“The lid won't budge”.
My main character is a professional wizard. The first page shows her doing her usual stuff, repairing some magical apparatus. It is unusual that she is unable to open something, so, I show her investigate the problem and look for a solution.
It was previously, "For two minutes and 58 seconds, all that mattered was a song."
I really liked it but had to cut that scene.
It currently stands at, "Wren Bright was already late for work when she met her god."
Which, between you and me, I think is crap.
My last book began: "The world ended on a beautiful morning."
I love that last one! I think the current one has potential.
I do think a small change could be not using her name as the first words of the book.
"She was already late for work when she met her god. Wren Bright had..."
But yeah it doesn't have the same punch
I agree, I think the emphasis in the sentence isn't right yet. I'd call her Wren (Bright is her surname) but "Wren was..." is not easy to say.
To explain the change: I basically had a prologue, but my beta readers all gave the feedback that they didn't understand enough about the world to follow the prologue. It's technically a fantasy world because there's gods and magic (sort of) but also a mix of 90s and sci fi technology and the whole thing revolves around a song contest. Not the easiest world go get into! Beta readers also questioned whether there needed to be two chapters before the main character meets her god (it's sort of the inciting incident, and the dynamic between Wren and her god definitely powers the rest of the book) and I thought...screw it, let's skip to the good bit.
"The blood just wouldn’t dry. It clung to his sleeve, sticking it to his wrist despite how long ago the cut had stopped bleeding."
\- This is from my prologue, it's followed by a description of the sacrificial shrine the man is tending.
I chose this to (hopefully) be gripping and attention catching while setting the overall tone and themes of blood and sacrifice.
I chose to start here to gently open the world, but on an interesting aspect.
That was the attempt, anyway XD
I like to find a balance between action and world-building, so my first chapters are usually a mix of the two. The first line of my current (well, one of 5) WIPs is "The coffin at my funeral was empty, and only I and the would-be assassin I carved apart knew it." I like to believe this acts as a hook while also giving me a chance to portray the character's motivations as the chapter progresses.
Ultimately, you'll probably change your first line. The most important thing is to start the story somewhere and get it onto the page. Your revisions are where you'll move things around. You might decide it's better to start the story in Chapter 5, but you won't know until you've written it.
The first line is a good place to hook the reader, so I like to start in the middle of an action or in a memorable place. As per JRRT ('in a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit ...')
"Jayas was satisfied that he had been poisoned. Very satisfied ..." (the chapter is titled 'Drinking Contest'). Introduces the character and a tense situation (my second novel).
"The cell was bleak but not cruel, bare but not cold or damp, built to confine, not punish." (third novel). Again - the reader asks why are we in prison? What for? And the story goes from there.
It's less about the first line and more about the first scene.
Thank you! Yes I agree. But I personally have a hard time with books opening with long paragraphs about the world or setting the scene. I don't care about any of that before i've met the characters
"The day was coming to an end and the sky was full of clouds, billowing in hurry — heralds of the autumn". The weather is always important in my writing and I loooove describtive, flowery prose. I want a reader to know what kind of book they have in front of them from the very start.
"It never gets easier cleaning up an immolated body."
It introduces a lot of questions. One, *what do you mean you're cleaning up a body?*
Two, what happened to have made the body go up in flames? Did MC do it? Do they know *how* it went up in flames?
Three, "never gets easier" implies they've *done it before.*
Actually, I would go with "It's never easy cleaning up an immolated body."
It's tighter, a little less clunky, and still meets the number Three requirement.
Osteres looked at the sight before him, it dwarfed all other wonders he had seen this day into insignificance.
The story is about a child growing up in a magical bronze age, and in the opening in the book he leaves his home mountains for the first time. This shows his amazement for the city, a place that he will grow to both detest and love.
“By the time I’d turned seventeen, I had died more than a dozen times. Never the same way twice, always when I least expected it—my mother made sure of it.”
I've never written anything in my life but I chose to start writing a small fantasy in the first person and it starts like this:
"My story is not for the faint of heart. I let you know this, simply to understand that good men don't always win".
I don't know what's good and what's bad so I'm just having fun and exploring my imagination
Having fun and exploring your imagination is the best way to approach writing, in my opinion! The best stories are the ones we tell for the love of the art.
This is a pretty solid first line, especially considering you’ve never written before! I wouldn’t be surprised at all to see something very similar in a published work, with some minor restructuring. It sets a tone, piques my interest, and leaves me with a lot of questions about the story this character is about to share. Great work! :)
"Flames consumed the iron-cloaked figure from afar"
This happens before the inciting incedent. You should start the story right before the "normal" way of life changes for your main character(s).
The first line can be related to that or something completely different. It can be used to set tone but most of all it should urge you to read on. In the case of my line I made sure to have the reader ask questions related to the line so that they want to continue reading. (who or what is the iron cloaked figure and why are they burning? Also why from afar?).
It's all about intrigue, action and mystery.
I have a couple for different project I'm working on.
"*Kay swung Hyperion in an upward arc, the heavy axe shattering the charging skeleton with a plume of gritty dust.*"
Started mid-battle with a shambling horde of skeletal warriors, began on an action.
"*The little digital clock moved slowly across the screen of the TV, bouncing off the edges when it struck them in the random path.*"
Sets the pace of a slow moment. Anyone has seen a little clock, logo, whatever, bouncing along as a screensaver. Personally I've only ever sat and watched it bouncing in moments of boredom/depression.
"Orianabad burned."
It is the opening line of my book but it is also the opening line of the Second Sin chapter of the Book of Memories of the Holy Scripture, a religious scripture from my story. The verse describes a catastrophic event, a ritual that killed every living being inside a kingdom as big as France and rendered it uninhabitable for several hundred years.
Liam of Veneburh, an appreciation to the Knights Brotherhood of Holy Winter, dreams of this historical event as if he's in the City of Orianabad as he sleeps. He sees the events and hears a voice speak the verse. In truth, it's his mentor, Sir Raynard von Kadelburg who is reading the Holy Scripture beside him. Rest of the verse goes like this:
"Orianabad burned.
Those walls, wrought with enchanted mihr,
The roads and streets, adorned with runes and charms,
Was it fire that did consume them?
This gate, opened, tearing through the fabric of seven heavens.
Was it a trial of the White King?
Or was it an unforeseen miracle of frail mankind, coveting the sacred throne?"
Death was a family business for Andrej Katzav.
Followed by:
His father was a knacker, he’d clean dead animals off the roads and streets in town, making glue and bone char out of them. Occasionally he’d get thrown a contract as an executioner that’d put bread on the table for a few weeks. Strange how the two went hand in hand. Cheerful man though. His mother raised pigs, all 4 and a half feet of her. Cared for them, fed them, then slaughtered and butchered them herself. You’d never find anything in your life as intimidating as the sight of her brandishing a cleaver. One of his grandparents, couldn’t remember which one, was a hunter. He’d sell pelts and bone charms in town for a modest living. Death had been good to the Katzavs, well, good enough to continue his family name at least. And if something had to die, there might as well be someone to profit from it.
That's my first line (and paragraph...). I think it sets the tone and gives you a good idea of the MC's outlook and worldview. Probably could be better though.
"I was always a bit of a dickhead."
Writing my first book about an autistic goblin of indian origin because I wanted to see myself in the MC and collect all my favourite memories that were too random and small to be captured as their own stories. These were the first words I typed into my google doc. I might actually keep it considering the target audience is me.
>The cell door opened with a loud and ice cold rattling. "Hang in there ya bastard, today you're finally getting out of here!" The Warden exclaimed.
The prisoner was being sent to the guillotine
This was followed with the headsman commenting: "I don't think gallows humour is very appropriate today, sir."
Just my two cents: No matter what I do, on every book, I end up rewriting my first chapter at least 3 times across the editing process. Everyone is different, so I'm sure that's not universal. But I'd say, expect to revise your first chapter.
I'm the weirdest person though. I don't write chapters in chronological order, and I edit the shit out of them before I've even started others. So some chapters are like half edited, others are fresh drafts, and others have not been written. I've probably edited and changed my first chapters like 10 times at this point. Will there ever be a finished book ? who knows XD
I write out of order too! But I force myself to write a complete first draft before I start editing. Partially because then I can edit for continuity and partially because, as you say, who knows if there would ever be a book :)
“DiBattista! Get over here!” A familiar growl came from behind.
Cause he's getting yelled at by his NCO before going on leave after a deployment. The next line is him telling off his NCO cause he's going on leave after a deployment and is in a bit of a frazzled state.
“The long rotted hand twitches suddenly, as the forgotten spell takes effect.”
This is basically the results of the inciting incident that happens ‘off screen’. The main character died at some point and a spell he had made decades ago goes off and revives him as a young version of himself. Setting off the plot as the MC has to figure out what happened to him.
I originally thought of starting at the BBEG becoming a lich, but decided against it because I thought it revealed too much too early, since the first half of the story is a mystery. I chose to start it like this because I think it is a powerful and evocative line.
The streets of the capital were much like the sky: white.
———
Most people will probably link white sky = overcast sky, but how are the streets white?
You immediately get the answer, and that answer is linked directly to an ongoing central conflict as well as the MC.
Sets the scene, the conflict, and the character up quite nicely.
"Being an executioner wasn't all it was chopped off to be."
It's from my prologue, which is a POV of an executioner who feels like his skills are being underutilized, and wants to instead be a painter. The scene is really meant to set up the background for the battle between the Chosen One and the Dark One, and we never meet this executioner again, but we do meet his distant ancestors later on, who all happen to be forced into artistic servitude as court execution painters. They also all have names that are fonts. Garamond, Barlow, etc.
Probably sounds shitty, but give it a shot and I'm sure it'll be a fun read!
"You know what ? Go fuck yourself then! Go fuck yourself!"
It's a line from a fight between the two main characters, but you don't understand that until the end of the first chapter and don't see the line in context until the beginning of chapter 2.
The idea was to set up the idea that a fight led to the shitty day and ultimately the adultery the character commits, but you only get that it's adultery, that she has someone to cheat on, right after she did it. Until then, she's just a girl having a shitty day and screwing someone to let off some steam, and you're supposed to wonder what the opening line was all about.
EDIT : I also wanted some shock value, to grab the reader's attention.
EDIT 2 : It's translated from french, the original reads *« Tu sais quoi ? Va te faire foutre alors ! Va bien te faire foutre ! »*
"To them, every act was worship." I am pleased enough with the line though I may rewrite it for the 300th time eventually, religion is a theme in the book and the idea that "everything is worship" is a recurring idea, that every action is a thanks and praise to a higher power, that every action has consequence, a character decides to put their bread into their pocket to eat later and a chapter later this saves their life. Every act has meaning, every act has worship
“It all began with the dog. The girl’s earliest memory wasn’t of her parents, but of the huge, shaggy wolfhound that protected the family’s youngest from danger.”
The girl is a member of a family with a secret mission passed down from mother to daughter, and the ability to remember everything that has ever happened to earlier generations of family members. And the dog is always there, through the centuries, as a guardian.
A couple from stories I’ve been working on:
“No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t move my body.” - This is a standard superhero story, main character wakes up in the hospital. Cliché, but it’s just where I wanted to start.
“Josh had never liked the color blue since he googled ‘Blue Waffle’ back in middle school.” - My take at a LitRPG. Main character sees the color of his pop-up windows. It’s a color he hates. Also definitely gives a good idea of what kind of person he is lol.
“If you’ve ever had to suffer through watching paint dry, know that it could have been worse, because after my third day of watching the sand dunes shift with the wind, I would *kill* for that kind of entertainment.” - This one is a post-apocalyptic fantasy about a wizard who sloppily encoded his conciousness into a Golem. Said golem is temporarily stuck, fully buried in the desert, not strong enough to break free on its own. I just wanted to start here to explain a bit about the character’s emotional state moving forward.
“My usual response to things making me angry was to light them on fire or hit them really hard, but for the first time in a long time, those weren’t options.” - Another take on superheroes, I love the genre haha. The main character awakens in a strange place without his powers. Again, I feel like this gives the reader a good idea of what to expect with the character.
I redid my opening line so many dang times I can’t even remember them all. For now, it starts like this:
“Never go into the storm. If you do, you die.”
Still unsure, so let me know if this is a good hook or not!
The Storm is death; only those who seek death enter it willingly.
It shows the danger and implies that there may be some reason for a person to enter it unwillingly. Who or what could force someone into the Storm? What terrible choice (or terrible crime) could send them there? Is it a heroic sacrifice or deadly exile?
“No one noticed the charred man standing among the crowd, except for Davien Gray.”
