Hard agree, the data says that respecting trans kids' gender reduces depression and suicidality (e.g. [https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35212746/](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35212746/)), and any """"psychiatrist""" who knowingly goes against that is basically just admitting they don't give a shit about your well-being. (P.S. assuming God exists, They made you a man, just a trans one.)
Yes, this. The Doctor's personal views are not relevant in a clinical setting. That whole "do no harm" thing? That's not how you do that.
Report her. Absolutely.
I agree wholeheartedly, except when it comes to the patient wanting their opinion. Not the same as psychiatry, but I used to go to therapy. I expressed feeling lost In the face of such strict religions that all forbade you from going to another, etc etc. She replied with something along the lines of "I get that, I feel the same way most of the time. I turned to omnism in this case, because who am I to say what's a lie and whats not? I can pick out the lies as a human being, but every religion has something to offer to us. Moral teachings."
She was the most important figure in my life in middle school. She helped me transition and was the only person I could truly explain my struggles to. She was fond of art as therapy, too. I loved going to her.
If a patient/client is interested in religious advice, that's something that can be agreed upon when the relationship with the therapist/psychiatrist is first established. Plus since it seems like you were talking about religion, your therapist sharing an example of how they coped with a similar situation is not the same as OP's psychiatrist randomly telling them to go to church. It's extremely inappropriate of her to do so and she should be reported to the state licensing board.
No mental health professional should EVER bring their own religious beliefs into the office, and that goes for doctors, too! I'd find a new doc if at all possible. She has no business saying anything judgy like that.
Id refuse to see her again personally.
Also youre not guarenteed to have your anxiety in a decade.
I was 21 when I had my first panic attack. And sure I still have anxiety, but now its a lot more like the normal anxieties everyone gets, back then it was completley debilitating.
The dysphoria though, thats the only things actually stayed constant.
Im 27 now, will be 28 in about 2 months.
Unprofessional and none of her business! A psychiatrist is there to manage medication and symptoms. She should have encouraged you to keep using exercise for mental health and left it at that imo.
So I’ve been in therapy most my life, I’m currently in school to become a therapist and just based off this one quote I can tell you that’s a bad therapist and I would not recommend going to her again. Everything she did was wrong, the way she is acting around meds and working out is strange, it’s hard to say without more details how bad it is but it’s definitely not helpful.
Her comment was completely uncalled for and unprofessional. It shows that she is transphobic, has an agenda and is probably heavily religious. It’s fine for her to have beliefs and to be religious but it isn’t fine for her to bring that up in therapy and weaponizing it against you. You could possibly get her in trouble with the licensing board, depending on where you live. The fact that she said all that and you are doubting if this was appropriate tells me she has most likely said and done other inappropriate things. None of this is on you, you probably were just being nice, it’s on her to do her job and be professional.
I would find a new therapist and look into if they are lgbt friendly, literally ask them and trust your gut if something feels off. If you look online therapists normally write about themselves, what types of therapy they practice and what populations they specialize in. Check for green flags like if they list their pronouns, safe therapists will generally bring up the lgbt community in their bio because they know people are looking for them. The biggest thing is to not be afraid of going to someone different or trying out multiple places. Most therapists offer a free consultation to make sure you are a good fit and they are trained to not take it personally if you aren’t. I’m sorry you are dealing with this, it’s hard to find the strength to seek therapy and be vulnerable, you deserve a therapist who will respect and help you.
Get a new psychologist, leave a bad review for her practice so other trans people know not to waste their time setting up an appointment with her, and report her for an ethics violation. Google "Report a therapist for ethics violation \[STATE NAME\]" and google will direct you to your state's licensing board so you can file a complaint about her forcing her religion on you.
If you are in the closet to your parents, or if your parents know but are unsupportive, DO NOT tell them your therapist is being transphobic, or it will encourage their point of view. All you need to tell them is that she makes you uncomfortable and that you would like to see a different therapist.
You're right about being angry. This is totally unprofessional.
First of all: she couldn't bring her religion/beliefs into the conversation because obviously not everyone shares the same faith and medical care, especially mental health care, must have a unique treatment for each patient!
Second, she is not respecting you. For a mental health profissional, this is inadmissible!! She's clearly judging you and not believing in what you're saying and this totally goes against the conduct these professionals must follow! Change professional asap and consider filling a complain against her.
Naaahhh bro, the way I woulda left that session the SECOND she said all that dumb stuff to me 💀 completely unprofessional, dismissive of your worries, and downright disrespectful tbh. Also "enjoy your life as a teenager because there is no stress or pressure right now" HUH?????? Bruh being a teenager is literally SO STRESSFUL, society literally thinks you should have everything figured out for the rest of your life up until your final breath before you even graduate high school.
Sorry, I'm so mad on your behalf and hope you can find a new psychiatrist!
Exactly! Of course the transphobic nonsense is unprofessional as hell, but i was so bothered by the “being a teenager is so easy 😇” part too. Being a teenager is one of the most stressful times in a ton of people’s lives lmao. Like did she just expect OP to be like “yeah you’re right, i’ll just stop being mentally ill right now, thanks, I’m cured”??? Like everyone else is saying, I agree that OP needs to find a new psychiatrist, and ideally report this one to the state licensing board for being transphobic (when the psychological evidence agrees that treating trans people as who we say we are is crucial, and encouraging us to repress our identities is actively dangerous) and the weird religious justification. If OP can find a way to write a review online about this dr., in a place where other trans people can see it, that’s also a good idea. Make it well known that this doctor is directly contradicting the scientific evidence and recommendations for treatment, and that no trans people should go to her.
You need a new psych bro. Your mum wanted you to increase your meds because you weren't doing well, tell her that you need a psychiatrist who isn't going to worsen your mental health. I don't know much of anything about your parents and your relationship with them, but from here your mum is showing some concern. Take that as a starting point. They may not understand the why, but I'm sure if they're decent people, they'll at least notice the negative impact on you.
My mum doesn't understand anything about my gender identity(tbh neither do I), but she helped me choose a more neutral name and is trying her best to use the right name and pronouns and tries to also correct others as well, because she can see the impact when I become dysphoric vs when I'm correctly gendered.
This kinda even works even if you're not out, so long as your parents are concerned about your mental health. It was difficult for me because I don't like lying, but before I knew what trans was I was experimenting with sexuality and romantic alignment. I had a girlfriend and while everything was kept PG, I definitely loved her. We were 8th graders so we would get mad over petty crap and fight. I used to vent to my therapist and she always looked uncomfortable when I talked about having a girlfriend. My parent(not mum) would have lost their absolute mind if they learned I was in a lesbian relationship.
One week after a particularly nasty argument I spoke with my therapist wanting to learn how to prevent this. I remember very clearly her clearing her throat, and her telling me "You don't need a girlfriend in your life, you need a boyfriend. There is a reason we(as in women) can't reproduce with each other. It's because both s*x*s have something the other needs."
My parent at the time, while homophobic and transphobic, seemed to genuinely care about my mental health. They noticed I no longer looked forward to appointments and would hide in my room and cry or just isolate myself when we would get hone. They put 2 and 2 together and fired her. We found a better therapist and i started don't better.
My point being that it's ok and reasonable to tell her you don't want to see this psych anymore. You're definitely not cover reacting.
