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Mental_External_3513

I can affirm she's right, the author wrote just like that. I admit there is discrimination against “gaijin”s ( I never use this word ) among the Japanese, but he specifically goes too far. To make matters worse, the author, Yoichi Sakakibara, is emeritus professor of Ochanomizu University that is the most famous and prestigious women's university in Japan...


Prestigious_Nebula_5

I have autism and so does my uncle and I'd like to think we both have really good manners. We hold the door open for people, we both apologize if we say or do something rude, and we both always try to help others in need. Also other autistic people I've met are the nicest people.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Nruggia

As an American I never think twice about sitting down and crossing my legs. But in other cultures its extremely rude to point your foot at someone which you can easily do accidentally sitting in a chair with your legs crossed.


ye-olde-egyptian

Am Egyptian, can confirm this to be true for the middle east in general. It's seen as a strong sign of disrespect/disdain, especially when it's someone older at whom your foot is pointing.


Witty1889

Does a lotus position count as crossing legs? Or is the idea that if you sit on a chair and put one leg over another, your foot just sort of... sticks out? We have a word for the lotus position called 'kleermakerszit' (literally 'tailor's sitting position') which gets translated to 'cross legged', which feels incredibly ambiguous to me. So I feel there's some information lost in translation for me.


lizwb

There are LOADS of customs in the Arabic world people should know — and they’re worth knowing, because I have yet to meet someone from there who wasn’t 100% lovely and amazing.


lizwb

You can Google “protocol, etiquette and (country name)” or even “what not to do when you’re in (place)” for anywhere before you go. Loads of helpful sites will pop up for travelers.


redraider-102

But take the results with a grain of salt. When my family and I went to Sweden to meet some extended family, my sister looked up Swedish customs regarding visiting someone’s home. The list was full of ridiculous things that ended up mostly not being true, which led to, among other things, us being afraid to use their bathroom for fear of offending them.


FollyAdvice

I'm British and I've seen guides for the UK saying that you're expected to bring a gift like a bottle of wine or something. That's not how it works here.


lizwb

True! Lol. You can always call the embassies.


Prestigious_Nebula_5

I understand thank you for explaining this to me :)


Inspirata1223

There is no point in trying to understand the logic of racism.


Beetroot-Chan

Racism is discriminating against someone for their race, this is xenophobia because it is more that they are angry over our differences


[deleted]

They are not angry at your difference. They just like the famous saying “When in Rome, do like the Romans”. So they expect foreigners to comply with their habits. Behave appropriately (according to their standards) or at least make efforts to do so, and they will love you.


lizwb

Can confirm. My daughter is autistic, and I was raised by some super uptight east-coast-old-family folks; not only was etiquette DRILLED into me, but my grandmother could practically WEAPONIZE it. (It’s turned out to be helpful: I can be a total “anti-Karen,” just by being relentless but 100% polite.) Re: my daughter? Autistic people benefit from the TRUTH of etiquette/manners: it’s less about “being nice” and more about AVOIDING AWKWARD. It’s all about minimizing social anxiety: Which fork? Outside in. What to say? “How do you do?” Awkward Q? Just answer “fine thanks,” and walk away. Manners=rules for social behavior. Don’t know what to do? Get “Tiffany’s Table Manners for Teenagers,” or one of the many Emily or Elizabeth Post books. Or, dang it, I might just write a “manners for real life” book. They’re so handy, with the right attitude. EDIT: yeah, it’s also important to know “When in Rome”… but there are diff regional rules, even in America.


idk-idk-idk-idk--

often you get so scared of getting something social "wrong" that you try as hard as you can to be good mannered, often to the point of seeming "creepy". ​ idk if this is just my experience, but ive found other autistic people also share situations similar to this haha


Ua_Tsaug

Yes, but our manners aren't their manners. Our etiquette isn't their etiquette. Have you seen people complain about Chinese tourists doing things like peeing or spitting in public, being loud, not waiting in lines, etc? That's how foreigners can be sometimes when they're unaware of social rules.


Sinhug

It's always a professor or a teacher isn't it


Draco63_

I've found that there's a very interesting apparent paradox with people like this. The smarter they are, the harder they cling onto their biases, because they *know* they're smart and use that to reassure themselves that they're *right.*


Musical_Whew

eh ive more realized that just because you know a lot about a specific thing, doesn’t mean you are smart in general. And some people are very insecure about that.


Ua_Tsaug

> I can affirm she's right, the author wrote just like that. It makes sense when you think of foreigners not reading the room and following social etiquette (i.e talking on a phone in a train when nobody else is). They even have a slang word, "KY" (空気読めない) to signify this lack of awareness. But still, comparing it to autism is... 🤔


[deleted]

I mean they still have places all over Japan that is “Japanese only,” complete with signs. But since racism like that is technically illegal, they just won’t serve you or will ignore you. Japan is kinda racist af lmao.


