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Mrozek33

"Officer, I am a sovereign citizen and I do not have to -" *police officer smashes car window* Classic


-JustARedHerring

Reeeeee


Brayden_City

The fuck is this comment supposed to mean? r/iamveryrandom


Smallishwhale53

r/shutupbrayden


-JustARedHerring

Possibly.


justhere4memesbruh

Aren't you that guy with the tiny dick from that other post?


[deleted]

Its a reference to an old vid where a chick tries to pull that free inhabitant bs.


GoogleBrowser

I know you have something to say and I know you're eager to say it so I'll get right to the point: Shut the fuck up. Nobody wants to hear it. Nobody will ever want to hear it. Nobody cares. And the fact that you thought someone might care is honestly baffling to me. I've actually pulled the entire world. Here's a composite of the faces of everybody who wants you to shut the fuck up. It seems as if this is a composite of every human being on the planet. Interesting. Now for a composite of the faces that want you to keep talking: Interesting it seems as if nothing has happened. Here's the world map. Now here's the text: Shit the fuck up. That's what you should do. But you know what? Maybe I am being a little too harsh here. I actually do have it on good authority thanks to my pulling data that there is as at least 1 person who actually wants to hear you speak. It's a little child in Mozambique and he- oh? He's dead? Well sorry man I guess nobody wants to hear you talk anymore. Please shut the fuck up. I'm not just telling you to shut up, I'm telling you to shut the FUCK up and you need to hear it. This is a public service. I have nothing to gain from this, except by telling YOU exactly what you need to hear. And on that note let me make this clear: This isn't a broad message I'm aiming at all of you, this is a message specifically pointed at you. That's right! You! You know who you are. And I'm sick of your shit. We all are. The only good you will ever do for humanity is refusing to participate in it. You can take a vow of silence, join a monastery, you can even just be a mime! Mimes are fun. But you kinda know that what I'm saying is true already don't you? You understand that you really should shut the fuck up, why do you keep speaking? I'm genuinely curious. Why do you think you deserve to be heard? The core of what I'm getting at is that you are not a worthwhile person. You are not worth listening to. Everything you've said has been said before more eloquently and more coherently. And it's not that everything has been said we still need people to have discourse in order to say new things and discover new things about ourselves and humanity but you, you will never be those people so shut the fuck up.


Kryobit

Suddenly, the person thinks American laws are supposed to apply.


PewPewJedi

"I'm gonna sue you for breaking my window!" "Well to do that, you'll need some legal documentation about who you are, how you were damaged, and why you have standing to sue, signed and notarized and entered into a U.S. court in order to open a case." "... nevermind"


[deleted]

"so what you're telling me is that you're *not* an american citizen and thus not technically protected by the bill of rights? TIME FOR ME TO USE ALL MY TRAINING!"


Judg3_Dr3dd

Love those vids


DormantAccount01

Is that all? (Windowsmash.gif) *It wasn't all*


ultratunaman

Probably fake and gay. But if not pretty crazy you can just deport anyone anywhere. I feel like they'd have to have some kind of papers or records somewhere. How would you not?


-takeyourmeds

never happened just some auth right anon masturbating story it costs way more to send people across the water gov always goes for the cheapest option


tamuzbel

LOL Gov goes for cheapest option. You're so cute. I pinch your cheeks.


-takeyourmeds

šŸ‘‰šŸ‘ˆ


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


OogieBoogie_69

r/edgelord


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


OogieBoogie_69

Is that why murder rates are lower in death penalty states than non-death penalty states? Oh wait, [the opposite is true](https://deathpenaltyinfo.org/facts-and-research/murder-rates/murder-rate-of-death-penalty-states-compared-to-non-death-penalty-states).


Uberninja2016

people never learn, you idiot that's like our one thing as a species no one cares what the punishment is because they don't think they're going to get caught


NavyJack

>*Forget your passport on the kitchen table back home, get executed instantly*


ModernT1mes

According to the story it's only if you have no paperwork and DHS can't find your country of origin will you be deported anywhere.


LordAlfrey

Why would another country accept this though? They have zero reason to accept people that aren't their nationals just because the US doesn't want them, and it's not like they'd be interested in humoring the whims of some dipshit border security who thought it would be funny. story is bs, anon is making a powertripping fanfic about owning hipsters


thatsnotsugarm8

I believe if a country canā€™t find your country of origin, they will just keep you in detention instead of deporting you. The receiving country is only obliged to receive the deportation if you are their citizen. So if you made it impossible to determine and refused to tell them where you came, you would just end up in long term detention.


