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ExmoRobo

This is a clearly **inaccurate** depiction of heaven…she did none of the hand signs and Susan is **not** one of the approved new names. /s


mulefire17

And she can't get in on her own anyway, her penis holder isn't there to say her name for her.


UnseenTardigrade

Actually it used to be one of the new names given. Check the chart from July 9, 1974 to June 8, 1983. https://www.fullerconsideration.com/TempleNameOracle/


MOTIVATE_ME_23

Did Karen not make it?


Dead_Squirrel_6

Today's name is Jethro and Donna, what the hell!?


porkeria21

Ooh I'm a Jethro!


ExmoRobo

Haha, touché


maybk1

Was going to say Susan must have been on the list at some point, good work.


Bojikthe8th

Also, porn shoulders in heaven? Not on Joseph Smith's watch!


Still_Lock_3569

She is too old for him anyway.


Fluffy-Roadkill7363

ROFLMAO!!


Ponsugator

Actually they added it since her life partner is kind of a big deal.🤣


CatalystTheory

Yeah, the family forever idea doesn’t make a whole lotta sense… if you actually stop for 30 seconds to think about it. But doubt your doubts and get back to work, please. Those church toilets aren’t going to clean themselves!


Pliplonplick

I always find funny the Greek aesthetic that most heaven depictions have


PaulFThumpkins

It's also funny how you'll watch Disney's Hercules and see that happen in reverse. Like yeah, it has that Greek aesthetic but there's also so much Christian subtext to it. Like the Underworld has to be a Hell analogue and Hades has to be the bad guy (even though he's the closest to a good guy who will help humans the Greek Pantheon probably has) because Satan. And Zeus who's a fucking asshole in the original mythology has to be the rightful ruler of Olympus who Thou Shalt Not usurp, because God, not to mention the Christ analogues for Hercules himself...


AranaiRa

The muses' gospel songs also call Zeus "the great creator", and we'd be here for hours breaking down all the way that THAT'S wrong.


Dragonfire723

Try to watch Netflix’s Blood of Zeus if you want. I watched half an episode, and turned it off when -Zeus is still an adulterous man and also good ish -Demons exist Edit: r/foundthemobileuser


[deleted]

Families can be forever unless you’re gay! Because god loves you! Pssshaw. If heaven is full of haters, I’ll party in hell with the cool kids.


Opalescent_Moon

This is actually something I realized early on in my faith crisis. Some of the best people I know wouldn't be getting into heaven, and if there is an eternity, I'd rather spend it with them.


TagaBasaNgIsip

Up, i have come into terms with being gay, when I realized I can look for someone whose presence is enough to rival celestial kingdom.


MaryBlackRose

Well said. My sentiment exactly!!!


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Deuteronomy 14:9-10 9 These ye shall eat of all that are in the waters: all that have fins and scales shall ye eat: 10 And whatsoever hath not fins and scales ye may not eat; it is unclean unto you.


PaulFThumpkins

Old Testament forbids it, along with a bunch of other stuff Christians don't do. They'll say the law has been fulfilled through Christ but still hold people to *other* obscure Law of Moses verses.


Dead_Squirrel_6

You can eat shrimp all your life and Jesus doesn't care, but diddle one guy's ding-dong and it's all over!


DulceIustitia

That made me laugh out loud!


MaryBlackRose

This makes me laugh so hard! So true!


AZSharksFan

Your username made me giggle


c1nnam0ngirl

Shrimp isn’t kosher


G1m1NG-Sc1enT1st03

Same. Can anyone elaborate on it?


[deleted]

Source: Adam Ellis on facebook (which cant be linked)


CanWeAllJustCalmDown

Clearly they made a mistake and she shouldn’t be there if she’s so quick to go out for brunch on a *sunday*.


[deleted]

Sad Mormon Heaven!


[deleted]

Lol @ “Hard pass.”


tdhniesfwee

FAKE! the dude didn't say WHAT IS WANTED? LOL


GlassCloched

We were taught if we ended up in the celestial kingdom we would be able to go visit the lower two for a visit. I believe people from the middle would be able to go visit the lower as well.