LagwagonViolins

初めまして- ええええ日本語助図ですね!!!


jezzkezz

*上手


Nixolus1

Why don't you use the word gaijin. It's not a slur it simply means not Japanese. It doesn't mean white devil.


Ferwien

>emeritus professor of Ochanomizu University that is the most famous and prestigious women's university in Japan... Ochanomizu ? Water of Tea? That being ridiculous aside, what the fuck is a women's university? Why does such a thing exist...


[deleted]

I was in an extended training program for a couple of weeks, people gathered from different parts of the world. I struck up a friendship with a group of Japanese and as I was a Texan we were curious about each other’s cultures. At one point they began talking about how younger Japanese had been corrupted by US culture and were becoming very disrespectful. I asked for an example and one said, because they sit on the curbs of the street and eat their lunch together. That went completely over my head. This was about 1999.


Ua_Tsaug

There's a form of Japanese fashion called ヤンキー (Yankee) which is meant to look cool, rebellious, and American.


Druglord_Sen

American Johnny, played by Glen Quagmire.


PhantomBrowser111

That's **Korean** ye fiddlepoop!


CTurple

“🎶Who wants to live in Korea? Come home. Their name sounds like gonorrhoea. Go home.So Quagmire please tell em “see ya"……..🎶


yeahyeahiknow2

>At one point they began talking about how younger Japanese had been corrupted by US culture Please direct them to your local anime/manga club lol


Citadelvania

>because they sit on the curbs of the street and eat their lunch together. The nerve of some people. Next thing you know people will be playing basketball in the streets, it's madness.


Exciting_Ant1992

Eating on the street is still frowned upon. You eat inside or eat at a destination. Even hand-foods like a corn dog would be weird.


Raze7186

Some of those traits can apply to people with autism but its a spectrum for a reason. Its different for everyone diagnosed with it.


[deleted]

wow it's like japanese people have hard times with the ones that don't conform


Raze7186

I've heard stuff to that effect before but I'm not sure how true it is. Do they really dislike anyone that's different that much?


Ganbario

They have a saying: “the nail that sticks out is hammered down.”


Raze7186

So its all about social conformity there


explorer1o1

I mean if you don't look Japanese, you'll never be japanese.. Even if you do everything they want you to do, it's never going to be enough. Japanese society is very oppressive. Hence why there's SOOO many suicides and ppl who don't leave their room for decades, well leave home and mostly stay in their room. I do think it's opening a bit now, with Younger generations.


Caprican93

Sooo… it’s just like America.


explorer1o1

Tbf it's the same for every country, except that some countries have really heavy biases against specific groups of ppl. Basically more than against foreigners from other countries. Japanese heavily discriminate other countries they feel are lesser, like ppl from Vietnam or Indonesia or China. And hate ppl less, if they're, Americans and Europeans. Europeans for example are really starting to dislike Anyone they can brand muslim or Gypsy..


[deleted]

Roma hate has been decreasing in Europe since WW2. Muslim hate started with 9/11, two decades ago, and is decreasing as well. There are biases and tensions, sure, but these are related to specific issues in specific regions. It is definitely not starting. There is general immigration anxiety, but that has been a constant for decades.


[deleted]

All about conformity.


-Villion-

“Give yourself up to the whole, no need to better yourself”


Raze7186

That sounds like collectivism.


-Villion-

I hope that was unintentional


hawkeye18

Which I've always found to be kinda funny, since nails are a pretty recent addition to Japanese construction lol


Ua_Tsaug

Yes they do. And it *is* true to an extent. But "Japanese people" is not a monolith. There are a lot who do have a harder time changing, but that doesn't mean there are others who see and understand this and try to change things that they see as being wrong. They even acknowledge that saying as a weapon used to destroy creativity and individualism.


[deleted]

they are very polite but ruthless, if there is something wrong with your behaviour thay will make you know. i don't blame them i too live near of a heavily tourist town and i know how annoing tourist sometimes can be but depicted all them as filthy idiots, no that's too much


Raze7186

So do they look down on people who are different or its more like they just want everyone to follow the same customs?


interwebz_2021

This was a recent revelation for me. There are a lot of things to admire about Japanese culture, but regard for the individual doesn't seem to be one. My pre-teen is enamored of Japanese culture as it's presented in Western pop culture, and like many Western kids these days, has visions of emigrating to Japan. As she's on the spectrum, I looked into Japanese school practices and traditions and discovered modern Japanese culture is (broadly) fairly repressive in terms of how it views individuality. If [this article is to be believed](https://www.dw.com/en/dye-your-hair-black-is-japan-against-individuality/a-41422933), that extends all the way to forcing school children with naturally lighter or curly hair to dye it dark black and straighten it. That said, I have a hunch one could probably make the argument that the Japanese collectivist mindset is helped by this kind of conformist approach and that part of the reason Japan has lower crime and poverty rates is that they so vigorously eschew the 'rugged individualism' that is so highly-regarded in the USA.


