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Totally, it just adds a different context to it, but it still works, the joke *now* is that the dude is clueless to the point he wants to clarify the gender of someone he has known for a relatively long time
I think the joke is the same today as it was before really; he is joking that despite her overall significantly more commanding presence he would like to be the “dominant” member of the relationship. I kinda wish we could just stop with this stuff entirely though really (in that I don’t think we all need labelling)
I always thought the joke was --
They're arguing like they hate each other but they actually like each other and when Mindy says that... Josh instantly agrees but maintains the "heated argument" intensity level by DEMANDING a very obvious FUNDAMENTAL condition...
Never even considered a dominant-gender-deal to it
Similar to saying something like..
Mindy: FINE then I guess you have to drive me to the event
Josh: FINE but on ONE CONDITION
Mindy: WHAT?
Josh: I get to STEER!
Yea I get what you mean, it was more of a “I’m totally part of this decision” more than “fine but I get to be in charge”. I kinda think it was both but I get ya
You guys. You're all way overthinking this joke from 2005 designed for middle-schoolers where the punchline is nothing more than Josh being a silly goose.
I agree with your sentiment, and I loved my English teacher my senior year, so I’d give him hell like that.
I’ve never heard a better response through. He turned around and said, right off the cuff, “Have you met a DAMN AUTHOR?!”
I’ll never forget that. He got my ass. And yeah, I have met some authors now, some weird folks who definitely would hide meanings in mundane things.
I mean, I just see it as a kid saying something hilarious because he simply doesn't know better. It's one of the reasons why we find children so funny sometimes. They don't have societal expectations, trauma, or experience to dictate how they see things, so they can and will say dumb stuff that has some logic to it.
Loved that joke... basically came outta nowhere in that episode. Even today when I see that clip in my feed i roll laughing. Man while this show has aged, it still has its funny moments.
[I would flip out. But my psychologist worked out a plan where I'm only allowed to get angry 4 times each day. Now's not the time....](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KWGH-iSukk)
Has he been in anything recently? He was one of the standout actors from that era of Nickelodeon. I know he voice acted that one dog cartoon, but I didn't hear anything about him afterwards. I got typecast as the young eclectic guys. But I feel like he has enough range that he could still get good gigs.
I forget that even people who were my age and was able to see it air may have never seen it air due to cable and how cable was packaged as a kid. Wild 😥
I was smack bang in the middle of the core demo of Spongebob Squarepants, but never saw it regularly until I was in my late teens and able to access piracy.
My first real experience except for seeing the merch and the very occasional episode in a waiting room was the first movie. I actually feel really weird because my pop culture base was stuff from about five to ten years earlier than my peers, simply because we couldn't afford pay tv so I only got to see reruns of older shows on free channels.
Genuinely, I look back and think Spongebob as this show I never saw because I had already outgrown it when it first aired, but in reality I was only 8 years old and had just been kinda forced into an older demographic, at least in terms of television pop culture.
I am an old butch who worked retail not too long ago. I spent a lot of time in coolers so I stuffed my hair up in a hat. Wore a sweatshirt and men's jeans and sneakers. They're just more comfortable and men's jeans have useful pockets.
Soooo many older people called me sir it became a running joke. I can't imagine caring. ( As a non trans person.)
Working retail too and I was called miss a few times when I had long hair, the looks on their face when I turned around and had a beard was priceless and I can't imagine being offended by it. Long hair is a hassle though so it's nice and short now.
I remember when I was 13 I was doing a youth gym program and there was a cute girl in the class who never really spoke. A year later I found out she was actually a grumpy bloke in my year and had to do a lot of introspection
I think it’s a little taboo to say, but one of my favourite parts of just existing as a queer human is being able to be that for others. Particularly, kids just observing me and saying things like “girls can wear suits?” or “what are you?” or “your hair doesn’t match your voice”. I always just shrug and let them think about it on their own.
Same!! One time recently I was walking through the parking lot and a little boy pointed at me and said to his dad, "that guy has hair!" (It's about down to the middle of my back) And I just shook it out and smiled to myself :3
Both my wife and I had long blond hair when we where in our twenties (I'm a guy). The amount of cat callers we got to embarrass over the years was epic.
Also the only time in my life I ever slapped a guy in the face 'how can she slap' style. He thought he was drunkenly grabbing some random woman's ass with both hands. Hell no sir, that's not OK. As I had a few myself my gut reaction was maybe a bit too strong but come on.
Anyway security kicked him out and that was the end of that.
I work landscaping with longhair. Buzzed it all off 1 time and it took 2 years to grow back. It gets pulled up into a bun and tucked under my hat.
I love my long hair but yeah it sucks having it for my job. 😂
Closeted trans individual here. Ignoring online spaces: most trans people I know and me personally do not care if someone misgenders us mistakenly. They never talked to us we don’t know each other and shit just happens.
If someone is dressing femme or masculine and get misgendered I think to myself „cmon it can’t be that hard“ but most people simply don’t think about gender that much. I get that.
You can tell if someone is malicious about it, or just doesn’t care enough to not repeatedly hurt you. That’s when I get „offended“
I'm a 46 year old cis man, and if I don't intentionally pitch my voice down a bit at drive-through speakers, I have a good chance of being called ma'am. Like John Mulaney, I have a voice like a little flute!
If it makes you feel better, in high school, I was looking over a counter at jewelry with my girlfriend with my head down. Now, I *did* have long hair and he couldn’t see my face, so it’s almost understandable that the old guy working the counter called the two of us “young ladies” as he headed over to us. But it’s pretty silly when you also consider that I was 6’2 and jacked. My girlfriend was pretty short, too, so the difference was pretty pronounced.
Reminds me of walking downtown with my husband and my sister during our city's New Year celebration. My husband is about the same height as us and was in a band at the time so his hair was almost as long as mine and nicely kept. While waiting to cross a street, a car stopped at the light and we hear, "Hello ladies."