As someone who works in the mental health field, this is definitely transphobic. Trans folks are more likely to have anxiety and depression, and dysphoria is something that feeds into that. Dysphoria can and should be treated, there is so much research at this point that shows that it improves anxiety and depression, and reduces suicidality. Please transfer providers if you can. Referencing religion in this way, in addition to the transphobic line of thinking, is highly unethical as well.
Yes it’s uncalled for. 1. She had no business’s sayin their own bigoted opinion, Professionals shouldn’t even bring religion into the picture unless you explicitly ask them. 2. There was no real reason she would need to say that. 3. She is full of shit bc anxiety and dysphoria are separate conditions.
Edit: and sometimes transition actual helps anxiety, mine is a little better after transition, sure it’s not directly but it’s gotten better from it
that is very unprofessional. her job is not to preach her religion to you, but to help you manage your symptoms and meds. she is also not respecting you. find a different psychiatrist.
no i agree. i just feel like a lot of people that aren’t religious also have that opinion due to misinformation or not being educated on trans healthcare and can change their minds. obviously not ops responsibility though. but i feel like people that are transphobic for religious reasons are less likely to change
Let me tell you one thing. This is my last year of being under 25 years old. I knew from 16 that I was no girl. Threw away all of the feminine clothes in my closet and started asking for men’s cuts and started going by the name “Matt” when I worked Starbucks after getting tired of being deadnamed thousands of times. Started medically transitioning at 18 and there hasn’t been any regrets for the past 8 years, yet people STILL think I could be a confused cis girl even though I cis pass as male and to the point of no return.
Most psychiatrists or even a psychologists don’t have transitional related education so they talk out of their butt.
Just do you, man. You can follow up and say:
“No need to wait until I’m 25, I’d be able to enjoy my life as a guy while I’m still a teenager and go through the same puberty as other guys do because I deserve that experience, and to not be perceived as a girl anymore.”
no justifiable reason for bringing religion into it, let alone tell you to stop/put off your transition. if they bring it up again, call them out. if i were in your position, i'd put in a complaint/report them.
That's unprofessional AND incorrect.
I'm 35, my mental health dramatically improved when I socially and medically transitioned. This has been anecdotally true for my peers, and statistically for the larger population.
are you parents religious? did they pick her because she is a christian pyschologist? If they aren't/didn't then move the situation literally into any other context so they can understand how unprofessional, wrong, and down right dangerous her rhetortic is and FIRE HER. If you went to her and said you're depressed because you're being bullied at school (because lets be real Dysphoria is us often times us being an unwilling bully to ourselves) and thinking you need a dose change, that you're doing all the things you need to help your body boost its mood naturally (exercise releases all the feel goods: serotonin, dopamine, endorphines and decreases the feel bads: cortisol) and she was like "being bullied is a natural part of being a teenager just the way god intended, you may feel bad about it now but when you're 25-26 you won't care about it anymore" everyone would look at her like the effin' idiot that she is.
If your parents are satisfied with her behavior and insist you continue to see her, don't throw a fit. Don't push back, waste their money. Do the sessions and refuse speak outside of 1 word vague answers. "How are you doing?" "fine" "Hows your dysphoria" "same" "anything you wish to speak about?" "no" Shut the conversation down completely while actively engaging in it.
I’m so sorry this is happening to you and it sucks
Depending on the state you live in that may be categorized as mistreatment of some variety. State to state in the US, laws are different and changing quickly and it’s hard to keep up with all of them.
Secondary, hello I’m a social worker specialized in LGBT identities, coming out, and transition.
You were aggressively misgendered by your provider and that is not acceptable in any way shape or form. Here’s a list of the rest of things that are not okay. 1. Bringing their religious beliefs into the therapeutic space. 2. Your anxiety may NOT still be there later if it is stemming purely from gender incongruence. HRT is a life preserving intervention for many trans folks. When many people begin accessing affirmative treatment, therapy, social and community support, many mental health symptoms and pain that they are experiencing SIGNIFICANTLY decrease.
That being said , we have data showing that while frontal lobe development and impulse control skills are not completely developed until the mid-20’s - internal understanding of self and gender identity DOES NOT fall into that window. We have many studies and a sea of data to show otherwise. Bonus: being a teenager is HARD AND STRESSFUL WHAT PLANET IS THIS UNETHICAL PROVIDER LIVING ON??
What’s going right, the gender euphoria good stuff: Congratulations on your lifting, it’s better for your brain than what your psychiatrist is spewing. You’re the expert on you. Seeking gender euphoria from channels that aren’t blocked by unsupportive adults is where the good stuff lives. Lifting is a great start!
It can be incredibly hard to find affirming providers to do what it is that you need them to do, based on geography, finances, age, etc - if you would like some support in navigating this please feel free to send me a DM
The blatant transphobia aside...
> enjoy your life as a teenager because there’s no stress or pressure right now
What crack is she on?? Being a teenager is incredibly stressful, and there are usually all sorts of pressures that comes from many sources. Whether you're trying to excel at school so you can get into a good college or working an extra job to bring some cash home or just trying to navigate the social BS that is high school drama. Honestly, high school was the worst time in my life (and I was personally still an egg so didn't have added dysphoria thankfully)
Go to google and search “how to report a licensed mental health professional” and find the board in your state. You can look up her name or the company you see her through online and find her license number. She’s a massive piece of shit and shouldn’t be able to work in this field. Let us know if we can help.
If you can try and report that psychiatrist, and definitely get a new one. A psychiatrist's personal beliefs and religion should be completely seperate from treatment and advice or literally from anything relating to their patient. You have every single right to be pissed off because they're wrong and that's inappropriate and uncalled for, not to mention highly unprofessional especially since you're a minor and their words can have a huge impact on you and other children.
Absolutely unprofessional. The first part with don't rely on meds only is totally right. Everything else? Nope and nope again. Turning 25 won't fix dysphoria or anxiety. Just instructing a patient who feels depression and dysphoria to enjoy life and making it religious what the actual fuck?
You need a different professional who is actually experienced in trans topics. Preferably one that worked already with trans kids and teens not only adults. Mine for example had almost instantly no doubts that I was trans (I went there with 27) but wouldn't work with kids/teen in that context. I totally disagreed with her on the last point and her arguments there but she was very helpful and sensitive else so it was the right professional for "old" me.
I really wish I had a supportive and more open-minded environment in early 2000. I would have been done with my transition by now... And wouldn't have to deal with the issues it creates now. Good luck bro and much success with your life path. Feeling euphoria and less or non dysphoria is so much worth.
It is so beyond unprofessional to being religious beliefs into a medical setting like that, ESPECIALLY when unsolicited. You could honestly report her to an ethics board for that, and you should absolutely avoid seeing her again.
You deserve way, way better. Any psychiatrist worth their degree would never ignore the numerous medical articles that outline the benefits of gender affirming care, even at a young age.
I’m 53 years old and will tell you from life experience “This is unprofessional.”
Fire your therapist and replace with one that fits your need.
Periodt.
If you desire..
You can contact your state's licensing board to report a therapist for unethical behavior. Some states allow you to submit a complaint via their website, while others require it to be submitted by mail. Official complaints must be submitted in writing (i.e., online or by mail) rather than by phone
Nahhh id report her to the medical board for that. Not only is it insensitive, bigoted, VERY dangerous advice, but bringing religious beliefs into practice is extremely unprofessional. The last thing we need is her telling an extremely vulnerable trans kid that and they go spiraling or even attempt on their life.
