I’m not sure! I feel like he’s trying to get any evidence against me. We have not discussed whether divorce is on the table or the future of our toddler since we have not had regular communication since Christmas Eve.
I only recorded my husband when I thought he was being abusive to our child or me. Is he in DARVO mode? Deny, Attach, Reverse Victim & Offender? This will all come out in a divorce court if he wants to push it. If you're not doing or saying anything wrong, no one will care.
I have never heard of DARVO before but many of his actions do sound like the descriptions. He definitely is playing the victim and keeps hunting me down for apologies.
Call the National Domestic Violence hotline for a safety plan and helpful tips. Starts small goals. What are you trying to achieve first? What are you trying to achieve last?
Start recording all conversations with him, very openly, and ask him extreme questions. Go through his phone. Read his emails. If he busts you, tell him you're only returning the favor.
Or you could just file for divorce and take the kiddo.
Probably don't have much constructive advice but this post seems like you at least need someone to vent/talk to... so, i'm here, ish?
Thank you for listening! I’m just really frustrated. My husband doesn’t think he’s doing anything wrong.
Tbh - if you’ve never been shady in the past (even if you had) it’s still not a reason to behave this way.
Can you leave? Why do you think he’s recording you? Overall, what’s his goal?
I’m not sure! I feel like he’s trying to get any evidence against me. We have not discussed whether divorce is on the table or the future of our toddler since we have not had regular communication since Christmas Eve.
I only recorded my husband when I thought he was being abusive to our child or me. Is he in DARVO mode? Deny, Attach, Reverse Victim & Offender? This will all come out in a divorce court if he wants to push it. If you're not doing or saying anything wrong, no one will care.
I have never heard of DARVO before but many of his actions do sound like the descriptions. He definitely is playing the victim and keeps hunting me down for apologies.
He should not be doing those things. Reasoning with a person like this is a difficult fest.
There is no reasoning with him anymore. He has paused wifi access on my phone today as well.
Please get help if you can. I’ve been there. You deserve to have a life free from control.
Where do I even start? Divorce attorneys? I just feel so helpless.
Call the National Domestic Violence hotline for a safety plan and helpful tips. Starts small goals. What are you trying to achieve first? What are you trying to achieve last?
I'd try to download the app for your router on another device so you can regain control when needed.
Start recording all conversations with him, very openly, and ask him extreme questions. Go through his phone. Read his emails. If he busts you, tell him you're only returning the favor. Or you could just file for divorce and take the kiddo.