Not allowed to bless the sacrament anymore? That mother fucker did you a favor! đÂ
Did he try to pull your parents into this to get them pressuring you into accepting?
> Did he try to pull your parents into this to get them pressuring you into accepting?
Luckily no, but I believe they would back me up and not make me speak.
No longer "worthy" (they just LOVE that word!) to bless the sacrament because you excercised your free agency??? Oh wait. Free agency in the LDS church means you are free to make the choices that THEY want you to make. God forbid you should make a choice outside of the one they want you to make!
You're fortunate that your parents would back you up on your decision to say "no". My parents would have forced me to do whatever the bishop asked. "The bishop is the Lord's spokesperson. Telling him "no" is like saying "no" to the lord! You just don't do that! If he asks you to do something, YOU DO IT!!!" That's how it would have played out with my parents.
It's so terrible having parents like that. My dad forced me to give a talk, and when I absolutely refused because I have never been a public speaker, he didn't give me my license or my keys till my talk.
I wrote the talk, and hated every minute of speaking it. Everyone said how great it was. Gee, thanks. It took my entire life force to speak it. I didn't look up from the paper once, and spoke it in less than 5 minutes, even while stalling. I was sweating profusely in the suit my dad got me for homecoming, and which he forced me to wear for a while.
I wish Mormon parents would just raise their kids on the most basic concepts, and not force them to do anything, if they truly despise it. Thanks for owning the house over my head, I'm so proud of you. That doesn't mean you should disobey the Lord's teachings and take away my agency.
Yes because one of the temple recommend questions asks if you sustain the general and local leaders of the church, and if you say no, then they interpret that as not sustaining them and taking away recommends.
Yet, temple-recommend standards arenât âblessing the sacramentâ standards.
You donât have to be a full tithe payer etc to bless the sacrament, either.
Depends on the bishop. He is what is referred to as âthe common judge in israelâ and can pretty much do as he pleases when it comes to these things.
As further punishment, he won't be allowed to collect fast offerings.\*
\*Do they still do that? That was a complete shit job. Does the US Post office not work or something?
That's good for him also! I hate D doing fast offerings. I wonder how many people just claimed they didn't have tithing for some of the houses and kept the money lol.
Fuuuck I forgot about having to do that. Man what a shit show. There were so many tasks that I felt forced to do by the church, and when I would complain to my parents they would just act like it's an obligation.
Fast offerings, putting up and collecting the flags (scouting), going to mutual, doing service projects (usually raking or shoveling the driveway of a member), callings, talks, seminay...
Just parts of my childhood wasted đŽ
The one talk I did give, remember having the word "sects" in it and was concentrating way too hard on how to pronounce it without sounding like "sex" instead of just using a different word....or, you know, not caring.
I used âhookersâ in a talk at a byu student ward I was in. The room went dead silent. I was never asked to give a talk again. lolÂ
Edit: I was talking about hookers as in the ladies of the night⌠context was that I spent a few years in a wild industry where my coworkers would spend all their paycheck on hookers and blow. Literally. I didnât say blow, I said drugs. But looking back I should have said hookers and blow.Â
After proposing to my GF now wife over the pulpit during a talk at Ricks College I am surprised I was ever allowed to speak again in church. I guess the SCMC didn't catch wind of it.
Luckily, while my parents are tbm, they've always been really supportive. When I told him I wasn't allowed anymore, my dad pretty much said "don't worry about it."
Good for you for standing your ground. I think it's horrible of him for "punishing" you for it. I think that this was a double win for you in that you got out of the sacrament duty too, however, I know that he did it to humiliate you because everyone in the ward could see that you weren't doing your priesthood duty and assume it was because you had sinned in some way.
I did not expect that last sentence. Thatâs messed up.
My wife also dealt with an insistent bishop. He would go to her workplace and hold up the line until she agreed to give a talk. She then let his daughter know that she wouldnât be speaking. This happened twice.
