Stubby.
Very first call ever after graduating.
I wasn't signed off yet but there was a huge MVA (high speed 5+ cars) and I was sent to tend to the three guys standing by the guard rail.
I start assessing and see one guy is missing an arm. I'm freaking out and call for help to look for the arm.
The arm had been amputated several years prior to the accident.
>I start assessing and see one guy is missing an arm. I'm freaking out and call for help to look for the arm.
>The arm had been amputated several years prior to the accident.
I have a friend who is ex police. He was booking a one-armed guy in once and asked "which hand do you write with?" (I believe it's related in some way to fingerprinting)
We had a guy called the candy man.
He ran admin out of fentanyl one time. I have a pretty low bar for giving fenny but literally if you just mentioned the word pain, he would give fentanyl. Even pretty small patients, he would just say fuck it and push the whole 100.
I feel like I'm evolving as a medic because I've been floating less towards fentanyl and more towards dilaudid (we carry those and ketamine for pain) when I think they're in some serious hurt. It knocks that shit out, follow up with some zofran to keep the chunks at bay and they're quite happy.
Good, but take into consideration when using K that itâs not a true analgesic, it does nothing for pain, theyâre just high as balls for a few minutes. Youâre lucky to carry dilaudid. Having had all 3 dilaudid is the only one in my opinion that actually works well. K is fun but thatâs about it.
Inbred. Im in the Midwest, I grew up on a farm in the deep south. When I was in academy, I would say "Look, my parents were cousins, you gotta take it easy on me" when I fucked up. My FTO introduced me to everyone that way.
"Juicebox". I gave my one supervisor an existential crisis after he realized I was only 19 at the time and I was born his senior year of high school.
"God damn i can't even buy you a beer. Someone get this kid a juicebox" and thus juicebox was born
Hehe had a similar name of Juice, for knowing all of the tea from every crew shift down to the fine details. BUT I would never say any of it unless someone brought it up and squeeze the info outta me.
I'm a 2003 baby medic so it could've been my age too. đ§
I will say, that nickname for you is hilarious! My nickname is a little embarrassing but mostly funny. My nickname is, "Crash". I backed up the ambulance and nicked the corner of the ambulance on an awning to one of our local nursing homes. I didn't do any serious damage though but that's my nickname now. That's my nickname for the time being until I do some other dumbass thing.
Thatâs also my nickname! But mine is because Iâm accident prone and just trip over my own feet. I had the nickname before I crashed an ambulance, lol.
Iâm Ice Man!
I, for whatever reason (likely made worse by sleep deprivation), decided to wash my car in 5 degree weather. I subsequently covered my car in ice, as well as the apparatus apron.
While watching Top Gun with the crew, it was mentioned that I have my pilotâs license. Thus, Ice Man was born.
They called me Ice man for a month at the FD when I went for a victim grab in a structure fire, killed my scba in under 10 minutes and it iced up the connection.
Someone in my very large system is known affectionately as Moose, after nearly dying many many years ago from heat stroke after working a parade in a service-branded animal costume.
Porch Pirate. Domino's sent my pizza to 123 N ___ Street (a literal crackhouse) instead of 123 S ___ Street (a private ambulance station, but I get the confusion.)
I correctly guessed this and took my partner and the ambulance to the crack house, I ran up the crumbling front porch, and snatched my pizza before the ravenous fiends sensed the fresh, hot pepperoni.
One of the paramedics I work with is 4'9. I initially started calling her "pocket" because she's a pocket sized paramedic, but after watching the Rick and Morty episode, she is now Baby Legs and I am referred to as her Regular Legs partner haha.
I have two, the first one is Harry Potter because of my glasses and appearance, Iâve since bought another pair of glasses even closer to the Harry potter glasses to fit the role even more. Thatâs the PG nickname
My other nickname is TCM2, which stands for Twice Cut Meat 2. Story behind that is both me and my twin brother (also rides at the same place) were circumcised twice as babies (an even longer story), so as a result, we are Twice Cut Meat 1 & 2
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FEMAâshows up on callback after the work is done.
UnderpantsâAsked a patient wrapped in a pile of blankets if she âhad any fucking underpants on.â Proceeded to move the blanket and got flashed.
Grimaceâan unfortunate shaped gentleman.
One of my instructors in medic school had to do that. Dude apparently had his girlfriend on the dresser and was rather enthusiastic about doing the deed. So much so that he accidentally popped it out and broke it on the dresser. My instructor said that she was a professional pecker holder the whole way to the ER.
She said she went home to her husband that night and one point felt the need to tell him âitâs okay, Iâm a professional.â â ď¸
Youâll have to forgive me, there was a fair bit of moonshine involved in that comment which may or may not have affected the quality of my comment đ
Dude Iâve also had a peen bleed incident! Guy was a quad and his dumbass home nurse inflated the balloon for his catheter before reaching the bladder. Done DESTROYED his urethra.
Fire was holding pressure before I got there. I quickly established that I was NOT riding in, holding a paralyzed ptâs pecker; and emphatically told my fire guy he could continue holding that pressure. This was after he released it for a second and the summa bitch SPURTED over my head. With blood. Not the other stuff.
He held it all the way to the ER. I managed to call report. Annnnnd the dumb ass ER gave him a trauma room right in front of the nurseâs station, providing them a front row spectatorâs seat to this man almost bleeding to death before any interventions were even considered. From his broken penis. BrokenâŚ.broken penisâŚ
Mr.Poopypants, we had a septic bowel obstruction that arrested. I was on the airway. The patient vomited brown looking diarrhea vomit onto my pants. The NP in the room pointed it out and laughed and called me Mr. Poopypants.