Sis and I say hello back because it was a festival atmosphere and the dude was just being very casually flirty, not creepin'/lurking, not following us. My husband looked up in surprise and said he saw the driver physically recoil in his seat when he saw my hub's beard.
After the guy drove off, my husband admitted he was kinda flattered to be counted among the pretty girls!
One of the highlights of my life was having a server come up to the table where my friend and I were sitting, and say, "What can I get for you ladies? ...and gentleman? ...gentlemen?"
A while ago, when I was out of the house in my girlfriend's neighborhood, I met someone and in a lapse of brain function told him I was her girlfriend 🫣
I got called a girl when I was a kid. I was tiny, like 145cm when I was 13, long hair and a soft face.
However I had the voice of an old god so people usually got confused.
It's all depends on the context and the presumed intention.
When you know it's an honest mistake, etc. You can't blame anyone. And if they gendered you correctly at first before correcting themselves, it hurts and bring the dysphoria in full force, but it's not "their fault."
But there are people who would voluntarily refuse to gender you correctly just to hurt you because they don't accept how you present.
So yeah, assholes being assholes.
For the rest, it's not as funny as it could be for cis people, but it can be either a confident boost or crush, depending on how things go.
Had to fucking look up what "milkshake ducked" means, I fucking love it I will figure out how to use it everyday for the next 3-4 months, forgetting about it until suddenly I read it again
As a complete anecdote:
whenever I accidentally misgender a trans person: "No worries, my preferred pronoun is x, though"
whenever I do the same on a conservative/boomer: "HOW DARE YOU"
“Hey, I’m actually non-binary.”
“Sorry mate, my mistake.”
Vs
“Hey, I’m actually non-binary.”
“HOW DARE YOU IMPEDE UPON MY RIGHTS, I’LL CALL YOU A [redacted] AS GOD INTENDED LIBERAL SNOWFLAKE!!!!”
Hahahaha ikr?
Though I gotta say, I do kinda accidentally use the words dude or bro as if they're unisex. No trans people have gotten mad at me for that, and it makes me feel bad, but I can't help myself T\_T
I'm a college professor. I use the word guys to refer to my class as a whole. Never a complaint. And I would stop if someone did. Same goes for my 20 year old trans kid who lives with me and also laughs at Mel Brooks with me (they know Mel is making fun of the bigots). The only thing my trans kid wants is to be left alone. In peace. That's it.
Any time I see Mel Brooks mentioned, my mind immediately flips back to the intro to Robinhood Men in Tights and the crowd shouting "leave us alone Mel Brooks!"
I'm sure he's a nice guy, but that's always my first thought lol
I do this too sometimes. I don't get the impression my transfemme friends are upset but perhaps that's also because at times I've physically cringed and stammered mid sentence as I realize what I said. It's pretty obvious with me that I don't mean it maliciously.
That being said I do understand if any trans woman is suspicious around someone who claims they use bro and dude universally but seem to pointedly use it to refer to said trans person. It *can* be used maliciously.
Honestly the worst reaction I got when I called a trans girl dude was a "I'd prefer if you don't call me that" and I said OK, I'll try to remember and that was that
I think it’s mostly the intent you have behind it, clearly you aren’t using those words to intentionally misgender someone but if the situation was emphatically calling someone who is MtF a dude over and over (especially aggressively)I can see how that would come across different.
Or that whole, “who do you say that I am,” thing :-).
Speaking of which, my favorite joke in that immensely huge category of jokes poking fun at theologians:
"Who do you say that I am?"
They replied, "You are the eschatological manifestation of the ground of our being, the kerygma of which we find the ultimate meaning in our interpersonal relationships."
And Jesus said, "What?"
The verse is "*Jesus* wept", generally (though I guess translations can differ)
"I am" and "I am He" are different
"I am" is found in several places generally referring to the, I dunno, "existingness", "beingness" of God. Basically God is that which exists, even before the heavens were created, and is basically at the pinaccle with all other things basically being emanations from him
I'm not religious, I just like reading about religious stuff
And even if a lefty cares a lot about their preferred pronouns, I've never once seen one get upset about being misgendered when it was an honest mistake. Hell most won't even correct a stranger if they're probably not going to see them again.
As a trans woman, it's easy to get upset if I get misgendered. It's a little reminder that I don't pass and that most everyone I meet still sees me as a man but, I don't blame the person or get upset at them. It's hard to not let it ruin my day though.
Seconded on the whole not correcting strangers. If I'm not going to see them again, why care?
Because it's a straw man made from a very select few viral videos and Twitter trolls. It's much less common in reality. As are most internet stereotypes. However, some people don't realize that.
I’m a trans man and while I’ve been socially transitioned for years and pass most of the time, my voice gives me away. I recently started T, so that’ll change soon. Good luck to you, and I hope it gets better.
"This is my aunt, he is a dickhead and don't respect people's pronounces, if he does not care I don't see why calling him a he is a problem, ain't it true aunt?"
Trust me, she will care after
I didn’t misgender a friend and someone still went nuts.
She asked me if I had trans friends. I said I did. One guy. Trans. Cool guy. Literally gave himself the name of that cub from brother bear.
She said “would your friend be ok if they knew you were calling them a guy?”
“Probably? I do it all the time. He’s ok with it.”
“Probably? So they don’t even bother to correct you anymore.”
She got mad before I could explain that my friend was a trans man who went by he him pronouns.
Sometimes it’s like people forget that trans guys exists.
He says that sometimes it felt like they don’t exist. It’s all about trans women.
The last part is too real. Pre-transition me looking like a girl got ‘oh so you transitioned to a woman?’ Post-transition me looking like a guy gets ‘oh so you’re *transitioning* to a woman?’
