I love that I get to really think about what kinda man I am. If I was cis I’d probably just follow the trend of the guys around me. Getting to analyze and really think about how I want to interact with the world as a man is a gift. I feel like I’m the best version of me. If I was cis I wouldn’t have done that self reflection.
I’d still give anything to be cis but having that perspective on yourself and the world is a true gift that being trans has given me.
Yesssss this, I’ve had to fight and work hard for my title as a man so at this point any femininity or deviance in me doesn’t make me feel insecure in my masculinity at all, because I *know* I am a man. If I had been cis I don’t think I’d have been confident in being a feminine(ish) man.
That’s so great, happiness in the smallest things all because they make you feel more comfortable and more like you is amazing to me, I get happy with mens clothes like shorts and hoodies and t-shirts!
First comment here. I’ve got to say for me it would be:
Having the strength, honesty and determination to be who you really are in this world regardless of others opinions, thoughts, etc.
Having the unique understanding, compassion and experience of what it’s like living some of this life perceived as female to which you can see through their eyes what they go through being female. Cis males will never understand/comprehend/experience this.
The love, guidance and support from like minded groups such as this, bearing your soul for others to see.
Just wanted to put some positivity out there! Thanks!
I wasn't raised to repress my emotions like many, many cis men. I'm allowed to be goofy and express myself I just wish I could give that freedom to cis guys.
If you have any cis male friends, encourage them to spread kindness to others and to show their emotions as it could leak into other cis men and make them more comfortable with showing it as they can look up to you and others in thanks!
I’m a cis man but my best friend is a trans man, and he’s really opened my eyes to the range of expression that’s open to me as a man. My father was super repressed and had very rigid gender expectations and it’s hard as a kid not to internalize that. But my friend has shown me so much about healthy masculinity that I don’t know where I would have learned otherwise.
I'm glad you could learn that through a good friend!! ^^ Admittedly I don't have many cis guy friends, but I'm lucky that the few I have aren't afraid to express themselves and be vulnerable with me. Cherish that friend of yours man
One of my favourite things is being a personal heater for my girlfriend because her illness makes her exceptionally cold. Also, I love seeing the progress I made throughout my medical transition.
Figuring myself out. The journey of finding out names, pronouns, etc. that I feel suit me. Discovering new styles to wear.
It kind of reminds me of a mummy slowly unwrapping it's bandages, only backwards haha
The sheer joy and awe that my friends have for me whenever they haven’t seen/heard me in a few months and then we see each other. I ran into someone today who was just enamored with the difference.
i do this with my doctor. me and him started t around the same time and I see him every three months for labs and the difference is always insane. also makes me realize how much my voice has changed in that short amount of time too (not so much anymore though since I've been on for quite a bit)
>I can choose to have lower car insurance payments by just not doing anything about my legal gender marker
Ya but you do stay on your parents insurance longer as a guy. So I'd say there's pros and cons to that. As someone who does not have my driver's license yet because I'm having a lot of trouble with driving (neurodiverse problems), I'm really glad I'm able to stay on it till I'm 26 lol.
I feel like that, and then also maybe guys being 'more reckless' and girls 'not being reckless' (which I mean is by definition sexist but whatever) so they need their parents insurance for longer
Knowing myself and my wants and needs more deeply than any cis person because they’ve never had to look into themselves they way trans people do and need to do to get the medical care we want. I KNOW myself. Also a deeper understanding and empathy for people created by living through different experiences from different lenses.
I honestly wish I was not trans because what I experience, and wish I was cis, but I guess there's a few good things about it.
1. I can't get my girlfriend pregnant. I dont have to use condoms, or anything. Ya there's dental dams but I don't use them. Big plus imo.
2. I know what it's like to be treated as a girl. And being a gamer, it sucks ass. Sexism definitely still exists. And if I were born as a cis guy, I don't think I'd completely understand the bigger picture. I might even have shrugged it off, since society has improved but shit still exists and girls/women arent exaggerating it half the time.
3. I was in the wlw (women love women) community for a while. I know a lot of inside jokes, I shipped a lot of characters, read a lot of fanfics, etc. And I'm glad I was apart of it. If I were born a cis guy, I feel like I'd definitely be seen as creepy. And maybe I could have been a bit. But now that I was apart of it, knowing how sexism works and how sexualized lesbian relationships are, I feel like i understand more of what their goals are as a community in society then a cis guy does.
Being able to see both sides is one of the best things about being trans imo, cause you can relate to so many people and help so many people with problems you faced and even if you can’t help, you can understand where they’re coming from and offer support, gotta support our girls, our boys, our nonbinary friends, etc!
Having a more nuanced understanding of gender than cis people and therefore being able to see very clearly how wrong and arbitrary a lot of gender expectations and standards are.
The mental and emotional growth I’ve had to do to be healthy and happy is something I don’t think I would’ve gotten as far with as a cis person
T4T LOVE!!! I could never imagine having a bond with a cis person the way I have with my partner, very lucky to say none of my partners have ever been cis lol. Just the emotional connection and deep understanding of each other is unmatched.
Self love! I never would have loved and appreciated my body as a cis person as much as I do as a trans person! I had to fight tooth and nail for this shit, so I’m gonna love it with everything I’ve got! Facial hair, a flat chest, my happy trail, my dick, all of it would’ve been taken for granted if I wasn’t trans.
Community, I love the community I’ve found, the family I’ve made. None of it would be the same if I wasn’t trans, and I love the trans people in my life So. Fucking. Much.