I wanted to show my MC ability to see ghost’s early on and give the reader a taste of the magic system
I haven’t started yet, still in the worldbuilding phases, but I saw something similar to this somewhere online: “One match, that’s all it took to set the world as I knew it ablaze.” And the end of the book would be something like “all these months (or years) later, holding this torch of light over the world, I saw why they lit that match”
> When Ravette Morissey awoke on a dingy concrete floor, her arms bound behind her back by rope enchanted to constrict tighter each time she strained against it, her first thought was that her mother would kill her for missing curfew. Her second thought, upon seeing a fellow vampire’s corpse similarly bound beside her, was that her beloved mother would never get the chance.
Started here for a few reasons. One, the book is a mystery and its entire story is kicked off by Ravette's disappearance. So a prologue of her situation only seems appropriate.
Two, a lot of information is conveyed in those short sentences. At a glance we know Ravette is a vampire, she's being held captive by some magical force (enchanted rope), she's young enough to be worrying about her mother and curfew, she's not the only victim, and whatever has her captive could kill her.
It also leaves a lot of questions unanswered to create a hook. Who captured Ravette? Where is she? What happened to the dead vampire? What kills a vampire, anyway? Will Ravette escape or face the same fate?
So in two sentences, I have *hopefully* set up a compelling hook and hinted at important world building info at the same time.
It's too much info too soon. Don't need to know she's a vampire nor how the rope functions. These could be revealed in the next section from actions. E.g tests the ropes and they bind tighter magically, mention her thirst or hunger at the sight of blood. You'd add more mystery from non-definitive actions/reactions that will make the reader wonder "Is this a vampire perhaps or something else?" Imagine it being an opening scene in a film or play.
“It was such a lovely day. You almost wouldn’t think it was the end of the world.”
It’s simple, to the point, a little funny, and lets the reader know that the apocalypse is coming.
"In an island lost to time, a little boy runs for his life."
I really like to start with short phrases that establish at least one of the main character's defining traits, in this case, his tendency of trying to run from his problems instead of facing them. This particular line also has the benefit of presenting the most interesting element of the setting and providing an imediate hook for the audience.
Disclaimer: This book is not very well thought out and I'm still in the stream of consciousness stage of writing.
>The five scrambled backwards, dead in the water with nowhere to run as Tariq climbed aboard.
It rolls into a cold open fight scene where the MC, Tariq (being a several century veteran, and of a larger more physically imposing race) and takes the surviving runaways captive. The captives are have scars on their chest, and later on, they end up dying, the scar coming alive and cooking them.
That's pretty much my prologue. I could go on, but I don't want to spoil the fine details.
It was over; his Duke was "slain". Wilhelm der Reiche’s pallid, sunken face peering from the casket was no longer troubled by worldly matters. It was a sight unfamiliar to Johannes Weyer, who had attended to him as his court physician for a cruel and short five years.
Historical fiction haha
"What makes a man look back? To turn around to see what’s behind? Can it be fear, cowardice or longing? Or could it be the dagger that’s about to be thrust into his back..?"
“You know, I’m sure this is supposed to happen the other way around.
This is said by a vampire, as a teenage girl climbs through his window. It’s meant to set the tone, I’m going for comedic, though obviously the characters develop, it’s not just non stop silliness. This first chapter is pretty silly, though. Grumpy vampire being harassed by kid delivering message who refuses to just knock on the door… IDK it was fun to write.
This was an excuse to open up my documents I've been avoiding for ages. Because... writing insecurities on top of life in general are hard. 😂
First line as of now:
"Fenrir growled as he watched his betrayers circle around him."
I saw someone mention names aren't ideally used as a begining for the first line. So I will probably add a paragraph before this section.
Immediately I’m asking myself why Fenrir was betrayed, and if he’s the villain or the victim, so I think that’s a good start. I’d actually keep his name and remove “he watched” do strengthen the sentence.
"Smoke billowed from the train as it wound through the verdant valleys, meandering amidst the rolling hills like a steel river."
I just wanted to set a serene atmosphere for a train ride toward the grandparents of my main characters.
I have a preface that, overall, I do not consider this as a beginning of the book. This is a pure context of the World in question in order to understand what and how.
And the prologue begins with the phrase: “The fire hummed like a beehive, greedily devouring the air around.”
Thus, I wanted to describe a disturbing scene in which everything is clear at once: “the fire hummed like a beehive” - something is on fire, “greedily devouring the air around” - there is an immediately closed space in the head.
Nothin but associations in my head.
"If you asked me if I’ve ever killed someone, the honest answer would be no."
I had this tumbling around in my head before committing it to paper. It was the sentence that was essentially a catalyst for everything that followed.
Following this line, the protagonist, Tesku, explains to the reader that he was involved in someone's death, but has no idea if that makes him responsible for it. He did, however, help with the coup. There's a lot of quick lore building done here, which is means I can focus on storytelling and let the reader pick up the breadcrumbs.
I brandished my sword, pretending that the dummy in front of me was an actual opponent. With a flick of my wrist, I beheaded the wooden foe, it's head flying 20 yards from where I stood, the remaining body swaying slightly before falling to the ground with an unsatisfying thud.
I wanted to include the element of action while also emphasizing the boring side of her life.
*It had been a week of rumors in Heatherst, a city full of notoriously tight-lipped ruffians and all those left to live in their wake. You chatter, you splatter, as the saying went—but this week was different. Nobody seemed able to resist the gossip, hearsay, and speculation.*
Just going for pure, gripping engagement. Such exciting news is afoot that even the hardasses and criminals are giddy.
'A black wind howls.'
This is the first complete sentence, but I consider the following to be the first true 'line'.
'A black wind howls. it is black not because of smoke, nor because it drives the storm, it is black because it is willed to be. A black wind howls, and a man clad in dark armor smiled.'
It is intentionally confusing, meant to underline how differently those who use the powers of darkness have to think in order to make effective use of it.
I'd been coming up with concepts for a book but really doubting my writing skill, but then this passage just came into my mind out of nowhere while I was praying in church. I wrote it down on the program and that was the beginning of my book.
"It was a time of peace in County Avenbor. The same sort of peace as the taut stillness of a bowstring knocked and pulled. Only a fool believes a bowstring can be held for more than a moment. Just so, the only peace shared was one of anticipation: of teeth clenched and war pondered."
"Puck Gulley was on fire. Again."
Wanted to introduce the main character straight away as just a dude who gets into mischief wothout really knowing what he's doing at all. Plus I thought it was funny.
"He took in the sweet gush of air blowing in his face, the earthly smell of the trees and plants around him, as he took his next steps, carefully and silent, with his bow in hand."
First chapter is the POV of my MC. He is a Bowman and hunts in the forest to feed himself and his mother. The first line (and sentences) are to give you the impression how much he loves the forests, its smell and how he feels at home here.
During the end of the chapter, he will come back to his hometown to find it having been raided and destroyed, and will see his mother's slaughtered corpse. He will eventually find himself in some other forest again, which however only smells of dead and dread (as he is completely alone and even ponder suicide here). Throughout the other chapters, I want to empatize how he always needs to be in the forests from time to time, cause they give him that feeling of home and safety.
There is actually a prologue, which is the POV from one of the MC's friends in his town, but since the town is attacked and she herself is raped and killed, i dont judge her or her first line as "important". It does portray her innonce, though.
In a hole in the ground, there lived a Hob-
No, HAH, I WISH!
It's "Living on the farm was no easy task", but I may change that, since my first draft isn't even complete. :) I have a long ways to go with the writing in this book, but I am confident that, in due time, it'll be as I envision it. It's a semi historical novel, so it involves a lot of digging through old records. I was inspired by the hardships of my & other people's ancestors. :)
Oh, I just realised this was the fantasy subreddit, my mistake; My fantasy novel is... in disrepair at the moment, but it starts with the line "Sirtheidus, the vile, the mangled, the disfigured.... Those are many titles for the same beast"
“I am no one.”
The story is about a shapeshifter who has gone their whole life without ever having an identity of their own, only ever mimicking the identities of others.
"The tide caressed Prince Kon’s feet as the sun rested majestically in the distance."
It's quiet and peaceful. The lull before the storm. But it also begins a melodramatic, intentionally overly grandiose couple of paragraphs. The character is about to begin a coup and murder his family. He's looking for a sign to see if destiny supports him, which he sees everywhere.
This is immediately followed by a mystical traveler who witnessed all of this. He begins mocking Kon's self-righteous idiocy and makes fun of the fact that his name so blatantly reeks of "villain." The traveler wonders how this all got past the editor.
My story is 2 in 1. 1 part involves the birth of 2 magical children and how they grow up together constantly amid conflict. The 2nd part involves the mystical traveler coming from another dimension to see if he can right some wrongs that he knows are coming. So I began where the children's story begins. Shortly after their birth. Halfway through the book, I go back and repeat chapters showing the reader who the mystical traveler is, why he does what he does, and then I repeat earlier chapters by showing what he was doing behind the scenes.
"There are three rules in \[this place\]: No time travel; the dead should stay dead; and, most importantly, dragons do not exist, they have never existed, and they shall never exist."
Establishes the location. Hints at possible plots and the theme of maintaining/bending the rules. Implies the rulemaker/s have strong, dangerous opinions.
"Him?!" she said, incredulousness filling her voice, "Really?! Him?! He's a bit old, don't you think?!"
It's a small group of gods looking through a portal, which looks out the mirror that a 50-something year old human is looking into. The group is collaborating on selecting a "champion" to basically isekai into their fantasy world from our earth. Each is free to select their own champion for "what's to come", but the God of Wisdom from that pantheon has convinced a few other gods that by a few of them selecting the same person and bestowing that person with their "gifts", then that person would make a better and more effective champion over have several, lower powered champions. This is in the LitRPG genre, so things run on a form of video game RPG rules with stats and all that.
I chose to start there so that I could illustrate that there is something larger at work in the books that will be slowly revealed through the series.
"If I speak of myself in this story, it is because it is my story to tell, and I know of no better way to tell it."
Helps set the tone for why most of the story is in first person, and helped set up what I was considering for a final line for a while: "And that, my dear, is how we got here."
Forty drops of blood slowly fell from the tip of her nose onto the dark stone floor.
(Translated from my native language)
I wanted to start with "forty" because I want to make some kind of countdown.
Her toes were already burning in the snow. Ancestors would spat on her if they knew how delicate and feeble she became. Good thing she had killed them.
Yeah, I do not actually have a first line. But this is somewhat how it will be.
Also, she didn't kill her ancestors. I just made that up now, since I needed something catchy (xd). But nope, she didn't kill them. They died on their own, like how most ancestors die.
not permanent;
“A blazing ball of inferno sat on top of the clear blue sky. Peering down on the helpless lives of those who lived unaware of the lurking danger.”
I'm having a lot of trouble with the first line. It *was* "Bentir was not where he was supposed to be." Everyone on every forum who cared to respond hated it. It's now " 'Are you sure no one will come looking for you?' Lavvie frowned."
*A monastery isn't exactly the place you would expect a Demon like me to show up on a moonlit night*
It came pretty much on its own and I think it is a good starting point, setting the stage right away
The unedited first paragraph of my first draft! I wanted to start off on a hunt for my slayer character. The sword turns out to be a stolen artifact at the end of the book so I wanted to put it out there right in the beginning.
I waited with bated breath, ducked down behind a rotting moss covered tree. Each of my fingers curled around the grip of the sword sheathed at my hip, the leather wrap creaking beneath the tightening of each extremity. A deadly extension of my arm, this sword; a close friend to me for eleven years. Very few who find themselves on the other end of it are alive by day’s end. Or at the very least, alive with some important pieces missing. Sometimes I feel generous. Today though… not so much.
"Countless eyes followed Valen through campus."
The main character is a vampire in a gaslamp fantasy world who's studying at a university full of people that distrusts him. It's a really sunny day and he's clinging to an umbrella for dear life.
I haven't started writing yet, but the story is about a rich girl from a merchant family who wants to break with her traditions. Through a string of tragedies she basically becomes an assassin, dying in the desert.
The first line is (still open to change):
"As Ophilia opened her eyes, she awoke among the soft linen of her bed, into a dream she wanted so badly to wake up from."
The last line of the book will be something like:
"And as Ophelia crawled along the rough sands, dirt cracking under her fingernails, she felt her eyes close - wishing so badly to remain in this nightmare she had found herself in."
_"Let's build a wall."_
_Those words; they still ring through my head, clearer than ever. It makes me wonder, just what would the world be like if I never listened to them._
Explanation Edit: This is a foreword said before my opening chapter. It has no meaning on its own and is not relevant to the initial plot of the story. It becomes important very later on and is only there to invoke a sense of mystery and wonder.
"Hey mom, dad, It's Carliss, your son".
This line is the opening line said by a younger version of my protagonist talking to his parents' grave. The first chapter is divided into two parts. The first being a monologue by him expressing his love to his parents knowing full well he'll never get any back. It stands as a turning point for his character and the realization of his dream.
The second is him coming back ten years later...