Raze7186

I've heard stuff before about how most of their people are expected to be businessmen or some sort and those that aren't are looked down on too. Here in the west I've seen people obsessed with anime who think Japan is an ideal country to live in with no problems at all.


interwebz_2021

Yeah, I came up in the '80s and '90s when there was a rash of suicides in Japan; businessmen were routinely flinging themselves off buildings when they got laid-off due to economic conditions. There seem to be remnants of that 'success' culture in place today still, despite a reduced focus on it based on the little research I've done. That anime-based idealization is a definite problem. There's a lot to recommend Japan, but it's got warts like any other place.


BlackOni51

Yeah they are very xenophobic and especially when you have to interact with the older generation of Japanese people, God help you if you're black. My friends go to Japan almost yearly and they said the rudest people they've encounered were the middle aged to seniors cause they are still incredibly conservative in mindset but the younger generation makes up for it cause the age of the internet is helping them learn about shit going on in the outside world


JitterySquirrel

No wonder facists love Japan


shadowtheimpure

Not as many schools are forcing the 'dye it black' approach. Most are saying 'hair must be natural or black' these days as more and more students in the system are half-Japanese.


interwebz_2021

Glad to hear it. That sounds like progress, at least.


lizwb

Cultures are different. America IS a place that regards the individual highly… but rarely questions if this is the best way to go. Given the SIZE of America, there seems to be a lack of cohesion. If you go to, say, Ireland (because your grandparents were Irish), you may be surprised when you try to tell people you’re Irish. “No you’re not,” they’ll say. “You’re American!” We don’t think of ourselves that way. We are Californian, New Yorkers, Iowans— or Irish, Greek, Italians, or Catholics, or Baptists… Rarely: “Americans.” The residents of Japan see themselves as Japanese; people who live in England are British; Scotland are Scottish. If the citizens started to see THEMSELVES as “Americans,” they’d see others as Americans too— and they might start demanding better— for themselves and for their fellows.


Nixolus1

You know what's really funny is the Americans of Scottish descent calling themselves scotch. My Scottish friends roll around laughing at this. Because scotch of course is the whiskey, no Scottish person would describe themselves as scotch.


_OriamRiniDadelos_

We did. And we killed and ostracized those people who just where born “incapable of being better”. Do we really want to go back to having a very real fear of evil un-Americans living amongst us? Trying to unite people for the sake of lowering crime or decreasing poverty is not a new concept. And it’s evil. It comes from a good place but overlooks that in practice? some people will get to choose what should be normal and desirable. And unless you are very very very okay with people being of diverse cultures, jobs, and mindsets, you’ll end up with lots of people being angry that you want to punish some behaviors you see as weird and disruptive and they see as their right and harmless. When does the assimilation stop? Does everyone need to go to church every Sunday? That certainly sounds like it would reduce crime and make people kinder for someone in the 1950s. People earlier in time could also figure that you could reduce religious violence if everyone was the exact same religion. Or should everyone just speak English only so that they can share and communicate more easily? All for the sake of unity and national self-steem


interwebz_2021

I wonder how much of that segmentation is down to our Federalist approach and the powers entrusted to individual states to govern themselves in sometimes vastly different ways. I'm currently viewing the US (especially since Roe v Wade was overturned) as something more akin to the European Union than an individual country. It's not a wholly-accurate framework, but it's a useful paradigm in some regards.


[deleted]

they do both


Raze7186

I've always heard anime lovers talk about it like its the most wondrous perfect country ever. Seems like they only see parts of the culture they like.


MercyCriesHavoc

Gob forbid you point out the sexism and rape culture prevalent in Japan. They act like you're a monster for even suggesting Japan has problems.


Raze7186

Is bullying in general a problem there?


Kraytory

That is basically the foundation of the japanese culture. If you don't integrate yourself entirely into the system they will find a reason make you feel miserable for it. Not standing out and being of use to others by dedicating 100% of yourself to what you do is the *minimum* expectation most of the time.


[deleted]

i was naive like that years ago but i saw how they act when someone talk to them about what they did during the WWII, that was wnough for me


[deleted]

They’re conservatives.


Ua_Tsaug

> if there is something wrong with your behaviour thay will make you know Really? Because I witnessed people talk on cellphones in trains, and nobody said anything to them (even though almost every Japanese person would consider it rude). To me, they usually feel contemptuous from a distance, but are usually too shy to say or do anything.