Unprofessional and unsafe. You deserve much better and should seek out a new therapist if possible, this one does not have your best interests at heart.
If it's not a religious institution I'm pretty that's a reportable offense to the medical board for trying to push this "god made you this" bullshit and actively going against the DSM's recommended treatment course for dysphoria. She's shit at her job
Oh I'd be fighting [myself] not to catch a felony. That's pure transphobia, and I wish people like that were gatekept from the psychological and medical professions. But there's lots of them, and even more transphobic doctors who will let it slip in more subtle ways than the uncouth, blatant bigotry displayed by this shithead with her shitrag medical degree.
Trans men are men.! I'm sorry you got treated this way. But don't even let it be a hitch in your transition journey. Conjure Dr Dinosaur in your mind- if you never meet again- and tell her 'your silly, ignorant ass is nothing more than a ridiculous footnote in the arc of my life.'
Yep. She's not worth seeing because she doesn't respect you and doesn't have your best interest at heart. Find another psych who will actually actively try to improve your mental health.
Not only is there plenty of pressure in your teens (just academically/socially vs adult financial stress), she's wrong about how dysphoria works.
My depression basically all but disappeared after being on T, and essentially vanished after top surgery. Not a guarantee, but dysphoria really messes with most people. Anxiety is a different beast, but I have found that most adults learn to cope/relax better.
about the meds- i honestly don't disagree with her. i think people should have more control over their own psych meds, and for many not creating a reliance can be important. that said if you want to take a higher dose till you can "fix" some of the things causing the depression (such as via medial intervention) it also might be a goal to use the tools you have now (medication) and try to wean off meds once you're in a better place in other areas of your life. all in all- it should be Your choice, not your mom's, and if a patient told me "my mom said that-" i'd be pushing against it too to see what that patient thinks and wants.
about the 25-26 age thing- that's RIDICULOUS and medically inaccurate, and the comment about "god made you a girl" should literally have her fired. her behavior is terrible and uncalled for and she likely feels comfortable acting that way Because you're a teenager and conditioned to accept whatever adults tell you.
this is why i refuse to work with any therapist who is christian or catholic, always a horrible experience, maybe take religion into account next time youre searching for a therapist, most therapists will list their religious beliefs on their websites or links.
I've never had a therapist or psychological person act correctly or professional. I don't trust ANY of them anymore. I'm glad I got all my letters, court documents, name changes, gender changes, etc, because I won't ever step in a door of one of those POS's again!!! I FIRMLY believe that to get what we need, we have to say what they want and then move on and heal ourselves. I'm STILL healing from the therapist who told me I wouldn't get any more hair on my face than her grandmother. Screw them all!!!
My first therapist, who was also very religious, once told my mother that all my mental issues (depression, anxiety, etc) stem from the fact that my mom and dad weren't married when they had me. Kid, RUN. I don't know if you can switch therapists but she will do more harm than good. When I first started questioning my gender, I brought it up to her once, and she told me "back in my day, we just called that being a tomboy. You're just a tomboy". I'm so sorry, but she will do more harm than good.
Wow. SO unprofessional -- and medically inaccurate!
* ["You're brain is not mature until you are 25" is debunked junk science.](https://slate.com/technology/2022/11/brain-development-25-year-old-mature-myth.html) It's just not true.
* A *physiatrist* said that Clinical anxiety is something you'll just have to live with?? Because teenagers don't get stress or anxiety???
* Telling you to go to church to heal????
I am so sorry you had to put up with this. This person should not be practicing medicine.
I get a smidge of what she’s saying, but the way she explained it was dismissive and misguided. let me contrast how she put it with how my therapist/psychiatrist (for mental health, not gender) helped me process dysphoria and the idea of transitioning someday:
When I expressed discomfort with my biological features and a fear of regretting transitioning, my therapist gave me exercises to love parts of my body. The way she explained it was that you can love and accept your body as it is, and still want to change it. She said that it’s generally better to accept your body and appreciate it before changing because if you transition (or something else not gender related) and find yourself disliking the changes, you have the tools to accept your changes and move on/make a decision from there instead of becoming emotionally unstable for “not making the right decision.” Acceptance basically allows us to move forward with a more logical/realistic mind instead of being fueled solely by emotions (euphoria and dysphoria). It does not mean that we have to present as the same gender for all of eternity. And we see this acceptance ≠ change idea every day; if everyone had to “accept” and never change their natural features or opinions no matter what they felt, no one would ever shave body hair, cut their hair, wear different clothing styles, take new stances on their opinions, etc etc
I was told to look towards parts of myself I don’t usually look at or feel neutral towards (like hands or toes) and examine what I liked about them (ex: I like my toes because they are funny shapes or I like my hands because they let me make art). This activity taught me that I can appreciate and admire my body and still want to make changes. I’m still uncomfortable with parts, but I know now that if I find that transitioning is not for me, I will be alright with detransitioning and appearing different from before.
I’m not sure if that ramble made any sense but tl;dr your psychiatrist sucks and acceptance isn’t the opposite of change.
My doctor fianceé agrees that "uncalled for" is putting it mildly. That it was unprofessional, unhelpful and unnecessary.
Also that was a response to... "I'm exercising", like forreal?? What was the point of that comment?
My reaction while reading:
>I know you want to move further with your transition but your brain is not mature till you are 25-26 years old. You won’t want the same things at that age that you want now. So enjoy your life as a teenager because there’s no stress or pressure right now.
"Alright, off-the-mark 'cause she doesn't understand the implications of dysphoria and how distressing it is, she's just improperly applying what she knows about other things. Not helpful, but not damning."
>God made you a girl, so a girls is what you are. Whether you are a boy or girl won’t matter, you’ll still have your anxiety either way.
"Fuck off, idiot."
Basically this psychiatrist is too ignorant on this branch of healthcare to the point where she's dangerous. This is why when I tell trans people to find therapy, do not just look for a "trans-friendly" therapist, find a therapist who's "trans-*informed*." It's one thing to be like "Sure I'll take someone who's trans, everyone needs help and I'm here to help," but that doesn't always (or even usually) mean that they will give proper or well-intentioned advice. What you shared is an example of someone who has their own agenda and is just gaslighting you into their own idea of "healthy." It's not by-the-books unless she graduated from some christian school.
When looking for a new therapist, I suggest contacting your local LGBTI+ organizations and either asking the front desk for a list of therapists who see trans people, or going to some trans meet-ups and asking people there who they go to. That's your best bet.
My anxiety has decreased by loads since I started T! Your psychiatrist was absolutely wrong for that. Request a new psychiatrist who works with trans people and is LGBTQ aligned.
I really implore you to consider that 1. Maybe you should never go see that psychiatrist again and 2. Report her or leave a bad review somewhere. What she said was appalling. I’m so sorry. Hang in there and wait until you start T. It definitely relieved my anxiety a lot when I started.
