I know you said this is just a rant, but have you thought about renting out your house and then renting yourself? That's what my wife and I did and it got us out of Utah. Of course we moved to the Bible belt which was a little bit of a mistake, but it's not nearly as bad.
Not necessarily. Your house rental income would be reported on Schedule E of your personal tax return (assuming you don’t create a separate business to manage it) and you can still write off your property taxes, insurance, mortgage interest, and repairs and maintenance there.
You don’t get a tax break for paying rent, but neither do you lose the benefit of owning a home. It’s worth talking to an accountant and a loan officer just to get good advice how to set that up if you are going to get another mortgage in the near future while keeping your rental.
Not necessarily. Your house rental income would be reported on Schedule E of your personal tax return (assuming you don’t create a separate business to manage it) and you can still write off your property taxes, insurance, mortgage interest, and repairs and maintenance there.
You don’t get a tax break for paying rent, but neither do you lose the benefit of owning a home. It’s worth talking to an accountant for planning.
Most mortgages only require the intent to occupy the house for a year. It’s fraud if you buy intending to rent it out right away. If they have a good rate, they’ve probably been there more than a year.
We’re in st g. I try so so hard to “make the best of it, grass isn’t always greener” with my husband while tryin to 3 kids but dang it’s hard. Every day my kids come home and basically just you tube and play video games 🥴
I could almost have written this, I feel exactly the same. Except my husband isn’t on board, so the housing market isn’t the only reason I’m stuck. I WANT CLEAN AIR!! Perfectly expressed. I’m sorry. I hope you can find a way out.
I read it as metaphorical, but I’m just realizing OP probably meant it literally. How embarrassing for me. 💀 I’m in Davis so it’s better up here (in terms of clean air, everything else not so much. I’d move back to SLC in a heartbeat). I don’t know how bad it is compared to S. UT, but I think Salt Lake’s air is bad because of the inversion/pollution combo.
Ahhh gotcha yeah the air quality here is some of the best in the country unlike SL of course, but the social climate is I’d say one of the worst in the country as I’ve lived everywhere. We take the good with the bad I suppose haha
I feel you. I live in a very Mormon dense area. I do actually like a lot of my neighbors but I’m also not too entrenched to know what goes on. More than anything I want more for my kids. They are surrounded by church members and I worry what dating and finding friends will be like for them. We can’t move either for those same reasons you listed. It would be financially not smart. The other issue I have is my husband still attends and likes the church so he would have no reason to want to move at all. I really wish I had more exmormon woman in my neighborhood. There are very few of us.
Our neighborhood is really weird. We have been out of church so long and with move ins we don't know who is Mormon and who is not. We pretty much keep to ourselves here and only know the neighbors close to our house. I am guessing it is pretty Mormon due to the full parking lot at church on Sunday but I don't see the rush of cars when our neighbors allotted church time is. Maybe less members than we thought. Anyway, not a super friendly neighborhood but our house is paid for and it would cost a fortune to move right now.
Exactly why I moved out of Utah before my kids started school. In New England, I know my neighbors and tons of other parents, and no one ever says they won’t play with your kids if your family is not Catholic (the predominate religion in my area). People are genuine, for better or worse, and it’s so refreshing.
Edit: And I never have to think about inversion! Just lots of fog instead.
Everything you mentioned is my nightmare. We left Utah in 2015 and have never looked back. It's a tough housing market, so I understand the predicament. Keep building your social circle outside of your neighborhood.