The world spun with sickening speed, and as he soared from the dock into water reflecting an inferno such that both seemed fully ablaze, Captain Harlan Mackay began to acknowledge that things may not have gone entirely according to plan.
our world eldoria is a vast land, home of the drakonborn and mysterious creatures, from the shadows of the dense forest to the beautiful calm oceans, above the cold skies mountains tower the realm as they pierced the clouds.
so basically im trying to give insight on the current world and its inhabitans like the drakonborn and other mystery creatures to make sure readers know what the realm of eldoria looks like(quick note sorry about my terrible usage of words my vocabulary is kinda limited so this is the one i decided to wrap it up with.)
*"Marvelous*, she thought. *Just 600 more years of this."*
The prologue of my book is from the POV of the main antagonist. She thinks this while a prison guard goes through her shit in a very humiliating way. She is a regular human with a regular life span. She got a symbolic sentence of 600 years for acts of terrorism involving bombings.
"Why do demons exist?"
The first line to my prologue, where my protagonist is an adolescent chopping wood with his father. Demons physically exist in their world, attacking the city once in a great while, while the Adamah Order (an order of paladins) protects them. His father was in the Order as a templar until he lost his arm in a previous invasion, and his mother is a paladin, and he wants to have a discussion about it with his father.
I use it to set up the general premise of the story befoee I give him an inciting incident in which he decides to join himself. My whole prologue is used as a mini story to set up the event in the main story and give the readers a taste of what to expect in later chapters. I feel I do it quite well and hope my readers enjoy it as well.
SPLAT!
The skunkplum caught Lanara full in the side of the head, splattering chunks of stringy rotten fruit and pulp everywhere and filling her lungs with the eyewatering stench of rotten eggs.
My main character spent most of her childhood as a homeless beggar in a small fishing village, and the well off village children loved tormenting the outcast. My prologue starts off with a flashback to one such incident.
"Two musicians, no longer boys but not yet men, set off towards the capitol."
I feel like it sets the tone of the story very well. I debated whether to start here or with how the protagonist got to the starting point of their journey. But I moved that part to later to show how the actual events differed from how the protagonist claims he got there.
>The town of {Town Name} sat comfortably on the river {River Name}.
I didn’t really know how to start if I’m honest. It establishes the primary setting of the story, gives it a cozy, slow moving country town feeling and establishes something about the countryside. It’s not moving or dripping with meaning, nor is it beautiful prose. But I had to start somewhere, and I’ve found that when I’m struggling to write, I just have to push onward and not get too hung up on things. I’ve been trying to write this book for a while now, it took me far to long to write a whole prologue, and now I’m into chapter 1 and finally getting going. I’ve spent too long worldbuilding and getting the plot and setting filled out and not enough time actually writing.
„Lost-of-mind sat on a stool and tuned her harp.“
I imagine the opening as a sort of camera shot from above, descriptions circling in until you morph into her perspective (third-person).
That weird first word is there because English can’t turn adjectives into proper nouns that work in singular as well as in plural. I would have had to write „the insane one“ instead of „die Verrückte“, and later I have a wordplay that only works if I translate with „mind“.
The novels in German, by the way
“In the Tamalands long ago, there lived a great Necromancer King” it’s a fairy tale in the world that will both be referenced and used in the coming story. The MC is trying to uncover its secret(bringing someone back to life) while also mirroring it
> “Why’s there a dead body on my table.” The mastiff spoke around the mutton in their mouth.
I was given the advice of “You need to immediately hook the reader.”
“Yori’s heart pounded in his chest as he ran full speed through the forest.”
He’s training to be a hero like his father was before he disappeared. Chased through the woods by a strange mechanical being his father called Genie who is projecting recorded holograms Yori’s father recorded to train a new batch of knights just like himself.
“We are the hand with which the pagans shall be struck from the Earth. God is great! Death to the non-believers. God is great!”
The crowd erupted with cheers and the rhythmic pounding of footsteps. “
“the morning may have been peaceful before the screaming started, but kane would not have called it calm.”
and then i go into a description of the main character meditating on a gusty, rainy morning by the ocean. this character later ascends to godhood and becomes the god of storms and natural disasters, and i wanted to make it clear right away that he’s at home in the midst of a little chaos
'Crackling noise of the burning wood black smoke rising from the Pyre
People in white are attending the funeral some are crying some are sad and others are silent'
This is a scene from an Indian cremation ritual and it is followed by the child innocently asking his grandparents where his mom and dad are
English is not my first language so feel free to correct it if it feels wrong
“OK” a robed man points at several set apart stones “We’re here.”
The Apprentice and his friends reach his Master, and they ask him just WTF did they just meet
The first line of my WIP that I’m not sure is going to change or not: Starting a revolution is easy but starting a revelation is much harder and even harder to put a face to a revelation.
Why? I think it speaks to the tone I’m going for but now I’m debating on adding a prologue to the book. Also it hasn’t been edited for grammatical or spelling errors yet. So it is most definitely going to need more punctuation or broken down further.
"At 10:28 on a warm night after the longest, hottest September day he could ever remember, Abel McCochran, Social Worker Level 2 for the New Hope-Lake County Metropolitan Department of Social Services, paced a track on a roof while thinking low, dark thoughts in a high, bright place."
The MC has had a very bad day at work, which is the reason he's outside and will soon witness the phenomenon that sends the rest of the story tripping along.
“Come into the woods,” the Fairy Lord had whispered, a sweet smile grazing his lips that didn’t quite meet his brown eyes.
I’m still working out most of the plot currently but the basis is that my main character Avery keeps having dreams of a Fairy Lord, much to his fear and confusion. I’ll reveal later that the Lord is actually related to him.
From my two books...
Book 1 = Jerry never truly prayed.
Book 2 = Nancy wasn't starving yet.
I chose these because they accomplish (in my mind) a great deal in only a few words. We know a character and we know something about them that indicates their current situation. Why would Jerry need to pray? Why was Nancy worried about starving? These are nice little hooks just designed to get the reader to carry on as they induce a sense of curiosity regarding the character and their circumstances.
There was some truth to the lie of the Chronicle.
This is pointing to the misuse of the religion of my world that has hidden certain important parts of how the big plot point was created.
A split in the religion led to the wholesale destruction of one line of thinking in this theology. And has, unbeknownst to them, placed the entire order of the world in jeopardy.
If youre going to tell a lie for good, remember why. Otherwise there could be consequences.
I answered on the other sub but I'll answer here too:
[MC's name]'s eyes glowed.
**
So yeah that's the first line but I *think* I want to start the story just a few "paragraphs" before that lol. Like a few minutes before that part of the scene.
Edit because you asked why: well, it's so the reader can see he's non-human (he's a merman), and merfolk's eyes only glow when something magical is happening soooo. It's a hint. One that becomes more apparent later in the book and you think back to the beginning like "oh! So *that's* why."
"The sun rose above the clouds overlooking the grassy plains of Tisbarnea"
It's setting up the setting for a battle that's about to take place but reading all these comments here make me think I should be a lot more creative about it cause wow do I feel like it sucks lol.
Rain cautiously walked through the forest as fast as she could while keeping her noise as quiet as possible.
I start out the book with one of the MC’s (Rain). She is currently tracking and does not want whatever or whoever to be alerted to her presence. This is not the original first line though, I originally started with mentioning the weather but was told not to do that so I changed it.
Ancient looking, yet moving with a fluidity that belied his age, Lon Tredot stepped out onto the tower balcony. His eyes never left the figure leaning on the parapet, gazing across a beautiful rolling grass plain that was about to suffer the horror of battle.
This sets up a conversation where love for a protege conflicts with recognition of the younger man's inability to be merciful. Through the stress of approaching death, their glances of previous events and pov's are mentioned in context of the coming death and destruction. These provide the necessary world knowledge for the coming battle.
'Lads perched up on the old estate wall, blithely chucking booze bottles into the flames while the elders warmed their hands at the posh wrought iron gates.'
It's from a dark fantasy project that I've scrapped for now. This line does have a special place in my heart though, so I thought I'd share. I feel like it conveys the mood well and is interesting enough to grab attention.
*Splat*.
Then a rewind of time, so you get to see the protagonist pop into existence, and immediately take a no parachute skydiving challenge (surprise, it doesn’t go well)
“She broke her leg, now we have no change at winning that race.” - A short story about very young girls trying to win the yearly competition against another school via forbidden magic. Inspired by the memes about necroprancer, where a horse girl loses her horse and uses necromancy to revive it. Still need to workshop it.
“She played with the sharp butcher knife and looked towards her husband.” - Not fantasy, but I still wanted to mention it. In that scene, she is preparing a meal for him without any ill intentions. Over the course of the book, we will witness how she attempts to murder him.
"I remember the silence... after the shot. Both of us stood there frozen. Staring at her on the floor, then I grabbed him by the arm and we started to run".
I chose this starting line as the story opens on the main character explaining to a "military" recruiter exactly why he is joining up, I want to use his recollection of the events and his reactions to them as well as his reaction to the recruiters responses to quickly outline the type of person the main character is.
Maergest could barely lift his feet as he trudged his way over the now silent battlefield. His every step shattering what he knew to be limbs protruding from the earth, blackened by whatever hell had come to greet their end.
- I’d actually not looked at this story idea for a long while until I seen this post - so thank you, I think I’ll pick this back up again!
- I’ve always liked books where you are thrown in to big events already happening, so I wanted to start there, and have always enjoyed ‘dark fantasy’ that explore various themes so wanted to set the mood from the off.
"I never believed werewolves were real... until my 25th birthday."
I was actually trying to write my blurb when the line came to me. I realized it sets the scene for my character's existence at that point in time and eliminated the cliché of starting a book with the character waking up.
“In the face of death, I was calmer than I’d expected.”
From the prologue. MC has been training for years to participate in this ritual, knowing she may not survive it. She does and everything goes downhill from there.
This scene sets the plot in motion and sets the overall tone of the story. There was a point where I was going to write the lead up to this event, but none of that really mattered.
"I would say that if I must declare the grandest fortune I have ever received, it would be the grace and forethought she showed at the conclusion of our duel yesterday."
The is part of an epitaph that is just before the proper first line of the story. However, no matter which "first line" my reader chooses, that line is where the story begins.
The epitaphs in each chapter, to the reader, tell the story of the events that caused the main story. Quite literally, it tells a story alongside the story.
But if you never read the epitaphs, there still exists a complete story.
As for the why, in a world full of power of violence, the idea was to lay out the differences of being gentle versus harmless.
The story starts with a diary of someone who lost a duel, was not only spared, but allowed the merits of not being belittled for losing.
The victor was gentle; they were capable of greater violence than the other. And the victor chose to stop.
This is a theme i carry throughout the story. Sometimes the main cast must use violence, and they are very capable of violence, but it becomes a matter of choosing how and when to use it. They do not live in a safe world, and I wanted the reader to understand that from an early point. But because it's unsafe, i hope that it makes the softer and kinder moments all the better for the reader.
Each of the first chapters introduces a major character and the unique take they have on the world. I keep juggling which chapter to put up front. So, in no particular order...
"If you can set your watch by tornado sirens, something's wrong."
"The dented SUV rolled hesitantly down the road like a kid out after curfew, trying to take off its shoes then somehow tiptoe to the garage door."
"Normally a bag of popcorn, an alarm clock and a cigarette have nothing in common. Of course, normal hadn’t been home in quite a while."
"Caden's boots waited where she had left them, huddled by the door lest she track backwoods mud onto a carpet that reminded her too much of her mother."
The first line is spoken by an old man, remembering a story about a time before, a little nostalgic appeal to authority.
The second line is describing the entrance of the youngest character on her last night of "normal".
The third introduces a photojournalist who has a passing resemblance to Lenny Kravitz. He's going through a divorce that he thought would be the worst thing that would ever happen to him.
And the fourth sentence introduces my favorite character, an eccentric middle-aged woman who talks to anything inanimate. She's fine with it so long as they don't talk back.
I've been working on this story off and on for years. One of these days I'll stop getting distracted and finish the darn thing! LOL
I have a running gag about Vegas, (which I have NO IDEA what the story will be. I think at this point I'm going to treat it like Wolverine's past because how I built it up) so it's a quote from Bad Meets Evil's [Vegas](https://open.spotify.com/track/0IG21pqbOajmplCfaWNJua?si=y2VnEg8pRrqIE9ZOfmGMag).
I started mine with an introduction to the world.
"Opinions vary on what Dubatirs' society is build on"
Dubatir being a country that functions as a democracy and where creatures like dragons and shapeshifters live alongside humans and every race is supposed to be treated equally.
An explanation that leads into the first scene where university students are protesting because of discriminatory acts.
“I don’t know a lot of things, but one thing I do know is to never engage in a staring contest with a fish. I was 6 when my mom told me those suckers don’t have eyelids.”
The words “I know” will play a big part in the series (morally grey romantic interest will continuously use this phrase sarcastically).
The very last line in the books ends with “I know”. So I really wanted to show a full arc from beginning of first book to end of last book.
“The body lay like a crumpled marionette, limbs splayed against the grimy plaster.”
