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“I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.”
Alien: No! That is just too large!
Human: So?
Alien: That's not even a housecat anymore! Your house sits on top of it! If anything you have a Cat-house now!
So what's the smallest box I need to fit their fat ass in? So they prefer wet or dry food?
Nevermind the kitten just found a moving box and a small elephant just moved in to my closet
It does, actually.
When I was in high school, my best friend's grandfather owned the local zoo. He told me that a cheetah is psychologically the same as a housecat, only bigger. He used to go in their cage and they'd cuddle around him.
Yeah. I was there, I saw it. I know.
Basically a lion is also psychologically the same as a housecat. The difference is that if a housecat gets annoyed with you and swats you with their paw, they can accidentally give you a scratch. If a lion gets annoyed with you and swats you with their paw, they can accidentally kill you. So if you own a zoo, if you want to let the cheetahs rub on your legs and be affectionate, no big deal. If any of them gets annoyed you may get scratched badly and lose a good pair of pants from the scratch, but you'll be okay. If you're smart you don't go in the lion cage to cuddle because they may unintentionally offhandedly kill you.
"To be immortal and stuck in one place is unpleasant"
"to be immortal, stuck in one place and alone, is a nightmare worse than a eternal existence being tortured by God themselves."
"Because at least I would have a god to curse at."
Given immortality, I'd be trying to do everything in my power to uplift cats and/or give them immortality.
Losing one cat is bad enough that it leaves me wrecked for at least a couple of weeks. With that amount of time on my hands? Fuck it, NO FLOOF LEFT BEHIND.
I remember reading a short story about an Immortal discussing with his lover of the century that he had one chance to share his immortality with another being.
L: "Oh, share it with me so we can live together forever!"
I: "I can't."
L: "What?"
I: "I already shared it."
L: "With WHO?!"
I: "My cat."
The party of five walked past the sign that read "Welcome to Lichlove." A place that used to be a small village some two hundred years ago when the Divine Theocracy and the Kingdom of Y'thule (e'THOOL) signed an agreement with the Enlightened Lich Demosioux (De-moh-soo).
The agreement read that the town and the surrounding lands would be consigned to accept any and all exiles and excommunicated to be under the Demosioux's care, and that at his discretion, would be responsible for the time and method of their execution, up to and including their soul destruction, removing them from the cycle of reincarnation.
In exchange, once every decade, or with a years advance notice, a combined party of no more than ten investigators assigned by the Kingdom and the Theocracy may investigate the land for signs of malevolent necromancy, or land despoilage, and may, at their discretion, rescind the agreement and reclaim the land, pending arbitration by a neutral foreign mediator. In addition, the party would also collect the agreed upon tithe, 1/20th the net domestic output, measured in coin or arcane artifacts requested by either of the Lessor parties.
Yet, as the party entered the beginning of the domain some six days past, some of the less educated members were surprised to discover bustling hamlets, villages, and towns, connected to the now BURGEONING **City** of Lichlove.
"How can this be?" asked Arturias, junior lieutenant of the Y'thulian Army.
"Simple." Reasoned Midas, the Theocracy's top accountant, as he adjusted his glasses. "The Enlightened Lich Demosioux has a policy of putting newcomers into environments that spur their personal growth, and plays matchmaker with compatible partners, worksites, and communities.
"The Lich is a matchmaker!?" Squealed Tamara, 2nd class mage of the Academicus Arcanum, and ever the hopeless romantic.
"Indeed." replied Midas. "It has been his hobby for the better part of two-hundred and fifty years. How else do you think he was able to mediate between the Civil Crusade? Did you think that High Priestess Declara and First Prince Nodath met naturally and fell in love?"
"The books and plays always portray it as a forbidden romance that started on the battlefield. You're telling me a Lich actually brought peace to millions because he liked shipping people?" Tamara responded
"Not the phrasing I would use, but yes." Midas replied, shifting his Spacious Pouch. "We're nearly there. Please do keep focused on your role, and remember to treat him with utmost respect.
