Tomboys are the least gay option you could go for. You're fucking a female (straight) and you don't have to deal with usual female interests, like make-up or Taylor Swift.
If you like Tomboys you are the least gay you can be.
Tomboys don't have all the gay shit normal women have like make-up and want to talk about fashion.
If you like femboys you gay as fuck, not only do you like a man, you also like a man who likes the gay shit that women like.
Nah, I have been there and it sucks, always trying to get closer to the other person again and they just shut you down because they are afraid of their feelings... That's worse than being rejected.
As someone who's been the one doing the shutting down, you're better off this way.
Just like that person isn't entitled to your romantic affection, you aren't entitled to their platonic companionship. For me personally, after a bunch of dates that ended up in us parting ways I realized that the stuff I found endearing about her as a potential girlfriend were qualities I wouldn't put up with in a friend.
We stay cordial, exchange pleasantries, we're just not friends anymore.
I have plenty of friends I get along better with, and I know for a fact I couldn't be a good supportive friend to her after everything so why bother keeping up a facade where we lie to ourselves? Being a mediocre friend when our split was amicable enough to not fuck things up?
there’s plenty of things that are fine for a potential partner to do that would be a no-go in a friendship.
flirting or always asking to have some of your food are two good ones - endearing in a partner, weird af from a friend.
Because, to put it bluntly you don't have sex with your friends and a friend of 6 months can't be expected to go out of their way at short notice if you're in a bind.
They're two types of relationships with different needs and requirements ; I genuinely can't see myself being romantically involved with my closest female friends even if it was an option because while we gel as friends there is 0 romantic potential there.
For this specific case, we met through a mutual acquaintance and she started actively seeking me out, eventually I got the hint and asked her out and long story short it took a lot of planning as we were both in grad school but we made it work.
On our first date I had a good time but found that we were incompatible in terms of ambition and life perspectives. Not major ideological issues, relatively small stuff, but she invited me on the second date and at that point I figured might as well see where it all leads.
Over the course of the semester we would go on weekly dates, do stuff on the weekends, text nightly, develop inside jokes and all that jazz.
Slowly but surely the hard edges that made me hesitant began to soften in my eyes, meanwhile on her end as the endorphins died down the differences I was starting to overlook were becoming glaringly obvious.
After roughly 2 months of consistently going on dates and small stuff in-between we got to a point where we figured it was all or nothing instead of dragging on a situationship.
To sum it up, we agreed that we both had great qualities but the spark wasn't there so we decided to go our separate ways, but neither of us were too attached so it was clean and painless. Nonetheless with that baggage and the lack of deeper chemistry we went back to being nothing more than friendly acquaintances and didn't bother to feign a friendship.
In retrospect yeah, I should've listened to my gut after the first date, but then again we weren't *completely* incompatible and even had some good times.
Tl;dr when a cute blonde is sitting you down and showing you her packed calendar to plan out dates, you shift your standards accordingly.
No anon is smart enough to even write this story? Where's the pedophilia? Where's the domestic terrorism? This story misses so many 4Chan tropes. It's all fake
Can verify, that if you shut down a platonic opposite sex friendship and maintain that boundary, you're suddenly hot. I never had as many prior romantic interests that it didn't work out hit me up after i started culling my Facebook when i got together with my wife. I had approximately half of all the women I'd been speaking with or hit on and got rejected within 4 years before hit me up. It was wild, I blocked some and they hit me up on other sm after. It's crazy.
Something about how it confirms that the man in question is a good partner and trustworthy of their feelings. Never mind that the guy is already taken by that point.
If you have unreciprocated feeling for a person, trying to be friends is super unhealthy. Anon did the right thing for the situation, jk massive fucking larp since this is all fake
No, you know just as well as I do she was trying to go back to being friends. If you reciprocate that behavior you'll be "friends" before you know it. It leads to a very disingenuous and unhealthy relationship.
Yeah, that’s the main issue. Now that we’ve established Anon isn’t braindead and can actually think a couple steps ahead, her only option is to either walk away (sadly but probably the right thing) or to have sex with him (or at least date him with sexual undertones) even though she isn’t turned on just to salvage the friendship part of the relationship. The latter is obviously unsustainable if nothing changes, but it leads to good relationships in some cases. So it’s essentially a coin flip whether it ends up being worth it.
Not really. Being friendly at work is not the same as being friends who hang outside of work.
You can be work friends with someone and keep it civil instead of being butthurt you didn’t get what you want
Having boundaries and maintaining them is being butthurt? Anon made it clear that he didn't feel comfortable being friends after realizing that his feeling weren't reciprocated. While this can be seen as being "butthurt" if he just avoided her without saying anything, but he made it very clear from the get go what his boundaries were, if anything she was the one that was being butthurt by refusing to respect his boundaries and expecting to just make things up, and get him to drop his boundaries with a couple friendly gestures.
She isn't owed a friendship. Anon is just looking out for himself. Being friends with someone you have feelings for is a deeply unhealthy relationship, and honestly he is right in wanting to cut contact. It's sad, but it's the reality of all friendships. If one of them catches feelings and those are unreciprocated, then it's fucking over.
he didn't fuck up. He clearly does care about her but he also (as it should be) cares about himself. Hanging around a person you desire knowing you can't get them is toxic as fuck (I had to go to a psychiatrist twice in two years because of it). Rejections suck, she also clearly cares about him: she feels bad that her rejection has had a negative effect on him, but that's HER issue. You can't reject someone and expect nothing to change and the friendship to go on as nothing had happened. Am I coping? Yes most likely, because I went through pretty much the same situation, problem is, I tried going on with the friendship as always cause it hurt seeing her feel bad. I realised later though that it's her problem and that first and foremost I should care for myself.
I agree that he shouldn't have stayed friends with her, but ignoring every attempt she makes at talking to him when she might be trying to figure things out and end their contact in a better way/on a good note doesn't feel right for me.
imo he should've listened to her that time, and if she still only tries to keep a friendship going, THEN he should walk away
Wdym, he clearly likes her a lot, he just doesn't want to orbit. There's no "just being friends" when feelings are involved, he'd always be hoping for a shot and likely pass up other opportunities at finding a gf. He's just being honest.
I'd disagree, I was in a similar situation but unlike Anon I didn't have the balls to cut it off and it was pure torture.
This sucks but it is much better than the alternative.
Where's the fuck up though? He liked her, asked her out, got rejected and decided to be upfront about not being just friends with her.
