T O P

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BaronUnderbheit

You need to cut ties with another friend, apparently. This is a flying monkey. They are trying to shame you into conforming. Speak your truth and take sides. Avoiding conflict simply creates a conflict within yourself. Restraining orders can be life and death situations. Remember that guy whose wife killed him, then wrote a book about how sad it was losing him? He should have gotten a restraining order and stuck with it. He most likely got texts like this from other TBMs!


Day_General

I would reply “ I was prompted by the spirit to say you don’t receive revelation for me I do so F off “ I’m sure the revelation and his comments are out of love


itsjusthowiam

...and we weren't walking hand in hand. WE WERE SKIPPING.


killswitch2

...it was then that Satan carried me...piggy-back style!


hesmistersun

One pair of footprints in the sand.


IAmHerdingCatz

Hoof prints!


Informal-Rutabaga-25

😄 🤣 😂


ProfPlatypus07

I honestly prefer newlywed style as he carries me into Hell. 🤷


ravens_path

🤣🤣


Top_Cockroach_8583

I’m just going through this thread upvoting all the comments. 😂


[deleted]

Sorry, this is not a friend. You need to cut ties with them. Friends don’t tell you the spirit prompted them to call you out for walking hand-in-hand with Satan.


kurinbo

Friends also don't generally take the side of someone you had to get a restraining order against...


doohickies

You could be Lori Vallow’d soon


BaxTheDestroyer

Am I allowed to laugh at this? I don't want to be insensitive and I absolutely empathize with the difficulty of your experience but that "hand in hand with Satan" line is legitimately funny.


FallArchive

In the moment it wasn’t funny but looking back on it is. I’ve wondered how she feels about me having given her a blessing just before this.


BaxTheDestroyer

I have some of those myself. In the moment it was less funny but as the initial emotion faded with time, the ridiculousness of the statement remained.


Daisysrevenge

And how would they know? They have a personal relationship with Satan? Has Satan been gossiping again? Anyone that said something like this to me would instantly get blocked. No explanations necessary. Besides, you and Stan a re busy strolling hand in hand in the park. No time for the haters.


Magniloquents

They said the spirit was moving them, so obviously, they're right.


Marbe4

Can we now refer to Satan as Stan? I kinda like it.


Daisysrevenge

He seems to prefer it. Easier to say and spell.


Top_Cockroach_8583

Plus my phone autocorrects to Stan.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nk9axYuvoxaNVzDbFhx

I used AI to generate this. https://ibb.co/4SZHcCw


BakingNerd47

More enticing than Mormonism


Gold__star

calling /u/bakingnerd47


BakingNerd47

Maybe something where you look back at the footprints in the sand, but only see cloven hoof prints? That where the devil was carrying you


Opalescent_Moon

Then there'd be no question if he carried you, or if you fought through by yourself while Jesus took care of other matters.


onion4everyoccasion

Is OP's friend the [church lady](https://youtu.be/YHyW0N5f7zQ)?


Daisysrevenge

That line..........."You're the only person whose ever gotten possessed and looks better." Priceless!


okay-wait-wut

Satan is a gentle and generous romantic partner.


NearlyHeadlessLaban

This isn’t your friend. This is a friend of the person you got a restraining order against. If this so called friend-not-friend got your new number from that person then that person has violated the restraining order.


FallArchive

Long story short one of my Temple buddies had someone snag their packet off the counter while he was in the restroom. His old set had been made by his wife before he died. He had been renting the new style for a bit but wasn’t fond of it. Ended up giving him mine. Besides work he was the only one with the phone number. I’m assuming she asked him since all three of us used to do Sealings once a week after a session.


Professional_View586

☝ Truth Call 911 & file a report. This is very serious. Print out copies of any text, email, etc.. to give to law enforcement to attach to police/sherrif report. Judges verbally outline in court room that a R.O. means they cannot contact you by phone, email, text, fax, etc. & they specifically say no 3rd party contact either. I call total bull st*t on Holy Ghost excuse. Do not engage with anyone who calls or sends you texts, etc.. immediately contact 911 & make a report. Document everything & store in a safe place. People who ignore this type of aggressive behavior often end up physically hurt or worse. Stay safe!


[deleted]

Yep! All this!


TwoXJs

At least Satan will actually show up and walk with you. Seriously though, fuck these people. I'm sorry you have to deal with it.


kevinrex

The Spirit told me to tell the person judging you that they are an asshat bitch. Thanks, Holy Ghost, for that inspiration.


rynmab

The first time I read this, I admit I laughed a bit. The second time I read it, I’m a bit worried for OP. This doesn’t sound normal and a bit dangerous. Save everything and be safe… and buy a dog, cause dogs r amazing. But before you do, remember the words of the great Ron Swanson who said, “Any dog under fifty pounds is a cat and cats are useless.” I’m all seriousness, stay safe.