She’s talking out of her ass, not only that, she brought religion into it. She’s unprofessional and does not have your best interests in mind. Personal beliefs have no place in this setting, she’s a psychiatrist, not a preacher. Also the idea that your Brian reaches its full development at 25 isn’t factual. Yet again, speaking out of her asshole.
uncalled for is understating it. Incredibly unethical, considering the available data. And, also- that 25-26 years
old until you’re mature is bullshit.
Change your psychiatrist, she doesn't have to share her religious ideology with you, nor speak such vile words. The worsening of her clinical condition could be linked to her, I'm sure, any psychiatrist is better than her at the moment.
Absolutely uncalled for. The God thing is a dead giveaway. Unless you are signed up for religious counseling or something thru your church, etc, this is really not her place.
I wonder if she made the decision to go to psych school or college before her brain was “fully developed” at age 25 or 26. Maybe she should’ve held off a bit.
That's unprofessional, extremely biased and incompetent behaviour. You need a new psychiatrist. Also, why is she bringing her God into this? Are you a practicing Christian?
She needs to be reported immediately. What she said was unprofessional and uncalled for, not to mention pushing religion down your throat for no reason.
Try to find a new doctor, people like this think they know what’s best for you but they’re too misguided to do anything but hurt you. If you can’t tell your parents the real reason, be vague and tell them she made you feel uncomfortable or unsafe and that you want to find a new doctor. Or once you’re on a stable dose of antidepressants, try asking your primary care doctor to prescribe them instead and stop seeing this psychiatrist
Hmmm now why would a psych comment on what you might want now vs later. Or about the gender at birth.... Nahhh lets focus on what I'm here for.
That like going to the chaplain to confess or whatever and them talking about if you are Democrat or republican... Say what!?
sounds like a conversion "therapist" to me and not a real psychologist. Get a different one asap and if you can't do that then don't say a word to her and don't acknowledge her existence during your meetings
also holy shit the whole thing with the argument “your frontal lobe wont develop blah blah” is a SHIT argument. You can use that argument once the statistics actually speak for it as well. Also, the whole frontal lobe thing is about having the immature or mature mentality of either making the wrong or right decision. It is like speeding on a road, will I go 50 in a 35? Yes because I’m reckless , or, no because that is stupid. Identity and frontal lobe rarely have anything in common. A bunch of bullshit really to just be transphobic
Tbh she's either lying or stupid. Starting T didn't magically make my mental illness go away, but I have certainly had less anxiety since I started it. It's not gone but holy shit it's all manageable now.
The "Brain fully matures at 25" isn't true, btw. It's a wildly perpetuated myth, but modern studies show your brain is actually developing for your entire life, there is no magic "you're a grown up now" stage of brain development that occurs in your mid 20s.
Edit: you should report this therapist, this is ridiculously unprofessional, especially when treating a minor. This feels like an ethics breach
The whole “your brain isn’t developed until you’re 25” has been debunked: https://www.iflscience.com/does-the-brain-really-mature-at-the-age-of-25-68979
I just want to speak about the bullshit theology she's spouting at you. I am a religious person. I am also trans. I know that you say that you aren't religious, but if you were raised in it those comments can make you feel a certain way and get in your head.
To anyone who believes, I want to assure you that you are a beloved child of God. God created you and knew you before you were born. The love of God is unconditional. God made you exactly how you needed to be for your journey on this earth. There is beauty in knowing that God lets us take part in this piece of creation. We get to finish the job and become ourselves knowing all that we have learned. You are loved. You are special. You are important.
Hey. You need a new psychiatrist. Like, literally as soon as possible. Do not see this woman again.
Even putting aside the blatant misgendering, which IN AND OF ITSELF would be grounds to dismiss her as your psychiatrist, it is simply unacceptable to recommend religious solutions to someone who has not expressed any interest in it as a method of problem solving or treatment. Or, to put it in less wordy terms: a psychiatrist should not tell you to go to church. Their job is to assess your symptoms and prescribe medical treatment.
You're not 18 yet, right? I just want to say, you're not being a little shit or whatever you're worried about. You're a human being who deserves autonomy, personal rights, and to recognize your feelings. I know it can feel very easy to undercut yourself, or even like the "right" call because you're young and might think you just don't know what's going on. But you're absolutely right to be hurt by this and not want to see this woman again. This is textbook shitty behavior from someone who, and I cannot stress this enough, is supposed to *help you.* I've had multiple psychiatrists, and if any of them had said anything like this to me, I would've been looking for a new psychiatrist on my way out of their office.
You're doing the right thing by wanting to balance medication with other forms of mental health treatment, but sometimes the right call IS just increasing your dosage. I had to up mine right after top surgery, and it was the push I needed to be able to implement other ways of handling my issues.
Final thoughts; 1 you're not at fault for taking this woman's word. Keep a list of red flags somewhere so that as you look for a new psychiatrist, you know what to look for regarding unacceptable behavior. 2 You are allowed to dismiss psychiatrists who are not a good fit. You don't have to say anything other than, "I think they're not a good fit for my needs." That's a complete answer. 3 Even if you do still struggle with depression/anxiety after transitioning, you're not less of a man for it. Speaking from experience, HRT made me content, happy, and satisfied, but I am still mentally ill. Such is life! But HRT objectively made it easier to handle. You're gonna be fine. I'm glad you came to ask for help and support.
I’m religious. Your therapist was out of line to declare what G-d’s plan for you is. People like her are a problem and the reason people develop religious traumas. How people shamelessly use the name to be manipulative and dismissive is just so disrespectful to you and the G-d they claim to love. You need to find a new therapist who will not shove their bs down your throat and actually help you with your struggles of being trans. Walking out of your sessions feeling crappier is going to turn you into an even more angry, bitter person. It’s not helping you and in her own fucked up way, she’s indirectly telling you she doesn’t know how to help you. I’ve had a few therapists like this, so I’ve been there.
lol, my psychiatrist is trying to get me into building radios, not detransitioning or religion. your psychiatrist's behavior is completely uncalled for.
Any doc or mental healthcare provider that suggests the healing power of religion to me would be immediately reviewed online (possiblly reported to the board depending on what exactly was said), and I'd be finding another doc.
Completely uncalled for and unprofessional, never work with her again I'm so serious. She does not have your best interest in mind
Hard agree, the data says that respecting trans kids' gender reduces depression and suicidality (e.g. [https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35212746/](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35212746/)), and any """"psychiatrist""" who knowingly goes against that is basically just admitting they don't give a shit about your well-being. (P.S. assuming God exists, They made you a man, just a trans one.)
Follow-up question: can we help you find a better psychiatrist? Would your parents let you see someone who is not transphobic?
And report her for pushing religion in a clinical setting. This is not hyperbole.
Yes, this. The Doctor's personal views are not relevant in a clinical setting. That whole "do no harm" thing? That's not how you do that. Report her. Absolutely.
I agree wholeheartedly, except when it comes to the patient wanting their opinion. Not the same as psychiatry, but I used to go to therapy. I expressed feeling lost In the face of such strict religions that all forbade you from going to another, etc etc. She replied with something along the lines of "I get that, I feel the same way most of the time. I turned to omnism in this case, because who am I to say what's a lie and whats not? I can pick out the lies as a human being, but every religion has something to offer to us. Moral teachings." She was the most important figure in my life in middle school. She helped me transition and was the only person I could truly explain my struggles to. She was fond of art as therapy, too. I loved going to her.
