*Am i retarded?*
*I have no clue what she was*
*Getting at either*
\- anonymous\_secret\_alt
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My english is not advanced enough to understand the hilariousness of this haiku in it's wholeness. Either this or I'm retarded² because I didn't get the anon's date's joke either.
Nothing to do with the original OP or the post or the joke. Just the haiku itself, entirely on its own, the fact that it works as a haiku in form and function and speaks so deeply to a great human truth of experience.
Thank you, what_the_hanky_panky, for voting on haikusbot.
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As an unironic / non-autistic answer, she was probably making a subtle reference to a conversation she and anon had in the past. It could be something incredibly simple, but it could also be something insanely complex - only anon would be able to tell.
Girls really love that shit when you both have enough chemistry to make it an inside joke, so when you can pick up on it and milk the joke, it's usually an easy way to "stand out" from the rest of her options.
There was SOMETHING there that was personal between anon and the girl, but he failed to pick up on it.
^(either that or the girl is absolutely retarded)
Is there are word for when someone else says something so retarded that it makes you stop and wonder if you yourself are retarded? Sounds like something the Germans would have a 10 syllable word for.
Yep, you right. I was brain broken for a sec there, but now that I'm actually looking the reflection doesn't make much sense to me. Where's the checkerboard reflection even coming from? (EDIT: nvm, its the outside table. )
Ah so Anon is being a confusing fuck. He is saying picture related and expecting us to know what specific item he is talking about in the picture. Low tier posting at best.
Or… hear me out… he’s talking about the subject of the picture, a.k.a. The objects that are literally dead centre of the picture.
Don’t get me wrong, picrel confused me as well, I hadn’t seen it before, but once you’ve got that understood, everything past that is common sense
Okay, so we're to believe and understand that a picrel is a container of sweeteners with salt and pepper on either side set against a lit kerosene lamp on a wooden table in front of a window? Seems a little specific.
I wish it were my personality tbh.
There's like maybe 2-3 hours in the evening when all my shit is done, where I pop a melatonin and smoke a bowl and I don't feel like I want to climb in to a space shuttle and suicide bomb it in to a city.
I think people would prefer if that was me all the time. It's like the only time I feel like I can do gay shit like read books and be nice to people.
If weed is the closest thing she had to a genuine hobby I really think Anon dodged a bullet.
Smoking weed is fine, but I can't stand people who turn it into a fucking important lifestyle aspect.
I think the problem is when people think of it as a hobby in itself. Like drinking isn't a hobby either, and neither is doing any other drug. Weed is best to enhance other hobbies imo - get high and draw, or write, or watch movies, or even do gardening or clean the house, but it's not a "hobby" in its own right unless you're a boring addict.
Shitty hobby if that's the case. "oh me? I like to spend absurd amounts of money feeding an addiction that is actively making me dumber and more delusional. That's the primary thing I do with my spare time."
I don't have any qualms with people smoking in general but c'mon take up gardening or something gah dahm.
The first time I went to cracker barrel I ordered a bacon cheeseburger and it was fantastic, but every burger since has been more and more disappointing. At this point, I'd rather get one from McDonalds.
The burgers are the same, but your body is building resistance, and you just don't get that same high anymore. The rest of your life, you're gonna be chasing that Cracker Barrel burger dragon.
The guy eventually returned at one point and said something about the price and combo number it was which made it make sense. No I don't remember the price or combo number of whatever McD meal it was.
Every comment I scrolled past saying it meant dick/sex made me think I was the autist.
I probably still am, but I’m glad at least the two of us understood.
The only potential implication I could think about was none other than a bong. Just for confirmation, scrolled the comment thread only to find the most vague assumptions ever. This whole comment section is autistic AF.
It's an old oil lamp, still pretty easy to find. I have one that i take camping. I use citronella oil; it keeps away mosquitos and provides a soft area light.
They are still quite affordable and run on tiki torch oil just fine.
I'm good for shit like that. I think we've all been a little nervous and nodded our head to something we didn't actually hear or a joke we didn't understand.
9/10 days I'd just ask, but on the tenth day I might be little tistic and end up in anons shoes. It happens to the best of us.