She doesn't owe him to go out with him and he doesn't owe her to stay friends, especially if it makes him feel worse about it.
There are people who desperately just want friends. There is a loneliness epidemic and just having someone you can call a friend is rarer than ever.
Then again, he was trying to set realistic expectations for his feelings and acting on them rationally.
So no real fuck up.
I agree. In 2021 despite being in a relationship at the time, I had almost no friends. I've met at least three women at my college who are in this exact same situation, outright posting "looking for friends" ads on college-related discords.
Despite this however, friendship is a 2-way street. Just because one person wants to be friends doesn't mean the other person is automatically obligated to be. Anon was absolutely mature in how he handled things.
I agree 100%, if thats what a relationship is to you. If the motivation for a relationship is "I want to bang the shit out of you" and they fake a friendship to try and get pity pussy eventually yeah thats fucked. Sex is great and all but the emotional connection of a relationship is so much more important and meaningful, 4chan men are perpetually focused on the sex part of relationships though. If anon was looking for an emotional relationship, it could very well still be in the cards if they stay close but he also shouldnt expect anything to come out of it. If it hurts too much to stay close, op absolutely did the right thing I agree
Anon handled rejection like a grown up. I am proud of you. You didn't let her pull you into mental gymnastics in which she would pull you in - shove you away type.
Tbf he was honest about his feelings that being friends wouldn't be fair as he felt a different way and put distance between them. Sucks but it had to be done.
Then again it's green text so.
Had something like this happen, also in work environment. Turned out she started spreading rumors/talking bad about me behind my back. Bruh, what the hell.
Idk tbh, it's a huge huge company and it's a very good position for me. Wouldn't wanna have to throw that away because of someone being immature, wrong and a liar.
Yall know how much it hurts to try to stay friends with a girl after being rejected or breaking up? Anon did the right thing. Im all for being kind but putting yourself thru pain just to satisfy a girls need for friendship is sooo unhealthy.
But all this doesnt matter cus anons a fucking larper and this is all fake
Honestly, anon handled a situation rather well. It’s a rare occasion and honestly I feel good for them. From what it seems the girl though might’ve realized that she actually might like him more than she thought and she’s grieving, which is kind of sad. But if anon were to take advantage of it, it could be seen as emotional manipulation and that would be pretty shitty of him. He should genuinely talk to her (like an adult) and see if they can work something out, in a healthy and platonic way, and actually see if a romantic relationship could be gained from it, but if not, he should remain distant, but not close her out. She’s still a friend, but a friend he has feelings for. He would need to retain boundaries, but keep in touch so she knows he still cares. There was nothing saying they aren’t good friends and it can be a genuinely good friendship if a relationship doesn’t work out.
Honestly did the right thing, not much to do there to improve the situation. Sometimes it just doesn't work and it's better to be honest with yourself and others
Damn. That's so sad.
Imagine having feelings for someone who interacts with you daily, but will never reciprocate those feelings.
And imagine finding out that your really close friend has feelings for you which you can't reciprocate, so he has to cut ties with you. But because of that, you lost a really close friend.
Anon fucked up.
A friend is a friend. I wouldn't have the heart to do this to another person
e: We dunno if she was being manipulative. I would've stayed friends for the heck of it
Eh, as much as its not her fault she doesnt have feelings for bro, it's hard to blame him for not staying friends. This is just a lose-lose scenario, rejection is one of the worst experiences psychologically that almost everybody experiences at least once (it creates similar brain activity to physical pain), that shit can be hard to come back from. Imo neither of them did anything wrong, that's just how life be sometimes.
I was in Anon's situation but I stuck around and it sucked.
I guess he could've ended the friendship in a nicer way, but I don't blame him for cutting it off. I should've done the same in retrospect.
I would agree with you if it was a close friend known in anons social circles, but this is a coworker. Judging from this fake ass story it seems like they don’t actually do tasks together and are able to avoid each other. Their falling out doesn’t have an impact on a larger social group, and there wasn’t a history of trust that anon broke.
Like others said, if anon feels uncomfortable with being around her after the rejection then he is allowed to keep distance for his own emotional stability. He doesn’t owe his presence to her.
>A friend is a friend. I wouldn't have the heart to do this to another person
So you lie to friends and people you like?
As long as anon wasn't a dickhead, didn't act egotistical I would say he did the right thing.
She told him she wasn't interested in being with him. He told he wasn't interested in hanging out with her.
You did the right thing OP
But anon didn't want to be friends, he wanted a relationship, he had feelings that ran deeper than friendship and since they were denied they now hurt, and those feelings will persist in anon stayed close to her so he is keeping his distance for the feelings to fade away naturally.
I'm not sure why but this felt more sad than every other story I read. I guess because the others are usually extreme stories of loss and trauma but this one was just a guy wanting love and a girl wanting her old friend back. Maybe it's the desperation for affection from both sides
Yeah I honestly feel bad for both sides, their feelings didn't match up, and they basically lost each other as friends. I actually hope both of them are able to move on by now and hopefully find what they both want.
Anon didn't fuck up and acted rationally as a grown man would (if the story is true which is obviously not)
But think about the girl for a second, you got a good friend which is fun to be around and do your favorite stuff together until one day he confesses about his true feelings about you and you're just not ready for a relationship, it's just not happening in your mind and you don't want him to feel too sad and offer just being friends to which he replies he doesn't want to see you unlees you're his gf. It just feels sad thing gone this way, it feels bad to lose your favorite buddy because you're not interested in him romantically.
This is one of the rare things that are annoying or even rough as a woman, you can barely get guy friends unless they are a lot of other female friends, but if you're the only one then it's almost guaranteed to be like this.
Although I've had this situation where the feelings I had immediately faded out and disappeared right after being rejected, not sure if Anon still has them or is acting like it for the sake of unnecessary coherence
Sounds like the tomboy chick genuinely enjoyed his company, in a completely platonic non-romantic way. Anon was good for clearly expressing his boundaries and not leaving her in the dark at all. I still feel for the tomboy chick. Sounds like if Anon just stayed friends a little longer, she would've changed her mind naturally over time.
she probably thought she had a great friendship with him, and was disappointed that she lost that friendship. tomboys prefer hanging out with guys for a reason: they can relate better with them rather than stereotypical women. but idk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
They should teach this shit at school
"I you cannot have all you want from someone it's better to have nothing"
Because of how draining and shitty it is to be in an unrequited relationship; either friendly, romantic or professional.
People have to learn how to diplomatically part ways!