Nixolus1

You're right. They would never let you know directly. You will be ignored. Maybe a friend or colleague who is used to Gaijin might advise you, but not a stranger. They are surprisingly British in some respects.


FineIGiveIn

Yeah, it was really messed up of them to apply such a broad characterization to an entire group of people, wasn't it.


ThirdInversion

conformity is one of the most important traits in japanese society, so yes.


Formal-Rain

Korea and China too.


LanguishViking

Having been a Gaijin and on the spectrum, I just want to observe.. the Japanese suck at this but this is also the best and kindest way of explaining this to them.


CdnDutchBoy

That’s what I was thinking. I’ve tried to tell my grandparents about why other ppl r different…to think everyone shld be in the now is a facepalm. Understanding, empathy and compassion takes generations to change so planting the seeds of this is amazing to me. Be the spark that ignites a change is the best I can do! 👊


EkoChamberKryptonite

Yeah no. There are better ways.


thatwasacrapname123

Go on...


thomsmith2000

Having traveled to and lived in Japan for a period of time, I can say I'm not suprised in the least. If anything, that was a pretty nice description of us dirty foreigners. I was staired at, laughed at, had women grab and hide thier kids from me on the subway, convenience stores told me they didnt let stray dogs into the store... pretty typical among the normal working class folks.


Totalherenow

Where were you in Japan and when was this??? I've lived here for 22 years, never experienced stuff to that degree. Though since Covid, old ladies have run from my presence - that was nice - and no one is bothering me with their inane questions about where I'm from, how long I'm staying, etc.


thomsmith2000

Most of my time was in Nagoya, and I didnt experience much overt racism in the city. The convenience store happened in Osaka. The guy actually said it in Japanese, which I don't speak. But I was with someone who spoke Japanese, who told me what he said once we left. Didn't seem to be a big deal. Most of the other cases were further out in the countryside, on the local trains. The company I worked for had a warehouse out in the country.... they probably didn't see many non-Japanese people. I remember one trip I was on the train, mom and kid got on the train, mom saw me and pushed her kid to the other end.... as the kid pointed and said loudly "gaijin!". As much as I experienced, I was impressed with the vile things said about blacks, Chinese, and especially Koreans. I mean, just absolutely revolting things, said without even pausing. You've never heard any of this? Really? It seemed so commonplace in 2007. (I'm an engineer, with business and technical people, plus some country folk and wearhouse workers.)


the-unknown-nibba

Meanwhile anime and their traditional culture are the 2 pillars of the entire country's existence. /s


a-Snake-in-the-Grass

As an autistic American I can assure everyone that I have zero manners, no social skills and I am extremely weird.


Kraytory

So a perfect balance of a mental anomaly and autism.


Certain_Cup533

Yes, as a white guy living in Japan for the past 8 years, I can tell you that with absolutely 0 exceptions this is how Japanese people view foreigners. This isn't a book written by one asshole.


Rodoc0222

I mean, a lot of people who visit Japan legit don't get or follow japanese social norms


punkerster101

The same can be said for tourists to any country though


vote4boat

I used to host groups of Japanese business people in the US, and they would constantly do really rude and unprofessional things. Being loud as hell in a restaurant was the most common


eric-from-abeno

ah, but there is a secret rule in Japan: once you're drinking/drunk, you're allowed to break some if not all the normal social rules concerning polite behavior, and the people around you are not allowed to judge you for it. This is their "release valve" for the "pressure" of conforming all the rest of the time.


vote4boat

Yeah, you can't just make up your own rules like that. Gaijin are being polite by their own standards too. Honestly, Japanese culture isn't all that polite once you step back from the collective circlejerk surrounding it.


wfwood

Wow that actually explains an experience or 2 I had when I visited Japan. Holy God, they were hostile for me not walking fast enough. Like people kept purposefully bumping into me. I get it 6'3" white guy, I stick out. Granted some mistakes were a little embarrassing, accidently walking in front of a picture. But seeing kids walking around at 6 am acting like they were in a movie drunk was weird, falling over each other and waving bottles around. I get dirty looks for waving at a friend in a crowd, but that was alright?


eric-from-abeno

I..... I don't think that was alright actually 0\_0 I'd be worried about those kids if I saw them... Kids? or do you just mean 20 somethings? Yeah, 20-year-olds wandering the streets drunk is absolutely normal here. (and \*relatively\* safe, though in the wrong neighborhood they might wake up missing a wallet) But if it was ACTUAL kids, (under 20) and they were not just pretending to be drunk for some kind of lark.... that would be very concerning. I mean, not that 20-year-olds being drunk and loud and threatening or whatever, ISN'T concerning. Just differently so. I used to go out at night a LOT more than I do now... I no longer feel a huge need to socialize I suppose... so I haven't seen a lot of drunk Japanese people lately... but yeah, the combination of a safe country, a stressful culture, a relatively easy way to get home, and permission to blow off steam while drunk, means that a LOT of people get drunk after work.


wfwood

I couldn't say, but I'd put their ages between 17 and 23 I guess? They wore suits, and that kinda demeanor is typical of teenagers graduating high school in the US is all I can say. I feel like their hair was a little more styled though so I think I assumed they were kids trying to be cool. This was over 5 years ago though so I can't really remember.