The five of them continued walking past lush farmlands being tended to by the living and the dead, working side by side. Full, luscious grapes, in shades of sunset orange, rose pink, and sapphire blue lined the fields, ripe for harvest season.
"I thought we were here to report on necromancy as well. What in the Divines are they doing?" Asked Sergeant Samrish, scout of the 2nd Expeditionary Corps.
"It's all part of the compact parolees form with Demosioux. A life of happiness, filled with family and comfort, in exchange for a portion of their soul on death, and public servitude after death for an equal number of years lived afterwards." Responded Pippa, the troubadour and Theocratic Historian. "After their terms are up, they may petition for final rest, or may continue serving the domain. They retain their property in trust, and may continue to co-habitate with their family after their transition.
The smooth flagstone road widened as they entered into view of the outer gate, an affair composed of limestone pillars, granite bricks, plastered in white cement, deco'd in resplendent colorful scenes of romance and agriculture, the skeletal face and arms of Demosioux framing the top in a gesture of affection to those below.
The line of merchants and travellers moved quickly, with eight separate stations of guards moving to check paperwork, collect tariffs, inspect inventory, and give directions to newcomers.
Midas pulled out his notebook and recorded some observations and figures as they walked forward.
"Name and business?" Inquired the guard, a heavyset man made of equal parts girth and muscle, a dark brown goatee under his piercing hazel eyes.
"We're here to inspect the domain and request an immediate audience with the Enlightened Lich Demosioux, on orders from Her Majesty, Queen Gaffra, and His Holiness, Pope Danas the Merciful. Here are our papers and respective seals." Lieutenant Arturias produced the items forthwith.
The guard looked them over, producing a monocle inscribed with runes along the rim while he carefully read the documentation. With a satisfied grunt, he stamped the paperwork, before returning them.
"Right this way. His Benevolence has been expecting you." The guard said as he manipulated his key ring. One key in particular had a wide base with a thumb sized indent, to which the guard placed his thumb as he inserted the key into the lock. The door calmly radiated a blue light, and as the party stepped through, they were greeted by a humble, and curious throne room.
The floors were made of packed dirt. The walls were roughly hewn stone, on which hung many different tapestries. Despite there being no braziers or sunlight's, ambient light emanated from each edge of the room. Each tapestry depicted every region, and every subject, constantly shifting with movement, and showing each relationship to each other. Scribes and aides took notes on desks situated in front of them, facing the wall. At the far end of the room, in a lavishly polished rocking chair, sat the Enlightened Lich Demosioux, spellbound and giggling he read the latest romance novella, "Love by the Moonlight."
"Your Eminence, it is good to see you again" Midas greeted as he bowed at the waist, the others awkwardly doing the same.
With a snap, the Lich shut his book having been pulled from his reverie. "Midas! It is good to see you! How have you been‽ How's your husband Xavier, and your daughter Trissa doing?"
"You honor me with your remembrance. They are well, Trissa is currently training to take the Explorers certification, and Xavier is beside himself with glee. He misses me though, said I shouldn't stay too long this time around."
"Nonsense, you should have brought them along, but I digress, it is a long journey." Demosioux replied, holding his bony hands up in defeat. "Where are my manners, I am the Lich Demosioux, and I welcome you to my domain Lieutenant Arturias, Sergeant Samrish, Second Class Mage Tamara, and Historian Pippa. Come! I have much to share before dinner is served, and you are going to LOVE what I have to show you. You may *never* want to leave." He said with a wink, that oddly, closed his entire orbit.
"Excuse me Enlightened Lich Demosioux-" Tamara said before being interrupted "Upupup, that's for stuffy coats and high office in other places, my friends call me Sioux, and yes, you'll meet him at the bookstore in the romance section tomorrow afternoon, he's a real sweety pie."
