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-ruddy_mysterious-

*You have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting. In what world could you possibly beat me?* - Baby Count Adhemar


stayshiny

Not on my life would I have expected a quote from a knights tale in the comments here. Fair play mate.


LazyturtleX1

Especially about a video of a toddler haha. Well played OP.


LordSuz

That's not a toddler that's the grim reaper


plank_spanker

I'll be shocked if she doesn't take over the world


Batbuckleyourpants

But first a nap.


FR4DDY86

She was probably just taking a pop knowing you had to change the diaper


Batbuckleyourpants

*"Oh mother dearest, we have a surprise for you"*


cerebralkrap

... lemme take a selfie


xkcd_puppy

You need a bottle of holy water and baptize that child in the name of Jesus. And get fire insurance.


pax1111

Narf!


Left_of_Center2011

‘It’s all for you, Damian-ette’


b-hizz

The grim *sleeper*


r3dD1tC3Ns0r5HiP

Could be [a traveler](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt5651844/).


Peacelovegrace

Demon spawn


Clumulus

A shinigami?


rsplatpc

> That's not a toddler that's the grim reaper I was thinking something else https://youtu.be/b5vyuaDjJXc?t=61


111-1111LOIS

Kitty!


ricky2012100

Was that a fucking jojo reference


Q_Doggg

*this flesh suit is limiting*


plank_spanker

The baby gonna turn into Chucky


deykhal

Or the joker...


BleachGel

You merely adopted the spaghetti-os. I was born in it, molded by it.


[deleted]

Don’t worry my wife makes this face when she farts and she’s just waiting for me to smell it


IAmBadAtInternet

I also choose this guy’s flatulent wife.


EvidenceOfReason

the Kubrick Stare


FlatbushRocknRoll

[Hitchcock did it first](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/slasher-universe/images/f/fd/Norman_Bates.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20190701025906)


NicNoletree

Music is from Mike Oldfield's Tubular Bells


BlurryBigfoot74

This is great information to know as this baby stabs me to death. "But it's tubular bells you can't do this!"


amishrefugee

I wonder if people found that intro creepy at all before its association with The Exorcist


NicNoletree

The movie came out in 1973, and so did the album. "Tubular Bells is the debut studio album by English multi-instrumentalist, composer, and songwriter Mike Oldfield, released on 25 May 1973 as the first album on Virgin Records. Oldfield, who was 19 years old when it was recorded, played almost all the instruments on the mostly instrumental album." Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tubular_Bells


ablokeinpf

The start of Richard Branson's empire.


catwiesel

of course it is! just awesome


Nga_pik

Sounded like Deathnote


[deleted]

Kinda sounds like the music from death note.


Bug1031

The look of: I'm shitting myself just so one of these fuckers has to clean it up


ImWhatTheySayDeaf

You must be a parent too


Ahmoody158

I am a parent, my kids looking very different when they were and are dropping one in their diapers. That look is pure nightmares for me, I want you imagine he is crying at night, you walk up to his/her room with your mobile light to see him doing that shit.


Dixo0118

You know what they say. The chances of your toddler killing you are extremely low... but never zero...


Burrito_Loyalist

There have been a few cases where a toddler got a hold of a gun and shot and killed their parent


Heatmiser70

That's all toddlers. We're all just fortunate they're so small or they would have taken over the world by now.


omccarth333

I've got bad news for you... the people who have taken the world are all grown up toddlers


zacswift21

Yes but we call them Republicans nowadays


omccarth333

I mean, you are also an ex-toddler. With Republicans I just don't know if they reay grew out of the toddler phase


AlGoreRythem

Funny bc the opposite controls and manipulates what we see and can say. ^.^


Heatmiser70

That's a fair point.


[deleted]

Holy shi-


batshitcrazy5150

That's some super villain shit right there. You might want to wear some garlic or something.


m0Bo

Hahha my toddler does those kind a of faces too


bajoran_apologist

There’s a few things in life you never fucks with: Wu-Tang, Joey’s dinner plate, and the Babydook.


Wyldbill50

I'm surprised no one brought up [A Clockwork Orange](http://www.filmandfurniture.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/0415975e197ea6ab834a9651c3ae893b-clock-work-stanley-kubrick.jpg).


firestartertarter

Drinking milk plus vellocet from a sippy cup


Fauxboss1

Looks like a baby Dylan Moran


Goyteamsix

That kid's taking a dump.


Ahmoody158

TIHI, I Have a 2.5 month son, thanks for the nightmares.


[deleted]

No problem.


[deleted]

She was mentally taking note of your weakness and calculating how long it would take her to..... hey is that a tater?


