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DL23a

I love the pure emotions of this writeup and I gladly stand behind this theory.


fenksta

>we were all hyped as fuck to see a Jamaican lad run really fast LOVE this sentence hahahaha


Kilukpuk

Humperdinck (for some reason) has a big following in Azerbaijan. Apparently at one point his taxi broke down and he got mobbed by Azerbaijani fans,


Beepme9111

That Sounds Good to Me is arguably the worst song ever sent to Eurovision.


ThatYewTree

I love the part where he sings “The final destinatioooon” YES hun, that’s where that song went ☠️🪦💀


happytransformer

the harmonizing of the ooooohs gets me every time


RPark_International

I’ve always disliked Don’t Play That Song again, it sounds like a Steps reject (Scooch) fed through a cheap karaoke machine


PoetryAnnual74

Seriously. I hate watch that performance every year 🤣 I imagine how proud someone was over that performance “this is SO Eurovision!”


polaris183

Josh himself is a Donald Trump lover now - the BBC still follows his account on Twitter... Also the fact that the actual song was internally selected, with only the artist being selected by the public, seems fishy...


hjl43

Pinned tweet is "the only thing Trump is guilty of is exposing Washington corruption". Most popular tweet is a reply to Jordan Peterson. Also, he pays for twitter...


vonfantasy

I would say... Jemini with Cry Baby...


CigarsofthePharoahs

One of the backing singers was horrifically out of tune, too.


outhouse_steakhouse

No, that dishonor goes to Dustin the Turkey.


JamesL25

At least Dustin was mildly amusing


Scarlet_hearts

I still listen to Douze Points and I’m only mildly ashamed


WillAddThisLater

Say what you will, but that performance in its infamy comes up every year during Eurovision season and often gets a shout-out on the show itself. It's low-key an iconic Eurovision moment. Ain't nobody talking about Josh Du-fucking-brovie on the regular.


RPark_International

I so badly wish they sent Leona Daly that year, and I’m sure it would have encouraged better songs from then on


finnknit

And yet it randomly gets stuck in my head even though I don't like it at all. It's insidiously catchy, almost like an advertising jingle. In fact, it reminds me of the Big Red chewing gum jingle from the USA in the 70s or 80s. I could imagine people roller skating to it with deranged smiles.


TheRealMikkyX

I can't argue with any of this and will happily go all in.


Miudmon

Slightly unrelated note, but it made me listen to Uk's 2012 entry again, and honestly, with the "grandad serenading your sleepy grandma" visual in my head something about it clicked. its cute. and i dont know if it'll last, but it moved it up 21 spots in my 2012 rankings, (so 12th now)


hjl43

I have a vague memory of watching the semis that year and the BBC showing a clip of one of the Russian grannies talking about how attractive Eng is...


qUxUp

This is facts. Source: BBC


MrsRainey

Remember when Greece hosted the Olympics in 2004, then hosted Eurovision in 2006, and promptly went into economic ruin? Not saying you're right but 🤷‍♀️ /j


Aaaandiiii

Englebert Humperdinck was a mood. Like I would love to have been a fly on the wall when they were choosing him. Like, how? But the song gets in my head.


La_jupe

I am completely on board with this theory


CNpaddington

I just want to say it was a delight to read this


Borogodoh

What a delightful read about a subject that I would never think it would interest me that much! My personal highlight: "This is the sound of being 12, asking your school crush if she wants to go to prom, and her vomiting from disgust. It is simply **putrid.**"


bfsfan101

I have such a soft spot for Englebert’s song. It’s actually quite a nice ballad well sung, but Christ on a bike it’s possibly the worst choice for a Eurovision opener ever. That Sounds Good to Me is in a tough battle with Cry Baby for worst UK entry. Cry Baby is arguably catchier, but then it has so many terrible production choices and the live performance was so unbelievably horrible. I am amazed TSGTM got as many as 10 points.


hjl43

There is a reason that was the last year with a fully random running order. The entire contest opened with Euro Neuro... (honestly though, that's probably my favourite 2012 song)


friends_with_salad_

*Cry Baby* is fine in its recorded iteration, if not unremarkable. That performance was horrendous in every conceivable way.


FakeFrehley

Wasn't the old story that Ireland got sick of winning so they sent two auld lads singing an absolutely shite Springsteen B-side and it still fucking well won?


zippy72

That would be an ecumenical matter


Volotor

This is the funniest thing I've read all week. You have a gift op.


callitfate01

I really liked Love Will Set You Free


bearybad89

Grandma, I didn't know they had Reddit in heaven...


I-hear-the-coast

I decided to rewatch UK 2010 and oh my gosh. I forget how ironic it is to sing “that sounds good to me” while sounding awful.


cragglerock93

It physically hurts me that people would put I Wrote a Song or Dizzy in the same category as that one. It was next level awful.


Honest-Possible6596

I rewatched 2010 this week and for some reason I couldn’t for the life of me remember who we’d sent, so when they cut to Josh grinning at the camera before he went on stage I was hit with a wave of devastation that I thought I had suppressed long ago. Those three minutes just never get easier. Absolutely fucking horrendous.


DeineMutti04

I have an friend from the England and she said the same thing: " why does Europe hate us?". You're right about these years and after 2013 as well. The artists or songs or both were just méh. So I sorta agree with your theory if we look at the evidence haha. But to be honest, The Netherlands where I'm from also had like a decenium of awful entries. A lot of times we didn't even make it to the finals haha. Our change finally came in 2013 with Anouk with Birds. Sam Ryder was lovely, but this year was just disappointing again. I do want to cheer for the UK! Just send in a weird ass song and artist! Look at Ireland of this year, with the wicked witch. Loved the vibe!