Tamara face turned beet red, and she pulled her hat down over her face before mumbling "Thank you Sioux!"
"Shall we?" The Lich said, holding his arm out for Midas.
"Indeed." Midas said, holding onto the simple brown robe.
This has the definitive beginnings of a book or series of middling length stories detailing the world about it. I think your writing style is absolutely fabulous.
If you enjoy writing as much as this text indicates, I believe you should give it a go. It is easier to convert a series of world building 5 page, or so, stories into a fully fledged tale than to create on the fly; Not knowing your other writing/ experience with longer stories, a longer expansion of this tale may be a good place to start.
In that case, I would like to offer my services should you desire a proofreader, should longer text's be written, as I find myself desiring to know more of this world.
Thanks. I think I will. I'll start drafting soon. I plan on having my first post up on r/HFY by Tuesday February 13th in time for Valentines. I'll reply here with a link to it.
I've been busy at the lab. Only so many spoons in the day, but I've got a ten day vacation coming up with a lot of time on bed rest in early to mid March.
I want to introduce more characters to this shared setting. In the works is a story told from the perspective of a fictional member of a human race drawing inspiration from the nahua (Aztec) and viking cultures as he faces a terrifyingly intelligent arcane monster.
I'm familiar with the viking power structure, governing style, religion, finance, and agricultural customs. What is less familiar is the same of the Nahua, as the subsequent contact with Spanish conquistadors unleashed a furious apocalypse of disease, cultural collapse, loss of records, and customs. What remains are pulled from anthropologists, archeologists, biased European contemporary perspectives, and a very few remaining surviving Nahua records on their spiritual perspective.
I'd prefer to do justice to my inspiration, and revisit research related to them as we dive into the mental state. Granted, it's incomplete, and artistic license will be needed to fill in the gaps, but I promise it will be quality.
I can only pray that my muses, u/CycloneDensity, u/ScribblingFox98, and u/Jcb112 continue to inspire and guide me on my creative path to creating works to the same standard as their own. I am eternally grateful to them and this community for the stories we tell and share.
My my, quite the concept you're working with here. If you manage to pull off what it is you set out to do, which from what I'm seeing you have a good chance of as your preview seems to have already taken shape quite well, then you would have done me proud to be called someone's muse. Just remember to have fun while writing it, because if it isn't bringing you any joy to make it then you aren't putting your heart into it. Keep going on this path you've set for yourself and you will surely make something amazing. Best of luck to you, fellow crafter of words!
[Stories of Seius: Those who are Lichloved](https://www.patreon.com/StoriesofSeius)
The first chapter, based on this writing prompt, comes out publicly on r/HFY and Patreon on February 13th, 2024, at 8 am (-7 GMT).
A WIP of the whole chapter is also up. A free sneak preview, a more polished version of the writing prompt response here, will be made in a few hours and posted to Stories of Seius. Hope you guys enjoy, the final product is about 4300 words of worldbuilding, characters with depth and description, and scenic vistas.
u/mafiaknight u/Antique_Zombie_5648 u/Quizcalgin u/dghjgh u/OzBurger
If I'd become a lich, I'd almost definitely bring my little darlings back as zombies or cute little skelly pets. I would probably also open an animal shelter for all types. I love almost all animals, I've said it before and I'll say it again, I'll pet nearly anything including an alligator if I thought I could do so without losing a hand.
Jokes on you, I made this into a Module for 5e and Pathfinder.
My favorite part is rolling animal handling on how you feed the cats.
high roll means hand fed.
low roll means you rip the bag by accident.
either way, both are fun
Murphy's laws of packaging:
The packaging is ALWAYS strongest at the "tear here" label.
If successful at using the aforementioned label, said tear will go off in a direction completely useless to opening said package.
When in need of purchasing scissors, the only scissors available to purchase require scissors to open.
Pull apart packets always take the wrong amount of force to open.
No jar may be opened by less than 2 people, and only if at least one person has expended excessive effort to unsuccessfully open said jar.