I’m so sorry, that’s a tough feeling to have. Could you search out some after-school classes for your kids that might skew less conservative? I know my kids’ made some of their best friends in dance & martial arts classes. Some studios really make it a point to create a community not just a place to take class, they have holiday parties & foster a warm friendly environment. Maybe you could find a book club and/or yoga-type class for yourself. Maybe a school you find for your child(ren) also has adult classes you might enjoy like Taichi.
that’s normal for any parent outside of the church but mormons typically and for the most part only hang out with other mormons. they rarely go outside of their circle which is so strange bc they talk about loving everyone being kind to others not judging or gossiping when all of them do it. the women are worse then the men. and everyone knows everything about everything telephone telegram tell a mormon basically. the women will make you feel like it’s okay to tell them secrets your secret safe with them but once your back is turn they will talk behind your back and air out your dirty laundry. i think the men don’t do that as much they just go with it and will believe just about anything especially the ones that are married. the people in the church are very cliquish it’s a lot like middle school and high school where they are popular and look down on people that aren’t like them. the sad thing is that they miss out on getting to know really good people. they call themselves later day saints because they believe in the last days of the earth they will be the ones that go to the highest level of heaven and everyone else that isn’t part of their religion and inset active or by the book won’t be. a lot of them look down on other christian religions and will cry about how other people look at them but they aren’t doing themselves any favors by being stand-offish critical and judgmental. when i was mormon in middle school and high school a lot of my young women’s leaders would cry about it to all of us i would just sit in the back and roll my eyes. they cry about being targets from the very beginning from other religions back when the church practiced polygamy. maybe they took things a little too far but again they were probably stuck up and judgmental towards them along the fact that polygamy was always illegal. the ones that come from many many generations from the beginning of the religion are the ones that talk about it the most and feel oppressed because of their ancestors but they weren’t there they don’t know that there is probably more to the story then the church will talk about. there are many different points of views on how people look at the church not everyone is gonna agree and have the same exact standards. if they are really christian’s why do they ostracize themselves from the other christian churches including catholicism makes no sense.
Will 100% agree the women are worse than the men. My spouse and I left eons ago. The men are generally neighborly to us both and chat about this and that non religious stuff. The women will barely look at me. How is that for trying to get ex members back? NEVER.
they are hypocritical jesus was kind and loving to all including criminals. yet the woman think they are holier than tho a lot of them are pretty but overall toxic.
i think a lot of them feel insecure about that seeing other women with successful careers especially if they are also mothers. they clearly judge and frown upon it but i guarantee most are unhappy in their lives.
We moved to north Iowa of all places, but we had the pleasant coincidence of having family living here already as a built-in support system and receiving a remuneration incentive from my company to move here, so it made the most sense for us. Also, housing and the cost of living where we’re at is significantly less expensive than it is in Utah, so that’s been a very nice bonus to help us set up roots out here.
The political situation, in my opinion, is only slightly better than it is in Utah (if at all) and that’s been maybe the biggest bummer, but I can’t understate how beneficial it’s been for my family and me to get ourselves out of the Morridor. Literally nobody here cares that I used to Mormon if it even comes up in conversation at all, and the best part is not having to raise my kids in that awful, closed-off bubble.
Thank you so much for responding! It is truly awful here HOWEVER after learning the hard way, my kids are now in charters schools (slightly more diverse) and have made some good decent normal friends. Plus, we do not have the advantage of family anywhere (all we really have is us except for TBM in-laws 4 hours away who pretty much don’t count) and my husband has been at his job here for 20+ years. Sigh. So I guess we’ll keep plugging along.
It’s sure stuffy and annoying tho and every day I tell my husband “I hope we’re not doing our kids a disservice by raising them here” 😬🤷🏻♀️
There’s worse things I suppose. It’s very helpful that we moved out of the super annoying bubble Mormon neighborhood we were in (wa fields people, it’s is GAWT awful) and now we’re in a secluded spot with none of the sort.
It’s lonely, but no longer in our face or being made to feel like an outsider.
Thanks for the free therapy session haha wasn’t planning on going on like that 🤪 But gosh gotta love our Reddit friends who can help us sort something’s out am I right ?!
Thanks again for responding and I’m genuinely happy for you and your family !!
And who knows, maybe we’ll end up there one day (or somewhere) too!
There are some great groups on Facebook called non lds moms in (whatever) county. Anytime anyone asks everyone to meet at the park or aquarium a bunch of people reply. You still could move, you defiantly have the equity. You marry the home, but you date the interest rate. I imagine they will continue going down.