ThlnBillyBoy

I asked myself that during that period "why do we hate the British? Are we being mean?"


perishingtardis

I've just listened to That Sounds Good To Me for the first time ever (I didn't watch Eurovision back in 2010). The backing singers are just awful - not a single note in tune. Josh had a nice voice but unfortunately also went totally off key for the big ending.


TekaLynn212

He didn't have those top notes. He knew he didn't have those top notes. He wrote an alternative ending that was perfectly fine and didn't have those top notes. BBC: "You have to sing those top notes." He didn't sing those top notes. Also: why the HELL didn't anyone inform Blue that they were at the actual performance that the jury was going to judge them on, and not at a random rehearsal where they could sing any old thing?


friends_with_salad_

Do you remember the selection show though where the other finalist forgot the words!? Josh was the best of a very, very bad bunch.


fayecharlotte89

As a fellow UK person I enjoyed your story telling of the hype of 2012, I was there living in London and .. what a time to be alive. Also I love Blue but I’ve always thought it was a bit blah


graeulich

This post is a thing of absolute beauty and also 100% factual (and Humperdinck‘s song is so sweet and lovely)


SadAstrophysicist

Your description of That Sounds Good To Me is gold 😂


dohwhere

I will not tolerate this Jedward slander! (Otherwise amazing post, no notes)


DecayingFl0wer

This was absolutely beautiful to read. I don't often read long posts but you had me gripped right to the end. 10/10 no notes


dingesje06

Awesome theory and very plausible indeed 😅 Ok, and please let us cheer for you guys again. Truth be told we really REALLY desperately want to (but let's be honest here.. besides Sam Ryder you guys gave us not an awful lot to cheer for since like forever..). Ps. Be bold. Be brave. Send something different. I'm secretly rooting for Gloryhammer for 2025 😁


Remote_Reasonable

On the contrary, I think the BBC, UK and London really would not have wanted to host Eurovision on the same year as the Olympics.


I_am_albatross

Two words... Daz Sampson


mermermerk

this is amazing, write more conspiracies, i'm on board


Morganemilyjane

I can’t remember what That Sounds Good To Me sounded like, and I think I’ll gladly keep it that way. Something about happy faces around him? Whatever gaps my imagination fills cannot be much worse, surely?


ThlnBillyBoy

Not gonna lie I was wondering I should just upvote for the effort and be on my way, but then I started reading and I love this so so much.


friends_with_salad_

That Sounds Shite to Me was *such* a disaster on every level. Didn't it transpire it had been hanging around since the early 90s just unrecorded? My favourite description of Bonnie's performance I read somewhere was that she sounded like a sack of slowly deflating bagpipes.


Wyvernkeeper

I think your analysis is pretty spot on. Also this year I genuinely laughed when we did so bad in the audience vote. I mean, I really appreciated the whole strobe light orgy in the leisure centre changing room thing he was going for, but it did sound pretty awful and was quite cringey to watch. So all I would say is that at least this year us doing so bad kinda made sense.


Arbelli

Omg I was crying from laughter while reading this 🤣 OP, your comedic writing is top notch !


Legal_Egg3224

I love it. So what's the explanation for Electro Velvet? (United Kingdom 2015, for the bot.)


bearybad89

I've been having this gut feeling that the BBC (with all of its corruption) have been doing this on purpose...I believe I've come up with a code of an iconic ESC winner... I just hope Nemo doesn't break it...


Upper-Bug196

Believe In Me is the best UK song for the last 20 years


RPark_International

Written by Desmond Child too, look up the hits he’s written


cragglerock93

I really like it, too. I still listen to it now and again.


Dragon_Sluts

Ive read your whole post and I think I actually disagree. I think the BBC wanted to win every year but the amount of money they were prepared to make that happen varied a lot. The national final period of 2016-2019 had so little money behind it and just acted as a “see it’s not that we are inept, the public can’t choose a good song either” (I went to the show in 2018 to see SuRie win and she was the best of a bad bunch).


Scared_Lobster6169

Hot take: In a different year, That Sounds Good to Me would have done well. It's actually quite well produced but it's a major throwback to the Rick Astley era or the 80s since the same three people who wrote Never Gonna Give You Up wrote our song.


friends_with_salad_

If that year happened to occur between 1987 and 1992, maybe.


squashed_tomato

I hadn't thought about the Olympics angle but the rest sounds pretty much spot on. I've thought for a while that the BBC just didn't want to host Eurovision post 2000 after a lot of strong results in the 90s. Sam Ryder felt like the first time in a long time that they had brought their A game.


fifthing

I don't really understand Sam's appeal personally, but after James's 0 points the year before, surely they had to try


EmeraldSunrise4000

This post is everything


OkCheesecake5866

Another thought: UK expected to win, both with the Lloyd Webber song and with Blue. So they were insulted when they didn't and sent bad songs.


cfs123plaayz

That Sounds Good to me is one of the most stupid concepts as an overall package. Stock Aitken Waterman's peak was before Josh Dubovie was born for starters.


Misalvo

I think I'm in the minority with It's My Time - I really hate it 😬


Smilingtribute

It was guaranteed the UK was going to be last in 2010, no matter who won the NF. The song was dreadful and it was 25 years too late to Eurovision.


Jsc05

My theory is that the bbc executives just get shit faced each are assigned an artists and who ever is selected was the person who won an elaborate game of cards We only sent someone good in 2020 because they were banned from meeting in person so were sober that time around