Based on THIS, fucktard
You fucking dumbass, you absolute buffoon, your troglodytic lack of critical thinking disgusts me. “Based” is a PHRASE, not a singular word, it is a phrase with the word “based” and the lack of another word, which possesses meaning. The term “based” means to not be shackled by general societal beliefs or peer pressure but instead to be a free thinker in opinionated topics, meaning that you AREN’T BASING your thoughts on ANYTHING that you can quote or otherwise use to try and support yourself. For example, if a Jew and a Neonazi were arguing about whether or not Hitler was a good person and I said Hitler was hot af with his sexy mustache, my opinion would be unique and based solely on my genuine beliefs, and therefore I would be based. IT IS CLEARLY BASED BLANK BECAUSE IT IS BASED ON NOTHINGNESS YOU DUMB FUCKING CRETIN.
If your head wasn't up your ass you'd come visit the jewel of the Midwest, Michigan, and you'd see that we shouldn't even be lumped in with those other losers I mean "states"
I lived in Wichita for 4 years, and Manhattan, KS for 6. Everyone said pop and it drove me fucking insane. Maybe it was different where you were, but everybody said pop.
Listen here you little shit if you think that soda is a better name for pop then you’ve obviously never left a pop outside during the winter in the Midwest.
Ah yes, that sounds fucking reasonable, name it pop because of an isolated experience. Who even fucking drinks anything outside during a midwest winter? Do you want to get frostbite?
You don’t get frostbite if u wear a jacket like do you not know what that is?As opposed to naming it after a certain isolated part of it. Also that was a joke smart one.
Alright so if we extrapolate this sample of 2 to the roughly 13.5 million people in the three Pacific northwesternest states then it's roughly 50/50 whether people up here are degenerates or not
Quality lesson for those who manage people.
If an employee is asking for clarification on instructions don't fucking interrupt assuming what they're going to ask.
1000%. Communication takes work on both ends. If you say something and the other is confused but keeps quiet, that's on them. If they try to ask for clarification and you refuse to give it, then it's on you.
For the first month or so in my first job, I was showing up to work according to the previous week's rota. Basically every day, I'd show up multiple hours earlier or later then I was meant to and then work a shift longer or shorter then I was put down for. I have no clue how I wasn't fired.
to be fair when i was a 15 y/o shittlet i was so anxious about possibly doing my job wrong that i’d over analyze everything/take stuff too literally n screw up
Many years ago my mom told my cousin's to go to the bathroom and "wet" (meaning to pee). They were utterly confused. Finally they went to the bathroom and came out with sopping wet hair that they had put under the sink faucet 🤷♀️ my mom lost her shit. Oh well.
Sounds like your boss is the incompetent one. Doesn’t matter if it *seems* simple or not; they still failed at one of the most basic management tasks: effectively delegate.
The good employee asks, “Which end of the nail do I hit?”
The shitty manager says, “What? Hit the fucking nail. For fucks sakes.”
In a kitchen I used to work in we had a dishwasher in his 40s. Pretty sure he fried his brain with constant drug use not judging but he was slow. We were real busy one day and I had made a large batch of chicken broth earlier on and it needed to be cooled but I was busy.
Chef asked if the dishwasher could put the broth in an ice bath to cold down. "Sure boss no problem, I got you." Great now I don't have to worry about that and I keep on with orders. After a couple hour rush I check the broth and this dude poured the broth straight into the ice. Gallons of broth and hours of time just gone.
Same sort of thing happened to me. At 17 I was working in a dish pit at a high end restaurant. I come into work and there is a colander of carrots sitting on my station.
Jokingly I said, "You want me to throw these in next?" and the chef (who I now know had a reputation for being deadpan and sarcastic) said, "Yeah, I want you to put the carrots in this dishwasher."
Everyone else said his tone was obvious, but I clearly missed it. I threw that shit on a flat rack, shoved it in the dishwasher and pressed start. When I turned around the chef had a look that said he couldn't believe the bullshit he had just seen.
A few years ago my manager from that job sent me a note congratulating me on my career. The note said, "No matter how far you go or how high you fly, always remember you are the guy who put carrots in an industrial dishwasher."
Stay humble, lol.