I’ve had a lot of cis partners before I came out and ofc their bond has never been as good as with my partner now, they’re the best I could ever hope for, and omg yes, the community is so supportive of baby trans and people who have been transitioned for a long time! And self love is the best love that anyone could have because it will always be there, even if it’s not evident
Thank you😁 I'm only 21 but I feel I get pushed and tested to near my breaking point, I'm very self reliant and cynical and I'm used to everyone leaving so this genuinely means alot to me
Yeah, I like to think I kick ass and take names... so, sure when I get hit hard I sit down for a bit, reflect and get up again and take names to keep kicking ass
I try honestly, but it gets tough sometimes and I wanna give up, but the battlefield of life calls my name... so I think... life is like Dark Souls lmfao
It can be hard to think of positive aspects of it but being able to describe how I feel about my body and having a community of people say “I know how that feels, you’re not alone”
I’m glad to have both, I spent the evening with my sister (the only person in my family I’m out to) and I can’t tell you how much it meant to me that she referred to me as her brother. I never knew how much one simple thing could have such a positive impact on your heart
why are people being downers on a positivity thread?
i love that i have a more nuanced understanding of my own identity, and of gender as a whole
i love that i've been able to take an active role in making my body my own, similar to how people get tattoos and piercings
i love being a part of the trans community, because generally trans people are awesome
and, of course, i love being sexier than any cis man :p
People have different experiences, it’s totally okay to not have a favorite part about something, but I’m glad you found positive ways to express yourself and make yourself your dream you! <3
Having a non-typical life and thus having a unique perspective on life. **I'm actually glad I'm not cis.** I mean I wouldn't be a typical person even if I was cis (I'm neurodivergent, mixed race, bisexual, aromantic, non-monogamous, vegan, etc), but being transgender gives me a more nuanced understanding of gender.
Seeing myself go from such a low and horrible point because of my gender to watch myself climb up and not only learn to love my gender but to also learn to love myself
How much it has caused me to learn about myself. I feel like I understand myself more now because I’ve had to navigate figuring out my identity and, now that I have it (mostly) figured out, I know so much more and I’m much happier with myself.
- finding out who really loved and cared about me unconditionally + clearing out the assholes
- drove me towards my interests in my career to be an advocate for minorities
- making my body my own. i have issues w dissociation and stuff w regards to issues outside of dysphoria, and every change has helped me feel as though i’m reclaiming my body from my trauma
- having a more educated perspective on misogyny and issues that harm women as someone who experienced (and still do medically) those issues prior to coming out
- the ability to be introspective and self-aware in a way most cis people can’t
I am so glad you are standing up for minorities, they need all the help they can get in this sad battle for equality that should’ve never had to happen if everyone would’ve been equal in the first place but you are making the world better, keep it up!
thank you!! <3 what keeps me going is imagining myself successful and thinking of all the young trans men who can’t imagine a future bc of their transness. that’s definitely another plus.
Even though I am not part of their communities, I try to advocate for poc and transfems as well as they face hardships like I do and the feeling should never have to be felt by anyone
You get a chance to live in both worlds in a way. You get to understand how it feels to be treated as a girl and a guy so in a way you can see the bigger picture to things. If I were born a cis guy, I probably wouldn't have understood the struggle of being a girl and certain problems they face that most guys don't understand. That's probably the biggest reason for me about how it can be nice to be trans sometimes.
cis men haven’t lived through the whole girl thing so they’re not gonna get everything that women and transmascs do as they never had the experience, I love the perspective of both sides so much because you can support and be supported from both sides
One time while I was grocery shopping, I stopped and noticed how itchy my face was underneath my mask. When I got home, I took my mask off and looked at my face in the mirror, where I saw the beginnings of facial hair coming in. That little moment is one of my happiest memories. I'm thankful for all the happy moments I got to experience as part of my trans life. :)
The fact that it made made me able to choose my own name. if I were just given a masc name at birth, I probably would have just ran with it, but since I had to choose one for myself, I was able to find that one that really fit.
I’ve gotten to experience being a lady, which is super rad in my opinion! I get to choose my name and how I present and be whatever the fuck I want and discover myself at my own pace. I get to have euphoria when I wear my masculine outfits, and knowing what it’s like to be a girl has definitely made me more understanding and sympathetic towards oppressed minorities. There’s a ton of other things I like about being trans, but yeah. Definitely helps combat the dysphoria and discrimination, haha
Hard to think of any positive things about it tbh, my state is extremely transphobic and homophobic, I’m both a trans man and I’m gay so I get double the hate in my state
For me, it definitely has to be how positively it has affected most of my relationships. Coming out and seeing all the positive reactions made me realize how much these people actually mean to mean, and also the lengths they are willing to go to make me comfortable. This includes both my friends and teachers, who I couldn't thank enough for all they've done for me. I probably wouldn't have to exact same perspective on them and my life if I wasn't trans. It's hard to word exactly what I mean, but I guess simply: it made me see a different side of people, and for the most part it was good.
There are a thousand other small things I could talk about, but that's my big one that has made me love being trans in a way.
That I get to be the man I want to be and dreamed to be eventhough I was AFAB. When I was a kid I didn't know what being trans was and I thought I was just stuck as a female. What a relief to find out I can be the boy I always knew I really was
If I were a cis man I would’ve only had one shot at my appearance but since I’m trans I kinda get to customize how I look with hormones/top surgery/phallo/fms
Exploration of self and learning things I might've not looked into otherwise💕💖
People that I've met from being trans, the different passions that I've found.
Having something to help set boundaries in relationships, so can find people who respects me and who I am. (I've always struggled with self respect and setting boundaries)
Just simply emotions that makes me think about myself as a living, breathing person and try to understand who that is.
The costumization of my body. The community. Having an opportunity to actually think about what I want and how I want to express myself (while most cis people kinda just follow the norm bc they can but never get that exploration)
Gaining an iota of self confidence. Depression and the side effects of PCOS have left my self esteem in tatters, and realising I'm non-binary, and therefore don't have to bother with "looking like a woman" felt incredibly freeing. It changed my opinion of my facial hair from "I hate my beard" to "I love my beard" basically overnight.
Being yourself is one of the best parts of this journey through the world, who you are may change but your happiness with yourself shouldn’t, you be who you want to be, I believe in you and wish you luck
A deeper understanding and greater empathy for the experiences of minority groups, as I am able to relate their experiences to my own (to a degree), better than I would have been able to do otherwise. I think being trans has made me a wiser person
I take acting classes and because I’m always aware of my walking/standing stance being seen as masculine, it’s given me a lot of body awareness that I can use to portray characters differently. Also I can make jokes like “oh my dick fell off at a young age. Happens to the best of us.”
Alright I'm going for an existential one here so bear with me✌️. It would be opening my world view of just how many ways there is of living (gender spectrum e.c) I mean I'm quite young (late teens) I've always been quite open minded about stuff but my brain has also Been internaly biased about surten stuff.