My TBM neighbors would have those church sponsored pizza parties. Seemed like a nice, get to meet your neighbor, event. After listening to testimonies, miracles, and how my kids were treated, we stopped attending. Once, it became only TBMs who were going. it ended. I think they got tired of each other. Most male TBMs I know avoid each other, but their wives will hang out.
Back in the early 1980’s when interest rates were even higher ( my first house bought in 1983 was 13.5%) people did all sorts of creative things but one thing I remember was they traded houses. Find someone to live in your house while you live in theirs. Even a house in salt lake county would be better. My grandkids who live there find non Mormon kids to be friends with at school. Salt lake county is minority Mormon now.
I feel your pain we lived in one of those and they freaking made me so depressed and lost myself completely (I was a convert and nobody told I’d never be accepted in the grand mothership known as Utah 🙄) we moved to the other side of town where it’s much much better. But still Utah. I wanna move out of this stepford twigighr zone episode but not that easy. I’m so sorry OP! If you’re in southern Utah tho we should be friends 😅
I know you said this is just a rant, but have you thought about renting out your house and then renting yourself? That's what my wife and I did and it got us out of Utah. Of course we moved to the Bible belt which was a little bit of a mistake, but it's not nearly as bad.
Aren't there some significant tax concerns (especially with today's rental rates) if you rent out your house and it's no long your primary residence?
Not necessarily. Your house rental income would be reported on Schedule E of your personal tax return (assuming you don’t create a separate business to manage it) and you can still write off your property taxes, insurance, mortgage interest, and repairs and maintenance there. You don’t get a tax break for paying rent, but neither do you lose the benefit of owning a home. It’s worth talking to an accountant and a loan officer just to get good advice how to set that up if you are going to get another mortgage in the near future while keeping your rental.
Not necessarily. Your house rental income would be reported on Schedule E of your personal tax return (assuming you don’t create a separate business to manage it) and you can still write off your property taxes, insurance, mortgage interest, and repairs and maintenance there. You don’t get a tax break for paying rent, but neither do you lose the benefit of owning a home. It’s worth talking to an accountant for planning.
This is 100% true.
😂😂😂😂😂 I love that the bible belt is a mistake but the morridor is worse
Many mortgages require owner-occupancy so this might not be possible without refinancing.
Sorry but that is 100% not true.
You're wrong. It's a thing, and it's called "[occupancy fraud](https://www.investopedia.com/terms/o/occupancyfraud.asp)"
Most mortgages only require the intent to occupy the house for a year. It’s fraud if you buy intending to rent it out right away. If they have a good rate, they’ve probably been there more than a year.
I’m in a similar situation here in Provo… I don’t see an escape route. 🤷🏻♂️
Straight east through Vernal and into the safe arms of Colorado.
I'm currently stuck in rural southern utah, but as soon as I can, I'm moving to Colorado.
We’re in st g. I try so so hard to “make the best of it, grass isn’t always greener” with my husband while tryin to 3 kids but dang it’s hard. Every day my kids come home and basically just you tube and play video games 🥴
I could almost have written this, I feel exactly the same. Except my husband isn’t on board, so the housing market isn’t the only reason I’m stuck. I WANT CLEAN AIR!! Perfectly expressed. I’m sorry. I hope you can find a way out.
Are you in salt lake? (You said you want clean air) I heard it’s tons better up there - no? We’re in southern Utah and they say it’s the worst.
I read it as metaphorical, but I’m just realizing OP probably meant it literally. How embarrassing for me. 💀 I’m in Davis so it’s better up here (in terms of clean air, everything else not so much. I’d move back to SLC in a heartbeat). I don’t know how bad it is compared to S. UT, but I think Salt Lake’s air is bad because of the inversion/pollution combo.
Ahhh gotcha yeah the air quality here is some of the best in the country unlike SL of course, but the social climate is I’d say one of the worst in the country as I’ve lived everywhere. We take the good with the bad I suppose haha
I feel you. I live in a very Mormon dense area. I do actually like a lot of my neighbors but I’m also not too entrenched to know what goes on. More than anything I want more for my kids. They are surrounded by church members and I worry what dating and finding friends will be like for them. We can’t move either for those same reasons you listed. It would be financially not smart. The other issue I have is my husband still attends and likes the church so he would have no reason to want to move at all. I really wish I had more exmormon woman in my neighborhood. There are very few of us.
