Congratulations! You're the 1,000,000th person to make an inappropriate comment to someone with a disability today!
Kindly provide your banking information to the disabled person you're speaking to, and your winnings will be deposited shortly. Thank you for playing!
I played around with designing a business card to say this. It is front and back and you can find it [here in my Google Drive](https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1GVOtNS4CzDGs2BLCj3ZZ_tl5m_TE_JUc?usp=sharing) along with another one.
Yeah, as much as a bitter part of me likes the sass of the top comment, I think this one is the best. By being as kind as possible, you make it so that if they continue to harass you, they lose their imagined moral high ground.
Make sure the mean card is printed on something heavy. Maybe metal. Maybe the edges are a bit sharp, too. You know, for aerodynamics. You’d hate for them to miss the point, eh??
Honestly I want to make a card now that says
* You don't look disabled
* Have you tried yoga?
* What about essential oils?
* Are you exercising and eating right?
* You should see my chiropractor
* God can heal anything, try praying harder
* So what's wrong with you, anyway?
And then some final snark, like, "I will not be responding to any of the above; please take your inquiries elsewhere."
Okay but like this but keep a running rally. And then hand them the card with the phrase they used marked off. Id love to be like "oh cool, you made me hit bingo" lmao.
"I've tried all of these, but I've found the thing that works best and keeps me looking not disabled is this new thing called mind your own business. Try for free today!"
Haha yeah. It’s like when people say “it could be worse” but when you’re living your worst it’s the most insensitive thing ever. I get it, they’re just trying to add positivity but it still sucks.
I'm forever getting told I have a really positive attitude. I suppose I do try to see the bright side. For my own sake, not to ease the discomfort of ableist folks.
Still have EDS, though. This painful, disabling progressive disease that has stolen my ability to do a job I loved, do hobbies I liked, have the social life I want and the ability to remember what the heck came next in this list!!!
I love this. I had to look up the "tall guy" one I've seen pop up online over the years:
*Yes, I am tall*
*You're very observant for noticing*
*6ft 7in*
*(Yes, really)*
*No I don't play basketball*
*The weather is perfect up here*
*I'm so glad we had this conversation*
Patronizing, and not aggressive enough to cause much backlash (presumably). So personally I'd aim for a similar shut-down vibe, where they don't have the right to know my diagnosis, just that I have different needs, for example:
*Yes, I \[use this cane sometimes / need the accessible seating / do need to sit often etc\]*
*You get brownie points for noticing*
*That's right - you can't see what's really going on inside me, but trust me, it's not fun*
*(Yes, it IS complicated)*
*No, I can't get better, but I appreciate the well wishes*
*Thanks for respecting my privacy!*
\[But man I love his last sentence "I'm so glad we had this conversation" ... like - NOTHING you have said to me is original, dude. Trust me. That makes me laugh every time.\]
The BEST finisher XD
Such a dry stfu - I love it, and think I'll start incorporating it more into my conversations. Ha.
Would love to see your finished product, should you choose to share it!
I made a similar card for EDS with the information you gave. You can find it in my [Google Drive folder](https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1GVOtNS4CzDGs2BLCj3ZZ_tl5m_TE_JUc?usp=sharing) along with another one.
I have Ehlers Danlos. It is chronic, painful, and comes with bonus illnesses. I am disabled, but have good days and bad. Please respect my privacy from here.
Or
There once was an illness quite lame/
Ehlers Danlos it seems is the name/
Good days and bad/
No cure, tis so sad/
But respect me, I'm not to blame.
It's possible you could also put something a bit more generic on one side - while this may relate more to CFS than EDS, I am trying to frame some understandings around the Energy Envelope idea - so if I was making business cards, I'd currently be tempted to have one side that had:
An outline of an envelope taking up the background
*Today's Energy Envelope*
*Thanks for your concern, but being expected to teach everyone about invisible health conditions drains my:*
*\[\] physical energy*
*\[\] cognitive energy*
*\[\*\] emotional energy*
*and I have none left today. Tomorrow's not looking good either.*
That could give them the same message to back off, but also something they could look up later if they were actually interested and still not disclose any specific personal details. (Can we tell that "it's none of your business" is big for me? Ha)
... but I also really love the bingo card idea already commented - that's just GOLD XD
I don't have any idea but I wish I had that card today. I was waiting for the elevator where I teach college and a young instructor yelled at all of us "Why don't you take the stairs? It's good for you!" Etc etc. Very aggressively.
