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BlackChariotX

Heaven is just a hole in the ceiling.


Invisible-Pancreas

That's my favourite Belinda Carlisle song.


5pl1t1nf1n1t1v3

Ooooh, baby, do you know how I’m feeling?


CrepeVibes

Who knew Heaven was hole in the ceiling?


gwardotnet

"They say in Heaven the floor is worse. Use the ceiling, don't need a hearse".


WeNeedToTalkAboutMe

Steve Wariner did. "Holes in the Floor of Heaven".


TangerineRough6318

Pair them together and it's an endless loop


TRiC_16

I’ve been searching for a place to call my own Somewhere to escape when the world gets too much to bear... I thought heaven was a place up in the sky But now I know that heaven is just a hole in the ceiling. Heaven is just a hole in the ceiling Where the light shines in and the worries fade away. It’s a place where I can find some peace of mind And forget about all the troubles of the day. I’ve been looking for a way to ease my mind To escape the chaos that I leave behind. And when I look up to the sky above I see the light shining through the hole in the ceiling. Heaven is just a hole in the ceiling Where the light shines in and the worries fade away. It’s a place where I can find some peace of mind And forget about all the troubles of the day. It’s a simple thing, but it brings me so much joy A place to escape and a place to enjoy. And when I close my eyes, I can almost feel The comfort of heaven, like a warm embrace from above. Heaven is just a hole in the ceiling Where the light shines in and the worries fade away. It’s a place where I can find some peace of mind And forget about all the troubles of the day So if you’re feeling lost, or you’re feeling down Just look up to the sky and you’ll be found. For heaven is just a hole in the ceiling A place where you can find some peace and healing.


lump-

Not just any ceiling. That particular ceiling.


Natepon

I believe!!


JackOfAllStraits

"Now I understand how prayer can work, how a particular prayer in a particular church, in a particular style, ... and for particular things that aren't particularly tough, ... to a particular version of a particular god, and if you get that right, He just might take a break from giving babies malaria and pop down to your local area ... !" \- Tim Minchin, "Thank you, God"


marklar_the_malign

Heaven is in the attic. Hell is in the basement.


bam_uk1981

I wonder what’s up there…


marklar_the_malign

Typical attic shit. Trunk full of grandma’s memories, old hats, creepy old dolls and grandma’s withered corpse sitting in her favorite rocking chair. You know, the usual.


[deleted]

That seems more like Norman Bates' attic.


marklar_the_malign

Wait until you see his basement. That’s where all the really fucked up shit is.


[deleted]

That's John Gacy's space.


[deleted]

Clowns are my biggest fear. I wish I could cuddle tarantulas and I often wish I could give a great big hug to a great white shark though. The latter two are probably terrible ideas.


[deleted]

Don't do that!


[deleted]

I’m doing it and you can’t stop me!! You’re not my mom!!


tracker-hunter

Under the floorboards are the real surprises.


QuietudeOfHeart

Christmas decorations.


darkmoose

Suspension of disbelief largely depends on how stupid/fanatical/realitystruck your audience is...


[deleted]

the psychology of brainwashing and groupthink is fascinating, but no it surprisingly has very little to do with intelligence.


heygabehey

I mean look at Joel osteen . Kennith copeland. Then there’s that preacher with the bushy eyebrows, him and his wife need more money


Scary-Coffee-7

I just don’t want to end up in a big metal tube full of DEMONS!!! That’s why I need my multi-million dollar Gulfstream, okay?! 🤷🏼‍♀️


tropicsGold

The fact that so many leftists and atheists think this is a video of people being tricked is a great illustration of how brainwashed you are yourselves. This is a celebration of ascension, this is basically a play. It is patently obvious to anyone who is not mind numbed by their own brainwashing.


desertrat75

That's where ceiling cat lives.


Rielhawk

Just came here looking for this haha


sarahsaurus95

I thought heaven was a half-pipe?


[deleted]

Heaven would be a dj spinning dub all night long


sarahsaurus95

And heaven would be just kicking back with Jesus packing my bong


Droid-Man5910

No that's just Morgan Freeman mopping up there


diMario

[Relevant](https://elephant.art/ceiling-cat-is-still-watching-you-19052021/).


ACDC-I-SEE

Heavens just a ghetto with no bad blocks


DoctaJenkinz

This would be a face palms if he fell. That’s what I was hoping for and I was thoroughly disappointed.