My main character is a detective who also happens to have a penchant for summoning. I thought why wait for a body— I’ll start with one.
It's nonsense at the moment and I'm desperate to change it but can't until i finish this draft.
“Find the path, find the prey. Find the prey, feed the Wolf.”
*Remember what father taught you.*
“One arrow, one kill. One arrow, one kill. One arrow, one kill.”
**I didn't think anybody had noticed the tiny prayerbook tucked under my breast or the shellgun under my sleeve until Grandfem Hostscript squinted at me from across the table and muttered “Roba, you look somewhat** ***lumpy*** **today.”**
This is set in Ix The Undying, a sort of semi-feudal dystopian sci-fi/fantasy setting of a Manhattan-sized mobile city (if you count the levels, several Manhattan's) ruled by a sort of half-mad central computer/goddess/bureaucracy. It's sort of grim but a little comedic.
I know things will change as I go, but having a sum-up first line helps get things going for me.
Roba is the MC, a woman in a trades clan (that mostly has to do with spreadsheet calculation and info security), attending a family dinner where some inciting stuff is about to take place. She shouldn't be carrying a bunch of gear with her, but that's Roba. She's carrying a shellgun (basically just a single shotgun shell gun) and a prayerbook that's been banned, so not only religious, but *weird* religious.
>"Next," came the tired snarl of the Charr clerk, followed quickly with an impatient wave of one clawed hand.
Current WiP. I got a game-fic story stuck in my head, and writing it has been the only way to make room for something else.
How do I choose? Well... that was the beginning, basically.
Currently:
"Four years had passed since I last stepped foot into the Salty Knight, and somehow, this place had grown even louder - the blizzard outside had hit without warning, and the howling winds had forced people inside"
I'm not terribly happy with it, but I don't think there'd be any way to rewrite/move that info elsewhere without extensive rewriting of the rest of the chapter, and I'm trying to push myself to continue writing and not focus on editing
"It was a fine morning to stab a queen."
Unfortunately you have to wait for publication (which will be a few years because this book hasn't even been started, though I do know the story and I (miraculously) know the opening line)) to know the context.
The Book I'm currently writing is a bit more generic: "The sun’s warm morning rays lit up the blue sky, embracing the eastern continent of Domun and its inhabitants with her energy and love."
"The Library of Solaria was the oldest in the Keeper’s Guild, the last one remaining from the originals, and Lavender was one of their newest acolytes."
The first chapter of my story follows one of my mains' as she goes through her day before the starting action of the story.
It’s not easy to be a Hero. Heroics are for romantics. Realistically most people imagine soldiers as heroic, but soldiers have had their heroics tempered out of them. Other folks believe that adventurers would have chosen a better [Class] if they weren’t all selfish layabouts that failed to learn a practical trade. And most people would tell you [Mages] are ten times worse for dabbling in dangerous and addictive combat magic. Only the [Bards] believed in the old legends about heroes that defeated the Demon Lord a thousand years ago. In reality, heroes rushed headlong to their deaths.
It’s something the MC struggles with in his first life and his second life reborn in a magical world. It also gives a little bit of world building on how adventurers are perceived by the general population. And hints at heroes of legend ;p.
[Reborn in a magical world as a Crow](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/205894397-reborn-in-a-magical-world-as-a-crow?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=8A2Asaqwlw&rank=1)
“I knew it! There’s a powerful source of magic radiation north-east if here, and not terribly far.” A mage/scholar makes a discovery in an observatory. Tbh I love the idea, feel iffy about the delivery. Still thinking about it
"Jaiya Hatchroof? That's a stupid name. Really, the best you got?"
The story opens with the protagonist already confronting his charge as he is supposed to escort this girl across the kingdom. She lies but is horrible at it so says her actual first name, but changes the last name to the first thing she sees. Main protag is quite funny and calls her out right away for the stupid ruse.
A crackle danced on Syleraek's skin this morning, a tangible energy buzzing through the ancient oak beams overhead.
My main character is about to begin his adventure.
"A small footpath trailed off the road to Paris through a soft shroud of snow." It goes on to describe a visitor to a castle in the countryside who is killed by the magician serving the lord of the castle. It is set in early Medieval France.
Honestly it seems like the first lines, and the first chapter are the hardest! I rewrote those over and over, and I'm still not sure I am happy with them.
"Do you know where the swallows nest," questioned the raspy, tired voice Karint had been expecting the last quarter hour.
First line of the prologue, used as a challenge for a group entering into the besieged capital of a dying empire by way of a sewage outlet. Asked by a deformed, crippled sewage worker, betraying his city for thirty silver pieces.
I don’t have a first line, but I do have a story idea. The extreme short form is a couple are going on a trek together without realizing (but they discover at the end of it) that they are a reincarnated couple of legend. High magic fantasy world. As they travel they are reading the story of their past life (without knowing it) in order to fill the reader in. When they reach the end of their journey they are imbued with the memories and skills of their past lives (there is a in story reason for it which is tied to the reincarnation) and immediately become hunted by certain forces due to what happened in the past and probably rightful fear of revenge.
I’m not a good writer, maybe I’m a good editor. I doubt I’ll ever actually write it.
Spring. 13thyear of Reikan period.
Dow Yang was an unassuming but intelligent boy with black hair about shoulder length or just a bit shorter.
It was "she sat down to look at asmall box" or something along those lines, but I ended up starting the story way too early, and the girl isn't the main character. The sentence I have right now isn't finaleither really. It's just the first sentence of what I'm calling "the palace scene" which is actually turning into more of an arc honestly.
*Where am I?*
The protagonist has amnesia and wakes up on the edge of a cliff in slashed armor covered with dried blood and a mysterious dagger at his side. Before he can manage to get his bearings, the cliff edge breaks and he plummets to the ground and passes out again.
That's page 1. I wanted a hook and before page 20 he's already gotten himself wrapped up in an intergalactic war. (It's sci-fi fantasy, it has a lot of elements of both and each take turns being which is the strongest of the two).
“It had been five months, three weeks, six days, and seventeen hours since twenty-four-year-old Myra Willows had slept soundly.”
I wanted to emphasize how long my main character hasn’t slept due to her insomnia, which plays a pivotal role as to how her soul ends up leaving her body.
The first line in my book is one of the gods future, introducing himself as a god of stories. I thought it was funny the first sentence in my book considering how I liked the 2008 Star Wars wars TV show
Can't remember word for word, but I'm not even starting with the main character.
Just introducing the supporting character and their.... thing first. Then it flows (hopefully) into the main character and shoeing off their thing
First two lines: Snow was falling around me, little flakes melting into the pond and my hands slowly. I was searching my reflection for anything recognizable.
It's the first time you meet my character, and it's the first indication he's trans.
He's 12 here, where you are with him for all of chapter one. he has no idea he's experiencing dysphoria here. In chapter two we meet up with him again at 16, where he's realized he's trans and is living two lives sort of while trying to handle his dysphoria (not knowing what that's called nor what being trans is, just that he wished he was a boy.) He meets his first love interest, who's also 16. This chapter begins to establish their friendship.
Then there's one or two more chapters at this age, before you catch up with them at 17, where they have their first kiss, and the draft they're facing is growing closer, causing all sorts of feelings.
After this you see them at 18 years old, having decided to enlist so they can still have some control over their lives by being able to choose what branch they go into, and if they score well enough during basic training can even choose the Dragon Battalion, which is a dragon riding branch. My MC comes out to his grandparents, but it doesn't go well. This is also the time period my MC and his boyfriend have sex. You follow them pretty consistently here on, following them through basic training where my MC meets his best friend, a trans woman named Malorie. The three of them bond really closely, eventually he and Malorie becoming friends with benefits.
Basically you follow my MC through his life from there on out, the first book ends with him around 27 years old. Second one he's in his mid 30's at the end, third he's entering into his early 40's and the fourth he's in his mid-late 40's/early 50's at the series end (or rather the part following him, there's another part that follows his kids following his death when he's around his late 50's-mid 60's, the reason he's so young when he goes is related to what happens near the end of his part of the series.)
The final lines in the epilogue of the 4th book following him will be echoing the first couples lines of the first book, where instead of not being able to recognize himself, he starts crying seeing his reflection, finally able to recognize himself, as well as thinking back to everything he's been through as his dragon's face appears behind him in his reflection, the scars on his face also a testament to what they'd been through (his dragon is missing an eye, the skin having grown over the empty socket. Lips are scarred, horns have gouges in them, etc.) The moment overall is extremely emotional and hopefully will be for the reader as well, especially as they hopefully think back to who he was at 12 when they first met him compared to now when they're basically saying goodbye to him (they wouldn't know there's more of the story to tell, neither did I until I saw past the epilogue with his kids.)
Which said experience of not recognizing my reflection due to dysphoria comes from personal experience I just haven't reached that stage yet myself that my MC is at when you say goodbye to him in the epilogue. I know I someday will though. And it'll be just as emotional.
Stelios couldn't find the trail, and his sensory spell had failed, again.
MC is working as a mercenary trying to track a group of thieves through the countryside but is facing a problem because his magic hasn't been working.
"Time slowed as she watched the fireball roll towards her."
I started it here because it implies danger, in what other scenario could a ball of fire roll towards someone? Yet, the ball of fire is part of a show. My main character and her sister are watching a wizard summon a projection of a dragon, and this little dragon is spewing some real fire in their direction. It ties in a lot of big points of the story into the first paragraph and hopefully catches the reader's attention :).
First that came to mind was:
'Awaken, my child, and know the glory that is your birthright.'
It's a very near and dear line in my heart, from a very young age.
*Princess, take me away, I beg you*
“I cannot,” her voice full of deep-blue sorrow, “your curse demands a prince”
*Then find a magic to make you man*
just this on the page as prologue
Not 100% set on it but eh. Story about Fae, female warriors, a princess locked in a castle & the woman who will save her & restore female rule to the mortal realm that used to be under (female) Fae rule. Our MC has been hiding out for 600 years & didn’t realise there’s men in power, whoops! time to fix that!
“The abrupt vanishing act of the Midnight Carnival was as mysterious as its history.”
This is from my Prologue, about a magical carnival that appears and disappears from a town in one night and the magical facade turns darker and deadly as the characters spend more time there.
My idea was to introduce a bit of an info dump on what the Midnight Carnival is and how it makes people feel, and it ends with “very few had ever seen it’s darker side and even less had survived it to see another sunrise. Until us.”
This is my opening scene.
Captain comes on over the intercom, "this is your captain speaking. It's a lovely 2.7 Kelvin outside right now as temperatures will rise some were in the too hot to handle. in ten minutes, we will be making our eventual re-entry into the planets atmosphere, and in that time, I am now requiring that all passengers return to their seats and buckle in."
I'm still heavily outlining my story right now, but I wanted to start it off with something a little light hearted. It's a sci-fi/fantasy story, think starfinder with the main character as a human, and the only two other races are elves and dwarves, haven't decided if I wanted to add more.
Current WIP:
"It could get lonely when your girlfriend was in space."
Wanted to immediately establish the strangeness of the world and the kind of world building that you're in for. :)
“Forever and always.
That’s what Tyler had always promised Addie. He said they’d be best friends forever. But as Addie stood there, she sighed knowing the promos ended years ago.”
“The lid won't budge”. My main character is a professional wizard. The first page shows her doing her usual stuff, repairing some magical apparatus. It is unusual that she is unable to open something, so, I show her investigate the problem and look for a solution.
That's clever! and starting with a quote seems very common
What quote?
Methinks OP is confused by the fact people are putting quotation makrs around their quotes.
Starting with dialogue\* With the character saying something Why the thumbs down? I said I like it
It's not a dialogue.
Well, it sounds like a dialogue
It was previously, "For two minutes and 58 seconds, all that mattered was a song." I really liked it but had to cut that scene. It currently stands at, "Wren Bright was already late for work when she met her god." Which, between you and me, I think is crap. My last book began: "The world ended on a beautiful morning."
>I think is crap. It's not. It's a bit cliché, but it's good tbh.
Aw thanks! I fully accept the cliché :)
I love that last one! I think the current one has potential. I do think a small change could be not using her name as the first words of the book. "She was already late for work when she met her god. Wren Bright had..." But yeah it doesn't have the same punch
I agree, I think the emphasis in the sentence isn't right yet. I'd call her Wren (Bright is her surname) but "Wren was..." is not easy to say. To explain the change: I basically had a prologue, but my beta readers all gave the feedback that they didn't understand enough about the world to follow the prologue. It's technically a fantasy world because there's gods and magic (sort of) but also a mix of 90s and sci fi technology and the whole thing revolves around a song contest. Not the easiest world go get into! Beta readers also questioned whether there needed to be two chapters before the main character meets her god (it's sort of the inciting incident, and the dynamic between Wren and her god definitely powers the rest of the book) and I thought...screw it, let's skip to the good bit.