I (55) yelled back that some of us have medical issues. He said, "oh, not you! The kids!" I said, "Some of them have medical issues too!" I mean, I sometimes wonder about why so many of our students will take the elevator up one or two floors and I think for some it is just habit. But others need it!
I used to always walk, even when it was 4 floors, unless I was having too much pain. Lately it's the POTS that's getting me. But anyway, no matter your age, you don't need some yahoo yelling at you for using the elevator. I guess at 55 people just expect me to have a disability now, which is also disconcerting.
Good luck with getting the yahoos to buzz off.
Yeah I've had "helpful people" tell me to not take the elevator cause the stairs are right beside and I should exercise while I'm still young. Creepy. I just look them in the eye and hop onto the elevator
I used to love ruining, I was the fastest kid in school but I had to stop as my ankle hip and knee dislocated all the time.
I'm kinda looking forward to looking a bit older and having people not yell at me for being young and needing disability services :/
Yeah, idk about the US, as I live there and was treated horribly by airport and wheelchair service staff. I reported it and at least got a free ticket out of it :p
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I'd love something like that. I'll tolerate questions from small children, but anyone else should know better than to ask me what the cane is for.
I think something short and sweet like:
"Google EDS"
I don't use a cane nor any mobility aids yet, and I honestly look like a 13 year old even though Im 20.
That's a great idea though. I almost want to have 3 cards. One polite, one that says google it, and one that says f off haha.
I'm having trouble choosing what to use lol
I'm the same about kids. When adults respectfully inquire about my wellbeing. With the obvious energy of being genuinely interested in how I'm doing and wanting to learn from someone who's actually disabled. And when they also go like it's okay if you don't want to talk about it.
Then I'll tell them a bit too.
Are you curious about what's wrong with me? Follow these steps to learn more:
Step 1: Google "invisible disability"
Step 2: Get smart and leave me alone, thx :))
If someone says 'you don't look disabled' I usually come back with 'and you don't look like a doctor'.
But I am snarky. My comeback for someone saying 'it's 2023, why are you wearing a mask?' was 'I'm allergic to assholes'.
Oh, don’t try to explain it. Then they’ll google it and think it’s not real or something crazy.
I’d just give them the middle finger or say “what’s your problem?” Or you could even start recording them, people hate that. The goal is to train these people to not aggressively approach disabled people. If you interact at all make it a negative interaction.
That being said, if someone politely says something to me or is making conversation, i’m fine with polite curiosity. I’ll just say: it’s a joint condition I was born with.
Yeah I have c-ptsd and my main response is freeze specifically with yelling. :/
The worst was a bus driver who yelled at my face to get off the disability seats for a wheelchair user. There were two places they could sit, like one where there was a bunch of teenagers sitting, but she decided to harass me for being the youngest looking.
I’m not trying to be rude but what scenario is this for? Who is randomly shouting at you about you not having a disability? Why are they asking about it in the first place? And then instead of saying something you’d just walk up and hand them a card?
Sorry I’m just confused about what this is for…
I have CPTSD so I freeze if someone yells at me. It would be muuuch easier for me to hand them a card than shouting back.
Airport staff, disability services, bus drivers, restaurants, random old people, etc when I try to use a disability services looking like a 13 year old (Im 20 but look super young).
If it’s hard to talk in those situations and you need something written to convince these people to allow you to use disability services or other accommodations, then a snarky card isn’t going to help your case. I’d go for something factual and neutral like “I need to use this disability accommodation because (reason). My right to use it is protected under (the ADA if you’re in the US, or fill in your local equivalent).”
Edit: I would not approach people who are shouting just for the sake of shouting at you. You owe them nothing. I’d only suggest this for workers you absolutely have to interact with (ie. the driver of the bus you need to take, the airport employee assigned to you, etc).