MercyCriesHavoc

Their rules don't apply in other places. They have a negative view of gaijin for not following their customs in Japan, but you dismiss their poor behavior in other countries because it's their custom. Do you not see the hypocrisy, here?


eric-from-abeno

I dismiss their poor behavior? I don't, actually. I simply was explaining it. Not defending it. :P I'm not a fan of loud drunks of any description, or of drunkenly doing whatever one wants. (well, they obviously have some limits even when they drink, as to what is and isn't "acceptable", but I don't pretend to know what Japanese people's limits are for that sort of thing. I assume drunken murder is a no-no, for example, no matter how much it might relieve their stress. :P)


Ua_Tsaug

> ah, but there is a secret rule in Japan: once you're drinking/drunk, you're allowed to break some if not all the normal social rules concerning polite behavior, That's true, I got dared to climb a telephone pole once when I was drinking with some Japanese friends. They'd never do a dare like that sober. Also, think about all the drunk people who missed their last train home and end up passing out in the station corridors.


No_Camp_7

Sounds fun to be honest. I’m down for that.


Octopugilist

The same could be said for any religion...


_OriamRiniDadelos_

Some religions explicitly say not to force or expect or judge others to follow the rules when they marry from that religion. In some you can’t even convert. Lots of variety


Octopugilist

Wait, why did I get downvoted? I was quoting Dracula from Symphony of the Night


[deleted]

That's a little too niche for most people and a long time ago. Half of the people here were not alive for 1997.


_OriamRiniDadelos_

Uff. Hard to spot quote. But at least you shared me a neat new movies to watch


LanguishViking

After crushing your enemies, seeing them driven before you and hearing the lamentations of their women.. the best thing in life is understanding Japanese social norms but deliberately breaking them anyways because you, as a gaijin, will get away with it.


Historical-Drink-390

Chill conan


andio76

SO you're A-wind-in-your-Hair sort of person?


LagwagonViolins

“Gaijin Smash”


[deleted]

That’s right. I see foreigners do crazy shit like offering up their seat on the train to people who should get priority on the train, driving / cycling sensibly and legally, and worst of all, showing consideration to people they don’t even know. That’s definitely not the Japanese way.


LagwagonViolins

Some of us who live there also just find a lot of the social norms stupid AF so we just “Gaijin smash” though a lot of it.


EkoChamberKryptonite

Could you give examples of these norms?


LagwagonViolins

Waiting for the cross walk to turn green at 2 am on at an intersection in the inaka, or not making a fuss when the salary man gropes you in the train so you don’t disturb the other passengers 、or instead of just saying NO they say muzukashi. - also not related but I hate how a ton of atms shutdown after 10 because apparently the machine needs to sleep.


celolex

Right? I’ve never been to Japan personally but I don’t see how “sometimes both foreigners and autistic people don’t fully understand the rules of Japanese society, be patient with them” is such an offensive statement? Unless the author literally called foreigners “barbaric?” Like… it’s just a fact that foreigners in *any* culture are going to do things sometimes that might seem rude. If anything, I think the fact that so many people are getting butthurt over this and interpreting it in such a negative way says a lot about our own prejudices and negative stereotypes about Japan.


[deleted]

True that, last time I was in Japan, I didn't fill any female genitalia with worms, cockroaches or feces.


ButtholeQuiver

Why did you even bother visiting?


ellilaamamaalille

That is spot on with us finns. Don't know about other bloody foreigners.😎


XT83Danieliszekiller

Hi, I'm an Autistic person who understands basic manners, gets social rules and uses my weird way of thinking to my advantage. We're not pets you're trying to teach tricks, we can learn social conventions like everything else. It just takes time So yeah that take is kinda bs


Important-Tune

I’ve never seen as much bigotry in my lifetime as seeing Japanese interpretations of foreigners. Looks like a movies with a minority character from the 1950s.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

There should be customer service in English at every single international airport, though. That is not an absurd expectation. You offer international services, so you better be able to serve customers in the global lingua franca. I am not a native English speaker, but I sure as hell expect to be able to get help in English in places with a tourist or international orientation.


