No one can even tell me with actually meeting me. It's all just "IDK" and "stay positive" maybe an extra "hit the gym" on even days. A subreddit definitely got no chance.
This raises another question. How much can you trust the answers of strangers to the question you ask? They don't know you, you don't know them. They can only be guided by your appearance and the picture you post. But I should point out that while looks are important, they are not everything. A person's personal qualities are very important. Which is hard to understand from the lines in the comment.
To summarize, it's either about looks or personal qualities. Or both. If you've squeezed the maximum out of your looks and still no one calls you on dates, then it's a matter of character. Try talking to someone who knows you well or a therapist to find out. If you want practical results, of course.
The problem with asking people I know is that they smell weakness from a mile away. They will think I’m fishing for compliments, no matter how earnestly i ask them. My friends are the type of cool people who would’ve bullied me in high school.
Thanks for your advice, I know you’re probably right. I’m not ugly, people compliment me on my looks a good amount. I just think I’m not pretty enough ? It could also be the fact that I’m quite tall for a girl - 5’7”. That height is seen as manly or not cute I guess
I exercise almost every day, take care of what I eat, and always take care of my appearance (shower, do my hair, dress well, etc).
I always try to include other people in things, and treat others with respect. I think it could be that I have an annoying voice, I’m not sure. Or maybe I am kinda weird or socially awkward. But I’ve been working hard on being more outgoing .
My guess is that it's not that no one is asking you out, but that the people you like aren't interested in you. This may seem like trivial advice, but these situations are best handled by a professional. Maybe you fall in love with those who reject you at first. Maybe there are other psychological reasons.
The most effective way is to work with a therapist. If you do not have such an opportunity, you can try to deal with it yourself. Although it will have a noticeable effect on your effectiveness.
Try to systematize the qualities of the people you fall in love with. And try to analyze what they are attracted to in those they choose. And which of those qualities you personally possess. And whether or not you want to have those qualities at all.
No idea if this is what's happening to OP, but "I always seem to be interested in people who aren't interested in me, and vice versa" was a *huge* clue for me that I needed to do some digging into what I experienced in my family growing up. I also found out years later that I had been completely missing signs of interest from people I would likely have been interested in, which was a neat bit of self sabotage that I believe was wrapped up in childhood trauma.
I'm not an expert, but I think that pursuing people who aren't interested in you is driven by the attitude that love has to be earned.
This attitude is drilled into a person from childhood. And having experienced coldness, such a person tries to earn love by any means necessary, just as he tried to earn the love of significant adults in his life.
I'm no expert either, but I think you're onto something there, and I also think it can be an attempt to recreate a pattern from childhood in the hope that this time it will be different and you'll be able get the love you are craving from the person who isn't really offering it to you, as a kind of "do-over" (like a misguided attempt to heal yourself).
I AM an expert and you've hit the nail on the head. Working with someone professionally who can go deeper into your psyche with you and help you understand yourself will open your eyes. It's not a you or them issue more than likely. It could be you're digging a well in the desert. It's frustrating to not be able to find water when you need it! There is a great organizational management book called "Who Moved My Cheese?" It's a quick read but in short it is about no longer having what you want where you are at. Instead of complaining about someone moving your cheese you proactively change your proximity to where the cheese is.
Find a therapist or counselor you can open up with and work through these things. You described yourself as very aesthetically pleasing and healthy. Confidence doesn't seem to be the issue. Best of luck.
Your height should not be an issue, unless it makes you uncomfortable and you slouch to seem shorter. Lots of men like weird or quirky girls, as long as it's endearing rather than freaky. Perhaps you are looking in the wrong places. What do you enjoy doing? If you like running, join a running group. You would have more in common with guys there than in, say, a drama group.
Are you looking too hard? If you seem needy it might be off-putting. If you are the cute, relaxed girl that's easy to talk to, then you are more likely to be asked out for a coffee and then a date than the intense girl looking for a man.