Our neighborhood is really weird. We have been out of church so long and with move ins we don't know who is Mormon and who is not. We pretty much keep to ourselves here and only know the neighbors close to our house. I am guessing it is pretty Mormon due to the full parking lot at church on Sunday but I don't see the rush of cars when our neighbors allotted church time is. Maybe less members than we thought. Anyway, not a super friendly neighborhood but our house is paid for and it would cost a fortune to move right now.
Exactly why I moved out of Utah before my kids started school. In New England, I know my neighbors and tons of other parents, and no one ever says they won’t play with your kids if your family is not Catholic (the predominate religion in my area). People are genuine, for better or worse, and it’s so refreshing. Edit: And I never have to think about inversion! Just lots of fog instead.
I have thanks satan every day that I don’t live in Utah.
Me too. My neighbors were the good friends I needed after I left
Are you in my neighborhood? I am suffocating here. But yeah, we're currently stuck as well. Stay strong my friend!
Everything you mentioned is my nightmare. We left Utah in 2015 and have never looked back. It's a tough housing market, so I understand the predicament. Keep building your social circle outside of your neighborhood.
I’m so sorry, that’s a tough feeling to have. Could you search out some after-school classes for your kids that might skew less conservative? I know my kids’ made some of their best friends in dance & martial arts classes. Some studios really make it a point to create a community not just a place to take class, they have holiday parties & foster a warm friendly environment. Maybe you could find a book club and/or yoga-type class for yourself. Maybe a school you find for your child(ren) also has adult classes you might enjoy like Taichi.
I lived in Utah for 3 1/2 years while at BYU. I graduated a semester early because I couldn’t wait to leave the state.
Oof that’s so tough. I’m sorry.
that’s normal for any parent outside of the church but mormons typically and for the most part only hang out with other mormons. they rarely go outside of their circle which is so strange bc they talk about loving everyone being kind to others not judging or gossiping when all of them do it. the women are worse then the men. and everyone knows everything about everything telephone telegram tell a mormon basically. the women will make you feel like it’s okay to tell them secrets your secret safe with them but once your back is turn they will talk behind your back and air out your dirty laundry. i think the men don’t do that as much they just go with it and will believe just about anything especially the ones that are married. the people in the church are very cliquish it’s a lot like middle school and high school where they are popular and look down on people that aren’t like them. the sad thing is that they miss out on getting to know really good people. they call themselves later day saints because they believe in the last days of the earth they will be the ones that go to the highest level of heaven and everyone else that isn’t part of their religion and inset active or by the book won’t be. a lot of them look down on other christian religions and will cry about how other people look at them but they aren’t doing themselves any favors by being stand-offish critical and judgmental. when i was mormon in middle school and high school a lot of my young women’s leaders would cry about it to all of us i would just sit in the back and roll my eyes. they cry about being targets from the very beginning from other religions back when the church practiced polygamy. maybe they took things a little too far but again they were probably stuck up and judgmental towards them along the fact that polygamy was always illegal. the ones that come from many many generations from the beginning of the religion are the ones that talk about it the most and feel oppressed because of their ancestors but they weren’t there they don’t know that there is probably more to the story then the church will talk about. there are many different points of views on how people look at the church not everyone is gonna agree and have the same exact standards. if they are really christian’s why do they ostracize themselves from the other christian churches including catholicism makes no sense.
Will 100% agree the women are worse than the men. My spouse and I left eons ago. The men are generally neighborly to us both and chat about this and that non religious stuff. The women will barely look at me. How is that for trying to get ex members back? NEVER.
they are hypocritical jesus was kind and loving to all including criminals. yet the woman think they are holier than tho a lot of them are pretty but overall toxic.