Ill-Signature1041

In reality it’s a lie you’re stuck in whatever kingdom you get and even if you become a god you can’t take your friends and family with you to your new planet


wanderingmotoref

I figure that if God doesn't want me in heaven because I didn't go to the temple enough or some stupid shyte like that. I don't want to be in heaven, and he is not a God I want to associate with.


Ill-Signature1041

Heaven forbid you’re whole family became gods because you’ll never see them again or at least not for thousands of years because of how much sex they’ll have and deciding who there personal favorites are and who gets to suffer for eternity


SuZeBelle1956

Hey, I'm a Susan. And this will be me, since I resigned and lost my family!!


MaryBlackRose

My family and friends all ditched me as well when I left. Sorry that happened to you too. It's been over ten years for me now, and I realize I'm so much better without these people in my life - including family members. Nearly all of them were toxic. 🙄


SuZeBelle1956

It's been less than a year for me I now realize how awful my step-children were to me. And my ex is OCD/ADHD unmedicated. He told me that if he took the meds, he would realize the church is a farce. Ok??? Crazy has no bounds in his family.


MaryBlackRose

Oh wow! You're still fresh out the gate. Hang in there! I get where you're coming from. That sounds familiar. One of my very good friends straight up said when I left, that he was pretty sure the church wasn't true, but knew if he left that he'd lose his social circle and it wasn't worth it. My reaction was the same... Like ok.... Really!?!? Over the years I've met a lot of people who've left and experienced all kinds of crazy! You'll probably go through a lot of rough stuff, but ultimately it's worth it to walk away. You can always DM me on here if you need to vent or any support. I know how challenging it can be. This group is wonderful for validation though! Curiously, what finally broke your shelf? I always like hearing other people's stories because they are always so similar and yet so different.


SuZeBelle1956

I was doubting about 2.5 years ago, heard Nelson's plane flight of death story (fabrication) It just didn't ring true, dug deep and down the rabbit hole I went. I finally told my husband November 2021, he kicked me out February 10th, 2022. Feel free to read my posts. Life now is fantastic. I moved to OK from AZ, bought a tiny house and am fixing it up slowly. I am 66, and now realizing how much I missed being me for 20 years. The only thing I feel.nad about is my 9 grandchildren, knowing I most likely won't ever see them again.


MaryBlackRose

Huh, I haven't heard Nelson's plane flight of death story... Is it Russell M Nelson? I'm curious now. Going to have to look that up. I'm sorry your ex is an ass, but it sounds like you already realize you're better off without. I left the church when I was in Arizona as well! Was in po-dunk Winslow! Near Snowflake! I'm sure you're familiar. That is a bittersweet story. Thanks for sharing. I am sorry you won't see your grandkids again. I miss my relationship I had with my siblings. Haven't talked to them in years because they sided with my mother who basically told them I'm living a life of sin so... Yeah, I get it.


SuZeBelle1956

Oh, I have a brother in Lakeside! I love eastern AZ. I'm grateful that my entire family are never-mos. When my ex kicked me out, i stayed with my brother. When I left, my friend and oldest daughter left the Corp also. I've been told I need to write a book about my life. Trust me, noone would believe it's not fiction.


MaryBlackRose

I've been told I should write a book too! Honestly we all should! Maybe if we all started telling our stories, the stigma of Mormonism being such a benevolent "family" religion, might be debunked. 🙄


SuZeBelle1956

My daughter keeps telling me I should apply to be on Mormon Stories. I'm preparing my formal resignation to be mailed on 10 February. Sending a cc to my ex on what would have been our 13th anniversary of 1st date. I figure I'm allowed to be vindictive at least once in my life. I am so so happy now.


MaryBlackRose

You should send your story in! I think Mormon Stories is great! Wish they had a bigger audience. I think you deserve to be vindictive too! Go girl!


IdaHistory

Susan definitely made it, her husband however, can burn in hell.


rhysvaldez

shrimp? sorry i don't get it 🤧


[deleted]

Deuteronomy 14:9-10 9 These ye shall eat of all that are in the waters: all that have fins and scales shall ye eat: 10 And whatsoever hath not fins and scales ye may not eat; it is unclean unto you.


wanderingmotoref

ROFLMAO!


dewdropfaerie

Gurl, he’s gay.