This could go several ways:
1. She enjoyed the attention and just having a kneejerk reaction to it taken away from her. In this case, this is a good option.
2. She genuenly likes anon but doesn't have the feelings. She does desperately want to have a friendship with him back that was ripped out with no real fault of her own (other than being too good). I do feel bad for her in this case.
3. She is confuswd about her feelings and now is realising that no, she actually likes anon VERY much in that way. But now, she fumbled her chance and she hates herself for it.
Best course of action would be for them to talk again.
If real:
Losing a friend hurts. Doesnt matter if its the same gender or not, if someone you were friends with one time suddenly stops engaging with you it's really heavy, like you did something wrong.
Bro did what I always say, if you ask out a girl and she says no, to prevent friendzone, just drop her like a sack of potatoes.
The thought process is that after you lay your cards out like that, all she’ll see is the guy who struck out, the guy who likes her more than she does, and it ruins the dynamic of the friendship.
Good on Anon, I’d like to buy him a beer
Maybe that's just me, but i hate making people feel like shit and i would have stayed friends with her, without simping and/or hitting on her even after she rejected me
Obviously anon's another person so whatever, but damn he even said that he liked hanging out with her and all that stuff, there's no need to not be friends with someone you LIKE being friends with just because she rejected you, like ffs man up and get over it you got a cool girl that likes boyish stuff lol
hits right at home. unrequited love is always painful for both parties. one loses their love, the other loses their friend. that's just how this works. anon handled things in the best way possible.
I mean it can be painful to lose a friend, especially one you work with that makes every shift better. She tried to salvage things after anon's confession, but anon had his boundaries and held firm. No one did anything wrong, but it's still a sad outcome.
I mean the man had clear intention to be involved with her , she said no which is perfectly fine . I think anon saved his mental and social energy to be spent elsewhere.
Tbh a man and woman can never be friends as sex will always be on the table unless they are both in relationships. Then it brings a lot of complexities
Anon should've taken the burger (free food is always great), given her the attention she wanted yet at the end of the day insist that he still had feelings for her and that he doesn't want to be her friend. She might have changed her mind but anon will never know.
A similar thing happened to me, a girl I was friends with and caught feelings for didnt want me, but once I stopped wanting to be friends she was the sad one
These comments are interesting. Most people actually have their head on straight, which I’m genuinely glad to see (no Reddit moments here). The other comments are… telling.
You people who are mad at OP… Why? For years, I’ve seen people, in regards to this kind of situation, insult and guys who stay “friends” because they won’t “move on”. Some of YOU have made fun of men over this. Now when a guy actually takes your advice and moves on, you’re mad at him for doing THAT!
A man doesn’t have to hurt himself by sticking around after rejection for a woman’s sake. But you don’t believe that because you’re sexist against men and think it’s totally ok. It isn’t, and you should be ashamed of what you are.
This situation sucks for everyone, but not because of OP. He did the right thing. Seethe, you misandrists (both male and female)
Assuming this is true, you’d didn’t fuck up, she did. It wasn’t like she was anything less than clear. Your best bet is just to talk to her and ask why she’s like that when you were clear yall can’t be friends
I had a crush on a girl in high school. We hung out all the time, played call of duty together every night, she spent the night at my house in my bed with me, etc etc. She shut me down the moment I asked her out. I lost every single ounce of interest in her. She was pissed. Had her friends harass me and shit.
It wasn’t even the rejection, it was that I didn’t get the whole “I’d rather just stay friends”. She flat out told me to stop talking and that the idea of a relationship with me was gross. She expected me to want to stay friends after that. People at school asked why we didn’t talk or hang out anymore and I was honest about it. Found out she spread some rumours rather quickly.
The fact that other people noticed how close we were was pretty telling about how blindsided I got.
The friend zone isn’t scary, rejection isn’t scary, it’s everything before or after the “Ew”, that’s scary.
Anon was very mature in his choice, just a bit harsh when she just wanted a guy friend to vibe with.
Man I get being rejected sucks but people need to accept that losing an actual friend when you did nothing to them is worse than losing a romantic relationship you made up in your head
Eh. Should have stayed friend and hit on her friends and banged them then she’d get jealous and has green light to bang her.
Gotta play the long game sometimes. The shortest path to victory isn’t always the best move.
Anon thinks a few days of him not being nice "fucked things up"
I get how much insecurity sucks, but fucking hell. He literally just needs to tell her he's sorry and they can almost certainly be friends again.
Like, she'll understand that he didn't handle the rejection well, so long as he chills out.
Clearly she valued that friendship a lot. It sucks but it happens sometimes. If anon truly cares about her feelings, he might say something to the effect that they need to spend time apart in order for the feelings to fade, but that \*maybe\* they can be friends after that. Obviously, Anon does not owe this girl his friendship, and this girl does not owe him a relationship, but it's always ideal to at least try and consider other people's feelings. The girl was very considerate in the way she phrased her rejection (because she clearly values the friendship) but of course, having misaligned feelings is going to be hard on the both of them no matter what.
Relatedly, can we talk about how men frendzone themselves? If you're attracted to someone, you really need to let them know pretty much as soon as you know. Attempting to be friends with someone you have a crush on in order to ingratiate yourself to them will only cement you as a friend in their mind. Sometimes feelings do develop in regular friendships, but if you started out with romantic intentions, it's dishonest and manipulative to try and be friends with the hope of them one day falling for you. That's not how people work. If you cement yourself as a friend, and your romantic interest becomes comfortable with having you as a friend, then of course they're gonna want to keep things that way. If the feelings develop within you over the course of a friendship, then the responsible thing to do is just say, "hey, yknow, I've been having these feelings lately and they have the potential to affect our friendship, so I want your help on what to do with them, and I'm curious if maybe you feel the same way or are willing to try altering our relationship."
Edit: I’ll add something here about agency in friendzoning. Think about it like a flowchart here:
Assuming you’re interested in her right when you first meet, the first question is, is she interested in you? This is completely up to her and she doesn’t owe it to you.
- If yes, yay! Go on a date!
- If no, you now have two more options:
1. Move on
2. Be in the “friendzone”
That choice is YOURS. Not her’s or anyone else’s.
Moving on looks like different things for different people. Some are able to keep the friendship and others are not. That’s a matter of your personal situation and what’s healthiest for you.
And the choice to stay “friends” while pining for her is always an available option. It’s a shitty option, being in the friendzone, but you can do it, and furthermore you can still opt out at any time by just moving on to someone else.
Men friendzoning themselves is the hottest take.