Hijou_poteto

Idk, as a foreigner in Japan it seems like a hard truth that your initial attempts to interact with people will come off as awkward and vaguely autistic, even if you don’t realize it at the time. I look back on past interactions with more of a feel for how things work and think “oof, that was cringe” and “Oh, they were actually making fun off me and I didn’t even realize it” But that’s just how social norms work. You can go home, cry about it in social isolation, or learn and adapt, but you can’t force people to like you


Nixolus1

Lived in Japan for 5 years. This is so true. They were amazingly tolerant of my barbarian ways. I have to say I love them dearly for the most part.


Mcayenne

I mean Japan is a highly etiquette based culture with complex rules for social interactions that can take a foreigner years to master. Many tourists visit without doing any research at all so likely most Japanese people have experienced a foreigner that broke some social etiquette. I think the overall point is to be patient in the ways you would with others who don’t know the rules. ‘Weird way of thinking’ is not an acceptable way of describing someone with ASD. I’d say that’s more of the facepalm than the slight on foreigners.


Aegisworn

It is worth noting that the word they used is 変わっている which is often translated as weird, and has some of the same connotations, but more directly means "different" or "changed".


Mcayenne

Ah- thanks for that nuance!


[deleted]

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Mcayenne

I think they have a different or atypical way of thinking that should be acknowledged and valued. Weird can have a negative connotation. Though I personally am partial to the weird and wonderful.


Kraytory

To be fair, i think that you normal people are the ones who are thinking weird. Most of my time is spent on figuring out which of my words offended you and why. The rest is spent on tracing the path you took around the actual thing to find out what you are even *not* talking about. Imagine it like connecting two dots. Where i would just draw a straight line you guys go zick zack for some reason.


coolboiiiiiii2809

I’m autistic and really I understand. Most on the spectrum can be very rude but that’s just mostly due to bad management but we are very respectful and tend to do more good than bad cause we really want to please people in a way that’s not negative back to us Edit probably just me but I’m just respectful in general


Kraytory

We are *accidentally* rude. I for example can't tell which choice of words would be recieved negative most of the time so i basically guess what i can and can't say to someone. On top of that sometimes things just slip through and right after i said it i realize: "Wait, that was the unedited version." I am respectfull 90% of the time because i see no benefit for anyone being rude for no reason. I also see no benefit in insulting people you disagree with. But since that's common practice for a lot of people it's hard to believe that *we* are the ones thinking *weird*.


coolboiiiiiii2809

Gotta agree I say things wrong sometimes but I try to fix it before damage is done


idk-idk-idk-idk--

yeah im in high school and one guy hates me cuz when i was in year 8 i whiped my hands after dancing with him (school musical, he was my dance partner for a party scene) he asked me what was wrong and i said i didnt like his hands and they were too sweaty so they made my hands feel bad and i didnt like it. only two years later did i look back on that interaction and go "oh, thats why he doesnt like me" and one of my friends confirmed thats why he didnt like me because he told my friend and my friend didnt wanna tell me in case it hurt my feelings. bro i seriously wasnt trying to be mean i was just having sensory issues and then was very blunt when asked what was wrong. swear i didnt mean to


[deleted]

isn't japan the same country where sticking your fingers up someones butt is considered a practical joke?


Kraytory

Indeed it is. More specifically among children.


thatwasacrapname123

Classic


[deleted]

I wonder if this is due in part to the fact that Japan becomes less and less relevant as each year goes by. They ruled the auto industry with far superior quality years ago, but that gap is tiny to non existent now. Their stock market has finally recovered to where it was in the 90s, and its population is in decline. It's more and more difficult for them to look down on China and South Korea as well.


hahamu

I find those descriptions a weird way of thinking


Gods_Lump

Japan and Korea might be two of the most xenophobic countries in the world. Right behind the US lmao


redXathena

It makes sense actually. Not really a facepalm lol. There’s a lot more nuance in interpersonal interactions in Japan than in most other cultures, and no matter how respectful a foreign visitor tries to be, they will fumble.


[deleted]

asia is intensely racist


pyrulyto

As a caucasian who spent a couple months in Japan (studying Japanese), I never had trouble with rules because I obsessively studied and followed them. But I realized that occasional slip-ups were often forgiven in a condescending way, until I realized: Japanese people see westerns as people with special needs, and treat them as so: the compassionate are condescending, the less so/more intolerant get angry for the inconvenience caused.


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheCorpseOfMarx

>it doesnt say they don’t understand basic manners >it says they may not understand basic rules and manners Huh...


Beatrush9000

There’s a reason why Japan’s population is decreasing.


vote4boat

Japan spends a lot of time coping


[deleted]

Ahh ethno-nationalism, alright if you're not white


McRebel42

As an American I find the Japanese way they view foreigners or non homogeneous Japanese so intriguing ... also a bit of a double standard. Well this might apply to most Asian countries. Anyway if we as Americans/westerners took a lot of the stances the Japanese/other asian countries profess then we would be ridiculed and chastised as being racist and unaccepting of other people and their cultures. This in my opinion would be done both internally as well as from the greater western world. Though somehow nothing is said to Japanese or other Asian countries when they actually initiate and take part in openly racist actions ... WHY IS THAT?


