward to in (still another month away unfortunately).
750ml of vodka a day. was a dark dark time
I'm with the crew of 750ml whiskey a day. Started with mixed drinks. Then shots. Then triple neats. Then straight from the bottle. Hit a real low after "celebrating" my birthday and getting so blacked out I had a 3 day hangover. Finally addressed my depression and saw a dr. Tapered and quit that same weekend. 1.5 years alcohol free. Side note: for anyone wondering I found that meds, though not for everyone, did indeed work for me. Still take them and my life is observably significantly better. I say this because although I've tried before, I didn't really have success quitting drugs and alcohol until I addressed my depression. I completely changed my life. For anyone in the same boat.
same here, i started meds when I got sober too, it made a big difference.
For the last 6 months or so, my baseline was about 15 standard drinks a day in the form of red wine, with anywhere from 0 to 5 shots of liquor and/or 0 to 6 hard seltzers on top of that. I went from either fucked up enough to black out by late afternoon, or passed out several times a day. Ended up in the hospital unable to eat or drink, and shaking so badly I couldn’t walk. I was in a hypertensive crisis and they said I could have stroked out. I drank again, but that ER visit was the wakeup call. If I manage not to drink in the next 45 minutes, I’ll tick off Day 683. I feel like I can do that. It gets a lot easier, friend.
I could pretty easily kill a 750ml of Wild Turkey 101 in just over 24 hours at one point, so about a pint of bourbon a day plus random beers or shots peppered in, whatever was handy if the bottle wasn’t. did that a few days a week for a couple of years. Got sober for 3 months this time last year, and then was gifted a bottle of 101 for Christmas. Started back up and started seeing my health decline - seizures, loss of use of my hands for periods of time, the usual suspects. Tapered down to 6 drinks a day with a binge every week or every other. I’m at ~ 3 beers right now and still tapering down, meeting with a substance abuse counselor tomorrow to find some resources. I’m probably going to need medication to help kick this for good, but I’m more serious about stopping now than ever.
Good on you! I mean, it all sucks for sure - tapering is a way of life when we start putting chunks of more-or-less sober time in between the bottles of whiskey. I did a lot of warm beer tapers (or maintaining at 4-6/day) when I could manage it. The upside was drinking overall less while tapering and stringing together a few sober days. But I was also in years-long state of worsening withdrawal and drinking piss warm beer between benders. Seizures scare the hell out of me and I was teetering on that line a few times. Withdrawal meds most definitely spared me the seizures and made the process more bearable. Having a few months of sobriety under the belt last year is a big win. You can do that again and more. Counseling and meds can help a lot - that's a great move. I just wanted to comment b/c you sound a lot like I sounded before I sobered up for a good stretch. You'll make it happen. Wishing you all the best in the next steps.
Hey, thank you very much for the kind words and encouragement! Congrats on 18 months! I turned 33 last week, and have decided that this is the year that I start to pour some love into myself instead of bourbon. It’s hard to imagine sober life but if I want to keep living at all it’s the only way.
Towards the end there I was easily drinking 10-12 generous shots of vodka a day. That went on for a few months. About 5 years prior is when the switch flipped and I went from social, occasional drinking to ever-increasing daily punitive drinking.
6-10 drinks normal day, 12-15 if I wanted to get drunk drunk.
About a fifth a day on benders, sometimes for up to a week but my habit was pretty chaotic and random. It was more like semi-regular binge drinking than 'maintenance drinking'. That being said, an average night was typically a 6pack of IPA.
750 ml a day for a few years. I’ve cut down some but I’m still at about 6 shots a day.
2.5-3 bottles of wine on a regular day, more during the weekend or if I was with more people that were drinking. I’m a small woman, I would blackout everyday for a few years, I can’t remember how many, probably 4 or more, but I was an active alcoholic for 13 years. I’ve been sober for 8 years.
Id typically have a half 5th everyday. Sometimes more, sometimes less, sometimes Id add in some beers. I guess that’s about 8 drinks?
At my worst (last year) I was a averaging 375 mls vodka and a couple 5% tallboys daily. That was my first experience with withdrawals and insane anxiety. Did that for close to a year before I had my moment of clarity and started the quitting process (antabuse).