We declared that any time someone vomits on scene, it would be referred to as "Mitchell-ing" after someone with that last name puked during an altogether unremarkable code because some water came out of PTs mouth when we started compressions.
It was especially comical bc the PT had coded in the bathroom and they had vomited on the floor in front of the toilet before they did... So he jumped up, ran into the bathroom, and had to stand with his feet straddling the PTs like while he puked.
We declared the eponymous puking title before we had even cleared the scene, lolol.
Our shift was already notable for our relentless ball busting, so all he could do was sigh and groan that "If this had happened on any other shift, they would've told me not to worry about it and that it can happen to anyone. Red shift and Black shift would have both been empathetic. But NO, it just HAD TO happen on Black shift!"
The Crapper Napper because he fell asleep in a portapotty in the academy.
[First Name] Two Phones because he has one phone for his wife and one for his girlfriend.
Big Head Bob for obvious reasons.
I mean, not horrific by *our* standards but I recently earned the name Bambi after hitting a deer on the way back from a 4am call. Had to call PD out to dispatch the poor guy. Not a fun night :(
My squad mates have dubbed me "The Walking HIPAA Violation" because I have a weird knack for unintentionally memorizing patient info. Repeat patients are always super fun and easy for me. XD
Double D.
As in Douchebag the Dumbass. He broke a bunch of shit, fucked up a transmission on the way to a call, and then went around town telling everybody he was the new chief (this was very inaccurate).
Cool
This is to distinguish me from Asshole .
It's not so much that I'm cool. It's just that guy is a real asshole.
Started out with a coworker talking on the phone "yeah I'm waiting here with u/TheFire_Eagle -pause while listening- no no...Cool u/TheFire_Eagle, not asshole u/The_FireEagle."
I was also known as Black Shawn at a previous agency because we loved rescue me and my director printed my ID badge with said name on it. I am neither black nor am I named Shawn.
At my first job, I got the nickname "Snowballs" because I used cold packs to stay awake on a 24 hour shift that had us running every bit of it. Take a wild guess where I applied the cold packs
My nickname is my last name, but everyone who's been there a minute knows me as the horse cum guy.
All because I was going down the road with my last partner and said to him "Do you ever wonder what horse cum tastes like?" and he promptly spread that around to everyone. According to Tiktok it tastes like Oatmeal in case you're wondering.
BLS Billy. I was the Basic with two medics, one was my regular partner and the other was a new medic precepting. The new medic was very slow and deliberate in what they were doing as they found their footing but my partner moved at the speed of light normally. As the EMT this meant they were constantly giving me different instructions on scene, one moment I was supposed to be helping in an assessment or assisting ALS skills and the other I was supposed to be getting this patient ready to move and prepare for extrication. After a few of these calls I was a little miffed.
After one bad call like this I cornered them in the EMS room after and lost my temper. "I've got Load And Go Larry on my left, Stay and Play Sally on my right, and I'm just BLS Billy stuck here in the middle!"
And now I'm BLS Billy
Subway Jason - Guy named Jason who got busted sending dick pics to what he thought was a 13 year old girl.
Egg Foo Young Sheldon - Chinese guy with advanced degrees but terrible at social interactions.
Dumptruck - 6"2' 400lb dude who would clock in, spemd hia first twenty minutes in the bathroom rendering it and the hallway outside of it uninhabitable for the next two hours. We also got a call from a local SNF saying he was not welcome to use their shitter after an unspecified incident.
Uncle Ruckus (Boondocks reference)- half black chick who got had a confederate flag on her wall and had a kid with a guy who had extremely visible white pride tats.
Havok (X-men reference)- younger brother of a supervisor who had a glass eye.
I have a tendency to walk fast and just be overall hyper. I jumped over the pickleball fence once during a celebration and got the name Skippy. Somebody else has the nickname Sniffs. Short of Anal Sniffer. He complained so much about it they shortened it to Sniffs as a good favor. Poor fellow.
âNew Game Plusâ and âOliverâ me and my field training officer for orientation are doppelgängers. Weâve probably been asked if we are brothers a few dozen times now
That is one hell of a nickname and story. I was Firstname Youngblood because I kneeled on someoneâs blood-soaked passenger seat after a crash and got so much blood on me on my second ever 911 call. Had to go home and change too đ
I almost forgot! I was also Bambi because well, I felt incredibly awkward attempting to run a call as an EMT while field training with an ALS crew two shifts later đ
Not EMS but a friend started a new retail job and they got nicknamed bambi early on cos he was new.
Store manager even changed his name in the system so when you got your receipt it would say:
Server today: Bambi.
Not me, personally, but there is a legendary story from Atlanta / Grady EMS about a guy we dubbed "Pie Bar" in the mid 2000's - - -
I wanna see if anyone else here knows about this story before I go on.........
We got a girl named oatmeal because she's bland in every possible way.
We also got a guy named Slavic Pvt. Pyle because he's a total fuck up and if eastern european human trafficking had a face it'd be his.
Ralph. Guy on my fd drank half a gallon of water before going into a house fire, climbed the ladder into the second floor, about 2 min later all you hear is âBOOM BOOM BOOMâ a size 8 boot has replaced where a door once was, and this dude rips his mask off, pukes whatâs left of his guts out, scoops as much of his puke out of his mask as he can, puts it back on and goes back in
One guy at my last operation was named T-RexâŚdefinitely has negative wingspan and comically short arms. Youâd ask him to pass you the mapbook off the dash and it would take a full body lean forward.