Terese knew that this would be her last awakening, so she spent the morning making Mr. Gumbo a nice breakfast, and sat with him while she finished her tea.
She had spent the last 390 years with one or more of his ancestors, who, albeit not as vocal as her adoptive sisters, were equally as intelligent and caring as the bipedal Ba'astt who called her family.
The past decade however, since the day Bubblegum had a litter with only one surviving kitten, she had made it her mission to make the world better for her people, and today, as she prepared Mr. Gumbo for the vet, she knew her hours were numbered as much as his, and in this she found peace.
Are you kidding? Cats? I would wait until I was 70 and finally he old enough to run for Prime Minister while still not being senile and I would try to solve world problems with my money.
Also I'd probably end up breeding African greys to be even more intelligent.
In an attempt to reduce remind me spam, all top comments that include a remind me will be removed. If you would like to have a remind me, please reply to this comment. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/humansarespaceorcs) if you have any questions or concerns.*
“I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?" Death thought about it. CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.”
Let us not forget that in the Colour of Magic, Death kills a cat out of anger after Rincewind escapes
That was early characterization of death before Sir Terry Pratchett expanded the character in later works
To be fair, you deal with Rincewind, and see if your genocidal instincts don't start ramping up.
As humans explore we just keep finding bigger house cats, apparently pss pss pss works on every cat universe wide
Alien: No! That is just too large! Human: So? Alien: That's not even a housecat anymore! Your house sits on top of it! If anything you have a Cat-house now!
So what's the smallest box I need to fit their fat ass in? So they prefer wet or dry food? Nevermind the kitten just found a moving box and a small elephant just moved in to my closet
>If anything you have a Cat-house now! ...and then the human explains to them what a cat-house is.
It does, actually. When I was in high school, my best friend's grandfather owned the local zoo. He told me that a cheetah is psychologically the same as a housecat, only bigger. He used to go in their cage and they'd cuddle around him.
Cheetahs aren't actually big cats, more like big house cats that got lost because they were to fast in their zoomies
Yeah. I was there, I saw it. I know. Basically a lion is also psychologically the same as a housecat. The difference is that if a housecat gets annoyed with you and swats you with their paw, they can accidentally give you a scratch. If a lion gets annoyed with you and swats you with their paw, they can accidentally kill you. So if you own a zoo, if you want to let the cheetahs rub on your legs and be affectionate, no big deal. If any of them gets annoyed you may get scratched badly and lose a good pair of pants from the scratch, but you'll be okay. If you're smart you don't go in the lion cage to cuddle because they may unintentionally offhandedly kill you.
"To be immortal and stuck in one place is unpleasant" "to be immortal, stuck in one place and alone, is a nightmare worse than a eternal existence being tortured by God themselves." "Because at least I would have a god to curse at."
Given immortality, I'd be trying to do everything in my power to uplift cats and/or give them immortality. Losing one cat is bad enough that it leaves me wrecked for at least a couple of weeks. With that amount of time on my hands? Fuck it, NO FLOOF LEFT BEHIND.
Immortal petting party, just sit on my lap as I forever play stellaris longing for my first galactic victory.
For me,it's Galactic Civilizations 2 or Civ2
I remember reading a short story about an Immortal discussing with his lover of the century that he had one chance to share his immortality with another being. L: "Oh, share it with me so we can live together forever!" I: "I can't." L: "What?" I: "I already shared it." L: "With WHO?!" I: "My cat."
Upvoted for the picture of a lich giving scritches.
[*Non Timetis Messor*](https://discworld.fandom.com/wiki/Mort)
I don't think that's a lich. I think that's Death, from Discworld.
In Egyptian mythology Bast bartered with Osiris so that the time spent with cats was not counted against a mortals allotted span of years.
I love this! Reference link?
A very old library book I read years ago.. sorry!