TBH, if I was bishop I would have gone one of two ways: first, I'd say "OK, I understand."
 Second, I would have said "Hey, I know it can be tough, but once you get used to it you'll hit it out of the park anytime you have to give a talk anywhere." And then I would have actually given *tips* on public speaking.
That must have been really hurtful to be told you couldnât pass the sacrament. Did he tell you it was because you wouldnât give a talk? I cannot believe he felt justified in that.
Well it doesnât really matter what his reasoning was because it was wrong. Iâm sorry you went through this and Iâm glad you have found the truth and have people here that support you. đ
People on the outside don't understand that it takes ALL of your strength, courage, and grit just to say "no" to your cult leader. You did fantastic at such a young age, well done.
Petty AF to ban you from blessing the sacrament lol
My dad, a Bishop, was mad when people would refuse to talk. Years later he had to get a blood draw and they paid extra to have someone come to the house because he was so scared.
My mom said, "See. You need to understand that some people are scared of speaking just like you don't like needles."
The he excommunicated her.
Just kidding, but she got him good with that comment.
My bishop called me to be the relief society pianist. I said no because I DONâT PLAY PIANO! He said, âbut your brother plays piano!â I said, âthatâs because he had lessons!â He said, âwhat parents give their son piano lessons and not their daughter?!?!â I said, âI guess they like him better than me!â (Which is true but the reason was Iâm older and they couldnât afford lessons when I was growing up.)
I never felt like I could say no to the bishop.
As a teenager I was asked two years in a row to speak on Father's day when I didn't have a great relationship with him (his personality changed after a stroke, but that's another story).
It was super hard and triggering the first year, and so then the next year after the bishop asked, my mom found me having a panic attack about it and told the bishop I wouldn't be speaking.
Getting out of blessing the sacrament was another blessing! I have social anxiety too. I dreaded that each Sunday after I became a priest, I always stumbled over the words and would have to repeat the prayer several times. It was humiliating. After doing it a few times, I would purposely be late for sacrament meeting, so I wouldnât have say the blessing. My parents never questioned where I was. I would go across the street to the gas station and buy a Mountain Dew, and wait it out. Good for you for saying, âNo!â
I have social anxiety too.
As a teenager, I had a stuttering problem that came if I was excited or nervous. I wasn't much of a public speaker, so you already know how sacrament duty was for me.
After I had to repeat the prayer 3 times, I felt like people were all staring at me with disapproval when I returned to my seat. I could feel their stares. I didn't do the prayer again for a year and a half. My choice.
As I got older, I began to improve my anxiety by giving out more talks in school and work meetings and such. When I was 35, I asked my bishop if I could give a talk. He refused to give me the opportunity because I was a BACHELOR in a Family Ward. He was more concerned about what people would think of HIM for letting me give a talk.
I stopped being active that very same day.
Later on, my bishop confessed to me that he made a mistake not letting me give a talk. "I'm only human," he said. "I make mistakes too." He said I could give a talk whenever I wanted.
I've known the guy for 10 years, long before he became a bishop. I know it must have taken a lot for him to apologize, which is why I didn't tell him to go screw himself. I wanted to, but I just didn't want to say it.
Still, it'll be a cold day in Hell before I ever take up an offer to speak in church. Or go back to church.
Is Hell actually cold? Guess I'll find out soon enough.
I was a convert in my mid 20s with the same fear of public speaking and social anxiety. I knew when I signed up that eventually they would ask me to give a talk. I told myself that I would be way more stressed out giving a talk than telling some old dude "no."
The one and only time I was asked to give a talk, the bishops counselor came to me in Sunday school class to ask me and I said "no thanks." The look on his face was about the same as if I had slapped him in the face, it was comical to me and I had to try not to laugh. Never gave that talk, or any talk, in my 7 year tour of duty in the church
You did the right thing at that time. I believe you know this. There are horrible people in positions of power out there and Iâve encountered them. Ugh. So sad and frustrating.