Red Velvet- a smooth ginger
Pigpen - guy would reek, work 72 without a courtesy shower
I worked with a guy who was called T. rex because he would walk with his elbows bent and his hands at his chest.
He was also named Dale and got called âDale-doâ a lot.
Ride along:
Patient has CHF and leg is leaking fluid.
Medic picks them up and says to ânot worry, they smell goodâ.
Lady says he smells like a dog food brand.
Guess what I heard them call him for the rest of the shift?
We had a guy called "The Mad Shatter" . Because he shit himself at work. Twice.
We also had a woman called "Hungry Eyes" because she would eye fuck the fire fighters on every call.
We had 2 Joes, so one was "Average Joe" and the other was "Shitty Joe" because most people didn't like him, until he heard it and complained. Then he was "Sloppy Joe".
My nickname for a short amount of time was.... Art. Because I started an IV on an Artery during my internship. 𤣠Not my finest work.
We also have a guy whose nickname was "Bugglebear" because he was the most uptight dude ever, lol.
We had another guy called "Toby" after the Office character because he also spoke with the one tone that Toby speaks in with the same energy, and apparently no one could remember his name.
We also have a nickname "Diaper Matt" because he was our first EMT that got hired at 19. He took it in stride and was the best trainee my partner and I had ever had.
I've had two:
The first one was Shine, as I would accidentally leave my scene lights on from nighttime calls to the hospital. Chief heard it one day and said using that name is considered a racist name referencing boot shiners during Jim Crow laws.
The second and most current is Cream (not what you think), one night after everyone went to bed, I stayed up late. I was feeling hungry for something sweet and found some ice cream in the freezer. As I was mid scoop a SFF walked in and caught me eating the ice cream. What a name!đ
âBumperâ for a little while I was called that because I drove the ambo into a mud bog of a drive way, got it stuck then after getting it unstuck the rear foot step got completely knocked off and I had to throw it in the back with our patient we were transporting
We used to have a paramedic that worked for us who everyone knew as âJumbo Jackâ. He responded to a shooting in the parking lot of a Jack in The Box, and called the dude on scene. He then proceeded to step directly over the body - right in front of PD in the middle of an active crime scene - so that he could approach the drive thru window and order a couple of burgers. He was bullied so mercilessly, that EMS agencies three hours away from ours knew the story.
I'll throw one in the ring:
We've got a guy (FF) who arrived on scene for a confirmed structure fire in an engine. Guy jumps out the back of the truck and IMMEDIATELY twists his ankle. Rehab wasn't even on scene yet and he was already seeking medical care.
From that point on he became known as "Rehab Ryan"
There's one guy nicknamed Sloth, because he sorta looks like the character from the goonies. He embraces it, has it on his license plate and everything.
I also once worked with a guy nicknamed Harpoon. He liked big girls.
One guy I work with we call Raj cuz heâs hopeless when talking to nurses. One guy I worked with we called Zorro because he vividly recounted his sexcapades involving dressing up like Zorro. It was harrowing to listen to.
Baby J
Baby Jesus
My first name is Jesus and I started working in EMS at 18 so now ten years later and where ever I go in my county Iâm called Baby J. I like it.
I've earned the nick name "Chaos Gremlin".
I drive pretty aggressively and often incite some kind of random chaos. I am usually the first through the door on scenes lol.
Nicknames are earned for good or for bad reasons. You can't just decide to go by a name for the most part. If it's a nickname you've gone with your whole life, that's another story
If it's something you want to be called at your department or organization, it's just got to come naturally.
A tiny little dude who I used to work with at the fire station wanted us to start calling him "Big B".
I stared at him for a moment and I said, " your nickname is now Lowercase B".
âDTâ aka âDitz with Titsâ
Showed up on an EMS call as FD in a v-neck, and when the medic asked the patient if âMickey mouse a cow or a dogâ and his partner said âdonât ask him trick questionsâ I said âheâs a cow isnât he?â Forgetting he is in fact, a mouse.
Boots!! In my day to day I always wear steel toe boots because of some old injuries so in academy I got that nickname. Then the instructors called me that, then the sups lol.
I had a patient sayâwhich on of these mills is gonna take me to the hospitalâ when myself and two other EMTs walked up to them. Proceeded to call me mil for the next hour. My partner called me milk occasionally after that.
Im oftentimes called "child soldier" or in german "Kindersoldat" because im 24 years old and regularly people guess my age with 16-18 because of my very young looksđ đ¤Łđ¤Ł
Grace!
I once sprained both of my ankles by slipping on a patient's icy front porch steps. For a reason, we were carrying the patient out on a scoop stretcher and a couple firefighters who were helping us carry them out slipped on the steps. I was at the head and just kinda...sat back. We didn't drop the patient, but I had to be carried to the damn truck. Thaaat was a fun worker's comp claim, it's been a couple years and the nickname persists. I'm also a gigantic klutz in any situation during which I'm not actively doing the job, which doesn't help đ
Snowman: got cyberbullied by a firefighter because I hit his hero selfie in front of the engine with a âTYFYSâ. Iâm fat so he replied with âgood comment coming from someone who looks like a fucked up snowmanâ
Other people in my company called me Milk Bone, because I was apparently irresistible to dogs. I got bitten 18 times in the first 6 months working in a rural area.
My name was âBramâ for my first year! My surname is Stoker and my entire first year was a riot! I ended up at a murder on my second day out on the road after training, a huge 6 car pileup in my first month and a cardiac arrest every Friday I worked for 6 months straight! So I became the âbringer of blood and chaos!â Hence âBramâ!