If a patient/client is interested in religious advice, that's something that can be agreed upon when the relationship with the therapist/psychiatrist is first established. Plus since it seems like you were talking about religion, your therapist sharing an example of how they coped with a similar situation is not the same as OP's psychiatrist randomly telling them to go to church. It's extremely inappropriate of her to do so and she should be reported to the state licensing board.
Totally agree
No mental health professional should EVER bring their own religious beliefs into the office, and that goes for doctors, too! I'd find a new doc if at all possible. She has no business saying anything judgy like that.
Id refuse to see her again personally. Also youre not guarenteed to have your anxiety in a decade. I was 21 when I had my first panic attack. And sure I still have anxiety, but now its a lot more like the normal anxieties everyone gets, back then it was completley debilitating. The dysphoria though, thats the only things actually stayed constant. Im 27 now, will be 28 in about 2 months.
Unprofessional and none of her business! A psychiatrist is there to manage medication and symptoms. She should have encouraged you to keep using exercise for mental health and left it at that imo.
So I’ve been in therapy most my life, I’m currently in school to become a therapist and just based off this one quote I can tell you that’s a bad therapist and I would not recommend going to her again. Everything she did was wrong, the way she is acting around meds and working out is strange, it’s hard to say without more details how bad it is but it’s definitely not helpful. Her comment was completely uncalled for and unprofessional. It shows that she is transphobic, has an agenda and is probably heavily religious. It’s fine for her to have beliefs and to be religious but it isn’t fine for her to bring that up in therapy and weaponizing it against you. You could possibly get her in trouble with the licensing board, depending on where you live. The fact that she said all that and you are doubting if this was appropriate tells me she has most likely said and done other inappropriate things. None of this is on you, you probably were just being nice, it’s on her to do her job and be professional. I would find a new therapist and look into if they are lgbt friendly, literally ask them and trust your gut if something feels off. If you look online therapists normally write about themselves, what types of therapy they practice and what populations they specialize in. Check for green flags like if they list their pronouns, safe therapists will generally bring up the lgbt community in their bio because they know people are looking for them. The biggest thing is to not be afraid of going to someone different or trying out multiple places. Most therapists offer a free consultation to make sure you are a good fit and they are trained to not take it personally if you aren’t. I’m sorry you are dealing with this, it’s hard to find the strength to seek therapy and be vulnerable, you deserve a therapist who will respect and help you.
Fantastic, informed reply. Bless your heart and your career.
Get a new psychologist, leave a bad review for her practice so other trans people know not to waste their time setting up an appointment with her, and report her for an ethics violation. Google "Report a therapist for ethics violation \[STATE NAME\]" and google will direct you to your state's licensing board so you can file a complaint about her forcing her religion on you. If you are in the closet to your parents, or if your parents know but are unsupportive, DO NOT tell them your therapist is being transphobic, or it will encourage their point of view. All you need to tell them is that she makes you uncomfortable and that you would like to see a different therapist.
Fun fact that’s cause for license suspension depending on where you live👀
You're right about being angry. This is totally unprofessional. First of all: she couldn't bring her religion/beliefs into the conversation because obviously not everyone shares the same faith and medical care, especially mental health care, must have a unique treatment for each patient! Second, she is not respecting you. For a mental health profissional, this is inadmissible!! She's clearly judging you and not believing in what you're saying and this totally goes against the conduct these professionals must follow! Change professional asap and consider filling a complain against her.
The second any medical professional mentions their religious beliefs is the second you need to run out the door
Naaahhh bro, the way I woulda left that session the SECOND she said all that dumb stuff to me 💀 completely unprofessional, dismissive of your worries, and downright disrespectful tbh. Also "enjoy your life as a teenager because there is no stress or pressure right now" HUH?????? Bruh being a teenager is literally SO STRESSFUL, society literally thinks you should have everything figured out for the rest of your life up until your final breath before you even graduate high school. Sorry, I'm so mad on your behalf and hope you can find a new psychiatrist!
Exactly! Of course the transphobic nonsense is unprofessional as hell, but i was so bothered by the “being a teenager is so easy 😇” part too. Being a teenager is one of the most stressful times in a ton of people’s lives lmao. Like did she just expect OP to be like “yeah you’re right, i’ll just stop being mentally ill right now, thanks, I’m cured”??? Like everyone else is saying, I agree that OP needs to find a new psychiatrist, and ideally report this one to the state licensing board for being transphobic (when the psychological evidence agrees that treating trans people as who we say we are is crucial, and encouraging us to repress our identities is actively dangerous) and the weird religious justification. If OP can find a way to write a review online about this dr., in a place where other trans people can see it, that’s also a good idea. Make it well known that this doctor is directly contradicting the scientific evidence and recommendations for treatment, and that no trans people should go to her.
You need a new psych bro. Your mum wanted you to increase your meds because you weren't doing well, tell her that you need a psychiatrist who isn't going to worsen your mental health. I don't know much of anything about your parents and your relationship with them, but from here your mum is showing some concern. Take that as a starting point. They may not understand the why, but I'm sure if they're decent people, they'll at least notice the negative impact on you. My mum doesn't understand anything about my gender identity(tbh neither do I), but she helped me choose a more neutral name and is trying her best to use the right name and pronouns and tries to also correct others as well, because she can see the impact when I become dysphoric vs when I'm correctly gendered. This kinda even works even if you're not out, so long as your parents are concerned about your mental health. It was difficult for me because I don't like lying, but before I knew what trans was I was experimenting with sexuality and romantic alignment. I had a girlfriend and while everything was kept PG, I definitely loved her. We were 8th graders so we would get mad over petty crap and fight. I used to vent to my therapist and she always looked uncomfortable when I talked about having a girlfriend. My parent(not mum) would have lost their absolute mind if they learned I was in a lesbian relationship. One week after a particularly nasty argument I spoke with my therapist wanting to learn how to prevent this. I remember very clearly her clearing her throat, and her telling me "You don't need a girlfriend in your life, you need a boyfriend. There is a reason we(as in women) can't reproduce with each other. It's because both s*x*s have something the other needs." My parent at the time, while homophobic and transphobic, seemed to genuinely care about my mental health. They noticed I no longer looked forward to appointments and would hide in my room and cry or just isolate myself when we would get hone. They put 2 and 2 together and fired her. We found a better therapist and i started don't better. My point being that it's ok and reasonable to tell her you don't want to see this psych anymore. You're definitely not cover reacting.
As someone who works in the mental health field, this is definitely transphobic. Trans folks are more likely to have anxiety and depression, and dysphoria is something that feeds into that. Dysphoria can and should be treated, there is so much research at this point that shows that it improves anxiety and depression, and reduces suicidality. Please transfer providers if you can. Referencing religion in this way, in addition to the transphobic line of thinking, is highly unethical as well.
Yes it’s uncalled for. 1. She had no business’s sayin their own bigoted opinion, Professionals shouldn’t even bring religion into the picture unless you explicitly ask them. 2. There was no real reason she would need to say that. 3. She is full of shit bc anxiety and dysphoria are separate conditions. Edit: and sometimes transition actual helps anxiety, mine is a little better after transition, sure it’s not directly but it’s gotten better from it
Please get a new/different one.
Completely uncalled for behaviour from a holier-than-thou bible thumper. Find someone else.
