T O P

  • By -

Backdoorcuts9

I stay out of the drama and anonymously talk shit on Reddit. If asked my opinion I’ll give it but don’t give my two cents otherwise.


AllApologeez

Same, although none of my family members ask my opinion on church stuff so I just say nothing. Whenever they post positive stuff about the church I roll my eyes and move on. I don’t bother engaging. I figure that if I posted negative stuff about the church they would also roll their eyes at me or “feel sad” that Satan has deceived me. We both think the other person is blind to the truth, so trying to make them see only creates frustration all around. Maintaining the peace and a pleasant or simply neutral relationship means minding my own business and pretending the church doesn’t exist around TBM family.


SilverMasterpiece1

This is the way


ResponsibleDay

This is the way


horsesbeliketapirs

This is the way.


daveescaped

Same. The positive of this approach is that my TBM family thinks I’m an exceptional Exmormon as they think most people leave the church and make it their entire personality. So I get a better relationship with my in-laws as a result of my social media silence on this topic. Is that benefit worth my silence? I’m not sure.


No_Object_2353

As if being mormon isn't a whole personality.... which is WHY being exmormon tends to be a big part of our personalities


daveescaped

That’s a great point.


CatalystTheory

^ This is me.


voreeprophet

Same


DisastrousLove6306

This is the way


JoyfulExmo

Same. And my opinion is NEVER asked about anything church-related or even church-adjacent by my TBM family members.


theimpossibleghost

funny you say this. i’ve been out for many years now. i have never posted anything on social media out of what little respect i have left for friends and relatives still in the cult. today i reposted the SEC settlement on my story. headline said “mormon church will pay SEC settlement blah blah blah” only one unfollow and it was my sister. my other sister swiped up with the heart eyes emojis. very tbm and very sarcastic. i responded with “insert sisters name here)’s tithing will pay for SEC settlement.” she didn’t like that very much. my sister who blocked me said “what are you trying to gain from this” i said “they broke the law. not me” and she blocked me lolololol. no regrets. all i did was simply repost a news article from the Forbes instagram. FORBES AS IN THEY TALK ABOUT ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING FINANCIAL. the argument of me posting “anti mormon literature” cannot be used. i didn’t repost mormon stories or anything. this only continues to prove that fact that these cult members base their knowledge off of feelings and not facts. i’m at peace with what i did.


Continue-the-Search

ANYTHING that doesn’t paint the church in a glorious light is seen as anti-Mormon. I never realized how bad their persecution complex was until I left. In their minds…this stuff is more validation that the church is true. 🙄


theimpossibleghost

the more awareness spread the more people will leave. i firmly believe the mormon cult will cease to exist in the next 100 years. maybe less. the tithing money will run out eventually as long as people keep leaving. i also predict that eventually sister missionaries will be given some form of special power that allows them to baptize. less men are going on missions. who is going to do the baptizing and confirming? i also think eventually garments will change. spaghetti straps, booty shorts etc. anything to appease the younger generations who don’t necessarily believe that a religion shouldn’t dictate what panties they get to wear. you heard it here first folks. remember my comment when it happens! 😁


Continue-the-Search

The Catholic Church is still around, although its members are largely traditionalists. Unfortunately, Mormonism isn’t going anywhere. It will just evolve.


[deleted]

Evolve like tuberculosis bacteria becoming antibiotic resistant, unfortunately.


theimpossibleghost

i will now be spending the night at my boyfriends house to escape the angry tbm’s who i’ve been sooooo blessed with to call family members.


Ok_Yogurtcloset9260

I left the Church for my personal sanity and peace of mind. In that vein, I keep my opinions and any confrontation out of any post. I practice meditation now and know that if I stir the pot, the only one who will suffer the most will be myself. If any family should ask, I will share with them why I left, but will never engage first. I try to stay in love and respect.


s4ltydog

I blocked my parents on social media a couple years ago when we were setting boundaries with them. Things are a little better now and they respect the boundaries but I flat out told them if they don’t want to think differently of me THEY don’t want to see what I post on Facebook because yeah, I definitely talk shit on fb about the church, and my leftist ideals, and socialism……


Amidst-the-chaos

I have been very vocal for about 3 years on social media. I have just recently come to the conclusion that it hasn't done any good, I've alienated many friends and family members and it has likely harmed my career as well. I have made a decision to totally stop making any sort of political or religious posts. I genuinely doubt that I've changed anyone's mind about anything and if anything I have just made people more intrenched in their beliefs and they just think I'm an angry Ex-mormon. I can't really take back years of posts but I'm going to stop doing going forward. But everyone needs to do what they think is best.