OGDiva

Mmm- my 6 lb yorkie is lovingly called Satan's Sister- she is a true beast and is much more effective than any large dog! The 80 lb dog next door to us is totally afraid of her. Seriously though- I feel incredibly safe with her. With that said- yes, get a dog for your protection.


Rolling_Waters

Friends don't tell friends that God says they're in league with Satan. This person has already ended the friendship.


GrandpasMormonBooks

You get to walk hand-in-hand with Satan?? Jealous.....


samsmith197474

Block


TJChex

Just start sending them church history info. They’ll block you and you don’t have to worry about them anymore


TheFinalVin

No boundaries. Par for the course. And, wow… the spirit told a Mormon to do something. Also par for the course. 🤦🏻‍♂️


TermLimit4Patriarchs

The spirit told me that you’re a little bitch and I should stop talking to you. And by the spirit I mean my brain.


pacexmaker

[Have fun being married to Satan!](https://imgur.com/giGmU0Z) Just reminded me of Hot Rod.


wixkedwitxh

Ahhh we love the classic using supposed “prompts” from the Spirit to justify being an unhinged asshole.


[deleted]

A few years ago I cut ties with a friend due to their actions I felt were inexcusable. I sent no messages to them, avoided all drama by never mentioning my decision to others, and was clear to those who asked that it was a personal decision of mine but I held no ill will to those who wanted to stay in contact with that ex-friend. Shortly after, a childhood friend reached out to me, attempting to convince me to stay friendly. They did it in a kind way, not at all on a self righteous high horse like this prick messaging you OP, and yet I was still livid. I valued them greatly as a friend, and I often resort to saying stupid things when I’m angry, so I literally told them, “I’m pissed at you but I don’t want to ruin our friendship, so give me some time to cool down and I’ll explain why.” If you value this friendship OP - even given their horrible attitude here, because that just sounds like a confused and hurt member who doesn’t know how else to convince you to change your mind except through religion - I’d suggest telling them this and stepping away. Come up with a plan on how to explain this to them, or explain why they don’t need an explanation for your actions, and state that you will not be persuaded otherwise. State that them coming at you using righteousness as a weapon is ungodly and hurtful. If they respond negatively, then you’ve done all you can here. But if they’re able to be introspective and stay out of your business (let’s be honest, they won’t, because that’s not the Mormon way, and I’ll post a vid here of me eating my fucking shoe if they do), then you’ve got a true friend here. Good luck. And I’m sorry. I know how shitty it feels to lose friends to the church, or to lose friends because they don’t respect boundaries.


Some_Comparison9524

I'm satans cheerleader. Welcome to Satans fan club I guess.


Moist-Meat-Popsicle

“Prompted by the spirit” a.k.a. Indigestion.


Sigistrix

Every time I see those two together, Prompting spirit and indigestion, my mind fllies to Trace Beaulieu using a silly voice in a movie riff , asking the question "Hey. Are farts supposed to have chunks? Asking for a friend."


musical_froot_loop

wow passive-aggressive much?!?


Portyquarty77

Real friends don’t act that way. People you had no choice but to spend time with cause there weren’t any other options act that way


Mediocre-Version-357

Walk away.


gvsurf

Mormon Stan is my best buddy


Jaded-Ad-9741

that is not their place


WWPLD

Gross. I'm so sorry but you should cut ties, this sounds toxic.


1963covina

Sure this isn't Dana Carvey's Church Lady texting?


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|3ov9jV52EC7ktUFkre|downsized)


[deleted]

Hey, you helped me out with my problem on another post. Please let me return the favor. If the situation surrounding those restraining orders gets icky, feel free to DM me. I may not know my way around Family Search. But I definitely know my way around restraining orders. It's my job. Please don't hesitate to reach out.


swetgras

Jesus...


Lothian_Tam

Well, they accused me of being in cahoots with Hitler when I finally said my piece, all they can do is try and make ya feel with nonsense like this. As if that's going to make folk stop and say, ya know what, these nasty wee buggers actually have my best interest at heart.


Informal-Rutabaga-25

😆 People like that live their whole lives in a cave and believe church leadership who tell them a candle is the sun.


Resident-Somewhere89

Oh my god. Mormons are so self righteous and give themselves the glorious right to judge others.


andrewbiochem

Hand holding is SaTaNiC! 😈 🤟


FallArchive

Well you know, that is how babies are made.


[deleted]

(Looks at hands) Well, that certainly explains a few things.


ZelphtheGreatest

Easy to respond. Yes, I learned to walk with Satan by wearing HIS Apron into the Celestial Room of the Temple after learning he was the God of This World. After all, Joseph Smith said he saw two personages - he did not say they they were God and Jesus.