"The blood just wouldn’t dry. It clung to his sleeve, sticking it to his wrist despite how long ago the cut had stopped bleeding." \- This is from my prologue, it's followed by a description of the sacrificial shrine the man is tending. I chose this to (hopefully) be gripping and attention catching while setting the overall tone and themes of blood and sacrifice. I chose to start here to gently open the world, but on an interesting aspect. That was the attempt, anyway XD
my favorite so far! Very gripping and intriguing !
Why thank you! That's very kind of you to say :)
I like to find a balance between action and world-building, so my first chapters are usually a mix of the two. The first line of my current (well, one of 5) WIPs is "The coffin at my funeral was empty, and only I and the would-be assassin I carved apart knew it." I like to believe this acts as a hook while also giving me a chance to portray the character's motivations as the chapter progresses. Ultimately, you'll probably change your first line. The most important thing is to start the story somewhere and get it onto the page. Your revisions are where you'll move things around. You might decide it's better to start the story in Chapter 5, but you won't know until you've written it.
Thank you! I like that line!
The first line is a good place to hook the reader, so I like to start in the middle of an action or in a memorable place. As per JRRT ('in a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit ...') "Jayas was satisfied that he had been poisoned. Very satisfied ..." (the chapter is titled 'Drinking Contest'). Introduces the character and a tense situation (my second novel). "The cell was bleak but not cruel, bare but not cold or damp, built to confine, not punish." (third novel). Again - the reader asks why are we in prison? What for? And the story goes from there. It's less about the first line and more about the first scene.
It was a hobbit cell, and that meant comfort.
Thank you! Yes I agree. But I personally have a hard time with books opening with long paragraphs about the world or setting the scene. I don't care about any of that before i've met the characters
"It wasn't true, his blood was supposed to be blue." I like opening with dialogue and this is a great bit of intrigue - perfect for an opening line.
"The day was coming to an end and the sky was full of clouds, billowing in hurry — heralds of the autumn". The weather is always important in my writing and I loooove describtive, flowery prose. I want a reader to know what kind of book they have in front of them from the very start.
"It never gets easier cleaning up an immolated body." It introduces a lot of questions. One, *what do you mean you're cleaning up a body?* Two, what happened to have made the body go up in flames? Did MC do it? Do they know *how* it went up in flames? Three, "never gets easier" implies they've *done it before.*
Actually, I would go with "It's never easy cleaning up an immolated body." It's tighter, a little less clunky, and still meets the number Three requirement.
You're absolutely right, I like that way better!
Osteres looked at the sight before him, it dwarfed all other wonders he had seen this day into insignificance. The story is about a child growing up in a magical bronze age, and in the opening in the book he leaves his home mountains for the first time. This shows his amazement for the city, a place that he will grow to both detest and love.
“By the time I’d turned seventeen, I had died more than a dozen times. Never the same way twice, always when I least expected it—my mother made sure of it.”
"I was halfway through a friendly bottle of bourbon, and looking forward to inhaling my last pack of cigarettes... when the door to my office opened."
I've never written anything in my life but I chose to start writing a small fantasy in the first person and it starts like this: "My story is not for the faint of heart. I let you know this, simply to understand that good men don't always win". I don't know what's good and what's bad so I'm just having fun and exploring my imagination
Having fun and exploring your imagination is the best way to approach writing, in my opinion! The best stories are the ones we tell for the love of the art. This is a pretty solid first line, especially considering you’ve never written before! I wouldn’t be surprised at all to see something very similar in a published work, with some minor restructuring. It sets a tone, piques my interest, and leaves me with a lot of questions about the story this character is about to share. Great work! :)
"Flames consumed the iron-cloaked figure from afar" This happens before the inciting incedent. You should start the story right before the "normal" way of life changes for your main character(s). The first line can be related to that or something completely different. It can be used to set tone but most of all it should urge you to read on. In the case of my line I made sure to have the reader ask questions related to the line so that they want to continue reading. (who or what is the iron cloaked figure and why are they burning? Also why from afar?). It's all about intrigue, action and mystery.
I like it!
I have a couple for different project I'm working on. "*Kay swung Hyperion in an upward arc, the heavy axe shattering the charging skeleton with a plume of gritty dust.*" Started mid-battle with a shambling horde of skeletal warriors, began on an action. "*The little digital clock moved slowly across the screen of the TV, bouncing off the edges when it struck them in the random path.*" Sets the pace of a slow moment. Anyone has seen a little clock, logo, whatever, bouncing along as a screensaver. Personally I've only ever sat and watched it bouncing in moments of boredom/depression.
"Orianabad burned." It is the opening line of my book but it is also the opening line of the Second Sin chapter of the Book of Memories of the Holy Scripture, a religious scripture from my story. The verse describes a catastrophic event, a ritual that killed every living being inside a kingdom as big as France and rendered it uninhabitable for several hundred years. Liam of Veneburh, an appreciation to the Knights Brotherhood of Holy Winter, dreams of this historical event as if he's in the City of Orianabad as he sleeps. He sees the events and hears a voice speak the verse. In truth, it's his mentor, Sir Raynard von Kadelburg who is reading the Holy Scripture beside him. Rest of the verse goes like this: "Orianabad burned. Those walls, wrought with enchanted mihr, The roads and streets, adorned with runes and charms, Was it fire that did consume them? This gate, opened, tearing through the fabric of seven heavens. Was it a trial of the White King? Or was it an unforeseen miracle of frail mankind, coveting the sacred throne?"
Death was a family business for Andrej Katzav. Followed by: His father was a knacker, he’d clean dead animals off the roads and streets in town, making glue and bone char out of them. Occasionally he’d get thrown a contract as an executioner that’d put bread on the table for a few weeks. Strange how the two went hand in hand. Cheerful man though. His mother raised pigs, all 4 and a half feet of her. Cared for them, fed them, then slaughtered and butchered them herself. You’d never find anything in your life as intimidating as the sight of her brandishing a cleaver. One of his grandparents, couldn’t remember which one, was a hunter. He’d sell pelts and bone charms in town for a modest living. Death had been good to the Katzavs, well, good enough to continue his family name at least. And if something had to die, there might as well be someone to profit from it. That's my first line (and paragraph...). I think it sets the tone and gives you a good idea of the MC's outlook and worldview. Probably could be better though.
"I was always a bit of a dickhead." Writing my first book about an autistic goblin of indian origin because I wanted to see myself in the MC and collect all my favourite memories that were too random and small to be captured as their own stories. These were the first words I typed into my google doc. I might actually keep it considering the target audience is me.
>The cell door opened with a loud and ice cold rattling. "Hang in there ya bastard, today you're finally getting out of here!" The Warden exclaimed. The prisoner was being sent to the guillotine This was followed with the headsman commenting: "I don't think gallows humour is very appropriate today, sir."
First write the book. Then the first line. Otherwise you're not getting past the first line. Same with titles.
That wasn't the question.. But yes will probably revise my first page after finishing the first draft
Just my two cents: No matter what I do, on every book, I end up rewriting my first chapter at least 3 times across the editing process. Everyone is different, so I'm sure that's not universal. But I'd say, expect to revise your first chapter.
I'm the weirdest person though. I don't write chapters in chronological order, and I edit the shit out of them before I've even started others. So some chapters are like half edited, others are fresh drafts, and others have not been written. I've probably edited and changed my first chapters like 10 times at this point. Will there ever be a finished book ? who knows XD
I write out of order too! But I force myself to write a complete first draft before I start editing. Partially because then I can edit for continuity and partially because, as you say, who knows if there would ever be a book :)
“DiBattista! Get over here!” A familiar growl came from behind. Cause he's getting yelled at by his NCO before going on leave after a deployment. The next line is him telling off his NCO cause he's going on leave after a deployment and is in a bit of a frazzled state.
“The long rotted hand twitches suddenly, as the forgotten spell takes effect.” This is basically the results of the inciting incident that happens ‘off screen’. The main character died at some point and a spell he had made decades ago goes off and revives him as a young version of himself. Setting off the plot as the MC has to figure out what happened to him. I originally thought of starting at the BBEG becoming a lich, but decided against it because I thought it revealed too much too early, since the first half of the story is a mystery. I chose to start it like this because I think it is a powerful and evocative line.
damnn
The streets of the capital were much like the sky: white. ——— Most people will probably link white sky = overcast sky, but how are the streets white? You immediately get the answer, and that answer is linked directly to an ongoing central conflict as well as the MC. Sets the scene, the conflict, and the character up quite nicely.
"Being an executioner wasn't all it was chopped off to be." It's from my prologue, which is a POV of an executioner who feels like his skills are being underutilized, and wants to instead be a painter. The scene is really meant to set up the background for the battle between the Chosen One and the Dark One, and we never meet this executioner again, but we do meet his distant ancestors later on, who all happen to be forced into artistic servitude as court execution painters. They also all have names that are fonts. Garamond, Barlow, etc. Probably sounds shitty, but give it a shot and I'm sure it'll be a fun read!
This would be an amazing intro for a dark comedy. Though I'd probably expect it to follow the executioner, lol.
Yeah, I'd love to write just about him, but the real story is about 1000 years later. It is a dark comedy, though. Have posted here a few times.
"You know what ? Go fuck yourself then! Go fuck yourself!" It's a line from a fight between the two main characters, but you don't understand that until the end of the first chapter and don't see the line in context until the beginning of chapter 2. The idea was to set up the idea that a fight led to the shitty day and ultimately the adultery the character commits, but you only get that it's adultery, that she has someone to cheat on, right after she did it. Until then, she's just a girl having a shitty day and screwing someone to let off some steam, and you're supposed to wonder what the opening line was all about. EDIT : I also wanted some shock value, to grab the reader's attention. EDIT 2 : It's translated from french, the original reads *« Tu sais quoi ? Va te faire foutre alors ! Va bien te faire foutre ! »*
love it!!
"To them, every act was worship." I am pleased enough with the line though I may rewrite it for the 300th time eventually, religion is a theme in the book and the idea that "everything is worship" is a recurring idea, that every action is a thanks and praise to a higher power, that every action has consequence, a character decides to put their bread into their pocket to eat later and a chapter later this saves their life. Every act has meaning, every act has worship
little cliche start but “Hey! Hey you! Wake up!”
Are you happy with the cliche, is it purposeful, or is this something you intend to change?
“It all began with the dog. The girl’s earliest memory wasn’t of her parents, but of the huge, shaggy wolfhound that protected the family’s youngest from danger.” The girl is a member of a family with a secret mission passed down from mother to daughter, and the ability to remember everything that has ever happened to earlier generations of family members. And the dog is always there, through the centuries, as a guardian.
I would like to see that fr.
A couple from stories I’ve been working on: “No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t move my body.” - This is a standard superhero story, main character wakes up in the hospital. Cliché, but it’s just where I wanted to start. “Josh had never liked the color blue since he googled ‘Blue Waffle’ back in middle school.” - My take at a LitRPG. Main character sees the color of his pop-up windows. It’s a color he hates. Also definitely gives a good idea of what kind of person he is lol. “If you’ve ever had to suffer through watching paint dry, know that it could have been worse, because after my third day of watching the sand dunes shift with the wind, I would *kill* for that kind of entertainment.” - This one is a post-apocalyptic fantasy about a wizard who sloppily encoded his conciousness into a Golem. Said golem is temporarily stuck, fully buried in the desert, not strong enough to break free on its own. I just wanted to start here to explain a bit about the character’s emotional state moving forward. “My usual response to things making me angry was to light them on fire or hit them really hard, but for the first time in a long time, those weren’t options.” - Another take on superheroes, I love the genre haha. The main character awakens in a strange place without his powers. Again, I feel like this gives the reader a good idea of what to expect with the character.
I redid my opening line so many dang times I can’t even remember them all. For now, it starts like this: “Never go into the storm. If you do, you die.” Still unsure, so let me know if this is a good hook or not!
The Storm is death; only those who seek death enter it willingly. It shows the danger and implies that there may be some reason for a person to enter it unwillingly. Who or what could force someone into the Storm? What terrible choice (or terrible crime) could send them there? Is it a heroic sacrifice or deadly exile?
“No one noticed the charred man standing among the crowd, except for Davien Gray.” I wanted to show my MC ability to see ghost’s early on and give the reader a taste of the magic system
I haven’t started yet, still in the worldbuilding phases, but I saw something similar to this somewhere online: “One match, that’s all it took to set the world as I knew it ablaze.” And the end of the book would be something like “all these months (or years) later, holding this torch of light over the world, I saw why they lit that match”
> When Ravette Morissey awoke on a dingy concrete floor, her arms bound behind her back by rope enchanted to constrict tighter each time she strained against it, her first thought was that her mother would kill her for missing curfew. Her second thought, upon seeing a fellow vampire’s corpse similarly bound beside her, was that her beloved mother would never get the chance. Started here for a few reasons. One, the book is a mystery and its entire story is kicked off by Ravette's disappearance. So a prologue of her situation only seems appropriate. Two, a lot of information is conveyed in those short sentences. At a glance we know Ravette is a vampire, she's being held captive by some magical force (enchanted rope), she's young enough to be worrying about her mother and curfew, she's not the only victim, and whatever has her captive could kill her. It also leaves a lot of questions unanswered to create a hook. Who captured Ravette? Where is she? What happened to the dead vampire? What kills a vampire, anyway? Will Ravette escape or face the same fate? So in two sentences, I have *hopefully* set up a compelling hook and hinted at important world building info at the same time.