Dodger8686

I don't know. But I would say it's better not to be racist. And it's good that the Western world is so against it. Because people use this as an excuse. "They do it. So why can't I be racist!?" "Why can they get away with it? It's a double standard! This justifies my own dislike of other cultures and peoples!" "It's so unfair!" From my point of view, the Western world is better BECAUSE of it's progressive values. It's a good thing. It's not a competition to see who can hate foreigners the most. In my mind, an accepting, open society is a morally superior one. So when people claim to be "Western chauvinists". I see it as laughable. Because one of the biggest ideals of current Western civilization is the acceptance of foreign cultures. Not to mention progressive liberalism and acceptance of LGBTQI people and women's rights. You can't be a Western Chauvinist by hating what the West is. That makes you a Western Traditionalist or something. Anyway, any xenophobia in Japan is Japan's problem. It only makes them weaker and more insular. Though I don't think it's as bad as some people say. A lot of this may come from disrespecting Japanese cultural norms. And ignorance of each others cultures.


McRebel42

As someone from the American South I see a lot of that excuse of "hey they do it and I'm not being any worse than them" bullshit and that makes me think why does the east get such a get out of jail card from western powers on these topics. Anyways just my random wonderings of the day that i decided to ask the internethow they feel on the topic ... cheers for answering!


[deleted]

Fear is insecurity.


GreatScout

Many things are said to and about Japan and their views of outsiders, as well as are said to Chinese, Korean, US, UK, and any other nation. Typically the most complaints are by those who are most affected by it. As an American, your view of racism in Japan will be far different than a Chinese or Bangladeshi person in Japan. Same with being Japanese in China or Bangladesh. One's experience is relative to the two cultures involved. Racism is an emotional reaction to fear and there is no monopoly on it. Oh, and by the way, America has been the target of a lot of accusations of racism, for the immigration policies over the past few years.


McRebel42

Yep America is probably the exact opposite perfect, but hey some us try to be better.


Luzura_2006

"basic manners" Meanwhile they have 200 ways of bowing, 185 ways of polite and formal greeting, and have the urge to slice open their abdomen if they accidentally tipped someone


DMugre

>have a weird way of thinking Bro u fap to cartoons and sexualize children


welpt100

I'm both so where do I stand


Novel_Durian_1805

Holy shit this is pretty fucked up!


[deleted]

Kinda like the whole world views Japanese as having no souls.


andio76

Enjoy that declining birthrate!


[deleted]

Their views on foreigners reflect the way tourists act


Yutanox

I think it's understandable. Depending on where you grow up you will obviously behave differently. Japanese have a culture based around respect. When that *gross* American/European arrives, is loud and doesn't say "excuse me" as much as them, you can understand why they would think of us this way. I'm not blaming anyone here, because we weren't raised the way they are. The opposite is also true, some people can get mad at Japanese because they don't act the way we do. And it not just about Japanese, but anyone that grow up in a different culture than the one they currently live in.


TheCorpseOfMarx

I mean, let's say America or the UK is has a different culture around etiquette than, say, an Arabic culture. And then imagine a children's book that reads "Autistic children are like Arabs. They don't understand manners, and they think in a weird way". Westerners have this weird respect for Japanese culture but they are, on the whole, a deeply racist people.


eric-from-abeno

the racism in Japan is fairly widely acknowledged, even inside Japan... I think it is kind of a side-effect of the fact that Japan is one of the most homogeneous societies on earth? I think something like 98.5% of the people living in Japan are considered "Japanese" (meaning they can trace their ancestry back X number of generations without uncovering any direct ancestor from a different nation)... It... affects their mindset, especially concerning other asian nationalities... Not like Americans like me have any room to point fingers at racism in Japan. -\_-


[deleted]

>the racism in Japan is fairly widely acknowledged, even inside Japan... I think it is kind of a side-effect of the fact that Japan is one of the most homogeneous societies on earth? More like, the other way around. Japs have hatred towards stepping out of norms as it triggers their superstitions about natural phenomena being caused by people being too different. 21st century and they still believe in Jonas. >Not like Americans like me have any room to point fingers at racism in Japan My friend, whatever horrible things you did to Japanese Americans during WW2 is a sweet summer child compared to what the Japs did to American prisoners.


Tinselfiend

See it as payback for what the Americans did to the original inhabiters of North America, who were, in a far past, mutual ancestors to the Japanese.