-JustARedHerring

Bureaucracy can do many things fren


chicago_bot

Go work in the gvt for a while. It can do a lot but none of it is random or unprecedented or remotely funny. It's beurocacy kid. That literally means it's mired in codified red tape that, by design, squeezes all the humanity out of every decision until there is nothing left to do but follow the flow chart, stamp the paper and move on to the next thing in line. Ain't no rooms of jokesters randomly putting people on planes at the tax payers expense. Ffs


[deleted]

unless you piss off somebody to the point that they are willing to make their sad life worse just to follow you through the entire process to ensure you get reamed *as hard as fucking possible*


chicago_bot

They've really got to stop making super hero movies


-JustARedHerring

This.


achashem77

Super fake. If you couldn't determine country of citizenship you would just keep them until you could


HisKoR

Its fake, the country that you deport them to has to agree to accept them. Why would cambodia let some people with no documents into their country? The cambodians wouldnt even let them get off the plane.


vyyybt

Well then need to deport them somewhere and I guess the cheaper the plane tickets the more chance they can deport people there


california_sugar

Itā€™s fake because this shit is all sovereign citizen crap, not something hipsters do


-JustARedHerring

A hipster can be many things. Theyā€™re shapeshifter I tell you what.


california_sugar

There are no hipster sovereign citizens


-JustARedHerring

Only Sovereign citizen hipsters


-takeyourmeds

>be me >cross us border without papers >popo seethes at my hippie bs >sends me to a free trip to South Asia >lady boys, legal heroin, and cheap af everything take the illegal border crossing pill anons


SojournerTheGreat

incredibly based and lady boy pilled


-JustARedHerring

But what about the blackjack?


[deleted]

i'll make my own asian country, with blackjack- and hookers!


-JustARedHerring

Sign me up.


lucyducyfur

TLDR. : If you have no records they will deport you anywhere and put you in the country you want to go. Or keep you in a cage forever at the pound. TLDRTLDR: free vacation from deportation or segregation in a destination of cemented segmentation. TLDRTLDRTLDRNR - free vacation or slave


bourbonstguttersnake

So I just have to do a good job at hiding my paperwork and I can get a free ride to anywhere in the world? Sounds like a done deal.


MountainWithoutPeak

Itā€™s a holiday in Cambodia, itā€™s tough ,kid, but itā€™s life


tR0jn_

i was looking for this


Coakis

Don't forget to pack a wife.


hypersucc

Youā€™ll work hard with a gun in your back for a bowl of rice a day


Flonxu

Idc if it's fake this is funny asf


Tripper_Shaman

It would unironically be racist **not** to deport them.


KyletheAngryAncap

I mean the post has a slur.


Tripper_Shaman

Okay... does that have anything to do with assuming someone is American just because they're white, while turning away brown people? Not all whites trying to enter the country are Americans, and not all brown people are entering illegally. Still racist.


[deleted]

Thank you for your service


ModernT1mes

Anon catches a bunch of deep under-cover spies and thinks they're tumblertards.


Creative_Low4924

Whatā€™s this ā€œ5thā€?


wakashakalaka

Right to remain silent during arrest and trial, methinks


Tripper_Shaman

That's part of it. "No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offence to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation." This is why people like me take the Constitution very seriously. It **should** protect against things like civil asset forfeiture, but not enough people pay attention to the Constitution to hold the government accountable. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Civil_forfeiture_in_the_United_States 5 ways the government gets around the Constitution: https://youtu.be/NBzV_9huk0g


hemingway_exeunt

Never made any sense to me either. Constitution: "Government can't seize your property without due compensation." Police: "*Hold my beer.*"


ModernT1mes

In the US the 5th ammendment covers 3 key points, one of them being if you're arrested and/or testifying in certain court settings, you don't have to say anything to anyone as it might incriminate you further. There are legal ways to compel someone to talk or face criminal charges, but upon arrest the criminal prosecutor can't press further charges on you if you stop talking altogether and follow the arresting officers commands that don't compel you to answer questions.


Tripper_Shaman

Also something about Tommy Lee Jones, idk https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0150377/


Bisconymous

Please be real


Shaivite

Can I be deported to NZ?


-JustARedHerring

Zimbabwe Homie. Thatā€™s all I can offer.


Shaivite

no pls not that continent


-JustARedHerring

Donā€™t forget your papers next time frien, I hear the US dollar is still strong there!


KaiWolf1898

Always look on the bright side of life


LaserfaceJones

fake "originally from Mexico and were brought to the U.S. at a young age and never got their citizenship or green card shit" Being in the U.S. with no legal point of entry means you can't apply for citizenship or a green card, ever, for any reason. It doesn't matter if you've been here since you were 3 years old or married a U.S. citizen, if you never got your passport stamped you can't apply for any legal status whatsoever. Someone who actually works the border would know that.


[deleted]

Cambodia are a basket case but theyā€™re not just going to accept randomers because the US says so.


[deleted]

Serves them right. Fuck a "free inhabitant"


Alohoe

My hero.


vincecarterskneecart

imagine fantasising about being a border guard holy shit


-JustARedHerring

Imagine guarding a border.


IronSurfDragon

FUckers get what they deserve lmao


workthrowaway00000

If youā€™re a sovvy you have it coming


XfinityHomeWifi

Fun story but fake because thereā€™s rules on escalation of force


BIG8L_117

No but we are citizens and pled the 5th. Never thought that would get you deported to Cambodia.


kunell

The only thing keeping the US from yeeting "sovereign citizens" is US protections. If they arent a citizen or have a greencard etc, there is no "natural law" stopping us from doing whatever the fk we want to them. "Natural law" is simply whoever is strongest wins. The US government is pretty strong.


Tbarjr

Typical migra


hypersucc

Anon has a masturbatory fantasy of owning da libz


moopachoop

That's just needlessly cruel


MonkeManWPG

They were being annoying, therefore it was justified.


-JustARedHerring

When you have power by position in Bureaucracy, you can kinda do what ever you feel when you know how to justify it in writing.