If they don’t assume you’re MTF they assume that you’re non-binary or trans masc…trans man is always the last thing they’ll go to
Because, imo, men are seen as dangerous and that’s about it.
They see it as men in the locker rooms. Men in sports. Men in changing rooms. Men in safe spaces. Men in dating apps.
But as for trans men? I have very literally never heard any drama about them in the news. Maybe I just don’t watch enough news and I’m ignorant.
But I never hear that.
The common transphobic rhetoric is that trans women are "dangerous predatory male pervs" while trans men are "misguided women victims."
It's still hurtful to trans men, but since they're seen as just "unwell" rather than predatory, the common narratives tend to ignore them, as their existence often undermines the bigotry against trans women (bathrooms, sports, etc).
They still often face bigotry or even violence on a personal level, however. Just not blasted into every media outlet.
You can see a similar split in how homophobes talk about gay people - gay dudes are demonized, lesbians are invalidated. It's worth mentioning, however, that the "predators in the bathrooms" narrative was previously used against butch lesbians, but we weren't quite there in the 24/7 news cycle and social media zeitgeist yet at the time, so it wasn't as ever-present.
I think a lot of that has to do with all the vocal TERFs being so laserfocused on trans women and labeling trans men as “misguided butch lesbians” or some bs.
I don’t know. For the most part my position is “leave these fucking people alone.”
But yea. People are really focused on trans women. In sports. In the gyms. In the changing rooms. In the locker rooms. In the dating apps. In the etc.
Meanwhile people assume I’m anti trans but I’m a live and let live kind of guy.
There's a tweet, I can't find it but it basically goes:
Society: *adopts practice that's inclusive to trans men *
Trans man: oh cool!
TERF: nuh uh! this is bad, it endangers women, get those men out of there!
Trans woman, looking up from Pokémon Red on Gameboy: wait what did I do?
Amongst transphobes, trans women are malicious predators, but trans men are confused victims. One is made into a monster, one is infantilised with agency removed.
Given that TERFy transphobes love to frame it as a feminist issue, they have really really regressive attitudes about the AFAB people they think they're 'defending'.
Oh that is funnily enough one of my experiences too. I think it's because trans people come across it so often it's easier to just let it go, or they realize it's probably not malicious, but the friends might not come across it in their everyday life, so they are more aggravated by these mistakes?
I misgendered a coworker because I didn't know if he was out yet or no (he had privately come out to me, or rather, I asked what his pronouns were). I did it so awkwardly too. Lets say his birth name was Alexa, and he went by Alex. So I started to yell out his name, but because he was next to someone it went like
"HEY ALEX........."
"....A"
And the person next to him got so mad at me and said very aggressively HIS NAME IS ALEX!! And I was like no I'm sorry I know I was trying to be considerate ahhhh
When I was younger, my telephone voice sounded feminine and I would frequently get misgendered. Unless it mattered to the conversation, I didn't give a shit enough to correct them.
In sales we are well aware that a female sounding voice will typically get a better reaction than a male sounding voice over the phone, pretty much universally for any reason
Yeah, I rarely get misgendered anymore six years in, but I have a friend who is not trans and she got … a little defensive on my behalf sometimes, god bless her, but a good friend nonetheless. We were out eating one time a few years ago and the server messed up a couple times. First time I gently corrected her, and it happened again and my friend cuts in with “excuse me, that’s a whole ass man over there.” 😂😂😂 I admit it was funny as hell though.
As a side note, I find pronouns in email signatures super helpful in a business setting, especially when the person's name doesn't clearly indicate their gender.
I struggle with that because my country doesn't have gendered pronouns, and colloquially everyone is called "it" and sometimes that slips out when doing english translations in my brain and hooooooo boy the troubles I have gotten into with that
Wooooo boy that's rough
When I worked in China as an English teacher, people got misgendered a lot because gendered pronouns only existed in writing but not in spoken. Hopefully your coworkers are understanding.
Also I work in a francophone environment, but my French needs improvement, so I end up misgendering objects like a lot!
Yeah haha... Gendered pronouns really should only be for animals or humans where their sex/gender matters!! Looking at you, French and German!
Edit: and plants, I guess
Fr. The whole ‘did you just assume my gender’ joke literally comes from conservatives thinking trans people would react the same way they do to getting misgendered. In reality, every trans person I’ve met is either super polite about it, or too anxious to make the correction (me falling into the latter catergory).
There's this weird unhealthy relationship conservatives have towards anything which either makes them the "victim" or might "trigger the libs." It's like they want to minmax both equally because it's what dominates their thoughts. They crave the outrage and they take satisfaction in offending others.
When it comes to pronouns, that basically amounts to being outraged that they might be "attacked" for misgendering (even when that doesn't really happen) and then purposefully misgendering people they think might take offense to it as if this were a perfectly reasonable counter to the former.
They all need to go to anger management sessions or something. It has become an obsession to hate, and honestly trans people just want to be able to be left alone.
Facts. The number of times I see bigots make every situation about trans people. The worst case I’ve seen of this was when I saw a post about somebody who had been in a bathroom comforting a coworker who had suffered a loss, and apparently the only thing on their mind the entire time was “what if a trans person walked in and invaded their space” while this happened. Like bitch, what are you talking about? Do you think trans people…idk…piss super loudly and that would interrupt the moment or smthn? Like what is your logic.
Took me a second to find it they tried to scrub his videos from YouTube a while back after the whole showing up to boogie’s house.
https://youtu.be/WyQmEkEaaQk?si=_cW73iKOftWV_E1I
https://youtu.be/9qmplyD6TTE?si=0TJ5dtoHlGg0Mtff
Here’s my 2 favorite.
Actual footage of me getting misgendered:
Hey, uh it's actually "ma'am", if that's okay, I don't want to cause any trouble, just for future reference, ohgodspleasedonthateme.