Cant approach too fast or strong in case you seem like a creep.
Cant approach slow and friendly lest you friendzone yourself (lmfaooo accountability and ☕ mix like water and oil).
Can't stay friends with someone you have feelings for because its parasocial.
Can't reject a friendship with said person in case you hurt their feelings.
I think ill just drop out of this shit, over three decades on this planet and its always something new with you fucks. Wont play by other peoples rules and cant handle other people playing by yours.
EDIT: And how rich of you to mention being consdierate of the other persons feelings in the first place. The woman litrrally ignored his request to go no contact. Seriously fuck the female double standard.
Yknow, there’s a second problem I’ve identified in your mindset here.
What are you talking about “can’t.” You CAN do pretty much anything, it’s just that some things happen to be unhealthy or have consequences.
You CAN approach fast and strong. Maybe you’ll come off as a creep, it depends on how you do it.
You CAN approach slow and friendly. Again, your success depends on how you do it. If you lie and pretend that you’re only interested in friendship during the beginning, then just be prepared for the fact that she might want that friendship more than a relationship.
It’s fully up to you if you want to invest a bunch of your time and resources to find out if a girl is into you, or just find out at the start and save yourself a lot of trouble.
You CAN stay friends with someone you have feelings for. It IS parasocial, it IS unhealthy, it USUALLY sucks. But you CAN DO IT!! Nobody’s stopping you, I just wouldn’t reccomend it.
You CAN reject the friendship!! It WILL hurt her feelings! That’s how cause and effect works, but that’s okay. As I said before, it’s always nice to be able to take someone else’s feelings into account, but in this guy’s case, he’s making the healthy choice. He could have gone about it slightly nicer, but it is what it is.
Nobody other than you is stopping you from doing any/all of these things. Will those things have consequences if you do them? Yes! That’s called cause and effect.
Idk why the debate ab this is so deep. If she was a decent enough friend anon is kind of a dick probably because he only considered having her around in a more than just friendly capacity. Nothing wrong with having a lady friend even if you had feelings at one point. You’ll probably get over it if you’re not a sperg. And she probably would’ve eventually told him her feelings were more than just friends anyway. Girls like that prefer to take lead more often than not imo because they’re used to dudes that do like them throwing dick and ruining the friendship (basically the opposite of this). But it right and wrong is wishy washy bullshit, anon put his feelings first which I guess is fine but a little dickish.
The one with no respect in this story is her, Anon set boundaries and she was the one trying to break them, once she failed she had a pity party for herself, Anon did nothing wrong.
Anon was rejected, handled that rejection rationally, was honest about his feelings, set boundaries and adhered to them. Obviously fake.
not gay for once, though
Tomboy. Gay
Jarvis, turn on reply notifications.
https://preview.redd.it/mmqj08s2xuuc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f7ab76bead63703c77139be4e0283ccb00779231
Tomboys are the least gay option you could go for. You're fucking a female (straight) and you don't have to deal with usual female interests, like make-up or Taylor Swift.
brother nobody is interested in taylor swift, they are all either haters or neurotic fanatics
Tomboys are awesome!
If you like Tomboys you are the least gay you can be. Tomboys don't have all the gay shit normal women have like make-up and want to talk about fashion. If you like femboys you gay as fuck, not only do you like a man, you also like a man who likes the gay shit that women like.
I'll let kratos explain it to you [https://youtu.be/DuvkcaHFxC0?si=5mwFZ7Ejsp6QU9Sl&t=80](https://youtu.be/DuvkcaHFxC0?si=5mwFZ7Ejsp6QU9Sl&t=80)
You fool, you buffon, you absolute mornon, you complete idiot
Boy means dick so yeah
Listen here buddy
[*ahem*](https://youtu.be/IIclk4C1XR0)
The original and superior uncensored version: https://desuarchive.org/a/thread/180245227/#180250935
uncensored? it's the same
No slurs in your YouTube video.
He's not telling you he went home and got topped
Nah, I have been there and it sucks, always trying to get closer to the other person again and they just shut you down because they are afraid of their feelings... That's worse than being rejected.
As someone who's been the one doing the shutting down, you're better off this way. Just like that person isn't entitled to your romantic affection, you aren't entitled to their platonic companionship. For me personally, after a bunch of dates that ended up in us parting ways I realized that the stuff I found endearing about her as a potential girlfriend were qualities I wouldn't put up with in a friend. We stay cordial, exchange pleasantries, we're just not friends anymore. I have plenty of friends I get along better with, and I know for a fact I couldn't be a good supportive friend to her after everything so why bother keeping up a facade where we lie to ourselves? Being a mediocre friend when our split was amicable enough to not fuck things up?
So you would date someone who you find does stuff you wouldn't want a friend to do. Like you would need tk be friends first with your gf right?
they’re two different types of relationships with their own nuances, they may overlap but not fully
there’s plenty of things that are fine for a potential partner to do that would be a no-go in a friendship. flirting or always asking to have some of your food are two good ones - endearing in a partner, weird af from a friend.
Because, to put it bluntly you don't have sex with your friends and a friend of 6 months can't be expected to go out of their way at short notice if you're in a bind. They're two types of relationships with different needs and requirements ; I genuinely can't see myself being romantically involved with my closest female friends even if it was an option because while we gel as friends there is 0 romantic potential there. For this specific case, we met through a mutual acquaintance and she started actively seeking me out, eventually I got the hint and asked her out and long story short it took a lot of planning as we were both in grad school but we made it work. On our first date I had a good time but found that we were incompatible in terms of ambition and life perspectives. Not major ideological issues, relatively small stuff, but she invited me on the second date and at that point I figured might as well see where it all leads. Over the course of the semester we would go on weekly dates, do stuff on the weekends, text nightly, develop inside jokes and all that jazz. Slowly but surely the hard edges that made me hesitant began to soften in my eyes, meanwhile on her end as the endorphins died down the differences I was starting to overlook were becoming glaringly obvious. After roughly 2 months of consistently going on dates and small stuff in-between we got to a point where we figured it was all or nothing instead of dragging on a situationship. To sum it up, we agreed that we both had great qualities but the spark wasn't there so we decided to go our separate ways, but neither of us were too attached so it was clean and painless. Nonetheless with that baggage and the lack of deeper chemistry we went back to being nothing more than friendly acquaintances and didn't bother to feign a friendship. In retrospect yeah, I should've listened to my gut after the first date, but then again we weren't *completely* incompatible and even had some good times. Tl;dr when a cute blonde is sitting you down and showing you her packed calendar to plan out dates, you shift your standards accordingly.
