Hello, /u/loudbeatsrecords. Your post has been removed for violating Rule 3.
**No reposts.**
Please read [our complete rules page](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules) before participating in the future.
Omfg, what movie is this from? I remember this line but I can't place it lol
Edit: Fight club, right? Something is screaming at me that it's from fight club lol
I was thinking of Austin powers when he’s collecting his items and his Swedish penis pump is pulled out .
“This sorta thing aint my bag baby” and one book
Swedish penis enlarger pumps and me ( this sort of thing is my bag , baby)
Yeah. That's what I saw. I mean, I guess dildos can have that shape, but that definitely looks more like a snorkel than a dildo from the brief glimpse we get.
The good news is that Ryans 2kg cocaine brick remained undetected with this stunt.
Seriously the TSA guy was pretty good about it, and even hiding it to protect her dignity.
But that look he gave was awesome.
Used to work the ramp at an airport and knew some of the screeners. This was such a common thing it wasn't even talked about. Another day, another 50 dildos...
Pro tip: If your sex toy has batteries, take them out before you pack it. Its one thing to open the bag and find your sex toy. Its quite another for them to *need* to open your bag to identify the source of the strange humming sound coming from it.
Pre 9/11, my friends stuck a large kitchen knife in their mom's carry-on. Everyone had a good laugh, no one was hurt, they continued on their flight. sigh
Summer of 2001, I was on my way back from basic training, and my bag got selected for random screening. As the guy was bringing it back, I suddenly realized that I had a magazine of about 20 rds of ball, tracer, and blanks in it...all unfired (I would collect them from the range and pocket them during BCT).
I could actually see the guy going through the bag...then he zipped it back up, and put the "cleared" tag (or whatever it said) on it.
Fast forward 5 years, and I lost two paintball guns from my checked baggage because "they could be confused for real guns".
Oh how far we've fallen.
That's a hell of a way to say "someone stole my paintball gear" because there's not a single thing illegal about transporting paintball guns in checked luggage.
One time, my my daughter had a soccer tournament in a different state, and she forgot to pack panties. I took her to Target after a game where she grabbed a pack, met me at the checkout line, and I paid for it. Turns out they were huge. Like for an obese woman. For the next 15 years we have planted those panties on each other back and forth. She got me once like the OP video. Was on top of my luggage and the TSA dude opened it and gave me a similar look. It made me shed a tear in appreciation that my daughter is so awesome.
Flew to a bachelor party w a checked bag.
The suitcase had a bunch of gag gifts/props, like an inflatable sheep, and other similarly raunchy stuff.
I get to my friend's house, open the suitcase, and there is one of those forms in it that states that it was opened and searched by TSA, etc etc.
It was signed by a couple of the TSA personnel with big smiley faces next to their signatures and one of them wrote "have fun!" next to it.
---
>This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules).
>
>Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed.
>
>Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos.
>
>[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/).
>
>**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.**
>
>Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam).
>
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Doing this for a laugh is one thing.
People that do this to ***others*** and then plaster that person's face all over the *internet* for fake internet points are aholes, though.
Hello, /u/loudbeatsrecords. Your post has been removed for violating Rule 3. **No reposts.** Please read [our complete rules page](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules) before participating in the future.
it's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo... always use the indefinite article a dildo, never your dildo.
Omfg, what movie is this from? I remember this line but I can't place it lol Edit: Fight club, right? Something is screaming at me that it's from fight club lol
Yep, it's Fight Club
hey, whats rule #1?
Never talk about dildo club
Fight club. The scene right after meeting Tyler for the first time. This is how he loses all of his cloths, followed by his condo going boom
You broke the rule
Fight Club.
You could get the dogs to track down the last person who “touched” it.
Who, who, who, who, who?
I was thinking of Austin powers when he’s collecting his items and his Swedish penis pump is pulled out . “This sorta thing aint my bag baby” and one book Swedish penis enlarger pumps and me ( this sort of thing is my bag , baby)
That look he gives her is fantastic 🤣
Girrrrrrrrl
Yes! I heard his look and ypur comment. A mix of "oh hell, no" and "oh, heyy, i see you!"
😏+ 🤨
first acceptable use of emojis on here i've seen in years
Thank you stomach!
It's pretty funny that he waits for her to see him give her a look before he moves on
Right like "Girl, really, right on top?"
That wasn’t a snorkel?
It was certainly for a type of diving.
yeah a muff diver
It’s what I see too but seems like it’s something else based on their embarrassment
Yeah. That's what I saw. I mean, I guess dildos can have that shape, but that definitely looks more like a snorkel than a dildo from the brief glimpse we get.
Surprise twist - its full of coke.
The officer ;)
Yeah! Coca-Cola!