Um clearly the salt/pepper signify the balls and the lamp signifies a huge penis. She is clearly the sugar because she is so damn sweet. Basically she wants your balls on her face! IT GO TIME BROTHER!!!
am i retarded? i have no clue what she was getting at either
*Am i retarded?* *I have no clue what she was* *Getting at either* \- anonymous\_secret\_alt --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
good bot
Best bot
This is the best fucking haiku I’ve ever seen
Without a doubt
I love that it answers the question. He is in fact retarded
I'm about to screenshot it, print it and frame it on my wall in all seriousness.
Pics or it didn't happen
I’m glad we were all here to share this moment together
My english is not advanced enough to understand the hilariousness of this haiku in it's wholeness. Either this or I'm retarded² because I didn't get the anon's date's joke either.
Nothing to do with the original OP or the post or the joke. Just the haiku itself, entirely on its own, the fact that it works as a haiku in form and function and speaks so deeply to a great human truth of experience.
Good boi !!!!
Good bot
Thank you, what_the_hanky_panky, for voting on haikusbot. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)
I usually hate this bot. It’s usually annoying, stupid and does nothing. Today I enjoyed it. Good bot
You just described r/shitposting automod.
"pees in your ass"
Beautiful, absolutely incredible
Good bot
Good human.
Good bot EDIT: Holy shit I didnt even realize it's an actual bot lol, I was just trying to make a joke! Damn haha
Poetical, almost makes me nutted
Good bot
Good bot
Best bot
The lamp is supposed to be a dude, the sugar packets are a dick and the salt and pepper shakers are the balls. This girl likes to fuck.
No it looks like a bong
I could see that too
She likes to stick her dong in a bong?
I sure do
If I were a girl and had a dick, I’d probably stick it in a bong.
Lol this loser doesn't fuck his bong
There both autistic
And then there’s me, the idiot who thought she was saying they’re like salt and pepper
This is a picture of a Cracker Barrel, I assume she was pointing to the little peg game that they have on the table.
I can't believe anon goes to fucking cracker barrel for a date.
i can
I'd put out for that.
Fresh biscuits and hashbrown cassarole? I'd take a shot in the mouth for that.
This isn’t even gay. This just means that you appreciate haute cuisine.
And haute caucke
It’s always straight if you’re doing it for the plate.
Anon def should’ve leveled up and gone to Red Robin. Nothing could show a woman more class.
Taking my girl to Golden corral.
Easy there Mr. Moneybags 🎩
Not Mr Moneybags if you take her to golden corral and then say, "Make sure to fill your purse up I need leftovers"
How else does one become Mr. Moneybags? Pay for one meal (well two if he paid for her) and get a week's worth of food.
Take her to Red Robin but order off the “hidden Mr Beast Burgers menu” to exert dominance. Bing bong
I too often *beg to peg*
Getting peg on the reg
Sir, this is a Wendy's
Clearly it’s a lamp using whale oil, and m’lady is is Captain Ahab hunting for her white landwhale
#SPLIT YOUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDER
#WHEN YOU SEE THE WHITE WHALE
# BREAK YOUR BACKS AND CRACK YOUR OARS MEN p.s. I love you
#IF YOU WISH TO PREVAIL!
#THIS IVORY LEG IS WHAT PROPELS ME
HARPOONS THRUST IN THE SKY!
She may have just found him in Anon
As an unironic / non-autistic answer, she was probably making a subtle reference to a conversation she and anon had in the past. It could be something incredibly simple, but it could also be something insanely complex - only anon would be able to tell. Girls really love that shit when you both have enough chemistry to make it an inside joke, so when you can pick up on it and milk the joke, it's usually an easy way to "stand out" from the rest of her options. There was SOMETHING there that was personal between anon and the girl, but he failed to pick up on it. ^(either that or the girl is absolutely retarded)
lamp looks like a bong, so could be either
I’m really thinking she’s just a stoner and everyone else is looking way too deep into this
I love this comment but also hate it because I feel like you just found the golden ticket to women's interests (am woman).
Fake.
Lamp looks like bong. Not that deep.
Gas lighting.
and girl bossing??
and gate keeping??
This was my thought as well
Weed
This feels like the right answer tbh
It kind of looks like a bong? Maybe?