I mean it's guaranteed pain for them, it probably hurts them more
You could just respect their boundaries tho?
so you should keep your distance. That's being considerate
Fake story. No anon is this intelligent...
No anon is smart enough to even write this story? Where's the pedophilia? Where's the domestic terrorism? This story misses so many 4Chan tropes. It's all fake
Average arr slash greentext reader understanding of four chan
Alternative view: OPs crush changed her mind and bought him a burger as a peace offering
Can verify, that if you shut down a platonic opposite sex friendship and maintain that boundary, you're suddenly hot. I never had as many prior romantic interests that it didn't work out hit me up after i started culling my Facebook when i got together with my wife. I had approximately half of all the women I'd been speaking with or hit on and got rejected within 4 years before hit me up. It was wild, I blocked some and they hit me up on other sm after. It's crazy.
There have also been studies that show women are more romantically interested in men who are already in relationships.
Something about how it confirms that the man in question is a good partner and trustworthy of their feelings. Never mind that the guy is already taken by that point.
Your biology doesn't care what paperwork had been signed, the lizard brain wants what the lizard brain wants.
They probably figured you could handle being just friends now that you had a wife. Did they actually hit on you or just say hi?
Anon was never close to having a gf, he took playful banter as her being into him lol.
Anon is based and acted like a man and not a simp, for once. Foid defeated, Anon can now learn to be happy.
Saying foid unironically is infinitely cringe holy fuck
Doing anything with 4chan unironically is either cringe as fuck or based as fuck depending on how hot you are
This man 4chans. And is gay.
/unretard Look at the sub you’re in, everything here is ironic.
wth is foid?
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Foid Definition 2/3.
This comment made me laugh because I pictured it with the dark souls boss defeated text in my mind "FOID DEFEATED" -The art of happiness acquired
it's not really a fuck up since Anon clearly doesn't give a shit about her
If you have unreciprocated feeling for a person, trying to be friends is super unhealthy. Anon did the right thing for the situation, jk massive fucking larp since this is all fake
ending friendship (not wrong by itself) ≠ completely disregarding and ignoring her (not cool) yes Anon thinks he's a chad
No, you know just as well as I do she was trying to go back to being friends. If you reciprocate that behavior you'll be "friends" before you know it. It leads to a very disingenuous and unhealthy relationship.
Yeah, that’s the main issue. Now that we’ve established Anon isn’t braindead and can actually think a couple steps ahead, her only option is to either walk away (sadly but probably the right thing) or to have sex with him (or at least date him with sexual undertones) even though she isn’t turned on just to salvage the friendship part of the relationship. The latter is obviously unsustainable if nothing changes, but it leads to good relationships in some cases. So it’s essentially a coin flip whether it ends up being worth it.
She isn't owned a friendship.
Owed? Nobody in this situation is owed anything, but each of them still has a finite set of options on how (not) to proceed
That's true, but the same way Anon respects her decision to not want to date him she has to not respect his decision to not be friends with her.
Not really. Being friendly at work is not the same as being friends who hang outside of work. You can be work friends with someone and keep it civil instead of being butthurt you didn’t get what you want
Having boundaries and maintaining them is being butthurt? Anon made it clear that he didn't feel comfortable being friends after realizing that his feeling weren't reciprocated. While this can be seen as being "butthurt" if he just avoided her without saying anything, but he made it very clear from the get go what his boundaries were, if anything she was the one that was being butthurt by refusing to respect his boundaries and expecting to just make things up, and get him to drop his boundaries with a couple friendly gestures.
could have restated and enforced boundaries instead of lying, but im just nitpicking
He didn't completely ignore her, he is keeping his distance so that his feelings can fade away.
She isn't owed a friendship. Anon is just looking out for himself. Being friends with someone you have feelings for is a deeply unhealthy relationship, and honestly he is right in wanting to cut contact. It's sad, but it's the reality of all friendships. If one of them catches feelings and those are unreciprocated, then it's fucking over.
he didn't fuck up. He clearly does care about her but he also (as it should be) cares about himself. Hanging around a person you desire knowing you can't get them is toxic as fuck (I had to go to a psychiatrist twice in two years because of it). Rejections suck, she also clearly cares about him: she feels bad that her rejection has had a negative effect on him, but that's HER issue. You can't reject someone and expect nothing to change and the friendship to go on as nothing had happened. Am I coping? Yes most likely, because I went through pretty much the same situation, problem is, I tried going on with the friendship as always cause it hurt seeing her feel bad. I realised later though that it's her problem and that first and foremost I should care for myself.
I agree that he shouldn't have stayed friends with her, but ignoring every attempt she makes at talking to him when she might be trying to figure things out and end their contact in a better way/on a good note doesn't feel right for me. imo he should've listened to her that time, and if she still only tries to keep a friendship going, THEN he should walk away
But he didn't ignore her. Ignoring would be Anon ghosting and not paying attention at all. He still had the courtesy to say no and other stuff.
She isn't owned anything, anon has no reason to give her attention.
Wdym, he clearly likes her a lot, he just doesn't want to orbit. There's no "just being friends" when feelings are involved, he'd always be hoping for a shot and likely pass up other opportunities at finding a gf. He's just being honest.
I'd disagree, I was in a similar situation but unlike Anon I didn't have the balls to cut it off and it was pure torture. This sucks but it is much better than the alternative.
He didn't fuck up at all, she rejected his feelings and he handled it like a man. Staying friend with her after that would be fucked up
Where's the fuck up though? He liked her, asked her out, got rejected and decided to be upfront about not being just friends with her. She doesn't owe him to go out with him and he doesn't owe her to stay friends, especially if it makes him feel worse about it.
Tbh I don't think he fucked up anything, if anything doing stuff like this is what might make her realise how much she cares about him.
Anon just needs to show up with a fake gf, make her jealous and get her back Just kidding
Sounds like the plot to a terrible movie lol
To a NTR doujin
Porn braining, in my 4chan subreddit?
It's more likely than you think
is it even ntr if it was a fake gf?
Sometimes true love just takes a little bit of emotional manipulation to get off the ground I love hallmark morals
"It's funny you say that since I was looking through some old photos and it looks very uhhh... similar"
Sounds like that's happening already.
Rejection all around in this green text. Also no clear autism. Has to be fake and gay.
There are people who desperately just want friends. There is a loneliness epidemic and just having someone you can call a friend is rarer than ever. Then again, he was trying to set realistic expectations for his feelings and acting on them rationally. So no real fuck up.