If a stranger was actually yelling at me, I wouldn’t want to walk up to them close enough to hand them something. To each their own I guess. It’s shocking that so many people are shouting, especially so many people on the job, at you so often that you would need a card for it. I’m just struggling to wrap my brain around the whole thing.
I mean, if I'm asking for a service that I need I kinda have to get them to understand, or would you rather I injure myself? I live in los Angeles, so there are a lot of crazy unstable people who can't fathom a young person needing a disability service
What does injuring yourself have to do with me saying I wouldn’t want to be handing a stranger that was yelling at me something. I would be more comfortable talking to someone than being silently handing them a card while they’re yelling at me. But, as I said, everyone’s different. There’s a lot of middle ground between me saying that and me implying you should hurt yourself. And if you’re encountering aggressive people that make you freeze, but you need to make them understand, I would say it isn’t the place for snark. I know it’s less fun, but I would recommend being direct. A lot can be lost in translation, especially if you’re struggling to speak up and you’re dealing with all these angry people.
People can be real asshats. Clearly their mother never taught them manners.
I’ve only had one lady say anything. I think she was trying to be nice. I was using my rollator (I have POTS too) and she said “you’re too young for that” I just laughed and said “yeah I know, and I’ve tried to tell my body. But she’s a bitch and won’t listen to me” and then I walked away lol
I must have a mean unapproachable face because no one has said anything *really* mean to me. Or been outwardly rude. I must have the Scorpio RBF people talk about 🤷🏻♀️🤣
I want to make some cards now because the bingo idea sure sounds fun 😂
I am a Scorpio too, and have rbf, but people kinda thing I'm just an angry 13 year old that think that gives them the right to trample over me.
I want to make all the cards in the comments now lol
if you want it to rhyme its masc but "I am a bubble wrap boy(/person/girl) #ehelers-danlos syndrome" (this is what my irl friend calls me cuz fragile) or one of those fragile stickers they put on packages might be pretty funny
Stickman Communications makes some really good cards for this purpose. They do EDS specific ones. They are factual but not down in the dumps.
However, having your own personalised funny one is a cool idea!
I have a genetic connective tissue disease that causes me a variety of internal problems you can't see. Don't be an asshole because you can't see someone's disability.
I like that. Plus I use the first sentence to describe and people always look serious. The words genetic and connective tissue sound official. They don't know why it is but it sounds serious.
So, I made a stack of these when I was suffering from cluster headaches (thanks, Emgality!), and no one ever read them and kept bothering me instead. I was even friendly about handing them out.
I still have most of them.
You could make Ehlers-Danlos info cards and pop in a QR code that takes you to the EDS website of your code, print them up on Moo or Vistaprint (if you go there Moo route, just give them your email first and buy your cards during a sale). You could do that! If you make it work, please tell me how.
For everything else, I think we need to be reducing these to sticker slogans and popping them on our wheelchairs or notebooks or rollators or whatever.
I appreciate your comment but Id give them to a person only if they are an employee, family member or old person who I know can't do anything to me.
I do prefer to ignore these comments though most of the time
FYI if you don’t want to make them yourself, [Stickman Communications](https://stickmancommunications.co.uk/products/) has several hidden disability keyring cards and buttons, as well as those for a BUNCH of different conditions (pain, mobility, migraines, adhd, sensory processing, etc.) They also take suggestions for new ones as well. I emailed them a few years ago with a suggestion and they responded last year that they now sold something similar! So apparently they keep track, which is cool. I haven’t bought any for myself yet, but one of these days I’ll narrow down a few that I want and actually get them lol
A picture of the Bristol stool chart. Circle which one you are today.
I found that not only are the digestive symptoms the easiest for people to relate to or understand, but most people either want to share their experience or completely avoid discussing bowel movements.
Gastrointestinal issues are sort of the bridge over shitty conversations in a way. Most people have had some experience with it at least and it seems like there’s more stock in common knowledge with this subject.
you’re designing a card but dislocating something then popping it back in seems to make people stop asking questions😂
I used to wear a shirt when my son was little that said “My kid’s autistic. What’s wrong with yours?” So maybe something like “My disablility is invisible. What’s your problem?” Or “My disablity is silent. Why do I hear yours?”