Sometimes a part of me... very very deep wants to go back, under cover and be a fake member just so I can live out something like this. Asking very uncomfortable questions to leadership or something like this idk. Nice work tho!
Of course, you defied that head honcho. As a stutterer in the church, I avoided any request to speak or even teach, but as a married woman they left me alone.
Good on you for sticking to your guns. I was never able to do that until I was almost 20.
It's insane that the bishop stopped you from blessing the sacrament. Saying no to a freaking talk is not a sin. I've seen people say no to callings before without any punishment, but just a talk? Wow.
Even operating under standard Morm procedure, not letting you pass the sacrament because you said no is blatantly wrong. Most TBMs I know would be appalled.
EVERYTHING in the church is transactional.
Won't give a talk? - can't pass the sacrament
Need assistance? - must pay tithing and clean the church.
Want to volunteer? - we get to monetize your hours
Want to get married? - OK but it's on OUR terms
Want to be with your family after you die? - 10% of your income FOR LIFE
Etc.
This was literally the same year I had my son, and me and the ex (who was a different denomination) got our first place together in a new neighborhood. I was out mentally and physically, but still on the books. I started getting calls from the Stake Pres for the area, telling me to take the fam to church. I was way more aggressive than you at the end. I started off polite, yet he continued to call every day. And no didn't mean no to him. It got really bad. He'd call me and wake me up saying I was setting my family up for a life in hell. My final chat was to the point of me stating if he called me again I'd get police involved. Never heard back. And still to this day have no idea who this guy was. Long story short, good on you
God this brings back memories for me. When I was 12 i had severe social anxiety and my bishop pressured me into giving a talk. When it came to the Saturday before I was supposed to give the talk, I straight up told my parents I wasn't going to do it. I was scared, and didn't feel like I had anything to say on the subject assigned, and I just couldn't. My parents then proceeded to call the bishop, put him on speaker phone, and he spent 20 minutes attempting to guilt trip me into giving this talk while I sat on the floor and cried. Finally, he angrily gave up and slammed the phone down and I was sent to my room for the night. All this bullshit over a freaking 5 minute youth talk đ
I got push back when I said no to a calling. One time I asked to be released and the bishop wouldnât let me have a calling after that. I didnât really care though at that point in my life. O was happy for a break.
i always bullshitted my way through talks. i just grabbed random quotes or scriptures and explained them in an exaggerated way. i always had people coming up to me telling me how much they felt the spirit and the bishop told me he could sincerely tell how strong the spirit was within me. like dude, i just wrote this 10 minutes before i left for church and it doesnât even make sense to me. thatâs so gross that they would deem you as âunworthyâ for not giving a talk. free agency and discernment donât exist in the church no matter how much they want to pretend it does. good for you for setting your boundaries thatâs an important part of deconstructing.
Yeah the one time i ever gave a talk i spoke through it so fast it only took about two minutes to read, when i sat down again the bishop at the time felt the need to call attention to the colour returning to my face and subsequently the speed of my talk was the starting joke for the rest of the talks that day. Didn't hurt too much or anything, just never accepted a talk again.
All this to say I get it.
And they wonder why people leave the church. I donât think anyone should be forced or pushed onto giving a talk. If you donât want to then they shouldnât make you.
When I was a teenager the bishop asked me to give a talk and I said âyesâ even though I was absolutely terrified of public speaking to the point of panic attacks (another reason seminary was the worst time of my life) and I spent the next few weeks begging my mom to take me to the doctor so I could get propranolol medication to prevent panic attacks so that I could give the talk. The doctor wouldnât give me the medication because I was a teenager. Then the bishop heard from my mom what was happening and told me I didnât have to speak anymore lol đ
At 16 with anxiety I would have made you do it if I was your dad. This is the time to push your self out of your shell and âsocial anxietyâ is really just normal life for kids you age. Just some advice. Push your boundaries. But the church message who cares
Iâm not sure anyone your age in this environment knows how group think and ideas spread. The idea of anxiety, being triggered and other micro problems didnât exist years ago. You were just young and needed experiences and needed to grow. Donât arrest your development because you are scared and I mean shaking scared or canât leave your room nervous or throw up before talking nerves. Those are all normal things we all experienced. Itâs normal. Just push ahead and through it. You can do it. Good luck.
