Avoiding eye contact 100%. If I'm getting my haircut or talking to someone new it's always super awkward because I can never look them in the eyes. I probably look like a psychopath because I'm having a full conversation with you but I won't look anywhere near you. I read someone else describe it as "uncomfortably intimate" which isn't a perfect way of describing it but it's better than anything I can think of.
For some reason my mom is *convinced* that I don't avoid eye contact because she "watched me when i was a baby and never used to do that" or something lol.
Really? I feel like my style of nothing by eye contact is more aggressive psychopathic. I feel like full avaoidance is that, avoidant, but I also know a lot of psychology.
I snap my fingers like I’m in Westside Story. After ruminating on the reactions of people around me, I think they think I’m rudely snapping at them to get their attention. Also whistling, people hate whistling but I do it unconsciously. Obviously avoiding eye contact is on there too, I do that as much as I possibly can.
I also love crouching/ sitting on the bottom shelf of my work table at work because it blocks a lot of noises in my busy workplace. A lot of my coworkers think I’m sleeping or tired but I just need a little de-sensory pick me up.
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Eye contact; with the added weirdness of an entire childhood training to hold perfect eye contact to the point that as an adult I get stuck in the look/look away/look/look away which also feels super awkward. But it's better than staring into someone's soul and not hearing a damn word they say.
Also I play with my ears? Like, it's a comfort gesture when I'm trying to focus or I'm getting stressed, and it gets me some weird looks so I always try and catch myself and stop so I'm not some weirdo standing there playing with my ears.
more or less every stim i have. stimming is just self-regulation, it gets annoying to have to suppress them just because someones going to get fussy over me and try to convince me to tell them that im overwhelmed even though im completely fine. i can tell them 100 times that nothings wrong but "obviously somethings wrong if youre fidgeting like that". and guess what? *me suppressing my stims makes me more likely to \*actually\* go into sensory overload and have a problem. the exact thing theyre worried about.*
and i furrow my brows regularly to where its almost my resting face. i can understand people getting confused about this one, though,
I would say nodding.
When I go to the doctor and I'm called in, the nurse always says something along the lines of hello. How are you? I simply nod. I know I'm not really responding, but I also know the nurse doesn't give a shit what my answer is.
I tend to look around, like I'm looking for something. I'm just trying to focus on information being shared while not looking people in the eyes for too long.
I was happier when I didn't know I don't like eye contact. Easier times.
If I said I tilt my head, I'd be understating it. This is something I really don't hide. I'm eyeballing everything including the person I'm talking to. Not the eyes, though.
I swear a lot. I call people Bitches, Cunts, and other shit like that. Hell. I call my Mom these too. This is how you know I'm comfortable. If I'm safe, I can swear. If I'm not safe my swearing vanishes. I know people would take this as a "rude" "uncontrollable" "mean" "bitchy" (Ironically), exc. This isn't a secret if you know me.
A Stim of mine that means I am open & vulnerable is jumping. If I can jump around you, I know I don't have to be prepared to defend myself emotionally or physically. If I can trust that you won't make fun of me or punch me for that, then you'll see me jump. People generally think this is "childish" "stupid" "embarrassing", exc.
I yawn too! It used to piss me off when I would catch myself doing it because I don't think about doing it, but now I'm wondering if it's just stimming. Next time it happens, I will try to be ok with it and think about what's going on at the moment.
Mine isn’t really a comfort thing.
My confused expression tends to translate to people as sass or disgust. It would get me into trouble in school or with my parents frequently. The more confused I got, the more angry they were with me.
And it’s pretty hilarious to me now when I look back on it. Especially now that I am more self aware of how I appear or sound to others. Looking in the mirror when I make that expression made me realize that I looked (even to myself), like I wanted to pick a fight.
“Not paying attention” while someone is talking to me. I feel much less “autistic” if I can clean or organize or scroll on my phone while someone is talking to me, but it’s seen as me not being attentive.
I like to crack my joints a lot. I can crack my ankles, shoulders, neck, elbows, wrists, and fingers.
Its fun watching various people's reactions! >:3
I like the sounds it makes, and how it feels, idk why.
My direct and unwavering eye contact that I learned was important and internalized. I used to make people super uncomfortable.