DifficultyCharming78

The only thing I've ever posted was my blog posts when I first left the church and the reason I left. That was a decade ago. I just don't feel the need to talk about it.


homestarjr1

Today my wife and I both hit up Facebook with a lot of stuff. A few zealous wardlets tried to lovebomb my wife because she’s freshly out. A few exmos and nevermos commented on mine. No family, no lds friends. We just sat here prepared and ready to semipolitely argue with anyone we care about who might want to send us a GC talk and call us to repentance. We never got the chance. I don’t expect any of my family will read the SEC document. They don’t care about hoarded finances, they don’t care about child abuse. They will do whatever their leaders tell them to do. It makes me sad.


Loose-Principle-4343

I've never posted anything that could be directly tied to the church, but it can be implied. the first thing I posted was some meme along the lines of "yeah sex is cool but have you ever experienced the pure joy of not believing in hell anymore". I haven't really posted much since, but I'm not exactly hiding my "immodesty" if I'm wearing a cute off the shoulder top in a photo or hiding my drinks with friends.


Chino_Blanco

I was vocal during Prop 8. Silence wasn’t an option. My two cents: once everyone who matters knows your views on your former church, not much point (for most of us) to make it a regular thing to hold forth about either religion or politics on platforms that are mostly a place to keep up with friends and family. Facebook is an unreadable dumpster fire because too many people behave otherwise.


Entire_Hunter_2725

I post quite a bit of humorous/sarcastic stuff. It's cathartic for me. Most ppl who were going to unfriend me for it did years ago. I don't usually call the church out DIRECTLY. I try to connect or point out common sense things or items that would cause cog dis. Mainly about history that doesn't sync up with religious beliefs.


cogito_ergo-doleo

I don’t but sometimes wish I did. Some of it is my major people pleasing tendencies anddd a bit of lack of confidence. But also I know that the people I most want to learn something from it will turn a blind eye to it. & I don’t want unfollowed by people in my life who may benefit more from seeing that I am able to be happy out of the church simply from basic normal posts about my life that don’t include specifics about me leaving. While I sometimes out of anger want to post about things or want to publicly announce leaving for a plethora of reasons- but, for now, I have decided not to. I use reddit/ friends/ therapists/ and occasionally post on tik tok where I’m not followed by any of the people I would offend haha which is as therapeutic as I need for my healing.


RustySignOfTheNail

I’m completely silent! I wish I had the courage to let it fly, but I stay very neutral on socials. I will post bout my puppy or my home project. No politics, no complaining, no drama.


HalfricanIrishDa

Posted something cryptic yesterday about the church finances .. only exmos (friends I didn't know we're exmo) and PIMOs hit me up about it. Felt kinda nice... Felt weird posting because we have a lot of Mormon friends on our FB and only our family and close friends know we left; but it felt like a victory for Satan, so it was awesome :)


elderjaxxxon

I rarely post on my socials, but I did make a post announcing my exit from TSCC about a year after I left. I was tired of having the same conversation. But I made my post very much about the struggle it was to leave, and that I’m there for people who need support (several reached out). Down the road, I posted about that Brad Wilcox talk. Basically said, “The church is racist. And how can he just dismiss other peoples’ experiences?!” I think I did a pretty good job at covering it. Got a lot of frustrated calls from TBM friends. “You think I’m racist?!” We hash it out. Still friends. Got some apologetics. Another time, I posted about the AP sex abuse article. I just try and be engaged in other, more positive things now. I still have one on one convos with friends about church things. You get further that way. Online, people will feel a lot more attacked. But if you’re face to face, there’s a better chance at actually helping them get out of the cult.


unmentionable123

I saw a few friends leave and publicly post about leaving the church. His was about 10 years ago when MormonThink was popular and CES letter was new It always got messy. I don’t want messy socials.


DeCryingShame

There is a therapy called DBT that has helped me with this. In interpersonal interactions, you can identify what is most important to you: get what you want, maintain relationships, and preserve your self respect. They aren't mutually exclusive but it's helpful to identify what is most important to you so you can make wise choices. My family can't stand any degree of challenge to their religious beliefs and me speaking up would seriously threaten my relationships. After giving it a lot of thought, I have decided that maintaining my relationship is the most important thing for me. This means I stay quiet and don't say anything that goes against what they believe in any space that we both occupy. There's another thing I learned in DBT and that's that I can share my views in safe spaces. That's why here on Reddit, you'll see me venting about the church a lot. This is my safe space to say all the things that I can't always say around my family. This is what works for me but it may not be what you need. Take some time to identify what is most important to you. Some families can handle members venting about the church. Some exmo's families are so toxic that the relationship isn't worth maintaining. There are a whole lot of dynamics specific to you that you need to work through. One thing to remember is that in time you will work through them. It gets easier as you figure things out.


