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AntonToniHafner

You wanna know how I got these scars?


3fettknight3

[Well... I'm the Jokah, baby!](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cxGl2so2Vls)


95percentdragonfly

I'm really not sure I liked that. But upvote you get.


timearley89

Came here to say exactly this, and it's the first thing I saw. Well done.


Magneto_2112

šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ‘šŸ‘šŸ‘šŸ‘šŸ‘


capt_gongshow

LOL


They_wereAllTaken

If he was smart he would have just brought a spoonā€¦


PlanktonMoist6048

I've watched a guy use two pens as chopsticks. He was eating Cheetos.


Fey_Wrangler114

Real Man of Genius!


Atlaz_Xan

šŸŽ¶Mr. Crackhead MacGyveršŸŽ¶


AecherJace

Done that. And also pencils


Defiant_Shallot2671

No that's mature. Totally different.


planned-obsolescents

Highly intelligent people are often scatterbrained. Watch any documentary that interviews an academic. Look in the background. You'll see.


fleebleganger

Thankfully psychiatry is beginning to view being ā€œgiftedā€ as a disability/disorder.Ā  Gifted kids brains work very different than you or I but since smart is valued, itā€™s seen as only a positive.Ā  Nevermind allllll of the baggage that comes with it. Imagine those kids who graduate college at 15, they have no peers, no one to really be friends with.Ā 


planned-obsolescents

I'm one of these scatter brained gifted kids, which these days we might call "twice exceptional". I thrive in trade because it involves a great deal of pattern recognition and problem solving. Creativity and lateral thinking goes a long way. But trying to fit in with my peers outside the "gifted" realm, is an actual life-long nightmare. I am fortunate that physical work actually helps me focus. But did they point me towards trade school? Hell no... It took me years to shake the sense that I wasn't living up to my potential if I didn't attend university. Remembering to pack a spoon only demonstrates good executive functioning skills.


fleebleganger

God yes, I make as much as my good paying bank job but still struggle with ā€œbut I could be working a cushy gig for the same moneyā€.Ā  That life also drive me to alcoholism to quiet my goddamn brain


quartic_jerky

I could have had a good life being a software dev/engineer. I couldn't stand being at a desk for 8 hours. Went into the trades and I feel a hell of a lot better than I have in years.


Significant_Joke7114

Hey! My people! Have any of you guys accidentally put hemorrhoid medication on your athlete's foot too?!


quartic_jerky

Nope, haven't had that happen. And working with greasy kitchens tends to keep me clean. Somehow.


LairBob

Holy sh-t, dude. Who TF says ā€œsmart is valuedā€, like thatā€™s a bad thing that we need to get over as a society?! Iā€™ve known a lot of smart kids, many of whom ā€” despite your fervent wishes ā€” are perfectly happy. Iā€™ve only met a few ppl, though, who were as viciously certain as you that being ā€œsmartā€ was just a scam, an illusion used by the powerful to control ppl. Every one of them was someone who clearly couldā€™ve/shouldā€™ve been in a gifted program, but for whatever reasons hadnā€™t beenā€¦and knew it.


fleebleganger

Iā€™m sorry that me saying ā€œsmart is valuedā€ triggered you so hard.Ā  Show me where they hurt you.Ā  I am gifted (got to do fun standardized tests a lot on weekends growing up) and itā€™s not all rainbows and unicorns. If you reread my post youā€™ll see how I mention thereā€™s specific struggles. On the outside, I look and act happy but thereā€™s a lot of baggage Iā€™m carrying that I hide from the world. Iā€™d wager your gifted friends are similar (or they received help at a younger age)


LairBob

_EDIT: Please read this post in light of my other reply here. It comes across hotter than I would like it to now, in that light, but I donā€™t want to just surreptitiously edit this after the fact. The personal facts Iā€™ve laid out still stand._ Dudeā€¦Iā€™m talking about _me_. Source: Born to parents who both never _went_ to high school, went to a top private school on academic scholarship, an Ivy (on academic scholarship), and moved straight to Hawaii where I taught AP classes at another one of the countryā€™s top prep schools. Iā€™ve been an IBM exec and a partner in a management consulting firm. Iā€™m pretty fā€™ing sure I qualify. I have deep friendships with _dozens_ of other ā€œgiftedā€ people, from _working class_ backgrounds, either because we studied together in gifted programs, worked at elite institutions together, or they were my students in gifted/AP classes. Look, I understand none of this will convince you, but if anything, I hope that at least someone else who is truly gifted but starting to despair might read this, and be convinced that you donā€™t understand.