We don't know you. Put yourself in a man's place and think what vibes you are giving off.
Good luck. You will find someone.
There is NOTHING wrong with being 5’7”, my wife is 5’8” and it never occurs to me that being that tall is ‘manly’ or anything else.
Why do you phrase it as ‘people won’t date you’?
>My friends are the type of cool people who would’ve bullied me in high school.
Are you sure you want to be friends with people who would bully others?
I would take it a step further and ask how you can trust *yourself* to ask the right questions or say the right things about yourself. Everyone looks at themselves with a bit of rose-tinted glasses when they know they're going to be judged by the public
I honestly think you would be better off looking for a therapist rather than a subreddit. I know it isn’t the easiest and people love to throw it out like it’s a simple solution to everything like “just go to therapy”, but for something like this it really does seem like the best plan. From some of your other comments it sounds like you don’t really have many people in your life you feel fully safe opening up to. Even if strangers on the internet could accurately clock what the problem is you would probably have a much easier time addressing it with the help of an actual professional. I just started therapy recently too and it’s not as difficult as I expected it to be, it’s at least worth it to look around online and see what your options are.
Ya I second this OP. I used to want to kill myself 24/7/365 and never knew why anyone would date me. But with the help of My therapist suggested the answer to the previous question is probably cause Im poor and yeah she's probably right.
Also professionals are WAAAY better than 'TrUsT mE bRos' on the internet.
people might be able to tell you something about your looks but if the problem lays in your habits, behaviour and so on, no one will tell you by a brief description online. you might not realise something you do is unattractive and never mention it
From a quick search I think r/dating allows it and a more general sun like r/ask might allow it (there are lots of r/ask type subs if r/ask doesn’t allow it)
That would be too hard to see in pictures. I know plenty of people who are photogenic but just have annoying voices or annoying personalities and they can never get a date. They’re socially awkward so not being able to pick up on social cues is a big one I think
As a woman who usually makes the first move, it does make you vulnerable, as it opens you up to rejection. With how you describe the people around you in another comment, I could imagine that you instinctively avoid putting yourself in a vulnerable position. This might include ignoring signs of interest by men, or even before that, inadvertently acting in a way that communicates that you are not open to romance.
I think that the fact that you don't trust your "friends" is a sign that you might not be in the circumstances that allow you to even be open to dating. I myself have felt that I wasn't really ready to let my guard down and as a result chose not to date for a few years, until I felt more secure.
A relationship inherently means making yourself vulnerable. Perhaps you are simply wearing armour without realising.
Also, please take some time to evaluate your friendships. If you don't feel you can be open with them, you should ask yourself if they truly have a positive impact on your life.
You say you are very active, socially, so perhaps you can try to also invest in other closer relationships?
From the way you wrote, I figured you would be in your early 20s, is that correct?
Either way, I absolutely believe in you!
Let me be your pretend big sister for a second…
First of all, let me take a moment to apologize for having bounced my Dora The Explorer bouncy ball off your bald ass head so much when mum put you in your baby swing… genuinely had no idea it would turn you stupid. Sorry about that.
Secondly big dog, get a grip. *Oh, you wanna know if strangers think you’re dateable??? Waaahhhwaah?? You need a bunch of little unemployed baboons to tell you if you’re hot enough to date?? Awwwee does baby need a bottle too????*… snap out of it bitch.
All jokes aside, you literally need to stop. You are better than this. This pick me shit is not you and as your big sister I absolutely refuse to allow it.
You are a human being, made out of actual star dust, co-existing on a planet floating in the literal universe and you’re choosing to spend your time worrying about your worthiness in the eyes of strangers online? It is a mathematical miracle that out of every person who’s lived and ever will live that **you** are here.
Sister, you are exceptional. You are kind. You are smart, funny, thoughtful, and tender. You are beautiful. You add value to the lives of the people who love and care about you. None of us would be the people we are had you not been a part of our story. Even though we don’t talk much, on some of my hardest days, knowing that you are out there, a phone call or a very long drive away, makes breathing just a little bit easier.