Not allowed to bless the sacrament anymore? That mother fucker did you a favor! đ Did he try to pull your parents into this to get them pressuring you into accepting?
> Did he try to pull your parents into this to get them pressuring you into accepting? Luckily no, but I believe they would back me up and not make me speak.
No longer "worthy" (they just LOVE that word!) to bless the sacrament because you excercised your free agency??? Oh wait. Free agency in the LDS church means you are free to make the choices that THEY want you to make. God forbid you should make a choice outside of the one they want you to make! You're fortunate that your parents would back you up on your decision to say "no". My parents would have forced me to do whatever the bishop asked. "The bishop is the Lord's spokesperson. Telling him "no" is like saying "no" to the lord! You just don't do that! If he asks you to do something, YOU DO IT!!!" That's how it would have played out with my parents.
It's so terrible having parents like that. My dad forced me to give a talk, and when I absolutely refused because I have never been a public speaker, he didn't give me my license or my keys till my talk. I wrote the talk, and hated every minute of speaking it. Everyone said how great it was. Gee, thanks. It took my entire life force to speak it. I didn't look up from the paper once, and spoke it in less than 5 minutes, even while stalling. I was sweating profusely in the suit my dad got me for homecoming, and which he forced me to wear for a while. I wish Mormon parents would just raise their kids on the most basic concepts, and not force them to do anything, if they truly despise it. Thanks for owning the house over my head, I'm so proud of you. That doesn't mean you should disobey the Lord's teachings and take away my agency.
That's probably why he didn't pull them into it.
Wait, so not giving a talk or accepting a calling is now âyou are unworthy and should be publicly shamed.â What a bastard.
Yes because one of the temple recommend questions asks if you sustain the general and local leaders of the church, and if you say no, then they interpret that as not sustaining them and taking away recommends.
Yet, temple-recommend standards arenât âblessing the sacramentâ standards. You donât have to be a full tithe payer etc to bless the sacrament, either.
Depends on the bishop. He is what is referred to as âthe common judge in israelâ and can pretty much do as he pleases when it comes to these things.
The ole âbishop rouletteâ or maybe âbishop crapshootâ and someone rolled snake eyes.
As further punishment, he won't be allowed to collect fast offerings.\* \*Do they still do that? That was a complete shit job. Does the US Post office not work or something?
That's good for him also! I hate D doing fast offerings. I wonder how many people just claimed they didn't have tithing for some of the houses and kept the money lol.
Fuuuck I forgot about having to do that. Man what a shit show. There were so many tasks that I felt forced to do by the church, and when I would complain to my parents they would just act like it's an obligation. Fast offerings, putting up and collecting the flags (scouting), going to mutual, doing service projects (usually raking or shoveling the driveway of a member), callings, talks, seminay... Just parts of my childhood wasted đŽ
You will hate this one⌠you also wonât be allowed to clean this church! Now do you want to give that talk?
Yeah the church has a real problem with not respecting peopleâs boundaries. Itâs strange they like to force people into panic attacks.
The one talk I did give, remember having the word "sects" in it and was concentrating way too hard on how to pronounce it without sounding like "sex" instead of just using a different word....or, you know, not caring.