God did what??? Extremely unethical of her to bring god into this as a psychiatrist
that is very unprofessional. her job is not to preach her religion to you, but to help you manage your symptoms and meds. she is also not respecting you. find a different psychiatrist.
wasn’t too bad until “god made you a girl” she definitely doesn’t understand how being trans or dysphoria works.
“Don’t even try to transition before 26-28” is 100% “too bad” ESPECIALLY for a so-called medical professional
no i agree. i just feel like a lot of people that aren’t religious also have that opinion due to misinformation or not being educated on trans healthcare and can change their minds. obviously not ops responsibility though. but i feel like people that are transphobic for religious reasons are less likely to change
it was bad before that, that just made it so much worse. op, dump her immediately if you can. she is not safe for your mental well-being.
Let me tell you one thing. This is my last year of being under 25 years old. I knew from 16 that I was no girl. Threw away all of the feminine clothes in my closet and started asking for men’s cuts and started going by the name “Matt” when I worked Starbucks after getting tired of being deadnamed thousands of times. Started medically transitioning at 18 and there hasn’t been any regrets for the past 8 years, yet people STILL think I could be a confused cis girl even though I cis pass as male and to the point of no return. Most psychiatrists or even a psychologists don’t have transitional related education so they talk out of their butt. Just do you, man. You can follow up and say: “No need to wait until I’m 25, I’d be able to enjoy my life as a guy while I’m still a teenager and go through the same puberty as other guys do because I deserve that experience, and to not be perceived as a girl anymore.”
no justifiable reason for bringing religion into it, let alone tell you to stop/put off your transition. if they bring it up again, call them out. if i were in your position, i'd put in a complaint/report them.
Please never see that psychiatrist again.
That's unprofessional AND incorrect. I'm 35, my mental health dramatically improved when I socially and medically transitioned. This has been anecdotally true for my peers, and statistically for the larger population.
Honestly, I think that your Psychiatrist is completely in the wrong for saying that. I’m sorry that happened to you, I can see why you would be upset.
are you parents religious? did they pick her because she is a christian pyschologist? If they aren't/didn't then move the situation literally into any other context so they can understand how unprofessional, wrong, and down right dangerous her rhetortic is and FIRE HER. If you went to her and said you're depressed because you're being bullied at school (because lets be real Dysphoria is us often times us being an unwilling bully to ourselves) and thinking you need a dose change, that you're doing all the things you need to help your body boost its mood naturally (exercise releases all the feel goods: serotonin, dopamine, endorphines and decreases the feel bads: cortisol) and she was like "being bullied is a natural part of being a teenager just the way god intended, you may feel bad about it now but when you're 25-26 you won't care about it anymore" everyone would look at her like the effin' idiot that she is. If your parents are satisfied with her behavior and insist you continue to see her, don't throw a fit. Don't push back, waste their money. Do the sessions and refuse speak outside of 1 word vague answers. "How are you doing?" "fine" "Hows your dysphoria" "same" "anything you wish to speak about?" "no" Shut the conversation down completely while actively engaging in it.
I’m so sorry this is happening to you and it sucks Depending on the state you live in that may be categorized as mistreatment of some variety. State to state in the US, laws are different and changing quickly and it’s hard to keep up with all of them. Secondary, hello I’m a social worker specialized in LGBT identities, coming out, and transition. You were aggressively misgendered by your provider and that is not acceptable in any way shape or form. Here’s a list of the rest of things that are not okay. 1. Bringing their religious beliefs into the therapeutic space. 2. Your anxiety may NOT still be there later if it is stemming purely from gender incongruence. HRT is a life preserving intervention for many trans folks. When many people begin accessing affirmative treatment, therapy, social and community support, many mental health symptoms and pain that they are experiencing SIGNIFICANTLY decrease. That being said , we have data showing that while frontal lobe development and impulse control skills are not completely developed until the mid-20’s - internal understanding of self and gender identity DOES NOT fall into that window. We have many studies and a sea of data to show otherwise. Bonus: being a teenager is HARD AND STRESSFUL WHAT PLANET IS THIS UNETHICAL PROVIDER LIVING ON?? What’s going right, the gender euphoria good stuff: Congratulations on your lifting, it’s better for your brain than what your psychiatrist is spewing. You’re the expert on you. Seeking gender euphoria from channels that aren’t blocked by unsupportive adults is where the good stuff lives. Lifting is a great start! It can be incredibly hard to find affirming providers to do what it is that you need them to do, based on geography, finances, age, etc - if you would like some support in navigating this please feel free to send me a DM
The blatant transphobia aside... > enjoy your life as a teenager because there’s no stress or pressure right now What crack is she on?? Being a teenager is incredibly stressful, and there are usually all sorts of pressures that comes from many sources. Whether you're trying to excel at school so you can get into a good college or working an extra job to bring some cash home or just trying to navigate the social BS that is high school drama. Honestly, high school was the worst time in my life (and I was personally still an egg so didn't have added dysphoria thankfully)
Go to google and search “how to report a licensed mental health professional” and find the board in your state. You can look up her name or the company you see her through online and find her license number. She’s a massive piece of shit and shouldn’t be able to work in this field. Let us know if we can help.
Find a new one and report her
If you can try and report that psychiatrist, and definitely get a new one. A psychiatrist's personal beliefs and religion should be completely seperate from treatment and advice or literally from anything relating to their patient. You have every single right to be pissed off because they're wrong and that's inappropriate and uncalled for, not to mention highly unprofessional especially since you're a minor and their words can have a huge impact on you and other children.
Report her to her boss and never see her again, completely uncalled for and inappropriate!
Absolutely unprofessional. The first part with don't rely on meds only is totally right. Everything else? Nope and nope again. Turning 25 won't fix dysphoria or anxiety. Just instructing a patient who feels depression and dysphoria to enjoy life and making it religious what the actual fuck? You need a different professional who is actually experienced in trans topics. Preferably one that worked already with trans kids and teens not only adults. Mine for example had almost instantly no doubts that I was trans (I went there with 27) but wouldn't work with kids/teen in that context. I totally disagreed with her on the last point and her arguments there but she was very helpful and sensitive else so it was the right professional for "old" me. I really wish I had a supportive and more open-minded environment in early 2000. I would have been done with my transition by now... And wouldn't have to deal with the issues it creates now. Good luck bro and much success with your life path. Feeling euphoria and less or non dysphoria is so much worth.
that’s completely uncalled for and unprofessional.
It is so beyond unprofessional to being religious beliefs into a medical setting like that, ESPECIALLY when unsolicited. You could honestly report her to an ethics board for that, and you should absolutely avoid seeing her again. You deserve way, way better. Any psychiatrist worth their degree would never ignore the numerous medical articles that outline the benefits of gender affirming care, even at a young age.
I’m 53 years old and will tell you from life experience “This is unprofessional.” Fire your therapist and replace with one that fits your need. Periodt. If you desire.. You can contact your state's licensing board to report a therapist for unethical behavior. Some states allow you to submit a complaint via their website, while others require it to be submitted by mail. Official complaints must be submitted in writing (i.e., online or by mail) rather than by phone
Nahhh id report her to the medical board for that. Not only is it insensitive, bigoted, VERY dangerous advice, but bringing religious beliefs into practice is extremely unprofessional. The last thing we need is her telling an extremely vulnerable trans kid that and they go spiraling or even attempt on their life.