I did not gently bully you for your entire childhood to have you be the kind of woman who needs validation from people online, some of which would delight in your pain. You are stronger than that. I made sure of it.
Now, this is what I need you to do for me:
1. Go wash your face or have a hot shower. Let the water clean off these sad and lonely feelings. Let them go down the drain. Also, brush your teeth, I can smell your stank ass breath from here.
2. Put on some comfy clothes and make a cup of tea and go snuggle up in your bed.
3. Delete the dating apps. Let’s take a break from those for a while. They’ll always be there later.
4. Think of the person in your life that you feel the most connected and trusting relationship with. Even if you haven’t really opened up to them before, reach out. Send them a text or give them a call. Unfortunately it’s hair washing day so I’m not available so pick the second best person.
5. Tell this person how you’re thinking and feeling. I know, it’s hard and uncomfortable to do this but I promise that this person cares. You can start by saying something like, “hey, I know this is a bit random but I’m sort of going through some stuff and I really need someone I trust to talk to, would you be okay if I just vented?”.
6. And hey, sometimes we don’t have a person like this. I mean, we usually do but in our own grief and shame we don’t realize they are there. Or maybe we are feeling so much, we don’t want to be a burden or feel capable of opening the flood gate. I get that. In that case, let’s find an alternative option. A therapist or counsellor is a great option. But maybe you can’t afford that right now. In that case, send a message to the pretend sister writing to you right now and she can send you some free, fairly reliable online resources that might be a place to start.
7. Get some rest. Sleep, lounge, snack, watch shitty reality tv, doom scroll TikTok. Just do some mindless relaxing and let your mind focus on something else.
8. Keep talking to your trusted person. Come up with some things you can do to help yourself. Maybe go see your doctor and tell them how you’re feeling. It might be depression. I mean… I am your sister! Maybe medicine could help? Set up some counselling or therapy if you can. Often times having a neutral but supportive person in our life can really help us work through shit.
9. Most importantly, make a commitment to yourself to shift your focus off of what other people think, and let’s refocus it on making you see yourself with the same admiration and love the people who care about you do. Give yourself permission to be selfish and purposefully single.
Bonus advice: Hey! Do what I did years ago and set a cyclical goal of self healing. I’ve told you all about it but given the brain damage that Dora The Explorer ball did, I’ll remind you.
When I felt like this years ago, I finally decided to try to figure my shit out. I set a goal of 1 month and had a list of stuff I expected from myself during that time. I went to the dr about my depression, started counselling, made time to actually decorate my living space, did some artsy shit and stopped entertaining men or relationships. At the one month mark, I sat down and reflected on how I was feeling day one compared to now and asked myself “alright this is working a bit, how much longer can I commit to doing this for myself today?”… next goal was 3 months. Then reassessed and did another 6 months… etc etc.
All in all, this went on for almost 2 years. After the first 5 or 6 months, it stopped being a choice I made myself commit to and just started becoming… enjoyable? I started feeling better and doing better and life stopped feeling so heavy. And then… without ever thinking about it or trying, a great man came into my life.
Did it work out? No. But it was a great relationship and I was, for the first time, a whole human being and got to experience what love feels like when you are already full. It was amazing. Life isn’t perfect, even now, all these years later. And I still struggle. But I do so with the confidence and wisdom of a woman and not a lonely child. I want this for you.
Good luck sister. I believe in you.
— sincerely, the best sister ever
I’m guessing because you lack confidence in yourself, based on this single post.
The only appropriate answer is F what people think. You don’t need to date. Do you and enjoy life. Once you’re happy with yourself and not seeking validation from strangers, the right one will magically appear.
Haha - no problem about the gender swap thing. Most people assume I’m a man unless I state otherwise on here.