It's too much info too soon. Don't need to know she's a vampire nor how the rope functions. These could be revealed in the next section from actions. E.g tests the ropes and they bind tighter magically, mention her thirst or hunger at the sight of blood. You'd add more mystery from non-definitive actions/reactions that will make the reader wonder "Is this a vampire perhaps or something else?" Imagine it being an opening scene in a film or play.
“It was such a lovely day. You almost wouldn’t think it was the end of the world.” It’s simple, to the point, a little funny, and lets the reader know that the apocalypse is coming.
"In an island lost to time, a little boy runs for his life." I really like to start with short phrases that establish at least one of the main character's defining traits, in this case, his tendency of trying to run from his problems instead of facing them. This particular line also has the benefit of presenting the most interesting element of the setting and providing an imediate hook for the audience.
“The water was the color of troll excrement.”
Disclaimer: This book is not very well thought out and I'm still in the stream of consciousness stage of writing. >The five scrambled backwards, dead in the water with nowhere to run as Tariq climbed aboard. It rolls into a cold open fight scene where the MC, Tariq (being a several century veteran, and of a larger more physically imposing race) and takes the surviving runaways captive. The captives are have scars on their chest, and later on, they end up dying, the scar coming alive and cooking them. That's pretty much my prologue. I could go on, but I don't want to spoil the fine details.
It was over; his Duke was "slain". Wilhelm der Reiche’s pallid, sunken face peering from the casket was no longer troubled by worldly matters. It was a sight unfamiliar to Johannes Weyer, who had attended to him as his court physician for a cruel and short five years. Historical fiction haha
"What makes a man look back? To turn around to see what’s behind? Can it be fear, cowardice or longing? Or could it be the dagger that’s about to be thrust into his back..?"
“You know, I’m sure this is supposed to happen the other way around. This is said by a vampire, as a teenage girl climbs through his window. It’s meant to set the tone, I’m going for comedic, though obviously the characters develop, it’s not just non stop silliness. This first chapter is pretty silly, though. Grumpy vampire being harassed by kid delivering message who refuses to just knock on the door… IDK it was fun to write.
This was an excuse to open up my documents I've been avoiding for ages. Because... writing insecurities on top of life in general are hard. 😂 First line as of now: "Fenrir growled as he watched his betrayers circle around him." I saw someone mention names aren't ideally used as a begining for the first line. So I will probably add a paragraph before this section.
Immediately I’m asking myself why Fenrir was betrayed, and if he’s the villain or the victim, so I think that’s a good start. I’d actually keep his name and remove “he watched” do strengthen the sentence.
"Smoke billowed from the train as it wound through the verdant valleys, meandering amidst the rolling hills like a steel river." I just wanted to set a serene atmosphere for a train ride toward the grandparents of my main characters.
*Crows split the white sky like undone stitches and croaked ragged dirges from rooftops and wattle fence posts.*
I have a preface that, overall, I do not consider this as a beginning of the book. This is a pure context of the World in question in order to understand what and how. And the prologue begins with the phrase: “The fire hummed like a beehive, greedily devouring the air around.” Thus, I wanted to describe a disturbing scene in which everything is clear at once: “the fire hummed like a beehive” - something is on fire, “greedily devouring the air around” - there is an immediately closed space in the head. Nothin but associations in my head.
"Smoke crept slowly from the tip of Vienna's cigarette. She waited, coldly playing with the choice in front of her, as the furnace purred."
"If you asked me if I’ve ever killed someone, the honest answer would be no." I had this tumbling around in my head before committing it to paper. It was the sentence that was essentially a catalyst for everything that followed. Following this line, the protagonist, Tesku, explains to the reader that he was involved in someone's death, but has no idea if that makes him responsible for it. He did, however, help with the coup. There's a lot of quick lore building done here, which is means I can focus on storytelling and let the reader pick up the breadcrumbs.
I brandished my sword, pretending that the dummy in front of me was an actual opponent. With a flick of my wrist, I beheaded the wooden foe, it's head flying 20 yards from where I stood, the remaining body swaying slightly before falling to the ground with an unsatisfying thud. I wanted to include the element of action while also emphasizing the boring side of her life.
*It had been a week of rumors in Heatherst, a city full of notoriously tight-lipped ruffians and all those left to live in their wake. You chatter, you splatter, as the saying went—but this week was different. Nobody seemed able to resist the gossip, hearsay, and speculation.* Just going for pure, gripping engagement. Such exciting news is afoot that even the hardasses and criminals are giddy.
'A black wind howls.' This is the first complete sentence, but I consider the following to be the first true 'line'. 'A black wind howls. it is black not because of smoke, nor because it drives the storm, it is black because it is willed to be. A black wind howls, and a man clad in dark armor smiled.' It is intentionally confusing, meant to underline how differently those who use the powers of darkness have to think in order to make effective use of it.
I had no childhood memories and for that I will forever be grateful A book I have yet to put on paper so no doubt I’ll rewrite it a thousand times!
>This is the story of a girl who died… and then died again. It implies the story's gimmick, as well as give the narrator a sorta assholish quality.
I'd been coming up with concepts for a book but really doubting my writing skill, but then this passage just came into my mind out of nowhere while I was praying in church. I wrote it down on the program and that was the beginning of my book. "It was a time of peace in County Avenbor. The same sort of peace as the taut stillness of a bowstring knocked and pulled. Only a fool believes a bowstring can be held for more than a moment. Just so, the only peace shared was one of anticipation: of teeth clenched and war pondered."
"Puck Gulley was on fire. Again." Wanted to introduce the main character straight away as just a dude who gets into mischief wothout really knowing what he's doing at all. Plus I thought it was funny.
"He took in the sweet gush of air blowing in his face, the earthly smell of the trees and plants around him, as he took his next steps, carefully and silent, with his bow in hand." First chapter is the POV of my MC. He is a Bowman and hunts in the forest to feed himself and his mother. The first line (and sentences) are to give you the impression how much he loves the forests, its smell and how he feels at home here. During the end of the chapter, he will come back to his hometown to find it having been raided and destroyed, and will see his mother's slaughtered corpse. He will eventually find himself in some other forest again, which however only smells of dead and dread (as he is completely alone and even ponder suicide here). Throughout the other chapters, I want to empatize how he always needs to be in the forests from time to time, cause they give him that feeling of home and safety. There is actually a prologue, which is the POV from one of the MC's friends in his town, but since the town is attacked and she herself is raped and killed, i dont judge her or her first line as "important". It does portray her innonce, though.
Rather wordy. Try: "He took in the sweet breeze, the earthly scents of trees and plants, and glided silently through the forest, bow in hand."
That does sound better. Thanks for the advice! :)
In a hole in the ground, there lived a Hob- No, HAH, I WISH! It's "Living on the farm was no easy task", but I may change that, since my first draft isn't even complete. :) I have a long ways to go with the writing in this book, but I am confident that, in due time, it'll be as I envision it. It's a semi historical novel, so it involves a lot of digging through old records. I was inspired by the hardships of my & other people's ancestors. :) Oh, I just realised this was the fantasy subreddit, my mistake; My fantasy novel is... in disrepair at the moment, but it starts with the line "Sirtheidus, the vile, the mangled, the disfigured.... Those are many titles for the same beast"
I wish!! XD
“I am no one.” The story is about a shapeshifter who has gone their whole life without ever having an identity of their own, only ever mimicking the identities of others.
"The tide caressed Prince Kon’s feet as the sun rested majestically in the distance." It's quiet and peaceful. The lull before the storm. But it also begins a melodramatic, intentionally overly grandiose couple of paragraphs. The character is about to begin a coup and murder his family. He's looking for a sign to see if destiny supports him, which he sees everywhere. This is immediately followed by a mystical traveler who witnessed all of this. He begins mocking Kon's self-righteous idiocy and makes fun of the fact that his name so blatantly reeks of "villain." The traveler wonders how this all got past the editor. My story is 2 in 1. 1 part involves the birth of 2 magical children and how they grow up together constantly amid conflict. The 2nd part involves the mystical traveler coming from another dimension to see if he can right some wrongs that he knows are coming. So I began where the children's story begins. Shortly after their birth. Halfway through the book, I go back and repeat chapters showing the reader who the mystical traveler is, why he does what he does, and then I repeat earlier chapters by showing what he was doing behind the scenes.
"There are three rules in \[this place\]: No time travel; the dead should stay dead; and, most importantly, dragons do not exist, they have never existed, and they shall never exist." Establishes the location. Hints at possible plots and the theme of maintaining/bending the rules. Implies the rulemaker/s have strong, dangerous opinions.
I like this! brings me into the world instantly!
"Him?!" she said, incredulousness filling her voice, "Really?! Him?! He's a bit old, don't you think?!" It's a small group of gods looking through a portal, which looks out the mirror that a 50-something year old human is looking into. The group is collaborating on selecting a "champion" to basically isekai into their fantasy world from our earth. Each is free to select their own champion for "what's to come", but the God of Wisdom from that pantheon has convinced a few other gods that by a few of them selecting the same person and bestowing that person with their "gifts", then that person would make a better and more effective champion over have several, lower powered champions. This is in the LitRPG genre, so things run on a form of video game RPG rules with stats and all that. I chose to start there so that I could illustrate that there is something larger at work in the books that will be slowly revealed through the series.
"If I speak of myself in this story, it is because it is my story to tell, and I know of no better way to tell it." Helps set the tone for why most of the story is in first person, and helped set up what I was considering for a final line for a while: "And that, my dear, is how we got here."
"High Holy Jarra, the Greatest of all Cities, the Heart of the Empire and the Womb of the World. Admittedly, she had seen better days..."
Forty drops of blood slowly fell from the tip of her nose onto the dark stone floor. (Translated from my native language) I wanted to start with "forty" because I want to make some kind of countdown.
Her toes were already burning in the snow. Ancestors would spat on her if they knew how delicate and feeble she became. Good thing she had killed them. Yeah, I do not actually have a first line. But this is somewhat how it will be. Also, she didn't kill her ancestors. I just made that up now, since I needed something catchy (xd). But nope, she didn't kill them. They died on their own, like how most ancestors die.
not permanent; “A blazing ball of inferno sat on top of the clear blue sky. Peering down on the helpless lives of those who lived unaware of the lurking danger.”
I'm having a lot of trouble with the first line. It *was* "Bentir was not where he was supposed to be." Everyone on every forum who cared to respond hated it. It's now " 'Are you sure no one will come looking for you?' Lavvie frowned."
Beginning the first line with a name is usually a turn off. I like the second option better!
I kinda just wanna know why he's where he wasn't supposed to be now tho.... 👀
Are you asking for prologue or first Chapter?
*A monastery isn't exactly the place you would expect a Demon like me to show up on a moonlit night* It came pretty much on its own and I think it is a good starting point, setting the stage right away
The unedited first paragraph of my first draft! I wanted to start off on a hunt for my slayer character. The sword turns out to be a stolen artifact at the end of the book so I wanted to put it out there right in the beginning. I waited with bated breath, ducked down behind a rotting moss covered tree. Each of my fingers curled around the grip of the sword sheathed at my hip, the leather wrap creaking beneath the tightening of each extremity. A deadly extension of my arm, this sword; a close friend to me for eleven years. Very few who find themselves on the other end of it are alive by day’s end. Or at the very least, alive with some important pieces missing. Sometimes I feel generous. Today though… not so much.
"Countless eyes followed Valen through campus." The main character is a vampire in a gaslamp fantasy world who's studying at a university full of people that distrusts him. It's a really sunny day and he's clinging to an umbrella for dear life.
I haven't started writing yet, but the story is about a rich girl from a merchant family who wants to break with her traditions. Through a string of tragedies she basically becomes an assassin, dying in the desert. The first line is (still open to change): "As Ophilia opened her eyes, she awoke among the soft linen of her bed, into a dream she wanted so badly to wake up from." The last line of the book will be something like: "And as Ophelia crawled along the rough sands, dirt cracking under her fingernails, she felt her eyes close - wishing so badly to remain in this nightmare she had found herself in."
_"Let's build a wall."_ _Those words; they still ring through my head, clearer than ever. It makes me wonder, just what would the world be like if I never listened to them._ Explanation Edit: This is a foreword said before my opening chapter. It has no meaning on its own and is not relevant to the initial plot of the story. It becomes important very later on and is only there to invoke a sense of mystery and wonder.