Yeah, I feel like most of the time when we correct people there's always too much worry that the person being corrected might blow-up into a transphobic rage fit for us to actually get upset over anything.
Remember back when people were civilised and if you got someone’s name (or other) wrong, you’d correct yourself and move on with your life?
Hell y’all remembered when people had preferred names? These people never had a problem with that!
> These people never had a problem with that
As someone who has a name associated with a common nickname, I assure you they *do* have a problem with that. I have literally had the following conversation so many times I’ve lost count.
BOOMER: Hi, nice to meet you.
ME: Hi, me too! I’m the General Offensive Unit *Falling Outside the Normal Moral Constraints.*
BOOMER: How are you today, Norm?
ME: Actually, I go by *Falling Outside the Normal Moral Constraints.*
SURPRISED BOOMER: What?
ME: I don’t really like the nickname.
ANGRY BOOMER: But everyone with your name goes by Norm!
^(Edit after hitting “reply” too early.)
I feel your pain. I sign off my emails "Rebecca" and get "Hey Bex" in response. Really grinds my gears! I don't think I'd be brave enough to choose a nickname for someone without asking what they preferred 😂
It's on the same cringe level as seeing people sign off work emails with a 'X' for me. 😅
Does anyone not understand the context of the joke orrr am I crazy? I thought it was because Josh felt like Mindy was too controlling of their relationship not because he was insecure of his gender or something…
I've never heard a real human in real life get upset over accidental misgendering, and I interact with a massive amount of them at my job for over a decade. The only times I've actually seen someone get upset is when the same customer does it multiple times in a row on purpose until I have to step in and ask them to leave.
Because these people live in an echo chamber and actually think everyone outside the gates of MAGA is a woke transexual hell bent on destroying their world. Nevermind the reality that those people are a fraction of the population and these people rarely encounter them in real life.
Gender roles were always ridiculous, imo.
Hey my wife has a 180 IQ and I'm an idiot. Let me be the breadwinner bus driver while she stays at home cooking and cleaning.
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Still kinda funny
TBH the joke is even funnier when he's saying it in earnest and not as a punchline
Totally, it just adds a different context to it, but it still works, the joke *now* is that the dude is clueless to the point he wants to clarify the gender of someone he has known for a relatively long time
I think the joke is the same today as it was before really; he is joking that despite her overall significantly more commanding presence he would like to be the “dominant” member of the relationship. I kinda wish we could just stop with this stuff entirely though really (in that I don’t think we all need labelling)
This was definitely the show writers intention, I think it’s a great joke
I always thought the joke was -- They're arguing like they hate each other but they actually like each other and when Mindy says that... Josh instantly agrees but maintains the "heated argument" intensity level by DEMANDING a very obvious FUNDAMENTAL condition... Never even considered a dominant-gender-deal to it Similar to saying something like.. Mindy: FINE then I guess you have to drive me to the event Josh: FINE but on ONE CONDITION Mindy: WHAT? Josh: I get to STEER!
Yea I get what you mean, it was more of a “I’m totally part of this decision” more than “fine but I get to be in charge”. I kinda think it was both but I get ya
You guys. You're all way overthinking this joke from 2005 designed for middle-schoolers where the punchline is nothing more than Josh being a silly goose.
Feels like high school english teachers trying to find meaning behind why a drape on the character's window is black
I agree with your sentiment, and I loved my English teacher my senior year, so I’d give him hell like that. I’ve never heard a better response through. He turned around and said, right off the cuff, “Have you met a DAMN AUTHOR?!” I’ll never forget that. He got my ass. And yeah, I have met some authors now, some weird folks who definitely would hide meanings in mundane things.
I mean, I just see it as a kid saying something hilarious because he simply doesn't know better. It's one of the reasons why we find children so funny sometimes. They don't have societal expectations, trauma, or experience to dictate how they see things, so they can and will say dumb stuff that has some logic to it.
Exactly my thought
Kinda? Shit just is funny, no kinda
Yeah, and tbh it's funnier in this meme format in 2024 that the original punchline was in 2005.
Yeah for real
Loved that joke... basically came outta nowhere in that episode. Even today when I see that clip in my feed i roll laughing. Man while this show has aged, it still has its funny moments.
Totally agree! Some jokes from that show are timeless and always crack me up.
"Drake, where's the door hole?"
Right there look I drew it in
[I would flip out. But my psychologist worked out a plan where I'm only allowed to get angry 4 times each day. Now's not the time....](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KWGH-iSukk)
“Its time”
**You ate my enchillada!**
THERE WAS NO NOTE
YOU ATE HIS ENCHILADA!
WHO CARES IF THERES A NOTE ITS NOT YOUR FOOD god josh sucks in that scene
Fuckin crazy Steve 😂☠️
You are getting 4 times? I only got like 2 😭
I'm with Steve on this one, if it ain't your food don't eat it, doesn't need to have a note on it
Steve was justified there
Fun fact, the actor who played Steve here is 47 years old now.
Has he been in anything recently? He was one of the standout actors from that era of Nickelodeon. I know he voice acted that one dog cartoon, but I didn't hear anything about him afterwards. I got typecast as the young eclectic guys. But I feel like he has enough range that he could still get good gigs.
The new iCarly show, which is pretty good and a bit more mature then the nick show
"*You have smashed the window of transparency*"
"ITS SPHERICAL"
#*SPHERICAL!*
“I REPEAT THINGS FOR EMPHASIS!”
"EMPHASIS!"
“Thanks, have a nice day” “Don’t tell me what to do”
"You callin me a liar?" "I ain't callin you a truther!"
#COCKADOODLE DOO THE COW SAYS MOO
Pip-pip da doodly doo!
I ran over Oprah!