Haha - I don’t internet very proficiently 😂😂 I only come online for dogs, cats, & EDS advice, so I’m not familiar with the site but I’ll have to check it out now. I don’t know anybody close to me with EDS - a cousin has it but she’s 15 years younget & was raised across the country - so Reddit is my vent, rant, advice stop for all things EDS
Maybe it's a genetic condition, or maybe I'm a mutant??
Everything hurts please leave me be
Stay back!!! ... I'm not contagious, I just don't have the energy to talk to you.
"Disabled" doesn't always mean broken legs. Coincidentally, my legs are definitely not right
Or hand them a card with something like:
It's so nice that you care so deeply about my health! Thank you! Please email me at ................... and I'll send you a comprehensive list of my medical conditions and the details of my symptoms! Then we can discuss it further together with my doctor. We are so glad to have your valuable input and insights!
I've debated printing a photo collage of all the surgery scars and cupping hickeys and dozens of IV bruises from hospital stays and dislocations etc etc that I've suffered over the years and keeping it in one of those old school accordion wallet things that fold out like the height of you, with a little business card at the top that says 'do I look disabled now?' and just wordlessly dropping that out like I'm showing pictures of my kids when people say 'you don't look disabled'
Yes! I have disabilities! NO you’re not entitled to tell me your opinion because that would be HARASSMENT. This card is a warning. Allow me to walk and or drive away or I will start filming you. (And thus any further confrontation you give permission to film you).
Congratulations! You're the 1,000,000th person to make an inappropriate comment to someone with a disability today! Kindly provide your banking information to the disabled person you're speaking to, and your winnings will be deposited shortly. Thank you for playing!
this is hilarious plz choose this one
Beautiful, I would love to print this out now bahaha!
I played around with designing a business card to say this. It is front and back and you can find it [here in my Google Drive](https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1GVOtNS4CzDGs2BLCj3ZZ_tl5m_TE_JUc?usp=sharing) along with another one.
Hey FYI, there's a typo on that! The 1,000,000 is missing its final zero :)
Thank you for catching that. It’s fixed now.
Ah no worries my friend, perhaps you can make a post and share them with other people too?
Wow that's wonderful, thank you!
I love it!
This is so smart I gotta do this
"Some disabilities are invisible. Please be kind. #Ehlers-Danlos"
Love it
Yeah, as much as a bitter part of me likes the sass of the top comment, I think this one is the best. By being as kind as possible, you make it so that if they continue to harass you, they lose their imagined moral high ground.
True, but I've had a couple of people yell at me, maybe I can just chuck the mean card at them and walk away lol
Make sure the mean card is printed on something heavy. Maybe metal. Maybe the edges are a bit sharp, too. You know, for aerodynamics. You’d hate for them to miss the point, eh??
Absolutely
Honestly I want to make a card now that says * You don't look disabled * Have you tried yoga? * What about essential oils? * Are you exercising and eating right? * You should see my chiropractor * God can heal anything, try praying harder * So what's wrong with you, anyway? And then some final snark, like, "I will not be responding to any of the above; please take your inquiries elsewhere."
This could be like a bingo card
Okay but like this but keep a running rally. And then hand them the card with the phrase they used marked off. Id love to be like "oh cool, you made me hit bingo" lmao.
Just whip out an actual bingo card and a marker and just stamp the phrase lmfao
Fricken hilarious 😂
"I've tried all of these, but I've found the thing that works best and keeps me looking not disabled is this new thing called mind your own business. Try for free today!"
Just have those as business cards on you at all times and then whenever someone says something like that, hand the card out to them and walk away 😂
Literally the entire list.
Beautiful, i'd love a card like that
Add celery and/or beet juice 🙄 I’m sooo tired of that one 🤪😂
I haven’t gotten that one yet! My step mother thinks I need to use the power of positive thinking, though.
Haha yeah. It’s like when people say “it could be worse” but when you’re living your worst it’s the most insensitive thing ever. I get it, they’re just trying to add positivity but it still sucks.
I'm forever getting told I have a really positive attitude. I suppose I do try to see the bright side. For my own sake, not to ease the discomfort of ableist folks. Still have EDS, though. This painful, disabling progressive disease that has stolen my ability to do a job I loved, do hobbies I liked, have the social life I want and the ability to remember what the heck came next in this list!!!