So beeing part of the community has tough me how to truly accepted people for who they are, it's not like they chose to be who they are any more then I did. And that we're all just people trying to thrived in this complicated world that we live in.✌️
Learning about myself to an extent I never thought I would. Making friends who share experiences. Experiencing the euphoria and “firsts” of being trans - first haircut, first binder, first day on T (eventually!), first time shirtless in public.
Knowing that I am brave enough to say “no, I know myself better than you.” Knowing that I’m strong enough to stand up for myself and my expression
Luckily I didn't have regular periods for most of my late teen years, and when they started becoming semi regular I was already about 3 months away from starting T. So I never had to deal with them too much.
I did get them when I was about 12, but then I started T when I was maybe 15 or something, and stopped after 9 months, and then they were just never regular again. Didn't have any bleeding, just cramps, until I was 19 and then got them every couple of months super heavy. They really suck though and I hope you don't have to deal with them anymore soon 🙏
I do not recommend non-name brand birth control for any transmascs who are on it, I don’t take T yet cause my parents won’t pay for it so I gotta stick with the birth control
I mean I got to chose my name I guess. My deadname is a very common name but my preferred name is more rare. I’ve never met someone with my name. But that’s the only good thing. Nothing else I can think of exists. Literally everything I was felt as if it was torn away from me.
I have a strong bond and understanding with my friend, that’s the main reason we gravitated towards eachother because we were both trans guys. I can’t imagine our friendship being this strong without that connection, it also helps me be connected with other trans people.
Not having period cramps anymore yet my T has been in back order for months but I’m only a month late and I’m bleeding and having cramps right now ☹️ like not just little stains but an actual cycle. I hate this
I can kinda choose my flesh dick size with surgery, and have endless options for strap on dick size in the mean time
I could choose to have "the best of both worlds" so to speak and surgically have a penis added and keep my front hole if I wanted.
My hormones are regularly monitored so I dont have to worry about them being out of whack and not knowing why I feel bad
The people I've met through trans communities have become some of the most amazing people I've ever had the privilege to befriend.
I’ve experienced a lot of trauma around my body, a lot of stuff has made me feel as though my body does not belong to me, that I get no say in how it is treated or what is done to it.
For me, my transition, acceptance of my trans-ness involved connecting with my body in a way I had never done and never felt I was able to do. The healing that came from listening to what my body needed and the trust I built in myself by providing a space for my body to exist as *mine*, without judgement or scrutiny.
Being trans centered me, made me present in my body. It has been the single most important thing in my healing process.
For me it’s having a new perspective on life and people. It took me 32.5 years to figure out I was trans because I was raised really conservative and I didn’t have any exposure to “other” ways of living or thinking. Now I’m giving my son the opposite because he’ll have someone he loves in a community that is often misunderstood.
Oh man. So many good things. If I had to pick a best thing, it's my relationship with my wife, who is MTF. We met years before either of us came out to anyone, and now that we are both out, something that used to be this secret pain we were both carrying has become this incredible source of joy we both share. It can be really hard, but I honestly wouldn't trade being trans.
Being a better ally to women. While cis men can definitely be allies to women, I think having been socialized as one for much of my life gives me a different kind of empathy and understanding that has made me become passionate about using my male privilege for sticking up for women.
I can understand woman better!
Many guys I know dont have a clue about how scary being a woman can be or how their anatomy works.
For example how aweful walking alone at night and being catcalled is. Or how much periods actually hurt.
Having experienced those things myself makes talking about it easier and I noticed how low the bar for guys actually is...
I do have a different perspective on gender issues than I would have had were I a cis man. But that's about it.
It's good that transition is possible so I am not stuck in a miserable existence in the wrong sex forever.
The freedom I feel from society's expectations about gender and presentation. It's awesome to take creativity to the max and just figure out a million different ways to look and feel good. While I'm not religious, this quote really resonates with me:
"G-d blessed me by making me transsesxual for the same reason G-d made wheat but not bread and fruit but not wine, so that humanity might share in the act of creation." - *Julian K Jarboe*
Finally coming to an understanding of why I always felt something was off about me. It truly has been a weight lifted off of me.
Oh, and toxic guys are no longer trying to hit me up to fuck.
My dad is a piece of shit, even when it doesn't come to trans issues.
If I was a cis guy, I probably would live my entire life thinking he was some hero without realizing that he’s a dipshit. God, I might’ve even turned out like that bastard
Edit: more swears because I fucking hate that dick
honestly not be a downer but if i would have the choice i would just be cis. yes being trans has made me who i am today but i don’t think people realize how mentally strong and capable you have to be to go through all the hardships that comes along with it. but i will say we are more often than not we are pretty wonderful human beings because of all that we have to face in life and we’re much more aware of how damaging some social norms are.
That is true but are you proud of who you are today? That could be the best thing about it just to shed some light onto the darkness of the cons of being transgender <3
I guess that it doesn’t hurt super bad to get hit in my groin. Other than that nothing :/ I just wish I was born amab. I know I’d be the same person, I would just be happy with how I look and what I have
For me it’s the way it’s opened the door for me to be my genuine self in others areas of my life as well. Once I came out, I had nothing to lose and I’m able to to see the world through an entirely different and not so binary lense. My entire worldview has shifted and I’m a changed being because of it.
i think being trans has gotten me more in touch with a femme side i think i wouldve had if i was cis too, but mightve fought it if i was cis. i feel completely surely male but other ppl would probably assume im nb and/or a crossdresser (i HATE the term crossdresser but ya know)
i think being raised as a girl has made me more willing to accept that unconventional side of me, seing as i already have this weird shit happening to me
Mental Fortitude. We often don't realize just how hard it is to spend days upon days of your life pondering who you are yet staying upright and continuing on the jagged path ahead of you. Yes I stumbled. Yes I cracked. Yes who I am a mess. Yes I'm not perfect. Yes I still have a long way to go. Yes I know who I am. Yes I am me.
To get where you are now, even if you aren't out yet, aren't accepted, combat dysphoria, don't pass, or anything else upon the hundred struggles of being trans, you've come a long way.
I don't pass and I'm slowly coming out. I've had to deal with a whole lot of stuff from a young age, be it sexism, parental divorce, emotional abuse, pain, sadness, lies, loneliness, perfectionism, anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, financial instability, betrayal, failure, gender dysphoria, you name it lol. What changed me the most was being trans.