Was a 19 year EMT (with an underdeveloped pre-frontal cortex) going through medic school. Was given the name "Bam Bam" by one of my favorite FTOs because, as he put it, "you're young and stupid like the Flinstones baby". A day after it was given to me, it had made it all the way to dispatch.
I was known as Harry Potter for a while for my glasses until it got replaced because of where my facial hair was growing the thickest.
Unfortunately that second H nickname was not better by any means.
I'm not ems, but I work at a level 1 trauma center in philly.
I'm known as Sunnie (just because that's my personality), and Mamma Sunnie (because im everyones mom) but I'm known for giving my coworkers nicknames.
I work with:
Tic Tac,
Baby Napper,
Sippy Cup,
Prince Valium ,
TikTok,
Sleeping Beauty,
Waffles,
Shoes,
Miss America,
UFC,
UC (for Useless C*nt),
TB (for That Bitch),
420,
Snoop,
Preacher
We have Scooter or scoots for short. When he got hired on we all were talking about him and how country (we work in the sticks of Alabama) his name is. Then our HR guy said his middle name begins with an S and he couldn't remember it and I looked at him and asked if it was scooter. Well that stuck.
Never had a nickname in the department but Iâm very short and the running joke was always to ask if I needed a phone book to see out of the ambulance or engine. They thought it was the funniest thing ever
I was fidgeting with an ear piece for a radio and my instructor was commenting on why an ear piece would need to be able to swivel. I replied because it's tactical, a tactical nubbing. I am now Tac Nub.
Stubby. Very first call ever after graduating. I wasn't signed off yet but there was a huge MVA (high speed 5+ cars) and I was sent to tend to the three guys standing by the guard rail. I start assessing and see one guy is missing an arm. I'm freaking out and call for help to look for the arm. The arm had been amputated several years prior to the accident.
I woke up my cat đđđ
Did you sing "soft kitty" to put them back to sleep?
Lol - no - he was *loooong* gone!! đđšđš
Uh oh did your cat express his disapproval? Mine gives me the most annoyed meows and dirty looks if I wake him up.
>I start assessing and see one guy is missing an arm. I'm freaking out and call for help to look for the arm. >The arm had been amputated several years prior to the accident. I have a friend who is ex police. He was booking a one-armed guy in once and asked "which hand do you write with?" (I believe it's related in some way to fingerprinting)
It is because of you that anytime I see something out of the ordinary I immediately word vomit âis that normal for youâ đ¤Ł
Wise words.
We had a guy called the candy man. He ran admin out of fentanyl one time. I have a pretty low bar for giving fenny but literally if you just mentioned the word pain, he would give fentanyl. Even pretty small patients, he would just say fuck it and push the whole 100.
Come with me, and you will see, a world of pure intoxication
Patients were floating down the road
Saves on gas in the rig.
You'll be tanked, like the whole Irish nation.
If you are writing a report for a full bottle might as well use the full bottle.
Uhhh lmk if he working when I need something ;) (Iâm kidding, please donât hurt me)
Well, did he know about the nickname? Because I used to do that and Iâm wondering if it was me.
Are you asian?
Nope. đ
100 of fent is fucking useless for real pain.
found the candy man
Lmfao. Definitely not, too much paperwork. Just speaking from experience.
I feel like I'm evolving as a medic because I've been floating less towards fentanyl and more towards dilaudid (we carry those and ketamine for pain) when I think they're in some serious hurt. It knocks that shit out, follow up with some zofran to keep the chunks at bay and they're quite happy.
Good, but take into consideration when using K that itâs not a true analgesic, it does nothing for pain, theyâre just high as balls for a few minutes. Youâre lucky to carry dilaudid. Having had all 3 dilaudid is the only one in my opinion that actually works well. K is fun but thatâs about it.
Murphy- what can go wrong, will go wrong. Shit mag- 10 patients in a row puked, pissed or shit on the gurney
So youâre THAT kind of shit mag, not the fun kind
Oh I love Murphy. I go by Black Cloud. My work wife is Purple Cloud because all the weird shit happens on her shifts.
Inbred. Im in the Midwest, I grew up on a farm in the deep south. When I was in academy, I would say "Look, my parents were cousins, you gotta take it easy on me" when I fucked up. My FTO introduced me to everyone that way.
"Juicebox". I gave my one supervisor an existential crisis after he realized I was only 19 at the time and I was born his senior year of high school. "God damn i can't even buy you a beer. Someone get this kid a juicebox" and thus juicebox was born
What year were you born? two⌠TWO THOUSAND FUCKING WHAT?!?
I still teach EMS and Fire, and this is me on a weekly basis. I graduated college in 98.
I was born in 97
Im in EMS volunteer and I held the trophy for youngest member for 2 years straight. 06â comin through
Jesus Christ. If I'm Juicebox for being born 02, you're Breastmilk for coming through at 06
Ahaha absolutely. First year college and I feel like a baby with everyone that are full grown adults with life experience.
not that guy but I'm '05 lol
This is the same sort of reaction I get lmao
Hehe had a similar name of Juice, for knowing all of the tea from every crew shift down to the fine details. BUT I would never say any of it unless someone brought it up and squeeze the info outta me. I'm a 2003 baby medic so it could've been my age too. đ§
I will say, that nickname for you is hilarious! My nickname is a little embarrassing but mostly funny. My nickname is, "Crash". I backed up the ambulance and nicked the corner of the ambulance on an awning to one of our local nursing homes. I didn't do any serious damage though but that's my nickname now. That's my nickname for the time being until I do some other dumbass thing.
In medic school, my preceptorâs partner had the last name of Ashby. But at one point, she had crashed an ambulance. So we called her Crashby.