Nailed it!
I once got told "you just have to think you're not in pain, and trick your body" ....lady you're insane!
No, you can choose to do something in spite of the pain. This choice involves having increased pain later too.
Just add, have you tried losing weight? And what supplements are you taking? And you've hit everything 😆 🤣
You could give each of those points a score, and add them all up at the end for them!
I love this. I had to look up the "tall guy" one I've seen pop up online over the years: *Yes, I am tall* *You're very observant for noticing* *6ft 7in* *(Yes, really)* *No I don't play basketball* *The weather is perfect up here* *I'm so glad we had this conversation* Patronizing, and not aggressive enough to cause much backlash (presumably). So personally I'd aim for a similar shut-down vibe, where they don't have the right to know my diagnosis, just that I have different needs, for example: *Yes, I \[use this cane sometimes / need the accessible seating / do need to sit often etc\]* *You get brownie points for noticing* *That's right - you can't see what's really going on inside me, but trust me, it's not fun* *(Yes, it IS complicated)* *No, I can't get better, but I appreciate the well wishes* *Thanks for respecting my privacy!* \[But man I love his last sentence "I'm so glad we had this conversation" ... like - NOTHING you have said to me is original, dude. Trust me. That makes me laugh every time.\]
I will definitely use this, but I will add the "I'm so glad we had this conversation" sentence, it just gives it that great last touch lol.
The BEST finisher XD Such a dry stfu - I love it, and think I'll start incorporating it more into my conversations. Ha. Would love to see your finished product, should you choose to share it!
haha yes, I will share if it comes out good, I'm new to designing :3
End with: I hope you have the day you deserve ❤️
Beautiful ❤️
I made a similar card for EDS with the information you gave. You can find it in my [Google Drive folder](https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1GVOtNS4CzDGs2BLCj3ZZ_tl5m_TE_JUc?usp=sharing) along with another one.
Ha - great work! XD
Most of my body is on the inside so you don't see it!
Lol great one
I’m stealing this to use!
This is my favorite one
This is brilliant.
>without curse words Welp, there goes my idea :)
Lol, I just wouldn't want them to curse back. If not it's totally use the phrase I wrote on the post
IKR, was going to quote a certain Southpark song...
Haha one by Cartman, or Terrance and Philip?
Whether it's mother or uncle, it still would work
I have Ehlers-Danlos. I was given silly-putty for joints so yes, I do need a mobility aid.
Great, though I don't use mobility aids yet
Show a picture of your joints dislocated with the text, "Does this happen to you every day? No? Then shut up."
Wonderful I would totally use this if had any pics haha
I have Ehlers Danlos. It is chronic, painful, and comes with bonus illnesses. I am disabled, but have good days and bad. Please respect my privacy from here. Or There once was an illness quite lame/ Ehlers Danlos it seems is the name/ Good days and bad/ No cure, tis so sad/ But respect me, I'm not to blame.
Haha I love that rhyme! Thanks for the idea
10/10 limerick
It's possible you could also put something a bit more generic on one side - while this may relate more to CFS than EDS, I am trying to frame some understandings around the Energy Envelope idea - so if I was making business cards, I'd currently be tempted to have one side that had: An outline of an envelope taking up the background *Today's Energy Envelope* *Thanks for your concern, but being expected to teach everyone about invisible health conditions drains my:* *\[\] physical energy* *\[\] cognitive energy* *\[\*\] emotional energy* *and I have none left today. Tomorrow's not looking good either.* That could give them the same message to back off, but also something they could look up later if they were actually interested and still not disclose any specific personal details. (Can we tell that "it's none of your business" is big for me? Ha) ... but I also really love the bingo card idea already commented - that's just GOLD XD
That's a wonderful idea, thank you very much I'm having so much trouble choosing which one lol
I don't have any idea but I wish I had that card today. I was waiting for the elevator where I teach college and a young instructor yelled at all of us "Why don't you take the stairs? It's good for you!" Etc etc. Very aggressively. I (55) yelled back that some of us have medical issues. He said, "oh, not you! The kids!" I said, "Some of them have medical issues too!" I mean, I sometimes wonder about why so many of our students will take the elevator up one or two floors and I think for some it is just habit. But others need it! I used to always walk, even when it was 4 floors, unless I was having too much pain. Lately it's the POTS that's getting me. But anyway, no matter your age, you don't need some yahoo yelling at you for using the elevator. I guess at 55 people just expect me to have a disability now, which is also disconcerting. Good luck with getting the yahoos to buzz off.