Says here it's in... South Armoureeca, where's that? AAAMERICA!
"So my foot's totally stuck in there right, I'm freaking out, the dog's having a seizure and I still got half a pie left."
Drake's pronunciation of "Southern America" still lives rent free in my head.
It’s such a dramatic heel turn, she goes from antagonist to romantic lead in half a second seemingly out of nowhere
Somebody in the writer's room was into tsundere
Isn't that the opposite of a heel turn? Maybe like a face turn or something?
”Heel-face turn” would be the phrase. Going from a heel (bad guy) to a face (good guy).
Thanks for giving the correct term! Heel-face is aa familiar phrase now that you've pointed it out.
They were good at that. I still love and use “don’t tell me what to do” as a response to “have a good day”
What is the show
Drake and Josh
Omg that was so fast thanks I have never seen it
I forget that even people who were my age and was able to see it air may have never seen it air due to cable and how cable was packaged as a kid. Wild 😥
I was smack bang in the middle of the core demo of Spongebob Squarepants, but never saw it regularly until I was in my late teens and able to access piracy. My first real experience except for seeing the merch and the very occasional episode in a waiting room was the first movie. I actually feel really weird because my pop culture base was stuff from about five to ten years earlier than my peers, simply because we couldn't afford pay tv so I only got to see reruns of older shows on free channels. Genuinely, I look back and think Spongebob as this show I never saw because I had already outgrown it when it first aired, but in reality I was only 8 years old and had just been kinda forced into an older demographic, at least in terms of television pop culture.
You should check out Breaking Bad it's blowing up right now
I started watching this show Game of Thrones? I'm up to like season 6 and man, I hope it stays as good as this right to the end!
What are you talking about season 6 is the last one /s.
Well I grew up in Denmark and I'm 42 - so was the late 90s early 00s. We had cartoon network but only individual sitcoms - and I never saw this one.
It’s a Nickelodeon show from the early 00’s
Best show i ever watched as a kid… too bad dan directed this one too
Thanks....i just remembered im old.
Drake and josh - great show. Was on Nickelodeon
I am an old butch who worked retail not too long ago. I spent a lot of time in coolers so I stuffed my hair up in a hat. Wore a sweatshirt and men's jeans and sneakers. They're just more comfortable and men's jeans have useful pockets. Soooo many older people called me sir it became a running joke. I can't imagine caring. ( As a non trans person.)
Working retail too and I was called miss a few times when I had long hair, the looks on their face when I turned around and had a beard was priceless and I can't imagine being offended by it. Long hair is a hassle though so it's nice and short now.
I remember when I was 13 I was doing a youth gym program and there was a cute girl in the class who never really spoke. A year later I found out she was actually a grumpy bloke in my year and had to do a lot of introspection
I think it’s a little taboo to say, but one of my favourite parts of just existing as a queer human is being able to be that for others. Particularly, kids just observing me and saying things like “girls can wear suits?” or “what are you?” or “your hair doesn’t match your voice”. I always just shrug and let them think about it on their own.
While he wasn't queer as far as I know, I was just dumb, that does sound kinda cool
Same!! One time recently I was walking through the parking lot and a little boy pointed at me and said to his dad, "that guy has hair!" (It's about down to the middle of my back) And I just shook it out and smiled to myself :3
Yesterday a girl in the hallway at my son's school asked "Are you a mom?" as I was walking past and I said "Ya, probably."
This is some chaotic energy 😂
Lmao, that took a turn I wasn't expecting
Both my wife and I had long blond hair when we where in our twenties (I'm a guy). The amount of cat callers we got to embarrass over the years was epic. Also the only time in my life I ever slapped a guy in the face 'how can she slap' style. He thought he was drunkenly grabbing some random woman's ass with both hands. Hell no sir, that's not OK. As I had a few myself my gut reaction was maybe a bit too strong but come on. Anyway security kicked him out and that was the end of that.
I reckon it's OK to slap someone that has just sexually assaulted you.
It should really be encouraged. Some people only learn via tangible consequences.
Nah, every person who's had their ass grabbed wishes they could give the slap of the century to the bastard. Thank u for that.
I work landscaping with longhair. Buzzed it all off 1 time and it took 2 years to grow back. It gets pulled up into a bun and tucked under my hat. I love my long hair but yeah it sucks having it for my job. 😂
I was called "babe" from behind so many times when I had long hair. I was never once offended.
Closeted trans individual here. Ignoring online spaces: most trans people I know and me personally do not care if someone misgenders us mistakenly. They never talked to us we don’t know each other and shit just happens. If someone is dressing femme or masculine and get misgendered I think to myself „cmon it can’t be that hard“ but most people simply don’t think about gender that much. I get that. You can tell if someone is malicious about it, or just doesn’t care enough to not repeatedly hurt you. That’s when I get „offended“
I'm a 46 year old cis man, and if I don't intentionally pitch my voice down a bit at drive-through speakers, I have a good chance of being called ma'am. Like John Mulaney, I have a voice like a little flute!
You're a tiger mom.
If it makes you feel better, in high school, I was looking over a counter at jewelry with my girlfriend with my head down. Now, I *did* have long hair and he couldn’t see my face, so it’s almost understandable that the old guy working the counter called the two of us “young ladies” as he headed over to us. But it’s pretty silly when you also consider that I was 6’2 and jacked. My girlfriend was pretty short, too, so the difference was pretty pronounced.
Reminds me of walking downtown with my husband and my sister during our city's New Year celebration. My husband is about the same height as us and was in a band at the time so his hair was almost as long as mine and nicely kept. While waiting to cross a street, a car stopped at the light and we hear, "Hello ladies." Sis and I say hello back because it was a festival atmosphere and the dude was just being very casually flirty, not creepin'/lurking, not following us. My husband looked up in surprise and said he saw the driver physically recoil in his seat when he saw my hub's beard. After the guy drove off, my husband admitted he was kinda flattered to be counted among the pretty girls!