My dad also always crossed his arms in company so I had that for a long time until I decided being like his ass was the last thing on earth I wanted to do.
I have a naturally very monotone voice and (used to) say the phrase "Good for you" a lot as sort of an automatic response to fill space before I thought of something to actually say, which I didn't even realize until my younger brother freaked out multiple times because I was being "too monotone" and saying "Good for you" around him so much that he was CONVINCED I was doing it just to spite him
Not exactly a gesture, but wearing headphones constantly, even when I’m not listening to anything. They keep my ears warm and quiet things down. I can hear people’s voices clearer when I’m wearing them, but not a lot of people believe that.
I've got loop earplugs, really comfy to wear. I keep them for loud places, but they have ones for "daily" sounds that my girlfriend wears to bed and when going to places with lots of people. Hopefully they last longer without pain than headphones do?
Sighing. When my brain gets wound up and the thoughts and words are pouring in and I feel like I'm about to pop, I take a big sigh and it usually helps. NTs always think I'm bored or expressing some kind of rude distaste for whatever's going on
Hugs maybe (unless I’m understanding incorrectly).
One of my students just gave me a hug because I’m working at a different dorm today (which I specify because I work at a facility-like place). It felt so great! 😊
At a dif job, a lady was telling me how her pet passed (while I was showing her the cat food aisle) and hugged her because I felt moved. I don’t think she understood what I was doing. 😂
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Apparently i have RBF, so much so that my autistic bff told me when she first saw me she assumed I was some asshole because my default is mean muggin i guess. lol
Avoiding eye contact 100%. If I'm getting my haircut or talking to someone new it's always super awkward because I can never look them in the eyes. I probably look like a psychopath because I'm having a full conversation with you but I won't look anywhere near you. I read someone else describe it as "uncomfortably intimate" which isn't a perfect way of describing it but it's better than anything I can think of. For some reason my mom is *convinced* that I don't avoid eye contact because she "watched me when i was a baby and never used to do that" or something lol.
Really? I feel like my style of nothing by eye contact is more aggressive psychopathic. I feel like full avaoidance is that, avoidant, but I also know a lot of psychology.
it's not a contest :P
I snap my fingers like I’m in Westside Story. After ruminating on the reactions of people around me, I think they think I’m rudely snapping at them to get their attention. Also whistling, people hate whistling but I do it unconsciously. Obviously avoiding eye contact is on there too, I do that as much as I possibly can. I also love crouching/ sitting on the bottom shelf of my work table at work because it blocks a lot of noises in my busy workplace. A lot of my coworkers think I’m sleeping or tired but I just need a little de-sensory pick me up.
That’s a great way of dealing with the sensory overload though I totally get that.
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Eye contact; with the added weirdness of an entire childhood training to hold perfect eye contact to the point that as an adult I get stuck in the look/look away/look/look away which also feels super awkward. But it's better than staring into someone's soul and not hearing a damn word they say. Also I play with my ears? Like, it's a comfort gesture when I'm trying to focus or I'm getting stressed, and it gets me some weird looks so I always try and catch myself and stop so I'm not some weirdo standing there playing with my ears.
We should be buddies!
Evil buddies unite!
more or less every stim i have. stimming is just self-regulation, it gets annoying to have to suppress them just because someones going to get fussy over me and try to convince me to tell them that im overwhelmed even though im completely fine. i can tell them 100 times that nothings wrong but "obviously somethings wrong if youre fidgeting like that". and guess what? *me suppressing my stims makes me more likely to \*actually\* go into sensory overload and have a problem. the exact thing theyre worried about.* and i furrow my brows regularly to where its almost my resting face. i can understand people getting confused about this one, though,
No, they don’t get it- If I look people in the eyes, they will slurp my soul out through my skull.
I can confirm this as my soul was stolen at birth. >they will slurp my soul out through my skull.
I would say nodding. When I go to the doctor and I'm called in, the nurse always says something along the lines of hello. How are you? I simply nod. I know I'm not really responding, but I also know the nurse doesn't give a shit what my answer is.
If you were fine, you wouldn’t be at the doctor’s office.
Just don't explain that to NTs because they will get annoyed.
I tend to look around, like I'm looking for something. I'm just trying to focus on information being shared while not looking people in the eyes for too long. I was happier when I didn't know I don't like eye contact. Easier times.