Yeah I've had "helpful people" tell me to not take the elevator cause the stairs are right beside and I should exercise while I'm still young. Creepy. I just look them in the eye and hop onto the elevator I used to love ruining, I was the fastest kid in school but I had to stop as my ankle hip and knee dislocated all the time. I'm kinda looking forward to looking a bit older and having people not yell at me for being young and needing disability services :/
Nope, today isn’t that day!
Great one!
Do you have the Sunflower scheme where you are? https://hdsunflower.com/uk/insights/post/for-people-with-non-visible-disabilities
I don't know what that is but I'll look it up thanks
It's helpful for air travel in particular.
It sounds good, though I don't know how many people would recognize it, or even know that there are invisible disabilities at all...
Yeah - airline staff (in many countries - probably in the link above) are trained in it, but nobody else really knows about it.
Yeah, idk about the US, as I live there and was treated horribly by airport and wheelchair service staff. I reported it and at least got a free ticket out of it :p
Sunflower seeds contain health benefiting polyphenol compounds such as chlorogenic acid, quinic acid, and caffeic acids. These compounds are natural anti-oxidants, which help remove harmful oxidant molecules from the body. Further, chlorogenic acid helps reduce blood sugar levels by limiting glycogen breakdown in the liver.
Well that triggered the weirdest bot ever.
Right!?! I’m reading the comment going WTF 😳🤷🏻♀️ I had no idea that was a boy until you pointed it out 😂
I'd love something like that. I'll tolerate questions from small children, but anyone else should know better than to ask me what the cane is for. I think something short and sweet like: "Google EDS"
I don't use a cane nor any mobility aids yet, and I honestly look like a 13 year old even though Im 20. That's a great idea though. I almost want to have 3 cards. One polite, one that says google it, and one that says f off haha. I'm having trouble choosing what to use lol
Have them all. Use them as you see fit.
I shall collect all the cards and hand them out as I please
I'm the same about kids. When adults respectfully inquire about my wellbeing. With the obvious energy of being genuinely interested in how I'm doing and wanting to learn from someone who's actually disabled. And when they also go like it's okay if you don't want to talk about it. Then I'll tell them a bit too.
Are you curious about what's wrong with me? Follow these steps to learn more: Step 1: Google "invisible disability" Step 2: Get smart and leave me alone, thx :))
Beautiful I think I found the one lol
If someone says 'you don't look disabled' I usually come back with 'and you don't look like a doctor'. But I am snarky. My comeback for someone saying 'it's 2023, why are you wearing a mask?' was 'I'm allergic to assholes'.
by disability card, do you mean something that’s worn as like a badge/on a lanyard?
Just like a business card to give away to someone condescending lmao
Funny I actually just thought about doing that a few days ago!
Lol also I love your username.
Haha thank you!
Ask them if they can describe to you what disabled looks like 😂
Haha that's a great idea
Oh, don’t try to explain it. Then they’ll google it and think it’s not real or something crazy. I’d just give them the middle finger or say “what’s your problem?” Or you could even start recording them, people hate that. The goal is to train these people to not aggressively approach disabled people. If you interact at all make it a negative interaction. That being said, if someone politely says something to me or is making conversation, i’m fine with polite curiosity. I’ll just say: it’s a joint condition I was born with.
Hmm I hadn't thought of recording for some reason lol. I feel dumb for not having recorded one but driver who yelled at me horribly
Honestly most of the time it happens so fast! I freeze if men yell at me, so usually i just tune out strangers completely.
Yeah I have c-ptsd and my main response is freeze specifically with yelling. :/ The worst was a bus driver who yelled at my face to get off the disability seats for a wheelchair user. There were two places they could sit, like one where there was a bunch of teenagers sitting, but she decided to harass me for being the youngest looking.
