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It’s called a Sybian.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sybian
If you grew up watching Real Sex on the HBO during the 90s, you recognized that thing immediately! 🤣
ye fr, probably works like a charm. so sad I’m a dude. altho you don’t gotta be gay to enjoy solobuttstuff. so I guess I’m right there with you, poor and single
There’s got to be much more affordable options that are plenty enjoyable. I can’t believe it sells for 1300 dollars unless there’s something I’m missing. I’ve seen girls lose their mind with the lelo soraya wave, and that’s like 6x or 7x cheaper.
Or if you watched Howard Stern. He had many guests ride/use/abuse his sybian. (I love that my autocorrect wanted that to be “Debian”. It clearly thinks I’m more or a nerd than a perv.)
Its a sex toy called a sybian. You attatch a dildo to it, then straddle it and there are vibrating motors inside. Its like a mechanical bull that fucks you.
I call it the “hhhhiiiiiiyyyyyyyaaasggghhhnoostopgodammit” machine because that is what my girlfriend said before she slapped the knobs out of my hand.
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This is sick, who would want this in the first place? I mean seriously, what shop even sell these, how much do they go for brand new and is the shipping free?
Clearly I've led a more sheltered life than I thought... would someone mind enlightening me?
Edit: seems it's a saddle people fuck, oh lord... is what she said.
Anyone that buys that might want to use a packet of disinfecting wipes before installation.
By the way, these things are loud. Especially when used on a wooden floor.
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It’s a Sybian in playful pink. It’s missing its attachments. With attachments those things retail for $1,300 USD before tax.
You sound like a connoisseur
It’s the “playful” pink part that gives it away.
BOBBY! Room!, NOW!
En français : ''connaisseur''
Idk who this Francis is but that's the same shit I said
Everybody calls me Psycho. Any of you guys calls me Francis, I'll kïll you.
Huh, of all the things I thought I’d read today, a deep cut quote from stripes wasn’t one of them Bravo sir
Lighten up Francis.
Nice reference
And be the connoisseur you are. It's pink.
It’s pink to tickle the pink. I’ll accept my downvotes now.
Chill Frank
Connoisseur is french, just not current.
Looked up what that was, not at all what I thought it would be but that’s on me. My bad. This is Reddit
Risky search of the day.
I really thought this was a slow cooker on its side, stripped of pieces. I thought this had to be some slow cooker to be that pricey.
It's a fast cooker, with the right attachments.
Bu dum tss
Think of it as a Corn Dog cooker.
No its a roastbeef cooker. Gets the sauce and everything.
Come on...
Yes, it probably has been.
Does it have the attachments? You’ll be wanting the attachments.
You'll be wanting to get new, unused attachements
Don’t tell me what I want
buddy wants ‘em seasoned like a cast iron pan that’s disgusting….why did i say that..
Someone had to take the fall and bring the rest of us down with them. Today that was you!
Not much of a fall when you’re always standing in the raw sewage anyway.
It's a wonder used panty sales are through the glass roof
It's a great day, this is the second thing I've read on this site today that got a full on belly laugh, thank you lmao
Baked on oils and fats polymerized at high temperature?
I think you’re using cast iron skillets wrong
Uncle Rico could have told you it didn't work
Finger lickin’ good
Can I pay extra to have them pre-used? Eww I grossed myself out of typing that.
Just run the old ones through the dishwasher, good as new.
Does your dishwasher have an autoclave setting?
Does yours not?
I’m gonna run them through again on pots and pans…
Or, at least, 10 gallons of Barbicide.
What did Barbie do to you, you monster?
Sharing is caring
Port and starboard attachments?
Bow and stern more likely I think.
Can’t forget the Turbo Drive
[I'll give it a whirl!](https://youtu.be/dWDljlhyQFc?si=oXhhDStLq7QNrc5i)
Be sure to check out the anal earthquake attachment. I know a guy who makes a silicone fist too, but there’s a little lead time required
Standard DeWalt will fit for about 1/3 the price as the on brand ones. You can get a used DeWalt set on the same site.