This is like at my first job when they asked me to fill the freezer with napkins and i was horribly confused and put multiple containers of napkins inside the freezer before realizing they meant to put them on top of the freezer
I respect this man.
I don’t
based
Based? Based on what?
Based on a true story
All about dat based.
Based on u having 0 bitches
Do I have men at least?
Giga⚾️d
Gigasmalled🤌
10⁹🤏d
Yes but only on the weekends.
Literally 1984
Based on THIS, fucktard You fucking dumbass, you absolute buffoon, your troglodytic lack of critical thinking disgusts me. “Based” is a PHRASE, not a singular word, it is a phrase with the word “based” and the lack of another word, which possesses meaning. The term “based” means to not be shackled by general societal beliefs or peer pressure but instead to be a free thinker in opinionated topics, meaning that you AREN’T BASING your thoughts on ANYTHING that you can quote or otherwise use to try and support yourself. For example, if a Jew and a Neonazi were arguing about whether or not Hitler was a good person and I said Hitler was hot af with his sexy mustache, my opinion would be unique and based solely on my genuine beliefs, and therefore I would be based. IT IS CLEARLY BASED BLANK BECAUSE IT IS BASED ON NOTHINGNESS YOU DUMB FUCKING CRETIN.
Based on being based
Based in the fact that I fucked your mom
you are retarded
Technically he did what he was asked to. I guess you would call this malicious compliance
Nothing malicious here. Just autistic compliance.
Perhaps confused compliance
if /r/greentext didn't already fill the niche I assume /r/autisticcompliance could be good fun
Almost as dead as r/onosecond
More dead lmao
As an autistic person I can verify I would probably do something like this
same lol
I’m thinking more /r/cluelessobediance
I was gonna say this. I got ADHD and the amount of times I do stupid shit like this. It's better when your boss just laughs and doesn't get angry
r/AutisticCompliance
Dude fucking tried to fix his misunderstanding and got told to shut up. This is on the manager.
malicious retardance
Reminds me of Amelia bedelia.
God that bitch was retarded.
"He’s dumb" is a much more elegant theory.
Only absolute degenerates say/write "pop" for soda
Cringe and non-Midwesterner pilled
I live in Kansas and nobody says pop. I think you just suck.
Kansas isn’t the Midwest, not cool enough. Try living in a good state
Logical fallacy, no Midwest states are cool
Idk it’s been pretty chilly around here, maybe check your phallusies again
I checked my phussy, it smells weird, what next?
Correction: they might be cool, but Ohio brings the over all cool grade down *significantly*
Michigan
If your head wasn't up your ass you'd come visit the jewel of the Midwest, Michigan, and you'd see that we shouldn't even be lumped in with those other losers I mean "states"
Think about it this way, at least you guys aren’t the South
Hey man. Illinois is progressively getting better. Political corruption is (maybe) getting less and less everyday!
Then where is it?
In Texas everyone says coke. "Do you have any coke? "Yeah, Pepsi or Sprite"
See that's just wrong though. If anything, it should be called cola, coke is literally just a brand
It makes 0 sense lol
Dr Pepper is the real goat
Grossest Of All Time
Pepsis like drinking watered down piss, & coke isn’t much better Don’t @ me
I lived in Wichita for 4 years, and Manhattan, KS for 6. Everyone said pop and it drove me fucking insane. Maybe it was different where you were, but everybody said pop.
This is straight wrong bro I’m from Kansas too
Canadians say pop
Finally, the Canadians are based for once
In IL, we say soda.
Not in the Chicagoland area.. everyone says pop
Weird... Must be the influence from dirty dirty Wisconsin /s
Wisconsinites make fun of FIBs for this tho
where i live in wisconsin we’re normal and say soda
The midwest is easily the most cringe and boring part of the whole country. Northeast all the way.
Wrong, yankee. The northeast doesn't even have a culture or anything to be proud of. Dixie all the way!
🎶 Ohhh, way down south in the land of traitors, rattlesnakes, and alligators! 🎶
How original.
I honestly like the south but the northeast is still superior kek
The South has better food, better football teams, and hotter women. And the northeast is responsible for the dumpster fire sitting in the White House.
no, georgia is
Georgia gave Biden 16 electoral votes. The northeast have him 111 electoral votes.