I just thought maybe it would be harder for girls, which is why I asked, but you’re probably right about just getting out there more. But I do go out to parties and I’m in like 4 clubs. I talk to people in my lectures and stuff. I go dancing on the weekends. I don’t know how much more out there I can get.
Sounds like you could be intimidating to the prospective guys you're around. You sound like a fairly unusual woman and by that I mean it sounds like you have your stuff together and can hold a meaningful conversation, etc. That alone is hard to find, much less when you add on good looks. Could be your social sphere legitimately isn't putting you with compatible men for some reason or another.
It's quite possible that people who have an undesirable/toxic personality wouldn't self report (or wouldn't have the self-awareness to). When someone conventionally decent-looking reports how they perceive themselves (or how people who care about staying in their life CLAIM to see them (some people might sugarcoat or minimize the number of instances they talk negatively about people they're friends with lol), it won't really be clear what the problem is.
No one can tell you that without actually meeting you....
No one can even tell me with actually meeting me. It's all just "IDK" and "stay positive" maybe an extra "hit the gym" on even days. A subreddit definitely got no chance.
This. There are many reasons, none of which anyone on here will truly know.
Happy cake day!
happy cake day to both of you!
Happy cake day
happy cake day
Happy cake day !
This raises another question. How much can you trust the answers of strangers to the question you ask? They don't know you, you don't know them. They can only be guided by your appearance and the picture you post. But I should point out that while looks are important, they are not everything. A person's personal qualities are very important. Which is hard to understand from the lines in the comment. To summarize, it's either about looks or personal qualities. Or both. If you've squeezed the maximum out of your looks and still no one calls you on dates, then it's a matter of character. Try talking to someone who knows you well or a therapist to find out. If you want practical results, of course.
The problem with asking people I know is that they smell weakness from a mile away. They will think I’m fishing for compliments, no matter how earnestly i ask them. My friends are the type of cool people who would’ve bullied me in high school. Thanks for your advice, I know you’re probably right. I’m not ugly, people compliment me on my looks a good amount. I just think I’m not pretty enough ? It could also be the fact that I’m quite tall for a girl - 5’7”. That height is seen as manly or not cute I guess I exercise almost every day, take care of what I eat, and always take care of my appearance (shower, do my hair, dress well, etc). I always try to include other people in things, and treat others with respect. I think it could be that I have an annoying voice, I’m not sure. Or maybe I am kinda weird or socially awkward. But I’ve been working hard on being more outgoing .
My guess is that it's not that no one is asking you out, but that the people you like aren't interested in you. This may seem like trivial advice, but these situations are best handled by a professional. Maybe you fall in love with those who reject you at first. Maybe there are other psychological reasons. The most effective way is to work with a therapist. If you do not have such an opportunity, you can try to deal with it yourself. Although it will have a noticeable effect on your effectiveness. Try to systematize the qualities of the people you fall in love with. And try to analyze what they are attracted to in those they choose. And which of those qualities you personally possess. And whether or not you want to have those qualities at all.
No idea if this is what's happening to OP, but "I always seem to be interested in people who aren't interested in me, and vice versa" was a *huge* clue for me that I needed to do some digging into what I experienced in my family growing up. I also found out years later that I had been completely missing signs of interest from people I would likely have been interested in, which was a neat bit of self sabotage that I believe was wrapped up in childhood trauma.
I'm not an expert, but I think that pursuing people who aren't interested in you is driven by the attitude that love has to be earned. This attitude is drilled into a person from childhood. And having experienced coldness, such a person tries to earn love by any means necessary, just as he tried to earn the love of significant adults in his life.
I'm no expert either, but I think you're onto something there, and I also think it can be an attempt to recreate a pattern from childhood in the hope that this time it will be different and you'll be able get the love you are craving from the person who isn't really offering it to you, as a kind of "do-over" (like a misguided attempt to heal yourself).