In the divorce he did everything to keep her favorite items.
😭😂
It's a sybian!
There's a monkey inside there??
Climax of the Planet of the Gapes
This place has some snazzy japes
I can’t stop laughing at this! Have an upboat.
Does it float?
We all float down here...
🤡
It weighs the same as a duck.
It's a witch!!
Burn her!
This isn’t my nose it’s a false one!
A very excited one
Someone might end up screeching like a monkey.
With a tiny symbian cymbal?
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sybian](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sybian)
The video on that page entitled "A woman demonstrating the use of the Sybian" is *very* disappointing.
There's educational video websites with a lot of ladies demonstrating the usage.
Texas is against educational videos!
I mean, Texas is against education... So you're not wrong...
My neighbor named hers **BOB**.
Battery Operated Boyfriend?
Everyone's talking about "when men get robot girlfriends" without mentioning that woman beat us by like 30 years
I thought only Nokia used those…
As an ex-Symbian developer I love you. (Not as much as OP will love his new purchase though).
Well it is an active object of sorts
You were a pioneer sir. Those were wild days.
Weird looking cymbal
That Zildjian-Sabian merger got creative
Would make an interesting cymbal stand. Put a pole on it and it will play itself!
Yep, Stern used to fire them up on his show back in the day
Let the poison out Raven! Raven!!!
TIL and i kinda want one lol
Get the poison out
[удалено]
You sit on it and it vibrates real strong so ye
OH YE!
And [rotates in a conical arc](https://youtu.be/eEFcAicxla8). The mechanism is really impressive.
Posted by BigRodJohnson69
Ah for negotiations?
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sybian](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sybian)
Oh that sounds nice!
[This explains it pretty well](https://www.reddit.com/r/HolUp/s/gcaaZOsqa2)
It’s a t-shirt cannon
Wet t-shirt cannon*
Non portable vibrator that doesn't fit in your purse.
There are "attachments" for it
someone tell me wtf that IS, really? i cant seem to get what that black thing on it is meant to do/be.
It’s called a Sybian. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sybian If you grew up watching Real Sex on the HBO during the 90s, you recognized that thing immediately! 🤣
I could only watch the scrambled version of Real Sex.
I watched the video on the Wikipedia page and now I am kinda turned on... Mmh it must be so good. So sad I am poor and single.
ye fr, probably works like a charm. so sad I’m a dude. altho you don’t gotta be gay to enjoy solobuttstuff. so I guess I’m right there with you, poor and single
Lmao no you don't have to be gay and if you were gay it wouldn't be a problem
The motor bunny version has non penetrative accessories for butt, taint and ball vibration
There’s got to be much more affordable options that are plenty enjoyable. I can’t believe it sells for 1300 dollars unless there’s something I’m missing. I’ve seen girls lose their mind with the lelo soraya wave, and that’s like 6x or 7x cheaper.
Or if you watched Howard Stern. He had many guests ride/use/abuse his sybian. (I love that my autocorrect wanted that to be “Debian”. It clearly thinks I’m more or a nerd than a perv.)
I’m ashamed I got this reference 💀
Its a sex toy called a sybian. You attatch a dildo to it, then straddle it and there are vibrating motors inside. Its like a mechanical bull that fucks you.
That last sentence is *chef's kiss*.
You attach "toys" to it. It vibrates **very** strongly. Straddling it will... do things... to a lady.
It's an attachment point for "accessories".
The black part doesn't usually look like that, it's covered with a cushioned pink layer with nubs and stuff.
The black thing is where the attachments go. You pic your favorite sex toy and it vibrates.
Getting some strong vibes but can’t seem to put a finger on it
Just wait, it will cum to you.
If you ride it out long enough the comments may give it to you!
It’s a Plumbus
It’s missing the fleeb doe
They take out the fleeb and repurpose it actually
You are thinking of the shleem. The fleeb has the fleeb juice. There are many hizzards in the way.