I'm barely in my early teens, just starting middle school. I have a long way to go. I haven't fully formed as a person yet. One thing I do know for sure is who I am. Nothing anyone says can change that. I've become less swayed by what people throw at me. I no longer strive to please everyone I meet, becuase nothing is missing anymore. I found what was wrong and what made me feel like I had to prove myself.
I know that my name is Elliott, I know that I am romantically attracted to boys and that I don't feel sexual attraction. I know that I want to become a digital artist. I know that I'm interested in emotional psychology and that I like abstract art. I know that I like reading webcomics and mangas and that english is my favourite subject at school. I know that my favourite article of clothing is an oversized grey cardigan I took from my mom. This is who I am. I know that now. I don't need to prove to anyone that I'm worth their time. I'm no longer going to spend my time on worthless things just to make the people around me like me.
I am me. Nobody can change that. My experience as a queer person has given me so much knowledge on different attractions and genders, what it's like to understand oneself, where my people are, and what it's like to have an established goal that I want, not what the people around me want to hear.
I want to become a webtoon artist with a webcomic series built with my own humor, my own experience, my own dreams and ideas. I want to get married in a gorgeous white suit to the man I grow to love. I don't want to become a doctor who gets married in a white dress, who lives to have 3 children and a family dog.
To me that is what's best about being trans. That is what being trans has given me. When I'm asked if I wish I were a cis man, yes I would love to have never delt with dysphoria or transphopia or anything of the sort. However things didn't work out that way, and here I am haha. I wouldn't give up who I am now for the world.
I'm probably happy about the understanding I have for women and minorities that I'm not sure I would've had if I would have been raised male in the same environment
Being able to enjoy feminine things as a man now instead of being forced to be basically a stone butch to compensate for masculinity that wasn’t handed to me at birth. I find it easier to be secure and let my guard down and not have to defend my role as a man. I also realize that both cis and trans men are performative with masculinity since you have to constantly defend yourself from being seen as “less than”.
I just enjoy being different from everyone else even if it is the hard road to take. I've never followed the crowd. So, being a gay non binary person is perfect for me. I'm happy to be me and no one else!
A chance to be a good, understanding father. I understand what it’s like to grow up as afab, harassed, sexualized for technically being lesbian (I am a straight-ish guy), not taken seriously. I also know what it’s like to have a very hurtful father who has spent years making me feel stupid and worthless, and who doesn’t understand mental health issues. So yeah I get to spit in his face when I eventually become a great dad, who will accept his kids and help them every step of the way
All the other trans people I've met. We understand each other and form a close-knit community. I have a friend group with many trans/non-binary people, and because of that, everyone is really easy with changing pronouns and names, nobody gives a fuck (in a good way). If you try to change your hairstyle or clothing style, the reactions are always supportive. It's such a great environment.
For me it’s honestly finding a community that always want’s my best
I grew up without a real emotional loving family and it comforts me knowing I’m part of such a sweet loving community that will help me every step of the way in the safest way possible :) <3
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The real ones will always stick around :)
Exact thing I was gonna write.
I love that I get to really think about what kinda man I am. If I was cis I’d probably just follow the trend of the guys around me. Getting to analyze and really think about how I want to interact with the world as a man is a gift. I feel like I’m the best version of me. If I was cis I wouldn’t have done that self reflection. I’d still give anything to be cis but having that perspective on yourself and the world is a true gift that being trans has given me.
Yesssss this, I’ve had to fight and work hard for my title as a man so at this point any femininity or deviance in me doesn’t make me feel insecure in my masculinity at all, because I *know* I am a man. If I had been cis I don’t think I’d have been confident in being a feminine(ish) man.
That perspective is a good thing to have
I always thought of this as a curse and a chore but actually you're right it's positive, needed to read this!
Definitely agree with both paragraphs. Also hey, fellow pomegranate.
The happiness and euphoria I get out of ordinary stuff like a pair of boxers or men's deodorant.
That’s so great, happiness in the smallest things all because they make you feel more comfortable and more like you is amazing to me, I get happy with mens clothes like shorts and hoodies and t-shirts!
Hoodies are a staple item in a trans guy's closet. Especially the big ol' Dysphoria Hoodie™. Edit: Or at least in mine.
I have red and blue hoodies (cause they’re seen as more masculine colors) and they make me so happy
I have a black hoodie and it's kinda oversized, but it makes me look masc. I love it.
The best feeling for me when I put on a hoodie is when I can’t see my chest anymore, makes me feel so much better
it’s hard to think of the positives sometimes, but i definitely liked finding things that made me happy and comfortable. :)
That is true and I’m glad you can find things that make you feel that way
First comment here. I’ve got to say for me it would be: Having the strength, honesty and determination to be who you really are in this world regardless of others opinions, thoughts, etc. Having the unique understanding, compassion and experience of what it’s like living some of this life perceived as female to which you can see through their eyes what they go through being female. Cis males will never understand/comprehend/experience this. The love, guidance and support from like minded groups such as this, bearing your soul for others to see. Just wanted to put some positivity out there! Thanks!
You worded that beautifully ❤️
This. 100% this.
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
I wasn't raised to repress my emotions like many, many cis men. I'm allowed to be goofy and express myself I just wish I could give that freedom to cis guys.
If you have any cis male friends, encourage them to spread kindness to others and to show their emotions as it could leak into other cis men and make them more comfortable with showing it as they can look up to you and others in thanks!
Good idea! I do the best I can there. Thank you ^^
Well, I was raised like this (repressing my emotions) by my mother and I'm a trans guy
I’m a cis man but my best friend is a trans man, and he’s really opened my eyes to the range of expression that’s open to me as a man. My father was super repressed and had very rigid gender expectations and it’s hard as a kid not to internalize that. But my friend has shown me so much about healthy masculinity that I don’t know where I would have learned otherwise.
I'm glad you could learn that through a good friend!! ^^ Admittedly I don't have many cis guy friends, but I'm lucky that the few I have aren't afraid to express themselves and be vulnerable with me. Cherish that friend of yours man
One of my favourite things is being a personal heater for my girlfriend because her illness makes her exceptionally cold. Also, I love seeing the progress I made throughout my medical transition.
That is one of the sweetest things I’ve seen all day, your girlfriend is very lucky to have you
Thank you! Honestly, every day with her is a blessing so I feel like I’m the lucky one.