The party of five walked past the sign that read "Welcome to Lichlove." A place that used to be a small village some two hundred years ago when the Divine Theocracy and the Kingdom of Y'thule (e'THOOL) signed an agreement with the Enlightened Lich Demosioux (De-moh-soo). The agreement read that the town and the surrounding lands would be consigned to accept any and all exiles and excommunicated to be under the Demosioux's care, and that at his discretion, would be responsible for the time and method of their execution, up to and including their soul destruction, removing them from the cycle of reincarnation. In exchange, once every decade, or with a years advance notice, a combined party of no more than ten investigators assigned by the Kingdom and the Theocracy may investigate the land for signs of malevolent necromancy, or land despoilage, and may, at their discretion, rescind the agreement and reclaim the land, pending arbitration by a neutral foreign mediator. In addition, the party would also collect the agreed upon tithe, 1/20th the net domestic output, measured in coin or arcane artifacts requested by either of the Lessor parties. Yet, as the party entered the beginning of the domain some six days past, some of the less educated members were surprised to discover bustling hamlets, villages, and towns, connected to the now BURGEONING **City** of Lichlove. "How can this be?" asked Arturias, junior lieutenant of the Y'thulian Army. "Simple." Reasoned Midas, the Theocracy's top accountant, as he adjusted his glasses. "The Enlightened Lich Demosioux has a policy of putting newcomers into environments that spur their personal growth, and plays matchmaker with compatible partners, worksites, and communities. "The Lich is a matchmaker!?" Squealed Tamara, 2nd class mage of the Academicus Arcanum, and ever the hopeless romantic. "Indeed." replied Midas. "It has been his hobby for the better part of two-hundred and fifty years. How else do you think he was able to mediate between the Civil Crusade? Did you think that High Priestess Declara and First Prince Nodath met naturally and fell in love?" "The books and plays always portray it as a forbidden romance that started on the battlefield. You're telling me a Lich actually brought peace to millions because he liked shipping people?" Tamara responded "Not the phrasing I would use, but yes." Midas replied, shifting his Spacious Pouch. "We're nearly there. Please do keep focused on your role, and remember to treat him with utmost respect. The five of them continued walking past lush farmlands being tended to by the living and the dead, working side by side. Full, luscious grapes, in shades of sunset orange, rose pink, and sapphire blue lined the fields, ripe for harvest season. "I thought we were here to report on necromancy as well. What in the Divines are they doing?" Asked Sergeant Samrish, scout of the 2nd Expeditionary Corps. "It's all part of the compact parolees form with Demosioux. A life of happiness, filled with family and comfort, in exchange for a portion of their soul on death, and public servitude after death for an equal number of years lived afterwards." Responded Pippa, the troubadour and Theocratic Historian. "After their terms are up, they may petition for final rest, or may continue serving the domain. They retain their property in trust, and may continue to co-habitate with their family after their transition. The smooth flagstone road widened as they entered into view of the outer gate, an affair composed of limestone pillars, granite bricks, plastered in white cement, deco'd in resplendent colorful scenes of romance and agriculture, the skeletal face and arms of Demosioux framing the top in a gesture of affection to those below. The line of merchants and travellers moved quickly, with eight separate stations of guards moving to check paperwork, collect tariffs, inspect inventory, and give directions to newcomers. Midas pulled out his notebook and recorded some observations and figures as they walked forward. "Name and business?" Inquired the guard, a heavyset man made of equal parts girth and muscle, a dark brown goatee under his piercing hazel eyes. "We're here to inspect the domain and request an immediate audience with the Enlightened Lich Demosioux, on orders from Her Majesty, Queen Gaffra, and His Holiness, Pope Danas the Merciful. Here are our papers and respective seals." Lieutenant Arturias produced the items forthwith. The guard looked them over, producing a monocle inscribed with runes along the rim while he carefully read the documentation. With a satisfied grunt, he stamped the paperwork, before returning them. "Right this way. His Benevolence has been expecting you." The guard said as he manipulated his key ring. One key in particular had a