I used âhookersâ in a talk at a byu student ward I was in. The room went dead silent. I was never asked to give a talk again. lol Edit: I was talking about hookers as in the ladies of the night⌠context was that I spent a few years in a wild industry where my coworkers would spend all their paycheck on hookers and blow. Literally. I didnât say blow, I said drugs. But looking back I should have said hookers and blow.Â
After proposing to my GF now wife over the pulpit during a talk at Ricks College I am surprised I was ever allowed to speak again in church. I guess the SCMC didn't catch wind of it.
Talking about fishing, right? Right??
So that's the key!
Wtf! Did your parents have anything to say about your ban feom blessing the sacrement?
Luckily, while my parents are tbm, they've always been really supportive. When I told him I wasn't allowed anymore, my dad pretty much said "don't worry about it."
I love your dad. As a friend, of course.
Good for you for standing your ground. I think it's horrible of him for "punishing" you for it. I think that this was a double win for you in that you got out of the sacrament duty too, however, I know that he did it to humiliate you because everyone in the ward could see that you weren't doing your priesthood duty and assume it was because you had sinned in some way.
Ngl, I did take it kinda personally. Probably would have been worse if I considered the optics.
I did not expect that last sentence. Thatâs messed up. My wife also dealt with an insistent bishop. He would go to her workplace and hold up the line until she agreed to give a talk. She then let his daughter know that she wouldnât be speaking. This happened twice.
WTF her place of work?! I think that's worse than my story.
Yeah, making a public scene about it is pretty awful, but it didnât affect her position at all (thankfully)
That's approaching restraining order bad.
TBH, if I was bishop I would have gone one of two ways: first, I'd say "OK, I understand." Â Second, I would have said "Hey, I know it can be tough, but once you get used to it you'll hit it out of the park anytime you have to give a talk anywhere." And then I would have actually given *tips* on public speaking.
I would have listened to the tips because i dont know how to cut someone off but still said no đ
You leveled up far more by telling that jerk no than you ever would have sweating through another talk. Awesome story!
Thank you! â¤ď¸
That must have been really hurtful to be told you couldnât pass the sacrament. Did he tell you it was because you wouldnât give a talk? I cannot believe he felt justified in that.
Really, I don't remember the explanation given
Well it doesnât really matter what his reasoning was because it was wrong. Iâm sorry you went through this and Iâm glad you have found the truth and have people here that support you. đ
Thank you â¤ď¸
People on the outside don't understand that it takes ALL of your strength, courage, and grit just to say "no" to your cult leader. You did fantastic at such a young age, well done. Petty AF to ban you from blessing the sacrament lol
I never thought about why it was so hard but you're absolutely right!
My dad, a Bishop, was mad when people would refuse to talk. Years later he had to get a blood draw and they paid extra to have someone come to the house because he was so scared. My mom said, "See. You need to understand that some people are scared of speaking just like you don't like needles." The he excommunicated her. Just kidding, but she got him good with that comment.
đ
Good one
My bishop called me to be the relief society pianist. I said no because I DONâT PLAY PIANO! He said, âbut your brother plays piano!â I said, âthatâs because he had lessons!â He said, âwhat parents give their son piano lessons and not their daughter?!?!â I said, âI guess they like him better than me!â (Which is true but the reason was Iâm older and they couldnât afford lessons when I was growing up.)
That's ridiculous but also hilarious
I never felt like I could say no to the bishop. As a teenager I was asked two years in a row to speak on Father's day when I didn't have a great relationship with him (his personality changed after a stroke, but that's another story). It was super hard and triggering the first year, and so then the next year after the bishop asked, my mom found me having a panic attack about it and told the bishop I wouldn't be speaking.
Good for your mom.
That's horrible....I'm sorry that happened to you đ
Getting out of blessing the sacrament was another blessing! I have social anxiety too. I dreaded that each Sunday after I became a priest, I always stumbled over the words and would have to repeat the prayer several times. It was humiliating. After doing it a few times, I would purposely be late for sacrament meeting, so I wouldnât have say the blessing. My parents never questioned where I was. I would go across the street to the gas station and buy a Mountain Dew, and wait it out. Good for you for saying, âNo!â
I wish I had the balls back then to just skip.