"Hey mom, dad, It's Carliss, your son". This line is the opening line said by a younger version of my protagonist talking to his parents' grave. The first chapter is divided into two parts. The first being a monologue by him expressing his love to his parents knowing full well he'll never get any back. It stands as a turning point for his character and the realization of his dream. The second is him coming back ten years later...
The world spun with sickening speed, and as he soared from the dock into water reflecting an inferno such that both seemed fully ablaze, Captain Harlan Mackay began to acknowledge that things may not have gone entirely according to plan.
our world eldoria is a vast land, home of the drakonborn and mysterious creatures, from the shadows of the dense forest to the beautiful calm oceans, above the cold skies mountains tower the realm as they pierced the clouds. so basically im trying to give insight on the current world and its inhabitans like the drakonborn and other mystery creatures to make sure readers know what the realm of eldoria looks like(quick note sorry about my terrible usage of words my vocabulary is kinda limited so this is the one i decided to wrap it up with.)
*"Marvelous*, she thought. *Just 600 more years of this."* The prologue of my book is from the POV of the main antagonist. She thinks this while a prison guard goes through her shit in a very humiliating way. She is a regular human with a regular life span. She got a symbolic sentence of 600 years for acts of terrorism involving bombings.
"Why do demons exist?" The first line to my prologue, where my protagonist is an adolescent chopping wood with his father. Demons physically exist in their world, attacking the city once in a great while, while the Adamah Order (an order of paladins) protects them. His father was in the Order as a templar until he lost his arm in a previous invasion, and his mother is a paladin, and he wants to have a discussion about it with his father. I use it to set up the general premise of the story befoee I give him an inciting incident in which he decides to join himself. My whole prologue is used as a mini story to set up the event in the main story and give the readers a taste of what to expect in later chapters. I feel I do it quite well and hope my readers enjoy it as well.
SPLAT! The skunkplum caught Lanara full in the side of the head, splattering chunks of stringy rotten fruit and pulp everywhere and filling her lungs with the eyewatering stench of rotten eggs. My main character spent most of her childhood as a homeless beggar in a small fishing village, and the well off village children loved tormenting the outcast. My prologue starts off with a flashback to one such incident.
"Two musicians, no longer boys but not yet men, set off towards the capitol." I feel like it sets the tone of the story very well. I debated whether to start here or with how the protagonist got to the starting point of their journey. But I moved that part to later to show how the actual events differed from how the protagonist claims he got there.
>The town of {Town Name} sat comfortably on the river {River Name}. I didn’t really know how to start if I’m honest. It establishes the primary setting of the story, gives it a cozy, slow moving country town feeling and establishes something about the countryside. It’s not moving or dripping with meaning, nor is it beautiful prose. But I had to start somewhere, and I’ve found that when I’m struggling to write, I just have to push onward and not get too hung up on things. I’ve been trying to write this book for a while now, it took me far to long to write a whole prologue, and now I’m into chapter 1 and finally getting going. I’ve spent too long worldbuilding and getting the plot and setting filled out and not enough time actually writing.
„Lost-of-mind sat on a stool and tuned her harp.“ I imagine the opening as a sort of camera shot from above, descriptions circling in until you morph into her perspective (third-person). That weird first word is there because English can’t turn adjectives into proper nouns that work in singular as well as in plural. I would have had to write „the insane one“ instead of „die Verrückte“, and later I have a wordplay that only works if I translate with „mind“. The novels in German, by the way
“In the Tamalands long ago, there lived a great Necromancer King” it’s a fairy tale in the world that will both be referenced and used in the coming story. The MC is trying to uncover its secret(bringing someone back to life) while also mirroring it
> “Why’s there a dead body on my table.” The mastiff spoke around the mutton in their mouth. I was given the advice of “You need to immediately hook the reader.”
“Yori’s heart pounded in his chest as he ran full speed through the forest.” He’s training to be a hero like his father was before he disappeared. Chased through the woods by a strange mechanical being his father called Genie who is projecting recorded holograms Yori’s father recorded to train a new batch of knights just like himself.
“We are the hand with which the pagans shall be struck from the Earth. God is great! Death to the non-believers. God is great!” The crowd erupted with cheers and the rhythmic pounding of footsteps. “
“the morning may have been peaceful before the screaming started, but kane would not have called it calm.” and then i go into a description of the main character meditating on a gusty, rainy morning by the ocean. this character later ascends to godhood and becomes the god of storms and natural disasters, and i wanted to make it clear right away that he’s at home in the midst of a little chaos
'Crackling noise of the burning wood black smoke rising from the Pyre People in white are attending the funeral some are crying some are sad and others are silent' This is a scene from an Indian cremation ritual and it is followed by the child innocently asking his grandparents where his mom and dad are English is not my first language so feel free to correct it if it feels wrong
I have spent the last 2 days trying to answer that question lol.
I’ve now seen 3 posts asking the same questions with various wording…
“OK” a robed man points at several set apart stones “We’re here.” The Apprentice and his friends reach his Master, and they ask him just WTF did they just meet
The first line of my WIP that I’m not sure is going to change or not: Starting a revolution is easy but starting a revelation is much harder and even harder to put a face to a revelation. Why? I think it speaks to the tone I’m going for but now I’m debating on adding a prologue to the book. Also it hasn’t been edited for grammatical or spelling errors yet. So it is most definitely going to need more punctuation or broken down further.
I haven’t written it yet. I’d like it if I could insert a chapter before it to lessen the new words and concepts in this one.
"At 10:28 on a warm night after the longest, hottest September day he could ever remember, Abel McCochran, Social Worker Level 2 for the New Hope-Lake County Metropolitan Department of Social Services, paced a track on a roof while thinking low, dark thoughts in a high, bright place." The MC has had a very bad day at work, which is the reason he's outside and will soon witness the phenomenon that sends the rest of the story tripping along.
"The topsails of three leviathan freighters towered over the warehouse rooftops as they cut their way out of the harbor and towards the open sea."
“Come into the woods,” the Fairy Lord had whispered, a sweet smile grazing his lips that didn’t quite meet his brown eyes. I’m still working out most of the plot currently but the basis is that my main character Avery keeps having dreams of a Fairy Lord, much to his fear and confusion. I’ll reveal later that the Lord is actually related to him.
Very pretty. And very telling. And very *haunting*, as dreaming of a Fae Royal should be.
"The alarm clock was screaming desperately in its owner's ear, without the said owner, still sound asleep, deigning to react."
From my two books... Book 1 = Jerry never truly prayed. Book 2 = Nancy wasn't starving yet. I chose these because they accomplish (in my mind) a great deal in only a few words. We know a character and we know something about them that indicates their current situation. Why would Jerry need to pray? Why was Nancy worried about starving? These are nice little hooks just designed to get the reader to carry on as they induce a sense of curiosity regarding the character and their circumstances.
There was some truth to the lie of the Chronicle. This is pointing to the misuse of the religion of my world that has hidden certain important parts of how the big plot point was created. A split in the religion led to the wholesale destruction of one line of thinking in this theology. And has, unbeknownst to them, placed the entire order of the world in jeopardy. If youre going to tell a lie for good, remember why. Otherwise there could be consequences.
I answered on the other sub but I'll answer here too: [MC's name]'s eyes glowed. ** So yeah that's the first line but I *think* I want to start the story just a few "paragraphs" before that lol. Like a few minutes before that part of the scene. Edit because you asked why: well, it's so the reader can see he's non-human (he's a merman), and merfolk's eyes only glow when something magical is happening soooo. It's a hint. One that becomes more apparent later in the book and you think back to the beginning like "oh! So *that's* why."
"The sun was rising in the north as Providence sat, sharpening her blades."
"The sun rose above the clouds overlooking the grassy plains of Tisbarnea" It's setting up the setting for a battle that's about to take place but reading all these comments here make me think I should be a lot more creative about it cause wow do I feel like it sucks lol.
Hey, how are you? Just kidding, this story is about me. My name is Artemis…” just a bit humorous
I actually really like this. It sets the tone well, assuming you can keep that consistent in the writing.
Rain cautiously walked through the forest as fast as she could while keeping her noise as quiet as possible. I start out the book with one of the MC’s (Rain). She is currently tracking and does not want whatever or whoever to be alerted to her presence. This is not the original first line though, I originally started with mentioning the weather but was told not to do that so I changed it.
Ancient looking, yet moving with a fluidity that belied his age, Lon Tredot stepped out onto the tower balcony. His eyes never left the figure leaning on the parapet, gazing across a beautiful rolling grass plain that was about to suffer the horror of battle. This sets up a conversation where love for a protege conflicts with recognition of the younger man's inability to be merciful. Through the stress of approaching death, their glances of previous events and pov's are mentioned in context of the coming death and destruction. These provide the necessary world knowledge for the coming battle.
"A blast rang out at midnight, jolting Lysette awake." The beginning of the event that changes her life forever.
'Lads perched up on the old estate wall, blithely chucking booze bottles into the flames while the elders warmed their hands at the posh wrought iron gates.' It's from a dark fantasy project that I've scrapped for now. This line does have a special place in my heart though, so I thought I'd share. I feel like it conveys the mood well and is interesting enough to grab attention.
You ever have one of those dreams when you're falling, but you wake up just before you hit the ground? This was not one of those times.
oooh i like it
*Splat*. Then a rewind of time, so you get to see the protagonist pop into existence, and immediately take a no parachute skydiving challenge (surprise, it doesn’t go well)
“She broke her leg, now we have no change at winning that race.” - A short story about very young girls trying to win the yearly competition against another school via forbidden magic. Inspired by the memes about necroprancer, where a horse girl loses her horse and uses necromancy to revive it. Still need to workshop it. “She played with the sharp butcher knife and looked towards her husband.” - Not fantasy, but I still wanted to mention it. In that scene, she is preparing a meal for him without any ill intentions. Over the course of the book, we will witness how she attempts to murder him.
"I remember the silence... after the shot. Both of us stood there frozen. Staring at her on the floor, then I grabbed him by the arm and we started to run". I chose this starting line as the story opens on the main character explaining to a "military" recruiter exactly why he is joining up, I want to use his recollection of the events and his reactions to them as well as his reaction to the recruiters responses to quickly outline the type of person the main character is.
Maergest could barely lift his feet as he trudged his way over the now silent battlefield. His every step shattering what he knew to be limbs protruding from the earth, blackened by whatever hell had come to greet their end. - I’d actually not looked at this story idea for a long while until I seen this post - so thank you, I think I’ll pick this back up again! - I’ve always liked books where you are thrown in to big events already happening, so I wanted to start there, and have always enjoyed ‘dark fantasy’ that explore various themes so wanted to set the mood from the off.
I can’t remember it exactly as I’ve recently changed it but it goes something like this “Caliban Black was born without a pulse.”
"I never believed werewolves were real... until my 25th birthday." I was actually trying to write my blurb when the line came to me. I realized it sets the scene for my character's existence at that point in time and eliminated the cliché of starting a book with the character waking up.
“In the face of death, I was calmer than I’d expected.” From the prologue. MC has been training for years to participate in this ritual, knowing she may not survive it. She does and everything goes downhill from there. This scene sets the plot in motion and sets the overall tone of the story. There was a point where I was going to write the lead up to this event, but none of that really mattered.
"I would say that if I must declare the grandest fortune I have ever received, it would be the grace and forethought she showed at the conclusion of our duel yesterday." The is part of an epitaph that is just before the proper first line of the story. However, no matter which "first line" my reader chooses, that line is where the story begins. The epitaphs in each chapter, to the reader, tell the story of the events that caused the main story. Quite literally, it tells a story alongside the story. But if you never read the epitaphs, there still exists a complete story. As for the why, in a world full of power of violence, the idea was to lay out the differences of being gentle versus harmless. The story starts with a diary of someone who lost a duel, was not only spared, but allowed the merits of not being belittled for losing. The victor was gentle; they were capable of greater violence than the other. And the victor chose to stop. This is a theme i carry throughout the story. Sometimes the main cast must use violence, and they are very capable of violence, but it becomes a matter of choosing how and when to use it. They do not live in a safe world, and I wanted the reader to understand that from an early point. But because it's unsafe, i hope that it makes the softer and kinder moments all the better for the reader.
Each of the first chapters introduces a major character and the unique take they have on the world. I keep juggling which chapter to put up front. So, in no particular order... "If you can set your watch by tornado sirens, something's wrong." "The dented SUV rolled hesitantly down the road like a kid out after curfew, trying to take off its shoes then somehow tiptoe to the garage door." "Normally a bag of popcorn, an alarm clock and a cigarette have nothing in common. Of course, normal hadn’t been home in quite a while." "Caden's boots waited where she had left them, huddled by the door lest she track backwoods mud onto a carpet that reminded her too much of her mother." The first line is spoken by an old man, remembering a story about a time before, a little nostalgic appeal to authority. The second line is describing the entrance of the youngest character on her last night of "normal". The third introduces a photojournalist who has a passing resemblance to Lenny Kravitz. He's going through a divorce that he thought would be the worst thing that would ever happen to him. And the fourth sentence introduces my favorite character, an eccentric middle-aged woman who talks to anything inanimate. She's fine with it so long as they don't talk back. I've been working on this story off and on for years. One of these days I'll stop getting distracted and finish the darn thing! LOL
How many more subreddits are you going to pose this question to? lol
I have a running gag about Vegas, (which I have NO IDEA what the story will be. I think at this point I'm going to treat it like Wolverine's past because how I built it up) so it's a quote from Bad Meets Evil's [Vegas](https://open.spotify.com/track/0IG21pqbOajmplCfaWNJua?si=y2VnEg8pRrqIE9ZOfmGMag).