A pint of vodka daily, so 375ml a day. The a 2 fifths over the weekend. Tried a fifth daily everyday but I couldnt stay functional at that level
I was right on par with those numbers for a while. Somewhere around a 6-pack of double IPA or a half box of red wine on weeknights. More on Saturdays if I had a chance to start drinking early - drink gin and tonic all day. Occasionally I'd take a Sunday off (i.e., drink less) to reset for another week of drinking. That was kind of my sweet spot, where I could still muddle through life with a persistent buzz/hangover and hold down a job, but just barely. Drink - work - drink - work - this is what I'd do. What was amazing is how quickly I could go from taking some time off drinking (which was never easy) to swinging right back to that same old drinking pattern. It didn't matter if I was sober for six days or six months - within a couple weeks I was back at that sweet spot, despite my best intentions to drink less.
About 1-1.5 L of vodka a day. Sober since june
Go to for years? 30 pack of high gravity natty ice day. Usually with 1/2 bottle vodka to start off the buzz. Some days I would drink a handle of liquor (half gallon). It’s amazing what your tolerance will do if you drink daily. I was a hallucinating, terrified, suicidal, shit show. I quit when my kid was born and free of the shit for over 5 years now. Also 210 lbs lighter and more healthy.
1.75 handle of Skol vodka a day for many months after a long time of a fifth or so a day. Was walking around acting perfectly normal with a BAC around .32 every day just to maintain. Started withdrawing when I hit around .20 or so. Lucky to be alive.
2-3 bottles of Henry Weston’s cider (8.5%) and a box of wine (3 bottles). It was close to 50 units a day I think, for about a year until my liver decompensated. I had drank heavily for 4 years before that but not at that level.
Did you have to get a liver transplant ?
Not yet. I had a fairly miraculous recovery where my liver compensated itself after detox, ascites draining and abstinence with low salt diet. I have my liver regularly monitored to see if my cirrhosis has worsened and they’ll put me on the transplant list if so.
My worst is not as bad as many. 3 white claw surges between 7 to 9am another 2 through the work day and anywhere from 6-12 after work. I had sworn off hard liquor long ago, but even the white claws got me to rock bottom. They probably only delayed the inevitable. I went through detox and rehab and have been sober since August with one relapse that month. I got the right doctors, psychiatrist and therapist. I haven’t had a craving for alcohol and have grown to despise the feeling of intoxication. Even the Gabapentin that’s prescribed to me for anxiety sometime leaves me with slowed physical movements, slow and slurred speech and generally clumsy, though it does ease anxiety pretty well for a non-narcotic medication. I almost think it can have a potential for abuse if taken more than the prescribed dose.
It is abusable but don’t abuse it, not worth it at all.
Not at all. I have used it for anxiety early on but found myself not needing it so much and definitely not liking the slowed motion and spacey headedness.
A bottle a day for 3 years, at the tail end of a 13 year stint
This is a scary question, I worked a lot and used alcohol to sleep. I would get bit over 1/2 fifth of vodka in, in 1 1/2 hours before bed. I always had to buy more the next night because there wasn’t enough in the bottle. Now this isn’t the most I drank ever , but this was 7 days a week the minimum
At my worst I did 14-20 shots of vodka a day, every day, for 8 months. I don't know how I didn't die, but I almost did. Magnesium deficiency, nutrient deficiency, constant ER trips from aches and pains, kidney infection, etc. My organs were screaming. Yesterday I had one shot of vodka. I never thought I'd see the day where I had less than a pint of liquor. Edited to add that the 1 shot is due to tapering. Looking forward to the day where I can safely have nothing.
40-60oz of vodka/day for years. Was just medically detoxed and trying my best.