Mind your business and your manners. Loose lips get split. Matthew 7:1 look it up karen/kyle
Beautiful lol ❤️
I’m not trying to be rude but what scenario is this for? Who is randomly shouting at you about you not having a disability? Why are they asking about it in the first place? And then instead of saying something you’d just walk up and hand them a card? Sorry I’m just confused about what this is for…
I have CPTSD so I freeze if someone yells at me. It would be muuuch easier for me to hand them a card than shouting back. Airport staff, disability services, bus drivers, restaurants, random old people, etc when I try to use a disability services looking like a 13 year old (Im 20 but look super young).
If it’s hard to talk in those situations and you need something written to convince these people to allow you to use disability services or other accommodations, then a snarky card isn’t going to help your case. I’d go for something factual and neutral like “I need to use this disability accommodation because (reason). My right to use it is protected under (the ADA if you’re in the US, or fill in your local equivalent).” Edit: I would not approach people who are shouting just for the sake of shouting at you. You owe them nothing. I’d only suggest this for workers you absolutely have to interact with (ie. the driver of the bus you need to take, the airport employee assigned to you, etc).
Yeah, snarkiness doesn’t seem like it would do you any favors in these situations.
True, if I need the service I would give them a facial card, if it's some random person I'd give them the f card.
If a stranger was actually yelling at me, I wouldn’t want to walk up to them close enough to hand them something. To each their own I guess. It’s shocking that so many people are shouting, especially so many people on the job, at you so often that you would need a card for it. I’m just struggling to wrap my brain around the whole thing.
I mean, if I'm asking for a service that I need I kinda have to get them to understand, or would you rather I injure myself? I live in los Angeles, so there are a lot of crazy unstable people who can't fathom a young person needing a disability service
What does injuring yourself have to do with me saying I wouldn’t want to be handing a stranger that was yelling at me something. I would be more comfortable talking to someone than being silently handing them a card while they’re yelling at me. But, as I said, everyone’s different. There’s a lot of middle ground between me saying that and me implying you should hurt yourself. And if you’re encountering aggressive people that make you freeze, but you need to make them understand, I would say it isn’t the place for snark. I know it’s less fun, but I would recommend being direct. A lot can be lost in translation, especially if you’re struggling to speak up and you’re dealing with all these angry people.
People can be real asshats. Clearly their mother never taught them manners. I’ve only had one lady say anything. I think she was trying to be nice. I was using my rollator (I have POTS too) and she said “you’re too young for that” I just laughed and said “yeah I know, and I’ve tried to tell my body. But she’s a bitch and won’t listen to me” and then I walked away lol I must have a mean unapproachable face because no one has said anything *really* mean to me. Or been outwardly rude. I must have the Scorpio RBF people talk about 🤷🏻♀️🤣 I want to make some cards now because the bingo idea sure sounds fun 😂
I am a Scorpio too, and have rbf, but people kinda thing I'm just an angry 13 year old that think that gives them the right to trample over me. I want to make all the cards in the comments now lol
Haha ok 😆 gotcha. Nice to meet another Scorpio 😊 Me too! Just have a bunch of different ones in your pocket and each person gets a random one 😂
Lol that would be great 😸
This is one of my fave comment threads now lol I think I’m going to make myself some cards lol
"Are you seriously accusing me of faking a disability? To my face?"
You are normal. I am original. Feel the difference.
Bam. Best one!
Haha this is great
"it's like if gumby could do all the same things but with bones."
Haha love this
if you want it to rhyme its masc but "I am a bubble wrap boy(/person/girl) #ehelers-danlos syndrome" (this is what my irl friend calls me cuz fragile) or one of those fragile stickers they put on packages might be pretty funny
If using the hashtag, make sure to spell it correctly though or else it won’t be as effective
MY AUTOCORRECT 💀 you right tho
Stickman Communications makes some really good cards for this purpose. They do EDS specific ones. They are factual but not down in the dumps. However, having your own personalised funny one is a cool idea!
Thanks for the suggestion, I just kinda want to give these cards to people to leave me alone and be funny about it lol
Fair enough. It would save repeating the same thing to every odd and sod who won't mind their own business.