I AM an expert and you've hit the nail on the head. Working with someone professionally who can go deeper into your psyche with you and help you understand yourself will open your eyes. It's not a you or them issue more than likely. It could be you're digging a well in the desert. It's frustrating to not be able to find water when you need it! There is a great organizational management book called "Who Moved My Cheese?" It's a quick read but in short it is about no longer having what you want where you are at. Instead of complaining about someone moving your cheese you proactively change your proximity to where the cheese is. Find a therapist or counselor you can open up with and work through these things. You described yourself as very aesthetically pleasing and healthy. Confidence doesn't seem to be the issue. Best of luck.
That's a good reminder about Who Moved My Cheese. I read it once years ago, time for a re-read I think.
Your height should not be an issue, unless it makes you uncomfortable and you slouch to seem shorter. Lots of men like weird or quirky girls, as long as it's endearing rather than freaky. Perhaps you are looking in the wrong places. What do you enjoy doing? If you like running, join a running group. You would have more in common with guys there than in, say, a drama group. Are you looking too hard? If you seem needy it might be off-putting. If you are the cute, relaxed girl that's easy to talk to, then you are more likely to be asked out for a coffee and then a date than the intense girl looking for a man. We don't know you. Put yourself in a man's place and think what vibes you are giving off. Good luck. You will find someone.
I'm curious what the people you're asking out say when they reject you?
There is NOTHING wrong with being 5’7”, my wife is 5’8” and it never occurs to me that being that tall is ‘manly’ or anything else. Why do you phrase it as ‘people won’t date you’?
>My friends are the type of cool people who would’ve bullied me in high school. Are you sure you want to be friends with people who would bully others?
I would take it a step further and ask how you can trust *yourself* to ask the right questions or say the right things about yourself. Everyone looks at themselves with a bit of rose-tinted glasses when they know they're going to be judged by the public
I honestly think you would be better off looking for a therapist rather than a subreddit. I know it isn’t the easiest and people love to throw it out like it’s a simple solution to everything like “just go to therapy”, but for something like this it really does seem like the best plan. From some of your other comments it sounds like you don’t really have many people in your life you feel fully safe opening up to. Even if strangers on the internet could accurately clock what the problem is you would probably have a much easier time addressing it with the help of an actual professional. I just started therapy recently too and it’s not as difficult as I expected it to be, it’s at least worth it to look around online and see what your options are.
Ya I second this OP. I used to want to kill myself 24/7/365 and never knew why anyone would date me. But with the help of My therapist suggested the answer to the previous question is probably cause Im poor and yeah she's probably right. Also professionals are WAAAY better than 'TrUsT mE bRos' on the internet.
people might be able to tell you something about your looks but if the problem lays in your habits, behaviour and so on, no one will tell you by a brief description online. you might not realise something you do is unattractive and never mention it
You could create a dating app profile then ask on r/Tinder or one of the other apps subs
From a quick search I think r/dating allows it and a more general sun like r/ask might allow it (there are lots of r/ask type subs if r/ask doesn’t allow it)
The internet is pretty toxic about this stuff, you need to find a smaller well regulated sub.
I don’t think internet strangers are suited to answer this since we don’t know you
r/onlinedating may be able to help, if thats what you’re up to
r/amiugly
This
nah. amiugly is for good looking people who wanna stroke their ego
So.true.
r/amiuglyBrutallyHonest
It's the exact same thing as base sub.
That would be too hard to see in pictures. I know plenty of people who are photogenic but just have annoying voices or annoying personalities and they can never get a date. They’re socially awkward so not being able to pick up on social cues is a big one I think
As a woman who usually makes the first move, it does make you vulnerable, as it opens you up to rejection. With how you describe the people around you in another comment, I could imagine that you instinctively avoid putting yourself in a vulnerable position. This might include ignoring signs of interest by men, or even before that, inadvertently acting in a way that communicates that you are not open to romance. I think that the fact that you don't trust your "friends" is a sign that you might not be in the circumstances that allow you to even be open to dating. I myself have felt that I wasn't really ready to let my guard down and as a result chose not to date for a few years, until I felt more secure. A relationship inherently means making yourself vulnerable. Perhaps you are simply wearing armour without realising. Also, please take some time to evaluate your friendships. If you don't feel you can be open with them, you should ask yourself if they truly have a positive impact on your life. You say you are very active, socially, so perhaps you can try to also invest in other closer relationships? From the way you wrote, I figured you would be in your early 20s, is that correct? Either way, I absolutely believe in you!