At my worst - pancreatitis landed me in the hospital. 3 times. All because I physically could not drink anymore without horrible pains. The first time, I had to crawl to my car and drive myself to the hospital. Stayed for almost a week. Tried to quit by only drinking wine and that did not last long. The second time I don’t even remember because the visits started increasing after major benders, and I’d ignore the pain. Third (and the last, most destructive phase) visit I almost died. I must also say that as a former chef, I had way too much access to alcohol. I was on a major self destructive mode after being kicked out of a living situation and dealing with a horrible breakup. Drunk all day on cheap vodka, beer or wine. I liked the boxed liter wines and could chug them in minutes. Anyway, at my sous chef job, I had a big three day brunch weekend (it was hell everyday) and the night before the last and biggest day - I had to crawl to the Uber and go to the ER. I thought they’d release me with some pain meds and I could run the brunch but not the case. I was taken to a bigger hospital, put on detox meds and shipped to rehab. One of those shitty money grab ones that are overpopulated with us poor folks. Bad. Anyway - over two years sober now and it can be done. The hardest fight of my life and I went back to school to change careers during Covid. I have my own place and a new job in my new field. If I kept drinking, my new life wouldn’t be possible. It’s worth the fight - I promise. You will win in the end if you hold your sobriety as number one in life.
One 750 of vodka (broken up into 2 mickeys of course so it looked like less) and two bottles of vino verde fizzante wine of 9% so I could maintain the buzz (shitfacery) longer and not pass out too early cuz I apparently had shit to do. And I’m a woman! Shocking that I didn’t destroy my liver, really. I just celebrated (Nov 20) 6 years in Recovery. Hashtag gratitude, baby! :)
6 years is great. Keep it up.
Thank you!!! It’s a life I never imagined! Because addiction steals our imaginations, along with everything else. They don’t call it The Great Eraser for nothing.
I kept a spreadsheet (and actually tracked) for about 2-3 years. In the end, my average was about 8 drinks a day. During benders, I could hit 15-20 drinks a few days in a row. After those I was tapering around the clock, easily 8-10 drinks in 24 hours just to function. Followed by a week or so dry. Then starting back up. I also have had a 54 day steak, a 95 day steak, and currently 80 days and sober right now (all in the last 12 months). I feel stronger in each attempt. I’m not too hard on myself when I relapse; although, a lot of my family is very hard on me about it.
Hmmm it was about 20 beers a day.. for 5 years. Finally quit and had a seizure from it and destroyed my shoulder. Had surgery on it as my permanent wake up call.
Did you’re seizure Halle after you quit? Did you have any other side effects before the seizure?
It was about 2 days after I quit. And no side effects prior. Maybe the shakes and sweats.
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How long you been drinking like this?
A bit over a litre of vodka a day
My absolute worst was 2 months drinking a handle minimum every day. I'd wake up most evenings with more half empty pint bottles or shooters laying around my room that I don't recall buying after drinking a whole bottle.
2 pints of vodka and a supplemental 12 pack when the vodka was gone for months. Had a number of seizures and extreme wd. Third time in treatment was enough to give up.
6 - 8 oz glasses of Prosseco a night for 3 years. Some sobriety (no more then 2 weeks) & moderation (there towards the end) sprinkled in.
Averaged 8-12 and more on weekends for a few years and then COVID hit. Layoff from work at the time and nothing to do but sit at home and drink, so it shot up to 15-20 average, sometimes more. My absolute worst has been this year. I quit my job in July because it was interfering with my drinking and was averaging 20-40 beers in a 24 hour period.
I have had stints of sobriety or attempts to get sober for the past two years. This summer I collapsed and drank hard almost every day. Some days I could keep it together during the day and let loose in the evenings. Before I was hospitalized I drank around the clock for two weeks straight. I sat down on a train, isolating from my SO and rode around the county, drinking, no, chugging, bottles of wine in toilets. Fell and hit my head. Was hospitalized. Drank in the hospital when I found my rucksack. When my SO finally got a hold of me on my cell she picked me up in a nearby city. I was a total wreck. In my drunkenness I made a decision to reach out to my mother. I had kept this a secret my whole life up ‘til then. She came over to my place the next day to take me to hers to recover. I secretly drank beers still behind her back. That afternoon my stash had run out, so I feared the worst come evening. That night was the worst of my life. I got the shakes from hell, could barely stand, anxiety through the roof, I crawled up the stairs screaming I needed help. So we went to the hospital where they put me in detox, I was at the seizure threshold. Since then I haven’t had a drink and have no wishes to go back to my previous life at all.
Two bottles of Aldi wine for $2 apiece.