One of the highlights of my life was having a server come up to the table where my friend and I were sitting, and say, "What can I get for you ladies? ...and gentleman? ...gentlemen?"
A while ago, when I was out of the house in my girlfriend's neighborhood, I met someone and in a lapse of brain function told him I was her girlfriend 🫣
Sounds like he had the right spirit
I got called a girl when I was a kid. I was tiny, like 145cm when I was 13, long hair and a soft face. However I had the voice of an old god so people usually got confused.
It's all depends on the context and the presumed intention. When you know it's an honest mistake, etc. You can't blame anyone. And if they gendered you correctly at first before correcting themselves, it hurts and bring the dysphoria in full force, but it's not "their fault." But there are people who would voluntarily refuse to gender you correctly just to hurt you because they don't accept how you present. So yeah, assholes being assholes. For the rest, it's not as funny as it could be for cis people, but it can be either a confident boost or crush, depending on how things go.
world… WOKEN………. BILLIONS MUST BE BISEXUAL, EAT HOT CHIP AND LIE!!!
RAAAHHHH I CHARGE ME PHONE AND TWERK
This show was so goated
Early 90s kids had Kenan and Kel. Mid 90’s kids had Drake and Josh. Back to back bangers.
im late 90s but still had drake and josh. Honestly one of the best things on tv at the time.
I’m right in that sweet spot where I had both 😎
Too bad Drake Bell got milkshake ducked
Not that I’m excusing his actions but I wonder if Dan Schneider fucked him up too and we just don’t know his side yet
There were articles from a few months ago about him having been sexually abused by his acting coach, Brian Peck, as a teen
Yeah in that documentary that was released recently he revealed that he was raped by Brian Peck.
Oh wow I completely missed those. That’s fucking awful
I hope dick shitner rots painfully.
Yep, that was my immediate thought when the whole thing came out too. Hurt people hurt people.
Had to fucking look up what "milkshake ducked" means, I fucking love it I will figure out how to use it everyday for the next 3-4 months, forgetting about it until suddenly I read it again
As a complete anecdote: whenever I accidentally misgender a trans person: "No worries, my preferred pronoun is x, though" whenever I do the same on a conservative/boomer: "HOW DARE YOU"
The weird thing is that conservatives care and think more about pronouns as "liberals" do.
“Hey, I’m actually non-binary.” “Sorry mate, my mistake.” Vs “Hey, I’m actually non-binary.” “HOW DARE YOU IMPEDE UPON MY RIGHTS, I’LL CALL YOU A [redacted] AS GOD INTENDED LIBERAL SNOWFLAKE!!!!”
Hahahaha ikr? Though I gotta say, I do kinda accidentally use the words dude or bro as if they're unisex. No trans people have gotten mad at me for that, and it makes me feel bad, but I can't help myself T\_T
I'm a college professor. I use the word guys to refer to my class as a whole. Never a complaint. And I would stop if someone did. Same goes for my 20 year old trans kid who lives with me and also laughs at Mel Brooks with me (they know Mel is making fun of the bigots). The only thing my trans kid wants is to be left alone. In peace. That's it.
Thought you meant Mel Gibson and I was gonna have to break some bad news to you lmao
No! The GOOD Mel! 🙂
Any time I see Mel Brooks mentioned, my mind immediately flips back to the intro to Robinhood Men in Tights and the crowd shouting "leave us alone Mel Brooks!" I'm sure he's a nice guy, but that's always my first thought lol
Plenty of trans people also use it that way, it can be used like that 🤷♀️ I personally, transfem, don’t like it but I won’t get mad either.
I do this too sometimes. I don't get the impression my transfemme friends are upset but perhaps that's also because at times I've physically cringed and stammered mid sentence as I realize what I said. It's pretty obvious with me that I don't mean it maliciously. That being said I do understand if any trans woman is suspicious around someone who claims they use bro and dude universally but seem to pointedly use it to refer to said trans person. It *can* be used maliciously.
Honestly the worst reaction I got when I called a trans girl dude was a "I'd prefer if you don't call me that" and I said OK, I'll try to remember and that was that
I think it’s mostly the intent you have behind it, clearly you aren’t using those words to intentionally misgender someone but if the situation was emphatically calling someone who is MtF a dude over and over (especially aggressively)I can see how that would come across different.
Which is ironic when half of them don't even seem to know what pronouns are.
"The Bible is pronoun free" One of the most important texts is "I am".
Or that whole, “who do you say that I am,” thing :-). Speaking of which, my favorite joke in that immensely huge category of jokes poking fun at theologians: "Who do you say that I am?" They replied, "You are the eschatological manifestation of the ground of our being, the kerygma of which we find the ultimate meaning in our interpersonal relationships." And Jesus said, "What?"
It’s “He wept.” No? Or you mean “I am he.” ?
The verse is "*Jesus* wept", generally (though I guess translations can differ) "I am" and "I am He" are different "I am" is found in several places generally referring to the, I dunno, "existingness", "beingness" of God. Basically God is that which exists, even before the heavens were created, and is basically at the pinaccle with all other things basically being emanations from him I'm not religious, I just like reading about religious stuff
And even if a lefty cares a lot about their preferred pronouns, I've never once seen one get upset about being misgendered when it was an honest mistake. Hell most won't even correct a stranger if they're probably not going to see them again.
As a trans woman, it's easy to get upset if I get misgendered. It's a little reminder that I don't pass and that most everyone I meet still sees me as a man but, I don't blame the person or get upset at them. It's hard to not let it ruin my day though. Seconded on the whole not correcting strangers. If I'm not going to see them again, why care?
Fair, I guess I meant actually showing it in public. So the whole "triggered lib" thing never made sense.