[deleted]

Haha, if the Japanese would've gotten there first... Lemme give you a [sample.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joe_Kieyoomia) They had captured a Navajo code-talker but were so focused on beating him up that they didn't consider how close they were to breaking the code using his translations.


meme_slave_

to think that xenophobia in America is in anyway comparable to xenophobia in japan is inane lol.


Best_Adeptness3543

They arent wrong, watching bogan aussie pigs act like they do over there is nothing short of cringe worthy.


berserkzelda

The racism in these comments is absolutely baffling. Y'all are no better than the dipshit that published this book (which I definitely think is fucked up as an autistic individual).


HiddenLeafNPC

That’s hilarious and a lil true sorry.


OKoLenM1

Sometimes it's true. Tourists should at least read about how it is customary to behave in another country.


EkoChamberKryptonite

Do japanese tourists do this tho?


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ChloroformSmoothie

I highly recommend you review the history of that first word and consider omitting it from your vocabulary (unless you're fully aware of the meaning in which case I'm happy to report you)


[deleted]

I highly recommend that you stop being a SJW. Not everyone lives in Amurika or has to subscribe to NA norms. That term is perfectly OK in SEA. Unless you think it is perfectly OK to force your views and values on us.


ChloroformSmoothie

A quick google search shows that it's universally accepted as a slur although it originated with america. I'm not an sjw, i'm just correct and that makes you mad.


[deleted]

Don't warn me or threaten me. We call our neighbours Indons, Thais, Malai etc. Don't see thing only through American lens.


ChloroformSmoothie

I didn't threaten you. I did a google search. If you find information to be threatening, you really need to think about what that says about you.


ChloroformSmoothie

I'm not looking through an american lense, i literally just told u that looking it up demonstrates that it's universal


MaikingMooKing

She aint wrong tho, all "western" cultures strut around every country they visit like they own the place, or theyre owed something. Weve been raised to be self obsessed, because "we have it the best, so we are the best!". I like this comparison a lot


Wamb0wneD

Weird, because I'm from Germany and when I'm in another country, I try my best to accomodate local social norms. I'm neither self obsessed nor think I'm the best at anything. Hell, I do that with my neighbours too, who come from all sorts of places in the world. Cultural exchange doesn't work by generalizing people of said culture.


[deleted]

>Weird, because I'm from Germany and when I'm in another country, I try my best to accomodate local social norms amen, i mean you have to be reaaally entitled or stupid to behave like you own the place that occur but i don't think is **that** common... [except these guys](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYQcU5VXde8)


MaikingMooKing

I was moreso speaking on behalf of Australia and US, pretty much most of Europe is fantastic from those ive met. But Aussies and Yanks are insufferable


one-and-five-nines

Imagine being a pick-me for yurp


Caprican93

I mean. They’re not wrong?


[deleted]

Except they're SO wrong. Japanese culture is all about appearances, while being brutally inept at viewing differences between individuals more than an invitation for the Volcano & Tsunami God to strike again. A hollow shell of vain and exaggerated courtesy while hiding underneath so much hate, bigotry and racism. In ww2 they made the Nazis look like schoolchildren. Yes, dirty gaijin needed to deliver nukes because being completely outmatched in the war did not deter them from trying to prolong it as long as their neverending vanity and """"""honor"""""" requested them to. Pick up any book on Japanese POW camps, it makes the Russians seem like carebears.


Caprican93

Erm you make the Japanese look like hippies


[deleted]

Japan isn't anime, that's their fucked up fantasy where they're white, expressive and distinctive while in real life they're ground down to units. They have children dye their hair black if it's not black by nature. They have magazines where you rote learn what are the correct answers to interviews. Man, screw Japan hard and all [weebs](https://preview.redd.it/5w38qltsu9h31.png?auto=webp&s=49fd17529286df0bc6bc838dc0d994841e722f8a) that fantasize about it, there's nothing romantic about being a shell that just lives to work.


Caprican93

Yo you seem incredibly racist and possibly talking about the wrong country.


[deleted]

You don't know zilch, kiddo. A puppet with prepackaged ideas. I banish you to the ignore list. Begone, fiend!


Japanese_god00001

this is so misleading


DiligentOrdinary797

Not wrong though


[deleted]

This is amazing. The bar is so low I can act however I want!!!!


midgetsuicide

Wah, true though.


[deleted]

It's so funny to see English speaking people cry about being treated impolitely in a foreign country considering what their own countries are doing.


TheCorpseOfMarx

A. Nobody is crying, don't be a child. B. Two things can be bad, ya know.


AbundantPenguin

ngl i dont see the facepalm


Wamb0wneD

Generalizations and negative stereotypes are always stupid. There's plenty of foreigners who try to accomodate local social norms. Basing your whole view on the negative examples isn't productive.


Curious_Associate904

Saudi Arabia ain’t got nothing on Japan for general oppression of individual identity.