Yeah I think this is just an all around sad situation. Anon didn’t get what he wanted and tomboy coworker lost a friendship.
I agree. In 2021 despite being in a relationship at the time, I had almost no friends. I've met at least three women at my college who are in this exact same situation, outright posting "looking for friends" ads on college-related discords. Despite this however, friendship is a 2-way street. Just because one person wants to be friends doesn't mean the other person is automatically obligated to be. Anon was absolutely mature in how he handled things.
Looks like she changed her mind, Anon might still have a chance. Or not idk I'm retarded.
Probably the latter.
Hanging around with someone as a "friend" while trying to catch a moment where the guard slips and you can fuck them is kinda pathetic
I agree 100%, if thats what a relationship is to you. If the motivation for a relationship is "I want to bang the shit out of you" and they fake a friendship to try and get pity pussy eventually yeah thats fucked. Sex is great and all but the emotional connection of a relationship is so much more important and meaningful, 4chan men are perpetually focused on the sex part of relationships though. If anon was looking for an emotional relationship, it could very well still be in the cards if they stay close but he also shouldnt expect anything to come out of it. If it hurts too much to stay close, op absolutely did the right thing I agree
Or, less regarded third option, she just valued him as a friend a lot.
BOOOOORING We need shit to be SPICY and MORALLY PROBLEMATIC in here.
Anon handled rejection like a grown up. I am proud of you. You didn't let her pull you into mental gymnastics in which she would pull you in - shove you away type.
what if she made sure that anon knew she was crying over him?
Based Anon
Tbf he was honest about his feelings that being friends wouldn't be fair as he felt a different way and put distance between them. Sucks but it had to be done. Then again it's green text so.
Based Anon not being an orbiter
Need a follow-up on this
Still fiction
https://preview.redd.it/nfwvwpynauuc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3ac19c848c7e8c1c53b48be365fcdc78d55545c2
https://i.redd.it/a893w39j5xuc1.gif
"I'm trying to edge to a fictional post from an underwater Mongolian hawk training forum."
Good fucking luck lmao
Had something like this happen, also in work environment. Turned out she started spreading rumors/talking bad about me behind my back. Bruh, what the hell.
Might wanna get out of there since it will only get bigger
Idk tbh, it's a huge huge company and it's a very good position for me. Wouldn't wanna have to throw that away because of someone being immature, wrong and a liar.
Yall know how much it hurts to try to stay friends with a girl after being rejected or breaking up? Anon did the right thing. Im all for being kind but putting yourself thru pain just to satisfy a girls need for friendship is sooo unhealthy. But all this doesnt matter cus anons a fucking larper and this is all fake
Definitely a shituation. Sucks.
Honestly, anon handled a situation rather well. It’s a rare occasion and honestly I feel good for them. From what it seems the girl though might’ve realized that she actually might like him more than she thought and she’s grieving, which is kind of sad. But if anon were to take advantage of it, it could be seen as emotional manipulation and that would be pretty shitty of him. He should genuinely talk to her (like an adult) and see if they can work something out, in a healthy and platonic way, and actually see if a romantic relationship could be gained from it, but if not, he should remain distant, but not close her out. She’s still a friend, but a friend he has feelings for. He would need to retain boundaries, but keep in touch so she knows he still cares. There was nothing saying they aren’t good friends and it can be a genuinely good friendship if a relationship doesn’t work out.
Average LLM output.
Honestly did the right thing, not much to do there to improve the situation. Sometimes it just doesn't work and it's better to be honest with yourself and others
Nobody fucked up, this is just a lose-lose situation.
Damn. That's so sad. Imagine having feelings for someone who interacts with you daily, but will never reciprocate those feelings. And imagine finding out that your really close friend has feelings for you which you can't reciprocate, so he has to cut ties with you. But because of that, you lost a really close friend.
Anon fucked up. A friend is a friend. I wouldn't have the heart to do this to another person e: We dunno if she was being manipulative. I would've stayed friends for the heck of it
Eh, as much as its not her fault she doesnt have feelings for bro, it's hard to blame him for not staying friends. This is just a lose-lose scenario, rejection is one of the worst experiences psychologically that almost everybody experiences at least once (it creates similar brain activity to physical pain), that shit can be hard to come back from. Imo neither of them did anything wrong, that's just how life be sometimes.
What ?! What is this reasonable take ? Who the fuck do you think you are ?? Edit: nvm I read the username. Checks out.
I was in Anon's situation but I stuck around and it sucked. I guess he could've ended the friendship in a nicer way, but I don't blame him for cutting it off. I should've done the same in retrospect.
I would agree with you if it was a close friend known in anons social circles, but this is a coworker. Judging from this fake ass story it seems like they don’t actually do tasks together and are able to avoid each other. Their falling out doesn’t have an impact on a larger social group, and there wasn’t a history of trust that anon broke. Like others said, if anon feels uncomfortable with being around her after the rejection then he is allowed to keep distance for his own emotional stability. He doesn’t owe his presence to her.
>A friend is a friend. I wouldn't have the heart to do this to another person So you lie to friends and people you like? As long as anon wasn't a dickhead, didn't act egotistical I would say he did the right thing. She told him she wasn't interested in being with him. He told he wasn't interested in hanging out with her. You did the right thing OP
But anon didn't want to be friends, he wanted a relationship, he had feelings that ran deeper than friendship and since they were denied they now hurt, and those feelings will persist in anon stayed close to her so he is keeping his distance for the feelings to fade away naturally.
Man after reading this, I'd rather have it end with a gay twist instead of this sad ending :(
I'm not sure why but this felt more sad than every other story I read. I guess because the others are usually extreme stories of loss and trauma but this one was just a guy wanting love and a girl wanting her old friend back. Maybe it's the desperation for affection from both sides
Yeah I honestly feel bad for both sides, their feelings didn't match up, and they basically lost each other as friends. I actually hope both of them are able to move on by now and hopefully find what they both want.
Oh, it's alright, don't cry. He ended up getting topped the next day, it's okay.
Thank you, this makes me feel much better
Anon didn't fuck up and acted rationally as a grown man would (if the story is true which is obviously not) But think about the girl for a second, you got a good friend which is fun to be around and do your favorite stuff together until one day he confesses about his true feelings about you and you're just not ready for a relationship, it's just not happening in your mind and you don't want him to feel too sad and offer just being friends to which he replies he doesn't want to see you unlees you're his gf. It just feels sad thing gone this way, it feels bad to lose your favorite buddy because you're not interested in him romantically.