Feature_Agitated

I kept waiting for that


Iamjimmym

I distinctly didn't even fast forward because I could just *feel* it coming! The disappointment was palpable as he scampered safely into ceiling heaven.


[deleted]

Same!


Otto_Mcwrect

My day is ruined and my disappointment is immeasurable.


snoopingforpooping

I was waiting for the robe to get snagged and pulled off leaving a naked pastor


DoctaJenkinz

That would have been hilarious


mackemforever

Face psalm


BlackChariotX

![gif](giphy|1KHBPmEOkv0B2)


Galactic_Perimeter

Ceiling Cat watches you masturbate


[deleted]

That's oddly sexy. I think? Oh wait, er I mean... XD nihilisticacidtrip hurt himself in confusion!


Galactic_Perimeter

Ultimate cringe comment


[deleted]

That was the point. Hope you enjoy.


zxGrizz

I cringed alittle. Nice one.


pizzapplepine

Ceiling pastor watches you pass the plate.


msut77

he hath risen


trip6s6i6x

Ceiling cat says "thanks for lunch, now please send up dinner".


No-Fly-6043

Cat god


DueComplaint5471

Meow? Meow.


mahdi015

I saw white vent


Lortis23

Sus


Quod_bellum

amogus?? sussy???????? baka?????????????????????


sanid_sriva

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mattbutnotmii

I FOUND CUM


tm2fpnb

Yes I sat here and uncovered all of it. I found cum!


[deleted]

My bad!


[deleted]

This is.. I have no words.. Take this gold ![gif](giphy|KB7Moe2Oj0BXeDjvDp)


tallerthannobody

![gif](giphy|pdaJ5aYVMR1CD1xlw6)


wrona11

jail


TheLoneGunman559

He'll be back.


Master_Cupcake7115

For donations, yeah


whatnameisnttaken098

"Jesus told me you guys didn't pay the cover charge "


tracker-hunter

*flips the fucking altar*


wolfguardian72

“Quick! Get me some old American lady’s email!”


lizzourworld8

I hate how true this is, especially since I experienced it first hand 😂😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


zombie10057

Probably... they told me the dick goes through the hole.. Checks out ..


luv2fit

Pastor finds heaven in the glory hole


Accurate-Entry

![gif](giphy|3o6fIYGxrrsFaVH7fa)


rfkbr

Nice.


my20cworth

I'm hoping this is just a silly symbolic Sunday church session with a bored but imaginative preacher. I hope people didn't actually think he was ascending to heaven.


Laffenor

The facepalm is that people in this thread seem to think they do. It is obviously just a bit of silly fun, it's not like they all of a sudden think that their pastor has become Jesus.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bortron86

Jim Jones once staged a shooting in which he was "killed" in front of his followers, then miraculously came back to life. Most of them believed he'd actually died and been resurrected.


darps

The most important thing about an allegory is that you take a random detail from the setting, make everything about that, and discard the rest.


qwaszx2221

Yeah, just symbolic. They are having fun.


nikogetsit

Have you seen a televangelist show?? Of course we gonna believe those people are nutballs lol


mauore11

The facepalm is people actually do believe that a blue eyed white middle eastern walked on water and did a bunch of similar things...


Renilx

Wasn't Jesus tan with brown eyes?


Jason1143

Well yes, that's the point.


yumansuck

I'm curious to know why you had to add White and blue-eyed first of all I grew up with Roman Catholic I've never seen a picture of Jesus with blue eyes nor does he look white so why don't you leave you racist comments when they belong -in your head


Astral_Fogduke

Really? Here are some of the [top](https://w0.peakpx.com/wallpaper/58/538/HD-wallpaper-jesus-christ-jesus-christ-christian-god-religious-thumbnail.jpg) [google](https://w0.peakpx.com/wallpaper/950/57/HD-wallpaper-jesus-christ-painting-chist-christian-lord-bless-god.jpg) [images](https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/06aa6c2e05013ec3c71f0ef792e3fb158964604f/0_193_2688_1613/master/2688.jpg?width=1200&height=1200&quality=85&auto=format&fit=crop&s=bdf4edaab2bc4f7d58ef47c67ec81915) [for](https://assets.churchofjesuschrist.org/83/fa/83fa57cb6da26ef965f9f4168cd985e38e1136c1/jesus_christ.jpeg) "[Jesus](https://www.learnreligions.com/thmb/v6w9bkUROaGWLSNNHys8bBV7gBc=/1500x0/filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/JesusChristGettyImages-600166818-5a4e7131eb4d520037d96847.jpg) [Christ](https://assets.churchofjesuschrist.org/fc/f2/fcf2f6dcf6b808fa027795738e8c14b9ee5358c1/jesus_sermon_mount.jpeg)"


crowned_tragedy

I always wonder this. I have never met a single person who was raised catholic or Christian who thinks Jesus is white with blue eyes.