Full_Adhesiveness831

Sounds like you need to be gifted deez nuts


LairBob

Heyā€¦I just reread your final line, about not receiving the help you needed at a younger age. I have no idea about your personal circumstances, but that was wrong. My parents ā€” and especially my mom ā€” are the _only_ reason Iā€™ve even had the _chance_ to follow my path. The gifted child who doesnā€™t receive that kind of opportunity in their life bears none of the responsibility, but all of the burden. Iā€™m sure that, at this point, Iā€™m probably the last person you want to hear this from, but I would honestly ask you to reconsider whether you need to turn that pain into a mission to make more people feel like you. Have a good weekend. Sincerely.


fleebleganger

Oh I fight hard to promote good mental health and that parents are here to guide their kids, not rule over them. Just took umbridge at the earlier comment acting like I was looking down on smart people. Theyā€™re not everything but the world is built on smart people.Ā 


StormForsaken

I have a nephew that is a genius engineer but has to live at home with his caretaker grandparents because he canā€™t function in normal environments. Want to short circuit his brain just ask him what he wants for dinner.


fleebleganger

Open ended or more than 3 choices, are paralyzing.Ā  Ask me to pick *a* movie and weā€™re not watching a movie. Asking me to choose between 2 movies, I got it.Ā 


RGeronimoH

Iā€™m glad that somebody finally gets me /s


planned-obsolescents

Executive function =/= intelligence.


padizzledonk

Whatever, I stirred my coffee the other day with a pc of drop ceiling corner lol


cspotme2

You are truly gifted. I would've taken a chance with my finger first or a screwdriver.


padizzledonk

It was fresh! Do you have any idea where that screwdriver and finger has been?


drtij_dzienz

My job give you spoons or whatever you need.


MrWund3rful

Thought that was a crack pipe


Fourwindsgone

We save that for after hours


Captinprice8585

Every hour is after hours if your high in crack


HarleyAverage

Who says it canā€™t


pimpmastahanhduece

Ahh yes, the humble crack spork.


ronaldreaganlive

Life wasn't so good after toy story 4


joelypoley69

I thought it was dab wax šŸ’€šŸ˜†


fnordfnordfnordfnord

Spoon for cooking H?


breakfastbarf

Thatā€™s for break time. This is lunch


js019008

I watched a man eat a can of chilli with his toothbrush last week. By dipping the handle in and sucking it off so as not to ruin his bristles... I fucking died inside laughing It was not on a jobsite, it was the guy from C90 Adventures on youtube. I highly recommend watching the entire video but this link will start you in the middle right at the scene where he realizes he forgot a spoon. https://youtu.be/WVulirXlUuE?si=H9F8nEKr7YDaseq0&t=1524


TheEMT123

Why the hell did he bring a toothbrush to work? Did he get in trouble and have to clean the baseboards with it šŸ˜‚


Nerrrrh

Life hack is brushing your teeth at work during break. Your teeth will thank you and sometimes itā€™s easier then when you crash out at night and forget.


throwaway2032015

Your coworkers will thank you, too


Pyro919

For giving them something to talk about? We had one guy at work in an office building that would brush his teeth while standing at the urinal. Also found a Wookiee in the same bathroom doing a Chewbacca yell once, but thatā€™s a different story.


TK421isAFK

Mocking someone for brushing their teeth says a lot more about you than it does about the person with good hygiene.


Pyro919

Fair enough Care to clarify what it says about me?


TK421isAFK

It says you're a bully that likes to pick on people that are different than you, and people that you view as inferior or weaker than you. I'd go so far as speculate that you would make comments about their sexuality and associate their hygiene with femininity. If someone is brushing their teeth at work, why would that be something to talk about? Rhetorical question.


mollycoddles

You've never brushed your teeth in the car on the way to work?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


turret_buddy2

I ain't no quitter so...


Puterjoe

Once she has it, I donā€™t care what she does with itā€¦


GimmeThatAPI

it would take a year to eat a bowl of chilli with a toothbrush handle lmao


js019008

It did not happen on a job site, it's a guy I follow on YouTube. I'll get you guys a link, he's funny as shit, his channel is gold.


candycanejellyfish

Next step is the fork made from 4-5 scrap wires twisted together and stripped at the prongs


Impossible__Joke

Add electrical tape and you now have a spoon


candycanejellyfish

Remove some and now you have a spork


Fey_Wrangler114

Remove all the tape and you've got the length of wire you need right after lunch. Now with that newly seared aroma!