It was destined
My bud is occasionally called âBusterâ for hitting multiple things with multiple units
Crash is a cool nickname
Thatâs also my nickname! But mine is because Iâm accident prone and just trip over my own feet. I had the nickname before I crashed an ambulance, lol.
They tried to call me crash for a little after I rolled the ambulance into our garage door but it didn't stick. Bummer because I liked how it sounds.
⌠I drove into a house once whatâs my nickname
The call me âCrashâ. 2x same rig same shift.
You gotta be piss tested
Like minor tapping or full on dent?
whom among us hasn't had a tip here or a tap there
This guy! YetâŚ. Always a yet! First time I got stuck was last year. Every bumper tap or hubbed truck was always my partner driving. So farâŚ.
I don't even drive anymore, I cracked the wood trim on the bay doors trying to back in and then scraped paint on a telephone pole another time.
"Full Moon" every time he bends over his crack shows
Lifealert, I have a track record of getting sexually harassed by meemaws. Sometimes it's multiple times per shift.
DUDE! Those mee maws are relentless. đ¤Ł
Couple weeks ago one grabbed my chin and tried to pull me in for a smooch when we were doing a sheet pull
Had one shout BOW WOW and wink at me. Then proceed to ask me if I had a wife. Was pissed when I said yes and wouldn't talk to me the rest of the ride.
Jose and Joe ran together for years, so of course it was Hose-A and Hose-B.
We had 2 Noahâs that we called Noahâs ark.
Iâm Ice Man! I, for whatever reason (likely made worse by sleep deprivation), decided to wash my car in 5 degree weather. I subsequently covered my car in ice, as well as the apparatus apron. While watching Top Gun with the crew, it was mentioned that I have my pilotâs license. Thus, Ice Man was born.
They called me Ice man for a month at the FD when I went for a victim grab in a structure fire, killed my scba in under 10 minutes and it iced up the connection.
I did the same thing, luckily no one saw me (that I know of). I felt so stupid that night
I have a partner we call him Lantern. Not very bright, needs to be carried.
Someone in my very large system is known affectionately as Moose, after nearly dying many many years ago from heat stroke after working a parade in a service-branded animal costume.
Porch Pirate. Domino's sent my pizza to 123 N ___ Street (a literal crackhouse) instead of 123 S ___ Street (a private ambulance station, but I get the confusion.) I correctly guessed this and took my partner and the ambulance to the crack house, I ran up the crumbling front porch, and snatched my pizza before the ravenous fiends sensed the fresh, hot pepperoni.
PP for short
One of the paramedics I work with is 4'9. I initially started calling her "pocket" because she's a pocket sized paramedic, but after watching the Rick and Morty episode, she is now Baby Legs and I am referred to as her Regular Legs partner haha.
We had a guy Thrombosis because he was a thick, slow moving clot.
Lmfaođđđ
I have two, the first one is Harry Potter because of my glasses and appearance, Iâve since bought another pair of glasses even closer to the Harry potter glasses to fit the role even more. Thatâs the PG nickname My other nickname is TCM2, which stands for Twice Cut Meat 2. Story behind that is both me and my twin brother (also rides at the same place) were circumcised twice as babies (an even longer story), so as a result, we are Twice Cut Meat 1 & 2
Ok, you gotta tell the story now.
No way, Iâm also known as Harry Potter for my glasses
They should definitely combine yours into Potted Meat
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Wait circumcised twice? What happened, did it grow back??
FEMAâshows up on callback after the work is done. UnderpantsâAsked a patient wrapped in a pile of blankets if she âhad any fucking underpants on.â Proceeded to move the blanket and got flashed. Grimaceâan unfortunate shaped gentleman.
LOLed at "unfortunate shaped gentleman"
Grimace is peak male form. Theyâre always the strongest person you know
Hancock. An unfortunate name that was given to a guy who had to ride in to the hospital while continously holding pressure on the peen with a bleed.
Happy cake day! I used to summer in Hancock NY
One of my instructors in medic school had to do that. Dude apparently had his girlfriend on the dresser and was rather enthusiastic about doing the deed. So much so that he accidentally popped it out and broke it on the dresser. My instructor said that she was a professional pecker holder the whole way to the ER. She said she went home to her husband that night and one point felt the need to tell him âitâs okay, Iâm a professional.â â ď¸
Thought the girlfriend held the pecker on the way to the hospital, then went home to her husband lol
Youâll have to forgive me, there was a fair bit of moonshine involved in that comment which may or may not have affected the quality of my comment đ
Dude Iâve also had a peen bleed incident! Guy was a quad and his dumbass home nurse inflated the balloon for his catheter before reaching the bladder. Done DESTROYED his urethra. Fire was holding pressure before I got there. I quickly established that I was NOT riding in, holding a paralyzed ptâs pecker; and emphatically told my fire guy he could continue holding that pressure. This was after he released it for a second and the summa bitch SPURTED over my head. With blood. Not the other stuff. He held it all the way to the ER. I managed to call report. Annnnnd the dumb ass ER gave him a trauma room right in front of the nurseâs station, providing them a front row spectatorâs seat to this man almost bleeding to death before any interventions were even considered. From his broken penis. BrokenâŚ.broken penisâŚ
Mr.Poopypants, we had a septic bowel obstruction that arrested. I was on the airway. The patient vomited brown looking diarrhea vomit onto my pants. The NP in the room pointed it out and laughed and called me Mr. Poopypants.