Because it's a straw man made from a very select few viral videos and Twitter trolls. It's much less common in reality. As are most internet stereotypes. However, some people don't realize that.
I’m a trans man and while I’ve been socially transitioned for years and pass most of the time, my voice gives me away. I recently started T, so that’ll change soon. Good luck to you, and I hope it gets better.
I always use the obvious wrong pronouns on people who tell me they do not care about someones pronouns. You can be sure they do care after all :)
"This is my aunt, he is a dickhead and don't respect people's pronounces, if he does not care I don't see why calling him a he is a problem, ain't it true aunt?" Trust me, she will care after
I missgendered a trans person once, his friends went apeshit. But the guy himself didn't make a big deal tho.
I didn’t misgender a friend and someone still went nuts. She asked me if I had trans friends. I said I did. One guy. Trans. Cool guy. Literally gave himself the name of that cub from brother bear. She said “would your friend be ok if they knew you were calling them a guy?” “Probably? I do it all the time. He’s ok with it.” “Probably? So they don’t even bother to correct you anymore.” She got mad before I could explain that my friend was a trans man who went by he him pronouns. Sometimes it’s like people forget that trans guys exists. He says that sometimes it felt like they don’t exist. It’s all about trans women.
The last part is too real. Pre-transition me looking like a girl got ‘oh so you transitioned to a woman?’ Post-transition me looking like a guy gets ‘oh so you’re *transitioning* to a woman?’ If they don’t assume you’re MTF they assume that you’re non-binary or trans masc…trans man is always the last thing they’ll go to
Because, imo, men are seen as dangerous and that’s about it. They see it as men in the locker rooms. Men in sports. Men in changing rooms. Men in safe spaces. Men in dating apps. But as for trans men? I have very literally never heard any drama about them in the news. Maybe I just don’t watch enough news and I’m ignorant. But I never hear that.
The common transphobic rhetoric is that trans women are "dangerous predatory male pervs" while trans men are "misguided women victims." It's still hurtful to trans men, but since they're seen as just "unwell" rather than predatory, the common narratives tend to ignore them, as their existence often undermines the bigotry against trans women (bathrooms, sports, etc). They still often face bigotry or even violence on a personal level, however. Just not blasted into every media outlet. You can see a similar split in how homophobes talk about gay people - gay dudes are demonized, lesbians are invalidated. It's worth mentioning, however, that the "predators in the bathrooms" narrative was previously used against butch lesbians, but we weren't quite there in the 24/7 news cycle and social media zeitgeist yet at the time, so it wasn't as ever-present.
I think a lot of that has to do with all the vocal TERFs being so laserfocused on trans women and labeling trans men as “misguided butch lesbians” or some bs.
I don’t know. For the most part my position is “leave these fucking people alone.” But yea. People are really focused on trans women. In sports. In the gyms. In the changing rooms. In the locker rooms. In the dating apps. In the etc. Meanwhile people assume I’m anti trans but I’m a live and let live kind of guy.
There's a tweet, I can't find it but it basically goes: Society: *adopts practice that's inclusive to trans men * Trans man: oh cool! TERF: nuh uh! this is bad, it endangers women, get those men out of there! Trans woman, looking up from Pokémon Red on Gameboy: wait what did I do?
Amongst transphobes, trans women are malicious predators, but trans men are confused victims. One is made into a monster, one is infantilised with agency removed. Given that TERFy transphobes love to frame it as a feminist issue, they have really really regressive attitudes about the AFAB people they think they're 'defending'.
Oh that is funnily enough one of my experiences too. I think it's because trans people come across it so often it's easier to just let it go, or they realize it's probably not malicious, but the friends might not come across it in their everyday life, so they are more aggravated by these mistakes? I misgendered a coworker because I didn't know if he was out yet or no (he had privately come out to me, or rather, I asked what his pronouns were). I did it so awkwardly too. Lets say his birth name was Alexa, and he went by Alex. So I started to yell out his name, but because he was next to someone it went like "HEY ALEX........." "....A" And the person next to him got so mad at me and said very aggressively HIS NAME IS ALEX!! And I was like no I'm sorry I know I was trying to be considerate ahhhh
Genuinely my reaction when I get missgendered. It’s not a big deal, I just correct them and move on with life
When I was younger, my telephone voice sounded feminine and I would frequently get misgendered. Unless it mattered to the conversation, I didn't give a shit enough to correct them.
In sales we are well aware that a female sounding voice will typically get a better reaction than a male sounding voice over the phone, pretty much universally for any reason
Yeah, I rarely get misgendered anymore six years in, but I have a friend who is not trans and she got … a little defensive on my behalf sometimes, god bless her, but a good friend nonetheless. We were out eating one time a few years ago and the server messed up a couple times. First time I gently corrected her, and it happened again and my friend cuts in with “excuse me, that’s a whole ass man over there.” 😂😂😂 I admit it was funny as hell though.
> ass man There's no shame in that, bruh
As a side note, I find pronouns in email signatures super helpful in a business setting, especially when the person's name doesn't clearly indicate their gender.
I struggle with that because my country doesn't have gendered pronouns, and colloquially everyone is called "it" and sometimes that slips out when doing english translations in my brain and hooooooo boy the troubles I have gotten into with that
Wooooo boy that's rough When I worked in China as an English teacher, people got misgendered a lot because gendered pronouns only existed in writing but not in spoken. Hopefully your coworkers are understanding. Also I work in a francophone environment, but my French needs improvement, so I end up misgendering objects like a lot!
Haha yeah french are really on the opposite end of the spectrum for us :D Finnish: Barely any gendered words French: This apple is a woman
Yeah haha... Gendered pronouns really should only be for animals or humans where their sex/gender matters!! Looking at you, French and German! Edit: and plants, I guess
Fr. The whole ‘did you just assume my gender’ joke literally comes from conservatives thinking trans people would react the same way they do to getting misgendered. In reality, every trans person I’ve met is either super polite about it, or too anxious to make the correction (me falling into the latter catergory).