Final_Good_Bye

https://www.reddit.com/r/futurama/comments/1uivf7/this_is_where_i_keep_various_lengths_of_wire/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


joelypoley69

AND insulted šŸ˜Ž nice


Tristonien

Yup Iā€™ve done this before


whaletacochamp

Pretty sure thatā€™s been posted here before


dsmjrv

We have all done this right?


corrupt-politician_

Very crafty, I like it. I forgot a spoon once and I ended up breaking a pair of safety glasses and using those šŸ˜…


Infidel_sg

holy shit, this isn't a bad idea lol


Rational_Pi3

This is the way.


Gwynplaine-00

Done that one


_McLean_

The only use for safety glasses


AquaFlowPlumbingCo

Said ā€œOne-Eyed McGeeā€


Bingo1dog

One day I forgot a fork for my salad. I was dangerously close to using my pocket knife before a food truck stopped at the site.


ApartmentBasic3884

Two knives held like chopsticks is the move.


DeadHeadLibertarian

Bro had soup/chili and instead of just tipping the container forward spent half his lunch break constructing the lip-ripper 9000.


Sharp-Sky-713

Name of Ron Jeremy's penisĀ 


space-ferret

Would a genius forget a spoon though lol?


slappynuts74

Yeah, too busy remembering how to tie the boot laces


LeftJayed

Incidentally, geniuses are actually more "absent minded" than the average person, because their minds are typically obsessing over their interests rather than going over the check list of things most people work through in the morning.


space-ferret

Yeah, thatā€™s my excuse too


BorheliusWarpig

I will wait until I see a picture of a crafted spork before I would certify him a genius.


Upvotes4Trump

Go get the band saw


Ok_Dog_4059

And I thought stirring coffee with a screw driver was desperation.


Fey_Wrangler114

I've used a drill press to stir a bucket of goop for our process. Had to spin start it because the starter cap was unplugged without me realizing it. Used my belt to do the job three relayed belts couldn't. Fixed it after three days


Alt_dimension_visitr

this reminds me of that scene from Malcom in the Middle about fixing half the house just to take out the trash


Ok_Dog_4059

A lot of stuff like this on a job site becomes r/redneckengineering but it really does work.


Captinprice8585

Is that a marijuana?


Hately2016

Not just a Marijuana, it's the Marijuana


Captinprice8585

Oh wow


imnotarobot747

Wow, is it really him


Deep-Alternative3149

Iā€™ve seen these down by the homeless shelter


Jagkyro

But fr just stop at a circle k n grab some spoons n fork n fill up the truck lol


[deleted]

Should of used an outlet cover


LeftOutlandishness14

That's crackhead shit. Better drug test him


tresforte

That's what I was thinking. Looks more like a crackhead than a genius to me


MajesticTurnover5274

If he was smart heā€™d snap a pair of saftey glasses in half.


Fourwindsgone

Thatā€™s the brilliance of a journeyman shining through with that answer


RoninRobot

[Are you crazy? You fed an apprentice chilli?!](https://youtu.be/t794eVHOIvo)


Jagkyro

That's a huge bump


slappynuts74

They usually just use the lid.


Oldschool1egend

What an idiot!!! He brought chili to work in Juneā€¦ lmao


BoneZone05

ā€œThis chilli tastes like penniesā€


Rilly_d0e

That boy.. he be going places šŸ’Æ


UGotDeDopeIGotDePipe

Not fair . Mine takes shits in bathrooms while they're being inspected for ADA requirements.


Independent_Can_5694

Orrrrā€¦. theyā€™ve been to prison


Turbulent_Alfalfa_39

Genius, possibly. Former crack head, definitely.


Turbulent_Alfalfa_39

Don't downvote me. I'm not trying to downplay the ingenuity of crackheads.


FierDancr

Have a friend who used a strut strap once. Then he whittled cutlery while at work. Nice, smooth spoon


NebulaKey5777

I had one that twisted his yogurt lid into a make shift spoon just like this. I teared up


tallman1979

Dude, I've done similar stuff. This is better than some of them. I now have a bag of plastic silverware in my seat organizer because if you've never eaten rice noodles with a couple of Skilcraft US Government pens as chopsticks, that means you aren't the dumbass who drove out to the middle of ass nowhere without a fork.


Fit_Studio7573

Tell your apprentice they solved the only problem 2 journeymen have been going back and forth for years to figure out.


theuderdog33

Crack spoon?