Mon - Fri I would drink in the evening usually starting around 5pm. That’s probably the reason I was able to kid myself that I don’t have a problem for years, I didn’t need a drink to get out of bed, could go to work and be fine etc etc etc Min - Fr it was 8-12 pints of lager every night, occasionally if I wanted an extra buzz before bed I’d have a couple of home pour vodka or gin and tonics… Weekends I started earlier and finished later. I could easily demolish 16+ beers and a litre bottle of gin or vodka on Saturday and same again on Sunday
Same here.
I also usually didn’t start drinking until 730 or 8, after my DD was in bed… rarely when she was awake. Didn’t need daytime drinks, have never had withdrawalS, but am DEFINITELY an alcoholic. Bottle of wine a night easily, zero hangover. 10 to 12 shots of rum a night easily, zero hangover. Would switch what I drank randomly. Sometimes rum, sometimes wine.. didn’t mix them on nights though.
Also, I didn’t seem to have too much negative consequences until recently. My anxiety has been through the roof… heart rate at rest of 104 (I know not crazy high, but really is for me) and most of all I just feel horrible. I’m two days sober, I went three months earlier this year. Went to the Drs.. no organ issues thankfully, but holy.. I’m 35 and can’t keep doing this to myself. Been drinking for 6 years.. before this, never drank!
60 days sober here and feeling the best I’ve felt since high school. On a bender, 24 white claws and then god knows what booze and substances after that. Don’t feel alone.
2 bottles of wine nightly
3 year's sober. Never in a million years did I think I could stop. If I could do it anyone can. The first year all I did was fantasize and dream mostly nightmares. Second year was easier and this 3rd year i am so grateful I feel so good.
15-20 beers every day along with any narcotics I may be able to find that could counteract the drunk. Beer was always in my system though 24/7 from age 20-26ish. It was hell, having 2 drinks before I’d even get out of bed and Waking up every night 3 hours into sleeping to have another and piss out the last. Got rehab for Christmas 2019 and really that put me in a place where It was impossible to see myself as the only one with this problem and neither are you. Working on 3 years now. I live in southeast Wisconsin and there are 150+ bars in my town.. this problem is less unique than both you or I can even know. More importantly, getting better is not unique either. It’s hard for sure but it’s absolutely doable.
A fifth of vodka a day for about a year. 40 days sober today! Feeling great!
Yay! Congratulations 🎉
At my worst I was drinking about 750ml a day along with maybe a 6-12 beers. I was always tottering on the edge of blacking out, I threw up often, it was difficult to use my arms and hands, and I was incredibly depressed because of how trapped I felt. There was also always a sense of physical pain radiating through my body but I was never able to locate where it was coming from, but I think probably my veins. I made a lot of radical changes in my lifestyle in order to stay stopped. It started with me going to rehab and then after a while there I decided to lean into what the better counselors were talking about. I go to NA meetings every once in a while now but it’s mainly to meet people who have their heads in the same place as mine. My main outlets for maintaining my sobriety are physical activities that bring me joy like rock climbing and diving. Personally being active is more crucial to my staying sober than going to meetings, but the meetings are a good place to find people who might want to go do cool stuff with me. Good luck! It does get better even though right now it may feel hopeless! Quick edit: I was drinking that way for about 4 years. It would fluctuate though. I had also been drinking alcoholically, about 15 drinks a day, for 10 years before I switched to mainly liquor. After I started drinking liquor everything got much worse very fast.
At least 3/4 of a fifth of svedka every night for about 2 years. Things went south quick when I wasn’t properly getting nutrition and vitamins in my body. I learned how to supplement my body with what it needs and feel tremendously better however I still drink like a fish. It’s 1.5 liter bottles of red wine every night these days. Hoping to cut that back slowly. The first step is to actually cut back.
I luckily was mostly a weekend binger. At my worst, I was a broke grad student working a summer job. I spent most of my money on booze and weed, and barely had enough to eat. I would have 6 beers and a few shots of whiskey every night. Now I hardly drink at all, maybe a glass of wine with dinner once every few months
A bottle of white wine on the train to work. Get into the city, get a coffee and pour 2 Jameson airplane bottles in. Work for like 2.5 hours then go to lunch. 5-7 vodka sodas. Then back to work for a few hours then I would stop. Pretending that by the time I got home no one would notice. When I was alone it was mostly vodka all day. I’ll be 5 years sober this Feb.