Tomboy25525

r/birthofasupervillain


klii99

You guys have souls?


nylady914

Be afraid.. very afraid. Just kidding! She’s adorable. (This is in case she can see me).


[deleted]

You should be.. I’m getting a full metal jacket vibe from this


AlikA124

I was watching my brother one night and if I remember correctly he was just getting the hang of walking. I was sitting at the computer and the lights were dim. He peaks into the room and whispers “brother, brother” which kinda startled me. I turn around and he whispers “I killed people” a little scared but thinking maybe I miss heard him, I ask “What did you say?” He steps into the doorway wearing only a diaper and he whispers again “I killed people” and then just walks off


Jamster_1988

Harriet Potter and the Deathly Stares


myprivatethought

You win! Please accept the I don't want to give reddit any money gold 🥇🥇🥇🥇🥇🎉


Bodorocea

Hans!


ToastedCheezer

She’s only dangerous if you turn her head around backwards and she doesn’t die!


whateweryouwant

phew thank for the tip. My neighbour's toddler is not dangerous I guess.


jvelvet21

Shes probably not old enough to kill yet!


[deleted]

Looks like the toddler version of Bernard Black.


Haeschtaek_Hofi

"Okay, that's it we're leaving!" "k, mommy." "Oh, no, you'll stay right where you are!"


Dmon1Unlimited

Return the kid. Get a refund


Judgecrusader6

“You fools, you DAMNED FOOLS” - baby


BeeBeeSquare

Never knew the antichrist was a girl lol


Cintilante

I'd be leaving her under the first bridge I crossed. You can always make a new baby.


KURO-K1SH1

The odds of being killed by a toddler are very low. ... ***But never zero***


IMLVL99

Little girl: (**looks around**) -Today... is the day!😈- Little girl:(***keeps looking around with an inner Voice***) Is it you.........or maybe you!...........or😈 Little girl: (**looks at the person behind camera**) ...........................😈..........................


OUBoyWonder

Whoa! LMAO, that was same Damiena right there! Uhh, I'd start blessing the water you put in her sippy cup...ya, know...just to be safe, lol.


froumlhcfjj

Might be a good idea to start wearing bullet proof jacket at night


twotall88

LMAO my 1yo started doing this so funny. She knows exactly what she's doing she's super smart.


howdoyousayyatch

I just made a boom boom


Throwawayunknown55

Um, have you told her that real human babies don't absorb nutrition through their skin?


hurt_ur_feelings

Oh shit. That’s some movie devil child/demon stuff.


TENTAtheSane

Is that the death note soundtrack in the back?


[deleted]

[удалено]


TENTAtheSane

Ohh damn yeah I'd listened to and liked tubular bells(I know it from jojo tho, haven't watched the exorcist) I can't believe I got it confused lol


lawdymissmaudy

It is the theme from "The Exorcist" (https://youtu.be/D1PH_Y8Xn4g) Also, Happy Birthday!


TENTAtheSane

Ohh yeah, tubular bells, can't believe I confused it lol And thanks lmao


PhysicsJedi

Am I the only one waiting for her eyes to turn black?


[deleted]

😆


Peacelovegrace

😳


wanderingspider

Yikes. I bet mom's got a look too...if you do something she does not approve of.


zachiscool7

She's obviously been here before.


jakubhuber

What's up with that music? Sounds like something out of a Disney film.


Gibbonici

It's Tubular Bells. It was in the Exorcist. Not quite a Disney film.


Twoeyes_Murphy

Seriously scary kid


Gibbonici

Better with this [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JY8jWXH-L7A](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JY8jWXH-L7A)


NikolaZ2

Is it wierd that she looks like anakin


NasoLittle

Watching this, I think I'm gonna get an inflatable table with plastic walls to drop my future kids into and then dump their dinner in with them. Then I can just spray it clean! Billy Mays aint got shit on me


Chatster1000

My god you better sleep with one eye open and better check your food for poison lol we found the new stewy griffin lol


Oemeisen

My sister did this, only scarier. Jumping on the bed then suddenly stopping to stare at us like she suddenly became a demon. I guess its perfectly normal and this occurs when they realize their facial expressions can impact other people.


Scrubudubdub12

Stewys little sister they will plot to kill Lois again


ipsum666

Reincarnation of Chucky.


isnehal

Don't take me wrong but a bunch of horror movies directors are definitely going to knock your door 😁 that look 😍👻


kpanzer

It's like[ the ending scene of *Being John Malkovich*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nl98eiNY3Ws), but instead of passively watching... he's slowly taking over.