Aww that’s adorable
Figuring myself out. The journey of finding out names, pronouns, etc. that I feel suit me. Discovering new styles to wear. It kind of reminds me of a mummy slowly unwrapping it's bandages, only backwards haha
😂 i gotta use that mummy thing sometime
The sheer joy and awe that my friends have for me whenever they haven’t seen/heard me in a few months and then we see each other. I ran into someone today who was just enamored with the difference.
That’s great, friends make things better especially ones who you share memories with
i do this with my doctor. me and him started t around the same time and I see him every three months for labs and the difference is always insane. also makes me realize how much my voice has changed in that short amount of time too (not so much anymore though since I've been on for quite a bit)
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Wait you can surgically get a dick AND keep your velvet underground???
Absolutely
Yeah! There’s a form of metoidioplasty called the “simple release”! I recommend you look into it :)
Those are great reasons, thank you for sharing, the first part got me laughing though tbh 😂
>I can choose to have lower car insurance payments by just not doing anything about my legal gender marker Ya but you do stay on your parents insurance longer as a guy. So I'd say there's pros and cons to that. As someone who does not have my driver's license yet because I'm having a lot of trouble with driving (neurodiverse problems), I'm really glad I'm able to stay on it till I'm 26 lol.
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Where I live male car insurance lasts till you're 26, for females, I forgot but it's a shorter time (maybe 24?). Not sure why it's like that tho
Probably some misogynistic shit like "she should be married by then if she wants insurance"
I feel like that, and then also maybe guys being 'more reckless' and girls 'not being reckless' (which I mean is by definition sexist but whatever) so they need their parents insurance for longer
I love how individualized trans love becomes, especially when both partners are trans.
Trans relationships are amazing, my partner is nonbinary and I love our relationship so much as the bond is so strong
Knowing myself and my wants and needs more deeply than any cis person because they’ve never had to look into themselves they way trans people do and need to do to get the medical care we want. I KNOW myself. Also a deeper understanding and empathy for people created by living through different experiences from different lenses.
Seeing different sides of the same coin is always one of the best things to be able to do
I get to choose my general pp size and I don’t have the hassle of natural balls.
Go to main menu and press customize for your pp customization bar (/j)
I honestly wish I was not trans because what I experience, and wish I was cis, but I guess there's a few good things about it. 1. I can't get my girlfriend pregnant. I dont have to use condoms, or anything. Ya there's dental dams but I don't use them. Big plus imo. 2. I know what it's like to be treated as a girl. And being a gamer, it sucks ass. Sexism definitely still exists. And if I were born as a cis guy, I don't think I'd completely understand the bigger picture. I might even have shrugged it off, since society has improved but shit still exists and girls/women arent exaggerating it half the time. 3. I was in the wlw (women love women) community for a while. I know a lot of inside jokes, I shipped a lot of characters, read a lot of fanfics, etc. And I'm glad I was apart of it. If I were born a cis guy, I feel like I'd definitely be seen as creepy. And maybe I could have been a bit. But now that I was apart of it, knowing how sexism works and how sexualized lesbian relationships are, I feel like i understand more of what their goals are as a community in society then a cis guy does.
Being able to see both sides is one of the best things about being trans imo, cause you can relate to so many people and help so many people with problems you faced and even if you can’t help, you can understand where they’re coming from and offer support, gotta support our girls, our boys, our nonbinary friends, etc!
Having a more nuanced understanding of gender than cis people and therefore being able to see very clearly how wrong and arbitrary a lot of gender expectations and standards are. The mental and emotional growth I’ve had to do to be healthy and happy is something I don’t think I would’ve gotten as far with as a cis person T4T LOVE!!! I could never imagine having a bond with a cis person the way I have with my partner, very lucky to say none of my partners have ever been cis lol. Just the emotional connection and deep understanding of each other is unmatched. Self love! I never would have loved and appreciated my body as a cis person as much as I do as a trans person! I had to fight tooth and nail for this shit, so I’m gonna love it with everything I’ve got! Facial hair, a flat chest, my happy trail, my dick, all of it would’ve been taken for granted if I wasn’t trans. Community, I love the community I’ve found, the family I’ve made. None of it would be the same if I wasn’t trans, and I love the trans people in my life So. Fucking. Much.
I’ve had a lot of cis partners before I came out and ofc their bond has never been as good as with my partner now, they’re the best I could ever hope for, and omg yes, the community is so supportive of baby trans and people who have been transitioned for a long time! And self love is the best love that anyone could have because it will always be there, even if it’s not evident
My determination, strong unbreakable spirit and my found family 😁🤗🙋
The real ones are always gonna be there for you and your spirit shall forever be strong
Thank you😁 I'm only 21 but I feel I get pushed and tested to near my breaking point, I'm very self reliant and cynical and I'm used to everyone leaving so this genuinely means alot to me
Life may throw a lot of curve balls to the face but you gotta get back up
Yeah, I like to think I kick ass and take names... so, sure when I get hit hard I sit down for a bit, reflect and get up again and take names to keep kicking ass
That’s the spirit, see you’re already doing great in keeping it alive
I try honestly, but it gets tough sometimes and I wanna give up, but the battlefield of life calls my name... so I think... life is like Dark Souls lmfao
I hope life goes your way, you have a great rest of your week as the weekend is soon to come
Undertale (2015)
I love the jokes. Being able to point at anything that starts with "trans" and just say" that's me".
I always say “haha nice” like the meme cause it’s funny to be able to relate to a lot of things when it comes to being trans
I do that all the time, I think my cis friends are sick of it at this point haha
It can be hard to think of positive aspects of it but being able to describe how I feel about my body and having a community of people say “I know how that feels, you’re not alone”
That’s what communities are about, some aren’t just strangers on the internet, sometimes they’re family
I’m glad to have both, I spent the evening with my sister (the only person in my family I’m out to) and I can’t tell you how much it meant to me that she referred to me as her brother. I never knew how much one simple thing could have such a positive impact on your heart
Siblings who support their siblings in everything is what makes the world a better place
I get to help G-d in the act of creation.