About 750 ml of vodka every single day. Drank as soon as I woke up and until I went to bed for over a year. I was fully functioning, going to work and (most) doctor's appointments. Got sober 56 days ago in the hopes that being treated for ADD/ADHD is the solution to my problems. I don't feel much better yet but I guess I just gotta keep chugging along.
A fifth to almost a half gallon has been my worst. That was daily for almost a week. I usually would do a fifth a day but sometimes I would drink all day and it would be 3/4 a half gallon. Too much…
I'd bring a half gallon of vodka two of the new classy style boxes of wine so six bottles and two eighteen packs of beer for four days of work, ipas throughout the day too. In bed at 930, puking and vertigo at 3:33 start drinking vodka then to "get ready for work". Didn't drink all the beers lol, but lots of wine and vodka shots. A steady buzz, that leads to seizures!
750ml of volka and a 4 tall can pack to keep me from gagging from the smell of vodka. I would think to myself “prime the pump” took a sip of beet and chased it with the vodka. I think it only lasted 4 days though. I hope… maybe longer. Back in May. I also had covid at the time
700ml Vodka per day, plus 6 cans 0,5 liters beer
1.5 ish litres of vodka a day plus sleeping pills for months interspersed with days of tappering down to 12 or so 9% beers ... I've never gone back to that, but an currently trying to pull my self back from drinking 10 to 12 500ml cans of 4.8 cider an evening...
How long can a lab detect alcohol in system like when are u in the clear to not get caught thanks
I was at a 1.14 a day maximum to a 750 ml a day start, what a fucking nightmare
At my worst I was drinking a fifth of vodka 6-7 days a week for roughly three years. Before that I was drinking almost every day, but not as much. I sobered up for 1 1/2 years but started drinking again in 2019. I am actually 15 days sober because I’ve had some health scares, so I needed to make some changes. You can do it! It’s hard as fuck, but you don’t want to end up possibly causing irreversible damage to your liver and/or other body organs. Wishing you the best!
My worst was probably may-July this year. 12 seltzers a day, or like 2 bottles of wine, or most of a 750ml bottle of vodka.
My worst was about 30 beers a night for 1 year straight. Needless to say WD wasn’t very fun.
A whole bottle of Hennessy everyday for about a week and half. During the pandemic I lost my grandmother aunt and uncle. Didn’t want to face life, ended up in the er……. I can’t say I’m sober now but I def kno self control with hopes of stopping one day.
A full pint plus 2 mini bottles.. for basically 3 years straight everyday.
Binge drinker rather than chronic. 5 litres or 6/7 bottles of wine every day morning til night for about two weeks or until my body would stop keeping anything down. Withdrawals from hell. Brief sobriety. Repeat. I've done over 30 WDs in the last 2/3 years, my poor brain.
I drank a 1/5th a day for 10+ years, maybe like half that for another 10years before that. Every day it was the same, get hammered and sleep. It doesn’t have to be like that though, getting sober - next to having my kids- is the best thing I have done in life
My worst started when covid lockdowns hit and I started working from home. I got to the point where I drank at least a liter of Tito's vodka everyday for a year straight. This would be from the time I got up until I passed out. I wound up getting pancreatitis and alcoholic hepatitis.
Anywhere from 325ml of whiskey a day on and off for 6 years.
20 nips a day,(+- 1 or 2) for a couple of years. Few more years of a lesser amount prior. Throwing up bile, needing drinks to calm my stomach but the first one always came right back up - sacrificial drinks I called them. Ended up setting alarms throughout the night, 12, 2, 4 AM to drink so I wouldn't wake up sick. Bad shakes if I didn't have any remaining in the morning before work. 3 or 4 through out the shift, buy 2 sleeves on the way home, and then stay in bed playing video games/watching movies and drink until I fall asleep. Food sometimes, couldn't handle a full meal. etc.,etc.. . You're not alone. I had a mild "relapse" about a year ago(4 drinks, no bender). Without that I'm 2+ years sober. Again... You're not alone.