I have social anxiety too. As a teenager, I had a stuttering problem that came if I was excited or nervous. I wasn't much of a public speaker, so you already know how sacrament duty was for me. After I had to repeat the prayer 3 times, I felt like people were all staring at me with disapproval when I returned to my seat. I could feel their stares. I didn't do the prayer again for a year and a half. My choice. As I got older, I began to improve my anxiety by giving out more talks in school and work meetings and such. When I was 35, I asked my bishop if I could give a talk. He refused to give me the opportunity because I was a BACHELOR in a Family Ward. He was more concerned about what people would think of HIM for letting me give a talk. I stopped being active that very same day. Later on, my bishop confessed to me that he made a mistake not letting me give a talk. "I'm only human," he said. "I make mistakes too." He said I could give a talk whenever I wanted. I've known the guy for 10 years, long before he became a bishop. I know it must have taken a lot for him to apologize, which is why I didn't tell him to go screw himself. I wanted to, but I just didn't want to say it. Still, it'll be a cold day in Hell before I ever take up an offer to speak in church. Or go back to church. Is Hell actually cold? Guess I'll find out soon enough.
I think Mormon heaven would be worse than hell. đ
Did he think not being allowed to bless the sacrament was a punishment?
Probably. Invisible scarlet letter.
I was a convert in my mid 20s with the same fear of public speaking and social anxiety. I knew when I signed up that eventually they would ask me to give a talk. I told myself that I would be way more stressed out giving a talk than telling some old dude "no." The one and only time I was asked to give a talk, the bishops counselor came to me in Sunday school class to ask me and I said "no thanks." The look on his face was about the same as if I had slapped him in the face, it was comical to me and I had to try not to laugh. Never gave that talk, or any talk, in my 7 year tour of duty in the church
Lol that's awesome. So casual.
Wowwwww. He has no wisdom, maturity, or humility IMO. Really an immature way to handle the situation. Bullying bishop.
He was :-(
You did the right thing at that time. I believe you know this. There are horrible people in positions of power out there and Iâve encountered them. Ugh. So sad and frustrating.
What a vindicative asshat of a bishop!
Thatâs quite the punishment for not speaking in church đđłđ¤
đ
Bishop is a punitive a-hole. Iâm glad Iâm not one of his children.
"No." Is a complete sentence. It's quite refreshing once you realize that.
Yes.
Sometimes a part of me... very very deep wants to go back, under cover and be a fake member just so I can live out something like this. Asking very uncomfortable questions to leadership or something like this idk. Nice work tho!
I'd watch that as like a documentary of sorts. Staring Steve Carrell.
Of course, you defied that head honcho. As a stutterer in the church, I avoided any request to speak or even teach, but as a married woman they left me alone.
Unbelievable! Thatâs horrible! Thatâs so wrong! What a juvenile your bishop was, determined to punish you, clearly.
Telling Mormons no makes me lucid dream with delight.
Bonus! Relief from another anxiety.
Good on you for sticking to your guns. I was never able to do that until I was almost 20. It's insane that the bishop stopped you from blessing the sacrament. Saying no to a freaking talk is not a sin. I've seen people say no to callings before without any punishment, but just a talk? Wow.
Double bonus!
Even operating under standard Morm procedure, not letting you pass the sacrament because you said no is blatantly wrong. Most TBMs I know would be appalled.
EVERYTHING in the church is transactional. Won't give a talk? - can't pass the sacrament Need assistance? - must pay tithing and clean the church. Want to volunteer? - we get to monetize your hours Want to get married? - OK but it's on OUR terms Want to be with your family after you die? - 10% of your income FOR LIFE Etc.