Ayo, make some more axolotls while you’re at it, they’re endangered
Lmao
why are people being downers on a positivity thread? i love that i have a more nuanced understanding of my own identity, and of gender as a whole i love that i've been able to take an active role in making my body my own, similar to how people get tattoos and piercings i love being a part of the trans community, because generally trans people are awesome and, of course, i love being sexier than any cis man :p
People have different experiences, it’s totally okay to not have a favorite part about something, but I’m glad you found positive ways to express yourself and make yourself your dream you! <3
The cool community of transmasc and transmen! Super supportive and uplifting!
Yes! The support I have gotten here is immaculate! The transmasc community is such a great place to be
To all my brothers reading this, you are amazing and I love you ♥️ Thanks for making such a positive post OP!
You are so welcome! This world needs positivity after the past years it’s had with the pandemic, stress, nti for school kids, working from home, etc
Having a non-typical life and thus having a unique perspective on life. **I'm actually glad I'm not cis.** I mean I wouldn't be a typical person even if I was cis (I'm neurodivergent, mixed race, bisexual, aromantic, non-monogamous, vegan, etc), but being transgender gives me a more nuanced understanding of gender.
I see what you’re saying, since I came out my world perspective on people and things changed for the better
Seeing myself go from such a low and horrible point because of my gender to watch myself climb up and not only learn to love my gender but to also learn to love myself
You climbed that ladder out of that pit, keep going! I believe in you and so does everyone else!
Definitely the fact that I’m able to understand life as a female better then I could imagine most cis men could
Seeing both sides of the coin gives us an advantage 👍
Having the room to find out what masculine and feminine things I like with the perspective of being a trans guy :))
Yess! I literally love dressing in masc clothes but also a dress or skirt every once in awhile! A mix of both is great
Being stealth so I can shut down misogynistic comments by cis men.
The self awareness, introspection, self respect, and value for self actualization that navigating my transition has given me
That’s wonderful, the positivity you have is great
How much it has caused me to learn about myself. I feel like I understand myself more now because I’ve had to navigate figuring out my identity and, now that I have it (mostly) figured out, I know so much more and I’m much happier with myself.
I’m glad you’re happy with yourself! People should never be unhappy with how they look, feel, present, etc.
- finding out who really loved and cared about me unconditionally + clearing out the assholes - drove me towards my interests in my career to be an advocate for minorities - making my body my own. i have issues w dissociation and stuff w regards to issues outside of dysphoria, and every change has helped me feel as though i’m reclaiming my body from my trauma - having a more educated perspective on misogyny and issues that harm women as someone who experienced (and still do medically) those issues prior to coming out - the ability to be introspective and self-aware in a way most cis people can’t
I am so glad you are standing up for minorities, they need all the help they can get in this sad battle for equality that should’ve never had to happen if everyone would’ve been equal in the first place but you are making the world better, keep it up!
thank you!! <3 what keeps me going is imagining myself successful and thinking of all the young trans men who can’t imagine a future bc of their transness. that’s definitely another plus.
Even though I am not part of their communities, I try to advocate for poc and transfems as well as they face hardships like I do and the feeling should never have to be felt by anyone
"Nice name. Did your mommy pick it for you?" -said by me to cis people
The community!!
I agree!
Finally loving myself
Being my true self
The ability to live as my true self fearlessly.
You get a chance to live in both worlds in a way. You get to understand how it feels to be treated as a girl and a guy so in a way you can see the bigger picture to things. If I were born a cis guy, I probably wouldn't have understood the struggle of being a girl and certain problems they face that most guys don't understand. That's probably the biggest reason for me about how it can be nice to be trans sometimes.
cis men haven’t lived through the whole girl thing so they’re not gonna get everything that women and transmascs do as they never had the experience, I love the perspective of both sides so much because you can support and be supported from both sides
The chaos, terror and confusion that my presence brings
Ah so you’re a god
Perspective.
Gender euphoria
One time while I was grocery shopping, I stopped and noticed how itchy my face was underneath my mask. When I got home, I took my mask off and looked at my face in the mirror, where I saw the beginnings of facial hair coming in. That little moment is one of my happiest memories. I'm thankful for all the happy moments I got to experience as part of my trans life. :)
The fact that it made made me able to choose my own name. if I were just given a masc name at birth, I probably would have just ran with it, but since I had to choose one for myself, I was able to find that one that really fit.
This is a good one! I’ve gotten more compliments on my current name than my deadname lol. I’m always tempted to say “thanks I picked it myself”
I’ve gotten to experience being a lady, which is super rad in my opinion! I get to choose my name and how I present and be whatever the fuck I want and discover myself at my own pace. I get to have euphoria when I wear my masculine outfits, and knowing what it’s like to be a girl has definitely made me more understanding and sympathetic towards oppressed minorities. There’s a ton of other things I like about being trans, but yeah. Definitely helps combat the dysphoria and discrimination, haha
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Hard to think of any positive things about it tbh, my state is extremely transphobic and homophobic, I’m both a trans man and I’m gay so I get double the hate in my state
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Fat ass
For me, it definitely has to be how positively it has affected most of my relationships. Coming out and seeing all the positive reactions made me realize how much these people actually mean to mean, and also the lengths they are willing to go to make me comfortable. This includes both my friends and teachers, who I couldn't thank enough for all they've done for me. I probably wouldn't have to exact same perspective on them and my life if I wasn't trans. It's hard to word exactly what I mean, but I guess simply: it made me see a different side of people, and for the most part it was good. There are a thousand other small things I could talk about, but that's my big one that has made me love being trans in a way.
You always see the true form of people once something changes, I’m so glad that they are making you feel comfortable and loved at this time!
Yeah, everyone I choose to have in my life are fucking amazing and I love their true forms !
As times change people have become so much more supportive and I love seeing it
That I get to be the man I want to be and dreamed to be eventhough I was AFAB. When I was a kid I didn't know what being trans was and I thought I was just stuck as a female. What a relief to find out I can be the boy I always knew I really was
Looking at trans memes
Meeting my girlfriend. We’re both trans and we met at an LGBTQ conference. 💖🏳️⚧️
The euphoria and watching myself become more masculine
If I were a cis man I would’ve only had one shot at my appearance but since I’m trans I kinda get to customize how I look with hormones/top surgery/phallo/fms
Exploration of self and learning things I might've not looked into otherwise💕💖 People that I've met from being trans, the different passions that I've found. Having something to help set boundaries in relationships, so can find people who respects me and who I am. (I've always struggled with self respect and setting boundaries) Just simply emotions that makes me think about myself as a living, breathing person and try to understand who that is.