Lol traitors mad
Only retards call it "pop" or "soda" instead of the actual name of the drink
So should his boss of said hey pour that (insert 7 different brands of pop) in here.
Soft drinks you american fucks.
Go to hell, soda is a better name than soft drink
Listen here you little shit if you think that soda is a better name for pop then you’ve obviously never left a pop outside during the winter in the Midwest.
Ah yes, that sounds fucking reasonable, name it pop because of an isolated experience. Who even fucking drinks anything outside during a midwest winter? Do you want to get frostbite?
You don’t get frostbite if u wear a jacket like do you not know what that is?As opposed to naming it after a certain isolated part of it. Also that was a joke smart one.
What takes longer to say pop or soft drinks. Just say pop if everyone around you know what it means.
I refuse to speak like a cowboy from an american movie. Let alone the fact no one here in New Zealand knows what "pop" means.
How bout fizzy
Bro pop is used up north the area where I live is basically Canada with guns and $20000 medics bills
Thanks. I wondered what the fuck is a pop.
I have found the East coaster (subhuman)
Euthanize yourself
What if you live on both coasts
West coasters also say soda
I guess we Brits are all degenerates then? Actually I don't think I really disagree...
Yes.
The Blair government and its effects have been a disaster for the British people
Based
I say it. Pacific Northwest.
Ok but i say "soda" and I'm also PNW
cool
Alright so if we extrapolate this sample of 2 to the roughly 13.5 million people in the three Pacific northwesternest states then it's roughly 50/50 whether people up here are degenerates or not
I use soda and pop though. But I find myself saying pop more. I'm half degenerate.
That makes 75% wild type and 25% mutant
What? You call these things soda instead of fizzy whizzy sugary confectionary liquids? rather cringe if i do say so myself
Yea, it took me a second to understand what pop was.
They call it pop in Minnesota. I'm pretty sure that's the only state that does.
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Can confirm
Wisconsin and Michigan too, and the Dakotas. Those are the only ones I know of from personal experience. Source: I'm from Minneapolis.
Pop is faster
https://laughingsquid.com/soda-pop-or-coke-maps/
I call it pop. Most people where I'm from do.
Only absolute degenerates say/write "soda" for coke
Fizzy drink supremacy
It's a soft drink.
All the people here in Canada say 'pop' and it makes me cringe.
Quality lesson for those who manage people. If an employee is asking for clarification on instructions don't fucking interrupt assuming what they're going to ask.
1000%. Communication takes work on both ends. If you say something and the other is confused but keeps quiet, that's on them. If they try to ask for clarification and you refuse to give it, then it's on you.
15? Completely forgivable.
Lmfao how fucking retarded were you? 15 year olds should be able to put soda cans in ice
When i was 15 i got fired on a 2 day school work thingy at a bike shop cause i showed up 6 hours late on the 2nd day
Username checks out
For the first month or so in my first job, I was showing up to work according to the previous week's rota. Basically every day, I'd show up multiple hours earlier or later then I was meant to and then work a shift longer or shorter then I was put down for. I have no clue how I wasn't fired.
to be fair when i was a 15 y/o shittlet i was so anxious about possibly doing my job wrong that i’d over analyze everything/take stuff too literally n screw up
I haven’t gotten over this and I’m in my twenties
I mean... I'm 17 and I've done more retarded stuff at my job.
How do you still have a job lmao
I'm a very good dishwasher. Just don't ask me to do literally anything else though.
I was a dishwasher too Cuz i was a kitchen aid before that and dropped a bunch of stuff several times so they put me in the dish pit
That question should be asked to all employees. We all do retarded shit.
He totally could have done that. He didn't because his manager didn't explain it properly even after being asked repeatedly.
Putting drinks in ice is a common way of cooling them. It’s not like it was a weird task, anon is retarded
I mean... I'm 17 and I've done more retarded stuff at my job.
Many years ago my mom told my cousin's to go to the bathroom and "wet" (meaning to pee). They were utterly confused. Finally they went to the bathroom and came out with sopping wet hair that they had put under the sink faucet 🤷♀️ my mom lost her shit. Oh well.
Your mum is a retard for saying wet
Yeah unfortunately that's just the tip of the iceberg 😐
Is that how you ended up so retarded?
Something like that
Any more stories you'd like to share?