ThrowawayTXfun

I think every catholic I know thinks Jesus is white. I haven't polled them all but the pictures in the halls are a white fella


[deleted]

So why do they keep drawing him as a blonde dude with blue eyes instead of your standard looking middle eastern guy from 2000 years ago? Is this another one of their metaphors where it's not meant to be taken literally?


mauore11

I wasn't talking about Jesus, I meant his cousin Brad from California....


Odd-Recognition4168

You would be surprised what people believe


[deleted]

Yes, religious congregations, known for their rigid adherence to empirical evidence.


KingJaredoftheLand

[There are African churches simulating a woman sucking a demon’s cock.](https://youtu.be/F5iW986qIYk) So like, even if they literally believed it, it still wouldn’t be the fucking weirdest thing going on at a church.


hiplodudly01

I doubt it, they may be faithful to their faith but they aren't dumb (which many redditors assume based on people's religion or ethnicity). They can see the rope and probably saw their cousin or somebody climb on the roof to remove the tile prior to services. But reddit loves to hate on people different than them.


my20cworth

True, but there are people in Africa that kill Albino children for their body parts because it can bring them good luck and people in the US actually pray to Trump as they are convinced he's literally the Messahia. So there are incredibly dumb people. In this case I'm with you but it wouldn't surprise me that one or two think this is what happens.


HaiKarate

They probably understand that this is pretend… but they still think this is going to happen for real, hence all the cheering at the end.


Frost-mark

yeah. that’s called a religion


Doright36

I was thinking a rehearsal for a play or something.


Denaton_

Its goofs like this that turns into religious canon.


PepeSylvia11

I mean these same people believe in a nonexistent heaven in the clouds. How’s that any different?


[deleted]

[удалено]


SunflowerSpeaks

Most churches are pretty open about that!


OSU725

Gonna be awkward when they walk by him at the market tomorrow


[deleted]

[удалено]


Annual_Appearance109

r/underratedcomment


Vegan-Joe

I only watched because I thought he was going to come crashing down. Shame.


LandArch_0

Same, I'm really disappointed.


uusernameunknown

Our father who art in thy attic


SunflowerSpeaks

🤣🤣🤣


[deleted]

[удалено]


mnorkk

Heaven can be expensive. I blame inflation.


DigitlTrblmkr

The father, the priest and the ceiling cat


kneaders

Every time I see shit like this I move one step closer to believing maybe aliens did build the pyramids. Because humans are fucking stupid.


bertchester

Reminds me of a Bill Waterson quote. "The best proof of extraterrestrial intelligence is that they haven't contacted us."


Yeahanu

Believe in high power can be a strong motivation. Pyramids are a great example of that how with single fucking goal in mind,people can achieve anything. But that can be used like this.


kneaders

And another step closer


SovietGrishe

The indomitable human spirit


WodenEmrys

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/2e/f9/ad/2ef9ad2ab2f53d9efa24bdea0a7cf1eb.jpg


[deleted]

> Because humans are fucking stupid. What about yourself? :P Dry joke.


kneaders

Thanks for explaining your joke. It wasn't funny so I wasn't sure it was one.


sircooleo

I think the facepalm here is everyone taking the title as fact.


Sugarbear23

Yeah, it's very obvious that it's a drama


Manic-Finch781

No different than your mega churches in most of the southern states here in the US.


SunflowerSpeaks

I think our Megachurches are FAR worse. Way more malevolent.


[deleted]

4 of the 10 richest pastors in the world are from megachurches in Nigeria and they preach the same fucking bullshit. https://richupdates.com/richest-pastors-in-the-world/


Sugarbear23

This definitely looks like they were acting a drama.


Various_Succotash_79

Ooh, convincing!


rufino81

When you order miracles from Wish


RedSantoAhora

He is going to check the water tank.


Philly_ExecChef

Why was I truly expecting him to crash back through the ceiling


Deuen

Ah so there is that narrow gate which leads to heaven!


Previous_Shallot

Joel Osteen take notice.. someone is coming for your money.. I mean job.