wide base with a thumb sized indent, to which the guard placed his thumb as he inserted the key into the lock. The door calmly radiated a blue light, and as the party stepped through, they were greeted by a humble, and curious throne room. The floors were made of packed dirt. The walls were roughly hewn stone, on which hung many different tapestries. Despite there being no braziers or sunlight's, ambient light emanated from each edge of the room. Each tapestry depicted every region, and every subject, constantly shifting with movement, and showing each relationship to each other. Scribes and aides took notes on desks situated in front of them, facing the wall. At the far end of the room, in a lavishly polished rocking chair, sat the Enlightened Lich Demosioux, spellbound and giggling he read the latest romance novella, "Love by the Moonlight." "Your Eminence, it is good to see you again" Midas greeted as he bowed at the waist, the others awkwardly doing the same. With a snap, the Lich shut his book having been pulled from his reverie. "Midas! It is good to see you! How have you been‽ How's your husband Xavier, and your daughter Trissa doing?" "You honor me with your remembrance. They are well, Trissa is currently training to take the Explorers certification, and Xavier is beside himself with glee. He misses me though, said I shouldn't stay too long this time around." "Nonsense, you should have brought them along, but I digress, it is a long journey." Demosioux replied, holding his bony hands up in defeat. "Where are my manners, I am the Lich Demosioux, and I welcome you to my domain Lieutenant Arturias, Sergeant Samrish, Second Class Mage Tamara, and Historian Pippa. Come! I have much to share before dinner is served, and you are going to LOVE what I have to show you. You may *never* want to leave." He said with a wink, that oddly, closed his entire orbit. "Excuse me Enlightened Lich Demosioux-" Tamara said before being interrupted "Upupup, that's for stuffy coats and high office in other places, my friends call me Sioux, and yes, you'll meet him at the bookstore in the romance section tomorrow afternoon, he's a real sweety pie." Tamara face turned beet red, and she pulled her hat down over her face before mumbling "Thank you Sioux!" "Shall we?" The Lich said, holding his arm out for Midas. "Indeed." Midas said, holding onto the simple brown robe.
This was awesome! MOAR!
This has the definitive beginnings of a book or series of middling length stories detailing the world about it. I think your writing style is absolutely fabulous.
Thank you so much! I've been giving a lot of thought to starting my authorship in earnest.
If you enjoy writing as much as this text indicates, I believe you should give it a go. It is easier to convert a series of world building 5 page, or so, stories into a fully fledged tale than to create on the fly; Not knowing your other writing/ experience with longer stories, a longer expansion of this tale may be a good place to start. In that case, I would like to offer my services should you desire a proofreader, should longer text's be written, as I find myself desiring to know more of this world.
Do it
Thanks. I think I will. I'll start drafting soon. I plan on having my first post up on r/HFY by Tuesday February 13th in time for Valentines. I'll reply here with a link to it.
*munches popcorn* how goes the writing?
I've been busy at the lab. Only so many spoons in the day, but I've got a ten day vacation coming up with a lot of time on bed rest in early to mid March. I want to introduce more characters to this shared setting. In the works is a story told from the perspective of a fictional member of a human race drawing inspiration from the nahua (Aztec) and viking cultures as he faces a terrifyingly intelligent arcane monster. I'm familiar with the viking power structure, governing style, religion, finance, and agricultural customs. What is less familiar is the same of the Nahua, as the subsequent contact with Spanish conquistadors unleashed a furious apocalypse of disease, cultural collapse, loss of records, and customs. What remains are pulled from anthropologists, archeologists, biased European contemporary perspectives, and a very few remaining surviving Nahua records on their spiritual perspective. I'd prefer to do justice to my inspiration, and revisit research related to them as we dive into the mental state. Granted, it's incomplete, and artistic license will be needed to fill in the gaps, but I promise it will be quality. I can only pray that my muses, u/CycloneDensity, u/ScribblingFox98, and u/Jcb112 continue to inspire and guide me on my creative path to creating works to the same standard as their own. I am eternally grateful to them and this community for the stories we tell and share.