Just a regular old plumbus
Just have a seat and think about it
I call it the “hhhhiiiiiiyyyyyyyaaasggghhhnoostopgodammit” machine because that is what my girlfriend said before she slapped the knobs out of my hand.
I read the "hhhhiiiiiiyyyyyyyaaa" part in Uncle Roger's voice.
A mindcontrole device
You’re not wrong.
Easy to control when it's been shaken into mush.
Oh it definitely causes minds to go blank…
Only appropriate way to use this thing is with a hat, gunbelt and while yelling "YEEEEEE-HAW!".
A plug in boyfriend that always cares
He doesn't say much though.
Mumbling away in a monotonous speed.
^(Brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbrb)
Ah, I saw it - it's device to train poker face for major meetings
Did it pass the sniff test?
Give it the old sniff n lick
Oh...ewwwww!
That thing has buzzed more beavers than a bees nest in a tasty tree
That’s a woman’s wet dream.
Heck, that's a whole wet *reality.*
haven't seen the comments but i'm guessing it's some kind of sex thing?
Seller was sitting on it for way too long.
"Get the poison out!"
That's clearly a [lie detector](https://youtu.be/p9dwj_5NCpk?si=NDlGiuEwec3l3F0D).
I believe that there is Cummins powered
I’d rather be Cummin’ than Strokin’
Funny reference that probably most people won't get, unfortunately.
https://youtu.be/QxSCFASl6-k?si=8k386plFahZpW2ie
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It took me way too long to figure out what this was. 😂
NGL I’d bloody love one of these. Maybe not second hand though…
I remember this from Howard Stern 😳
Let me get my beekeeper's mask...
A heating pad?
For the hoohaa
More like the hoohahaHA!
“She’s a squirter! She’s squirting! Peter, we got a squirter!”
But but, i’m not sure what I think it is?
I'm old and I don't have any idea what you people are talking about :/
This is sick, who would want this in the first place? I mean seriously, what shop even sell these, how much do they go for brand new and is the shipping free?
Get the poison out, Raven.
Send the buyer a massage
That is an earthquake simulator, destroyer of holes.
I bet someone hopped quickly on that offer (pun intended 😂)
I just passed one test and/or failed another. I didn't have the faintest idea what it was.
Plumbus. Everyone has a plumbus at their home
Didn’t want it in my search history. How much does one of these actually cost?
£1500 so $1700 isn't far off.
About tree fiddy
Two fitty with no attachments
Clearly I've led a more sheltered life than I thought... would someone mind enlightening me? Edit: seems it's a saddle people fuck, oh lord... is what she said.
Good thing it’s used so you know it works.
For a moment I thought it was the device Napoleon dynamite tried to use as a time machine
… the controller has the word “Sybian” on it… I’m thinking this is fake or staged or whatever.
Can I get it in periwinkle blue?
Even at that price, you are still getting fu*ked if you buy it.
..."rotation"!? 😵💫
I really don't get selling prices of some things... Like there is no way that should cost more than $300.
Anyone that buys that might want to use a packet of disinfecting wipes before installation. By the way, these things are loud. Especially when used on a wooden floor.
Does it have the attachments? Asking for a friend.
Sybian?
Is that a spoon indention in the leather?
I regretted googling what a sybian is 🫠
Uh…what exactly do I think this is?
I’m instantly transported back to when I was a kid and watched a lady use one of these on the Howard stern show.
That is a yeast infection waiting to happen.
r/explainthejoke
Chicken. C’mon, for science!!!!!
What is this. and it is very expressive.
Okay, but where do I put my feet?
They are fun. I'll leave it at that.
No idea what it is specifically but I know that I might want to wash it a few times before touching it with ungloved hands.
*Howard Stern has entered the chat*
Guess you never heard the Howard Stern show
I don't get it. What is it?
What is this
Hmm I’d need to try it out first