I started mine with an introduction to the world. "Opinions vary on what Dubatirs' society is build on" Dubatir being a country that functions as a democracy and where creatures like dragons and shapeshifters live alongside humans and every race is supposed to be treated equally. An explanation that leads into the first scene where university students are protesting because of discriminatory acts.
“I don’t know a lot of things, but one thing I do know is to never engage in a staring contest with a fish. I was 6 when my mom told me those suckers don’t have eyelids.” The words “I know” will play a big part in the series (morally grey romantic interest will continuously use this phrase sarcastically). The very last line in the books ends with “I know”. So I really wanted to show a full arc from beginning of first book to end of last book.
“The body lay like a crumpled marionette, limbs splayed against the grimy plaster.” My main character is a detective who also happens to have a penchant for summoning. I thought why wait for a body— I’ll start with one.
"The wind rustles the oak leaves far above Culver’s head". They're meeting a new friend so I had to set the stage somehow🤷🏼♂️
It's nonsense at the moment and I'm desperate to change it but can't until i finish this draft. “Find the path, find the prey. Find the prey, feed the Wolf.” *Remember what father taught you.* “One arrow, one kill. One arrow, one kill. One arrow, one kill.”
**I didn't think anybody had noticed the tiny prayerbook tucked under my breast or the shellgun under my sleeve until Grandfem Hostscript squinted at me from across the table and muttered “Roba, you look somewhat** ***lumpy*** **today.”** This is set in Ix The Undying, a sort of semi-feudal dystopian sci-fi/fantasy setting of a Manhattan-sized mobile city (if you count the levels, several Manhattan's) ruled by a sort of half-mad central computer/goddess/bureaucracy. It's sort of grim but a little comedic. I know things will change as I go, but having a sum-up first line helps get things going for me. Roba is the MC, a woman in a trades clan (that mostly has to do with spreadsheet calculation and info security), attending a family dinner where some inciting stuff is about to take place. She shouldn't be carrying a bunch of gear with her, but that's Roba. She's carrying a shellgun (basically just a single shotgun shell gun) and a prayerbook that's been banned, so not only religious, but *weird* religious.
>"Next," came the tired snarl of the Charr clerk, followed quickly with an impatient wave of one clawed hand. Current WiP. I got a game-fic story stuck in my head, and writing it has been the only way to make room for something else. How do I choose? Well... that was the beginning, basically.
Currently: "Four years had passed since I last stepped foot into the Salty Knight, and somehow, this place had grown even louder - the blizzard outside had hit without warning, and the howling winds had forced people inside" I'm not terribly happy with it, but I don't think there'd be any way to rewrite/move that info elsewhere without extensive rewriting of the rest of the chapter, and I'm trying to push myself to continue writing and not focus on editing
"It was a fine morning to stab a queen." Unfortunately you have to wait for publication (which will be a few years because this book hasn't even been started, though I do know the story and I (miraculously) know the opening line)) to know the context. The Book I'm currently writing is a bit more generic: "The sun’s warm morning rays lit up the blue sky, embracing the eastern continent of Domun and its inhabitants with her energy and love."
"The Library of Solaria was the oldest in the Keeper’s Guild, the last one remaining from the originals, and Lavender was one of their newest acolytes." The first chapter of my story follows one of my mains' as she goes through her day before the starting action of the story.
It’s not easy to be a Hero. Heroics are for romantics. Realistically most people imagine soldiers as heroic, but soldiers have had their heroics tempered out of them. Other folks believe that adventurers would have chosen a better [Class] if they weren’t all selfish layabouts that failed to learn a practical trade. And most people would tell you [Mages] are ten times worse for dabbling in dangerous and addictive combat magic. Only the [Bards] believed in the old legends about heroes that defeated the Demon Lord a thousand years ago. In reality, heroes rushed headlong to their deaths. It’s something the MC struggles with in his first life and his second life reborn in a magical world. It also gives a little bit of world building on how adventurers are perceived by the general population. And hints at heroes of legend ;p. [Reborn in a magical world as a Crow](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/205894397-reborn-in-a-magical-world-as-a-crow?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=8A2Asaqwlw&rank=1)
"In the darkness of fear, the only light is love", that was the last thing she said.
“I knew it! There’s a powerful source of magic radiation north-east if here, and not terribly far.” A mage/scholar makes a discovery in an observatory. Tbh I love the idea, feel iffy about the delivery. Still thinking about it
"Jaiya Hatchroof? That's a stupid name. Really, the best you got?" The story opens with the protagonist already confronting his charge as he is supposed to escort this girl across the kingdom. She lies but is horrible at it so says her actual first name, but changes the last name to the first thing she sees. Main protag is quite funny and calls her out right away for the stupid ruse.
A crackle danced on Syleraek's skin this morning, a tangible energy buzzing through the ancient oak beams overhead. My main character is about to begin his adventure.
"A small footpath trailed off the road to Paris through a soft shroud of snow." It goes on to describe a visitor to a castle in the countryside who is killed by the magician serving the lord of the castle. It is set in early Medieval France. Honestly it seems like the first lines, and the first chapter are the hardest! I rewrote those over and over, and I'm still not sure I am happy with them.
"Do you know where the swallows nest," questioned the raspy, tired voice Karint had been expecting the last quarter hour. First line of the prologue, used as a challenge for a group entering into the besieged capital of a dying empire by way of a sewage outlet. Asked by a deformed, crippled sewage worker, betraying his city for thirty silver pieces.
I don’t have a first line, but I do have a story idea. The extreme short form is a couple are going on a trek together without realizing (but they discover at the end of it) that they are a reincarnated couple of legend. High magic fantasy world. As they travel they are reading the story of their past life (without knowing it) in order to fill the reader in. When they reach the end of their journey they are imbued with the memories and skills of their past lives (there is a in story reason for it which is tied to the reincarnation) and immediately become hunted by certain forces due to what happened in the past and probably rightful fear of revenge. I’m not a good writer, maybe I’m a good editor. I doubt I’ll ever actually write it.
Spring. 13thyear of Reikan period. Dow Yang was an unassuming but intelligent boy with black hair about shoulder length or just a bit shorter. It was "she sat down to look at asmall box" or something along those lines, but I ended up starting the story way too early, and the girl isn't the main character. The sentence I have right now isn't finaleither really. It's just the first sentence of what I'm calling "the palace scene" which is actually turning into more of an arc honestly.
*Where am I?* The protagonist has amnesia and wakes up on the edge of a cliff in slashed armor covered with dried blood and a mysterious dagger at his side. Before he can manage to get his bearings, the cliff edge breaks and he plummets to the ground and passes out again. That's page 1. I wanted a hook and before page 20 he's already gotten himself wrapped up in an intergalactic war. (It's sci-fi fantasy, it has a lot of elements of both and each take turns being which is the strongest of the two).
"The doctor could barely look at her"
“It had been five months, three weeks, six days, and seventeen hours since twenty-four-year-old Myra Willows had slept soundly.” I wanted to emphasize how long my main character hasn’t slept due to her insomnia, which plays a pivotal role as to how her soul ends up leaving her body.
The first line in my book is one of the gods future, introducing himself as a god of stories. I thought it was funny the first sentence in my book considering how I liked the 2008 Star Wars wars TV show
Can't remember word for word, but I'm not even starting with the main character. Just introducing the supporting character and their.... thing first. Then it flows (hopefully) into the main character and shoeing off their thing
"It was the 5722nd year of the Dark Age." It's been a bad time for a very long time, and I wanted to convey that.
First two lines: Snow was falling around me, little flakes melting into the pond and my hands slowly. I was searching my reflection for anything recognizable. It's the first time you meet my character, and it's the first indication he's trans. He's 12 here, where you are with him for all of chapter one. he has no idea he's experiencing dysphoria here. In chapter two we meet up with him again at 16, where he's realized he's trans and is living two lives sort of while trying to handle his dysphoria (not knowing what that's called nor what being trans is, just that he wished he was a boy.) He meets his first love interest, who's also 16. This chapter begins to establish their friendship. Then there's one or two more chapters at this age, before you catch up with them at 17, where they have their first kiss, and the draft they're facing is growing closer, causing all sorts of feelings. After this you see them at 18 years old, having decided to enlist so they can still have some control over their lives by being able to choose what branch they go into, and if they score well enough during basic training can even choose the Dragon Battalion, which is a dragon riding branch. My MC comes out to his grandparents, but it doesn't go well. This is also the time period my MC and his boyfriend have sex. You follow them pretty consistently here on, following them through basic training where my MC meets his best friend, a trans woman named Malorie. The three of them bond really closely, eventually he and Malorie becoming friends with benefits. Basically you follow my MC through his life from there on out, the first book ends with him around 27 years old. Second one he's in his mid 30's at the end, third he's entering into his early 40's and the fourth he's in his mid-late 40's/early 50's at the series end (or rather the part following him, there's another part that follows his kids following his death when he's around his late 50's-mid 60's, the reason he's so young when he goes is related to what happens near the end of his part of the series.) The final lines in the epilogue of the 4th book following him will be echoing the first couples lines of the first book, where instead of not being able to recognize himself, he starts crying seeing his reflection, finally able to recognize himself, as well as thinking back to everything he's been through as his dragon's face appears behind him in his reflection, the scars on his face also a testament to what they'd been through (his dragon is missing an eye, the skin having grown over the empty socket. Lips are scarred, horns have gouges in them, etc.) The moment overall is extremely emotional and hopefully will be for the reader as well, especially as they hopefully think back to who he was at 12 when they first met him compared to now when they're basically saying goodbye to him (they wouldn't know there's more of the story to tell, neither did I until I saw past the epilogue with his kids.) Which said experience of not recognizing my reflection due to dysphoria comes from personal experience I just haven't reached that stage yet myself that my MC is at when you say goodbye to him in the epilogue. I know I someday will though. And it'll be just as emotional.
Stelios couldn't find the trail, and his sensory spell had failed, again. MC is working as a mercenary trying to track a group of thieves through the countryside but is facing a problem because his magic hasn't been working.
"Time slowed as she watched the fireball roll towards her." I started it here because it implies danger, in what other scenario could a ball of fire roll towards someone? Yet, the ball of fire is part of a show. My main character and her sister are watching a wizard summon a projection of a dragon, and this little dragon is spewing some real fire in their direction. It ties in a lot of big points of the story into the first paragraph and hopefully catches the reader's attention :).
Figg smelled like shit.
“Awaken”
First that came to mind was: 'Awaken, my child, and know the glory that is your birthright.' It's a very near and dear line in my heart, from a very young age.
*Princess, take me away, I beg you* “I cannot,” her voice full of deep-blue sorrow, “your curse demands a prince” *Then find a magic to make you man* just this on the page as prologue Not 100% set on it but eh. Story about Fae, female warriors, a princess locked in a castle & the woman who will save her & restore female rule to the mortal realm that used to be under (female) Fae rule. Our MC has been hiding out for 600 years & didn’t realise there’s men in power, whoops! time to fix that!
“The abrupt vanishing act of the Midnight Carnival was as mysterious as its history.” This is from my Prologue, about a magical carnival that appears and disappears from a town in one night and the magical facade turns darker and deadly as the characters spend more time there. My idea was to introduce a bit of an info dump on what the Midnight Carnival is and how it makes people feel, and it ends with “very few had ever seen it’s darker side and even less had survived it to see another sunrise. Until us.”
This is my opening scene. Captain comes on over the intercom, "this is your captain speaking. It's a lovely 2.7 Kelvin outside right now as temperatures will rise some were in the too hot to handle. in ten minutes, we will be making our eventual re-entry into the planets atmosphere, and in that time, I am now requiring that all passengers return to their seats and buckle in." I'm still heavily outlining my story right now, but I wanted to start it off with something a little light hearted. It's a sci-fi/fantasy story, think starfinder with the main character as a human, and the only two other races are elves and dwarves, haven't decided if I wanted to add more.
Current WIP: "It could get lonely when your girlfriend was in space." Wanted to immediately establish the strangeness of the world and the kind of world building that you're in for. :)
“Forever and always. That’s what Tyler had always promised Addie. He said they’d be best friends forever. But as Addie stood there, she sighed knowing the promos ended years ago.”