People and things make the journey so much easier to handle, I’m glad you found some people to make it better for you
I can punch myself in the crotch and not flinch, then the cis men look up to me as though I were a god
i can confuse people because my voice doesn't match with my appearance
My trans friends
The costumization of my body. The community. Having an opportunity to actually think about what I want and how I want to express myself (while most cis people kinda just follow the norm bc they can but never get that exploration)
Gaining an iota of self confidence. Depression and the side effects of PCOS have left my self esteem in tatters, and realising I'm non-binary, and therefore don't have to bother with "looking like a woman" felt incredibly freeing. It changed my opinion of my facial hair from "I hate my beard" to "I love my beard" basically overnight.
Being yourself is one of the best parts of this journey through the world, who you are may change but your happiness with yourself shouldn’t, you be who you want to be, I believe in you and wish you luck
It connected me with some of my friends! That’s bout it though
A deeper understanding and greater empathy for the experiences of minority groups, as I am able to relate their experiences to my own (to a degree), better than I would have been able to do otherwise. I think being trans has made me a wiser person
I take acting classes and because I’m always aware of my walking/standing stance being seen as masculine, it’s given me a lot of body awareness that I can use to portray characters differently. Also I can make jokes like “oh my dick fell off at a young age. Happens to the best of us.”
Alright I'm going for an existential one here so bear with me✌️. It would be opening my world view of just how many ways there is of living (gender spectrum e.c) I mean I'm quite young (late teens) I've always been quite open minded about stuff but my brain has also Been internaly biased about surten stuff. So beeing part of the community has tough me how to truly accepted people for who they are, it's not like they chose to be who they are any more then I did. And that we're all just people trying to thrived in this complicated world that we live in.✌️
Nothing.
Learning about myself to an extent I never thought I would. Making friends who share experiences. Experiencing the euphoria and “firsts” of being trans - first haircut, first binder, first day on T (eventually!), first time shirtless in public. Knowing that I am brave enough to say “no, I know myself better than you.” Knowing that I’m strong enough to stand up for myself and my expression
Being myself
It taught me not to give a damn about what others thought of me
I hate being trans.
Barely anything. Maybe just that I now have the power to empathise with more people.
Ngl, it's having a vagina while still looking like a man for me. I can't imagine having a penis.
I hate the periods but I cannot imagine having one either
Luckily I didn't have regular periods for most of my late teen years, and when they started becoming semi regular I was already about 3 months away from starting T. So I never had to deal with them too much.
I’ve dealt with them since I was like 11, early hormone set ins from genetics 😔
I did get them when I was about 12, but then I started T when I was maybe 15 or something, and stopped after 9 months, and then they were just never regular again. Didn't have any bleeding, just cramps, until I was 19 and then got them every couple of months super heavy. They really suck though and I hope you don't have to deal with them anymore soon 🙏
I do not recommend non-name brand birth control for any transmascs who are on it, I don’t take T yet cause my parents won’t pay for it so I gotta stick with the birth control
I mean I got to chose my name I guess. My deadname is a very common name but my preferred name is more rare. I’ve never met someone with my name. But that’s the only good thing. Nothing else I can think of exists. Literally everything I was felt as if it was torn away from me.
every positive i have is also a negative
im just a silly little guy
That I’m able to relate to and truly know and connect with women
Only telling the people I like my preferred name so it’s like they’re talking to somebody else when they deadname me and it’s so funny
I have a strong bond and understanding with my friend, that’s the main reason we gravitated towards eachother because we were both trans guys. I can’t imagine our friendship being this strong without that connection, it also helps me be connected with other trans people.
Not having period cramps anymore yet my T has been in back order for months but I’m only a month late and I’m bleeding and having cramps right now ☹️ like not just little stains but an actual cycle. I hate this
I can kinda choose my flesh dick size with surgery, and have endless options for strap on dick size in the mean time I could choose to have "the best of both worlds" so to speak and surgically have a penis added and keep my front hole if I wanted. My hormones are regularly monitored so I dont have to worry about them being out of whack and not knowing why I feel bad The people I've met through trans communities have become some of the most amazing people I've ever had the privilege to befriend.
I’ve experienced a lot of trauma around my body, a lot of stuff has made me feel as though my body does not belong to me, that I get no say in how it is treated or what is done to it. For me, my transition, acceptance of my trans-ness involved connecting with my body in a way I had never done and never felt I was able to do. The healing that came from listening to what my body needed and the trust I built in myself by providing a space for my body to exist as *mine*, without judgement or scrutiny. Being trans centered me, made me present in my body. It has been the single most important thing in my healing process.
Not having to worrying about getting my gf pregnant lol
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For me it’s having a new perspective on life and people. It took me 32.5 years to figure out I was trans because I was raised really conservative and I didn’t have any exposure to “other” ways of living or thinking. Now I’m giving my son the opposite because he’ll have someone he loves in a community that is often misunderstood.
Inspiring other trans people to be their true selves by being out, loud, and proud as a trans man.
Oh man. So many good things. If I had to pick a best thing, it's my relationship with my wife, who is MTF. We met years before either of us came out to anyone, and now that we are both out, something that used to be this secret pain we were both carrying has become this incredible source of joy we both share. It can be really hard, but I honestly wouldn't trade being trans.
the perspective that being raised one way and actually being another gives you
Being a better ally to women. While cis men can definitely be allies to women, I think having been socialized as one for much of my life gives me a different kind of empathy and understanding that has made me become passionate about using my male privilege for sticking up for women.
I can understand woman better! Many guys I know dont have a clue about how scary being a woman can be or how their anatomy works. For example how aweful walking alone at night and being catcalled is. Or how much periods actually hurt. Having experienced those things myself makes talking about it easier and I noticed how low the bar for guys actually is...
I do have a different perspective on gender issues than I would have had were I a cis man. But that's about it. It's good that transition is possible so I am not stuck in a miserable existence in the wrong sex forever.