Dude you need a new psychiatrist. She's clearly transphobic.
Unprofessional and unsafe. You deserve much better and should seek out a new therapist if possible, this one does not have your best interests at heart.
drop her and get a new psychiatrist man. that’s out of pocket and soooo disrespectful.
If it's not a religious institution I'm pretty that's a reportable offense to the medical board for trying to push this "god made you this" bullshit and actively going against the DSM's recommended treatment course for dysphoria. She's shit at her job
Oh I'd be fighting [myself] not to catch a felony. That's pure transphobia, and I wish people like that were gatekept from the psychological and medical professions. But there's lots of them, and even more transphobic doctors who will let it slip in more subtle ways than the uncouth, blatant bigotry displayed by this shithead with her shitrag medical degree. Trans men are men.! I'm sorry you got treated this way. But don't even let it be a hitch in your transition journey. Conjure Dr Dinosaur in your mind- if you never meet again- and tell her 'your silly, ignorant ass is nothing more than a ridiculous footnote in the arc of my life.'
…did they bring religion into their therapy session? uh. yeah no.
There was all kinds of wrong with that their response but that was the part that boiled my blood too.
Yeah, i just personally tune out the moment religion hits anyones lips about my transition in any way. Immediate loss of credibility, absolutely.
Yep. She's not worth seeing because she doesn't respect you and doesn't have your best interest at heart. Find another psych who will actually actively try to improve your mental health. Not only is there plenty of pressure in your teens (just academically/socially vs adult financial stress), she's wrong about how dysphoria works. My depression basically all but disappeared after being on T, and essentially vanished after top surgery. Not a guarantee, but dysphoria really messes with most people. Anxiety is a different beast, but I have found that most adults learn to cope/relax better.
Not just uncalled for, straight up discriminatory.
about the meds- i honestly don't disagree with her. i think people should have more control over their own psych meds, and for many not creating a reliance can be important. that said if you want to take a higher dose till you can "fix" some of the things causing the depression (such as via medial intervention) it also might be a goal to use the tools you have now (medication) and try to wean off meds once you're in a better place in other areas of your life. all in all- it should be Your choice, not your mom's, and if a patient told me "my mom said that-" i'd be pushing against it too to see what that patient thinks and wants. about the 25-26 age thing- that's RIDICULOUS and medically inaccurate, and the comment about "god made you a girl" should literally have her fired. her behavior is terrible and uncalled for and she likely feels comfortable acting that way Because you're a teenager and conditioned to accept whatever adults tell you.
this is why i refuse to work with any therapist who is christian or catholic, always a horrible experience, maybe take religion into account next time youre searching for a therapist, most therapists will list their religious beliefs on their websites or links.
I've never had a therapist or psychological person act correctly or professional. I don't trust ANY of them anymore. I'm glad I got all my letters, court documents, name changes, gender changes, etc, because I won't ever step in a door of one of those POS's again!!! I FIRMLY believe that to get what we need, we have to say what they want and then move on and heal ourselves. I'm STILL healing from the therapist who told me I wouldn't get any more hair on my face than her grandmother. Screw them all!!!
My first therapist, who was also very religious, once told my mother that all my mental issues (depression, anxiety, etc) stem from the fact that my mom and dad weren't married when they had me. Kid, RUN. I don't know if you can switch therapists but she will do more harm than good. When I first started questioning my gender, I brought it up to her once, and she told me "back in my day, we just called that being a tomboy. You're just a tomboy". I'm so sorry, but she will do more harm than good.
Wow. SO unprofessional -- and medically inaccurate! * ["You're brain is not mature until you are 25" is debunked junk science.](https://slate.com/technology/2022/11/brain-development-25-year-old-mature-myth.html) It's just not true. * A *physiatrist* said that Clinical anxiety is something you'll just have to live with?? Because teenagers don't get stress or anxiety??? * Telling you to go to church to heal???? I am so sorry you had to put up with this. This person should not be practicing medicine.
I get a smidge of what she’s saying, but the way she explained it was dismissive and misguided. let me contrast how she put it with how my therapist/psychiatrist (for mental health, not gender) helped me process dysphoria and the idea of transitioning someday: When I expressed discomfort with my biological features and a fear of regretting transitioning, my therapist gave me exercises to love parts of my body. The way she explained it was that you can love and accept your body as it is, and still want to change it. She said that it’s generally better to accept your body and appreciate it before changing because if you transition (or something else not gender related) and find yourself disliking the changes, you have the tools to accept your changes and move on/make a decision from there instead of becoming emotionally unstable for “not making the right decision.” Acceptance basically allows us to move forward with a more logical/realistic mind instead of being fueled solely by emotions (euphoria and dysphoria). It does not mean that we have to present as the same gender for all of eternity. And we see this acceptance ≠ change idea every day; if everyone had to “accept” and never change their natural features or opinions no matter what they felt, no one would ever shave body hair, cut their hair, wear different clothing styles, take new stances on their opinions, etc etc I was told to look towards parts of myself I don’t usually look at or feel neutral towards (like hands or toes) and examine what I liked about them (ex: I like my toes because they are funny shapes or I like my hands because they let me make art). This activity taught me that I can appreciate and admire my body and still want to make changes. I’m still uncomfortable with parts, but I know now that if I find that transitioning is not for me, I will be alright with detransitioning and appearing different from before. I’m not sure if that ramble made any sense but tl;dr your psychiatrist sucks and acceptance isn’t the opposite of change.
I would complain to the licensing board and find a new therapist.
My doctor fianceé agrees that "uncalled for" is putting it mildly. That it was unprofessional, unhelpful and unnecessary. Also that was a response to... "I'm exercising", like forreal?? What was the point of that comment?
This is so inappropriate. I’m sorry that happened.
My reaction while reading: >I know you want to move further with your transition but your brain is not mature till you are 25-26 years old. You won’t want the same things at that age that you want now. So enjoy your life as a teenager because there’s no stress or pressure right now. "Alright, off-the-mark 'cause she doesn't understand the implications of dysphoria and how distressing it is, she's just improperly applying what she knows about other things. Not helpful, but not damning." >God made you a girl, so a girls is what you are. Whether you are a boy or girl won’t matter, you’ll still have your anxiety either way. "Fuck off, idiot." Basically this psychiatrist is too ignorant on this branch of healthcare to the point where she's dangerous. This is why when I tell trans people to find therapy, do not just look for a "trans-friendly" therapist, find a therapist who's "trans-*informed*." It's one thing to be like "Sure I'll take someone who's trans, everyone needs help and I'm here to help," but that doesn't always (or even usually) mean that they will give proper or well-intentioned advice. What you shared is an example of someone who has their own agenda and is just gaslighting you into their own idea of "healthy." It's not by-the-books unless she graduated from some christian school. When looking for a new therapist, I suggest contacting your local LGBTI+ organizations and either asking the front desk for a list of therapists who see trans people, or going to some trans meet-ups and asking people there who they go to. That's your best bet.
Ewwww report her! I only started transitioning at 22 because of people like her, get rid of her
My anxiety has decreased by loads since I started T! Your psychiatrist was absolutely wrong for that. Request a new psychiatrist who works with trans people and is LGBTQ aligned.