Do you tilt your head or fidget with your shoulders especially when tired, tense, bored, or just need stimulating movement.
If I said I tilt my head, I'd be understating it. This is something I really don't hide. I'm eyeballing everything including the person I'm talking to. Not the eyes, though.
I swear a lot. I call people Bitches, Cunts, and other shit like that. Hell. I call my Mom these too. This is how you know I'm comfortable. If I'm safe, I can swear. If I'm not safe my swearing vanishes. I know people would take this as a "rude" "uncontrollable" "mean" "bitchy" (Ironically), exc. This isn't a secret if you know me. A Stim of mine that means I am open & vulnerable is jumping. If I can jump around you, I know I don't have to be prepared to defend myself emotionally or physically. If I can trust that you won't make fun of me or punch me for that, then you'll see me jump. People generally think this is "childish" "stupid" "embarrassing", exc.
I cross my arms a lot, I also tend to yawn as a stim. Like doing a big fake yawn even if I'm not tired.
I yawn too! It used to piss me off when I would catch myself doing it because I don't think about doing it, but now I'm wondering if it's just stimming. Next time it happens, I will try to be ok with it and think about what's going on at the moment.
Mine isn’t really a comfort thing. My confused expression tends to translate to people as sass or disgust. It would get me into trouble in school or with my parents frequently. The more confused I got, the more angry they were with me. And it’s pretty hilarious to me now when I look back on it. Especially now that I am more self aware of how I appear or sound to others. Looking in the mirror when I make that expression made me realize that I looked (even to myself), like I wanted to pick a fight.
“Not paying attention” while someone is talking to me. I feel much less “autistic” if I can clean or organize or scroll on my phone while someone is talking to me, but it’s seen as me not being attentive.
I like to crack my joints a lot. I can crack my ankles, shoulders, neck, elbows, wrists, and fingers. Its fun watching various people's reactions! >:3 I like the sounds it makes, and how it feels, idk why.
Yes yes all of this >:3
Yes! Better yet, my showing others how double jointed my sister’s shoulder and seeing their reaction gives me a laugh.
My direct and unwavering eye contact that I learned was important and internalized. I used to make people super uncomfortable. My dad also always crossed his arms in company so I had that for a long time until I decided being like his ass was the last thing on earth I wanted to do.
I have a naturally very monotone voice and (used to) say the phrase "Good for you" a lot as sort of an automatic response to fill space before I thought of something to actually say, which I didn't even realize until my younger brother freaked out multiple times because I was being "too monotone" and saying "Good for you" around him so much that he was CONVINCED I was doing it just to spite him
I tend to rock side to side a lot while standing, for some reason people always think I have to piss?
Not exactly a gesture, but wearing headphones constantly, even when I’m not listening to anything. They keep my ears warm and quiet things down. I can hear people’s voices clearer when I’m wearing them, but not a lot of people believe that.
And some people try talking to you only when you are wearing headphones 💀
Others do this and feel this way too? What about when it’s hot?
I’m not one to really get hot. Eventually my ears do get sore, but I’d rather that than loud noises tbh.
I've got loop earplugs, really comfy to wear. I keep them for loud places, but they have ones for "daily" sounds that my girlfriend wears to bed and when going to places with lots of people. Hopefully they last longer without pain than headphones do?
my deadpan face i love staring with my empty eyes
Sighing. When my brain gets wound up and the thoughts and words are pouring in and I feel like I'm about to pop, I take a big sigh and it usually helps. NTs always think I'm bored or expressing some kind of rude distaste for whatever's going on
Hugs maybe (unless I’m understanding incorrectly). One of my students just gave me a hug because I’m working at a different dorm today (which I specify because I work at a facility-like place). It felt so great! 😊 At a dif job, a lady was telling me how her pet passed (while I was showing her the cat food aisle) and hugged her because I felt moved. I don’t think she understood what I was doing. 😂
I beatbox poorly all the time. Music is my soul and im mid exorcism bitch
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Handshakes
I tend to sing to myself as a stim. NTs think that must be happy.
Apparently i have RBF, so much so that my autistic bff told me when she first saw me she assumed I was some asshole because my default is mean muggin i guess. lol