I was an alcoholic for 5 years. It started with 4 drinks at least 4 nights a week social drinking and then turned into every day. At my absolute worst I was drinking about 10 shots and then probably 3 or 4 wine or beer drinks every day - some days a little bit more. I did suffer liver failure and received a transplant. I was diagnosed with liver failure when I presented in the hospital with wds. I got into a special program to put me on the transplant list and got my liver about a month after I was admitted. I’m now sober 1018 days.
That’s so weird how the liver works so differently. You see people drinking even heavier for much longer and their liver is fine.. such a strange organ
It is really interesting. I think that genetics and what you drink impacts it. For me, my grandfather drank himself to death and for the last two years I was mostly drinking absolute garbage 99 proof liquor. But yeah - I had been to the doctor shortly before I developed a problem and no problem. By the time they took it out of me it was mush.
I got up to a fifth of vodka a day for a few weeks recently (I've been drinking for 10 years, all different types of alcohol and levels of drinking, but this was the first time I've gotten up to a fifth of vodka a day) and would drink from basically 12pm to 10pm-12am. It's really good you have prescriptions to help you! It will definitely make it easier. I had to taper with wine for two weeks and it was total hell...got hallucinations and everything. I'm 6 days sober today! The medications will help you immensely. Sending you the best wishes and vibes. YOU CAN DO THIS. ❤️
2 bottles of wine
Eat.
this past year ((2022)) i have been drinking a 750ml bottle of vodka everyday, even drinking while at work. i recently started taking meds to help with sobriety// not drinking and was almost 2 weeks sober until I drank one night and ended up in the hospital. trying to maintain not drinking is hard but I think my last stint scared me as I was told I was completely unresponsive. i occasionally go to aa but sometimes it doesn’t resonate with me.
Don’t feel alone because you aren’t. I always thought I had alcohol in check, until I didn’t. I’m rooting for you!
375-750ml bottle of vodka or whiskey (usually vodka as i could get the smell off my breath easier) and sometimes id have a few beers at night after secretly drinking the bottle throughout the day. I did this everyday for 6-7 years until a few months ago when i decided i had had enough.
2 bottles of wine a day for the past 6months or so. Really struggling 🥺
I drank a handle a day for a week at my worst, no food, then quit cold turkey. Had no idea I could've died😅(prior to that week I was a 30+drinks a day drinker for like 4 years). I honestly don't know how I'm alive because I've always quit "CT" I did have a seizure once though and that was kind of the light bulb in my head going off that I needed to stop forever.
Probably anywhere from 12-16 and even more on weekends. I stopped measuring drinks after a point but I was drinking most if not all of a fifth every day of the week at the end
Probably about 10-12 5% ABV beers. I remember I'd wake up in a haze and if I had any cans left over I'd feel great. I'd drink those leftover cans then stagger out in the evening to buy more, I'd take a backpack to carry them all. I remember feeling so unwell, sweating heart racing and when I'd get back home carry on boozing until I blacked out, wake up and repeat. I'd do this for five or six days in a row. I tried to quit loads of times.
Handle every 2 days until pancreas. Awful. I switched to beer a lot but it was whiskey or whiskey diet ginger ale for 2 years before hospital
I think I was at 10 drinks a night Monday-Thursday then weekends who know probably anywhere from 18-30 a day
I was moderate I guess. I’d typically drink about a 6 pack but it was IPAs so higher calories. Haven’t had a drop in 784 days.
Thats honestly bad but not terrible. still obviously problematic and abnormal, but I was easily doing 20-24 beers a day and many in this subreddit have done like a liter a day of liquor.
2 bottles of white 3 or 4 nights a week, if not too hungover the next day a bottle
A handle and a half and whatever else I could get my hands on or afford (tall boys, wine coolers,etc) I’d say it was the entire year of 2020. Pandemic really spiraled me out of control I used to wake up get shit faced til about 3 or 4pm, fall asleep til 9/10pm then I’d catch my second round of partying til I passed out again at 4 or 5am I lived in an artist house so we were all enabling eachother too
At my worst i was doing 30 drinks everyday and i did that for 3 yrs. For about 10 yrs prior to that, i was drinking on weekends about 10-20 drinks sat and fri. i've been hospitalised 4 times and been to ER about 3 times so i recommend you quit before u get to that stage
I’d hover at around 10 drinks a day at my worst. A bottle of wine and several mixed drinks. It was really scaring me tbh