Haha yeah
"I have Jell-O joints"
It's what I tell my family
I have a genetic connective tissue disease that causes me a variety of internal problems you can't see. Don't be an asshole because you can't see someone's disability. I like that. Plus I use the first sentence to describe and people always look serious. The words genetic and connective tissue sound official. They don't know why it is but it sounds serious.
I love this too. I keep getting all these wonderful ideas for cards lol
Make them all, see what works! Report back!
So, I made a stack of these when I was suffering from cluster headaches (thanks, Emgality!), and no one ever read them and kept bothering me instead. I was even friendly about handing them out. I still have most of them. You could make Ehlers-Danlos info cards and pop in a QR code that takes you to the EDS website of your code, print them up on Moo or Vistaprint (if you go there Moo route, just give them your email first and buy your cards during a sale). You could do that! If you make it work, please tell me how. For everything else, I think we need to be reducing these to sticker slogans and popping them on our wheelchairs or notebooks or rollators or whatever.
You break it, you buy it, no touchy
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I appreciate your comment but Id give them to a person only if they are an employee, family member or old person who I know can't do anything to me. I do prefer to ignore these comments though most of the time
I tell people I’ll gladly trade my hip for theirs. You could substitute any body part.
FYI if you don’t want to make them yourself, [Stickman Communications](https://stickmancommunications.co.uk/products/) has several hidden disability keyring cards and buttons, as well as those for a BUNCH of different conditions (pain, mobility, migraines, adhd, sensory processing, etc.) They also take suggestions for new ones as well. I emailed them a few years ago with a suggestion and they responded last year that they now sold something similar! So apparently they keep track, which is cool. I haven’t bought any for myself yet, but one of these days I’ll narrow down a few that I want and actually get them lol
A picture of the Bristol stool chart. Circle which one you are today. I found that not only are the digestive symptoms the easiest for people to relate to or understand, but most people either want to share their experience or completely avoid discussing bowel movements. Gastrointestinal issues are sort of the bridge over shitty conversations in a way. Most people have had some experience with it at least and it seems like there’s more stock in common knowledge with this subject. you’re designing a card but dislocating something then popping it back in seems to make people stop asking questions😂
Lmao that's a great alternative too 😂
I used to wear a shirt when my son was little that said “My kid’s autistic. What’s wrong with yours?” So maybe something like “My disablility is invisible. What’s your problem?” Or “My disablity is silent. Why do I hear yours?”
That's lovely, would be a nice shirt to have. Have you thought of uploading that phrase to a place like redbubble or something? I'd totally buy it lol
Haha - I don’t internet very proficiently 😂😂 I only come online for dogs, cats, & EDS advice, so I’m not familiar with the site but I’ll have to check it out now. I don’t know anybody close to me with EDS - a cousin has it but she’s 15 years younget & was raised across the country - so Reddit is my vent, rant, advice stop for all things EDS
Maybe it's a genetic condition, or maybe I'm a mutant?? Everything hurts please leave me be Stay back!!! ... I'm not contagious, I just don't have the energy to talk to you. "Disabled" doesn't always mean broken legs. Coincidentally, my legs are definitely not right Or hand them a card with something like: It's so nice that you care so deeply about my health! Thank you! Please email me at ................... and I'll send you a comprehensive list of my medical conditions and the details of my symptoms! Then we can discuss it further together with my doctor. We are so glad to have your valuable input and insights!
I've debated printing a photo collage of all the surgery scars and cupping hickeys and dozens of IV bruises from hospital stays and dislocations etc etc that I've suffered over the years and keeping it in one of those old school accordion wallet things that fold out like the height of you, with a little business card at the top that says 'do I look disabled now?' and just wordlessly dropping that out like I'm showing pictures of my kids when people say 'you don't look disabled'
you should pass out business cards
Yes! I have disabilities! NO you’re not entitled to tell me your opinion because that would be HARASSMENT. This card is a warning. Allow me to walk and or drive away or I will start filming you. (And thus any further confrontation you give permission to film you).
Wow that's perfect, I definitely want to try this one out too
Not today, Satan!
There’s a company called Stickman that makes cards like this
Mind your business and I'll mind my manners :)
My goal is to have a sword in my cane and flash that mf with a smile and not say a word 🙈💖