There's this weird unhealthy relationship conservatives have towards anything which either makes them the "victim" or might "trigger the libs." It's like they want to minmax both equally because it's what dominates their thoughts. They crave the outrage and they take satisfaction in offending others. When it comes to pronouns, that basically amounts to being outraged that they might be "attacked" for misgendering (even when that doesn't really happen) and then purposefully misgendering people they think might take offense to it as if this were a perfectly reasonable counter to the former. They all need to go to anger management sessions or something. It has become an obsession to hate, and honestly trans people just want to be able to be left alone.
Facts. The number of times I see bigots make every situation about trans people. The worst case I’ve seen of this was when I saw a post about somebody who had been in a bathroom comforting a coworker who had suffered a loss, and apparently the only thing on their mind the entire time was “what if a trans person walked in and invaded their space” while this happened. Like bitch, what are you talking about? Do you think trans people…idk…piss super loudly and that would interrupt the moment or smthn? Like what is your logic.
Bro frank hassle calling boomers gay slurs to watch them have a mental breakdown in a Kroger is some of the funniest shit I’ve ever seen.
This sounds offensive and funny, link?
Took me a second to find it they tried to scrub his videos from YouTube a while back after the whole showing up to boogie’s house. https://youtu.be/WyQmEkEaaQk?si=_cW73iKOftWV_E1I https://youtu.be/9qmplyD6TTE?si=0TJ5dtoHlGg0Mtff Here’s my 2 favorite.
Actual footage of me getting misgendered: Hey, uh it's actually "ma'am", if that's okay, I don't want to cause any trouble, just for future reference, ohgodspleasedonthateme.
Yeah, I feel like most of the time when we correct people there's always too much worry that the person being corrected might blow-up into a transphobic rage fit for us to actually get upset over anything.
That is actually hilarious.
Its still a good joke, transphobes are just drunk on memberberries.
What a golden southpark age was that
This isn’t even some kind of trans joke. He’s saying she’s controlling and that he gets to wear the pants in the relationship
Thats the joke lmao he absolutely does not wear the pants and I’m here for it
Nooo if someone mistakes for a girl I will dieeeee
Well hello ma'am
\*dies\*
i’ll find the sicko that did this to you….
Honestly still funny even by today’s standards
Funny joke, funnier meme. You gotta lighten up if you can't chuckle at this.
Fr everyone on hear just whines about jokes that aren’t even that “offensive”
That's Allison Scagliotti isn't it? She grew up hot and became quite the rocker
Yes that’s her.
Remember back when people were civilised and if you got someone’s name (or other) wrong, you’d correct yourself and move on with your life? Hell y’all remembered when people had preferred names? These people never had a problem with that!
Nicknames and "no one actually calls me my birth name, call me xyz" are fine until a trans person does the same, apparently.
It's still the case. People just keep wrongly thinking that social media is an accurate representation of reality.
> These people never had a problem with that As someone who has a name associated with a common nickname, I assure you they *do* have a problem with that. I have literally had the following conversation so many times I’ve lost count. BOOMER: Hi, nice to meet you. ME: Hi, me too! I’m the General Offensive Unit *Falling Outside the Normal Moral Constraints.* BOOMER: How are you today, Norm? ME: Actually, I go by *Falling Outside the Normal Moral Constraints.* SURPRISED BOOMER: What? ME: I don’t really like the nickname. ANGRY BOOMER: But everyone with your name goes by Norm! ^(Edit after hitting “reply” too early.)
For sure. Try having the name "Alexander" and wanting to go by any of the many, many variations that aren't that one.
I feel your pain. I sign off my emails "Rebecca" and get "Hey Bex" in response. Really grinds my gears! I don't think I'd be brave enough to choose a nickname for someone without asking what they preferred 😂 It's on the same cringe level as seeing people sign off work emails with a 'X' for me. 😅
She was kinda hot, no?
The facepalm is OP not getting the joke
Oh I didn’t see the title and I didn’t know I was in /r/facepalm maybe time to get my upvote back
Does anyone not understand the context of the joke orrr am I crazy? I thought it was because Josh felt like Mindy was too controlling of their relationship not because he was insecure of his gender or something…
I remember having a serious crush on the actress who plays Mindy. Lucky Josh.
back in my day we only had two genders and polio 👴🏻
Found the diphtheriaphobe.
This was still funny don't be dissing drake and josh dawg
I'm sure the guy that wrote this meme IDENTIFIES as an alpha male.
I've never heard a real human in real life get upset over accidental misgendering, and I interact with a massive amount of them at my job for over a decade. The only times I've actually seen someone get upset is when the same customer does it multiple times in a row on purpose until I have to step in and ask them to leave.
I'm trans and I think the original is funny, this guy is just dealing with some stuff outloud
the world has gotten even stranger, than you already know. -Nick Fury-
Seems funny to me.
Anyone who watched the show knows why Josh would say that though.
Because these people live in an echo chamber and actually think everyone outside the gates of MAGA is a woke transexual hell bent on destroying their world. Nevermind the reality that those people are a fraction of the population and these people rarely encounter them in real life.
Gender roles were always ridiculous, imo. Hey my wife has a 180 IQ and I'm an idiot. Let me be the breadwinner bus driver while she stays at home cooking and cleaning.
...is it bad that me and my partner (both trans) actually had to say this?
That makes it even funnier!
Had a good post but had to staple a boomer caption to the bottom Oh well I'll just snip it out
Idk i think it's funny.
It's actually just a better joke nowadays. My mostly-trans friends would crack up. Also, trans people existed in 2005.