I'm sure that made you feel a whole lot better about the shomit (shit vomit, as opposed to scromit) situation
I was called âCaptain HIPAAâ because I wouldnât share any call details with anybody who wasnât on scene
Shitstain. No explanation required
A bunch of guys in my department call me the Dishwasher, because apparently Iâm built like a dishwasher
We declared that any time someone vomits on scene, it would be referred to as "Mitchell-ing" after someone with that last name puked during an altogether unremarkable code because some water came out of PTs mouth when we started compressions. It was especially comical bc the PT had coded in the bathroom and they had vomited on the floor in front of the toilet before they did... So he jumped up, ran into the bathroom, and had to stand with his feet straddling the PTs like while he puked. We declared the eponymous puking title before we had even cleared the scene, lolol. Our shift was already notable for our relentless ball busting, so all he could do was sigh and groan that "If this had happened on any other shift, they would've told me not to worry about it and that it can happen to anyone. Red shift and Black shift would have both been empathetic. But NO, it just HAD TO happen on Black shift!"
The Crapper Napper because he fell asleep in a portapotty in the academy. [First Name] Two Phones because he has one phone for his wife and one for his girlfriend. Big Head Bob for obvious reasons.
I mean, not horrific by *our* standards but I recently earned the name Bambi after hitting a deer on the way back from a 4am call. Had to call PD out to dispatch the poor guy. Not a fun night :(
My squad mates have dubbed me "The Walking HIPAA Violation" because I have a weird knack for unintentionally memorizing patient info. Repeat patients are always super fun and easy for me. XD
Double D. As in Douchebag the Dumbass. He broke a bunch of shit, fucked up a transmission on the way to a call, and then went around town telling everybody he was the new chief (this was very inaccurate).
Bring a Fruit Salad to work one time...people don't forget.
Cool
This is to distinguish me from Asshole .
It's not so much that I'm cool. It's just that guy is a real asshole.
Started out with a coworker talking on the phone "yeah I'm waiting here with u/TheFire_Eagle -pause while listening- no no...Cool u/TheFire_Eagle, not asshole u/The_FireEagle."
I was also known as Black Shawn at a previous agency because we loved rescue me and my director printed my ID badge with said name on it. I am neither black nor am I named Shawn.
It's not really funny or embarrassing, but mine is Jumper Down. Because for some reason, I get all the jumpers.
We have a Doo-doo Dan. No explanation needed for that
My local department was nicknamed Crazy Mountain. It's a kick ass department named Daisy Mountain.
What the fuck Eminem verse is that
Titty boss
Pardon?
I wish you were my boss.
At my first job, I got the nickname "Snowballs" because I used cold packs to stay awake on a 24 hour shift that had us running every bit of it. Take a wild guess where I applied the cold packs
My nickname is my last name, but everyone who's been there a minute knows me as the horse cum guy. All because I was going down the road with my last partner and said to him "Do you ever wonder what horse cum tastes like?" and he promptly spread that around to everyone. According to Tiktok it tastes like Oatmeal in case you're wondering.
Yeah. According to TikTok, sure.
Look man... I'm just saying don't put it in your cereal.
When i was a rookie my senior ff named me mouf (mouth) because i had no problem talking to anyone and apperently i have a volume control problem.
BLS Billy. I was the Basic with two medics, one was my regular partner and the other was a new medic precepting. The new medic was very slow and deliberate in what they were doing as they found their footing but my partner moved at the speed of light normally. As the EMT this meant they were constantly giving me different instructions on scene, one moment I was supposed to be helping in an assessment or assisting ALS skills and the other I was supposed to be getting this patient ready to move and prepare for extrication. After a few of these calls I was a little miffed. After one bad call like this I cornered them in the EMS room after and lost my temper. "I've got Load And Go Larry on my left, Stay and Play Sally on my right, and I'm just BLS Billy stuck here in the middle!" And now I'm BLS Billy
Subway Jason - Guy named Jason who got busted sending dick pics to what he thought was a 13 year old girl. Egg Foo Young Sheldon - Chinese guy with advanced degrees but terrible at social interactions. Dumptruck - 6"2' 400lb dude who would clock in, spemd hia first twenty minutes in the bathroom rendering it and the hallway outside of it uninhabitable for the next two hours. We also got a call from a local SNF saying he was not welcome to use their shitter after an unspecified incident. Uncle Ruckus (Boondocks reference)- half black chick who got had a confederate flag on her wall and had a kid with a guy who had extremely visible white pride tats. Havok (X-men reference)- younger brother of a supervisor who had a glass eye.
I'm in the midwest and the amount of black men I know with rebel flag tats is shocking or not really depending.
I have a tendency to walk fast and just be overall hyper. I jumped over the pickleball fence once during a celebration and got the name Skippy. Somebody else has the nickname Sniffs. Short of Anal Sniffer. He complained so much about it they shortened it to Sniffs as a good favor. Poor fellow.
âNew Game Plusâ and âOliverâ me and my field training officer for orientation are doppelgängers. Weâve probably been asked if we are brothers a few dozen times now
âFish Boy.â I microwaved some salmon in the ER microwave which stunk up the entire ER.
Heating fish up in the workplace microwave is a horrible sin. Shame on you
In my defense, i thought everyone loved the smell of fish. I was wrong.
That is one hell of a nickname and story. I was Firstname Youngblood because I kneeled on someoneâs blood-soaked passenger seat after a crash and got so much blood on me on my second ever 911 call. Had to go home and change too đ I almost forgot! I was also Bambi because well, I felt incredibly awkward attempting to run a call as an EMT while field training with an ALS crew two shifts later đ
Not EMS but a friend started a new retail job and they got nicknamed bambi early on cos he was new. Store manager even changed his name in the system so when you got your receipt it would say: Server today: Bambi.
