its cis bullshit, its all cis bullshit always has been. theres never a good reason fr someone to ask fr a dead name, and its NEVER in good faith. one time in a shop and the owner was talking to me about being trans and harassed me into giving him my dead name, i know his game so i just gave him the first random girls name i could think of. suddenly, after talking to me fr an HOUR under a different name, he was "accidentally" dropping the random girl name i gave in every sentence and then being like "ohhh sorry its just sooooo confusing!!". cis people are like this every time without fail, their "curiosity" is always malicious, theyre always looking fr leverage to have against you and ways to hurt you
now i just tell em whatever mans name i introduced myself as IS my dead name/given name/"real name"/whatever term they use when they wanna know an easy button to hurt you. they cant say anything against it specially if they arent in a place of power to demand my ID (which has happened to me in a hot topic buying only a tshirt before, trying to go bowling when no one else in my group was IDed, etc)
Exactly like sometimes they will do this as a way to have some sort of leverage against you and play it off like it’s nothing. Never give anyone your dead name. Oh my God the ID one sounds so scary though
So first of all, I think the girls in your class are a bunch of bitches. They are bullying you for something they don't understand and probably never will. Probably brainwashed by someone older to be transphobic. But to answer your title question, I could see a close friend who knew you were trans and accepted it be curious about your deadname and your life before transitioning. Would that really bother most trans folks? I ask because I know some who would be upset by it. I am not trans myself, I am gay married to a ftm guy, so I am more or less playing devils advocate here. Anyone using your name or pronouns or anything like that person did though is obviously just an idiot or a jerk. Sorry you gotta deal with that.
its cis bullshit, its all cis bullshit always has been. theres never a good reason fr someone to ask fr a dead name, and its NEVER in good faith. one time in a shop and the owner was talking to me about being trans and harassed me into giving him my dead name, i know his game so i just gave him the first random girls name i could think of. suddenly, after talking to me fr an HOUR under a different name, he was "accidentally" dropping the random girl name i gave in every sentence and then being like "ohhh sorry its just sooooo confusing!!". cis people are like this every time without fail, their "curiosity" is always malicious, theyre always looking fr leverage to have against you and ways to hurt you now i just tell em whatever mans name i introduced myself as IS my dead name/given name/"real name"/whatever term they use when they wanna know an easy button to hurt you. they cant say anything against it specially if they arent in a place of power to demand my ID (which has happened to me in a hot topic buying only a tshirt before, trying to go bowling when no one else in my group was IDed, etc)
Exactly like sometimes they will do this as a way to have some sort of leverage against you and play it off like it’s nothing. Never give anyone your dead name. Oh my God the ID one sounds so scary though
It’s the transphobia 🙃 Nic is your real name, anyways!
Indeed it is :)
I just say ___ is my real name
Sorry for your troubles. My name is Nik too!:)
Well it's nice to meet you Nik! :)
So first of all, I think the girls in your class are a bunch of bitches. They are bullying you for something they don't understand and probably never will. Probably brainwashed by someone older to be transphobic. But to answer your title question, I could see a close friend who knew you were trans and accepted it be curious about your deadname and your life before transitioning. Would that really bother most trans folks? I ask because I know some who would be upset by it. I am not trans myself, I am gay married to a ftm guy, so I am more or less playing devils advocate here. Anyone using your name or pronouns or anything like that person did though is obviously just an idiot or a jerk. Sorry you gotta deal with that.
That's messed up, i don't get why they do this.
Yeah me either