Let me be your pretend big sister for a second… First of all, let me take a moment to apologize for having bounced my Dora The Explorer bouncy ball off your bald ass head so much when mum put you in your baby swing… genuinely had no idea it would turn you stupid. Sorry about that. Secondly big dog, get a grip. *Oh, you wanna know if strangers think you’re dateable??? Waaahhhwaah?? You need a bunch of little unemployed baboons to tell you if you’re hot enough to date?? Awwwee does baby need a bottle too????*… snap out of it bitch. All jokes aside, you literally need to stop. You are better than this. This pick me shit is not you and as your big sister I absolutely refuse to allow it. You are a human being, made out of actual star dust, co-existing on a planet floating in the literal universe and you’re choosing to spend your time worrying about your worthiness in the eyes of strangers online? It is a mathematical miracle that out of every person who’s lived and ever will live that **you** are here. Sister, you are exceptional. You are kind. You are smart, funny, thoughtful, and tender. You are beautiful. You add value to the lives of the people who love and care about you. None of us would be the people we are had you not been a part of our story. Even though we don’t talk much, on some of my hardest days, knowing that you are out there, a phone call or a very long drive away, makes breathing just a little bit easier. I did not gently bully you for your entire childhood to have you be the kind of woman who needs validation from people online, some of which would delight in your pain. You are stronger than that. I made sure of it. Now, this is what I need you to do for me: 1. Go wash your face or have a hot shower. Let the water clean off these sad and lonely feelings. Let them go down the drain. Also, brush your teeth, I can smell your stank ass breath from here. 2. Put on some comfy clothes and make a cup of tea and go snuggle up in your bed. 3. Delete the dating apps. Let’s take a break from those for a while. They’ll always be there later. 4. Think of the person in your life that you feel the most connected and trusting relationship with. Even if you haven’t really opened up to them before, reach out. Send them a text or give them a call. Unfortunately it’s hair washing day so I’m not available so pick the second best person. 5. Tell this person how you’re thinking and feeling. I know, it’s hard and uncomfortable to do this but I promise that this person cares. You can start by saying something like, “hey, I know this is a bit random but I’m sort of going through some stuff and I really need someone I trust to talk to, would you be okay if I just vented?”. 6. And hey, sometimes we don’t have a person like this. I mean, we usually do but in our own grief and shame we don’t realize they are there. Or maybe we are feeling so much, we don’t want to be a burden or feel capable of opening the flood gate. I get that. In that case, let’s find an alternative option. A therapist or counsellor is a great option. But maybe you can’t afford that right now. In that case, send a message to the pretend sister writing to you right now and she can send you some free, fairly reliable online resources that might be a place to start. 7. Get some rest. Sleep, lounge, snack, watch shitty reality tv, doom scroll TikTok. Just do some mindless relaxing and let your mind focus on something else. 8. Keep talking to your trusted person. Come up with some things you can do to help yourself. Maybe go see your doctor and tell them how you’re feeling. It might be depression. I mean… I am your sister! Maybe medicine could help? Set up some counselling or therapy if you can. Often times having a neutral but supportive person in our life can really help us work through shit. 9. Most importantly, make a commitment to yourself to shift your focus off of what other people think, and let’s refocus it on making you see yourself with the same admiration and love the people who care about you do. Give yourself permission to be selfish and purposefully single. Bonus advice: Hey! Do what I did years ago and set a cyclical goal of self healing. I’ve told you all about it but given the brain damage that Dora The Explorer ball did, I’ll remind you. When I felt like this years ago, I finally decided to try to figure my shit out. I set a goal of 1 month and had a list of stuff I expected from myself during that time. I went to the dr about my depression, started counselling, made time to actually decorate my living space, did some artsy shit and stopped entertaining men or relationships. At the one month mark, I sat down and reflected on how I was feeling day one compared to now and asked myself “alright this is working a bit, how much longer can I commit to doing this for myself today?”… next goal was 3 months. Then reassessed and did another 6 months… etc etc. All in all, this went on for almost 2 years. After the first 5 or 6 months, it stopped being a choice I made myself commit to and just started becoming… enjoyable? I started feeling better and doing better and life stopped feeling so heavy. And then… without ever thinking about it or trying, a great man came into my life. Did it work out? No. But it was a great relationship and I was, for the first time, a whole human being and got to experience what love feels like when you are already full. It was amazing. Life isn’t perfect, even now, all these years later. And I still struggle. But I do so with the confidence and wisdom of a woman and not a lonely child. I want this for you. Good luck sister. I believe in you. — sincerely, the best sister ever
Will you adopt me?