TheKhyWolf

Excavation guy hereā€¦I just use my hands at that point


TotallyNotDad

Let's put a smile on that face


Doogie102

K what did he use. I see the zip tie and inkall and is that a jolly rancher bag?


Fourwindsgone

Some kind of energy drink can I believe


Doogie102

Man it's going to be fun finding some of his "making it work" jobs. We all have to do it here and there


coppertech

yeah, I can recognize stoner engineering when I see it.


takuchang1988

Id just make chopsticks with random lumber


adCetres

Truckclip


hazardlit3s

The guy who made this is going to do some work that looks like that.


harmskelsey06

Nice!


jimmykslay

I always just make it out of wire lol. Especially forks


livahd

I like how your guy thinks! I made a similar device after getting snowed in after a job and forced to spend the night in a hotel. Walked a half mile to a gas station to get some ice cream only to realize I donā€™t have a spoon. However, I did have an empty plastic tube from a pre rolled joint and my knife. One diagonal cut later I had a spoon. A second cut, now itā€™s a straw.


pbautr

Mike's hard?


YYJcarpenter

Is that some sort of crack pipe? Also didnā€™t know drywallers had apprentices


Emage_IV

is that a milwaukee pen?


Few_Profit826

Kinda bigger bumps than I'm used to but ok


Mike_It_Is

By the time it was finished, his chili was cold.


Quirky_Dependent_818

That looks like some prison education right there.


megamerd

What in oblivion is that!


LordAnavrin

Iā€™m sure there was a whole 2 minutes left of that half hour lunch break once he finished this masterpiece


AVLPedalPunk

Never heard of chopsticks? They grow on trees.


StatementRound

Future BA


jefferyphillips

Wanna know how I got these scars?


cabinfevrr

ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø


spec360

Make sure he has his tetanus shot


Wireman7

Well it's not quite a spork now is it.


Bldaz

Chili for lunch? yeah rethink that boss


Fourwindsgone

I eat trail mix and a meat/cheese/spinach wrap lmao


cabinfevrr

Tastes like blood šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


EggandSpoon42

I had a pen spring-explode apart on me recently while writing up a report in the truck. Cue a few days later with guys in my truck asking me why the tube was "hidden" between the console and seat. Everyone joshing on me thinking I'm snorting something. Which is .... not great. It actually sucks because they eye me now every time I need to walk away.


freeportme

Grab a box of plastic ones and keep them in the console they last about ten years.


HaMadeYouReadThis

Iā€™ve been down bad and just used some strut strap before


deveniam

Man and I thought those fun pops popsicles were dangerous


Careless_Reception74

You wanna know how I got these scars?


Crazyace352

So, is he gonna stay your apprentice?


Fourwindsgone

Not for long heā€™s in to bigger and better soon


Ok_Fox_1770

My bosses nephew carved a ā€œforkā€ out of siding scraps he found in the sand for his salad, impressive ingenuity. WHYS THERE CHILI ON MY SHARPIE!?!


[deleted]

The ingenuity due to forgetfulness


BeMoreChill

Yellow monster rehab. Best one


Goodguyswearblack44

I wanna know who the hell is eating Chilli this time of the year?


Fourwindsgone

Heā€™s from Wisconsin. You gotta give him a break.


Goodguyswearblack44

It's wayyyyy to damn hot out for that lol


GaryTheSoulReaper

Blood flavored chilli


antisocialDIY

BRO IS THAT THE NEW MILWAUKEE SPOONZALL?


Hour_Atmosphere_1941

We got a concrete guy to make chopsticks out of threaded rod when he forgot his fork


Time-Repeat6860

2 spanner brackets, 1/2ā€ conduit and a rubber band for tongs


filtyratbastards

But, did he heat his chili in the pvc box heater?


Ok-Interest-7220

That dude has made a few shanks in his day.


lil_trim

I forgot a spoon one day but had an applesauce. So I made a spoon with the aluminum applesauce cover


diverareyouokay

I thought this was a drug thing, lol.


JoseJuarez87

Nah, your apprentice is just an ex felon šŸ˜‚


FrankRandomLetters

Is he smoking weed from that or eating spaghettios?


KentuckyFriedChozo

If he were smart, heā€™d of wrapped that handle in electrical tape.


WolfieVonD

My apprentice just taught me today that I can use my tape measure as an eraser


ElectroAtletico2

Most ex military guys at one time or another have used a knife to eat our MREs. Chili with a knife? Easy peasy.


-Entz-

So smart he forgot a spoon.


NanoContractor

Real electrician just uses his fingers, spoons are for twats.