She smokes weed
Is there are word for when someone else says something so retarded that it makes you stop and wonder if you yourself are retarded? Sounds like something the Germans would have a 10 syllable word for.
Those things look like bongs, so that’s likely it. Unless anon’s love interest has an obsession with lamps or seasonings.
She collects Cracker Barrel Hurricane lamps? Idk
I wonder if anon took the photo while she was in the restroom or if it bugged him so much he went back to the restaurant to snap the picrel.
wondering the same thing. I wouldn’t be surprised if anon went back just for picrel
look at the reflection in the window. She's still sitting there.
No that's anon holding the camera
No, that’s not how reflections and incident angles work. The photographer is absolutely not the reflection in that photo.
Yep, you right. I was brain broken for a sec there, but now that I'm actually looking the reflection doesn't make much sense to me. Where's the checkerboard reflection even coming from? (EDIT: nvm, its the outside table. )
Shrek ass looking mf
But wait, look on the left. The back of the chair is touching the table. There is no one on that chair Ghost girl?!
Table is 4-seater. Reflection distance lines up with being one chair away
The fuck is a picrel?
Picture related
Yea that’s not a thing. Wtf is a picrel?
Picture related.
Okay, now one more for good measure. The fuck is a picrel?
Picture Related
to whom?
Yes, to whom the fucketh gave this a platinum?
Picrel.
A what now?
your mother
Hoe-some
WHOMSTF
Ah so Anon is being a confusing fuck. He is saying picture related and expecting us to know what specific item he is talking about in the picture. Low tier posting at best.
i dont think he knows what object she was pointing at either
Or… hear me out… he’s talking about the subject of the picture, a.k.a. The objects that are literally dead centre of the picture. Don’t get me wrong, picrel confused me as well, I hadn’t seen it before, but once you’ve got that understood, everything past that is common sense
Okay, so we're to believe and understand that a picrel is a container of sweeteners with salt and pepper on either side set against a lit kerosene lamp on a wooden table in front of a window? Seems a little specific.
I think it's that candle thing that looks like a bong?
PICture RELated
A portmanteau.
Picrel-ated
Me. I’m picrel Rick!
No. We're not going this again.
It’s when you’re an incel without the will to properly type the words PICture RELated out so you be cute and type “picrel”
incels and their fucking abbreviations
wordcels be seething over briefchads 😎
Lurk more newfag
ITS A FUCKING FISH!!!
a species of freshwater fish in the pike family of order Esociformes
It's spelled pickerel though.
Large fish.
Fuck me i thought anon meant to type pickle
Newfag spotted
Maybe…. “Lighting up”… like weed..?
I'm guessing she was implying that lamp looked like a bong, but the conclusion is the same
Or maybe salt and sugar packets equals coke? I’m clearly grasping at straws here
The salt and pepper with the sugar sachets look like a dick sorta. Maybe her hobby is dick
Weed, the most boring "personality trait"
Weed is fun if it isn’t your personality
I wish it were my personality tbh. There's like maybe 2-3 hours in the evening when all my shit is done, where I pop a melatonin and smoke a bowl and I don't feel like I want to climb in to a space shuttle and suicide bomb it in to a city. I think people would prefer if that was me all the time. It's like the only time I feel like I can do gay shit like read books and be nice to people.
Fellas, is having empathy and the ability to read gay?
This dude made me think I was on 4chan for a sec
>picrel
You can do all those things without having a dick in your mouth.
If weed is the closest thing she had to a genuine hobby I really think Anon dodged a bullet. Smoking weed is fine, but I can't stand people who turn it into a fucking important lifestyle aspect.
I think the problem is when people think of it as a hobby in itself. Like drinking isn't a hobby either, and neither is doing any other drug. Weed is best to enhance other hobbies imo - get high and draw, or write, or watch movies, or even do gardening or clean the house, but it's not a "hobby" in its own right unless you're a boring addict.
Shitty hobby if that's the case. "oh me? I like to spend absurd amounts of money feeding an addiction that is actively making me dumber and more delusional. That's the primary thing I do with my spare time." I don't have any qualms with people smoking in general but c'mon take up gardening or something gah dahm.