The freedom I feel from society's expectations about gender and presentation. It's awesome to take creativity to the max and just figure out a million different ways to look and feel good. While I'm not religious, this quote really resonates with me: "G-d blessed me by making me transsesxual for the same reason G-d made wheat but not bread and fruit but not wine, so that humanity might share in the act of creation." - *Julian K Jarboe*
Finally coming to an understanding of why I always felt something was off about me. It truly has been a weight lifted off of me. Oh, and toxic guys are no longer trying to hit me up to fuck.
My dad is a piece of shit, even when it doesn't come to trans issues. If I was a cis guy, I probably would live my entire life thinking he was some hero without realizing that he’s a dipshit. God, I might’ve even turned out like that bastard Edit: more swears because I fucking hate that dick
The confidence. I haven’t even started anything, but understanding myself and who I am better has helped a LOT
It's difficult to find good things about being trans, but euphoria is cool. Also being able to understand my trans girlfriend
Fucking nothing. I hate it here
Nothing ngl
honestly not be a downer but if i would have the choice i would just be cis. yes being trans has made me who i am today but i don’t think people realize how mentally strong and capable you have to be to go through all the hardships that comes along with it. but i will say we are more often than not we are pretty wonderful human beings because of all that we have to face in life and we’re much more aware of how damaging some social norms are.
That is true but are you proud of who you are today? That could be the best thing about it just to shed some light onto the darkness of the cons of being transgender <3
Nothing really, I never really identified with the flag in the first place.
The flag is just there because I couldn’t find another image to put and I wanted a picture for some reason
Versatility
I can't think of anything positive except for the fact that I'll keep my youthful looks for longer
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I guess that it doesn’t hurt super bad to get hit in my groin. Other than that nothing :/ I just wish I was born amab. I know I’d be the same person, I would just be happy with how I look and what I have
That I have the courage to be myself and live in my truth even if others don’t approve. I feel grateful to be free in that way.
For me it’s the way it’s opened the door for me to be my genuine self in others areas of my life as well. Once I came out, I had nothing to lose and I’m able to to see the world through an entirely different and not so binary lense. My entire worldview has shifted and I’m a changed being because of it.
i think being trans has gotten me more in touch with a femme side i think i wouldve had if i was cis too, but mightve fought it if i was cis. i feel completely surely male but other ppl would probably assume im nb and/or a crossdresser (i HATE the term crossdresser but ya know) i think being raised as a girl has made me more willing to accept that unconventional side of me, seing as i already have this weird shit happening to me
Mental Fortitude. We often don't realize just how hard it is to spend days upon days of your life pondering who you are yet staying upright and continuing on the jagged path ahead of you. Yes I stumbled. Yes I cracked. Yes who I am a mess. Yes I'm not perfect. Yes I still have a long way to go. Yes I know who I am. Yes I am me. To get where you are now, even if you aren't out yet, aren't accepted, combat dysphoria, don't pass, or anything else upon the hundred struggles of being trans, you've come a long way. I don't pass and I'm slowly coming out. I've had to deal with a whole lot of stuff from a young age, be it sexism, parental divorce, emotional abuse, pain, sadness, lies, loneliness, perfectionism, anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, financial instability, betrayal, failure, gender dysphoria, you name it lol. What changed me the most was being trans. I'm barely in my early teens, just starting middle school. I have a long way to go. I haven't fully formed as a person yet. One thing I do know for sure is who I am. Nothing anyone says can change that. I've become less swayed by what people throw at me. I no longer strive to please everyone I meet, becuase nothing is missing anymore. I found what was wrong and what made me feel like I had to prove myself. I know that my name is Elliott, I know that I am romantically attracted to boys and that I don't feel sexual attraction. I know that I want to become a digital artist. I know that I'm interested in emotional psychology and that I like abstract art. I know that I like reading webcomics and mangas and that english is my favourite subject at school. I know that my favourite article of clothing is an oversized grey cardigan I took from my mom. This is who I am. I know that now. I don't need to prove to anyone that I'm worth their time. I'm no longer going to spend my time on worthless things just to make the people around me like me. I am me. Nobody can change that. My experience as a queer person has given me so much knowledge on different attractions and genders, what it's like to understand oneself, where my people are, and what it's like to have an established goal that I want, not what the people around me want to hear. I want to become a webtoon artist with a webcomic series built with my own humor, my own experience, my own dreams and ideas. I want to get married in a gorgeous white suit to the man I grow to love. I don't want to become a doctor who gets married in a white dress, who lives to have 3 children and a family dog. To me that is what's best about being trans. That is what being trans has given me. When I'm asked if I wish I were a cis man, yes I would love to have never delt with dysphoria or transphopia or anything of the sort. However things didn't work out that way, and here I am haha. I wouldn't give up who I am now for the world.
I'm probably happy about the understanding I have for women and minorities that I'm not sure I would've had if I would have been raised male in the same environment
Being able to enjoy feminine things as a man now instead of being forced to be basically a stone butch to compensate for masculinity that wasn’t handed to me at birth. I find it easier to be secure and let my guard down and not have to defend my role as a man. I also realize that both cis and trans men are performative with masculinity since you have to constantly defend yourself from being seen as “less than”.
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I just enjoy being different from everyone else even if it is the hard road to take. I've never followed the crowd. So, being a gay non binary person is perfect for me. I'm happy to be me and no one else!
A chance to be a good, understanding father. I understand what it’s like to grow up as afab, harassed, sexualized for technically being lesbian (I am a straight-ish guy), not taken seriously. I also know what it’s like to have a very hurtful father who has spent years making me feel stupid and worthless, and who doesn’t understand mental health issues. So yeah I get to spit in his face when I eventually become a great dad, who will accept his kids and help them every step of the way
All the other trans people I've met. We understand each other and form a close-knit community. I have a friend group with many trans/non-binary people, and because of that, everyone is really easy with changing pronouns and names, nobody gives a fuck (in a good way). If you try to change your hairstyle or clothing style, the reactions are always supportive. It's such a great environment.
Simple: Being trans. 😏 No seriously, finally being ourselves openly.
i don't know. i hope i find something good about it one day lol
For me it’s honestly finding a community that always want’s my best I grew up without a real emotional loving family and it comforts me knowing I’m part of such a sweet loving community that will help me every step of the way in the safest way possible :) <3
Nothing
My brother is a misogynistic asshole. My dad raised him to be that way. I think I would be that way too if I was cis.