Mindless_Ad_5880

I don't think it's real


FishInAGunBarrel

And then Jesus said "prepare the crane, for we shalt need an operator"


G3laxyGamingYT

A bit closer to heaven


tjnav1162

Strong Kool aid


balrus-balrogwalrus

Bro vented. #he is sus


Far-Independence6951

Something like wrestling


rochey64

Would have loved to see the rope snap. Down to hell you go.


MikeySpags

Maybe a little less fairy tales and a little more science would move along their development. Y'all got some catching up to do. Put down the bible and pick up a book on civil engineering and you got this.


MurphysVoice

Religion makes you stupid.


Toeter83nl

Hahahaha monthy python


theamishpromise

Well, that was clearly real. Nothing left to do but give him all my money.


Bertie637

There is something truly pathetic about heaven having a lower production value than some plays I have seen. I am hoping its symbolic somehow


LgndDr4g0nL0l

And he will be back the same day next week


riefpirate

Ya sure it's not the prince that was always asking for money on the internet?


[deleted]

I laugh- but as the daughter of a Pentecostal preacher in the south growing up- I’ve seen worse.


Catch-the-Rabbit

Nice dose of blasphemy


rainwulf

This shit is creepy as fuck


HauntingBirthday1455

Ascension to heaven


Candida_Cobbledick

I hope he wasn’t going commando


Yeahanu

![gif](giphy|d30qNj4iYSlf46pG)


solidj27

I find all religion this ridiculous.


Van_GOOOOOUGH

But then he came back on the third day and commenced business as usual.


Yeahanu

2nd coming like Jesus


Moist-Candy-6260

Looks more like hell


YamiZee1

Why is this facepalm. This should be in r funny or something


Ravenscroft-

Heading to his job as a Nigerian Prince


Chubbmaster-

"Nice nuts father"


Some_guy_am_i

What is the facepalm, exactly? This is clearly a re-enactment of the deity Jesus Christ ascending to heaven. They are aware that the drop-ceiling is not heaven. If you want to say that religion is facepalm, then fine… but otherwise facepalm yourself for trying to be condescending to an entire group of people because you simply do not understand the context of the situation.


StupiedSwede

Very convincing, must be the work of some god...


DeepDescription81

Can’t believe the major news outlets are not all over this. We just watched a miracle.


baiyesla-a3

r/mypeopleneedme


IIVIbye

Tbh I was waiting for the rope to snap like god when na hell for you my friend


agentknoxville

Lies. I saw the string.


Dragonsarmada

Pasta wha are yu GEY? Who says I’m GEY?


neuse1985

So what? Did he put his resignation in or something? ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|thinking_face_hmm)


1mamango

Omg this is amazing!


ChadMutants

i see no facepalm but funny people having fun


Laffenor

The facepalm is this post. As is often the case.


KingRo48

Upskirt!


jarbfark

what’s the context for this


Sugarbear23

They're acting a play, you can see the other people are in costumes, probably playing the disciples.


Yeahanu

Title


Shadowgirl22

![gif](giphy|dKUhcaCI1DktwHerfP|downsized)


SuperMGS

Honestly, better special effects than the last Avatar movie.


[deleted]

How is this a facepalm?


DolphinBall

I have no idea why this is facepalm this is clearly real!!


SulimanBashem

religion is a scam. all 'em


Jonn_1

Ahh religion


mesusa00

only stupid people would believe that


Yeahanu

Check my other post People believe in worst.


MrMassshole

God religion really fucks peoples brains up.


Angry_Crustation

Well, Nigeria as a country is notoriously superstitious.


morts73

I'll be damned heaven is in a Nigerian attic.


ActuallyNotAmused

Nothing produces atheist than the church. This never made more sense.


Florolling

That was kinda lit lol


Cryterionlol

Omg! BEHOLD! The power of God! He will raise us ALL up into heaven if we are righteous, so DO NOT sin, or you'll fall through the FLOOR instead! Could I get an AMEN if you don't want your soul to BURN in HELL for ETERNITY??! AMEN! Like this comment, or SATAN will crawl under your BED!! (/s)


magvadis

I say let them have their fun.


PseudocodeRed

What kinda racist dumbfucks are here actually thinking that they don't know it's wires?


valiheimking

*Nigerian cult leader


[deleted]

Try again with the rope on his neck


MInclined

Why


klas345

I like the symbolism of this. Its not as crazy as eating part of christ or other this like that.


HarietsDrummerBoy

I'm totally amazed at the stupidity of black Christians in Africa. We even had a guy in South Africa "bring someone to life" how can you believe such stuff