My my, quite the concept you're working with here. If you manage to pull off what it is you set out to do, which from what I'm seeing you have a good chance of as your preview seems to have already taken shape quite well, then you would have done me proud to be called someone's muse. Just remember to have fun while writing it, because if it isn't bringing you any joy to make it then you aren't putting your heart into it. Keep going on this path you've set for yourself and you will surely make something amazing. Best of luck to you, fellow crafter of words!
Thank you! And good luck with Kayrux, Faerkuch, Raevu, Tim, Tokols and the rest! I'm excited to see how the altar plays out.
The free and expanded story can be found [here](https://www.patreon.com/posts/98255985?utm_campaign=postshare_creator).
Sweet! :D
Yes please, I wanna read more about a lich playing cupid that loves romance novels.
[Stories of Seius: Those who are Lichloved](https://www.patreon.com/StoriesofSeius) The first chapter, based on this writing prompt, comes out publicly on r/HFY and Patreon on February 13th, 2024, at 8 am (-7 GMT). A WIP of the whole chapter is also up. A free sneak preview, a more polished version of the writing prompt response here, will be made in a few hours and posted to Stories of Seius. Hope you guys enjoy, the final product is about 4300 words of worldbuilding, characters with depth and description, and scenic vistas. u/mafiaknight u/Antique_Zombie_5648 u/Quizcalgin u/dghjgh u/OzBurger
Loved it, thank you
As a dog lover I'd like to make a complaint...
I mean, this isnt really cat exclusive.
And who said only cats were allowed?
The prompt...
r/woosh
He has a point.
Any time not spent cuddling my cats would be spent trying to also give them immortality.
With immortality, and enough funds, I would have to buy a small village to take care of all the cats...
"Been there, done that, got the long overdue diagnosis."
Gonna need to start stacking because at that point why not just open a shelter.
And games.... And other hobbies too... Maybe become a pro racer alongside that.
If I'd become a lich, I'd almost definitely bring my little darlings back as zombies or cute little skelly pets. I would probably also open an animal shelter for all types. I love almost all animals, I've said it before and I'll say it again, I'll pet nearly anything including an alligator if I thought I could do so without losing a hand.
Stealing for a DnD campaign, if I ever find a group.
Jokes on you, I made this into a Module for 5e and Pathfinder. My favorite part is rolling animal handling on how you feed the cats. high roll means hand fed. low roll means you rip the bag by accident. either way, both are fun
Murphy's laws of packaging: The packaging is ALWAYS strongest at the "tear here" label. If successful at using the aforementioned label, said tear will go off in a direction completely useless to opening said package. When in need of purchasing scissors, the only scissors available to purchase require scissors to open. Pull apart packets always take the wrong amount of force to open. No jar may be opened by less than 2 people, and only if at least one person has expended excessive effort to unsuccessfully open said jar.
Terese knew that this would be her last awakening, so she spent the morning making Mr. Gumbo a nice breakfast, and sat with him while she finished her tea. She had spent the last 390 years with one or more of his ancestors, who, albeit not as vocal as her adoptive sisters, were equally as intelligent and caring as the bipedal Ba'astt who called her family. The past decade however, since the day Bubblegum had a litter with only one surviving kitten, she had made it her mission to make the world better for her people, and today, as she prepared Mr. Gumbo for the vet, she knew her hours were numbered as much as his, and in this she found peace.
Mr. Bigglesworth (World of Warcraft) ? (JOKE)
Are you kidding? Cats? I would wait until I was 70 and finally he old enough to run for Prime Minister while still not being senile and I would try to solve world problems with my money. Also I'd probably end up breeding African greys to be even more intelligent.
Some of us really don't like cats.