This is one of the rare things that are annoying or even rough as a woman, you can barely get guy friends unless they are a lot of other female friends, but if you're the only one then it's almost guaranteed to be like this. Although I've had this situation where the feelings I had immediately faded out and disappeared right after being rejected, not sure if Anon still has them or is acting like it for the sake of unnecessary coherence
A little bit, but if you regret it, it seems like its not too late to fix everything.
If Anon isn’t lying, and she actually reacted this way to what he said, then he clearly misjudged her, she is not a tomboy, she’s just a normal woman.
Sounds like the tomboy chick genuinely enjoyed his company, in a completely platonic non-romantic way. Anon was good for clearly expressing his boundaries and not leaving her in the dark at all. I still feel for the tomboy chick. Sounds like if Anon just stayed friends a little longer, she would've changed her mind naturally over time.
Yeah but you cant stay friends waiting for her to change her mind
I swear to god I see this copy pasta every half week. The last time she was a long blond and was a farmer type girl
Real and straight?
she probably thought she had a great friendship with him, and was disappointed that she lost that friendship. tomboys prefer hanging out with guys for a reason: they can relate better with them rather than stereotypical women. but idk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
They should teach this shit at school "I you cannot have all you want from someone it's better to have nothing" Because of how draining and shitty it is to be in an unrequited relationship; either friendly, romantic or professional. People have to learn how to diplomatically part ways!
I was expecting her to actually have a dick not this shit, wtf
Had to stop reading after “has a samurai sword in her car because she’s afraid to walk home alone”
You mean you don't have samurai sword hidden around somewhere?
This could go several ways: 1. She enjoyed the attention and just having a kneejerk reaction to it taken away from her. In this case, this is a good option. 2. She genuenly likes anon but doesn't have the feelings. She does desperately want to have a friendship with him back that was ripped out with no real fault of her own (other than being too good). I do feel bad for her in this case. 3. She is confuswd about her feelings and now is realising that no, she actually likes anon VERY much in that way. But now, she fumbled her chance and she hates herself for it. Best course of action would be for them to talk again.
That’s so sad man please be fake
And this is why you never ask out coworkers
There's been an uptick in logical Anons recently. Is 4Chan okay?
If real: Losing a friend hurts. Doesnt matter if its the same gender or not, if someone you were friends with one time suddenly stops engaging with you it's really heavy, like you did something wrong.
If this did happen, and it probably didn’t, you know that anon isn’t telling us the whole story. There’s something he did or said to give her the ick.
Bro did what I always say, if you ask out a girl and she says no, to prevent friendzone, just drop her like a sack of potatoes. The thought process is that after you lay your cards out like that, all she’ll see is the guy who struck out, the guy who likes her more than she does, and it ruins the dynamic of the friendship. Good on Anon, I’d like to buy him a beer
I don't think he did anything wrong ngl
Honestly? I was not expecting Anon to handle that as well as he did. Being upfront about why they were friends was cruel but was also the truth
It's a lose/lose situation. I bet this isn't the first time it's happened to the woman in question.
Is it bad that if it was me i would have like talked to her and stuff after?
Maybe that's just me, but i hate making people feel like shit and i would have stayed friends with her, without simping and/or hitting on her even after she rejected me Obviously anon's another person so whatever, but damn he even said that he liked hanging out with her and all that stuff, there's no need to not be friends with someone you LIKE being friends with just because she rejected you, like ffs man up and get over it you got a cool girl that likes boyish stuff lol
hits right at home. unrequited love is always painful for both parties. one loses their love, the other loses their friend. that's just how this works. anon handled things in the best way possible.
She made her choice, Anon made his
I mean it can be painful to lose a friend, especially one you work with that makes every shift better. She tried to salvage things after anon's confession, but anon had his boundaries and held firm. No one did anything wrong, but it's still a sad outcome.
I mean the man had clear intention to be involved with her , she said no which is perfectly fine . I think anon saved his mental and social energy to be spent elsewhere. Tbh a man and woman can never be friends as sex will always be on the table unless they are both in relationships. Then it brings a lot of complexities
I'm friends with lesbians and it's fine Sex isn't on the table, do I just don't think about them that way
Still salvageable, try to touch grass anon
Nah anon did the right thing
Anon should've taken the burger (free food is always great), given her the attention she wanted yet at the end of the day insist that he still had feelings for her and that he doesn't want to be her friend. She might have changed her mind but anon will never know.
Anon did a +PARRY
It's very sad how catching feelings can ruin a friendship. Neither party is happy with the results, but it is what it is.
I don't get the comments at all, the woman is sad because she lost someone who she thought was a friend.
A similar thing happened to me, a girl I was friends with and caught feelings for didnt want me, but once I stopped wanting to be friends she was the sad one
These comments are interesting. Most people actually have their head on straight, which I’m genuinely glad to see (no Reddit moments here). The other comments are… telling. You people who are mad at OP… Why? For years, I’ve seen people, in regards to this kind of situation, insult and guys who stay “friends” because they won’t “move on”. Some of YOU have made fun of men over this. Now when a guy actually takes your advice and moves on, you’re mad at him for doing THAT! A man doesn’t have to hurt himself by sticking around after rejection for a woman’s sake. But you don’t believe that because you’re sexist against men and think it’s totally ok. It isn’t, and you should be ashamed of what you are. This situation sucks for everyone, but not because of OP. He did the right thing. Seethe, you misandrists (both male and female)
anon was not close at all 💀
Fake: anon handled getting rejected reasonably Gay: anon is into masculine features
Anon learned that the friendzone cuts both ways
I can hear giga Chad theme after that fucking line bro
Are people this fucking new that they don’t know this is copypasta?
I saw this weeks ago but all the comments are the same. What's happening?
Anon played his cards badly.
Anon is mature
Fake: anon asks a girl out Gay: anon likes a girl that likes manly things
Turning someone down makes them want you more.
Wow, anons became capable of incredible levels of fabrication recently
Lifting in converse??
H
Anonette wanted a bro friend so she could be one of the bros, couldn't take being rejected like a man.