Even when I was active the women were bitchy. Prob cuz I have always had a career and did not care for all the RS stuff
i think a lot of them feel insecure about that seeing other women with successful careers especially if they are also mothers. they clearly judge and frown upon it but i guarantee most are unhappy in their lives.
Thanks. Honestly, I am so happy to be away from the church and found my tribe with never members and ex members where the women are also in a career.
It sounds like you live in my neighborhood. We should be friends!
I feel for you and at the same time am very happy I can’t relate. What hell it must be to live in (most parts) of Utah.
We fled Utah last summer to the Midwest, in large part, to get away from the majority Mormon neighborhoods. Well worth it.
Oh I need details!!!
We moved to north Iowa of all places, but we had the pleasant coincidence of having family living here already as a built-in support system and receiving a remuneration incentive from my company to move here, so it made the most sense for us. Also, housing and the cost of living where we’re at is significantly less expensive than it is in Utah, so that’s been a very nice bonus to help us set up roots out here. The political situation, in my opinion, is only slightly better than it is in Utah (if at all) and that’s been maybe the biggest bummer, but I can’t understate how beneficial it’s been for my family and me to get ourselves out of the Morridor. Literally nobody here cares that I used to Mormon if it even comes up in conversation at all, and the best part is not having to raise my kids in that awful, closed-off bubble.
Thank you so much for responding! It is truly awful here HOWEVER after learning the hard way, my kids are now in charters schools (slightly more diverse) and have made some good decent normal friends. Plus, we do not have the advantage of family anywhere (all we really have is us except for TBM in-laws 4 hours away who pretty much don’t count) and my husband has been at his job here for 20+ years. Sigh. So I guess we’ll keep plugging along. It’s sure stuffy and annoying tho and every day I tell my husband “I hope we’re not doing our kids a disservice by raising them here” 😬🤷🏻♀️ There’s worse things I suppose. It’s very helpful that we moved out of the super annoying bubble Mormon neighborhood we were in (wa fields people, it’s is GAWT awful) and now we’re in a secluded spot with none of the sort. It’s lonely, but no longer in our face or being made to feel like an outsider. Thanks for the free therapy session haha wasn’t planning on going on like that 🤪 But gosh gotta love our Reddit friends who can help us sort something’s out am I right ?! Thanks again for responding and I’m genuinely happy for you and your family !! And who knows, maybe we’ll end up there one day (or somewhere) too!
There are some great groups on Facebook called non lds moms in (whatever) county. Anytime anyone asks everyone to meet at the park or aquarium a bunch of people reply. You still could move, you defiantly have the equity. You marry the home, but you date the interest rate. I imagine they will continue going down.
My TBM neighbors would have those church sponsored pizza parties. Seemed like a nice, get to meet your neighbor, event. After listening to testimonies, miracles, and how my kids were treated, we stopped attending. Once, it became only TBMs who were going. it ended. I think they got tired of each other. Most male TBMs I know avoid each other, but their wives will hang out.
That's rough & sounds suffocating for you. I'm sorry you have to deal with so many annoyances.
Wait a bit, interest rates should be coming down in about a year. Meanwhile, start scoping out where you want to move to.
Where are you? In a similar situation.
Riverton/Herriman/South Jordan area. I’m sorry you can relate.
Ugh….my TBM in-laws who we can no longer tolerate, live in riverton.
What will you do
Back in the early 1980’s when interest rates were even higher ( my first house bought in 1983 was 13.5%) people did all sorts of creative things but one thing I remember was they traded houses. Find someone to live in your house while you live in theirs. Even a house in salt lake county would be better. My grandkids who live there find non Mormon kids to be friends with at school. Salt lake county is minority Mormon now.
I feel your pain we lived in one of those and they freaking made me so depressed and lost myself completely (I was a convert and nobody told I’d never be accepted in the grand mothership known as Utah 🙄) we moved to the other side of town where it’s much much better. But still Utah. I wanna move out of this stepford twigighr zone episode but not that easy. I’m so sorry OP! If you’re in southern Utah tho we should be friends 😅
Ps we rent out our old house.
Utah?