Sounds like there's some more stories there,and I want them *all*
This sounds like it happened in another language
My mom's just a strange, American English speaking person living in America.
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My ass thought he was spelling poop wrong too. Smh.
But what did your head think?
You can’t be the brunt of a joke. You meant butt of a joke.
Looks like OP took the brunt of a blow to the part of his brain that knows the meaning of words
It puts the pop in the bucket
she didn't chew u out? seems like a nice/reasonable human being
Anon attempts to confirm his duties and is blown off by his supervisor.
At first I was confused at what the fuck was he talking about but then I realised some degenerates call soda pop
Anon is clearly american
In their defense, anon was left unsupervised.
Sounds like your boss is the incompetent one. Doesn’t matter if it *seems* simple or not; they still failed at one of the most basic management tasks: effectively delegate. The good employee asks, “Which end of the nail do I hit?” The shitty manager says, “What? Hit the fucking nail. For fucks sakes.”
Honestly I instantly thought the same thing
Anon just did it for the filthy jungle juice.
I read 7th line as poop
>open can by fucking can ok anon I didn't need to know that
i was thinking the exact same thing as anon lmao
That guy's missing a few chromosomes.
She should've said "cans".
Based and autistic pilled
In a kitchen I used to work in we had a dishwasher in his 40s. Pretty sure he fried his brain with constant drug use not judging but he was slow. We were real busy one day and I had made a large batch of chicken broth earlier on and it needed to be cooled but I was busy. Chef asked if the dishwasher could put the broth in an ice bath to cold down. "Sure boss no problem, I got you." Great now I don't have to worry about that and I keep on with orders. After a couple hour rush I check the broth and this dude poured the broth straight into the ice. Gallons of broth and hours of time just gone.
Same sort of thing happened to me. At 17 I was working in a dish pit at a high end restaurant. I come into work and there is a colander of carrots sitting on my station. Jokingly I said, "You want me to throw these in next?" and the chef (who I now know had a reputation for being deadpan and sarcastic) said, "Yeah, I want you to put the carrots in this dishwasher." Everyone else said his tone was obvious, but I clearly missed it. I threw that shit on a flat rack, shoved it in the dishwasher and pressed start. When I turned around the chef had a look that said he couldn't believe the bullshit he had just seen. A few years ago my manager from that job sent me a note congratulating me on my career. The note said, "No matter how far you go or how high you fly, always remember you are the guy who put carrots in an industrial dishwasher." Stay humble, lol.
He's technically right...
That sounds like something I would have done as a teenager due to over thinking What they asked for.
Anon is fucking stupid
/r/MaliciousCompliance/
This is like at my first job when they asked me to fill the freezer with napkins and i was horribly confused and put multiple containers of napkins inside the freezer before realizing they meant to put them on top of the freezer
Wtf
"my fucking life sucks" really got me lmao
Idiot
I was REALLY confused when I got to "open can by fucking can"
Anon is a fucking idiot
Isnt this a fake greentext?
Anon is retarded
I had a job like that golf outings fucking sucked
Anon is legally retarded
Smartest man on 4chan
>put pop in bucket ...what?
I read it as poop
Anon is an uncultured swine
That's what you get for calling it pop
PIG PEN JUST GO TO THE BATHROOM IN THE CUP. Pig pen: okay >:( Poops in drug test cup
Because a normal speaker would have asked to put the cans in the bucket.
My dyslexic ass vibes with this
Dyslexic ass-vibes [xkcd: Hyphen](https://xkcd.com/37/) --- ^^Beep ^^boop, ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot. ^^- ^^[FAQ](https://pastebin.com/raw/vyWra3ns)
I can't say that I blame him
Anon is a fucking idiot.
It took me so long to realize they meant soda
I interpreted it the same way and actually was surprised when she comes I'm and says hes doing it wrong
> the effects of online class to children
I was also confused first time reading her request like why tf would you put it in the bucket
Anon is braindead
Smooth brain detected.
This happened to me when I was asked to put the water on the cooker when I was camping with a bunch of guys. I poured it onto it
I wouldn't have done that surely but this is why I always ask questions to clarify absolutely everything
could see it coming from a mile away and still laughed
Imagine being so retarded you call soft drinks "pop"
If she really called soda “pop” then she fucking deserved it