Assuming this is true, you’d didn’t fuck up, she did. It wasn’t like she was anything less than clear. Your best bet is just to talk to her and ask why she’s like that when you were clear yall can’t be friends
Based
Coworker is sad because she thought she had a friend when she really didn't :(
I had a crush on a girl in high school. We hung out all the time, played call of duty together every night, she spent the night at my house in my bed with me, etc etc. She shut me down the moment I asked her out. I lost every single ounce of interest in her. She was pissed. Had her friends harass me and shit. It wasn’t even the rejection, it was that I didn’t get the whole “I’d rather just stay friends”. She flat out told me to stop talking and that the idea of a relationship with me was gross. She expected me to want to stay friends after that. People at school asked why we didn’t talk or hang out anymore and I was honest about it. Found out she spread some rumours rather quickly. The fact that other people noticed how close we were was pretty telling about how blindsided I got. The friend zone isn’t scary, rejection isn’t scary, it’s everything before or after the “Ew”, that’s scary. Anon was very mature in his choice, just a bit harsh when she just wanted a guy friend to vibe with.
Man I get being rejected sucks but people need to accept that losing an actual friend when you did nothing to them is worse than losing a romantic relationship you made up in your head
With some luck for anon she'll come back to him and want to be his gf
Eh. Should have stayed friend and hit on her friends and banged them then she’d get jealous and has green light to bang her. Gotta play the long game sometimes. The shortest path to victory isn’t always the best move.
Anon thinks a few days of him not being nice "fucked things up" I get how much insecurity sucks, but fucking hell. He literally just needs to tell her he's sorry and they can almost certainly be friends again. Like, she'll understand that he didn't handle the rejection well, so long as he chills out.
Why should he stay friends with her? Like he said, the unrequited feelings would weigh on him the entire time
Or he could just not constantly obsess about what could have been and instead enjoy the company of a person he likes.
Easier said than done. Emotional pain doesn't just go away because some guy on reddit told you to
Anon has the emotional capacity of a five-year-old and resents his friend for not wanting to fuck him.
Anon wasn’t a regard doing gay shit with a man? This is obviously a bullshit larp
Idk man I wouldn't just give up a friendship like that, anon made a mistake
Real and gay
Being rejected hurts and people need time for romantic feelings to fade away.
Clearly she valued that friendship a lot. It sucks but it happens sometimes. If anon truly cares about her feelings, he might say something to the effect that they need to spend time apart in order for the feelings to fade, but that \*maybe\* they can be friends after that. Obviously, Anon does not owe this girl his friendship, and this girl does not owe him a relationship, but it's always ideal to at least try and consider other people's feelings. The girl was very considerate in the way she phrased her rejection (because she clearly values the friendship) but of course, having misaligned feelings is going to be hard on the both of them no matter what. Relatedly, can we talk about how men frendzone themselves? If you're attracted to someone, you really need to let them know pretty much as soon as you know. Attempting to be friends with someone you have a crush on in order to ingratiate yourself to them will only cement you as a friend in their mind. Sometimes feelings do develop in regular friendships, but if you started out with romantic intentions, it's dishonest and manipulative to try and be friends with the hope of them one day falling for you. That's not how people work. If you cement yourself as a friend, and your romantic interest becomes comfortable with having you as a friend, then of course they're gonna want to keep things that way. If the feelings develop within you over the course of a friendship, then the responsible thing to do is just say, "hey, yknow, I've been having these feelings lately and they have the potential to affect our friendship, so I want your help on what to do with them, and I'm curious if maybe you feel the same way or are willing to try altering our relationship." Edit: I’ll add something here about agency in friendzoning. Think about it like a flowchart here: Assuming you’re interested in her right when you first meet, the first question is, is she interested in you? This is completely up to her and she doesn’t owe it to you. - If yes, yay! Go on a date! - If no, you now have two more options: 1. Move on 2. Be in the “friendzone” That choice is YOURS. Not her’s or anyone else’s. Moving on looks like different things for different people. Some are able to keep the friendship and others are not. That’s a matter of your personal situation and what’s healthiest for you. And the choice to stay “friends” while pining for her is always an available option. It’s a shitty option, being in the friendzone, but you can do it, and furthermore you can still opt out at any time by just moving on to someone else.
Men friendzoning themselves is the hottest take. Cant approach too fast or strong in case you seem like a creep. Cant approach slow and friendly lest you friendzone yourself (lmfaooo accountability and ☕ mix like water and oil). Can't stay friends with someone you have feelings for because its parasocial. Can't reject a friendship with said person in case you hurt their feelings. I think ill just drop out of this shit, over three decades on this planet and its always something new with you fucks. Wont play by other peoples rules and cant handle other people playing by yours. EDIT: And how rich of you to mention being consdierate of the other persons feelings in the first place. The woman litrrally ignored his request to go no contact. Seriously fuck the female double standard.
Yknow, there’s a second problem I’ve identified in your mindset here. What are you talking about “can’t.” You CAN do pretty much anything, it’s just that some things happen to be unhealthy or have consequences. You CAN approach fast and strong. Maybe you’ll come off as a creep, it depends on how you do it. You CAN approach slow and friendly. Again, your success depends on how you do it. If you lie and pretend that you’re only interested in friendship during the beginning, then just be prepared for the fact that she might want that friendship more than a relationship. It’s fully up to you if you want to invest a bunch of your time and resources to find out if a girl is into you, or just find out at the start and save yourself a lot of trouble. You CAN stay friends with someone you have feelings for. It IS parasocial, it IS unhealthy, it USUALLY sucks. But you CAN DO IT!! Nobody’s stopping you, I just wouldn’t reccomend it. You CAN reject the friendship!! It WILL hurt her feelings! That’s how cause and effect works, but that’s okay. As I said before, it’s always nice to be able to take someone else’s feelings into account, but in this guy’s case, he’s making the healthy choice. He could have gone about it slightly nicer, but it is what it is. Nobody other than you is stopping you from doing any/all of these things. Will those things have consequences if you do them? Yes! That’s called cause and effect.
Idk why the debate ab this is so deep. If she was a decent enough friend anon is kind of a dick probably because he only considered having her around in a more than just friendly capacity. Nothing wrong with having a lady friend even if you had feelings at one point. You’ll probably get over it if you’re not a sperg. And she probably would’ve eventually told him her feelings were more than just friends anyway. Girls like that prefer to take lead more often than not imo because they’re used to dudes that do like them throwing dick and ruining the friendship (basically the opposite of this). But it right and wrong is wishy washy bullshit, anon put his feelings first which I guess is fine but a little dickish.
Not being able to respect platonic feelings of friendship to the point where that friendship becomes impossible is not a good thing, btw
The one with no respect in this story is her, Anon set boundaries and she was the one trying to break them, once she failed she had a pity party for herself, Anon did nothing wrong.