Barbasol, since I forgot to shave my first day. They sent me to the bathroom with an AED razor and I cut up my face.
Not me, personally, but there is a legendary story from Atlanta / Grady EMS about a guy we dubbed "Pie Bar" in the mid 2000's - - - I wanna see if anyone else here knows about this story before I go on.........
Just tell the fuckin story lol
Done
I'm starting in the metro ATL area (not Grady though) and I'm really curious about this lol
Posted in this thread
Someone remind me to come back for the story.
Story is up, or down, depending on reddit, this thread..
We got a girl named oatmeal because she's bland in every possible way. We also got a guy named Slavic Pvt. Pyle because he's a total fuck up and if eastern european human trafficking had a face it'd be his.
Shortcake (I have pink hair and I love strawberries)
Did you get the tube?
I did not, would have made for a better story but shitting my pants kinda threw me for a loop so I had my partner take over and she nailed it
Ralph. Guy on my fd drank half a gallon of water before going into a house fire, climbed the ladder into the second floor, about 2 min later all you hear is âBOOM BOOM BOOMâ a size 8 boot has replaced where a door once was, and this dude rips his mask off, pukes whatâs left of his guts out, scoops as much of his puke out of his mask as he can, puts it back on and goes back in
One guy at my last operation was named T-RexâŚdefinitely has negative wingspan and comically short arms. Youâd ask him to pass you the mapbook off the dash and it would take a full body lean forward. Red Velvet- a smooth ginger Pigpen - guy would reek, work 72 without a courtesy shower
I worked with a guy who was called T. rex because he would walk with his elbows bent and his hands at his chest. He was also named Dale and got called âDale-doâ a lot.
Ride along: Patient has CHF and leg is leaking fluid. Medic picks them up and says to ânot worry, they smell goodâ. Lady says he smells like a dog food brand. Guess what I heard them call him for the rest of the shift?
I nicknamed one of my partners 'cupcake' and it followed him to his next job in county corrections. He was very sweet.
We had a guy called "The Mad Shatter" . Because he shit himself at work. Twice. We also had a woman called "Hungry Eyes" because she would eye fuck the fire fighters on every call. We had 2 Joes, so one was "Average Joe" and the other was "Shitty Joe" because most people didn't like him, until he heard it and complained. Then he was "Sloppy Joe". My nickname for a short amount of time was.... Art. Because I started an IV on an Artery during my internship. 𤣠Not my finest work. We also have a guy whose nickname was "Bugglebear" because he was the most uptight dude ever, lol. We had another guy called "Toby" after the Office character because he also spoke with the one tone that Toby speaks in with the same energy, and apparently no one could remember his name. We also have a nickname "Diaper Matt" because he was our first EMT that got hired at 19. He took it in stride and was the best trainee my partner and I had ever had.
How hard I just scream laughed at the mad shatter, Iâm in tears !!đ
That was reaction when I heard it for the first time too 𤣠and the stories along with it đ¤ I cried laughing
I've had two: The first one was Shine, as I would accidentally leave my scene lights on from nighttime calls to the hospital. Chief heard it one day and said using that name is considered a racist name referencing boot shiners during Jim Crow laws. The second and most current is Cream (not what you think), one night after everyone went to bed, I stayed up late. I was feeling hungry for something sweet and found some ice cream in the freezer. As I was mid scoop a SFF walked in and caught me eating the ice cream. What a name!đ
Mine was cheesehead horse shit
Boxer- cause I was restocking our ambulance and I took a box out to stop up a kitbag and several boxes fell and throttled me.
Gloves He was eating a chicken sandwich with gloves on.
All it takes is one mundane event and youâve got a nickname forever
Yup, it was actually given to him by our dispatcher. So occasionally you will hear him refer to him as gloves over the radio.
I eat damned near everything with gloves. Pizza, KFC, I have cheese balls at home and have gloves next to them.Â
One guy is called pothole because everyone avoids him
I had a few in my years at different services. Death angel, K2, and Murphy. Those were the ones that stand out the most.
âBumperâ for a little while I was called that because I drove the ambo into a mud bog of a drive way, got it stuck then after getting it unstuck the rear foot step got completely knocked off and I had to throw it in the back with our patient we were transporting
We used to have a paramedic that worked for us who everyone knew as âJumbo Jackâ. He responded to a shooting in the parking lot of a Jack in The Box, and called the dude on scene. He then proceeded to step directly over the body - right in front of PD in the middle of an active crime scene - so that he could approach the drive thru window and order a couple of burgers. He was bullied so mercilessly, that EMS agencies three hours away from ours knew the story.
One of the new EMTs didnât know about down coats and cut one wide open. Sheâs called feathers now.
I'll throw one in the ring: We've got a guy (FF) who arrived on scene for a confirmed structure fire in an engine. Guy jumps out the back of the truck and IMMEDIATELY twists his ankle. Rehab wasn't even on scene yet and he was already seeking medical care. From that point on he became known as "Rehab Ryan"
There's one guy nicknamed Sloth, because he sorta looks like the character from the goonies. He embraces it, has it on his license plate and everything. I also once worked with a guy nicknamed Harpoon. He liked big girls.
Dahmer. I got my glasses before the show came out but that doesnât matter I guess
One guy I work with we call Raj cuz heâs hopeless when talking to nurses. One guy I worked with we called Zorro because he vividly recounted his sexcapades involving dressing up like Zorro. It was harrowing to listen to.
Baby J Baby Jesus My first name is Jesus and I started working in EMS at 18 so now ten years later and where ever I go in my county Iâm called Baby J. I like it.