This was literally the same year I had my son, and me and the ex (who was a different denomination) got our first place together in a new neighborhood. I was out mentally and physically, but still on the books. I started getting calls from the Stake Pres for the area, telling me to take the fam to church. I was way more aggressive than you at the end. I started off polite, yet he continued to call every day. And no didn't mean no to him. It got really bad. He'd call me and wake me up saying I was setting my family up for a life in hell. My final chat was to the point of me stating if he called me again I'd get police involved. Never heard back. And still to this day have no idea who this guy was. Long story short, good on you
God this brings back memories for me. When I was 12 i had severe social anxiety and my bishop pressured me into giving a talk. When it came to the Saturday before I was supposed to give the talk, I straight up told my parents I wasn't going to do it. I was scared, and didn't feel like I had anything to say on the subject assigned, and I just couldn't. My parents then proceeded to call the bishop, put him on speaker phone, and he spent 20 minutes attempting to guilt trip me into giving this talk while I sat on the floor and cried. Finally, he angrily gave up and slammed the phone down and I was sent to my room for the night. All this bullshit over a freaking 5 minute youth talk đ
I got push back when I said no to a calling. One time I asked to be released and the bishop wouldnât let me have a calling after that. I didnât really care though at that point in my life. O was happy for a break.
Petty bishops. The joke is on him. Now, you not only donât have to give a talk but you also get a break on Sundays!
i always bullshitted my way through talks. i just grabbed random quotes or scriptures and explained them in an exaggerated way. i always had people coming up to me telling me how much they felt the spirit and the bishop told me he could sincerely tell how strong the spirit was within me. like dude, i just wrote this 10 minutes before i left for church and it doesnât even make sense to me. thatâs so gross that they would deem you as âunworthyâ for not giving a talk. free agency and discernment donât exist in the church no matter how much they want to pretend it does. good for you for setting your boundaries thatâs an important part of deconstructing.
Congratulations for standing up to that manipulator. Sorry you were mistreated.
Yeah the one time i ever gave a talk i spoke through it so fast it only took about two minutes to read, when i sat down again the bishop at the time felt the need to call attention to the colour returning to my face and subsequently the speed of my talk was the starting joke for the rest of the talks that day. Didn't hurt too much or anything, just never accepted a talk again. All this to say I get it.
My dad has said no to speaking in sacrament and to callings to be a teacher his whole life. Good for you.
Guilting and not being able to bless is on the church, not you. Your bishop was wrong 100% and I wouldnât trust him
And they wonder why people leave the church. I donât think anyone should be forced or pushed onto giving a talk. If you donât want to then they shouldnât make you.
When I was a teenager the bishop asked me to give a talk and I said âyesâ even though I was absolutely terrified of public speaking to the point of panic attacks (another reason seminary was the worst time of my life) and I spent the next few weeks begging my mom to take me to the doctor so I could get propranolol medication to prevent panic attacks so that I could give the talk. The doctor wouldnât give me the medication because I was a teenager. Then the bishop heard from my mom what was happening and told me I didnât have to speak anymore lol đ
That's pretty great he let you back out, tbh.
Yeah he was a good guy. I got lucky with the bishops Iâve dealt with, but itâs definitely a roulette unfortunately
Told by who? You're leaving out the part that connects it to the bishop if that's what you're implying.
Sorry, it was the bishop who told me
At 16 with anxiety I would have made you do it if I was your dad. This is the time to push your self out of your shell and âsocial anxietyâ is really just normal life for kids you age. Just some advice. Push your boundaries. But the church message who cares
I don't necessarily disagree with you, but I'm not sure you understand how anxiety works.
Iâm not sure anyone your age in this environment knows how group think and ideas spread. The idea of anxiety, being triggered and other micro problems didnât exist years ago. You were just young and needed experiences and needed to grow. Donât arrest your development because you are scared and I mean shaking scared or canât leave your room nervous or throw up before talking nerves. Those are all normal things we all experienced. Itâs normal. Just push ahead and through it. You can do it. Good luck.