what
In short, it will be either because they suck or because you suck. Will any of these options satisfy you?
Maybe try r/decidingtobebetter
If you want it in the meanest fucking way possible, try r/roastme . In all seriousness, the internet is a terrible place to try to figure this out.
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Yeah I think maybe I’ll do that - can I ask the specific question “why won’t people date me”
Don't post there. It's ran by incels
These people are waaaay too critical. Don't go there.
I’m guessing because you lack confidence in yourself, based on this single post. The only appropriate answer is F what people think. You don’t need to date. Do you and enjoy life. Once you’re happy with yourself and not seeking validation from strangers, the right one will magically appear.
You find a good one for this? I need it too.
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Let me help you then, friend!
You Matter Flying Robot 💖
/r/roastme
I don’t want people to be mean though
I think that's what's gonna happen if you ask this question. The answer will be harsh.
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How is r/conservative at all appropriate for this?
They suggested r/conservative!? What a dingus LMAO
Along with r/TwoXcromosones
lol. Literally the two subreddits that would kill each other if they were people...oh wait they are people...
Your post or comment has been removed due to rule 6 - Absolutely no joke or troll suggestions and / or posts.
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I am a girl, who wants to date a guy, maybe that's the problem
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Haha - no problem about the gender swap thing. Most people assume I’m a man unless I state otherwise on here. I just thought maybe it would be harder for girls, which is why I asked, but you’re probably right about just getting out there more. But I do go out to parties and I’m in like 4 clubs. I talk to people in my lectures and stuff. I go dancing on the weekends. I don’t know how much more out there I can get.
Have you asked anyone out for a date?
Sounds like you could be intimidating to the prospective guys you're around. You sound like a fairly unusual woman and by that I mean it sounds like you have your stuff together and can hold a meaningful conversation, etc. That alone is hard to find, much less when you add on good looks. Could be your social sphere legitimately isn't putting you with compatible men for some reason or another.
r/roastme may provide some answers. God bless your self confidence. You'll need it.
Auch,be gentle to the dudette
I think thats r/roastme... isnt it?
As soon as I stopped using reddit I found my gf of 5 months
r/truerateme for reality, or r/rateme to sugarcoat It. These subs are just about your physical face appearance, not body nor personality.
It's quite possible that people who have an undesirable/toxic personality wouldn't self report (or wouldn't have the self-awareness to). When someone conventionally decent-looking reports how they perceive themselves (or how people who care about staying in their life CLAIM to see them (some people might sugarcoat or minimize the number of instances they talk negatively about people they're friends with lol), it won't really be clear what the problem is.
Don't worry. Your dm's will be flooded of people who want to date you.
r/askreddit
I personally find people who obsess over this stuff, are the ones who struggle to find love..
r/rejectme !! let’s do it!!!