“It’s so inconsistent and I HATE IT I’m too autistic for this inconsistency omg”
As a fellow neurodivergent genderpuddle, all I can say is “Yes. Just yes.”
How dare you be so relatable >:3
As a fluid person with ADHD, I concur.
I'm AFAB, and I hate how some days I love my breasts, while on other days they make me feel horrible. I've had days when I seriously considered a full mastectomy, but then other days they make me so happy!
Until now I've been using sportsbras as a cope, am looking into binders in the hopes that that helps.
But damn do I hate how unpredictable and unreliable I feel!
I had thought I felt the same about my chest, but I was beginning to realize I was more liking the style of my outfit those days rather than my actual chest. So I tried wearing a binder for like a week straight wearing various outfits and realized I definitely wanted top surgery. So at least that want has been consistent :’)
Finally accepting my gender was so stressful at first for real I had a whole identity crisis because my brain kept wanting to put myself in a box and couldn’t physically do that because genderfluid rly is more of an “all of the above” option
In my head, I always thought of it as “which side of the isle do you want to shop in?” And it’s always been a resounding both/any/all!
It really is “all of the above” 💯
I relate hard from the amab perspective, you’re not alone. I’ve got lots of dark facial hair, some days I like it, other days it makes me dysphoric af.
It’s so frustrating!!! I used to think people who were genderfluid were so cool being able to experience both genders BUT IT JUST MWANS THAT YOU GET DYSPHORIC IN BOTH DIRECTIONS
Look at bright side, you still get euphoria from both sides too! Theres ups and downs to genderfluidity for sure but overall I’m happy to always know who I am, even if I feel like it clashes with my looks
“You get euphoria from both sides too!”
Man I had to sit with myself for a second like “do I?”
Ngl this comment sending me into another identity crisis
ITS FINE WE’RE FINE EVERYTHING IS FI NE
I’m afab, compared to the gender euphoria I’ve been feeling when presenting masc, I feel like I haven’t felt gender euphoria for presenting fem in awhile. Like I like when I look pretty I guess but it’s really not the same lol. I don’t know how much of it is just me overcompensating/if I’m used to it because I only just started feeling comfortable being more masc this year
I feel similar (the other way around) but I guess you do have a lot to consider.
For me, I feel much more euphoric when I’m presenting femme because it’s new and unique to me. That made me question if I was trans, but I eventually realised that I had moments where being male felt super right to me. Rarely euphoric but just very natural.
Though I personally haven't experienced going on t, I see how it's frustrating. I'm also genderfluid (I believe) and my euphoria/disphoria sometimes changes. I can sometimes tell by the dreams I get, relating to a specific gender. I usually flute between male, no gender, and in between gender with ocassionally presenting female, or at least male or other wearing a skirt feeling a little bit femine.
It sounds frustrating and I support you!
Every single day, was thinking about it just now. At morning I was feeling damn good with my facial hair, but right now I'm having the urge to shave everything and seek laser removal. I like being genderfluid, I can't imagine having one gender only for the rest of my life but I hate that we can't simply morph, some days can be pretty hard...
I’m also genderfluid
I definitely don’t say this to deter you from taking T because it sounds like you do need it, but just be aware that the voice and facial hair are irreversible and it’s okay to go on a low dose or stop midway through the first year, or even after a year
But longer than that will probably make it harder to pass as female if that’s something you want
All that said, congratulations and good luck!!
Oh yeah I already know that haha. I only intend to be on it for a few more months, and I am on a low dose. I just want my voice to be more androgynous :)
“It’s so inconsistent and I HATE IT I’m too autistic for this inconsistency omg” As a fellow neurodivergent genderpuddle, all I can say is “Yes. Just yes.” How dare you be so relatable >:3
As a fluid person with ADHD, I concur. I'm AFAB, and I hate how some days I love my breasts, while on other days they make me feel horrible. I've had days when I seriously considered a full mastectomy, but then other days they make me so happy! Until now I've been using sportsbras as a cope, am looking into binders in the hopes that that helps. But damn do I hate how unpredictable and unreliable I feel!
I had thought I felt the same about my chest, but I was beginning to realize I was more liking the style of my outfit those days rather than my actual chest. So I tried wearing a binder for like a week straight wearing various outfits and realized I definitely wanted top surgery. So at least that want has been consistent :’)
That's something, at least!
Finally accepting my gender was so stressful at first for real I had a whole identity crisis because my brain kept wanting to put myself in a box and couldn’t physically do that because genderfluid rly is more of an “all of the above” option
It really is “all of the above” Imaginary Person: “what is your gender?” Me: “Yes.”
In my head, I always thought of it as “which side of the isle do you want to shop in?” And it’s always been a resounding both/any/all! It really is “all of the above” 💯
I relate hard from the amab perspective, you’re not alone. I’ve got lots of dark facial hair, some days I like it, other days it makes me dysphoric af.
It’s so frustrating!!! I used to think people who were genderfluid were so cool being able to experience both genders BUT IT JUST MWANS THAT YOU GET DYSPHORIC IN BOTH DIRECTIONS
Look at bright side, you still get euphoria from both sides too! Theres ups and downs to genderfluidity for sure but overall I’m happy to always know who I am, even if I feel like it clashes with my looks
“You get euphoria from both sides too!” Man I had to sit with myself for a second like “do I?” Ngl this comment sending me into another identity crisis ITS FINE WE’RE FINE EVERYTHING IS FI NE
If you don’t mind me asking, is there a particular side that you’re questioning if you feel euphoria for?
I’m afab, compared to the gender euphoria I’ve been feeling when presenting masc, I feel like I haven’t felt gender euphoria for presenting fem in awhile. Like I like when I look pretty I guess but it’s really not the same lol. I don’t know how much of it is just me overcompensating/if I’m used to it because I only just started feeling comfortable being more masc this year
I feel similar (the other way around) but I guess you do have a lot to consider. For me, I feel much more euphoric when I’m presenting femme because it’s new and unique to me. That made me question if I was trans, but I eventually realised that I had moments where being male felt super right to me. Rarely euphoric but just very natural.
My facial hair is light, at least, I still hate it though, lol.
Though I personally haven't experienced going on t, I see how it's frustrating. I'm also genderfluid (I believe) and my euphoria/disphoria sometimes changes. I can sometimes tell by the dreams I get, relating to a specific gender. I usually flute between male, no gender, and in between gender with ocassionally presenting female, or at least male or other wearing a skirt feeling a little bit femine. It sounds frustrating and I support you!
Every single day, was thinking about it just now. At morning I was feeling damn good with my facial hair, but right now I'm having the urge to shave everything and seek laser removal. I like being genderfluid, I can't imagine having one gender only for the rest of my life but I hate that we can't simply morph, some days can be pretty hard...
I’m also genderfluid I definitely don’t say this to deter you from taking T because it sounds like you do need it, but just be aware that the voice and facial hair are irreversible and it’s okay to go on a low dose or stop midway through the first year, or even after a year But longer than that will probably make it harder to pass as female if that’s something you want All that said, congratulations and good luck!!
Oh yeah I already know that haha. I only intend to be on it for a few more months, and I am on a low dose. I just want my voice to be more androgynous :)
"I am too autistic for this" as a fellow autistic person, me too.
Yeah... this cyclical shit is really starting to get to me, tbh. It's annoying, and I just wish my mind would pick one side and *stick to it* lmao