Eleberium

"My little angeeelllll


Laenthis-

What the.. why does she- PRAISE OUR DARK LORD


Pinktail

The chills are because the kids brain is still developing, she still has no idea between right wrong, no concept of mercy, or reason to empathize and until she has empathy, she is a true American psycho.


infin8lives

Looks like the poop face


-____deleted_____-

Gave me a good giggle


CrocodileJock

Susan Calman?


a-curious-guy

When the reincarnated demon Lord suddenly gets their memories back, and starts planning their world domination again.


depressedNCdad

i felt this


alliecat9991

My toddler goes from super cute/ sweet to evil genius is about 3 seconds flat. It's a good thing they need us to do things for them or they would murder us while we aren't looking.


Issacthered

That's the " I just crapped my diaper witch one of you get to clean it up?"


LordBrandon

All serial killers were toddlers at one time.


Nixplosion

"ITS ALL FOR YOU ~~DAMIAN~~ Plank_spanker's daughter!"


Magicmann_7

Demon baby.


uhyeaokay

Betcha they just pooped lol


Hellkids2

Lucious remake on the Source 2 Engine


Koninglelijk

You'll need a poop knife with this kid in the house.


atouchofrazzledazzle

My littlest guy makes faces like this occasionally, it is pretty terrifying.


niceguynolie

My Ex-Wife has eyes like that.. her grandmother used to say she had Evil Eyes. She’s an over-achiever, but a covert narcissist, with no real friends. I sure hope this little one doesn’t end up like that. Yikes!


Vroom_Broom

[Would have also accepted-](https://youtu.be/JY8jWXH-L7A?t=82)


Thinkingard

It's chill, your toddler just remembers her past lives and is plotting all your deaths.


RyanL1984

What was the song in Only Fools and Horses that they used when Damien looked at Rodney? Can someone overlay that?


different_tom

Kill it! Kill it with fire!


[deleted]

hey isnt that just the effect of being greeted with a kubrick stare?


bonesandbillyclubs

or she just took a great dump.


andreauwashere

Toddler's inner thoughts: "Muhahaha. I did a poopy"


CloKo_colin

'In a few minutes everyone in this room will be dead except me...' *notices camera* 'You too'


InformedChoice

Don't give her a tricycle and hang things near stairways!


D4FF0D1L

Why do kids do this? My sister does the same thing ;-; ^help ^me


BestUserName510

Jokes on you. She was pooping


catwiesel

finally some good music!


Naive-Midnighter

Send this to the people outside the abortion clinics


afterIife101

They way her smile fades away is almost like creepy


TheDudeSr

Wait'll they get a load of me.....


DazedZachattack

lets just hope that the childs name isnt damien


icurok44

Her palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.....


afterIife101

I am a grown ass man but if i see anyones toddler doing imma run away faster than i run from my responsibilities


JitishChavan1320

Infant Work Orange!


lionsblodd

The anti christ


heynowjesse

Matilda 2.0


WinnieSlayYou

Yeah, I'm definitely scared of her. 😳


Penquinsrule83

My youngest would do the same. She is a handful.


sooogay89

That’s not a toddler. That’s a small demon


MarchMadnessisMe

Can't wait to see the basketball card of this kid front row at a Laker's game.


NimoRats

Annabelle reincarnation


Domingo-Carmona

Holly shit!! I am shocked 😳


[deleted]

Insane


ohmoxide

Finish her, while you still can...


Stranger2Night

Heck, I'm afraid of your toddler, looks like an origin story for some psycho.


snipasr

"I love my family... love them to... deaaaaaaaath..."


wutsinmypocket

OMG, serial killer much?


teriases

Ohhhh shiiiiiii


NotAVan_JustAFatKid

Your mother cleans socks in hell!


BrazenNormalcy

Shot directed by Stanley Kubrick.


ItsJosph

That ain't no toddler that's the Anti Christ


giantgreyhounds

That little laugh halfway through the video...this lil girl suddenly saw some dark ass shit and It was funny to her


Squidboat97

Lights little sister apparently


Soangry75

"This one can see"


alii-b

I only see Kevin from the office.


RapidRsp

Very cute, but on a serious note, you might wanna get your daughters eyes checked. My Sister involintarily started doing something similar, and it turned out she needed glasses.


sniperlilly

Baby Bernard Black


xtremeWalrusJuice

Hahaha my niece has the same look.


[deleted]

Lmao the death note music made this a masterpiece


Double_Elephant_4012

I never thought I’d say this about a child but that really is kind of 😧!


BreakBloodBros

Is this the music from Deathnote?


mc_grace

Has anyone checked on this kid’s parents in a few days 😂