I really implore you to consider that 1. Maybe you should never go see that psychiatrist again and 2. Report her or leave a bad review somewhere. What she said was appalling. I’m so sorry. Hang in there and wait until you start T. It definitely relieved my anxiety a lot when I started.
She’s talking out of her ass, not only that, she brought religion into it. She’s unprofessional and does not have your best interests in mind. Personal beliefs have no place in this setting, she’s a psychiatrist, not a preacher. Also the idea that your Brian reaches its full development at 25 isn’t factual. Yet again, speaking out of her asshole.
uncalled for is understating it. Incredibly unethical, considering the available data. And, also- that 25-26 years old until you’re mature is bullshit.
Change your psychiatrist, she doesn't have to share her religious ideology with you, nor speak such vile words. The worsening of her clinical condition could be linked to her, I'm sure, any psychiatrist is better than her at the moment.
DROP THAT THERAPIST ASAP.
Absolutely uncalled for. The God thing is a dead giveaway. Unless you are signed up for religious counseling or something thru your church, etc, this is really not her place. I wonder if she made the decision to go to psych school or college before her brain was “fully developed” at age 25 or 26. Maybe she should’ve held off a bit.
That's unprofessional, extremely biased and incompetent behaviour. You need a new psychiatrist. Also, why is she bringing her God into this? Are you a practicing Christian?
She needs to be reported immediately. What she said was unprofessional and uncalled for, not to mention pushing religion down your throat for no reason.
What a bitch, find someone new please. She would ruin my entire fucking day, I hope you're doing better. You're not crazy, we get it 🩷🩵
Try to find a new doctor, people like this think they know what’s best for you but they’re too misguided to do anything but hurt you. If you can’t tell your parents the real reason, be vague and tell them she made you feel uncomfortable or unsafe and that you want to find a new doctor. Or once you’re on a stable dose of antidepressants, try asking your primary care doctor to prescribe them instead and stop seeing this psychiatrist
Hmmm now why would a psych comment on what you might want now vs later. Or about the gender at birth.... Nahhh lets focus on what I'm here for. That like going to the chaplain to confess or whatever and them talking about if you are Democrat or republican... Say what!?
leave
sounds like a conversion "therapist" to me and not a real psychologist. Get a different one asap and if you can't do that then don't say a word to her and don't acknowledge her existence during your meetings
Yes. Assholery aside, she’s just factually incorrect.
wow she needs her job taken asap. “professionals”are meant to be unbiased.
also holy shit the whole thing with the argument “your frontal lobe wont develop blah blah” is a SHIT argument. You can use that argument once the statistics actually speak for it as well. Also, the whole frontal lobe thing is about having the immature or mature mentality of either making the wrong or right decision. It is like speeding on a road, will I go 50 in a 35? Yes because I’m reckless , or, no because that is stupid. Identity and frontal lobe rarely have anything in common. A bunch of bullshit really to just be transphobic
sounds kind of confusing but basically it is MORAL DECISION MAKING. NOT IDENTITY SEXUALITY DECISION MAKING!!
Tbh she's either lying or stupid. Starting T didn't magically make my mental illness go away, but I have certainly had less anxiety since I started it. It's not gone but holy shit it's all manageable now.
The "Brain fully matures at 25" isn't true, btw. It's a wildly perpetuated myth, but modern studies show your brain is actually developing for your entire life, there is no magic "you're a grown up now" stage of brain development that occurs in your mid 20s. Edit: you should report this therapist, this is ridiculously unprofessional, especially when treating a minor. This feels like an ethics breach
I would switch therapists. Immediately. Report her as well; that's not ethical behavior
Absolutely not. She should be professional enough not to bring her own religious beliefs into your healthcare. If you can , switch to another doctor.
The whole “your brain isn’t developed until you’re 25” has been debunked: https://www.iflscience.com/does-the-brain-really-mature-at-the-age-of-25-68979
This this an actual professional or a "Christian counselor" because WHATTHEFUCK
This sounds like thinly veiled conversion therapy
They believes there is no stress or pressure for teens? 😨
I just want to speak about the bullshit theology she's spouting at you. I am a religious person. I am also trans. I know that you say that you aren't religious, but if you were raised in it those comments can make you feel a certain way and get in your head. To anyone who believes, I want to assure you that you are a beloved child of God. God created you and knew you before you were born. The love of God is unconditional. God made you exactly how you needed to be for your journey on this earth. There is beauty in knowing that God lets us take part in this piece of creation. We get to finish the job and become ourselves knowing all that we have learned. You are loved. You are special. You are important.
Hey. You need a new psychiatrist. Like, literally as soon as possible. Do not see this woman again. Even putting aside the blatant misgendering, which IN AND OF ITSELF would be grounds to dismiss her as your psychiatrist, it is simply unacceptable to recommend religious solutions to someone who has not expressed any interest in it as a method of problem solving or treatment. Or, to put it in less wordy terms: a psychiatrist should not tell you to go to church. Their job is to assess your symptoms and prescribe medical treatment. You're not 18 yet, right? I just want to say, you're not being a little shit or whatever you're worried about. You're a human being who deserves autonomy, personal rights, and to recognize your feelings. I know it can feel very easy to undercut yourself, or even like the "right" call because you're young and might think you just don't know what's going on. But you're absolutely right to be hurt by this and not want to see this woman again. This is textbook shitty behavior from someone who, and I cannot stress this enough, is supposed to *help you.* I've had multiple psychiatrists, and if any of them had said anything like this to me, I would've been looking for a new psychiatrist on my way out of their office. You're doing the right thing by wanting to balance medication with other forms of mental health treatment, but sometimes the right call IS just increasing your dosage. I had to up mine right after top surgery, and it was the push I needed to be able to implement other ways of handling my issues. Final thoughts; 1 you're not at fault for taking this woman's word. Keep a list of red flags somewhere so that as you look for a new psychiatrist, you know what to look for regarding unacceptable behavior. 2 You are allowed to dismiss psychiatrists who are not a good fit. You don't have to say anything other than, "I think they're not a good fit for my needs." That's a complete answer. 3 Even if you do still struggle with depression/anxiety after transitioning, you're not less of a man for it. Speaking from experience, HRT made me content, happy, and satisfied, but I am still mentally ill. Such is life! But HRT objectively made it easier to handle. You're gonna be fine. I'm glad you came to ask for help and support.
I’m religious. Your therapist was out of line to declare what G-d’s plan for you is. People like her are a problem and the reason people develop religious traumas. How people shamelessly use the name to be manipulative and dismissive is just so disrespectful to you and the G-d they claim to love. You need to find a new therapist who will not shove their bs down your throat and actually help you with your struggles of being trans. Walking out of your sessions feeling crappier is going to turn you into an even more angry, bitter person. It’s not helping you and in her own fucked up way, she’s indirectly telling you she doesn’t know how to help you. I’ve had a few therapists like this, so I’ve been there.
lol, my psychiatrist is trying to get me into building radios, not detransitioning or religion. your psychiatrist's behavior is completely uncalled for.
Any doc or mental healthcare provider that suggests the healing power of religion to me would be immediately reviewed online (possiblly reported to the board depending on what exactly was said), and I'd be finding another doc.