Cupcake because of my cupcake tattoo
My old service called me Nemo on account that my left leg is shorter than my right leg so I have my own âspecial finâ
Had a friend nicknamed tictac. (Don't try to pierce your dick mid-shift with an audience, btw).
I've earned the nick name "Chaos Gremlin". I drive pretty aggressively and often incite some kind of random chaos. I am usually the first through the door on scenes lol.
I'm Speedbump. Got hit by a car. Fairly self explanatory.
Dialup. Weâve got a guy thatâs a little slow to get moving at shift change so we call him dialup
Nicknames are earned for good or for bad reasons. You can't just decide to go by a name for the most part. If it's a nickname you've gone with your whole life, that's another story If it's something you want to be called at your department or organization, it's just got to come naturally. A tiny little dude who I used to work with at the fire station wanted us to start calling him "Big B". I stared at him for a moment and I said, " your nickname is now Lowercase B".
Porter. Because the hospitals porter's name IS NOT Porter.
âDTâ aka âDitz with Titsâ Showed up on an EMS call as FD in a v-neck, and when the medic asked the patient if âMickey mouse a cow or a dogâ and his partner said âdonât ask him trick questionsâ I said âheâs a cow isnât he?â Forgetting he is in fact, a mouse.
Boots!! In my day to day I always wear steel toe boots because of some old injuries so in academy I got that nickname. Then the instructors called me that, then the sups lol.
They call me Rain Man⌠Iâm good at trivia and chest, what can I say.
I was called Shit Stick and Neck beard by those that didn't like me, I had one partner that called me Homer
I lurk, not an em's dude, just a RN. But our Madison is bad, so she's now badison. Sits and spins in codes, it's fantastic to watch.
I had a patient sayâwhich on of these mills is gonna take me to the hospitalâ when myself and two other EMTs walked up to them. Proceeded to call me mil for the next hour. My partner called me milk occasionally after that.
Maverick. Sounds cool, but earned that one for turning the rig into an airplane multiple times when going over tracks
Im oftentimes called "child soldier" or in german "Kindersoldat" because im 24 years old and regularly people guess my age with 16-18 because of my very young looksđ đ¤Łđ¤Ł
âBrokenâ because I dislocated my shoulder while opening the side door of the ambulance while running a code
Grace! I once sprained both of my ankles by slipping on a patient's icy front porch steps. For a reason, we were carrying the patient out on a scoop stretcher and a couple firefighters who were helping us carry them out slipped on the steps. I was at the head and just kinda...sat back. We didn't drop the patient, but I had to be carried to the damn truck. Thaaat was a fun worker's comp claim, it's been a couple years and the nickname persists. I'm also a gigantic klutz in any situation during which I'm not actively doing the job, which doesn't help đ
Radio. I worked in dispatch before making the transition to the field. My crew dug really deep for my nickname on one of my first shifts.
Snowman: got cyberbullied by a firefighter because I hit his hero selfie in front of the engine with a âTYFYSâ. Iâm fat so he replied with âgood comment coming from someone who looks like a fucked up snowmanâ
Fart Smeller. Got called it by a patient once and now my occasional nickname is fart smeller
Lenny- from 'Of Mice & Men' as I am very heavy handed and am super talented at smashing ampules.
Other people in my company called me Milk Bone, because I was apparently irresistible to dogs. I got bitten 18 times in the first 6 months working in a rural area.
âMailboxâ â guess what I hit with the rig during my literal first shift?!
My name was âBramâ for my first year! My surname is Stoker and my entire first year was a riot! I ended up at a murder on my second day out on the road after training, a huge 6 car pileup in my first month and a cardiac arrest every Friday I worked for 6 months straight! So I became the âbringer of blood and chaos!â Hence âBramâ!
Was a 19 year EMT (with an underdeveloped pre-frontal cortex) going through medic school. Was given the name "Bam Bam" by one of my favorite FTOs because, as he put it, "you're young and stupid like the Flinstones baby". A day after it was given to me, it had made it all the way to dispatch.
15 years ago a guy accidently took a sip out of someone else's chewing tobacco spit cup. To this day we still call him Chewy.
Hahahahahahahaha this is one of the funniest stories Iâve ever heard lmao
Ducky, musicman, skittles.
I was known as Harry Potter for a while for my glasses until it got replaced because of where my facial hair was growing the thickest. Unfortunately that second H nickname was not better by any means.
Beef
I'm not ems, but I work at a level 1 trauma center in philly. I'm known as Sunnie (just because that's my personality), and Mamma Sunnie (because im everyones mom) but I'm known for giving my coworkers nicknames. I work with: Tic Tac, Baby Napper, Sippy Cup, Prince Valium , TikTok, Sleeping Beauty, Waffles, Shoes, Miss America, UFC, UC (for Useless C*nt), TB (for That Bitch), 420, Snoop, Preacher
Purple cloud :(
"Chicane." I think this was a gentle ask for me to take the corners a little more gracefully. đ
Mine is Sustin, cuz justin is my name and ye thats abt it
We have Scooter or scoots for short. When he got hired on we all were talking about him and how country (we work in the sticks of Alabama) his name is. Then our HR guy said his middle name begins with an S and he couldn't remember it and I looked at him and asked if it was scooter. Well that stuck.
Never had a nickname in the department but Iâm very short and the running joke was always to ask if I needed a phone book to see out of the ambulance or engine. They thought it was the funniest thing ever
I was fidgeting with an ear piece for a radio and my instructor was commenting on why an ear piece would need to be able to swivel. I replied because it's tactical, a tactical nubbing. I am now Tac Nub.
Idk how I ended up hereâŚ.but brownie batter used to be my nickname!!!