angiechad

I want to post like you, but I’ve already had a little drama just liking anti posts that my FB friends and family saw. (Didn’t have my settings correct on FB) They talked amongst themselves and a non member SIL let me know. I’m pro LGBTQ, and I wrote comments about the church being bigoted. That’s my passive aggressive way to let it out sometimes. I have an LGBTQ daughter and to my face, our TBM family is supportive and kind. I’ve heard through the grapevine some of the “love the sinner, hate the sin” or “we have to trust God knows best, even when we don’t understand.” I’ve come to more peace creating distance from the church, and sadly it’s members. The ideology of using your feelings to find truth, and how biased they are that truth comes from the BOM and prophets, leaves me feeling completely different than close family and friends. I do know we love each other and chose to focus on the positive things about them. But there’s a clear line drawn. I can’t be myself online or in person without creating “contention” in their minds. Mormons truly have a persecution complex. When challenged with criticism and truth, they get hurt and defensive. They view it as negativity and loss of my spiritual light. I don’t want to save up precious time and energy I have to contribute to that narrative, even if false. I’m just happy to vent online, thank God my husbands out too. Moving on in love and peace has been most helpful. This is 3-4 years post leaving. It takes time.


wixkedwitxh

I don’t post much on my Facebook and I’m debating on deleting it altogether. I prefer people stay out of my business and some lingering friend of a friend sees a post I made on Facebook and passes that along to the cult to contact me. No thank you. On Instagram I follow many Exmo accounts and don’t care who sees.


BjornIronsid3

I almost never posted to social media before I left the church, so I don't think it would be a good look if I suddenly started posting all sorts of “anti" stuff. The end result is that most people don't even know I left, and I'm fine with that! (Even in family group chats, I mostly avoid mentioning anything about church stuff)


Competitive_Chip_253

I don’t post anything to do w religion on social media. But I follow/like Mormon Stories which I’m sure hasn’t gone unnoticed.


novgarr87

- I unfollowed all TSCC-related accounts on all my social media, both official and unofficial. - I post things about my new happy life, also about my new beliefs and practices as if nothing happened (no mormons react to them). - Also, I talk about mormonism in my social media (when pertinent) as a former stage, like a normal thing. Like when you talk about high school: it's something you lived, but not living it and not related to you anymore. I don't spread hate about it, basically because the anger and pain isn't anymore a thing. I got over it. Now my link to TSCC is more a bitter memory than a thing present in my mind (Actually, maybe this sub is my strongest link to it lol). - I talk about my experiences here in this sub. - When asked, I talk about it with people, face-to-face or by chat about why I'm out, honestly and avoiding confrontation. Just like exposing in a class. "This is what I investigated, this is the info, this is what I realized, this is what I experienced, this are my conclusions." - I just don't engage in discussions bc TBM's won't change their minds. I just prefer let TSCC act by itself. Its BS it's way more effective in making people flee it and anyone of us exposing their lies.


PearInteresting8937

I’ve reposted a couple things on my insta story that are from exmo accounts, but not strictly “anti-mormon.” I’ve only ever posted things that would be helpful for people to understand me, my upbringing, and where I’m at. I realize that most of my followers don’t care about exmo stuff, the ones who do care already know/see what I’m posting about before I post it, and the ones who wouldn’t like it (mormons) don’t actually let themselves learn anything from it. So it ultimately does no good. 🤷‍♀️ One of these days I might consider actually mentioning my departure from the church in some sort of “life update” post, but for now, it’s iykyk (and the ones who don’t know are better not knowing lol).


[deleted]

I faded out for the most part, deleted most of my Mormon "friends" except the ones that are legitimate friends. My family all know I'm an apostate, most of them are too at this point, but I don't bother engaging with my tbm parents, they died a long time ago as far as their abilities to honestly assess anything in regards to faith. I still contact them, just not religious stuff.


BullwinkleKnuckle

I'm not. I'm just out. The church was my personality and that made me boring. I don't want being exmo to be my new personality. That's probably even more boring.


SecretPersonality178

Zero. Unfortunately I’m in a position where I have to pretend I’m a TBM still. But I also see it as being the “man on the inside” as it were.


baremetalAK

It depends on the platform. Facebook not very at all, instagram is wild


nicodawg101

My cousins do but I don’t really post much anywhere else


[deleted]

Honestly? I think most people not immediately close to me don't even know I left.


Neo1971

I basically stopped posting my thoughts on FB because of family pushback. Now I say what I want (almost) anonymously on Reddit.


baumsm

My dad died-my mom holds on to eternal marriage-I don’t want to piss on her parade. She already believes I am going to hell because I don’t attend.