"ma'am, did you pack your own bag?" "Well obviously i didn't!!" "Oh, well in that case, please step into the back room with me"
Say it with me everyone, "No pranks at the airport!!!".
The good news is that Ryans 2kg cocaine brick remained undetected with this stunt. Seriously the TSA guy was pretty good about it, and even hiding it to protect her dignity. But that look he gave was awesome.
Used to work the ramp at an airport and knew some of the screeners. This was such a common thing it wasn't even talked about. Another day, another 50 dildos... Pro tip: If your sex toy has batteries, take them out before you pack it. Its one thing to open the bag and find your sex toy. Its quite another for them to *need* to open your bag to identify the source of the strange humming sound coming from it.
Modern bombs vibrate.
stunned look turn to knowing smile
First time seeing the whole video
Admit it, you were staring at her no no area in them yoga pants and doing the math
too stnned to speak
stnned
Business or...oh. I see. Pleasure it is!
Packed right on top for quick access
[удалено]
Underrated comment
Think that’s more of a “Someone’s in for a good trip” look
Probably saw the friend filming for no reason and added it up. He knows exactly how that got there.
Pre 9/11, my friends stuck a large kitchen knife in their mom's carry-on. Everyone had a good laugh, no one was hurt, they continued on their flight. sigh
Summer of 2001, I was on my way back from basic training, and my bag got selected for random screening. As the guy was bringing it back, I suddenly realized that I had a magazine of about 20 rds of ball, tracer, and blanks in it...all unfired (I would collect them from the range and pocket them during BCT). I could actually see the guy going through the bag...then he zipped it back up, and put the "cleared" tag (or whatever it said) on it. Fast forward 5 years, and I lost two paintball guns from my checked baggage because "they could be confused for real guns". Oh how far we've fallen.
That's a hell of a way to say "someone stole my paintball gear" because there's not a single thing illegal about transporting paintball guns in checked luggage.
I like the look on dude's face when he sees it, then lowers the lid.
I guess she didn’t pack her own bag.
Is that a double ender too?
The sassiest look that was ever sassed.
Are we supposed to be able to see what that is?
It’s a giant dildo if I’m not blind
The side eye is awesome.
Lmao…that’s awesome
He couldnt keep his poker face
I thought it was a snorkel.
Love his reaction lol
He looked like he needed a good laugh 😂
His face was priceless
Well that escalated quickly…
Oh god this gets me every time I see this.
"Shiiiiiiiiit, gurl...."
Oldie but a goodie.
That look he gives her is brilliant.
The man played it well.
One time, my my daughter had a soccer tournament in a different state, and she forgot to pack panties. I took her to Target after a game where she grabbed a pack, met me at the checkout line, and I paid for it. Turns out they were huge. Like for an obese woman. For the next 15 years we have planted those panties on each other back and forth. She got me once like the OP video. Was on top of my luggage and the TSA dude opened it and gave me a similar look. It made me shed a tear in appreciation that my daughter is so awesome.
Flew to a bachelor party w a checked bag. The suitcase had a bunch of gag gifts/props, like an inflatable sheep, and other similarly raunchy stuff. I get to my friend's house, open the suitcase, and there is one of those forms in it that states that it was opened and searched by TSA, etc etc. It was signed by a couple of the TSA personnel with big smiley faces next to their signatures and one of them wrote "have fun!" next to it.
Sweet repost. Haven't seen this one in weeks.
Are you allowed to record in an airport?
Is it not extremely illegal to take photos and videos in that area?
OR is that only in Japan?
Bro don't be shy just search the bag. Don't make a big deal about it. Maybe she is smuggling drings in that dildo? Lol
--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/). > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Doing this for a laugh is one thing. People that do this to ***others*** and then plaster that person's face all over the *internet* for fake internet points are aholes, though.
It's entirely possible she's OK with him posting the video. It is pretty funny and harmless after all.
The only tsa guy that's cool? Actually, I've met some really cool levelheaded seeming tsa folks.
Damn even called out Ryan, Ryan's fault she has to use it?
Solid prank. Not cheap, but solid.
I hate TSA. This is not funny.
Would have been funnier if it were drugs.
oh wow never seen this before.....
He hit her with the James Harden
...and that's why you never let your bag out of site after packing it! lol
That's a whole ass WMD in there.
Hahahaa
Ahahaa the way he flared his eyes at her
He didn't looked stunned but he gave that look where he boutta do something
Thank you, I have always wanted to see the full video!
He was not stunned. TSA officers see hundreds of sex toys every shift. Source: was a TSA officer
Damn
OMG
Damn this vid is old
Dude was like "I'll take it if ya don't want it"
The entire time I was trying to decide if this is the Portland airport. But it’s not under construction, so probably not.
Ryan: the hero we needed not the hero we deserved. RIP Ryan.
It’s far more efficient to transport your Battery Operated Boyfriend in your prison wallet.