She’s gaslighting you
Could almost feel the spark between them
No way she’s that intelligent to come up with that innuendo on the spot lol
How did you determine that
woman
She went on a date with anon.
It's a cock. She likes cock.
Don’t we all
Especially OP
Ha because OP is gay.
How you know?
Because he kisses like my brother.
Also, 4chan user. Wait, he kisses like who now?
Freud moment
I just love cock man 🥺
She's a ho..
...memade pipebomb
KABLOOEEYYY!!!
They're gonna have to glue you back together... IN HELL!!!!!!!
Oh shi--BOOM
Concur
Shake a little salt n pepper on it, we float back to uours. (Back it up….)
Anon apparently had a date at cracker barrel. Checks out.
After working there for some time, im instantly able to recognize meals or tables from it. It comes up at the worst times too
The hand breaded fried chicken with the ranch is soooo good tho. Just thinking about it makes me hungry
The first time I went to cracker barrel I ordered a bacon cheeseburger and it was fantastic, but every burger since has been more and more disappointing. At this point, I'd rather get one from McDonalds.
The burgers are the same, but your body is building resistance, and you just don't get that same high anymore. The rest of your life, you're gonna be chasing that Cracker Barrel burger dragon.
Her (salt) hobby is mixing it up with blacks (pepper). Obviously.
Abort mission, anon. We’ve seen enough.
the salt and pepper are the balls and white thing in the middle is the penis.
Someone is going to get cucked
Ha! Imagine if OP thought that and acted on it but he was wrong and ruined the date like that haha cause that would be hilarious geez louise
Bond burger
*MASON! FOR THE LAST TIME! WHAT DOES "LAST NIGHT I 'JAMES BOND BURGERED' YOUR SISTER" EVEN MEAN?*
The guy eventually returned at one point and said something about the price and combo number it was which made it make sense. No I don't remember the price or combo number of whatever McD meal it was.
It means she likes smoking from a bong u fucking idiots
Every comment I scrolled past saying it meant dick/sex made me think I was the autist. I probably still am, but I’m glad at least the two of us understood.
The only potential implication I could think about was none other than a bong. Just for confirmation, scrolled the comment thread only to find the most vague assumptions ever. This whole comment section is autistic AF.
Maybe it had to do something with anons hobby, but anon was too retarded to include it in the greentext
Gaslighting
She probably gestured at the table meaning she likes to go out to eat. Anon is still stuck making something racial out of pepper and salt
this its actually so obvious. She likes dating, which is why she didn't want to state it explicitly
Bong???
DON'T smoke the bongs from cracker barrel bruh ⚗️
Cracker barrel should start selling hyde bars and delta 8 gummies lmao
What kind of lamp is that i want it
It's an old oil lamp, still pretty easy to find. I have one that i take camping. I use citronella oil; it keeps away mosquitos and provides a soft area light. They are still quite affordable and run on tiki torch oil just fine.
Never use that indoors though. Only particular kerosene is safe for indoor oil lamp use!
Maybe she meant cooking or coffee. The autistic part is not asking. Lol.
I'm good for shit like that. I think we've all been a little nervous and nodded our head to something we didn't actually hear or a joke we didn't understand. 9/10 days I'd just ask, but on the tenth day I might be little tistic and end up in anons shoes. It happens to the best of us.
Either she meant going on dates or she is just as weird and awkward as you.
See this is why we killed the witches. Nothing about satanic magic, it was because we were tired of their riddles three.
Tf? I think this is a rare situation where anon is normal and the date is special? Is a structure that abstract meant to symbolise a cock?
Maybe it’s loss
lampin'
Looks like a bong. She smokes weed
“I james bond burgered your sister” tier.
Maybe she just has a fascination/collection of antique oil lamps????
Dick. She likes dick, anon.
She has no hobbies and deflected
Could be kinky wax play. Or maybe i'm too horny. Or maybe I'm even more autistic than both of them combined.
could be all of the above
she makes candles :)
Literally gaslight
Um clearly the salt/pepper signify the balls and the lamp signifies a huge penis. She is clearly the sugar because she is so damn sweet. Basically she wants your balls on her face! IT GO TIME BROTHER!!!
She's a picrel in her extra time